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No. 57313
I know that feel, but now I go out every few days. And holy fuck this is actually better than any antidepressant I tried. I know you won't believe me quite and think that your situation is different, but I have been there.
It started because I wanted to get food a bit cheaper, so I can save more money. I found out that the Uni in my city has a Cafeteria, and the food there is incredibly cheap for students.
So I'm not a student, but thought fuck it, I'll just give it a try. And it happens that they actually don't ask for any kind of ID card, because during lunchtime it's just so full that it's a waste of time. So I get a warm meal and dessert that taste totally fine and a small bottle of some drink for around 4 bucks.
Now the thing is, I go out almost everyday for this, walk up the hill on the Uni. (It's actually a hike for around 30min, because I don't want to risk getting caught that I dodged paying the fare), have my favourite music blasting on my headphones, and get a bit of sun.
And after a meal, you can sit around campus and read a book or play on your phone in the sun. Literally no one gives a shit. No one looked at me ever or even talked to me. It's great.
But I'm sure that if you're active you can even make friends there, many people sit around alone there.
Really the walking, the sun it all helps so much.
Today even, as I walked home there was a van from the hospital asking people to donate blood. As I was bored anyways, I did. A little bit of not so bad small talk and filling out a paper. Didn't even hurt and they handed me a chocolate and a 5 bucks credit note for a nearby cafe, so I even got a piece of cake and coffee for free afterwards.
I know you're afraid. But force yourself into the shower, put on something else besides a pajama and do it. It's just one day. Even if it is shit, it's just one short day and you can abort mission anytime. Trust me girls, this didn't "heal" my depression but for damn hell it's better than any stuff a doc has ever prescribed to me. And along with meds, it's just finally feeling good again.
Seriously, that feeling. It just randomly happened, as I was standing at traintracks, the sun shined on my face and I heard a bird sing.
I thought I might have eaten something wrong or I was drunk or something. Then I realized. It was that I was feeling good. I think I didn't have this feeling for like years. Be comfortable with being outside and alone, without having to do anything. Just do it.
No. 57318
>>57317I'm so incredibly glad that it does. I really hope that other girls here might feel that, too.
I would be so proud if I could help at least one of you to feel better. You are all deserving of this.
No. 57322
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>>57319Don't beat yourself up over it so much. You should start slowly, take babysteps. When you go to the pool, you don't jump right into it dry. You put a foot first, wait till your comfortable etc.
And workout is really hard and doesn't feel good at all at the beginning, so let yourself have time with that.
You know what's way better for your health and overall wellbeing than staying in bed? Taking a walk. That is exercise already. A softer one. You're active, you get fresh air, you move your muscles and all that.
And your main goal right now should be to find out what helps you with soothing your depression. Because only when this isn't the main problem you'll have the energy to reach any goal you truly want.
Keep in mind, that you have all the time in the world. The only thing important is that you feel well, and there's no pressure behind this.
Maybe make it like a quest, find out where there might be a forest nearby, and take a notebook with you. Perhaps you've seen funny looking mushrooms or have seen a couple of horses and watched them for a while. Keep a journal about your exploring tours and you have a document that you can be proud about that you actually achieved something. Or if you live in a urban area, walk all the way to a local museum or library (both things are basically free btw) and make it a goal to go there and learn something, like anything. And write all your experiences down. No matter how boring it is. For example I did it, there's only a boat museum nearby. So I read through the description and holy hell, there's a shitton of boat-types.
And always remember who you are doing this for: you. So your future self can be at peace, and we know that this girl really deserves to be happy.
No. 57324
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I was "forced" out of NEETdom late last year when my mother passed away and I had to move because I couldn't afford to live in our home. I have no other family or friends to help me, so I was really just thrown into adulthood headfirst in my late 20's.
It sucks and suicide has been on my mind a lot the past 6 months, but nonetheless, I've accomplished a lot on my own so far. I got my first job ever last month at a hotel, have my own apartment, and will be going to college next year hopefully.
I can say that these are the things that have helped me the most, coming from someone whose had depression and anxiety for almost 15 years and has tried to commit sudoku before.
1. Making up a schedule/to-do list, no matter how small
2. Eating healthier/avoiding a lot of junk food
3. Going outside, even if it's just to sit on the patio for 5 minutes
4. Picking up a hobby to avoid just browsing imageboards all day
5. Bathing + clean clothes every day
Everyone always recommends exercise, but it's kind of hit or miss for me. Having responsibilities/goals is much more helpful for me, even if my only goal for the day is to make dinner. Just take it slow, pat yourself on the back often (even for small things!), and work on improving yourself day by day. Also, don't beat yourself up about things.
Remember: Everyone makes mistakes or struggles, you have to go at your own pace, and it's never too late to accomplish whatever you want.
No. 57330
>>57290It is still taking me a lot of effort to get up and awake every day but stuff that works for me as a college student:
>Open window to let the air/sun come through, even if you're just going to crawl back into bed afterwards>Do legitimate stretches, even if you won't be exercising>Shove yourself in a colder-than-normal shower>Put on clothes besides pajamas, even if you're not going out>Drink ice water all day (I have ice water along with my coffee everyday)>If you can work outside, go outside>Walk around a lot if you're starting to feel tired at your desk>Stay in the sunlight/brightness>Powernaps are ok and your workmanship will be better after one than it would be w/o one>Take breaks from sit-down work to do an active chore (clean something)>To-Do Lists>If it's possible, make your room as warm as your bed so that you're not tempted to lie under the warm covers foreverChange your lives my friends
No. 57963
>>57955Yeah, I agree completely with this.
People don't consider that diet can often be directly linked to mood, I get massively depressed if I ingest lactose regularly for example (fine if I just have it sometimes, like a glass of milk a week or whatever).
Another big part of getting up is making sure you actually sleep. Sounds retarded, I know, but if I only sleep 5 hours or so, I just don't want to get up, I want to stay and sleep. If I get 9 hours, getting up is no real issue, takes a bit of time, but it's better.
This works if you have hypersomnia as well I find, or any disorder that leads to excessive sleeping. Waking yourself up at the right time in that cycle (and coffee) helped me a lot when I was sleeping 14 hours + a day due to mental illness. If I let myself sleep straight through that full period where I'd had 11 hours already, I'd just keep sleeping when I woke up, feel shitty because I overslept and then just want to sleep more.
I found that making myself miserable for a week or so by forcing those cycles really helped me a lot in the long term, because it just became natural and fine after a bit.
Though any tips from anyone about how to keep healthier sleep cycles with painkillers would be much appreciated, I'm on oxycodone at the moment while waiting for a surgery, and my sleep is just fucked, same with keeping myself to a schedule. I kind of stop giving a shit when on it, and don't go to bed when I need to, and end up miserable the next day. Does anyone have any experience or tips that might help with this?
No. 57964
>>57931Yeah, most artists are working incredibly hard and I guess you're mostly doing drawings or digital work or you couldn't sit in bed all day. I don't know where you get the idea that all artists are NEET, it's bullshit.
As >>57961 said, networking etc. is a huge part. No one at my art school is a NEET, even though mental illnesses are above average in our province.
>>57324Late reply, but good job. Looks like you're getting there!
No. 57965
>>57931>Artist>NEETHopefully you mean digital illustrator or comic book artist or something, because most artists need to spend a lot of time networking and showing face
You're going to get fat and even more depressed from unhealthy sleep patterns, isolation and lack of sunlight. The advice given up in this thread is really important, don't passively sabotage yourself. There's nothing cool about being NEET.
I've realized that regular hours (whether it's work/volunteer or just studying in a library like other anons suggest), exercise, balanced diet and iron supplements are all really important. As are making your sleep patterns regular and limiting internet use.
Sleep is my favorite thing in the world and I hate exercise, but if I indulge myself in that then I rapidly turn into depressed mush. Babysteps are the key, but this trend of making crying instagram stories whilst taking selfcare bubblebaths for a whole day instead of making any effort is a cancer.
No. 59054
File: 1493234785525.png (198.66 KB, 360x362, 14727620956530.png)
I've been inactive for so long that I get body aches like an old lady. Being an hikki is suffering.
Maybe I should start by doing some simple exercises in my room. I welcome any suggestions.
Also, hang in there, fellow farmNEETs. Things can get better, I suppose.
No. 59099
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I just wanted to suggest something to you guys that I saw someone else mention on lolcow.
It's this app called OurHome that helps you keep track of chores/to-do's and rewards for chores completed. It's family/kid oriented, but it's really cute and super customizable.
It's given me a little motivation to be productive, despite being depressed and wanting to stay in bed all day. Here are some examples of things I've added on mine.
*Doing the dishes - 20 points
*Taking the trash out - 5 points
*Do one load of laundry - 20 points
*Vacuum - 15 points
Some of my rewards are small things worth less than 100 points while some are a lot higher, like 1,000-2,000 points, because they cost more or are a bigger deal. The rewards system really works for me, because I often treat myself like shit and don't think I deserve anything, so it just helps remind me how hard I'm working.
No. 59101
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>>59097>do you need any equipment for CC?Not that anon, but I installed this app (
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=johnwu.ca.convictconditioning2) to look at the exercises and it does require a pullup bar, which I also don't have… You could always do a similar exercise instead, I think.
And thanks for that link. I'll try those exercises first and work my way up to CC or something.
>>59099Anon, that's great, thanks for sharing. I'm using a similar app called Habitica. It's so cool cause it's like a life RPG, pixel art and everything.
You're right, it is kinda motivating.
No. 59155
Currently I'm trying to motivate myself to eat healthier and go to the gym.
I just can't find an app that I really like for it. So far the best I found was Fitocracy because it gives you points for your work outs and levels you up. But it's ugly and the app is a little hard to use. I wonder if anyone knows about a similar app?
>>59101I love habitica too, it's nice and motivating.
> tfw not really a NEET but I prefer to stay in my room most of the time No. 59192
>>59125I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I also suffer from depression and anxiety, and even though I've done therapy and I take meds since 2012 I still haven't found the right ones for me. Depression is especially hard to treat; some medications have made me worse than I was before. Hopefully things will change in the near future, as there have been some good findings in this area (
https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2017/4/4/15073652/precision-psychiatry-depression)
As for anxiety, I used to have social anxiety and let me tell you CBT does wonders (Alprazolam also helps). I mostly have generalized anxiety nowadays. So I believe you can get better too, it just takes time and a lot of work from you and your therapist.
It sucks you don't have access to free counseling. I don't live in the US so I can't really advice you in that matter.
Have you tried working online? That way you could earn some money and find a good therapist/psychiatrist. You guys have loads of online work opportunities in the US, like MTurk. It doesn't take any special skills or qualifications and you don't have to deal directly with anyone.
I've been trying to find online jobs myself, but it seems there isn't much to do in Europe…
Let me know if you need help regarding online work or something else.
>>59155For eating healthier (and losing weight), I started counting calories. MyFitnessPal is the best app for that, as far as I can tell. You don't have to focus on weightloss, just set a realistic calorie goal and track your meals. When you start learning the amount of calories, sugar, salt, etc, you take, you get more conscious about your eating habits and hopefully then you get motivated to change your diet. At least this worked for me.
As for workout app, I have no idea, I'd like to know a good one too.
> tfw not really a NEET but I prefer to stay in my room most of the time It's okay. When I wasn't a NEET I rarely got out of my room as well, except for classes. Some people are just homebodies.
No. 59222
tbh getting a steady boyfriend put my life into perspective, I can't just sit in bed or in front of the computer and not take care of myself, especially if I want to one day raise a family/cook/clean for them. So I started waking up early before class to a basic beauty regimen but keeping it simple for now while in school.
Even if you don't have a bf, it can be motivation to improve your looks/life skills. I wake up early to clean my room, do dishes, and study. I've never felt more productive than getting up early, honestly.
Also, phone addiction made me procrastinate like crazy, so I removed Safari and most time-wasting apps. Now I just text, snapchat and call friends and fam.
And lastly, if you're a massive weeaboo, listening to some upbeat weeb jams can really brighten your mood. Try checking out places like 8tracks or youtube for plasylists of songs you like, and wake up and start playing music. Immediately gets me pumped and motivated.
good luck to y'all, this thread has a lot of good ideas
No. 59224
>>59155>>59192If you have the money get a garmin/fitbit, it's REALLY motivating and fun to use
If not, here are a few app suggestions:
Yoga: FitStar Yoga, DownDog & Yoga studio
Regular workouts: Popsugar active - you can make your own challanges and there are a lot of workouts, they also keep updating the app frequently, 100% recommended, at least for home workouts
Sworkit is alright, there is also Nike training club
As for running: c25k and zombies, run!
No. 59244
>>59192i very much appreciate your reply, thank you.
i hope you find the right medication for you!
i do actually work on mturk, but it's only really helpful for a little spending money, definitely not something that would help with medical bills. i've done hits on there for roughly 2 or 3 years and have made less than $500 altogether. i'm sure if i focused all my time on it, i could make more. but i lack the motivation to keep up with anything consistently. i have also done other online jobs that make considerably more, but not enough to save up for future costs. uninsured medical bills and medication in america can be very expensive. if i have money, i'm more likely to spend it on urgent matters like bills or groceries, and put mental health care on the back burner. it's a frustrating way to live.
but i digress. thank you again for your response. and i wish you luck with your job search!
No. 61454
>>61448Personally I just finished school and have severe mental issues that I've spent my entire life obsessively working on yet do not go away/years of the wrong medication have fucked me up. So after I managed to graduate I don't have that same distraction/illusion of stability through being present at an institution, so things have been crashing. Childhood abuse lead to abusive relationships and I had to cut everyone off. In a weird transition stage, and I'm assuming for everyone else it's a crushed self of self and lack of ambition. Probably a giant self esteem issue, but you can't know what you don't know, so again I'm assuming a lot of us just have a lack of behavioral knowledge or a history of success to attempt to repeat.
>>61205I struggle with almost the same thing haha, I have commissions to do and truly do not care no matter how much legitimate attention I've gotten for my work. If you can though try doing small 'warm up' drawings and post them somewhere, most obvious instagram, and the positive feedback should motivate you. For me usually once I start something small I tend to reunite with why I love it pretty quickly and move from the 'warm up' to the actual commission.
You should also try listening to an NLP recording from Michael J. Emery, he has two really good ones about procrastination and applying anger. It's really about shifting your perspective and how you think about things, and it may seem dumb at first but it actually does truly help. From my understanding I procrastinate from obsessive thinking about something else, and if I take a break from that thinking to do something else then something bad will happen - this helps you let go of the other thoughts and gives you some separation/mental freedom. I hope that makes sense.
And thank you for posting about your yoga experience, a psychiatrist recommended it to me and I admittedly scoffed thinking it wouldn't be enough to help. I'll have to try it.
Would you mind expanding on your experience during inpatient/outpatient? I'm not sure what you went for specifically, but I've had issues with being chronically suicidal and was recommended to try it. The idea of it scares me a little, so I'd love to hear more if you have a moment.
No. 63149
>>63024I think that's a very common problem among NEETs. I never knew what I wanted to do with my life. To be honest, I don't have nothing to live for, but I won't kill myself for the sake of my family. So now I'm stuck in this limbo.
When I finished highschool I just chose a uni course that seemed good enough (also because my teachers recommended it to me). Dropped out after a year cause my depression was getting way too bad. 4 years later, I enrolled again. I dropped out again last December. I don't see myself getting into college anytime soon, or any time at all.
I wish I could help you and give you some good advice. Unfortunately I haven't found an answer yet. I think about this issue every single day and of course it makes me extremely anxious. I really, really want to find something I can be at least a little bit passionate about.
I get it why not getting that job affected you a lot. I'd probably react the same way. But try to think that it was
one job, I'm sure you'll find lots of new opportunities in the future. Hey, at least you're a college graduate! Keep trying, don't give up! I hope you find something that makes you happy.
If you don't mind me asking, what did you study at college?
No. 63171
>>63155
Damn, it's like you just wrote about me.
I was always one of the top students, everyone always thought I'd go far… But I never felt like achieving anything.
I can't help but compare myself to others as well, especially to my highschool "friends", who I avoid at all costs too. They have jobs now, boyfriends, they go out, travel, socialize… I don't even want all of that, all I want is stable income so I can live comfortably and not bother my family. But even getting a shitty part-time job flipping burgers is near impossible where I live. Plus, I don't think I could handle such a job again. I worked retail for a while and it drove me completely nuts.
Without a university diploma, you're pretty much screwed here. One of the very few exceptions is IT, as long as you have a decent portfolio. So I've been thinking of learning some coding and other Computer Science stuff. It's actually an area I was interested in a long time ago, before I turned into a mess. Hopefully it will spark some interest in me.
>I actually don't mind being a NEET as it's comfy and suits my nature, but it is incredibly boring sometimes and not achieving anything makes me feel like crap because I feel like I have to live up to societial and social expectations. I pretty much avoid everyone as I'm ashamed of myself.
How relatable ;_;
Anon, the volunteering idea sounds very good! When I dropped out the first time, I volunteered for about 6 months at the local library. It was pretty comfy, and it actually motivated me to get out of bed, at least. Do you like kids? If you do, you could try volunteering at a daycare or something, or maybe get a few babysitter gigs. You say you're very empathetic, so I think their heartwarming nature could uplift your mood. Just a suggestion…
About finding direction, maybe a therapist could help you with that. I went to a new therapist last week and that's actually one of the main issues I want to work on with her.
I realize my posts sound whiny and the kind of shit you'd read on the old NEET threads on /jp/. It's just I don't talk about this with anyone, and I feel like at least people in this thread will try to understand me.
No. 63188
File: 1497669230586.jpg (116.47 KB, 1024x768, 000_3844.jpg)
>>57292I'm seriously considering doing this, but id probably just lie on the floor instead
Im even getting acne under my chin b/c I'm always like
< this
No. 63295
>>63149Aw, thank you so much <3 I'm doing a lot better now.
I majored in English, which I wanted to do from the start! The problem is people always think you want to teach. My advisors constantly said you can get almost any job with an English degree, but I never see people want that specifically unless it has to do with writing. I focused more on creative writing, though, and in an ideal world I'd like to do that but I'm too lazy and scared of rejection :(
No. 63313
>>63295I studied English too! My plan was to become a translator, but it's an area that requires so much work, reading and keeping up with news… It's too much for me. Yeah, usually language students are pushed to become teachers.
Have you thought of doing something like exposure therapy in order to overcome your fear of rejection? Like setting a goal and publish your writings in a public blog?
>>63297Thank you, kind anon (^-^)
Fortunately, I'm not suicidal all the time. I have really bad phases throughout the year, mostly when the seasons change, and I'm pretty "neutral" for the rest of the time. In the last few days I've been feeling better, which is a great change.
No. 74152
>>59099I downloaded this and I really enjoy trying to do as many chores one after the other as I can. Also helps me feel like I have accomplished something and pace my day out better.
I can’t think of any rewards though. I guess doing nothing in bed is what I really want :/
No. 75169
File: 1518821508823.jpg (301.69 KB, 1024x676, 1511833391430.jpg)
>>73744>love thy bedthis one is for you
you are an honorary montenegrin
No. 75420
>>75411I wish I had any art skills so I could do that. I probably would like working from home. If it helps, you’re already way more successful than some other people (such as me).
But to you and anyone else reading this thread, good luck with whatever you’re doing.
No. 313453
File: 1676836288934.jpg (21.75 KB, 640x355, d8b7dcc5d17937182221fd990c0068…)
I have a major problem wasting my time in bed when I have nothing to do that day. As much as I hatred my early morning job I did have to force myself up and get going so that made me at least a bit productive. though some days I'd sleep in and not bother showing up because I was late anyway It's been worse for me in the wintertime because I don't have great heating and I am so cold waking up I don't even want to touch the floors or get out of the covers. What do you nonnies that live in cold places do to get up when it's freezing?