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/g/ - girl talk

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No. 78397

Years of spending all my free time on the internet (especially on boards) has left me completely fucked up.

Of course, staying true to yourself is important, but in order to find friends, get a career, etc. fitting in is also necessary.
I just want to be a "basic" girl that takes care of her body without feeling the need to look like some anime chara or idol, that takes care of her skin normally, without worrying about shit like "nasolabial folds", that dresses cute, but doesn't stand out in a negative way, but how to do that?
How do normal girls do their makeup or hair, how should i dress and most importantly how should i behave so that other girls will like me?
There's nothing i want more than having girlfriends for simply having movie nights together, eating pizza and chatting…

No. 78399

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> nothing i want more than having girlfriends for simply having movie nights together, eating pizza and chatting

Mystery, is that you? Aren't you banned from lolcow? Please stick to r9k for your sperging.

No. 78402

That's why i put normie and basic in quotation marks, i simply couldn't think of a better word.
And what has wanting to be a likable girl in order to find friends to do with sperging…?

No. 78405

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imagine being this retarded

No. 78408

What's your problem?!

No. 78410


There's already a thread about this

No. 78414

How long have you considered yourself to be "non-normie" anon?

After school I enrolled in a uni far away from the rural high school and in the process lost most of my friends (retained literally one) and had to start from square one with irl friend making. I'm still obviously "friends" with them but most are doing their own shit now in different areas of the country or having kids at the age of 19. I’ve made a few decent friends this semester and managed to retain them just out of daily habit.

>How do normal girls do their makeup or hair

Literally prolly how you do yours nigger, by looking in the mirror applying a foundation/bb cream etc. No one's expecting you to look flawless but do wear bare minimum foundation or bb cream if you want to boost your self esteem without too much effort. Unless your a POC with kinky as shit hair or some rare female baldness you should be fine with styling your hair into basic do’s, if your into sports or shit that requires tied hair I wouldn’t bother too much.

>how should i dress

The Fashion thread has some pretty mean digs on it to with a lot of normie outfits you can get inspiration from but also add your personal flair. We do all like to stand out from the crowd in some way shape or form even when conformity is thrust in our faces, have your red hunting hat that sets you aside.

>how should i behave so that other girls will like me?

If you must befriend girls and only girls try not to exude negativity I find females are more sensitive to negativity on any topic than males though I found it hard to resist bagging art majors. It's around midterms now and I've made a decent amount of contacts this semester at least 5, been out with friends a bit to festival, social gatherings, movies etc Ready player one was terrible. studied in groups and just generally hung out on campus. I live off campus but have still managed to form a social life in the form of staying my ass on campus for the entire day until 6ish and haven't regretted this at all. Normally i'd be immediate to go home early to unwind being an introvert but I've found myself being the one initiating social shit, i'd implore you to do the same. Strike up a conversation between yourself and colleagues, do you attend a uni/college? Ask others to form a study groups, discuss tests/lecture content I only did because I fucked my biochem test but it actually turned into some relationship building shit.

I don't believe browsing anonymous internet forums which nitpick nasolabial folds and saggy tits is a death sentence for one's social life, I've meet about the same amount of nitpicky fucks irl as online. This site is a personal vice.

No. 78415

Please stop

No. 78416

Anon would probably get banned for necroing it.

No. 78418

I'm in the same boat, but for me it's partially depression, partially lack of money (for experimenting with makeup or clothes), partially social anxiety.
I have some friends but I always feel bad because they look really feminine compared to me and I'm unintentionally tomboyish because I don't know how to dress myself or do my hair.
I really need to be spoonfed on how to pick the right colors for my complexion (I'm a pale olive) and the right silhouette, but I don't want to burden any of my friends irl and they probably wouldn't know anyway.

No. 78424

I started getting "different" than my peers when i was around 16 and got into Kpop. When i was in my last year of high school i started listening to Vkei, dressed weirdly, wore shitty makeup etc. Until after i graduated i still went out with friends, but now, nearly 4 years later i completely lost touch with reality. I do go to Uni and i work on the side, but all of that while wearing the same black hoodie, no makeup and without ever talking to anybody. I have no idea about nowadays fashion or what music or tv show are popular atm.

I might have not worded that correctly, but like you as well, i have absolutely no idea how to dress and wear makeup normally, since the only times i did dress myself up, it was some bad attempt at emo/weeaboo style…

Of course lolcow isn't to bad of a site, but all of this combined, paired up with anxiety and depressions and spending time on 4chan, etc…

No. 78480

How to become socially fluent? I've been a reclusive shit for years and whenever I talk to people it seems like I'm still missing some vital element of something, like they can sense it. Usually the advice is to "bee yourself" or act friendly which is ok but it still feels like something's missing. Think of a man transitioning to female, you know what he's going for with a wig and dress but still ping him as a man. Idk how to explain it better. Can anons relate?

No. 78482

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in my experience, you have to bomb a lot and have a lot of awkward moments to figure out your personal style of socializng. I don't think it can really be avoided. I find that the moments where I feel most awkward and embarrassed socially are the ones where I said something I didnt really mean to try to seem funny/interesting and it bombed. Being socially fluent and comfortable means saying things that feel authentic and natural to you, so if even if other people don'g get you, you don't feel like you were trying to hard. The problem is, when I was a recluse there WASN'T anything that felt authentic or natural to say because I didn't actually want to say anything and that was what I used to. So it took trial and error and saying things I later regretted and cringed at to actually figure out what I actually wanted to say and develop a sense of "this feels right and this is what i want to say" vs "if i say this maybe people will like me oh gosh hope it works!"

No. 78489

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I second this, it's easy to overcompensate by trying to seem cool or funny and it will almost always come off wrong if you were saying it purely to impress people and not because you actually wanted to say it.

No. 78493

>when I was a recluse there WASN'T anything that felt authentic or natural to say because I didn't actually want to say anything
I get this. It's not necessarily that I have nothing to say, it's that I don't have anything to say that I want people to hear or respond to. Some people talk because they enjoy talking in itself, but I'm used to going through full thought processes in my head to the point that I'm not looking for anyone's input. And I assume that what I have to say is not interesting/relevant unless they're already interested in me (which is why I find it easy to talk on dates but not at work, for example, since one has some established interest and the other is forced to be around me), so I feel like contributing to a conversation will be pointless or awkward.

No. 78498

sis i used to overthink like that too. if you bite the bullet and say things even if they're ultimately pointless, you'll occassionally get interesting responses from people and before you know it you're having a rich, interesting conversation irl

No. 78520

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Bless this thread

No. 78534

Does anyone know who normie girls aspire to be like?

No. 78632

Depends on the person… I've heard everything from Hillary Clinton to Sofia Vergara.

No. 78988

No they wouldn't. Please lurk more, the catalog's there for a reason.

No. 104526

Genuine question, how do I get myself out of the weird isolation I've got myself into?

I started a job at a coffee shop and everyone I work with are trendy normies, it's incredibly cliquey and because I have bad anxiety I've ended up establishing myself as THAT weird anxious girl and I stammer a lot.

I'm by no means weird looking and I can pass for a normie…until anyone talks to me and then I just can't blend in. They all laugh and have banter and I don't know how to befriend them so my shifts always feel very lonely and isolated because it's just me fucking up and being awkward.

To elaborate they're all party crowd

No. 104530

Aw shit I had the same issue in my old job, but took steps to fix it (too late tho)

You can always try to make smalltalk with them individually and try to hang out around them during lunch. You don't need to have a full blown conversation, just inject your comment here and there and see how it goes.

No. 104535

Maybe you need some help to fix your anxiety?

No. 104554


Unfortunately we have lunch breaks at different times so interaction is hard


I wish I knew how, I've gotten better over the years but it's the same as high school,no matter how nice I make myself look externally, my personality remains odd and I'm as awkward to them as ever so I get blamed a lot at work for things they did or pushed into the shitty jobs like a doormat

No. 104572

This, what do you have to offer?
If you're a loyal caring person then you need to show it, if you can offer interesting conversation you need to open up etc etc
You can't just act like an anime protagonist and still collect friends in adulthood

No. 104573

It's not about your appearance, tons of normie girls are friends with homely or tomboy girls.
Women are not going to chase you like some thirsty dude for your friendship, they might take some initial steps but if you're hesitant they will back off.
You just have to make an effort, if a girl comes and chats you up and you can barely respond, it's also pretty awkward for them. Open up, be more positive, make plans too.
That can require anything from just pushing yourself a bit more to intense therapy and medication, but it is what it is.

No. 107657

This is really really good advice.

I did this, and the amount of self-cringe is well worth being comfortable in conversations, fuck. People don't care.

No. 107679

I’m starting a job at an upscale place soon
22-25 yr Farmers what do you wear to work?

No. 107702

Uh…whats the occupation?

No. 107720

Like >>107702 said, specifics. But just look at "business casual" on pinterest. Everything on pinterest is normie

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