/g/ - girl talk

Not on talking terms with my ex, thank god. We also met online and live in different countries so I don't have to ever run into him again.

Didn't end my last relationship in good terms at all. My ex was an abusive asshole and cheated on me as well, so yeah, good riddance. He's from another state (it was an LDR, never again), so I don't have to see his fucking face ever again, HOWEVER.. He does eventually come to my city (because it's a big metropolis, he lives at a smaller, beach city) and although the city is fucking huge, we'd probably go to the same places downtown because of our similiar hobbies. Whenever I see someone even remotely similiar to him I do have a small heart attack. I even thought I saw him once while walking around with my current boyfriend and asked him to fucking flee from the place lol My ex tried contacting me this year through a common friend, no idea wtf he wanted but yeah, >nope

pic not related.

My ex was emotionally stunted and we were in a LDR for all of our relationship and only saw each other for a month at a time every 6 to 9 months. I was also a self-pitying asshole during the last year of being together so it made for a pretty shitty dynamic. We were together for 3.5 years and broke up officially over a year ago. Unfortunately I feel as though I am still hung up over despite going completely no contact since the break up. I would check on him a lot because it was so easy to through social media. I didn't really see much until a month ago where I saw he had a new girlfriend. That gave me a nice handful of emotions. His new GF is basically just reminded me of myself if I was a successful normie without all the mental problems, so jealousy was there obviously. I got over my jealous feelings and now I am just bitter since I don't think he deserves to be happy. I don't even know why. He did some shitty things while we were together but so did I. He wasn't super terrible so I'm not sure why I'm so bitter about it. I started dating my current boyfriend only a month or two after the breakup so I was thinking maybe my so called rebound chose to bite me in the ass a year later? It still doesn't make sense to me why I am so hung up on him even though we haven't talked one bit since we broke up. It's frustrating since I know he doesn't think about me and I don't want to think about him anymore either. WHEW. I really needed to rant.

>>68803
It's okay, let it out. I'm still hung up on this guy I was talking to. He wanted a relationship, but eventually changed his mind and ghosted me. I found out a few days ago that he's been dating some fat koreaboo, fuck.

My only ex and I only dated for a couple of months. He was somewhat emotionally unavailable but I got too attached easily because of my shit self-esteem. Looking back, our dynamic wasn't the healthiest and a breaking point would have been reached eventually.

I haven't talked to him for months now. Unfortunately, I'm still hung up over the guy since he wasn't some totally abusive asshole and was also the first person I ever got romantically involved with. Working on myself more right now so that I can genuinely feel nothing towards him some time in the future.

>>68818
To add onto this, it was an LDR too. I didn't initially see a long-term future with him thinking that those kinds of relationships could never last long. But then he started talking about visiting me and going on dates if we ever met. My feelings for him ended up getting more serious before he decided to end it abruptly. I'm trying my best to get over it and I'm glad he had the heart to not string me along, but I still have all of these dumb 'what if's left to deal with and the fact that we can't even really be friends again like we used to be.

How long does it usually take you guys to get over a guy? Especially if it ended badly.

I'm best friends with my ex. A lot of stuff happened in between, but I'm so glad we're friends now. We're also really different people than from when we started dating.

My boyfriend of 2+ years just broke up with me. We're "on good terms" but I'm honestly so fucking hurt I can't sleep, I can't eat, and I'm afraid to be alone.

He told me he has these urges to experience more while he's young, and that he loves me so much, which I believe because you can't take the way he cried and looked at me before I left, but that he loves me so much and the urges wont go away so he wants to "experience more" so that he never hurts me if his urges ever lead to him cheating on me.

He also said he wants to marry me and have babies with me still but that he wants to get this urge out of the way.

How am I supposed to deal with this, girls? How do I start to get better? And why, when i know he still loves me,would he do this?i couod use some advice….

Also sorry in advance if this is a mess, I'm on 2 hours of sleep and still might be drunk.

>>68901

You'll start to recover and you'll find someone better! Do not take him back, because that excuse about 'urges' is bullshit. He may really feel that way, but part of a relationship means that you get over it for love. I started dating my fiance when he was still in college, and at first he was worried he'd feel like he was missing out on something, but he got over it and stepped up. I think people forget that relationships have compromise and sacrifice for a reason. It's called devotion, and him putting you on back burner so he can go out and 'suppress his urges' is bullshit. If he has to do this now, who's to say he won't just want to do it again? And if you get married he can't.

>>68822
After breaking up with my last bf (we were together about a year) it took me probably about a month and a half. The week after I was such a wreck and so sad, and that's always the worst part, and once I get over that it just gets easier because life goes on

>>68901
He doesn't love you, if he loved you he would know that all pussy is the same, but love isn't. He just want you as a fallback option.

DONT TAKE HIM BACK IF HE CHANGES HIS MIND

>>68901
>He also said he wants to marry me and have babies with me still but that he wants to get this urge out of the way.

meaning he wants to sleep around with other women and only come back to you when he's ready to settle if he's not found anyone else. ask yourself how do you think he would respond if you told him you wanted to experience other men and come back to him in a while. lol these manipulative men are getting so transparent

>>68901
Don't ever take him back. He's scum.
If someone needs to experience other people before they want to settle down with you or be with you, then they are not right for you.

I suggest you delete him off all social media so you don't have to be reminded of him as much, delete all pictures of the two of you together, as well as all photos you have of him. Same with all messages on your phone and etc.
This makes it easier to move on. If he wants to stay friends or talk, tell him you need time to get over your feelings for him.
I would not recommend staying friends.

>>68901
Anon who got dumped for a koreaboo here.

It was really tough in the beginning. It'll slowly get better. That guy is a piece of shit and you should never take him back. He just wants to sleep around. If he really loved you he wouldn't be doing this.

It'll be tempting if he ever comes crawling back, but you need to reject him. You can do MUCH better.