/g/ - girl talk

Most of the vloggers I watch are my age or even older (and even some are cows themselves) - Taylor R, Sharla, Kim Dao, OshareGirl, ThaTaylaa, SasakiAsahi, Wayne Goss. I'm in my mid 20s.

Why don't you feel like you have nothing to look forward to? I have things to look forward to in my job (promotions, raises, new projects) or relationship, and I save money to look forward to things like traveling or a big purchase. There's always still big steps to look forward to in life, such as buying a home, if that interests you.

>>77069
I'm almost 30 and I can definitely say I'm feeling pretty garbage on social media especially lately. As if the things I like are only meant for people under my age so I feel embarrassed to even want to think about said things.
I feel like the world is only meant for (younger) people who are "better than average" in whatever they do and the world has no time for an mediocre, aging piece of trash like me. I've never accomplished anything and I never will, especially with the world being so focused on younger people these days.

I'm only 22, but still looking forward to what others are going to post here, since i'm mighty scared of getting older…

As a teen (and kpop worshipper) my favourite youtuber was https://www.youtube.com/user/beautifymeeh. Later she got kids and a lot of her videos involved her husband, so i kind of lost interest.
But i'm sure that i'll turn back to her once i'll get older and want to adopt a more mature style. She's 31 now and absolutely gorgeous.

>>77074
I get what she means anon, Sharla and Co. might be in their 30s, but certainly don't dress it. So if you're a woman of that age living outside of Japan/Korea and/or working a normal job, you might feel uncomfortable or that it's no longer appropriate, e.g. pic related.

Misako Aoki will turn 36 this year and is still the cutest lolita ever

Honestly I think this just speaks to a deep hopelessness and cultural malaise. I know that in many metrics the world is getting better but in terms of individual outlook many, many people are pessimistic. While I love catching up with friends it too often ends up being depressing. People are worried about unabated rising house and rental costs, they can't look forward to ever being homeowners. They are worried about their jobs getting outsourced or automated and many see scant potential to move up the career ladder so they can't look forward to that. They don't look forward to having kids because they rightfully worry about affording them. A lot of people complain about how Japanese media is overly youth focused but this is often explained as being reflective of how crappy being a working Japanese adult can be. A large chunk of media pop culture has always been youth focused but maybe it seems more prevalent now as reflective of a deeper dissatisfaction with adult working life, like Japanese pop media.

>>77082
>While I love catching up with friends it too often ends up being depressing.
I'm still in college, but already feel like this. Whenever i meet up with friends (which is quite rare) we end up only talking about how all classes suck, how shitty our grades are and of course how scared we are of having to graduate because we've got no idea whether we're ever going to land a nice job and how the hell we're supposed to pay rent on our own or even afford to buy a house.
Everything seems so exhaustingly impossible, there's really nothing one can look forward to…
On top of that comes the pressure of old people telling you that they were already married when they were your age and i'm sure later when i'm older the question "When will you have kids?"

My mother always told me that your student days are the best in your life and slowly i start to realize how right she was…

I’m 26 this year and feel like the Internet is the future… but I’m already too old for it. Social media annoys me, most industries are being swallowed up by it. It seriously makes me want to move to a forest and just go fully off-grid, because I’ll never be anything in an online world.

I’m turning 26 next month. I guess the most adult thing I’m doing right now is selling off a ton of my old weebstuff, books, games pretty much everything from my teenage years that I never look at anymore. I probably have another year left at community college and then I’ll blast off somewhere.

I remember reading a post on here an anon made about things getting a lot better in older age and after that I’ve been feeling more positive about my future.

>>77081
she look really young though, anon, most of us won't look like that at 36

>>77069
Lolita and gyaru comms in my area have plenty of members age 25-30, and there are a ton of cosplayers/con-goers who are in their 30s. You just don't notice until you're that age as well.

>>77097
VR is the future, the internet ain't old and busted yet but it has lost a lot of its charm.

>>77152
Agreed. You don’t age that much from 20 to 30 and even to 40. It’s perimenopause and menopause that really kickstarts the aging process in most women. Luckily our diet and self care is a lot better than it used to be so even then, it’s not too bad. Be of good cheer, anons. If you take care of yourselves you might only granny out at around fifty.

I’m 26. Tbh I’m loving it. I’m watching my savings grow. I can afford more interesting hobbies. I’m starting to get a clearer picture of what’s next for me career-wise. I know how to take care of myself better with each passing year- mentally, physically and emotionally. It makes me feel super attractive and confident, which has a great feedback loop. Because of that, I’m participating in things I wouldn’t have dreamed when I was 16 or 18 or 22.

The downside is that I’ve noticed a few physical health problems come up, but I’m sort of glad in some respects because it’s forced me to start taking good care of myself while I’m still pretty young.

Another downside (sort of) is that people are starting to settle down, and there’s some pressure to do that now. I’m not ready yet, though, and I’ve found the women in the same boat as me are better friends than the women I was meeting before. Because we have way more in common.

Oh! And it’s finally cool to care. It’s cool to try. It’s cool to challenge yourself. It’s cool to want to succeed.

>>77081
I love that she's 36 and still rocking lolita. Especially in a society like Japan that acts as if Women expire at 25. I think Aoki is adorable.

>>77299
that's china you utter retard. japan has been recently embracing singles to try to bolster their economy. japan doesn't believe in christmas cakes.

>>77097
So many jobs now a days require you to be careful on your social media. it's bullshit. I'm turning 32 this year and i feel as if i've seen it all with the internet. (I haven't.. haha)

I'm just kind of nervous about using my twitter or facebook sometimes in case a boss or coworker finds it. I try to use aliases but everything is connected to your phone number and two of my coworkers have already found my fb through that.

I am looking forward to my 30s. i am enjoying it so far. I don't feel super disconnected yet.

I grew up watching Angry video game nerd's channel and Jenna marbles. Glad Jenna is still around.

>>77300
Actually, i'm fairly certainly both countries do find women of a certain age undesirable, but sure. Japan is obsessed with youth. Look at their pop groups and jr idols.

>>77300
>you utter retard
I'm not even the post you're referring to, but this thread is called "Older farmers", yet you're still behaving like some 13-year-old edgelord…

>>77301
There are apps you can download now that allow ou to have two phone numbers on one device, one for work and one for social stuff. That way ou wont have to tie the number you give to your employer to your online activity.

It's kinda silly but when I was trying to get in shape, femshepard helped me stay motivated (I like to imagine her as a buff lady). I mean we have this badass 30-ish protagonist kicking ass left and right, who wouldn't want to be like her?

>>77079

I'm in a very similar boat to you. Almost 30 and starting to feel more and more disconnected every year.

Not to mention I've lost so many friends recently despite being much less of an obnoxious bitch compared to when I first met a lot of them. I have a ways to go when it comes to really becoming the person I want to be, but I've managed to get more of a handle on my mental illnesses and learned to keep negative shit off social media. It's really disheartening to just suddenly lose a good chunk of the people you talked to regularly and have little to no social life.

>>77355
All Shepard is one of the coolest characters ever. The interrupts from 2 are awesome with her.

I'm 26, and married, but my husband and I are living abroad so it doesn't quite feel like we've truly settled down. We've got a dog, but we don't want kids, so most people probably think we are "still starting out."

The only downside is that socializing has grown more and more taxing. I only miss a handful of people back in my home country, so it's not that. It's just hard to find time to hang out with interesting people, and the people I meet that have a ton of free time just aren't worth the exertion of going out.

Thank you for making this thread OP, seeing that there are a few other people in the same boat is helping immensely on a very depressing day.

I’m about to turn 28 and can’t relate / enjoy almost anything in fandom anymore. Used to actually enjoy anime and now I can’t get into any of it because it reminds me of how old and irrelevant I am (except Yuri on ice , mostly because the characters are at least adults and not high school kids, but then I get depressed again over having accomplished far less, etc )

Either way I definitely miss fandom back in the 2004-2013 years or so, but I doubt fannish spaces were all that better as much as I was just in a far better place in life.

I can’t make any friends in any of my few fandoms because they are all too young to relate to anymore and I can’t make friends IRL because I work with 45-55 year olds with families , while lovely, again can’t relate to me (single , poor, still living with my parents)

Although I’m probably just more immature than I should be at this age. Sorry for the tangent. I’m very stuck on feeling like I’ve wasted all my good years and youth centered media absolutely compounds it.

>>77079
I'm feeling this post a lot.

I'm 28 and I really feel like I'm falling behind. The society around us glorifies girls aged 16 to 22 and treats anything beyond that as useless. Even 25-year olds are considered "mature women" when they're barely out of college. I look almost exactly the same I did when I was 20 as do most women my age, but when people hear my age it seems to make them uncomfortable. It's stupid because I don't really miss being young because I was financially broke, didn't know what to do with my life and extremely insecure about everything. Now I have a job with a stable, good salary, I know what I want to do and I've matured enough to stand on my own two feet.

But still any form of entertainment seems to cater to people younger than me so I feel left out. And socially people my age seem to be more occupied with their relationship than meeting people. I'm single so I'm only left with my few occasionally single friends who I know will dump me when they find a new boyfriend. But whenever I'm hanging around with people my age I feel a lot more self-confident because we understand each other and we're not occupied with shallow teen problems. It just goes on to show you that you really need like-minded people around you to feel happy.

>>77082
>A large chunk of media pop culture has always been youth focused but maybe it seems more prevalent now as reflective of a deeper dissatisfaction with adult working life, like Japanese pop media.
I honestly think that's why our generation is being pandered to with nostalgia a lot. People are so uncertain of their futures that they'd rather sink into reminiscing about youth because they associate their childhood with safety and happiness.

>>77504
>Used to actually enjoy anime and now I can’t get into any of it because it reminds me of how old and irrelevant I am (except Yuri on ice , mostly because the characters are at least adults and not high school kids
I'm still a massive fucking weeb but this hit home anon, I find myself not invested as much anymore because I really don't feel like watching teenagers do teenage stuff. Or actually, a 40+ person reimagining what teenagers do. I wish more media focused on people my age.

>>77550
Dude are you me? I am also 28 and look about 21-23 and work in a retail job where I am isolated from the younger girls who work on the registers. They are all really cliquey and at first they seemed really interested in hanging out ect but then they found out I was 28 and they act…different.

Does anybody else have the problem that their family constantly calls them old?
When my parents get asked how old i am, they always add a year.
When i ask them why, they say 'yeah, you're gonna be that age in a few months', even if it's still over half a year.

My mother is very insecure about her age, so as soon as i turned 20 she started calling me an old lady.
Her cousin is like 7/8 years older than me and they always say i don't look any younger than her.
(She also has the weird perception that a girl can't date a guy who's her age or younger, he should be always older…)

My friends say i look completely normal and some people even thought i'm younger, but my parents always telling me how old i look hurts me to no end…

I worked hard to escape poverty in a shitty country. At 19 I was ugly with a shitty bowlcut I did myself, wore used clothes from the 70s as it was the only thing I could afford at the thrift shop at the time, couldn't afford makeup or skincare, could barely afford to have internet.
I'm now almost 25, can afford decent clothing and food, live by myself, can afford good skincare and the odd filler where needed, have 2 degrees and a relatively bright future. Most people in my country are still in college at this time, but my early 20s were spent sitting at home and studying.

I later dated a guy who had sex from 15 and throughout his teens, and even though that's considered normal I found it so hard to imagine what it's like to have the 'normal' experience and have people be attracted to you, date around and 'have fun' before settling down etc. All I ever did was work and worry about money.

I feel like I've wasted my years. If only I wasn't born in total squalor and had a chance to be a normal teenager, maybe I wouldn't be so autistic today. I feel like I missed the fun bus and am now stuck doing everything the hard way, always and forever, because I lost the life lottery and have to forever apply for visas in order to work and live in a functional society and work twice as hard for things other people get for free, because the place I was born in is corrupt to fuck and you can't get a job unless you have money or connections (I'm working class, have neither).

I don't feel left out since I never felt 'in' to begin with. Most people don't really think about me, don't even know where I'm from or what I've been through, most things never apply to me since I'm too white and privileged for certain benefits but not white and privileged enough for others. Idk what to think.

I've never been approached since I've been told I always look sour and tired (I am) and I'm not a stereotypical hot girl so people don't really bother to look past that. I look okay I guess, but there's lots of girls who dress better and are prettier than me. Catcalling, being hit on etc aren't really a thing here and I don't have money to drink and go to bars so god knows where I rank on the attractiveness scale or if I'm already expired goods.

>>77552
My mother does the same exact thing ! I definitely know she’s very depressed about her age (to be fair she’s 77, I’m an adoptee so I can understand) but she’s been ripping me about being old and calling me 30, even though I won’t turn 28 till August. Ironically a lot of women say their thirties were their best years (still good looking but now with stable money situations) so I’m really hoping that’s true.
Anyway, your mom sounds very “misery loves company” and I’m sorry she speaks that way to you.

I suppose she probably feels women should date older men because men always want younger women so you might as well? A guy in his thirties will date an eighteen year old in a heartbeat. They could care less if they have anything in common or she has gotten anywhere in life; fresher pussy is pretty much the only concern. I’m probably irrelevant at 27 so I’ll go date some 45 year old geezer. Men could care less what you’ve accomplished. They only care if your tits point in the right direction.

>>77550
Damn it’s not even just anime, either. I guess there’s at least Friends / Himym. Broad city and girls are just kinda trashy imho.

Living in a dump of a city really doesn’t help. DO NOT STAY IN YOUR HOMETOWN AFTER COLLEGE. After community college I should have gone straight to university but I fell for the distance education meme. Now I doubt I’ll ever get out.

>>77565
>I later dated a guy who had sex from 15 and throughout his teens, and even though that's considered normal I found it so hard to imagine what it's like to have the 'normal' experience and have people be attracted to you, date around and 'have fun' before settling down etc.

This is me with my boyfriend. I sometimes get annoyed when he reminisces about the past and a certain glow comes to his eyes where you can tell he really misses it. Meanwhile my life is only just now good and continuing to get better.

But for every bit of jealousy I feel, I also remind myself there’s no reason to be sad. He’s the one who will have to feel sad when he feels like he is missing something. I get to be happy because I see an upward trend!

It’s all about perspective, anonette.

As much as the guy you dated may have enjoyed the moments in his past, none of it was very sustainable was it? Those friends and hookups just disappear with time. Especially as they start to settle down.

You made a good investment given your circumstances.

>>77578
>he reminisces about the past and a certain glow comes to his eyes where you can tell he really misses it. Meanwhile my life is only just now good and continuing to get better.

Not the anon you're replying to, but I hate this shit. My last relationship ended because he realized he was getting older and he missed being wild. Meanwhile I've only had him, so he'd always look down on me, saying that I "lack experience" so I don't know shit.

I'm the same age as you, faggot. I've worked hard all in my life, been poor everyday, walked life with no family while your mommy does your taxes at age 24.

Get done with normal, anons. Get somebody you like that knows the meaning of hard work and more important things than fucking cookie-cutter hot broads. I've seen married couples that aren't traditionally good looking and they're so fucking happy and I'm so fucking jealous and happy for them. 25 here also, thought I was too old but honestly we've got a lot of years left to find a boo.

I'm glad there are some others a who I can relate to in this. I'm 28 and I'm former teen mom. I had to grow up too fast and I find myself so bitter and resentful. I didn't get to be a young adult/teen and now I'm old too! I know there is no one but myself to blame for my situation but it sucks so fucking much.

>>77576
Seems like our moms are like your typical lolcow farmer, calling Taylor R 30 when she's just about to turn 27, same with June.
Mine is not even 50 yet, but it feels like she's been complaining about looking 'so old', since i can remember.

I know that it shouldn't bother me to be called older when i'm not even 30 yet, but with my fucked up self esteem and nowadays society, it feels like youth is more important than ever…
Might sound stupid, but Kylie Jenner was 'hot' when she was 17, but now she's 20 and has already settled down with a child.

Being a weeb certainly doesn't help either, when every adult aged character is ever a mother or a melon boobed slut; being cute it seems, is only possible as long as you're still in high school…

>>77504
>>77550
Can I join your 28ish club? I'm turning 28 this May and I have pretty much the same feels.

My biggest worry is that I won't accomplish anything significant. By significant I mean anything that I value as important.

The fear of aging is also present but mostly due to the fear of failure and my mom.

My mother is so concerned of aging. She and some other older people told me the same thing, that you suddenly notice others treating you differently because of your age but you yourself still feel young (young as in a young adult), so not anyhow different from others.

I see my mom fighting this hopeless battle against time. She uses expensive beauty products, undergoes pricey laser treatments and practices a strict no-carb, low-cal sugarfree diet. She does all of that and she does look great for her age, regardless, you can still tell that she is 40+ (she's in her mid 50s).

I hope I won't be obsessed with looks like her. I know that it's easy for me to tell that now but I hope I will be able to reach peace with aging and try to not be so much under influence of our youth centered society.

I have to admit it sucks when I see an important person,actress, artist what have you that is younger than me and that has achieved a lot more than I could possibly dream of. And that happens a lot more than I would like.

>>77069
man I was looking for a place like this on lolcow seems like I am not alone on this. I am about to be 30 in a few days and I look back and regret so many things. I even had a chance to become a youtuber back in 2008 I had the connections (people that are no longer relevant right now) and I was pretty much in the prime age of becoming once since most youtubers are between 18 or early 20s. But I made very poor choices and burned a bunch of bridges.

Now I am this old hag with a shit minimum wage job (200 dlls a week) I had many chances put to me on the table but I screwed everything up. Now i have a few grey hairs on my head, my skin is not looking the best, I feel ugly, old and fat. Yeah I do agree with a lot of you here, this era these times if you're over 26 and dont have your shit figured out then you're basically a looser according to society.

I have these great video editing skills but they deem to be worthless, I had to move back with my parents because rent was too expensive for me to afford specially with a shit salary like mine. I sometimes wonder if killing myself would be the best solution for this? The worst of it all is that I went to college and got a degree but unemployment rates are at an all time high here so no one is hiring so I have to settle for minimum wage jobs. Honestly idk if its the times or what but most of us older people seem to not be able to get around or get many chances like the younger generations.

I dont know I probably sound like a whiney bitch but man this shit is depressing.

I am a useless hag at 29. I work two jobs, both $14 an hour (which is a shit wage in NY), 50 hrs a week. My boss is younger than me. I still live with my parents.
I've never been in a relationship before, a virgin, and I'm at the age where everyone is pairing up and getting married soon. I'll look like a creep if I approach anyone college aged, I have nothing in common with middle aged divorcees, and I don't want to date parents of any age, so I'll probably die alone at this rate.

I'm so glad I look ~21. When I get carded at stores, some cashiers are surprised that I was born in 1988. If I get a major opportunity, I'll lie about my age. Seriously.
There's more promise for women under 24 in society. Say what you will about the manosphere, but they're right about one thing, the wall is real.

>>77824
it's not so much the wall is real, it's just society has a really skewed view on age
also
>I'm a useless hag at 29
>I'm so glad I look 21 tho~

I mean ok, but which is it

>>77826
People have different expectations of 29 year olds and 21 years olds, regardless of how old they look.
It's normal for a 21 year old to be in my situation, while at 29 it's considered pathetic.
I might not look like a hag to some people, but I might as well be one tbh.

>>77829

Honestly if you look ~21 you have nothing to worry about. It's like you get an extra ten years to do all that shit. (I am the same, look a lot younger than my age).

Different people have different lifespans and ages of maturity. If you look ten years younger now it means you won't hit "the wall" until 40 which means another ten years to achieve the stuff. If you want to get younger guys you can, just put "24" as your age on a dating site/app. Most guys lie on there too so you'll meet somewhere in the middle.

>>77829
Then that's not "the wall", that is growing up.
You don't expect a six year old to sell you real estate and by 29 a lot of people usually have their shit together. The same (or at least similar) expectations are placed on men wrt work and starting a family.

I'm trying to get past the idea that my looks, particularly as I get older, have anything to do with happiness. It seems like really the happiest and most successful people who maintain that throughout their lives are not focused on looks at all. I want to stop hating my body for not being like an adored model and start just accepting it as the house for my brain and the tool through which I interact with the world, do what I love, travel, create art, make my dreams real. It's really difficult to fully get there when you're constantly drowned in the idea that fine lines under your eyes mean your value is diminishing, etc. As years go by I get more and more obsessive about skincare and wrinkle prevention. But I want to still someday really believe that those things mean pretty much nothing. I wonder if I should stop going on social media and gossip sites or just try to block out all the superficial areas because they're so harsh and so distanced from the real world and the highly imperfect but still-happy lives of normal people.

It's been kind of a satisfying journey to 30, despite my expectations of my life at 30 being severely curbed thanks to the ~~Recession~~

I don't find good stories in entertainment, ecelebs, whatever less entertaining because they're younger than me. You should be able to empathize with people across all ages. I just find, in particular with anime and video games, there's not much that appeals to me currently nor has there been for the past few years. I no longer have the desire to sit and play and RPG with a 60hr long story, maybe that will change, maybe not. I used to enjoy going to Cons and being involved in the community, but it's taken an unhealthy turn in recent years, and I feel like most of my good friends are now obsessing over being "relevant" while they turn around and tell social media "it's for fun! I do it for fun!". Clearly, not. Some of them were semi-famous back when /cgl/ was created on 4chan and they're having a real hard time staying on any real social radar. If you bring up anything about age, they freak out.

Cons were my social crutch for my anxiety for years, but now that I'm older, I find it way easier to socialize with normal people. There are other girls I wouldn't have dared speak to, just out of intimidation, and now I could not give a fuck. It's been great watching all those people who a following in High School and College kind of just boil down to their immediate family for attention…they didn't make it big, they didn't achieve MAX POTENTIAL JOB, they had a shot like everyone else. I've realized my normie friends are actually easier to be myself around, and way more dependable. Not that I didn't drink and party at cons, but I feel like I'm finally getting in the experience I should've had in college, only on the weekends.

I am only now feeling like my career is going in a better direction even though I'm not paid much at the moment. The skills are transferable, the work is enjoyable, and I still have time to do other things that are important to me.

There's not Chapters or Milestones in life, just a never-ending check-point of:
I am:
( ) a mess ( ) becoming less of a mess ( ) not a mess

I'm married but haven't lived alone with my husband in a long time because of financial circumstances. By summer, we should be set, but even then, it's important to ask myself:
- Why am I motivated to do this?
- Are the reasons I want to do this inherent reasons or was I told to judge the situation by x,y,z circumstances?
- What would be different if I did? What wouldn't?

I'm honestly a little worried for my other friends who aren't planning on having a family, just because I have no idea what they're going to do with themselves for another 10 years. We already party and travel so much, but this is it. I wish my con friends would get more involved with the con itself. They're all vets, so they could bring a real healthy injection of ideas to the scene.

Finding Happiness In Your Own Backyard, I think that's important and why I'm not as depressed or anxiety-consumed anymore. There are circumstances in my life now that are worse than at 20, but I can handle it on my own and can find joy in the small things accessible to me every day. I think it's important to just not be dormant or decide what expiration date you think people see on your forehead. They care much less than you think, and always have.

>>77870
See my problem is, I know looks don't matter that much for happiness, I know you're even likely to get happier as you get older, but I'm butthurt that by the time I sort out my neurotic bullshit my looks will be significantly reduced. I want to be hot and happy at the same time dammit. Youth is really wasted on the young and I don't find it beautiful or poignant. It's just obnoxious.

>>77668
>I sometimes wonder if killing myself would be the best solution for this?
God, please do not think that.

Remember that things change according to the point of view. If you think you are a mediocre and sad person, that will be what you will end up projecting towards others.

Do not expect another person irl to tell you what I am saying. You have skills that not everyone has with the editing of videos (that I would really like to have) and also you have a university degree, it's just up to you to see yourself as a "great product". I'm sure you're a beautiful person, but your thoughts prevent you from seeing yourself for what you are. Have a bit of self-esteem and improve your image, then you will see how things will change for the better.

>>77996
by the time you've reached all your goals and are happy you won't be concerned about your looks anymore though. People who live only through their looks live very sad pitiful lives

I was actually okay until I hit 26 this year. I guess that in my mind it's normal to be 25 or younger and still not have your shit together, but 26 is pushing it. I've never really known what I want to do professionally so I don't have a career and since graduating uni I've only ever worked random office jobs. My latest one was a bait-and-switch and they fired me when the girl I had replaced came back to the country.

Now I'm a 26 y.o. living at home, 1 friend (drifted apart from my high school/uni friends), (decent-looking but) never had a boyfriend, AND unemployed. I used to feel like having a full-time job was the only thing I had going for me, and now I don't even have that.

I try not to compare myself to others, but it's hard seeing these early-20s people around me who already seem so well-grounded. I've always been a late-bloomer, but I feel like it's getting ridiculous at this point.

>>78446
Samefag, but other than the career stuff, I find it helps a lot to find some older people you really admire and try not to immerse yourself ONLY in youth culture. You can still like that stuff, but it can't be your only point of reference in terms of what it is to be happy.

I used to only like kpop/jpop and the youth focus/narrow beauty standards really bummed me out as I got older, but I've since gotten really into classic rock and 80s/90s movies and I feel a lot happier having a more diverse viewpoint of life over 30 years old.

>>78448
Dita von Teese is a great lady to look up to in terms of being yourself and confident about it. The whole burlesque, lingerie etc schtick is not my thing at all but she always shows a lot of integrity, drive and professionalism whatever she does. She's also 45, so.

>>78450
>>78449
Oh my god what is wrong with me today

>>78451
Sorry, that was my fault! I deleted my first post to fix a spelling mistake.

I love seeing middle-aged women just doing their thing. Women don't have to hide away as they get older, I hate how many people think that way.

>>78449
>I find it helps a lot to find some older people you really admire

This is such great advice, anon.

Has anyone read this article?
Many People Taking Antidepressants Discover They Cannot Quit
Link:
https://mobile.nytimes.com/2018/04/07/health/antidepressants-withdrawal-prozac-cymbalta.html?action=click&contentCollection=Trending&module=Trending&pgtype=Article&region=Footer

What's interesting about this article is the following:
> White women over 45 account for about one-fifth of the adult population but account for 41 percent of antidepressant users, up from about 30 percent in 2000, the analysis found. Older white women account for 58 percent of those on antidepressants long term.

That's a stark contrast. I wonder what the reasons could be that such a huge percentage of women are on anti-depressants?

I've been dealing with depression for longer periods in my life (I'm in late 20s now), and I'm afraid that my depression will only worsen as I grow older. Reading negative things about anti-depressants only makes me more hesitant about getting any medical help.

It sucks when you don't live up to your own or society's expectations. It really hurts when you make compromises and lower your own bar so you could say "I'm fine with this" when a lot of my friends seem to be doing so swell. I feel like I'm the idiot. I work hard but I don't get anywhere, partly because of my low self esteem. I kind of hope that my depression will give me the courage to end it all in the near future. The world nowadays makes it look like if you're not under 25 years of age or if you don't have a stellar career that you're practically worthless.

>>78469
>I work hard but I don't get anywhere, partly because of my low self esteem. I kind of hope that my depression will give me the courage to end it all in the near future. The world nowadays makes it look like if you're not under 25 years of age or if you don't have a stellar career that you're practically worthless.

Holy shit, anon, I've had that exact experience and have thought the same thing.

I'm really afraid to approach a doctor about this, but I've been working up to it and think I probably will in the near future. I hope you will be able to as well.

I'm a 27 year old autist/aspie with no real life friends, and I've only been on 2-ish dates in my whole life. One was with a dude who turned out to be 19 years older than me. I felt almost violated in a way, thought he was just dumpy-looking.
My apartment always seems to be filthy, and while I have a decent job right now I'm sure the upcoming recession will buttfuck me into oblivion. And my closest online friend seems to be drifting away because they're too busy juggling meatspace matter.

>>78469
>I wonder what the reasons could be that such a huge percentage of women are on anti-depressants?
Women in general are more open to seeking professional help that may lead to anti-depressant prescriptions. Mental health care is much less stigmatized in the white community.

This might be an unpopular opinion, but I kind of think age is becoming meaningless. The reason 30 used to be considered "old" when we were kids is partially because people had children earlier, so that was an established "mom and dad" age. But now women often wait to have children and it's not like most of our generation is going to own a house anytime soon. Who really cares about how old anyone is unless it matters in a relationship?

I used to care so much about accomplishing something at a young age. Now I see that a lot of the media hype about the youngest X or the first Y is just that - hype. The parents peddle some story to newspapers for the publicity. Young media stars often have money or connections already. So be happy accomplishing what you can. There are bigger issues in life than being "old."

I say this as someone who turned 30 this year. I'm depressed and struggling to make it in my career (which is basically a masochistic choice of career - I regret not training to become a lawyer or doctor, as I certainly had the skills for those things). I am struggling with the sunk-cost fallacy but ultimately I want to finish what I started before jumping ship. I'm lucky to have a decent job while I'm finishing, but I dream of being 20 again & making different choices.

All of that said, I don't really focus on my age anymore. I can't change it. My biggest problem is that I still feel like a precocious 16 - not an established 30. I'm most comfortable when I'm new to a situation, when I'm learning something new. I am kind of an expert in a certain subfield but I'm scared every day of being wrong. Mental illness and physical consequences destroyed my life in my teens, so I probably never properly matured. I just deal with it the best I can. The question is what will I leave behind when I die (hopefully at a youngish age). Still working on that.

>>78828
Age confuses me. I dropped out of uni at 19 and started working a desk job, rented properties and got engaged young. when i was 22/23 and all my other friends were just establishing their career's after uni, i was wondering wtf was my life, was i stuck in my current industry until retirement which is going to be around 70s at this point? my partner also was out of work and had no drive or passion and our relationship had suffered.

i ended it and went back into education to open up more opportunities etc. i'm in my final year atm of a STEM degree i don't feel confident in. Being a mature student has put me out of touch with my own peers who are now having children and getting married. I've now been dating a guy for nearly 3 years, he has a son from when he was a teen to an older woman, this doesn't bother me as i come from a broken home etc. my boyfriend is very stable, good job and i feel like a joke next to him. he's currently saving for a deposit and looking to buy a house in June. I don't even work at the moment and unsure where I will be next year, so I don't feel like I can infringe on my boyfriend's life plans, he can set himself up now, but I feel like I'm always going to be playing catch up from here and I know it's daft but I do worry if he will want to wait for me to establish myself in a career and do the whole dad thing again or even get married. I'm also going to have to wait until 31+ at the earliest to have children. All my grandparents have died and a few aunts and uncles. My parent's generation all had kids younger and idk, I do not feel like an adult. I feel like a child and I'm losing all my role models.

I'm 27 and feel so out of my depth tbh. The uni kids treat me like I'm 40 and my own peers think of me as immature because I didn't have shit figured out.

OP mentioned not finding many channels dedicated to women in their 30s, but i'm interested in finding out what kind of topics you'd be interested in watching from someone in this age group?

I'm 36, and though it's not always smooth sailing, I feel pretty comfortable with my age now. If I had a way to make content geared towards ladies over 30 to help them feel better about themselves, i'd totally do it.

>>78982
Do you have any advice for feeling comfortable as your age? Or do you just stop caring after a while?

I wish I had more actual friends like you guys.

>>78983
Honestly a lot of it is definitely learning not to care. But it's also learning to focus on different things and giving up the idea that you can't do XYZ thing because you're over 30.

I've seen a lot of comments on this board akin to "She's almost 30! She should stop dressing like that!"
To which I say NO, she should not. She (and everyone else) should do exactly what makes them feel good, pretty, unique, whatever.
There will always be people who judge no matter what you do. So stop worrying about what is appropriate and what you SHOULD do and do whatever the hell you want to.

The old saying "age is just a number" may sound lame and cliché, but it has its value. I you spend time telling yourself you're old, then you will feel old.

Honestly these days I often forget my actual age. I mean, I know i'm in my 30s, but sometimes I'll be like "Oh, I'm 36 already?" Which sounds depressing, but really, as long as I don't FEEL old, then in my mind, I'm not.

I do most of the same things I did at 26. I have the same interests and hobbies. Only now, I have more money so I can travel more and do the things I couldn't afford to do in my 20s. So that is definitely something to look forward to.

I could go on forever, but TLDR; You really are only as old as you feel. You do you. Don't worry about anyone else.

>>79137
I agree. I really don't care whether people think I should wear or do X at 30. Most people don't even know how old I am.

It's always a delight to see an older woman (here I mean 55+) rocking something youthful: cool boots, interesting makeup, patterned tights, whatever. If I live that long, I hope I'm not afraid to live stylishly.

>>79209
if you're not afraid now, you never will be. the older you get the less shit you give about others because the more you realize they don't actually matter. it's a freeing feeling,

what kind of a sad person would come here past the age of 25 jfc

>>79211
I'm 29 and I only really come here on my downtime at work or when I can't sleep. Not sure why that's so sad.

>>79211
As if women stop being petty bitches at a certain age? There is no cutoff for bitchery

A lot of the cows are late twenties to mid thirties themselves

>>79217
People can easily come to lolcow for reasons other than being petty and bitchy. There's more thread topics than just cows and flakes, I'm here for general discussion about non gossip related things most of the time.

But anyway, I'm sure once that anon hits 25 she will realize you don't magically stop enjoying the things you always did at a certain age, and you're not necessarily going to be so busy living a busy grown up life that it prevents you from having down time to spend online.

>>79211
>Completely missing the point of this thread.
Don't worry anon, you'll be 25 one day too and maybe then you'll have to re-think some things.