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File: 1634005238002.png (290.8 KB, 600x738, touko.png)

No. 209130

Let's talk weddings.

>What does your ideal wedding look like?

>Share ideas here: Colors, themes, dresses, rings, venues and general inspiration.
>If you're getting married, what are you planning and how is it going?
>Any stories of weddings gone wrong (or right)?
>This is not a thread for hating on weddings/marriage.

No. 209134

File: 1634006853057.png (93.39 KB, 564x846, setup.png)

>What does your ideal wedding look like?
Something quiet and whimsical with just a few close family members. Ceremony in abandoned chapel in the woods, followed by a nice little gathering outside with fireflies everywhere and a string quartet playing. I want an intimate/peaceful vibe with minimal dancing. Just have enough drinks where people can comfortably mingle, maybe around a fire.

Unfortunately I don't think I can have this, because both our families are large. Fiance's family loves their loud explosive parties. No one would think my vision is "fun" and they're probably right.

It's definitely bullshit when people say "It's YOUR day, do what YOU want", they never fucking mean it. The minute you involve other people, you become a host, and it isn't an option to not plan for what your guests would enjoy. Especially if they're traveling far to show up for you. So, it almost feels pointless to plan for what I want. My mother will overtake it all anyways.

No. 209142

My ideal wedding: none

But if I ever do, I hope it's small, short, and just an excuse to eat yummy food. I also have a type of dress in my mind, but I would try and find the cheapest version of it. I would also prepare some written stuff about how much I love my partner so everyone cries with me as I say it. I might even prepare a videographer for this lol.

No. 209170

File: 1634035849242.jpg (1.06 MB, 2500x2500, IMG_5846 2.JPG)

I'd like to have a casual wedding outside in nature. Only close friends and family members would be invited and for dinner we'd have a bbq potluck sort of thing where everyone can just grab whatever they want to eat all evening. There'd be a bonfire and some good music and people would just dance and drink and chill.

Also there would be a ton of fairy lights because I'm basic like that.

No. 209196

File: 1634049282368.png (597.85 KB, 1834x2620, mermaid.png)

Seriously fuck these stupid dresses, I'm so unbelievably tired of them. No one looks good in these unless they're extremely skinny, otherwise you just look like a sausage sticking out of a cake

I can't find any good traditional longsleeved dresses anymore. Everything either looks like picrel or "boho" shit

No. 209198

File: 1634049928607.jpeg (204.67 KB, 1200x800, 3022B5C6-0DF1-4784-94B0-7A1484…)

Hard agree they look whack and not to mention incredibly uncomfortable to walk/eat/try and piss in

My ideal wedding is probably something chill (I’d rather elope personally but for cultural reasons I’ll probably be obligated to have a ceremony kek). Picrel looks so serene and beautiful- just a short ceremony and maybe a nice barbecue after with a tea length dress.

No. 209214

I hope mine is fairy themed. Like projectors that put sparkles on a forest floor, and incense, fake rose lights. And then mushroom stew, blossoming tea and rose cake. I say 'ew Scotland' to annoy my Scottish mother, but I hope to get married in Scotland. It's so pretty it makes my spirit feel lifted up when I go there.

Fairylights make me hnnghhhh

I bet it would be so nice with the ocean in the background going woooshhh all oceany and that and then maybe there's live music like a live symphony to go along with the ocean's crashing. And then afterwards you could jump in the sea in your dress. And ice cream too. That would be a fun wedding, and the beach doesn't cost as much as a venue.

No. 209219

I'm never going to get married but if I did I would have had one like serial killer couples do, when there's no ceremony or party and it's only the couple and the witnesses to sign the papers kek. I've never been too keen on big celebrations and I don't get along with my extended family, I would feel completely alienated at my supposed own party.

No. 209220

File: 1634063775331.png (112.87 KB, 600x900, 43253.png)

I've always wanted a Beauty and the Beast style wedding, childish as it is. Gothic architecture/artwork, stained glass, waltzing at the reception, dark dramatic table setting. Sigh.

This won't happen because I live in Texas where every venue is either a sterile corporate hotel, a country club, or a fucking barn.

Also, expecting people to waltz is pretty unrealistic

No. 209221

File: 1634064054149.jpg (105.69 KB, 600x901, 16-amy-terry-and-basil-mavrole…)

If I had the money, I'd shamelessly copy every detail on this wedding, seems so fun

No. 209223

File: 1634064170548.jpg (97.22 KB, 476x720, bc29694a121f156654ab66ca048090…)

The thought of a traditional wedding gives me so much anxiety. Most of my family are really toxic and the thought of "my side" being near empty with all his friends and family in attendance, I can just imagine them thinking something must really be wrong with me, and I would absolutely have a panic attack. Letting my family attend would be even worse because they're racist and we're an interracial couple. I wish it were different but that's just the hand I was dealt. Fortunately my partner doesn't want a ceremony either because he doesn't like being the center of attention, so we are planning to skip the ceremony altogether and go straight to the honeymoon! I still want to dress up to take photos at some point during our honeymoon vacation visiting one of the countries on our bucket list. Even though I won't have a ceremony I'm really looking forward to being married. I'm still on the fence if I want to go with the white/ish gown or his family's cultural attire for our photos. The latter (picrel) is my partner's preference, but even though I like it and his family has also been pushing for me to wear it, I'm worried I'll look like an insensitive retard because I'm white. Thoughts? The photos are mainly for us and them so I think it's ok but am I crazy for thinking that? Not bait I promise. I know twitter would lose it but I don't give two fucks about them, I'm just confused about where the line is drawn in real life. I don't want to make the wrong choice and offend the people I love over a dress I'll be wearing for like an hour.

No. 209224

Hi I totally understand your frustrations. My fiance is Hispanic while I come from a white southern family. My mother literally just wants us to have a destination wedding so that his family wouldn't be able to attend and mix with our side. It's a fucked up situation and I still don't know what we're going to do yet. I'd rather elope but he wants a wedding…

As for your dilemna: If HIS family is wanting you to dress in their traditional attire, it isn't insensitive! I'd even take it as a huge compliment on their part that they accept you enough to involve you in their culture. At the same time however, I definitely understand feeling out of place. If it makes YOU uncomfortable, you should talk to your fiance about it. Perhaps there is some kind of middle ground/compromise where you involve some of their traditions, but not all of them.

No. 209225

That does look stupidly fun, but lol, every time I see these lavish weddings I internally bet $5 the couple divorced in 2 years

No. 209226

Nta but I had a super cheap wedding and our marriage lasted just short of 2 years. At least we didn't go into debt for such a short marriage I guess lol. I know people whose debt lasted longer than they did.

No. 209228

File: 1634067604620.jpg (111.49 KB, 736x1104, a571ce3625cd61a3009cc0309183d7…)

I have always loved wedding dresses, especially those big, poofy, off shoulder/sleeveless ball gown types. But the ceremony itself seems like my biggest nightmare. I'd much rather just elope and travel around the world for the "honeymoon".

No. 209231

not cute

No. 209232

My aunt has been married twice. Her first marriage, she had her "dream wedding" and she absolutely loved it. They divorced a year later. Her second marriage, which lasted until death, the wedding was much smaller and modest.

To this day she considers her first wedding as the happiest day of her life even though the marriage itself was unsuccessful. It's weird but she seemingly has no regrets about it and loved having her day exactly as she planned.

No. 209233

File: 1634069834147.png (320.33 KB, 1140x1710, dress3.png)

I feel this. I love the AESTHETICS of a wedding. Dress, rings, music, atmosphere. Hell, I actually love the idea of the ceremony, with a beautiful church and reverence surrounding the occasion.

What I hate is the concept of the RECEPTION. Because then everything you want gets thrown out the window for the sake of playing host to a bunch of people you don't actually care to see.

I just want to wear a beautiful dress, say my vows and maybe go out with some close family members to a nice dinner afterwards. Not make my parents go into debt for some massive shindig

No. 209234

I respect this at least. It's stupid when a couple spends $50,000+ on some ridiculous spectacle only to realize later that it was all bullshit. It's a sad joke

No. 209250

I got married during covid and it was the best decision for my husband and I. we didn't have to invite people we didn't want there and we had the best excuse: covid. it was really small, quick, and private, in a beautiful church too. it was just like a normal wedding with everyone dressed formally, plus a cake and food, but just way smaller and no reception.

No. 209259

I have no idea what I want to do for my wedding. It's so ridiculously expensive. I've heard in the US the average cost of a weeding is $30,000. All that money on one single day. I'd rather go on multiple vacations with that amount.

I thought longsleeved dresses are making a comeback. I feel like I've seen a few brides get married who had long sleeves. Well, I can only think of two off the top of my head, but I feel like I've seen more.

I hate the idea of a beach wedding because I'd be forever anxious the weather would be bad.

No. 209262

that sounds very nice anon. i would honestly like to do this too

No. 209298

File: 1634107396642.jpg (1.39 MB, 4320x3240, F2WWKEYHE7DAMQR.jpg)

I wish I could have a wedding ceremony, but I can't. My family is not functional. I can't even drink to escape their shit because I'm already pregnant.

If I don't invite my parents, I would need to hire security guards to make sure my mother will not attempt to intrude the venue.

We are planning to have a civil marriage with no church involved. We would make the rings ourselves, maybe something like picrel. Then maybe have a small gathering with friends.

No. 209315

I'm getting married in November and I'm super fucking nervous. Up until we booked in the date I was fine, but then the fact that people will be focusing on me for an extended period of time and other (arguably minor) worries sunk in. The other day we met with a dance instructor to practice our first dance (I have two left feet) and I had my first panic attack in over two years and also ended up vomiting. I do not do well at all with social anxiety and it turns me into a total sped so I'm trying to focus on the many positives: it's a beautiful setting in the woods and is literally our dream outdoors setting, I'm marrying the woman I love who's my best friend, I'll get to see my wonderful stepmother and beautiful sisters as my bridesmaids, the caterers we hired are fucking amazing, I love my suit, it's a great reunion with those I care the most about after covid. The pros far outweigh the cons and yet all I do is focus on the fucking cons! They're not even that bad: the attention on me, the fact I'll definitely cry the second I see my fiancée and blubber my way through the vows, having to be social all day and keep the 'tism under control. The worst thing will be having to play nice with my fiancée's stepmother who seems to dislike me but even that is just a small detail in the big picture. I don't suppose there's any married nonnies here who can give me a few tips on how to chill the fuck out about it?

No. 209320

In the end all that remains are (mostly posed) pictures. Like weddings are made out to be amazingly important, but apart from the pictures I don't even remember much from mine (10 years ago).

No. 209323

That's actually quite helpful, thanks. So long as I don't have a full blown panic attack or vomit in front of anyone it probably won't be anything too out of the ordinary for a wedding; I mean even in the worst case scenario where my fiancée's stepmother is rude to me or makes a scene that's still kinda normal for a wedding (or any other family gathering tbh). All I gotta do is compose myself for the photos and things should be fine.

No. 209325

nona I was a nervous wreck the day I got married. I threw up the morning of my wedding. I could not keep food down and was shaking the entire time I was getting my hair and makeup done. I wasn't going to drink but decided to have a mimosa or two to calm me down which REALLY helped. the fact that people would be staring at me made me really nervous too, I've always had body issues and i was dreading being photographed, filmed, etc. once I actually got to the venue though, it all went away and the marriage itself flew by. it was a traditional christian ceremony and was like 45 min long kek but it was fine. my husband seemed more nervous than me at that point. just really try to enjoy it because it truly goes by so fast! I'm certain you will be fine.

No. 209361

Congratulations and I'm sorry it's not what you wanted. Remember that by the time you have your first anniversary, you won't really care much what the wedding was like, only that it happened.

No. 209388

Where do you like to browse realistically priced wedding dresses? I’m engaged and overwhelmed by the price of the results just googling stuff like “embroidered wedding dress”. Is it possible to drop less than $1000 on a nice dress?

No. 209588

If I were you? I'd visit some bridal shops and try on a variety of dresses to get a feel for what actually looks good. Then I'd find something similar and cheaper on Etsy (cliche I know).

No. 209602

File: 1634335148181.png (1.1 MB, 742x1036, Screen Shot 2021-10-15 at 5.54…)

This is the wedding dress I want, I love the champagne.

No. 209626

wow that's pretty and very unique!

No. 210357

Recently I got engaged and my fiance was surprised that I was clueless about what I wanted for a wedding. The reason is, my mother is extremely painful to deal with, and she'd overtake everything if we let her pay for it. Unfortunately, we don't have the money for a big event we'd want, and we're not interested in having a long engagement to save up.

We've decided a middle ground that makes me happy. We'll do a micro-ceremony with only our closest, and a fancy restaurant dinner instead of a traditional reception. I'm letting mother pay for this, because in such a downsized wedding, there will be less things we would butt heads on. (I'd still pay for dress though, because there's no way our tastes are going to align)

Post-marriage, we'd save up for some kind of badass vow renewal where we do whatever the hell WE want without family pressure.

No. 210405

Tbh him proposing and then your mother footing the bill for a day that's not even what you want… it sounds like you're needlessly rushing into something when all the signs are telling you to slow down and let this guy prove himself and provide your actual preferred wedding day where you are in charge and your mom isn't out of pocket. I've alway found that when friends had small, rushed weddings and the brides side was even paying for the small event… I've just never seen it amount to anything good. It's a bad sign when you can't wait.. and he can't provide.

No. 210581

File: 1634939605449.jpg (271.86 KB, 750x1000, J0uWbLGoKGoc13u57Hp2uTsIkNYSQB…)

I've already decided on my venue lol. it's this local alleyway-turned-park that's cute as heck. Not sure if the reception will be there, but I definitely want to get married there

But we're also going to Vegas in January and we've talked about how it's possible we'd get hitched while on our trip, since it would be cute, funny and would bypass all the wedding fuss. Playing it by ear!

No. 224390

File: 1642469293690.jpeg (30.81 KB, 564x410, 2634146cc3dbdd069d54d6b5d6c598…)

It seems that now that Americans are getting used to living in a pandemic a lot of my friends who were holding off their engagements are getting married. I'm in my late 20s so a wedding surge was bound to happen eventually.

Me and my partner of 7 years have been talking more about having a wedding in the abstract, of course I already have a pinterest board in the works- I just wish we had more money or it was more affordable to have a nice wedding.

I don't want to be the only person in my extended family to elope/I wouldn't want them to feel insulted or that they weren't important to me. But me and my bf both have large extended families and venues in our city charge anywhere from $75-100 a plate.

I don't feel like I need an expensive wedding and I can be thrifty in a lot of aspects, but the guest list is such a pain in the ass.

Right now I'm thinking of a courthouse wedding and a reception for friends and family maybe a year or so later.

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