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File: 1714767798819.jpeg (41.24 KB, 361x347, 2EE9A1BE-ABFB-455F-BFB3-2F0E17…)

No. 395302[Reply]

since i got with my bf i blocked and removed all guy friends (never had really any close online gfs) and i’m feeling rlly lonely. i always found girls rlly intimidating to talk to and/or not understanding of my humour so i’d tend to mask heavily around them (felt fake) and i haven’t found any like me and i wish i could just have girlfriends to call up and ft whenever i want. how do i find gfs that r into gamering and have the same typical incel fag humour i do ??????? i came to lolcow to maybe have some luck. also is there like a discord or something(newfag retardation)

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No. 280759[Reply]

A concept generally related to disfuncional families, toxic family bonds, lack of boundaries with parents, infantilization in adulthood, the mother wound, growing up too quickly, and much more.

In enmeshed families, members are emotionally fused together in an unhealthy way. More than one member is codependent of the other and individual goals are discouraged. A lot of shame and guilt happens when you try to become independent. You can read more here:
https://www.livewellwithsharonmartin.com/enmeshment/
https://www.healthline.com/health/enmeshed-family#signs-of-enmeshment
https://tessrene.com/emotional-enmeshment/

As this is something I very much struggle with, I wanted to see if more anons here have gone through similar stuff, and how were you able to overcome it (or maybe just like me, you are in the process of recovering from). Please share your own experience with family enmeshment here.
10 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 282084

also this
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-emotional-intensity/201907/4-ways-release-anger-towards-your-parents#:~:text=The%20causes%20of%20lifelong%20anger,Physical%2C%20mental%2C%20or%20sexual%20abuse
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/anger-at-parents-in-adulthood/

No. 282113

might also be helpful

No. 283807

bell hooks mentioned going through a time in her life where she was severely depressed and suicidal and how the only way she got through it was through changing her environment: She surrounded her home with buddhas of all colors, Audre Lorde’s A Litany for Survival facing her as she wakes up, and filling the space she saw everyday with reinforcing objects and meaningful books. She asks herself each day, “What are you going to do today to resist domination?” I also really liked it when she said that in order to move from pain to power, it is crucial to engage in “an active rewriting of our lives.”

No. 284365

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No. 394987

Decenter your mom.


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No. 310088[Reply]

Discuss family planning, birth, pregnancy, conception, fertility, and any other baby-related topic in this thread.
Refrain from posting if you dislike children or are childfree.
Old threads
>>>/g/212315
>>>/g/49996
1199 posts and 69 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 394369

>>394293
do it if you want but do not do it because of pressure or fertility scares. There's nothing wrong with single parents if you socialize them correctly. My cousins baby was basically raised by our friend group and is an amazing kid

No. 394421

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There’s an “enbie” mom in my daughter’s Girl Scout troop, and I’m tempted to pull her out, but all her friends are in this troop, so I don’t want to be the bad guy

No. 394422

LOCKING IMMINENT

Thread has exceeded 1200 posts and is about to be locked! Please create a new thread and post a link to it.

No. 394423

>>394271
Thank you that makes me feel a little bit better. I’m sorry you had hyperemesis, I feel like I can’t really complain because it’s not that bad for me but man being pregnant is still annoying as hell!!

No. 394552

New thread >>394551


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No. 255346[Reply]

thread for harm reduction, support and venting
682 posts and 53 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 385148

Whenever I have to prepare food or eat I get the worst tension in my jaw and head area, it’s hard to describe but feels like my whole head is seizing up and being squeezed in a way that isn’t painful but feels like loads of pressure. I’m >2 years into a relapse and this is really hindering my recovery, receiving minimum professional help despite being over 10kg underweight. I don’t even care about losing weight anymore but I can’t seem to gain any because I’ve been fasting due to the extreme stress I go through at mealtimes. More than anything I want to relieve the tension so I can eat in relative peace, right now the only thing that helps is benzodiazepines. Anons do you have any advice?

No. 385205

>>385148
Does your jaw lock or is it just tension, is there ever pain?

No. 385244

>>385148
I don't have any medical advice but wtf just reading this makes me want to cry for you anon. You can't fast. You need to at least find some liquid calories that you can consume.

No. 385325

when does this shit end? i have been doing this crap for over 20 years. i've managed to get myself into healthy weight, i'm highest weight in my life at 18, but i wake up in the morning and cry when i see my body. i will never achieve my dream body from just losing weight alone, i lost this fight at birth, i've gone the spoop route but i will never get rid of my hips, breasts, etc latter always comes back first, i hate my feminine body, i wish i was shapeless and nothing.

No. 394309

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I gained 4 lbs and I'm so fucking suicidal. It is finals week and I need to hunker down and do my work but holy fuck I cannot stop thinking about it. And the weather is getting a lot warmer and I'm not going to be able to cover my body. God I hate myself so much.


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No. 367662[Reply]

A place for latina and hispanic women to chat, vent, offer advice, discuss latin american and hispanic culture. Spanish and portugese talk welcome.
78 posts and 19 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 394118

I feel most comfortable around other Mexican Americans like me, but I do feel left out when the conversations are exclusively Spanish. I'm a 3rd generation MXAmerican and was never taught proper Spanish. I started talking to this guy who has similar life goals, values, and his career is in a similar field. The thing that's making me anxious is I found his TikTok and he has more posts in Spanish than English, meaning he's probably more comfortable speaking his native tongue, so he'd probably prefer to be with someone who also is a Spanish speaker. When it comes to children, I'd like my future children to know Spanish, so if all works out he'd be the one to teach them better.
It's just overall weird being in my 30s in the dating world and preferring Mexican men who are sober lmao. Is it maybe too limited of a preference? but this is something I'm becoming way more comfortable acknowledging.

No. 394123

>>394118
>The thing that's making me anxious is I found his TikTok and he has more posts in Spanish than English, meaning he's probably more comfortable speaking his native tongue,
How is this a problem? Just practice Spanish with him. If you need to practice Spanish with anyone you can learn it with your family too. There's options out there. If this is of any help, you could also ask questions in this thread. I might be able to assist you as well

No. 394130

>>394123
That's true, one of the first questions he asked me if I knew Spanish and I said it's beginner level and he decided to continue further so it's not a big deal for him. I let my worries take over. I'm practicing at my job speaking to bilingual children and their parents so I think that's a good start.

No. 394150

>>393977
Interesting post.

>>394118
Just learn Spanish? You have your foot in the door already if you know some, proper or not. Also, sober Mexican men aren't exactly rare, I've known more sober ones than addicts and I'm not even from a particularly great neighborhood either.

No. 395220

>>382739
Comparing UAE to Europe is a bit crazy here. Even in the US people are still super racist depending on where you live. Some white people do not care and others treat you really badly. I'm white but growing up in AZ and CO I've noticed this, some places the two mix together very well, and other it has a very segregated racist feel.


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No. 393378[Reply]

A thread to discuss your attachment style, attachment issues, venting, how it impacts your life, how you deal with it etc.
18 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 393811

I'm anxious and I don't understand how people have secure attachment styles. I anxiously latch onto my partner and get told that I'm too clingy or needy, so I hardcore go in the other direction of "I am a strong independent woman and I don't care about anyone". It's miserable like this. It's always pain over partners that won't give me as much attention and I know it's not healthy either because I'm obsessive and codependent. But I don't know how to reel back without not caring at all. How are you supposed to care for someone without making it a massive priority and need?

No. 393976

My brain is wired wrong. I want hugs all the time, nuzzles all the time, non-stop. I am perpetually touch-starved and it's driving me up the walls.

I've tried to train myself to become used to not be so fucking clingy all the time but over 10+ years of trying it hasn't worked. I need the hugs. I'm constantly hugging and rubbing my face into my pillows while I'm alone at home. I wish I wasn't like this, it's not necessary to have or need this much physical affection but my brain doesn't care.

No. 393988

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I think I might have anxious attachment. When I have a crush I get so obsessed and jealous and it is the only thing I can think of. I also have a habit of social media stalking to see if my crush liked any other womans pictures etc. I almost always find something and break my heart a little bit. When the person I'm talking to won't message me back fast enough I get really upset and cry about it like a little kid. Sometimes I also get angry and block as punishment which just hurts me even more or text something really passive aggressive which only pushes other people away. It is really hard to have the anger or fear get the best of me. I am just a very needy and insecure person and I don't know how to fix myself. I am already in therapy but my fear and the anger often win. Every time I care about someone or fall in love I think stuff like "they don't care as much as you do" or "you are too ugly/too stupid for them to even consider you as a girlfriend. They only go on a date with you because they are bored." "Your crush probably talks to ten other women that are way more beautiful and accomplished than you." This mindset is so ugly but I cannot help it. I long for love and someone who only ever looks at me. I have a really hard time communicating my feelings and needs. Like when someone doesn't reply to my message for a day I lash out and get angry and try to ignore the other person even harder to get back at them but what I actually want to say is "It hurts when you ignore me because you are important to me and I want to talk more with you." But I feel embarrassed about it and am not sure if I can be this vulnerable. I have a first date tomorrow and I'm already scared of rejection because I've already imagined us getting married and adopting 3 cats. How tf do I fix myself.

No. 394001

Fearful avoidance is tough to deal with. It's easy for me to become so attached to someone and want their attention, but it's so difficult to ask for it. What makes it worse is being with someone who doesn't reciprocate my love that I want to receive back. I start becoming codependent on men who don't know how to do so. Having a clingy man is satisfying. I just need one who doesn't have a temper. I've only been in a relationship with 4 men in my life and I'm making sure I tell the next guy I date straight up I'm considered needy, because I have needs.

No. 394027

I'm not sure what to do because the world has proven me that being avoidant is self preservation. People are too judgemental and they will misunderstand you. So don't ever get close, don't be yourself, keep it all in. No matter if they "want to know you" it's all a lie, don't trust mfs


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No. 112369[Reply]

Didn't see a thread specifically for this kind of stuff so use this for discussion about things relating to bathroom stuff, advice, how to better your gut, how you personally maintain a healthy gut, general frustrations if you have an unhealthy gut (IBS, Crohns, etc) and/or how you manage it, asshole insecurities, etc.
797 posts and 68 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 393598

>>393576
I always see dumb shit about how "womens restrooms are sooo disgusting compared to mens'". It's become a meme at this point and I sincerely doubt the validity of that claim.

No. 393599

>>393598
The worst I see is maybe an unrolled pad

No. 393712

>>393598
I remember in middle school, the principle had to give a PSA to all the students about bathroom etiquette because the boys thought it would be funny to piss on the walls and floor.

No. 393719

>>393598
People clamouring to declare women the ickiest grossest gender have an agenda (reminds me of the 'akshually women are domestic abusers just as much and maybe even worse than men!!' cope) and I don't believe it. Theoretically women are dealing with potentially gross situations more often than men (periods, changing diapers, etc), we have to use the bathroom more frequently, and don't have urinals that might be a bit easier to keep clean. But women are overall more considerate and try to avoid inconveniencing others- why would that change in a bathroom? Even when attempting suicide women worry about whoever is going to see and clean up their body.

I've only ever had to clean women's rooms so I can't really compare but the cleanliness of a bathroom in my experience is based almost entirely on location (private vs public place, nice area vs dodgy area, if it's within a business that has people cleaning throughout the day, etc).

No. 397494

Lol short film
Saged because it needs to be saged


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No. 113303[Reply]

ITT:Just brag about your boyfriend or husband and what he does for you
mine does the cooking,cleans the bathroom,does the yard-work,works out so he's fit,cares for his sick grandmother and loves me unconditionally even when I'm not as fit as I used to be
857 posts and 88 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 393348

My cat was sleeping on his desk chair so he accepted his fate and just worked standing up

No. 393475

>>393269
>doesnt want gross porny misogynistic things.
>Asks to keep my used panties so he can smell them.
>Wants me to skip showers so he can smell my sweat and lick it.
>He likes kissing my feet and sucking my toes.

Doesn't he though?

No. 393498

>>393475
By gross and misogynistic I meant things like anal, stragulation and humiliation. But yes we're gross, youre correct.

My ex was overly concerned about my smell, taste and body hair. To the point where it made me insecure and turned off. My pleasure used to be entirely dependent on how I saw mysleld trough the mans eyes. It was all about me being youthful, hairless, submissive, kinky and willing to serve. Animals don't ruin their chances of reproducion by worrying about such. Just the smell of a female ready to mate is enough. Human males say they have preferences but they're actually just varying degrees of impotent.

I needed a gross man who gets turned on by the smell and taste of an adult woman. Like a caveman. A man that never gets bored of foreplay and vanilla sex. For me its a huge turn on that hes addicted to my smell of my used panties. Im the one with a reverse foot fetish, he is just turned on by pleasing me.

No. 393505

>>393475
How are those things porny or misogynistic? It's completely normal for a man to be attracted to how his girlfriend/wife smells and tastes, if not he's probably fucking gay. All the porn-addicted men you see aren't actually attracted to woman and are prissy losers turned off by any scent and body hair.
>>393498
>Human males say they have preferences but they're actually just varying degrees of impotent.
I've never seen it said this way, but this so fucking true.

No. 393509

>>393269
I'm happy for you nona

>>393475
>>393498
Kek sometimes i wonder if the 'leave him!!' anons cruelly lack experience when it comes to relationships and sex. Smell is a crucial part of affective bonds and lust. Women can be like this too


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No. 347288[Reply]

Previous thread: >>>/g/306284
1197 posts and 99 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 393425

>>393414
>>393421
The weather there is terrible imo but I have a strong hatred towards heat and earthquakes so idk it depends on the person

No. 393426

>>393421

Kek yes I definitely want to pass through socal since its basically most of the famous parts of CA anyway so thank you. I think I can live with the fact that its car-centric because its also like that here in PA, so I guess nothing would change in that way.

>>393425

At this point, I think I'm done with the cold. If I ever do miss the cold, I can just vacation out to Oregon or a nearby northern state to chill out. You've ever had to live in a cold, damp place like the UK or Ireland? I have and it made me want to off myself.

I've been through earthquakes before so no biggie.

No. 393428

>>393426
If you are going from PA to the west coast be prepared for some work-culture shock. Maybe in California people are cool but I massively preferred the work culture in Pittsburgh to that of Oregon. It was like people do not understand the function of a union on the west coast, they have it completely confused with the job of management. I really disliked this aspect of living there.

No. 393439

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>>393414
I was born and raised there, and just six months ago moved out to another state (had to move closer to my sister after she was widowed young) but I think about moving back every single day, I miss it so much. I’m biased because I was raised there but not even “cool” states like Colorado compare

I’ll be upfront with you though: cost of living is insane. I clear 80k a year and I still wouldn’t be able to afford a one bedroom apartment by myself, unless I want to live somewhere gross like the inland empire.
Buying a home in a beach accessible city is impossible unless you have a budget of $800,000 or more. In fact, if you don’t make at least 6 figures, you’re either going to have to live inland, have roommates indefinitely, or live in a really rundown, possibly dangerous area.

No. 393440

LOCKING IMMINENT

Thread has exceeded 1200 posts and is about to be locked! Please create a new thread and post a link to it.


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No. 391276[Reply]

What would you say is the best thing you learned as as a woman that you would tell another woman? What do you wish someone told you earlier?

Can be a word of wisdom from a woman in your life, a piece of media, a band, anything that moved you or you learned to be true

Just nothing detailed about killing men I think we all know about that.

For instance:
Be fully conscious about the feelings someone gives you and make sure you really want them in your life.
46 posts and 6 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 393236

Stay away from the self-conscious types, it spreads. If your friend is publicly ashamed about her nose, you will be about yours too in no time.

No. 393240

>>393236
This applies to insecure men too. Don’t date men who constantly nitpick themselves and self hate all the time.

No. 393254

>>391483
/thread.

No. 393331

>>393254
lmfao vavav-vased.

No. 393375

Nonnies tonight I bring you a beautiful song that I found made by a stunning woman.

Lyrics
Opportunity knockin'
A nigga was out for coffee
Inadequate like my window
The Grammy's is way too lofty
And I could stay here forever
I could die here
I don't have to try here
Can I get my two sugars please?
Jesus made an album
I'm still waiting in the line for cream
She dream in techni-color
Live black and white
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