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/g/ - girl talk

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No. 391276

What would you say is the best thing you learned as as a woman that you would tell another woman? What do you wish someone told you earlier?

Can be a word of wisdom from a woman in your life, a piece of media, a band, anything that moved you or you learned to be true

Just nothing detailed about killing men I think we all know about that.

For instance:
Be fully conscious about the feelings someone gives you and make sure you really want them in your life.

No. 391278

Crushes that feel overwhelming and cause anxiety is your brain’s way of saying “don’t do it”.

No. 391287

Don't hang out with crazies because they'll make you crazy too. Wish I knew it sooner

No. 391288

Don't move in permanently with a guy before marrying him. Marriage is the only thing that makes moids try.

No. 391292

whatever you think you deserve, you deserve 3 times better.

No. 391293

Never prioritize a moid's wants, needs, or feelings before your own. NEVER. Your empathypilled brain is going to tell you to do it but don't. He would never do the same for you.

No. 391297

Decenter men from your life as much as possible and focus on your education and career first and foremost. Keep men at an armslength. If you do not have your own financial safety while in a relationship with a man, expect that if things go south then you're going to be in trouble without a good support system. Prioritize other women in your life. Whatever career you seek, always gun for the highest paid position. Discipline yourself. Buy a vibrator. Don't watch porn. Not every woman is going to be your friend, avoid women that prioritize their boyfriends and male friends over you. This all sounds harsh. Be picky with whoever you fuck, be suspicious of every man's intentions.

No. 391298

Love on your features even if they're not popular now. Your significance isn't determined by how you look.

No. 391299

After watching my ultra religious grandma suffer through a marriage with a cold inconsiderate moid who left her to do literally everything for the household for 60 years, even she tells me it’s not worth it in the end and to not make the same mistake she did. Seeing the regret in her eyes and hearing it in her words is so sad.

No. 391335

Agreed, learned this the hard way.

No. 391386

It's normal not to feel instant attraction for anyone.

No. 391389

Please trust your gut intuition about men. Don't try to rationalize or downplay your feelings. If a guy is doing or saying something weird, it's not 'cause he's quirky or naive. He is putting out the vibes he wants to put out and knows what is inappropriate and what isn't. I have gained almost nothing from dissuading myself about my gut feelings. I am saying this for myself as much as for others: it doesn't matter if a man thinks you're frigid, paranoid, or "lying" to him when you reduce contact after uncomfortable behavior. Society teaches women to sacrifice their comfort and safety for a man's ego. Don't do it. If you are safe enough not to comply, don't! I ache for all the times I was scared to be perceived badly and sacrificed my well-being for malicious men. Stay safe and unbothered!

No. 391393

Learn to harness your anger in ways to reach your goals. Angry that all the art around you sucks? Make some great art out of spite. Hate your job? Find a better job and promise yourself that you will leave your boss a bad Glassdoor review. Angry at how others treat you? Get angry and assert your boundaries.
Your anger is your protection too, don't let it destroy your softness but harness it to make the world around you amazing, even though a negative emotion.

No. 391478

Get a hobby and try your best to master that craft as much as possible. Network with others within your hobby. If you're ever upset by moid nonsense remember they need you more than you need them and their chimpery is nothing short of a cope. Make sure you're hydrated, use an spf moisturizer to prevent skin cancer, reject beauty standards. Makeup is retarded, don't waste your money on it. Most brands have toxic chemicals in them that are directly applied to sensitive areas near mucus membranes.

No. 391482

> spf moisturizer
shit advice, use an actual spf product.

No. 391483

If he wanted to he would

No. 391488

Be very skeptical of anyone using shame, guilt or trying to appeal to your emotions and kindness to get you to do anything. Especially the first two. Always, always look at what's in it for you first. Even if it's family. Oh you're a bad girlfriend/daughter/bringing shame on the family for not sacrificing yourself for everyone else's benefit? Okay, be selfish then. So what? This goes doubly if it's something they would never expect a son to do. Think real hard why it's never sons caring for parents in their old age.

Second but no less important is that you deserve better than someone else's sloppy seconds. This means taken men, single dads, older men who have slept around and try to entice younger girls by promising them the moon. You will get hurt and used and have to pay for therapy for years while they just walk away and get to do it to someone else. Being someone's dirty secret leaves you in a perfect position to be abused. You deserve someone who treats you like you're precious and genuinely cares for you, or better yet you can be that for yourself by making your own money, making good friends and creating your dream life.
Basically what >>391293 said.

No. 391498

Learn to stop giving so many fucks, especially when it comes to moids. Don't waste any time on people who don't like you. Not everyone is gonna like you and that's okay, they don't have to like you anymore than you need to like them even if they're women. You don't need anyone else's validation. No matter what your parents say you're worth alot more than you think.

No. 391501

You're beautiful the way you are. Stop wasting money and time on skincare and make-up. Make healthy choices. Diet and exercise will do more for your appearance than any lab created cream or lotion ever will.
Let yourself feel emotions, no matter what they are. You're in control of how you feel, but emotions are natural. It's okay to be sad, angry, upset, jealous, etc. Everyone has felt like that multiple times and you're not alone. Know that if you are feeling bad, this feeling won't last forever.
Moids are stupid. Sex is fun, but have it on your own terms. Make sure the man is treating you exactly how you want before you give him what he wants sexually - no excuses.

No. 391502

Be as forgiving to other women as possible and be as critical of men as possible. Have strong female friendships, stand up for women you don't even know if men criticize them, display sympathy, empathy, and compassion for the women around you. All women are traumatized and hurt in one way or another, give them chances the way no other woman or man would. Be loud, confrontative, open, honest. Stop playing into the socialization game and feminine rituals. Stop shaving every inch of your body, stop wearing makeup, stop wasting time and money and effort on shit men would never even think once about. Prioritize health and muscle. Take a self defense class. Respect yourself. Love yourself. Stay vigilant.

No. 391511

Fucking THIS. I learned it the hard way too.

No. 391518

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Body neutrality, develop mental hobbies, READ, nurture female friendships, male validation has literal no worth and be aware of the profic incentive there is to keep you insecure.

No. 391543

File: 1713215946703.png (317.29 KB, 750x370, 1698609191276.png)

cool pic
..um.. why is everything bout looks? buy guns ladies–I should have done that a decade ago tbh.
not implying u should kill anyone k?

No. 391544

i think you should be implying that actually.

No. 391545

imma luver not a fighter

No. 391601

Time really does fix most hurt. Even some of the most insane things, you won't remember why they hurt so much years down the line. Just keep moving,

No. 391689

Financial independence was a gift given to us by our grandmothers. Never rely on someone else's money, especially not a moid's. Open a lifetime ISA or a SIPP. Invest wisely.

No. 391706

There's absolutely nothing wrong with celibacy or singleness and you shouldn't force yourself to be in a relationship just for the sake of it.

No. 391749

Be like the thread pic. Put the phone down, go out and touch grass, let the sun warm your skin, and enjoy the sounds of nature (or the city) around you, maybe read a book or journal while you're at it. Taking some alone time when you can to recharge and enjoy the small things life has to offer is crucial for your wellbeing. No moids, no retarded social media shit, no pressure to consume the next hot thing, it's just you existing.

No. 391917

Why did she pick the mood to begin with?
Was it arranged?

No. 392128

stroke your own hair and kiss your own hand. thank yourself for cooking and cleaning. be grateful to yourself for even the smallest of tasks

No. 392228

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I would like to let thread nonnies know how much I love checking on new posts here. Your advice is precious and I love your perspective. I've been putting many of these posts in my advice collection journal to remember and repeat on good and not-so-good days.

No. 392246

Same–keep em' coming.

No. 392327

I do think you can choose to be happy and to love life. I used to struggle a lot with being controlled by my emotions and waiting around for my life to get good. but it didn’t start being like that until I started working to make it that way. it’s hard at first, but it gets easier all the time. the sky is blue and beautiful and here I am. that makes me happy, and suddenly so do the sidewalks and the roads and the streetlights, even when they’re not turned on. they’ve got little stories in them. once you start seeing the little bits of people in every little thing, it gets a lot easier. life is about people and their stories and the way their stories poke their heads into yours. the ride never ends man. but we get to be in it with each other. the grass is beautiful and so is the person in front of me in line and so is everyone all the time. life is how you look at it. I don’t know. I’m sentimental and I’m really happy. there’s a couple with their dog outside my window and I love them with everything because that’s all life is and it’s all life will continue to be. the story never ends.

No. 392335

this sounds kinda crazy but everyone should try it because it's actually really nice and reminded me what it feels like to be appreciated.

No. 392883

Beautiful perspective, thank you.

No. 392885

File: 1713812970335.jpg (232.48 KB, 1368x967, Eh-d2LOXYAESZL3 (2023_07_11 05…)

The dream life you have in your head, are you doing things to get there?
Even if it doesn’t seem realistic to try sometimes, it is.
Even if you’ve failed before, you’re smarter now.
You imagining that yourself could be happy living a life that you really want… it’s not a thought, thats a vision into what you deserve.
And you fucking deserve it

No. 392983

File: 1713846998696.gif (222.64 KB, 400x478, e99b87423d5415c396f5c0d8301166…)

Practicing positive self talk has made such a difference in my life. If any of you are like me, having a very negative and critical self voice in your head, where putting yourself down has become an automatic reflex….Please try it. Encourage and cheer yourself on to do things, be proud of yourself when you do them. Soothe yourself when you're upset like a caretaker would. Interrupt a negative thought and refute it with a positive one. It might feel strange at first, but you could try creating a persona in your head to be that positive voice. Or imagine your favorite character saying it to you.

It sounds silly but when I'm overstimulated and panicking, or so depressed I'm unable to move…I close my eyes and imagine myself taking care of a cute little kitty-type creature. The kitty represents my emotional state, maybe she's crying out or shaking in fear. I imagine myself petting her or coaxing her to drink some water/eat, and then I mirror those actions in real life.

No. 392988

>It might feel strange at first, but you could try creating a persona in your head to be that positive voice. Or imagine your favorite character saying it to you.

Thank you for your advice nonna. I want to try this but I would feel like pixielocks if I did…

No. 393001

Stop caring about others’ opinions of you.

No. 393010

The longer you stay single the less you want to accommodate a partner.

No. 393017

>Practicing positive self talk has made such a difference in my life.
Me too! Fake it until you make it, one day you end up meaning the words for real.
>I want to try this but I would feel like pixielocks if I did…
kek just don't pretend it's a real other person living in your head. Imagine there's a person/character next to you encouraging you instead.

And in the same spirit: if you keep saying, thinking, writing "I'm crazy", "I'm a lost cause", "I suck", you are actively harming yourself and causing yourself to act worse. You really do become what you tell yourself you are. Being positive literally makes cancer treatment more effective, and being negative makes it less effective and more likely the patient dies.

No. 393034

File: 1713878915618.jpg (11.4 KB, 275x208, 1651650493437.jpg)

I second this! Resetting my default way of thinking from extremely negative self talk to kindness and appreciation for myself has changed everything for me. No matter what happens in my life now I don't ever question my character or my self worth anymore.

It's so uncomfortable to make the change in the way you speak to yourself, I found it embarrassing to like myself, like it was just vanity and that was wrong. but after a little while it became natural and I can't believe I was ever so cruel to myself. we get to be in this body once and no matter what we do we cannot change that so we may as well love and cherish ourselves. why would we not?

No. 393087


No. 393230

You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. You can spend all the time and energy in the world trying to "save" them, but unless they want you to or ask you to, it will be in vain.

No. 393232

Is there any way to force myself into positive self talk? My default inner voice is so incredibly negative it’s exhausting and it’s become the only way I can really think.

No. 393235

ntayrt but you just have to force it. Just focus on the words first and not what they mean, write out some short sentences that you want to believe about yourself and just speak them out loud, get used to how it feels in your mouth. Then look in the mirror and say them. Then try to feel what the words mean. It will take some time, and it won't feel like anything is happening for a while but it's so worth investing some energy into

No. 393236

Stay away from the self-conscious types, it spreads. If your friend is publicly ashamed about her nose, you will be about yours too in no time.

No. 393240

This applies to insecure men too. Don’t date men who constantly nitpick themselves and self hate all the time.

No. 393254


No. 393331

lmfao vavav-vased.

No. 393375

Nonnies tonight I bring you a beautiful song that I found made by a stunning woman.

Opportunity knockin'
A nigga was out for coffee
Inadequate like my window
The Grammy's is way too lofty
And I could stay here forever
I could die here
I don't have to try here
Can I get my two sugars please?
Jesus made an album
I'm still waiting in the line for cream
She dream in techni-color
Live black and white
Opportunity knockin'
A nigga just got her nails done
Skeletons in my closet gone open the door when Yale come
They ain't gonna wanna see my silhouette rap
He's fucking cognac
My smile in all black
Mississippi vagabond
Granny gone turn up in her grave
And say, my granny really was a slave for this
All your uncompleted similes and pages ripped
You know they whipped us niggas
How you afraid to rap it
You went to heaven after so we could free them now
Ain't no ocean floor when you can be a yeezus now
Don't fear the light
That dwells deep within
You are powerful
Beyond what you imagine
Just let your light glow
Seventeen moments and cloudy days on my snap
Mysterious aberration, illuminated the trap
My telefone-calications synonymous with the sunrise
Mountains against the foreground forever me coming back
I ain't gonna cry
The last time Ali marched Chicago
Twenty four and a late mojo teaching me how to drive
Whole world inside my rear view
This feel in me so alive
This feel in me so alive
Enjoy the joyride
Opportunity knockin'
It's finally time to answer
The doorbell was only broken 'cause auntie was fighting cancer
Cigarettes on my mantle keep callin' me by my first name
Loving me when I'm lonely
Pretending they really Noname
Don't fear the light
That dwells deep within
You are powerful
Beyond what you imagine
Just let your light glow
And when that call comes
(You better say hello)
You better say hello, no hesitation
(You better, yeah)
No hiding deep down below
No beg your pardon
(You better stay and grow)
You better stay and grow your liberation
(You better, yeah)
For your lonely soul
Or you'll be on your own

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