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No. 2172675
A thread for venting about difficult stuff going on in your life.
Previous vent thread:
>>>/ot/2162077Follow all the /ot/ board rules & don't reply to bait.
Don't come to this thread to make fun of anons' vents, to demean them, or to try and be funny with some shit snark reply. It's annoying. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all.
No. 2172690
>>2172588Then you should still be aware of the average moid and their porn consumption, even if you want to blindly believe your nigel is different. It's not just channers and redditors and it's not something condensed in one class/race/religion etc. It's quite literally every moid from early age onwards. They openly and shamelessly talk about it in public too, so I don't get your sentiment.
Just saying this in the minimal offchance this is just someone very very sheltered, even though the weird "you must be bitter because someone cheated on you" responses tell me otherwise.
No. 2172710
File: 1726871349469.webp (112.11 KB, 600x421, kitten hug.webp)
>>>/ot/2172661Thanks
nonnie. I'm trying to not let me get this down but with app dating sometimes celibacy seems easier. I'll wait a day or two for an adequate excuse and then I'll consider burning his house down. I'd do it now but I really fecking liked that prick.
No. 2172753
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Just needed somewhere to rant.
I cannot stand seeing people in the BJD community drop thousands of dollars on discontinued dolls… just to do their faceups themselves, and do an awful job of it. It's infuriating me as someone who has had to put aside getting my first BJD for years now because I just don't have the money for it yet. Someone in a large BJD server is making the attached monstrosity and sure, as far as BJD faceups go its not that bad. But for this specific discontinued doll, which they supposedly spent a large amount of money on, why not just send it to a professional? They clearly have the money. This isn't their first faceup either, they say they've been doing them for years, so what's the excuse?
Then again, I'm almost positive this is a recast. The eye-holes don't look right despite them supposedly not doing any modifications to the doll, the skintone is off compared to the standards of the company (even if you adjust for the fact that resin will not come out as the exact same color every time a doll is produced), and they've acted really shady in the server about where and how they acquired this doll. This specific doll is also very popular to recast, as it's a very popular doll in general.
No. 2172759
I don't engage with deadbeat losers anymore. I will make polite conversation but never reveal anything about myself or ask them anything, and will ignore or gray rock them whenever possible.
I grew up in a poor rednecky environment myself and it was crazy how poverty breeds cruelty and pettiness. Lots of problems these people had were completely preventable but they craved only instant gratification and never thought about consequences, and now it's everyone else's fault but theirs. When I was a teen they tried to bully me by spreading rumors and picking on me any chance they got because I didn't want to hang out with them and drink or fuck 20-something losers. Now they still try it because they don't like that I'm not broke with 5 baby daddies and a dead-end wagie job or on drugs.
It's not about money, it just really wasn't hard to not be a teen mom, not drink, not start smoking, get decent grades and go to community college. I did okay for myself, but whenever I go home you'd think I was Jeff Bezos from the nuclear asshurt I cause. They of course always insinuate my "success" (I have a normal desk job, no kids and a regular salary) is because I slept my way to the top or did something illegal. Then they try to rope me into some local drama and ask for my input like what I think about cousin Bessie and her deadbeat husband's latest fight. I say anything and I'm taking sides and will get called an uppity bitch.
Don't care, sort it between yourselves. There's never any self-reflection or attempts at improvement, just endless seething about others who have it better. Then you wonder why your life is shit.
No. 2172765
File: 1726874230747.jpg (405.43 KB, 1024x683, betternitu.jpg)
>>2172755Here's an example of a more professional faceup on the same mold. It's in the details; mostly that the person who owns the doll is being so heavy-handed and using a much thicker brush than they should be. Their detailing is shaky and far too thick. They are clearly trying to copy a faceup like this one as well, so side-by-side you can really tell they're missing their mark. To me, this is like if you bought a very expensive figurine you need to paint yourself, and then tried to paint it with a standard paintbrush instead of something smaller. You wouldn't be able to get the details right.
It doesn't really matter, I'm just so annoyed. Especially since they're acting really smug about even owning the doll at all in the server, while ruining it.
No. 2172780
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the sob emoji pisses me off so bad i swear its always the most annoying condescending fuckers using it and not to mention the lolicon associations god i hate hate hate it
No. 2172810
File: 1726876045012.png (36.49 KB, 626x256, 179.png)
>>2172803>>2172801shes talking about this meme
No. 2172914
>>2172690I’m not her but I hate this line of thinking so much. Saying it’s literally every man just gives men an excuse. Because if it’s truly every man then it’s ingrained in them to behave that way, there’s nothing they can do about it, and we shouldn’t criticize the behavior or expect them to change because according to you they’re incapable of that.
Bleak blackpill takes like this only serve to help men and make excuses for them. Not every man is a gooner, and any worthwhile man should abstain from porn so that he isn’t associated with inhuman trash.
No. 2172936
>>2172923do it anyway, I want to see 30-40 year old fashion that's not target shopping momcore
Fashion content always seems like it's either only meant for teens/college age, or silver postmenopausal 55+ chic grans if you look for "mature fashion"
No. 2172945
>>2172914>Because if it’s truly every man then it’s ingrained in them to behave that way, there’s nothing they can do about it, and we shouldn’t criticize the behavior or expect them to change because according to you they’re incapable of that. This is a retarded conclusion to make. Under no circumstances do we need to accept or tolerate something just because it is normal, or common, or even universal. If all men behave a certain way and there's nothing they can do about it, accepting that means we are equipped with important knowledge that informs our choices - for example, choosing to avoid men entirely, or finding ways to mitigate their damage. Sticking our heads in the sand only hurts us and benefits men. If we're lucky, maybe women will realize that if all men are shit the best option is to decentre them, remain vigilant and stay single, not to accept that it's inevitable and unavoidable and therefore forgivable (which you seem to think is the only possible result of believing AMALT).
No. 2173033
>>2173017I am so sorry nona. I know nothing I can say will make it feel any better, so instead I’ll give you some advice as someone who went through the process myself not too long ago.
First, if you are able, being there when it happens will be healing in the long run. It will be difficult to do but you’ll look back on it as a positive memory years from now I promise. Being there with your dog in their last moments is a comforting thing in a weird way.
Second, get some memorabilia. There are so many options, you can get a cast of their nose or their paw if you want something pricey. You could keep some fur in a little jar. A nose print or a paw print on cheap canvas is easy enough to do. It might not be a top priority now but it will be nice to have.
And last, if they have any special quirks like a weird bark, or a loud snore, or anything like that make sure you get a recording of it. I didn’t want pictures of my girl as she got sick because I wanted to remember her healthy and happy, but I missed out on recording her bark and I regret it a lot. She had such a weird bark and I wish I could hear it again
Best of luck with everything
No. 2173054
Apologies for this vent being very weird, I am aware of it. Firstly, why are my emotions so strong? I actually have symptoms of apathy and have had flat-effect since childhood that I managed to almost semi-unlearn, my family used to make me feel very weird for it. I don’t feel emotions in regular day to day life like most people do, like if all I did was work 9-5 at an office job and just went home and ate and slept I would never feel emotions, ever, they come up in specific circumstances. However when they do, some of them are so intense it’s unmanageable.
An example is my crushes, which I think might be the strongest instance. I like this girl right now and it hurts so, so much. To me she is the most beautiful, purest angel. I think about her every day. I genuinely think a scientist should study my brain whenever I think about her, there has to be an explosion of chemicals, also structurally something must be up. Anyway, I’ve erected a shrine for her. I don’t talk to her by the way, if I did I could be completely normal, to others I seem normal but odd parts of myself like this I hide completely and will never show to anyone. But I’m in so much pain right now, thinking about her, I love her so much, she hasn’t done anything incredible but I find the flavour of her soul so incredible, like the key to the universe.
No. 2173087
>>2173017I had to put down my own childhood dog a few years ago. He was also full of tumors and old as hell. He was normal the day before, and then suddenly he couldn't get up and was struggling to move or breathe.
We took him to the Humane Society. They do all of the services that other nonnas were mentioning, but cheaper than a lot of veterinarians. They took good care of him medically, and we could pay them to make a paw print for us. They also took care of his cremation. I would recommend looking into it. Our veterinarian was completely booked up with appointments and couldn't take him until the next week. This would have only prolonged his suffering.
I stayed in the room with him as he was being put down. If it makes you feel any better, it was legitimately the most peaceful way to die that I have ever seen. They gave him the first shot (a sedative) and he was instantly relieved of all suffering. He fell into the most peaceful nap I've ever seen, and then they gave him the second shot. The whole thing was over in less than 15 seconds. I still cried like a bitch in front of everyone.
Honestly, the best advice I can give is to just let yourself grieve in the exact way that you need to. Our dumb mammal brains are built to form incredibly strong bonds with the living beings around us, and your neurochemicals barely know the difference between a beloved human and a beloved animal. If you're over it in a week, that's ok. If you're fucked up about it for a while, that's ok. It's weird, but I had some of the same grief thoughts about my dog that I had about close friends and family members who died. I'm not even one of those dog-obsessed people, so I didn't expect to be all that bothered by a pet dying. I thought I wouldn't even cry when he passed. I was wrong af about that one lmao
No. 2173093
>>2173070You mention having flat affect as a kid. Have you been evaluated for autism or any other neurological disorder? I have seen a couple of case studies of individuals with almost the same feelings that you're describing, and they all either had autism or a Cluster-A personality disorder. (Schizoid personality disorder, specifically. Despite its name, it has nothing to do with schizophrenia, delusions, or hallucinations.)
It might help you access therapies that can help you, or point you in the direction of good coping mechanisms.
No. 2173104
>>2173093I haven’t been evaluated for any psychological condition. I was meant to be seen for potential depression at 16 but you had to chase them up about it so, just didn’t bother. I’ve read about different clusters and I don’t remember relating to any of the cluster A disorders. Autism… I seem to relate to autistic people, not the actual criteria, if that makes sense.
>>2173094Oh, that’s a good idea actually! I don’t know why I didn’t think of that. Thank you.
No. 2173121
>>2173111I just googled him (I've never heard of him before) and his young face looks extremely normal. I have seen thousands of both males and females with this phenotype. If you're insecure about it, people probably don't give as much of a shit about it as you think.
People on this website act like you're disfigured and disgusting if you aren't a perfect 10/10 with an ultra snatched instagram model face, but this is not the truth.
(Also, thank you for giving me a new true crime topic to google. I had no idea that the Swedish and Norwegian death metal scenes used to beef so hard that they were murdering each other. Interesting.)
No. 2173122
>>2173113oh and my shithead brother plays the
victim too. like he tells mom, "I think [my name] hates me", then boymom takes his side and interrogates me about it. even tho Im never rude to him, one time he said this for because I didnt laugh enough. Another time, he said this because I made a negative facial expression for a split second, because I didnt like that he stood there watching me lift heavy groceries. Other times for no reason at all, "just a feeling". he does this once in a while, constantly, for years. No matter what I do.
Does your brother do this type of stuff?
No. 2173133
>>2173093ayrt but are you sure you're not replying to
>>2173054? I'm a different anon KEK but I do have autism
No. 2173136
>>2173133yeah, I clicked the wrong post lol.
…BUT I made this other post to rectify it.
>>2173099(here's to hoping I didn't click the wrong shit two more times)
No. 2173144
>>2173122lmao my post was LITERALLY about my struggles having a boymom. To this day, she lets him fuck around with zero responsibilities, and expects me to be the only sibling who does anything around the house. Despite him having a job, he is not expected to pay for anything around the house.
I won't rehash my massive essay to avoid boring everyone, but both of my parents are old and sick. I dropped out of school to take care of them after a massive emergency. I just finished a two-year degree to help me get a job, and my mom is already telling me that I'll be expected to help pay bills. My brother still pays nothing. All I want is just to get my shit together and gtfo, but I also have a weird guilt complex about leaving them.
As for weird interactions, I haven't had anything happen to me that's exactly like what you're describing. My brother doesn't gaf if I like him or not. My main gripe with him is that he's openly allowed to talk down to me and treat me like complete shit. He's knows that he's above me in the family hierarchy, and he's also obsessed with the idea of being respected as some kind of highly-esteemed figure, despite doing literally nothing to earn respect. He's been like this since we were kids, and mom always takes his side.
The worst instance I can think of is a time he tried to strangle me when I was like, 12. I don't even know what I did to provoke that. My only guess is that maybe he decided that I wasn't listening to him? He goes on long tangents about boring shit all the time and I tune them out. It was late at night and I was reading a book while laying down on my bed (we were spending summer at our grandma's house and I was forced to share a room with him.) Then my older brother just started strangling me, with his full weight on my neck. I tried to fight him off, but I obviously couldn't. I screamed as loud as I could, and he instantly bitched out and jumped off me, trying to hide what he was doing. Mom came running in the room and I told her that he tried to strangle me (I was crying and had marks on my neck to prove it.) She asked him why he did it, and he said something like, "Because I'm SICK of the LACK of RESPECT!"
He received no punishment. She didn't even yell at him. She just made him spend the night in her room instead, "So you two kids can't start fighting with each other anymore!" As if I was an actual participant in the situation.
No. 2173145
>>2173144Sorry for clogging up the threads with my long ass posts, but I have nowhere else to talk about this.
The thing that drives me insane is that the favoritism is so cartoonishly pronounced that it sounds fake. If I posted my experiences on reddit or something, everyone would say I made it up for clicks.
Honestly, I think this is just what it's like to grow up as the sister of a favorite mommy's boy. Growing up, I knew a bunch of other girls in similar situations.
No. 2173168
>>2173144>>2173145>>2173150Meant to say earlier, thanks for making me feel heard. I found and read your other posts in the previous thread and Im so sorry to hear all that youve been through, and sorry to hear that you were strangled. Im truly amazed at all your hard work and dedication, to not only looking after your dad [sorry to hear of his medical issues, just found out my dad has multiple heart blockages but so far is doing okay], while pursuing schooling/career. I was too stupid for a STEM degree, so took a meme degree, and could not ever get a job back when I had references years ago. I have extreme social anxiety/agoraphobia/fear of being attacked. I was strangled in kindergarden by a moid who is now an award winning medical professional making 100k. Plus domestics growing up didnt help either.
My favored brother has mentioned disturbing "jokes" about attacking women for annoying him like laughing/talking too loud, and pressures me to go places with him driving me, even to medical appointments that I want private from him. Hes really creepy and is almost always home. Harassed me everytime I went to the bathroom, for years, mom said he did so deliberately because "he thinks you dont like him" as if I deserve it. Now I have trouble emptying fully, cant relax my muscles to let all the pee out. I help with cleaning and cooking, yet mom says brother "does everything" which is so insulting. Brother literally asks mom to make him tea, or meals, anytime day or night. Lunch, dinner, evening, 4am doesnt matter. Same with if he demands laundry for her to do, for the next day, right before she wanted to sleep? Too bad. Mom gets up drops everything [even if were chatting, she ditches me] and serves him. My brother is nearly 40, mom has hip problems, still she slaves over him.
Your posts reminded me..Once when I was 12 my brother tried to run over my foot, months after I had toenail removal surgery. He wouldnt talk to me on the way back when I asked him why he did that, and played a song really loud he knew I hated. I never found out why. I assume he was mad because he had to pick me up from school? On a day I was really badly bullied no less. Similarly, my mom didnt punish him or yell at him. Same year, brother whined to mom that he had to spend $15 to buy me a magazine, so Im not even worth that to him. And Im the bad one for wanting to avoid him?
More recently, dad [with multiple heart blockages] was going to go on a work trip and wanted someone to drive him, so asked my brother who likes driving and has his own truck. Dad pays for everything btw. My brother laughed and scoffed, with an attitude like, "who do you think you are?!" to his own dad, and refused. Mom said to dad that she worries that dad will abandon brother, as if hes a little boy. Then mom turned to me and said, "cant you go instead?" That just says it all, doesnt it? Dad ended up not having to go, as another coworker went on the trip instead of dad.
There needs to be more shaming of boymoms, and research on boymoms experienced through the lens of the blacksheep daughter. And more coping techniques.
No. 2173170
>>2173150and yes please share the resources.
Are your mom and brother both misogynists, because mine sure are. Not sure if I mentioned this, but years ago, mom told me that once I was born and came home from the hospital, my brother destroyed my room, because he wanted a brother instead of a sister. Mom laughed when she told me, like she thought it was cute. Of course when I asked her about it more recently, she denied ever telling me this. But Ill never forget it.
No. 2173205
>>2173189thanks for the encouragement. yes the favored one, my brother says to mom that he feels sad that it feels like dad wants him to move out and or get a job, mom insults dad and says brother has a right to live here, poor brother who wants to hear that from his own dad? etc.
brother even parks his 2 trucks closest to the house. he cares more about his trucks than his parents and I. when it rains, snows, whatever, he can also have the advantage of going in the house quicker. when carrying heavy groceries, which fucked up my back, that was more distance for mom & I to lug everything from the distance we were parked at, to the house. he only recently started lifting heavy groceries, mom always told him, "no you shouldnt have to, we'll get it instead!" he even built a giant canopy to protect one of his trucks from the weather. it blocks flowers from getting sun, it could be so nice if he would move and take all his trash with him.
No. 2173243
>>2173170Financial information sources that helped me:
(Putting up this part first and then responding to your other posts)
DISCLAIMER: I do not agree with the personal political opinions of every individual I will list here. I actually disagree with a lot of them, but their financial advice checks out.
>The cornerstone: Budgeting.The 50-30-20 budget is the most common plan. This will give you an easy, basic template that helps you figure out how much money you need to live.
60-20-20 is the modified version for lower income people (i.e., if you make around the 45k/year.)(Assume that all number in this hypothetical are after taxes.)
This budget operates on a monthly basis, which makes it easier to understand than an annual budget.
If you make 45k a year, then your monthly income will fall around $3,750.
60% of your total monthly income is for needs. 20% is for wants. Another 20% goes to retirement/investing and saving. (You DO NOT need to spend ALL of the money in your needs/wants category. If you have some from those categories left over at the end of the month, put it in savings or investments.)
RENT: This is within the needs category, and makes up the bulk of that category. Your total monthly rent should ideally fall around 30-40% of your total monthly income. If you make $3,750/month and pay 40% for rent, then your rent will be $1,500 (try to find the cheapest housing possible that is still safe. If you can get your rent to a lower percentage, this is good.) The rest of the "needs" category is for other things, mainly bills.
Once you've calculated your ideal rent, you can plan everything else around that.
There are many women living alone who have posted videos on youtube breaking down their personal budgets using this plan (and how they adapt it to their city's cost of living.) I recommend looking some of them up.
>Cheap housing: Learn From Travel NursesThis is one I know about because of being around the health profession.
There are sites like furnishedfinder. They exist specifically to offer cheap, affordable, furnished housing for rent. Mainly for travel workers, but anyone is allowed to use it. Inclusive of basically everything you need for daily living. Most of the clientele is made up of travel nurses, but some landlords don't care what job you do as long as you're honest with them. Bad credit is also less of an issue because these are private citizens renting spaces, not huge companies that will run your credit.
The housing on these sites are meant to be 100% ready to live in the second you show up, no set up or further purchase required. The listings include furniture, cookware, bed, hairdryer, etc.
You also have the option of renting rooms rather than full units for less cash. I've seen rooms in my city for around $800. You'll have to share the house with the landlord, but most of them are middle-aged nurse ladies, which makes me feel safer. I will likely take this route to get my first housing after moving out from my family situation. You don't have to stay in this type of housing forever, just until you have enough money to buy and furnish your own place if you want. I met one woman who used it for a quick escape from an
abusive situation.
Make sure you read all the info listed about the space before applying so that you'll know what to expect. Not all of them are great.
Inside info: on the back end, a lot of these websites don't give the landlords notifications when someone applies to rent a space. After applying, send them an email introducing yourself and saying you're interested to make sure they know.
If you want to know more, travel nurses (and other travel health workers) post info about the housing sites they use on youtube and reddit.
>RAMSEY BABY STEPS: Financial planning advice, retirement, saving, etc.Dave Ramsey is an old Christian boomer from Tennessee, so I don't agree with him on a lot of things. His financial advice has literal decades of data backing it up, though.
Google the baby steps and follow them. He has a radio show/podcast, and videos on youtube explaining how to do the things he recommends.The 50-30-20 budget is good for understanding money on a month to month basis, but Ramsey is a good source for setting up long term goals for svaing/investing/retiring.
He is a good main source for financial advice, but I have one issue with him: he doesn't believe in using credit at all. I wish I could do this, but it basically isn't possible in the modern world. Many people follow a modified Ramsey plan that includes credit cards.
>Credit:Idk where you are in this journey, so I'm assuming that you're starting from zero like I did.
Only use a SECURED credit card with NO ANNUAL FEE.
Do not pay for anything with a credit card unless you already have the money to pay off the charge. Then, pay it off ASAP.
NEVER float a credit bill (always pay it 100% at the end of the month.) Some people freak out about getting a credit card with a bad interest rate, but the interest rate literally only kicks in if you don't pay off the card before the month is over.
Don't cancel your first credit card. The length of your credit history is a major factor in your credit score.
Every beginner card has a bad rate, so it's something you'll have to live with for at least a few months.
Some of you are going to clown me for this, but go on youtube and search "Graham Stephan how to build credit".
He and his fanbase can both be cringe, but his credit advice is actually good. He explains pretty clearly how to start from a 100% beginner and build credit. Actual accountants have given me the literal same advice as Graham Stephan, just in more complicated language. He also has advice for fixing bad credit. His face is still punchable, though.
I don't recommend to try anything crazy with credit card churning or points or whatever. I am mathematically stupid, so I like to keep my financial business as simple and risk-free as possible.
I think I'm running out of space in this one post, but I can post more detail about different topics if anyone wants.
No. 2173253
>>2173087I had to have my cat put down during a medical emergency. He started having uncontrollable seizures and I rushed him to the emergency vet. Within minutes of being there he was wrapped in a blanket and calm after being sedated. Breathing deeply like he was having the best sleep. I cradled him in my arms, cried, sang to him, and then while I was still holding him the vet put him to sleep forever. I got as much time with him alone as I wanted and then he was given back to me so I could bury him myself per my own request.
It went from an extremely traumatic situation full of panic to just simply watching him fall asleep, calm, held by me, knowing he was safe and loved. It really was such a peaceful and easy process, I wish more people knew that so they could have less anxiety and grief going in.
It’s not some cold, scary thing. It’s very private and they will do everything they can to make you and your pet as comfortable as possible.
No. 2173256
>>2173168Aw, thanks for thinking I'm good at math. I'm actually terrible at it. The highest class I can pass is basic algebra. One of the reasons I went into an allied health field is that it had less complex math. Otherwise, I might have gone for nursing.
This just activated another deep memory. When I was little kid in elementary, I think one of my teachers wanted to have me tested for dyscalculia (so I could get referred to a special class for it,) but my parents wouldn't allow it. My mom also had a weird complex about not having a "special" kid.
>mom has hip problems, still she slaves over him. Very relatable. I have no idea what drives boymoms to act like this. I could never.
>>2173170My brother is absolutely a misogynist. He constantly critiques the appearances of women who would never look his way.He's gone on rants before just to complain about women. Anytime he doesn't like a woman for any reason, the first thing he does is talk badly about her appearance. He's the type of guy who sits on social media calling Margot Robbie ugly. I'm pretty sure he's into redpill type content. Like bro, the reason girls won't date you has nothing to do with your skull or whatever. You are agonizing to speak to. You choose to be a loser in life. You barely brush your teeth.
My mom? I have no idea. She has never said anything that implies she hates women. She just has a massive preference for her son over her daughter. Maybe she has some kind of subconscious misogyny, idk.
No. 2173276
File: 1726911340555.jpeg (43.57 KB, 500x281, sailor_uranus.jpeg)
>Genetically wired to be attracted to moids
>Every single one, without fail, is a piece of shit
I'm done playing evolution's game. I'm giving up on bringing more kids with my affliction into the world.The cycle of shit ends with me. I'm not going to subject anyone else to this.
No. 2173383
>>2173374I wish radfem circles weren't so straight
and lesbian-hating in the case of some groups because I'd love to be able to talk about reappropriating 'bimbo' shit and similar for a gay female gaze without the constant drag but "but moids get off on it tho!"
No. 2173406
>>2173383well duh, you're on pure libfem bullshit. like what you like without trying to sanitize the reality men are looking this shit up and jacking off to it, see femininity is a sign of submission, and that you've been influenced by misogynistic messaging. at least
>>2173374 is honest she simply likes it.
No. 2173434
>>2173422i meant this post
>>2173422 about reappropriating bimbo aesthetic as libfem bullshit and lying to yourself, not the first anon schlicking to it.
No. 2173447
>>2173017You and your family know best for your dog. My childhood dog passed away about 2 years ago today and my dad and I fought about putting her to sleep (I wanted to put her to sleep, he didn't). She struggled a lot during her last month, despite everything I did (alone!!!) to try and make sure she was comfortable. It took a massive toll on me. I sit in a space between thinking "she didn't need to suffer for that much longer" and "I'm glad I did everything I could for her up until the end".
I know you all love her very much, and giving her peace in her final moments is the best thing you can do. Other nonnies have already suggested paw/nose prints, which I also would second. I have my dog's paw prints, and we also have an imprint of her paw too. I also saved up some of her fur from combing, but to this day I do wish I had trimmed some to have more than just a bundle of her undercoat (my logic at the time was "I don't want her to go to heaven with a whack ass haircut!!" kek).
Losing a pet is not easy. I am still grieving two years later. I handle it much better than before and most days when I think of her I think less and less of her suffering at the end and more of our happy times together, but there are still many days where I will cry. Just a few hours ago I was at the gym and had to take a moment for myself because I was about to burst into tears because I missed her so much kek.
We have a pet loss thread here if you want to post more about your doggy, and maybe post photos of her.
>>>/ot/1364964 I wish you and your family well. Thank you for taking care of your sweet girl up until now. I am sure she knows you all love her very much, and she loves all of you too. Take care of yourself
nonnie ♥
No. 2173508
File: 1726928636595.gif (801.91 KB, 220x198, blanket-attack.gif)
I WANT MY LIMITED PULL DAMN ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT GIVVVVEEEEEEE ITTTTTTTT
No. 2173520
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Everyone around me is so retarded
No. 2173525
>>2173395Ukrainian refugees are not in a diplomatic crisis/open air prison, and military conflicts have a great repercussion on internal politics, especially in the context of very important worldwide electoral moments.
People like you confuse me, you have no sense of geopolitics, all you care about is what shows up on your tiny screen
No. 2173545
File: 1726930004380.jpg (27.97 KB, 719x762, c7bb6e4897efa24b1952a51d733eda…)
Today I woke up with the feeling that something bad will happen so im very anxious, I think the new guy I met will ghost me soon so maybe thats why. I also miss my cat.
No. 2173575
>>2173498Didn't the annexation of Crimea start the Ukraine war? Ukraine did get fullscale invaded suddenly but Russia has been targetting Ukraine for years.
Meanwhile a failing Islamic terrorist group kidnapped a bunch of civilians at a music festival slaughtered and raped the women, hung their bodies up in the name of their religion and terrorism yet they're also somehow
victims because some of their civilians get bombed. Clown world.
No. 2173744
>>2173616I think you're approaching it with the wrong mindset. Also,
>using the word high valuekek. I never was appealing to moids and they always treated me like i'm invisible or as a basic bro. When my woman friends would rant about moids giving them attention, it wasn't that I ever get jealous moreso FOMO and I can't relate to them. You're also constantly seeing on the internet how women can bag anyone and get attention from moids in a heartbeat which isn't true and can make you feel like you're doing something wrong. The "i'm worthy…to gross scrotes!" mindset is
toxic and you should learn or read books about that you exist for yourself and feeling like you're taking up space for not appealing to them correctly is how they get you
No. 2173863
File: 1726937816844.png (238.71 KB, 360x360, pngtree-anime-girl-riding-a-bi…)
Thanks to the europoor couple who intentionally trashed my cycle by ramming their pram against it.
The mechanic fixed it for me for free. No one would ever do that for you because you are both so ugly ♥ and so is your baby ♥ SIDS will find your infant's crib inshallah ♥
No. 2173868
>>2173243 Thanks for taking the time to post this, Ill look into those resources.
>>2173256Sorry to hear you were denied the help that you could have had. Youre so lucky you didnt grow up hearing your mom constantly refer to random women or even icon shapes of women as "dumb bitches", how feminism ruined the west, how "single, liberated bitches" are in the workforce worried theyll flirt with my dad, etc.
My mom brainwashed me into being antifeminist, from as early as I can remember. As of about a year ago, Im only now finally realizing that she was very wrong on that.
My brother watches map walsh, and mom constantly gushes over an openly pro-rape rightwing moid that threatened my life then banned me [and shes sick of hearing me remind her of this]. If something bad happens, they both always blame any woman nearby for something. Brother hate watches the elderly woman neighbor with binoculars or stands in the dark quietly eavesdropping on her, because he heard her correctly stating that he doesnt repair our place. Brother also eavesdrops on me and dad, literally hides behind furniture, then tells mom and they laugh about it. Mom and brother both rant everyday, almost every conversation, about how much they hate the neighbor, esp if they hear her talking. They constantly watch camera footage to see if the neighbor did anything that annoys them.
Both mom and brother hate women, so they back each other up, even agreeing they wish they only had male neighbors. They both hate nonquiet women. Even though Im quiet, I still was told to be quiet first thing on Christmas one year by brother "in case the neighbor hears us talking".
So much more. Brother has been stalling our passport applications for 2 years now, I want to travel but cant thanks to him. Another thing, when I went to the dr, mom and brother asked me if I could ask questions about brothers medical issues, because hes too lazy to make his own appointment. I could go on.
No. 2173875
File: 1726938110359.jpg (857.71 KB, 1984x1323, what.jpg)
>>2173863>ramming their pramhow are you still alive nonna and why do Europeans own prams
No. 2173943
>>2173911NTA but my mother tried to murder me when I was a child and CPS laughed in my face, they don't do shit but make the
abusive parent beat their kids harder
No. 2173966
>>2173961Samefag my parents and my entire extended family wanted me to be a girl as well. There was already enough boys.
I think I do get a degree of preferential treatment but there have been times where I’ve been belittled, like told I don’t have to be successful or smart and that I can just marry a rich man, and told to learn how to cook so I’d be a good wife. From the age of about 5 they’d tell me this. It sucks because I believed it and then I grew up to be sort of mid so it’s not happening kek. I don’t know what I’m angrier at, the misogyny or the setting me up to fail. I should have studied harder.
No. 2173992
File: 1726944995950.jpg (1.02 MB, 2138x1600, 1000016806.jpg)
I'm having that weekend restlessness/anhedonia again. I start watching a movie but I get bored of it, so I start reading a book instead but that doesn't engage me eith so I keep cycling through activities but really I just want the day to end already
No. 2174035
File: 1726946302713.jpg (1.11 MB, 3828x3828, 1000006189.jpg)
I hate that even normies are accepting of trannies in their spaces. I liked BV but guess I ain't gonna buy from there now.
No. 2174054
File: 1726946807624.jpeg (421.41 KB, 1170x629, IMG_5677.jpeg)
>go to gym
>speaker at the back is absolutely blaring tiktok top 100
>so loud you cannot hear anything else
>have headphones on full blast and all i can hear is billie eilish
>meanwhile completely different music is playing at other end of gym adding to chaos
>go up to front and ask if they could turn it down
>"OMG nona we were juuust saying how loud it is i'll go ask the boys in the back to keep it down!"
>walk back to squat rack
>lady from front walks to back towards where music is coming from
>hear her loudly go "yeah some girl was complaining ohh my god"
>"WELL OMG SHE NEEDS TO GROW UP"
>lady walks out and sees me and gives an uncomfortable smile
>it's obvious she didnt realize i could hear her conversation
wtf was that.
No. 2174076
>>2174073So did Imane end up being XX or Xwhy? Wait
>itBit much, no?
No. 2174078
File: 1726947353985.jpg (14.46 KB, 400x345, 0973c926e1145eb550f06a8cdb7c60…)
>have annoying long-term health issues
>feel better
>yay, I can be more active
>suddenly way worse
>have no energy and surf LC all day
FML
No. 2174091
>>2174080Yes
please, please can we talk about fat people I need some entertainment. I’ll start. I fucking hate fat people
>>2174082Kek funny you’d assume that, I’m just a non-burger black person. Still though, I think it’s a retarded line of anyway. Hip-hop is black
American culture, rationally a white american is “”appropriating hip-hop”” less than an african or non-American black person would be but who will always be considered the appropriator? The white person. Disregarding the whole idea around appropriation to begin with, which I don’t agree with. Just funny standards.
It’s interesting how people (especially americans since it’s such a melting pot) centralise visual race over actual cultural ties. It’s in the same ballpark as people coming for non-EA people wearing kimonos but wouldn’t do the same to a Korean or even a Vietnamese or something, similarly I’ve heard Asian-Americans fetishise or say racist things about countries their families didn’t even originate from (black Americans too) and they get away with it, simply because of what they look like. A random example is omocat with Japanese culture, she would have been cancelled already.
No. 2174116
>>2174111What the fuck are you on about? So what am I, white?
>your post alone oozes tiktok brainrot fuck off tikturdThis is so bizarre. Are you saying black people… can’t.. have.. tiktok brainrot…??
No. 2174162
>>2174153Then why’d you reply to me kek? My comment was reponse to the anon who said that some guy was culturally appropriating, unironically
>>2173993. You’re the one who started spouting about ~cultural art forms~ and all that shit. Don’t reply to me and then complain that my argument has nothing to do with you when it wasn’t
meant for you.
No. 2174176
>>2174169Do you have short term memory loss? I am the first reply to OP, literally right after their comment.
You replied to
me. Jesus fucking christ I swear anons are getting more schizo nowadays. We had a few moments of peace when lolcow first came back but now it’s back to shit with genuinely sub 80 iq retards who can’t read and would fail and English comprehension paper.
(infighting) No. 2174188
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>>2174176Ok, so when you hover the cursor over the link, it shows the message to which you've replied. This is a screenshot of me hovering over the link on your post, which shows that it is a reply to my post. If you're just bored and trolling that's cool but you should probably see a neurologist.
No. 2174206
>>2174188Can you not see… that in your comment that I replied to… you… replied… to me??? …FIRST???
>>2174204As I said I am black. Also idk why you’re agreeing with her when she’s talking about a different thing. You’re both retarded. I’m leaving for my own peace of mind jesus christ
No. 2174217
>>2174007>>2174046Ok girlies I'm not even black hhhh, calm your cute little pink nipples, the "cultural appropriation" was just an exaggeration tbh, it's just cringe to wanna posture as something you are not, i.e : a cool masculine guy from the hood, and all his hoodly hardships
>>2174153What this anon said thank you for telling them
No. 2174324
>>2174294That’s when you go NC when you can. Fuck parents like this, a parent that prioritize relationships rather Ethan their own children is a retard, unfortunately you can never convince women who are dick crazy, especially when they’re older.
You and your sister deserved better nonna. I’m sorry.
No. 2174416
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i wish mothers wouldn't pass their insecurities down onto their daughters or force them into beauty and gender norms.
i was having a great day out with my family, and when we came home i commented to my mom that i liked my outfit today and she just, out of nowhere, said the only thing she'd change is my nose. i have a pretty strong roman nose like literally every single other person in my family, none of us have straight or button noses, and i never thought about it negatively until today. hell, even in my worst insecure phases my nose was always the one feature i liked, and i just feel like utter shit about it now.
and the thing is - this only happens when i look feminine. i've had short hair and dressed in masculine clothing for most of my life because that's what's practical and comfortable for me. i decided to let my hair grow out recently and i've started wearing skirts and dresses instead of my usual clothes because i feel like experimenting and i want to see what it's like. ever since i started doing that she's become both more supportive and more critical of how i look and how i want to look, i feel like a disappointment for not performing femininity the way she wants me to.
she isn't cruel or anything, it's just little comments like the one about my nose or how i look like i've visibly gained weight (which she did mean as a compliment, but growing up hearing about her talk how disgusting it is that she's fat and talking about gaining weight like it's a curse just made me feel like shit) or visible disappointment and abruptly ending the conversation when i tell her that i like the things that she dislikes or that i don't like what she does. i know it's a misunderstanding, it's just the fact that we have different worldviews and styles and whatnot, she doesn't mean it to hurt me, and i know that, but it still fucking does. i hate being this sensitive but hearing it from her makes it feel 100x more painful. i've been teased for this shit by other family members, and i've gotten worse comments from others but they've never gotten to me, unlike this.
this is just a hunch, but it also feels like she's relieved that i'm becoming "normal", aka. heterosexual. she's been pretty open with her opinions and feelings on gay people, even though she's also told me she'll support me no matter what, but it feels like now that i'm starting to do stereotypically feminine things she believes i'm growing out of this "phase" of same sex attraction and being a tomboy, which i'm not. again, it feels like i'm disappointing her by not fitting the female gender role.
i wish i could tell her what i feel but with our history i know we'd misunderstand eachother and get into an argument. i don't want to make her feel guilty about these things because i know that she's trying and she doesn't fully understand why i am the way that i am or why i like the things i like, and i know i'll never be able to fully understand her either but i still try daily to give her compliments and make her smile because she's my mom and i want her to be happy. it's just that i'm already very very aware of how much i fall short of what i'm supposed to be and how much i don't and can't fit in and i just wish i didn't have to hear it from her. i don't know how i'm supposed to feel at this point.
it feels like the best choice would be to leave this behind, cut my hair short and dress masculine again and leave the experimentation for a time where i can do it on my own. i wish this shit was simple for once.
No. 2174457
>>2174424i'm so sorry nonna, that's such a shit thing to say to you.
and she isn't, my father is the narcissistic one kek. it could be that case, but it just feels more like she's happy that she's finally able to have a daughter to share these things with. i think it's less about having power over me and more about her wanting what she thinks is good for me, she probably sees the feminine gender role as something to aspire to become and she thinks it's a sign of love to comment on these things, to not let your daughter be ugly of her own volition because it's one of the worst things a woman can do in our society.
that's where i appreciate her though - she's not extreme, and while she still pushes these things she doesn't push too hard. she's told me many times her priority is always our health and happiness rather than societal norms, which is a very rare mindset where i come from.
with the masculinity, i just don't think she knows what to do? i'm almost 100% sure she never expected or even though about having a child who is gay or gender nonconforming in the way i am. i think me becoming more feminine feels like she's finally on solid ground and isn't lost, it's something that she knows and can guide me on, unlike what i was before. and that's where an issue lies, she probably thinks the gay tomboy stuff was me exploring and that i'm now settling down, meanwhile for me being a tomboy and being into women is the norm, it's the feminine stuff that's more likely to be a phase.
i'd hate to break it to her though because i can see how much she appreciates things like this, even if it's just us walking around the mall or trying on old clothes. i don't want her to feel out of place or like i'm a different person, i still want to have these bonding moments with her even when i leave this phase behind.
>>2174437i feel you nonna. i hate that skinniness is used as a competition between women and it's even more vile that it happens so often between mother and daughter. and yeah, i've noticed the same thing about bmi, anything outside of the 18 range is either too fat or too thin, even if you look the exact same. i hope you can break through the bullshit that gets thrown at women and i'm glad you're at a healthy weight after all that's happened to you.
No. 2174471
File: 1726962900565.jpg (36.69 KB, 600x400, 1000064582.jpg)
I want to lose weight and get fit already, why must this be so hard? I go to the gym 3 times a week, eat nicely, barely snack and try to spend the majority of my days not sitting or laying down, isn't this healthy? I wish I could just safely restrict without my family getting worried about me skipping meals, I would be able to sleep more at night and it's not like I'm physically hungry all of the time, it's basically just me getting used to eating all day long that made me get fat, if it wasn't because of that learned behavior, I would be able to lose weight, diabetes or not, I could be doing better.
I just wish I had been born with some weird illness that made me unable to gain weight and that I could eternally be an xxs or something like that, I would be so happy, I could go anywhere to buy any clothes I want and everything would look great on me, I wouldn't have to try nor wear shape wear so I could look decent, I could wear the baggiest ugliest jeans and t-shirts and everyone would think I look cute.
I don't even care about having thick hair or strong nails, I could just not get my nails done and have ratty ass hair and everyone would still think that I look chic or even pretty.
I could also wear whatever I want to wear because everyone would think I'm endearing or brave for wearing whatever I want, not ridiculous or pathetic.
My knees would be suffering less and I would be able to keep my hyperextended legs all of the time because it would be considered elegant and not a bad thing that needs to be corrected and that hurts me.
I just want to be skinny, I don't even want to have a strong build, it doesn't look cute and doesn't make it easier for anyone to get clothes, it's basically like being fat but with muscles instead of fat.
No. 2174482
>>2173868It's ayrt again. Just woke up.
Holy shit, your mom is an actual psycho. No wonder your brother turned out to be such a piece of shit.
I think I actually lucked out in terms of my family's political leanings. My parents have always been more left-leaning politically. (I'm trying to be vague about them bc I'm scared of doxxing myself.)
When my dad was young, he used to be non-political and never vote. During the 2nd Bush presidencies, he registered to vote just to get George W out of office. In his words, "Every time I've seen the Republicans get elected, they destroy the country." Like I mentioned in other posts, my dad works in a pretty strenuous industry almost entirely populated by blue-collar workers, and he says that all the legislation that conservatives push to try and "help" blue-collar families have only ever fucked him over. Despite the recent medical emergencies, my dad is actually one of the most intelligent people I've ever met, and propbably could have been a college professor if he came from a rich family. He had an encyclopedic knowledge of basically all political events that have occurred in his lifetime, and will openly argue with Republicans and their policies.
I know that saying you have a good relationship with your dad on lolcow is like asking for a hanging, but I actually have always had a great relationship with him. He has always defended me from my other relatives and was the only person who would punish my brother for doing shitty things to me. Unfortunately, his job required a lot of traveling, and caused him to be gone for almost half of the year. Those times were when a lot of the crazy shit happened.
As for my mom - I live in the USA, but my mom came from an EU country. At the moment, it's socialized, has a pretty left-leaning government, and has a fairly high level of development for women's rights. My grandma (and other family members who still live there) have benefited a lot from living under the socialized system, and don't understand why the USA is so scared of implementing similar systems. My mom is the same way.
This is in stark contrast to how it was just a few decades ago. Both of my mom's parents were born in the 1930's. In the wake of WWII, a literal fascist dictator took over the country (a real fascist, not whatever dumb shit twitter calls facism.) To start with, the civilian death count immediately following his take over was massive. My grandfather's dad and two older brothers were taken away by the government under suspicion of housing spies or some shit (they were not.) They were never seen again. That was normal back then, and almost every family from their town has a story like this.
The way that women were treated was insane. The dictator's administration created extremely strict rules of dress and behavior for women. They thought that women's behavior was single-handedly responsible for all deviancy that afflicted mankind, and that controlling them was the only way to keep society pure. Women doing anything slightly "inappropriate" or "unfeminine" was cause for them to be taken by authorities. Policemen would interrogate women on the street for being "suspicious" (just walking around), and then the women would "disappear". Certain creepy policemen would target a woman and then follow her around until she was alone somewhere. Because of this, women used to walk around with their husbands or male family members as escorts. My grandma has a scary story about walking home from the grocery store, and getting stopped by an infamously creepy policeman because of "inappropriate dress" (like 1% of her collarbone was showing.) The only reason she escaped is because her nice elderly neighbor (who used to be an important city council member) was passing by and pretended to be her dad. My mom was a young child at that point and was with her when it happened. They both would have been taken. Once again, that was common back then.
Sometime when my mom was still a kid, the dictator asshole finally died and there were a million protests for the people's rights. By the time my mom hit 18 and moved out, women were given a significant amount of freedom. Her family was too poor to send her to school, but she was able to work jobs, rent apartments, and have bank accounts in her name. She moved across country to a city she always dreamed of living in and had a good time being free-spirited. After she met my dad, they also traveled all over the world together. She would have never been allowed to do these things if she was still the subject of an ultra-conservative, ultra-religious government.
It honestly pisses me off when I see the new wave of women pushing "trad-wife lifestyles" on tiktok or whatever, and campaigning to take away women's rights. These women and girls have no idea how lucky they are to have been born into an era where they can make their own money and aren't at the complete and total mercy of the men around them. They have no idea the level of sexual and physical violence that women were subjected to when society was completely organized around male supremacy. We still have problems, but modern society is significantly better than it used to be.
I honestly think antifeminism is just a cope for certain women who feel like they're too useless to survive without a husband instructing them on how to live. Like, sorry that you can't stop yourself from fucking up our own life without an authority figure controlling you, but that doesn't mean that the rest of us have that problem. If you want to give up your personal rights, go ahead and give them up. Stop voting, close your bank account, and quit your job. No one is stopping you. It's obvious that they just want to project their own personal failings onto all women to take off the shame of failure. "I'm not a loser! My failings aren't my fault! All women are hardwired to be like this!"
No. 2174491
>>2173868
>mom constantly gushes over an openly pro-rape rightwing moid that threatened my life then banned me Can we get some more background on this situation? Like how the hell does something like this even occur??
Also, idk what your passport situation is, but there are probably some things you can do to get your passport pushed through the system independent of your family members. You can probably call whichever passport agency you work with and engage with them as a singular customer rather than as a family group.
No. 2174530
>>2174504I think it depends on the benzo. I was taking Clonazepam and that works on the nervous system.
>>2174505I stopped taking them in October 2022. I have to make a point that my addiction was quite serious and I was taking very high doses. The detox was horrifying, I had seizures, extreme nerve pain, nightmares, trouble sleeping and symptoms of dementia among other stuff. I spent 8 months in bed recovering and I don't remember most of it. Some days I couldn't even lift a finger and my body just refused to move. I also suffer from incontinence since then so I pee myself a little every time when I sneeze. I lost a lot of muscle mass and my cardiovascular system has weakened because of this. The memory loss seems permanent because I can only recall some things from my past and they are pretty random and did not improve over time. Lost a lot of skills, had to learn basic things like writing or using a knife again. Coordination was extremely shit. I ate a lot of mushrooms to rebuild the neural networks that were damaged, so I mostly recovered my brain functions. Playing various video games also helped to stimulate my brain and restore functioning, but my body gets exhausted easily so I have to be very disciplined about my workouts and going outside every day. Otherwise I have days when I'm barely conscious, just one slip up and the next day I feel like a zombie…
No. 2174543
>>2174530That's terrifying I'm so sorry you went through that. I have 0.5mg Clonazepam pills and I've only taken it once or twice because I'm too scared to use benzos regularly. I've heard so many terrifying stories about them.
Can I ask how long you were taking these
abusive doses for?
No. 2174568
>>2174543I was taking it every day for about 10 months but constantly increasing doses starting from 1mg (I had extreme anxiety and constant panic attacks) and that went up to 8mg per day in the last 2 months before I started tapering off. But I knew I was hooked after the first time I took it, because I was suffering from the anxiety for such a long time that the relief felt incredible and I couldn't stop thinking about taking more. Unfortunately, the more you take it the more you lose the capacity to determine how retarded you are becoming because of this. So I felt like I was completely normal while acting like a crazy drunkard all the time and got almost hit by a car a few times because of poor reaction, made some very poor decisions at the time as well that I'm still experiencing consequences of.
I forgot to mention I also developed psychosis, I assume due to the damage caused to the neural networks, but that resolved itself over time thanks to mushrooms (I didn't tell any psychiatrist about this because I have a deep mistrust towards them)
No. 2174590
>>2174577Yeah I did that but the cost is too high for such examination and I can't afford it.. And if I wanted to use the refundable diagnostics, the waiting list is very long and it takes about a year to even see a doctor. So I would have to do everything from my own pocket and since they don't really know what's up, they want to do a lot of stuff. I was treated very poorly by free healthcare "professionals" so far like a junkie and been told I did this to myself and I don't have the mental capacity to hear words like that from anyone after the hell I've been through (one healthcare "professional" told me that my
abusive ex's SA was my fault because I allowed him to etc.)
No. 2174709
>>2174690idk if this is going to come off as conceited, but I'm weighing in because I think I have a lot more contact with people irl than a lot of the people on this board seem to have. I have a job and hobbies that involve constant interaction with hundreds of different people, and I am very well-liked. I was also extremely weird as a kid and possibly autistic, and I had to manually teach myself how to interact with people and be funny.
The people who don't like me still talk shit about me behind my back. The only times I have ever caught people talking about me is when they are talking shit. This isn't because everyone I meet secretly hates me or whatever. It's just that most of the time, if someone likes you, they feel no need to talk about you when you aren't there. Personally, I don't think I have ever randomly started talking about a person I like just to tell everyone how much I like them when they aren't even in the room. The only people I know who do shit like this are usually moms talking about their kids.
Sometimes characters in movies/games/shows will do shit like this to advance the plot, but it does not translate to real life.
No. 2174715
>>2174690Can't let them smell blood, I hope this doesn't sound too edgy (actually fuck it this has me ruminating to myself rn) the more you care what people think the more they use it as leverage over you. People just dislike others for sport tbh especially if they are otherwise uncontroversial, you'll be a lot more liked if you stop caring about these things since it removes the fun of disliking you if it grants no hold over your feelings.
I'm having trouble expressing things but basically fuck people, it's my experience that less attention and care towards people translates to more respect from them in every sense of the term. Because they are little bitches and again, I fucking hate them.
No. 2174719
>>2174705I wouldn't go on birth control just for that reason, but make sure you get the exact same thing shes's taking if that's what you end up doing.
There are different pills that use different hormone, and therefore cause different side effects. I have heard of women gaining more fat around their hip/butt area when taking pills that mimic progesterone, but I wouldn't know if that's what your sister is taking.
I'm not a birth control pill alarmist - it works well for a lot of women - but I have heard too many crazy stories of women's natural endocrine systems getting fucked up from taking bc that it gives me pause. I'm kind of leery about using it if I don't have to.
No. 2174734
File: 1726979468953.png (310.16 KB, 1024x995, 1651135819966.png)
I am so desperate for some kind of psychiatric validation that there's something wrong with me, and that my experiences aren't just the reality of being human. I don't know how miserable I would be if this is what living is meant to be like. Do people actually have friendships? As in, specifically, social bonds of mutual interest and shared enjoyment of each other's company? Friendship, a positive emotion towards others, is real? Do people actually have relationships, and desire them? What does a sincere want for friendship feel like, how do you maintain that feeling enough to keep friends around? How do you tell if you enjoy something or if you dislike it? Doesn't everybody become ambivalent to it all after awhile? I want the idea of friends, but the action of having them and maintaining them feels like I'm being eaten alive. The idea of seeking romance is nigh repulsive to me. I know what loneliness feels like, but do other people not feel like being around others is more painful than being lonely? I don't understand. I sincerely, truly, don't understand.
I'm rewatching Kamisama Kiss, for reference, and that's what prompted this, but I've been thinking about this in general for awhile now. I know no reality would compare to a shojo romance anime, but I'm watching it and thinking… wait, is this show supposed to be referencing a real emotion? Like it isn't just for the sake of fiction? This has to be some kind of mental illness. I was diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety as a teen, but that's it.
No. 2174740
>>2174727that sounds passive aggressive and mean. bringing up what someone shared with you that is clearly something very painful as a joke is cruel. i like teasing my friends but those things are too far. does she really even respect you? i've had friends who didn't really respect or understand me before, it's not a good feeling (but it was as a kid and i found it funny).
>>2174734this genuinely sounds like autism, lack of social understanding, alexythymia, lack of interest in romance (there's absolutely nothing wrong with this but a lot of autistic people have different views towards sex/relationships than other people). i was diagnosed with autism and do have the urge for friends, it's nice to see and be seen through connecting with others though i don't trust most people to understand me.
No. 2174744
>>2174734I also don't comprehend the feeling of loneliness, but I don't relate to your distress about it. I don't mind people being around me, but it doesn't cause me any psychological harm when they are gone. I actually prefer it. I love being utterly isolated for weeks at a time. I was unironically thriving in quarantine.
I also occasionally like to consume romance media for fun, but I never want a relationship IRL. I hate having to maintain relationships with anyone, even platonic ally. I hate sharing space with anyone. I can also turn the media off anytime I want a break, and drop it completely if I get bored of the character. Doing this IRL is…more complicated. It vexes me when I hear moids talk about how "Women aren't built to be alone!!! You'll regret choosing to be alone eventually!!!" Meanwhile they are the ones fantasizing about killing themselves just because they can't get a gf.
I have occasionally found IRL people attractive, but I have never had a crush or any feeling comparable to romance in media. It's possible that this is some kind of mental pathology, but it doesn't really cause me any issues.
The lack of desire for friendship is something I also relate to. Once again, I have no issue with interacting with people who just happen to be in the same room as me. I almost exclusively positive interactions with them. But once I'm home, I want them all to leave me alone. This is my space and my time to do what I want. No, I don't want to text or call. No, I don't want to hang out. Leave me alone.
No. 2174745
>>2174744*platonically
IDK why this word was split into two
No. 2174747
>>2174744Same anon. I don't usually post much, but it's rare for a topic to come up that I relate to in this way.
I honestly wish I could live like a ghost. Sometimes the childhood cartoons I watched would have an episode where the main character would become a ghost (usually as a parody of Ebeneezer Scrooge,) and be able to travel around and observe everything without interacting. This was always a source of anguish for the character, but I always thought it would be so nice.
Sometimes when I say this, people panic and assume I'm suicidal or something. It's actually the opposite - I love being alive and I want to experience everything. I literally wish I could live like a background character. I want to go everywhere and do everything, but never be noticed and never leave a trace.
I don't want a network of friends and family. I don't even think I want a home. I would love to be alone and drifting around forever.
I've thought about starting a thread for people like this, but I'm not sure how many people actually relate to it.
No. 2174750
>>2174747I understand this completely. I love the idea of being able to observe people without ever having to interact with them. Back when Omegle was alive, I'd use the questions feature all the time, just to watch two strangers talk. There's something so nice about the idea of doing things without having to be there for it. I like to go on walks at the very beginning of dawn, when nobody is awake, solely to look at the trees and fences like I'm the only person left on the planet.
I don't think there'd be enough people to make a thread for it, unfortunately. Even if there was enough, we aren't the types to interact with others, so I don't think it would be used much.
No. 2174752
>>2174750Yeah, the fact that we barely interact is what killed the thread idea lol
The only solution I could think of was to make it more of a "tips and tricks" type of thread, where we share advice for this lifestyle. For example- advice for living alone as a woman, fun new hobbies that don't involve other people, which jobs allow for minimal interaction and maximum mobility, etc.
I still think it would die out fairly quickly, though. However, a general "living alone" thread might be a good topic for this site. I'm sure plenty of us have interesting stories and good advice.
(integrate) No. 2174762
File: 1726984564760.jpeg (149.51 KB, 959x959, GXshpXHWsAA7Uql.jpeg)
my mom said some really terrible things to me in an argument tonight and essentially confirmed everything i was afraid she thought of me. she probably was just saying it to get a rise out of me, but i can't bring myself to see it that way. i don't think i'll ever forget. i don't know how to cope with being the black sheep of the family
No. 2174809
>>2174797Or if you just shitpost (like I did) and don't pander to the gendie crowd.
Gave up on Tumblr after the pornpocalypse cause that's when the troons started to shit up my feed.
No. 2174852
>>2173525Sorry for being sad about my friends I guess.
I just dislike how fast everyone moved from it, news included. It's like as if Rusia suddently stoped the war.
No. 2174898
File: 1727000557412.jpg (20.18 KB, 500x375, 1656109193298.jpg)
>bpd mom has some retarded drama with her husband's best/only friend because that friend didn't do a favor for her once
>tell her her husband is not going to defend her or confront his moid friend and will just drop some minimal lukewarm criticism at best
>suddenly switches her tune just to disagree with me and defend her husband, says "Well anon, it has nothing to do with him, I'm not really asking him to take stances or break off their friendship"
>next day, mom wanted her husband to show his moid friend something related to the drama
>he didn't
>instead her husband does exactly what I predicted
>she has an epic now 37 minute long meltdown, including both threatening to run away and doing the equivalent of grounding her husband
Kek told you so bitch.
No. 2175031
>>2174962What is it that you achieved
nonnie? Congratulations whatever it is.
No. 2175055
File: 1727012596622.jpg (20.63 KB, 564x460, 3f8b40b27655dd02f9513156f0720f…)
This year has been hell. One of the worst years of my life, up there in the top 5. I'm so fucking done that I've legitimately started praying and begging for something higher up to have mercy on me. I don't know what I have done to deserve this when all I wanted was stability. I'm not an arrogant person and I try my best to be kind to others and mind my business. I'm 26. I should be out there enjoying and laughing until my stomach hurts. Nowadays I can only drink coffee and try to resist the urge to drive to the edge of the country and disappear off the map. I just want things to get better. I want things to be stable again.
No. 2175085
File: 1727014796043.png (155.69 KB, 300x300, 1723768197999.png)
>Another date
>Another moid who's icks themselves out as soon as they hear my accent
I hate this but I'm not going to pretend I'm something I'm not.
No. 2175086
File: 1727014914248.jpg (199 KB, 1080x1080, 20240921_150301.jpg)
I want a fat ass but depression makes me too exhausted to exercise. And having an ugly body makes me more depressed. Make it end
No. 2175127
File: 1727017279459.gif (1.58 MB, 255x164, vihapulla.gif)
listening to my neighbors having loud sex for the 3rd time this weekend when it should be meeeeeeeee getting my back blown out
No. 2175134
>>2175128Samefag I'm not currently this loud but I'm still passionate lol.
Britfags and Irishfags please pop in and say we are the scum of the earth
No. 2175151
>>2175133I grew up in Ireland but currently living in England.
>>2175137Case in point. I'm decent, my family is decent but you're gonna tar us with the same shite.
No. 2175171
>>2175166Europe is united with their hate for gypsies
>>2175168KEK seethe
No. 2175207
>>2175205Nta but I think they’re cool too
nonny, gypsy men are very sweet
No. 2175218
>>2175203A bit ot but I feel like it's really funny that when I was a kid children books still had gypsies as evil witches who would turn naughty kids that were given away from their parents into donkeys.
I'm not even that old but I feel like it's one of those "back in my day" things.
No. 2175228
>>2175203deserved
>>2175205educate yourself. they aren't cool.
No. 2175234
>>2175230im guessing that person rarely interacts with gypsies because that is such a wild comment to make.''sweet'' lmfao what.
>>2175205you are lucky, gypsy communities are basically if you combined the criminal nature of detroit with the dirtiest indian city you could think of and that would be your average gypsy community and city. And you can't even use the racebait excuse for this one because gypsies can be white too.
(racebait) No. 2175242
File: 1727022152633.jpg (161.25 KB, 534x810, tumblr_34d7291c62b37b032a9a3cd…)
>>2175238Visual representation of bringing up your Nigel on lc
No. 2175243
>>2175232not you defending gypsies because the one you know happens to be adjusted.
I would greatly like to invite you to go visit gypsy communities in the balkans. There is a reason why these types of people are hated and it has nothing to do with racism.
No. 2175254
File: 1727022497675.webp (76.1 KB, 1400x955, IMG_3833.webp)
why are we talking about gypsies
No. 2175256
>>2175252Nta but explain what? have you read the previous replies about why gypsies deserve their hideous reputation? google it
>>2175254because of these anons
>>2175128 &
>>2175134 No. 2175258
>>2175254A
nonnie had a bad date because of her accent and here we are calling for genocide.
No. 2175262
>>2175258kek are you about to start caping for gypsies?
see
>>2175257 No. 2175270
>>2175242i typically don't care about anons bringing up their nigels, but the fact that anon is dating a gypsy and she doesn't care that she is LITERALLY dating a gypsy.
>>2175248yeah maybe burger gypsies are different but as a eurofag the gypsies are terrible and unironically xenophobic too which is funny because they live in literal filth, set dumpsters on fire because they like the smell, throw garbage all over a community that when you walk its literally a shit ton of garbage everywhere, rob everyone even poor people and broke taxi drivers, make their children work as beggars and pitpocketers, huge child abusers, pop out 7 children by the age of 16, etc etc and they out of all people still think they can discriminate against others. also what this anon said too
>>2175257>>2175249they are all bad no matter their ethnicity.
>>2175258Who was calling for genocide you literal schizophrenic.
>>2175264kek you should have your boyfriend take you to the gypsy streets of romania and live there short-term so you can experience the full gypsy experience. I would love for you to do that.
(derailing) No. 2175273
>>2175269What are you talking about nonna? Hes not irish kek
>>2175270I don’t think it’s necessary to immigrate to a shithole country just for fun, anon
No. 2175384
>>2175331If he wanna be silent to cause you distress so you'll come begging for him to talk to you again he's got the upper hand, so by giving him an ultimatum the pressure is back on him to initiate the talking.
It's VERY childish behavior so unless you're both at like early 20s at most this should be a massive red flag either way. But still, sometimes people do need some time to sleep on it and to think things through. In those cases the person should clearly communicate that need by saying something like "I need a few days to think, I'll come back when I'm ready to talk" rather than just ghosting.
No. 2175426
>>2175375Kek in my country they regularly illegaly occupy fields where they'll shit, piss, build shitty unsafe "houses" and burn
toxic substances but they'll get so violent that not even cops will go near their camps. Many of them stay around train stations all day to steal and they also make tiktoks about how cool they are and what they stole that day, I wish I was joking.
No. 2175464
>>2175455Also men who are apparently woke and feminist but seem to almost delight in and exaggerate the effects of the patriarchy to you because A. They find it reassuring to think the world benefits them more than it actually does. B. They are sadistic and want you to be unhappy.
Also what's up with them constantly quoting movies
No. 2175485
>>2175467CSA
>>2175469Thank you nonna, I’ll try this to see if it helps.
No. 2175532
File: 1727038185932.png (66.03 KB, 254x252, 278196488_401776458135945_3281…)
>have favorite mascot character since forever
>Shop gets some cute stamps with them on it
>Sells out immediately because it's trendy rn
I hate this shit so much it's unreal. Half the things I like are trends atm and it makes me annoyed that I have to unironcally fight consoomer retards for shit they did not give a fuck about before. I hate tiktok and I hate retarded consoomers who ruin the market completely I WAS HERE FIRST REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
No. 2175534
>>2175499there's books called the now habit and procrastination equation i recall them having good advice
https://commoncog.com/a-user-review-of-the-procrastination-equation/review of a book
No. 2175594
File: 1727041876230.jpg (1.59 MB, 4032x3024, IMG_0174.JPG)
>>2173017she just was put down a few hours ago, we had a vet come and she was very nice. my first time losing a pet. it hurts that the last time she looked at me, licked my face was the last times. she is gone now. i'm just glad she is no longer suffering, today was her half birthday at 9 and a half years old. i was rubbing her ears and felt them get cold pretty quick when she injected her. sad but she is in a better place. pic because i've posted her on lc before, this was long before she got sick. rip
No. 2175611
File: 1727043100179.jpg (1.23 MB, 4032x3024, RQSI2667.JPG)
>>2175606i like what you said and i agree. for all the pain the death of a pet brings, they bring ten times more joy while you get to live with them in your life and get to know them. i was telling my dad that it was sad remembering both of us standing watching out the front door for the lady to bring her to us when she was a puppy, our first dog we begged my mom for one for years. and she left out the same front door today. she became my mom's little baby companion and followed her around everywhere and my mom loved her so much. she loved to sunbathe by the pool while my mom read a book. i like to think she is sunbathing now. my bf grew up always having a dog and has lost many and he was with us today, very sweet of him to tell them that his dogs are playing with her now too.
No. 2175624
>>2175476My fantasies with my husbando be like
>>2175551The next time you beat yourself up over what a ball-sweater said, remember that moids never know what they want and are currently killing themselves en masse (or at least threatening to) just because they can't breathe the same air as us.
No. 2175713
>>2175711Nona please exhaust all other options you may have. Therapy and medication
can work. Finding the right therapist and doctor is essential. If you have access to it please try.
No. 2175717
File: 1727048940911.jpeg (77.72 KB, 736x558, IMG_4814.jpeg)
i know it’s stupid but it makes me want to scream. i hate how yuri isn’t as popular as yaoi and how any decent ships or characters get ruined by stupid tranny shit. i stumble upon an interesting artist? yeah, he / they lesbian, dicks and top surgery scars everywhere. i stumble upon a fanfic with decent plot? yeah, trannies again, “ummm guys she’s actually a trans lesbian!!”. i even tried to distance myself from western fandoms and got into chinese baihe novels. turns out, it’s actually worse there. no english translations of seemingly decent novels, no english licenses for popular fan translated novels, little to no fanart. i don’t like most male characters, i do not relate to them and i do not want to read about them; i wish a lot of popular danmei would just be about women. like, a god & her devoted follower, a stupid neet who got transported into a fantasy novel and is now living her dream life with her hot demon wife, and so on… like it just would be so much better! i want to scream. please god oh please let there be more content made by women for women ABOUT women. that’s all i want.
No. 2175792
File: 1727054297029.jpg (29.58 KB, 563x590, 460fd9bb23fb3f32c2fe42a562f881…)
>>2175774I feel the same way. I just want to be free.
No. 2175796
File: 1727054427405.jpeg (625.97 KB, 850x947, B014CEFD-3BCA-4675-96F1-03E5DD…)
>>2175774That’s a pretty common reaction when you’re depressed. What’s going on anon?
No. 2175805
>>2172675i keep having dreams that my boyfriend will cheat on me, and its only because i was cheated on by the only other partner i ever had and because of my deep insecurities that play peek-a-boo from time to time. its probably also important to mention my ex was very mentally disturbed and i was young and naive. i dont like that my mind assumes my boyfriend will cheat, and despite how most of the nonnies here argue such things are bound to happen, i dont think its healthy to let it consume me. hes never done anything of the sort, he doesnt watch porn, hes very committed to his studies and family, and its unfair that my mind has such worries. i see stick thin girls sometimes with their makeup done in little outfits and i worry what if one day he begins to like that? and it eats me up every few months, these fears. it wastes my time. i wonder if i should get lip filler, stop eating as much, do my makeup more. when i say it, i realize how pathetic it is and how it doesnt align with my values, but i just want to feel pretty beyond for him. i want to feel that confidence and security and love myself though im certain i could change everything in the world about my appearance and it still wouldnt help. id still complain about something. i just wonder if those girls are really more fulfilled, i wonder if its deceptive and trying to drag me in for evil intent when my life is so wonderful outside of this self hatred
No. 2175937
>>2175822i didn’t know that server existed! i’m now genuinely curious, thank you nonna. also yes, that’s one of the main reasons i decided to look into Chinese GL. i might start learning the language just to be able to read those novels…
>>2175779thank you! i will definitely check her work out.
No. 2176037
File: 1727086067928.gif (150.84 KB, 400x267, 1706428353667.gif)
Just got woken up by mum. It wouldn't have been so bad but she decided to pop in when I spent last night having a steamy love affair with a big old bottle of Smirnoff. Nothing better to start your Monday than seeing your useless alco daughter covered in her own piss. I feel bad that she's associated with me. I feel bad that anyone is.
At least she got me up so I can have my biweekly teams meeting with my manager in 25 mins. Just gotta blah blah for a while and my black hole of existence will continue getting money.
No. 2176058
File: 1727089542300.png (367.67 KB, 480x349, jodi art.png)
the normalfags will not make me conform to society. I am going to keep on hatin'. Fuck them.
No. 2176061
I've had it with my cousin. They already own a dog that she wanted (just so happens to look like mine, surprise dumb bitch mine were outliers, you went and got a livestock dog you idiot.) So since she was pissed that her dog didn't want to spend time with her, is rather withdrawn and does his own shit. Instead of actually going to training etc, that was left to her mom. And now her mom has a super close bond to the dog— of course!— and she was pissed bc it didn't just end up like mine that are big but super cuddly and sweet and want to learn bc they love me since ive had them for 8 years! No, that wasn't good enough so now after she already had a suspended license bc of amphetamine and weed she went and got herself a bully dog, that her current bf isn't allowed to keep in his home. 7 months, has experienced violence before. Then she tells me, yes, cant leave her alone so she puts her in a crate. One she already ruined and I'm just at my wits end here. I told her very strongly that she is setting that dog up for failure. Going to end up at the shelter in a few years and no-one will take her like any other barely trained bully breed overflowing our shelters.
I was rather stern and direct with her and she's been ignoring my messages ever since.
I don't know if i did the right thing, but she's a damn adult now and needs to think before she acts. "Oh dog destroys so much so when i go on a walk i lock her in a crate." So youre going for a walk and don't bring your dog?? What the fuck am I reading. She's a bully breed, she needs intense working, attention and to keep her boredom at bay.
I'm at such a loss. I feel bad for being too direct maybe but i truly worry for that dog.. what do you do?
No. 2176066
>>2176061I've been trying to tell them for years they got an entire livestock dog— a dog that's job it is to live with livestock— of course it barely listens to normal dog shit. It just doesn't have a job and thats why he takes off, would rather sleep outside and listens to his own gut. That's a whole livestock dog. Why the fuxk would you pick a dog that just looks like my 3, but not inform yourself. I can literally see that it's a livestock breed. This has been bizarre before even. Meant to name her daughter after me, keeps pulling me down in front of my mom for nothing, js bc I have my own life and farm and shit hours from them.. "oh,
nonnie looks so bad!", "oh does
nonnie feel okay being by herself in the country? Oh, can she even manage?" "Cousin make sure you don't end up like
nonnie."
This has been a competition all my life i neither knew about nor signed up for. And still they won't leave me the fuck alone. Fuuuuuck and a dog will suffer yet again.
No. 2176071
>>2176061>>2176066I feel so bad for the dogs but fuck the humans, let your cousin be a spiteful piece of shit and find out where it takes her. I'm amazed at how spineless you're being about this. Go beg cousin for her help since she's sooo good with dogs, ask her to train yours because your dogs never destroy the house and you've always wanted an aggressive furniture obliterator.
Or just ignore her completely and let her dog use her as a chew toy. It's not your job to baby retarded relatives, she has parents to do that for her. You have a fucking farm to run, she can't seriously expect you to sit by the phone twiddling your thumbs until she messages you demanding to be spoon fed.
No. 2176073
>>2176066an
actual farmer
nonny.. you sound really cool
No. 2176078
>>2176071I am being pretty spineless I admit. I just haven't had a good relationship with them for a while.. I guess since my cousin dove into drugs, ruined my flat (two times!) I thought i was doing a good thing giving her a place to crash. She literally pulled out my sex toys to show her friends, I've never felt as humiliated with someone i trusted. But her mom defended her i just started disappearing.. never got an apology i didn't specifically ask for. Technically even my cousin is being set up for failure. Just can't keep quiet when she sends me pictures and wants me to congratulate her as if i didn't notice her throw her first dog to the wayside.. when she mentioned the "box" i fucking lost it. She's the literal reason dogs like that are fucked in the long run.. now she's doing the "adult" thing by just ignoring me. Fucking hell what a mess. I still want her to feel comfortable to reach out to me, walking that line isn't easy. I worry about her too, now just a dog makes it even worse all together. She'd be the kind of person that surrenders it again.. our shelters are full of mistreated and barely trained bullies. I am frustrated.
Thank you for listening, i apologise for ranting I'm just so lost and both angry. Poor dog, so sweet and cute but literally destined to fail.
No. 2176092
>>2175031>>2175092Thank you both! I don't want to specify and de-anon myself as it's rather niche but I had gotten my hands on a holy grail item in a near-lifelong collecting hobby of mine and finally completed a sort of sub-collection(?) with it.
Again, it's small, but I had been dreaming of it for so long. I keep getting the urge to bring it up to my friends again because I'm still over the moon about it but I'm afraid of coming across as obnoxious now. At least the happiness will probably last longer than those urges.
No. 2176225
>>2176222I think your feelings are
valid. When my friends talk about how they're excited over stuff I don't give a fuck about I still at least pretend to be enthusiastic I feel like that's a normal thing to do.
No. 2176354
>>2176341>people with bpd constantly play victim>my cluster b family made me this way>my tumblrina friends made me this way>they normalized this behaviorNot to be rude but you're still kind of playing into the bpd
victim complex.
No. 2176376
>>2176346Wow, I'm 21 and people think I'm in my 30's! Lucky you nonita
>>2176316I'm almost 22 too, I haven't glewn up yet but I think I'm getting there
No. 2176378
>>2176338This is so true, we have no idea how long our generation is going to live. Considering the new discoveries in biology, it seems that in 10-15 years it can become possible to be functionally immortal or at least live longer than anyone would actually want.
>>2176316All this ageism nonsense that is pushed on us is based on the length of life of our grandparents. Don't give into it. People are maturing much slower, look how young everyone looks compared to the same age 20-30 years ago. Look how many people in their 60s and 70s are picking up weight lifting (you should do it if you haven't already, I'm really pissed off I only started a year ago) and becoming more physically capable than many 20-something's
No. 2176449
>>2176427thank you, it really is difficult to find people who understand because most people come from households where their self esteem was nurtured at least a little bit. most people will just see you as a mess so i keep my issues to myself now for the most part. the only reason i was able to wake up is due to my partner who i met at my worst and his reaction was complete shock at how badly i let these people affect me.
>>2176431i've actually been told that feeling extreme anger as you wake up and start to realize you deserved better is normal and any fears of being a narcissist that i have is just me not understanding what normal self esteem is supposed to feel like. trust me, i've been scared of that outcome before and have spent a lot of time scrutinizing my behaviors, feeling like i'm just a covert narc who needs to keep my self esteem low to prevent hurting others.
No. 2176453
>>2176449Good. I was told that I am passive and lack accountability because I'm pointing fingers at everyone. After spending years to change my way of thinking and putting responsibility where it belonged instead of thinking I had complete control over the situation I was told that I am a histrionic narcissist. I'm never seeing a psychiatrist again kek
The fear of becoming like them and the constant second guessing is something I relate to very deeply.
No. 2176460
>>2176454Imo something that doesn't help is mental health shit becoming SO mainstream that it's constantly misused. It's pretty annoying how
everybody on the internet now diagnoses their opps with BPD/NPD based on the pettiest bullshit imaginable kek
No. 2176464
>>2176454nta a lot of people have the tendency to protect and look for excuses for people who are downright
abusive and destructive and I will never understand that. BPD people are very aware of what they are doing and how they are making other people feel. They just think their own "suffering"- which they fuel and intensify themselves on their own with no reason other than to keep freaking out, is more important than everyone else's and they always need other people to regulate their own emotions and do absolutely nothing to learn that themselves.
No. 2176468
>>2176460this is true too. i noticed a lot of moids in particular will always throw "bpd!!" at a woman who is slightly more emotional than the average person. i think letting mental health be mainstream isn't inherently abad thing if it encourages people to get help, but then i notice those with bpd/eds/stuff similar will find communities on like twitter where it's a hivemind and there is no focus on recovery or getting better
>>2176464makes me wonder how much bpd/npd are misdiagnosed for each other or are comorbidites
No. 2176501
>>2176468Don't forget the hordes of people claiming that everyone who is slightly rude or indifferent towards you is a NARCISSIST trying to LEECH ON YOUR GOOD VIBES kek. "Top 10 ways to instantly detect a narcissist" and then they either describe a cartoon villain or someone who is just kind of an asshole.
>>2176494Probably. But, once you consider how difficult it is to get cluster bees to accept treatment compared with the success rates of behavioural therapy, it kinda makes me wonder if some of the patients actually just needed to learn better coping mechanisms for something else that was affecting their behaviour. That being said I am FAR from a professional so I can't really comment on this besides tinfoil.
No. 2176553
File: 1727122560089.jpg (8.57 KB, 236x286, de464e82db8bab9a4711294b804549…)
I OVERATE TODAY FUCK MY DIET IS RUINED IM STILL A FATTY FAT FAT
No. 2176640
File: 1727127012824.jpeg (424.95 KB, 985x1920, IMG_7358.jpeg)
>>2176468The only BPD person I’ve seen actually put effort into getting better made a comic about just that. Large
toxic mental health circles just become an enabling circlejerk because it feels better to feel like everyone else is the problem.
No. 2176647
>>2176640> These guys really need to cheer upKek that's exactly how I feel when I make the mistake of checking out "communities" with my disorder. I can't stand the constant self-pity and "THEY'LL BE
REEEEALLY SORRY WHEN I KILL MYSELF" posts.
No. 2176733
File: 1727130595958.jpeg (44.3 KB, 575x411, IMG_4750.jpeg)
Fuck I’m tired. How do people do this five days a week, every week?
No. 2176743
File: 1727131201514.png (35.42 KB, 275x199, 1717270454245.png)
My mom wants me to order her this radiation detox tea. I'm tired of her throwing money at this type of shit. She just spent money buying nicotine patches and gum. It adds up so fast because it's never just one thing, no, it's multiple. I want to break her tablet and force her off the internet.
No. 2176755
>>2174859The truth is that people want someone to judge and label as less than, no matter how "woke" they are. They use working class people as scapegoats because they see them all as evil, ignorant bigots, which means it's okay to hate them. To this type of people, all rich people are open-minded and kind, and all poor people are closed-minded and sociopathic.
That bothers me a lot. We as a demographic don't have anyone on our side.
No. 2176872
File: 1727135473177.gif (103.2 KB, 498x498, IMG_7654.gif)
Waiting for a friend or someone in my family to call me and say happy birthday. There’s still a few hours left in the day!
No. 2176873
>>2176872Happy birthday!
People who get a lot of birthday messages are usually the ones who talk about it, if you didn't let anyone know, it's not surprising they don't know. It's not because they don't like you, it's just that memorizing all your friend's bdays is impossible. Do you know all of theirs by heart?
No. 2176889
File: 1727136033830.jpg (134.99 KB, 675x1200, 1000014045.jpg)
>>2176799Wishing you the best right now, maybe you could commemorate her in some way in one of the games?
>>2176848Sorry nona, I hope you wake up feeling better tomorrow and you're met with more kindness.
>>2176872Not a friend or family member, but happy birthday! You three should treat yourself to some cake pops.
No. 2176900
File: 1727136462382.gif (1.42 MB, 435x500, happee birthdae.GIF)
>>2176872Happy birthday nonita, remember to make a wish!
>>2176889Shit now I’m craving cake pops so bad
No. 2176916
File: 1727137436916.png (22.32 KB, 303x258, 633653286.png)
>>2176872Happy bday nonners!!
No. 2176962
File: 1727140007080.jpg (54.58 KB, 1200x675, nazOEICWSwqtSJ7T.jpg)
>>2176932Guys we gotta break down the door and help her!!
No. 2176970
File: 1727140462178.jpg (35.7 KB, 750x544, 1000065468.jpg)
I feel like my problem is that I take things at face value and that's why o have a hard time explaining myself, I also have been having issues with my speaking, i stumble over my own words, lately I've been kind of "Yoda speaking"? Which is weird because I've never did this before, like I say the secondary phrase or part of a sentence first and then the first part, like.
>oh yeah, to the mall, I went there
I don't get it, I didn't do this before, maybe it's because of the around 2 years I spent at home not going out at all? But it's weird, I would still speak with online friends, sure, it was in English and not Spanish but that's speaking too, isn't it?
And my social battery is so weird, aomet it's really, really low and I need to stay away from others and sometimes I'm okay and I can have fun.
The thing is, that even by text I have a hard time explaining what's going on in my head, which isn't much but still, and now my friend is getting mad at me because I have a hard time saying eloquent shit, it's like my brain shuts down and doesn't know how to respond at all.
No. 2176997
File: 1727140938895.gif (101.36 KB, 373x498, cri-cat.gif)
>>2176934It's so hard to hear some people still have mothers when they hit 60…
No. 2177142
File: 1727145124123.jpg (581.24 KB, 1000x667, 1000_F_147507617_emv3ZhNZF7swz…)
Had a miserable day at work, management asked me to stay late making it a 12hr shift (that I don't get overtime for), I really wanted to get food and work on a project or watch a movie to relax. But I'm so tired I've just been staring at the ceiling for an hour. Maybe I'll have a nice dream at least. Good night.
No. 2177160
File: 1727145956911.jpeg (429.17 KB, 1125x688, 63AE5766-F779-4220-9307-B91658…)
>>2176997ntayrt but I’m also a member of the dead parent club. I’m still in my 20’s and am the only one in my age range who has gone through this irl. I’m really bitter that people around me can celebrate life milestones with their entire family because they’re still alive. It’s really hard and I don’t think it will ever stop being hard, but there will be days where it’s easier too. They loved you and no amount of time passing will ever change that nona
No. 2177237
File: 1727150658458.jpg (48.93 KB, 735x801, 1726637174427.jpg)
Another night I'll be spending crying due to not having just been born a more normal person. Instead, my family thinks I'm a lazy, unmotivated piece of shit. It feels very bad seeming so high functioning.
No. 2177301
File: 1727152963473.png (234.33 KB, 732x648, hulu.png)
Oh fuck right off
No. 2177310
File: 1727153901276.gif (648.4 KB, 200x178, 200w.gif)
>>2177301Arr anon, go to the piracy subreddit and check their megathread. They have a whole list of trusted streaming sites for movie and tv shows. Scroll to the streaming section, the ones with the goat emoji next to it are the best ones. I've been using braflix and nunflix.
https://old.reddit.com/r/Piracy/wiki/megathread/movies_and_tv No. 2177414
I was forced to make an instagram after many years without one to survive socially and academically at my new university. I nuked everything on my previous one from high school years ago, and quit social media since. With this new one, I used it for a few weeks to follow people from my new university, the campus accounts for updates and events, and so on. Then for some fucking reason today the algorithm caught wind of who I was, and blasted me with suggestions of dozens of people from my past and high school, and I nearly had a full on panic attack because half of these people contributed to my mental illness and bullying, and I hadn’t spoken to in years. For fuck’s sake. Forget it, I don’t wanna use this shit anymore. Even just seeing their names and blurry icons made my stomach drop. I want to be dead to these people, and I don’t want them to know I’m alive either. Hell, I don’t want to know that they’re alive either. I had put all that behind me. I don’t wanna think about how they might be happy or successful or whatever now. I had forgotten about most of them. I only made one of these stupid things so I could join a study group, and instead got hit with a bout of such severe panic I haven’t felt in some time. I think I tinkered with settings correctly so they shouldn’t be recommended me, but I hate feeling like this. Why the fuck is social media so important to existing in social settings, why the fuck do I have to feel like this about people from my past, ugh.
No. 2177474
File: 1727166449926.jpg (137.68 KB, 1170x1448, stupidhamster.jpg)
>start uni
>my therapist wants me to do this! I will challenge my severe social anxiety and depression!
>skulk around not talking to anyone and looking at the ground, terrified 24/7
>some people tried talking to me in the beginning but they started to realize I'm a complete sperg weirdo , especially in groups
I don't know why I expect things to be different when I keep doing the same thing. I'm so socially behind and afraid that I'm not in a state to even begin socializing. I can barely go outside without anxiety, as soon as another person is in my vicinity I become so anxious I forget how to walk
I'm so disappointed in myself for doing this for my entire life, I'm letting my therapist down and I've cemented my status as the tragic autist with a school shooter vibe
It doesn't even matter that my school and class has a lot of weirdos - I always, without fail, feel that I'm the most unlikable and socially stunted person in the group
Is it even possible to come back from the amount of bullying, parental neglect and growing up isolated that I've experienced? I'm an autist to begin with but I feel like life just fucked me, irreparably, and I am not capable of existing with other people. At all. And yet, I feel extremely sad about this, so I want it to change - but when I am put in any social situation, but ESPECIALLY groups in a school setting, I just freeze and play dead and go mute
I'm so sad my life is like this. I'm almost 30 and I'm a terrified 8-year-old still
No. 2177490
>>2177474i used to be 100% exactly that way, hated socializing, being in groups, talking etc. it got better. you probably think me getting better means i'm inherently less spergy, and maybe you're right, but i bet you could do it too, it just takes time. i fought the urge to put my head down until it got slightly easier, i pretended i didn't cringe when talking, i tricked and gaslit myself into becoming more confident. most important part: listen to people, be attentive, get interested. if you still don't gaf about them go find someone else.
No. 2177665
File: 1727182504109.jpeg (50.02 KB, 500x346, IMG_4538.jpeg)
>>2177663
No. 2177748
>be me in 2020, i was 17
>getting groomed by a pedo since 15
>get taken from my home by cps because of neglectful parents
>get leukemia, as if all that wasn't enough
>have trauma from it all
>during my hospitalization i make a new online friend
>she's a little older and from another country
>she's had sexual trauma since age 4 and yet
>she was always strong, ambitious, resilient and had a heart of gold
>she convinced me to leave my groomer and helped me emotionally recover from everything
>she saved me from suicide twice
>always was there for me and we were best friends
>fast-forward to now
>have several unopened messages from her
>don't open them out of lazyness
>open them 3 hrs later, turns out she overdosed 2 days ago, slept 2 days and then overdosed again today
>call police in her country but i only have her name, village and number, not her address
All i can do is wait now. She hasn't contacted me back and it's been 4 hours. She could be dead right now, what makes me scared is that I took way too long to answer her and police will take a long time to find her, and in such situations every second counts. The worst thing is that she overdosed because her fiancé cheated on her. The strongest woman I know might be gone because of a man. I want him dead
No. 2177774
File: 1727190772268.jpg (23.21 KB, 735x540, 1000029363.jpg)
I've been taking antidepressants for a few months and my doctor prescribed me a higher dosage that I will start taking in a few days. I feel strangely excited about it. Am I a drug addict now? I'm kind of scared.
No. 2177784
>>2177780This is what people have done to me my whole life. I'm constantly being sent memes or songs. When I feel the desire to have someone genuinely close to me and fully invested in my life. It's incredibly distant.
In my case. Everyone's been doing this to me.
No. 2177820
>>2177814Rent a room closer to the uni you study the thing you love, obviously.
>>2177818Microdose magic mushrooms, supplement other mushrooms like lions mane extract
No. 2177837
>>2177831I know the feeling. You can improve. Just take one day at a time. You know where you want to go that's good. Do some breathwork sessions on youtube to reduce feeling overwhelmed.
>>2177832Sorry to hear that but don't give into the thought you can't be fixed. Self talk is a powerful thing. If you keep convincing yourself nothing works, it really won't. Try learning tai chi forms start with 8 and 24, they improve memory greatly. Give yourself enough time and affirm that you are improving every day by talking to yourself in the mirror and write in a journal by hand (typing is not good for this and doesn't have as many beneficial effects)
No. 2177846
I feel so goddamn exhausted all the time. The worst part is, I can't tell if it's mental or physical? I've probably got every test done under the sun, plenty of tests done for my heart, blood tests, CT scans and MRIs of my chest, abdomen, and pelvis, etc, there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. Yet I'm so fucking tired all the time. I drink a small cup of coffee in the morning because it gives me some energy (and happiness, I feel truly happy when I have the energy to do things) but it also leaves me feeling more tired when it wears off. I'm so sleepy, detached, and numb all the time and it sucks. Not having energy to do things, yet not being able to sleep the day away, is one of the worst feelings in the world.
I'm fit (but still at a healthy body fat), I eat well, I workout, and it's actually depressing that there are severely overweight people and old people who have more energy than me.
No. 2177858
>>2177847I'm sorry to hear that, it seems your nervous system was in overdrive for a long time, this is a natural reaction to long term stress from what I found out from having similar experiences. Try the video I'm posting for a few days and see if there's an improvement. It helped me a lot when I had similar issues.
I also heard that you should delay coffee until 90 minutes after waking up to not crash later on. Going out in the sun in the morning also helps.
>>2177847 No. 2177891
>>2177237see
>>2177858 we all can change
No. 2177963
File: 1727203118484.png (3.32 MB, 3840x2025, pexels-photo-7698681.png)
>>2177956Can you give an example of a situation where your emotions are difficult to regulate?
No. 2177983
>>2177956This
>>2177858helps a lot with regulating emotions! Or other types of breathwork (the guy has a lot of different ones in the channel but there are other channels if you don't like him or he
triggers you). I also had to learn how to regulate emotions at 30+. I know it's hard and can make you feel retarded. It's a skill that is acquired over time. Doing breathwork, yoga and weight lifting daily has helped me so much, it took me a couple of years but it's definitely worth the effort, now I am calm most of the time, even before my period and I used to have extreme mood swings in the past. There is nothing wrong with you. You probably just didn't have a good role model to learn it from.
No. 2177987
File: 1727204194248.jpg (26.49 KB, 564x537, 3ebcaa834b19da40341a3d3812ebce…)
Tfw I'm an actual bisexual woman who has never dated a man and has no desire to do so, is exclusively only attracted to women and has only dated women too but yet all thanks to the bihets and fakebians every time I try approaching an actual lesbian I get judged like crazy the second I announce my sexuality. Not like I blame them but please I'm so sick of the bihets too, every bisexual woman I tried starting something with ditched me for some dick which almost made me go crazy. Even my ex gf secretly cheated on me twice to fuck a moid while I was making heart eyes at her. I'd never call myself a lesbian because it feels vile to say you are one despite having an attraction to moids but the posers have ruined bisexuality forever I cannot take it anymore nonnas!!!!!! I just want to date, love and fuck a woman who's also genuinely only interested in women
No. 2178005
File: 1727205013287.jpg (235.16 KB, 680x450, 1000016946.jpg)
Something is consuming me and taking my life away from me. I'm going to be stuck like this forever. At this point. The whole world has taken everything that I had left away from me. I do not wish this upon anybody.
No. 2178009
>>2177963When I feel I'm being criticised, when I feel embarrassed, when I feel something is unfair, when I am sad etc.. as a kid I'd freak out and start screaming and throwing shit over the smallest things and in front of everyone and anyone. Now it doesn't happen often but as I said it's because I avoid the feelings, if I try to deal with them I can't control myself. It only happens in front of my partner because we live together and I can't always run away. I'm afraid it's going to ruin our relationship, he's actually scared of me and feels he has to walk on eggshells. I hate myself for that because my own ex put me through the same shit.
>>2177972I've never heard of that, I've done CBT for OCD, is it similar? I have to look into that. But yes, you're probably right it could be related to trauma. I grew up in a household with a lot of screaming and shouting and being "disciplined" with spanking and violence. My siblings turned out normal but I have other mental issues and my first serious relationship was with a mentally
abusive and probably narcissistic guy, so maybe that's why I wasn't so lucky.
>>2177983It's difficult for me to follow instructions while being relaxed because I'm deaf/HoH and need subtitles lol but thank you. It makes me hopeful to hear you've managed and that I can still change myself. I recently signed up for a workout class for women, I was supposed to go today but my face was swollen and my head pounding from my recent anger outburst so… Lol. Next time. I've been thinking of talking to my doctor too but I feel like I've spent all my youth being diagnosed and undiagnosed, going in and out of psych and I'm just dreading the thought of doing it all again, but I still have so many issues to deal with, so it's probably for the best. I need to figure out the best tools to deal with this before I ruin everything for myself.
No. 2178079
File: 1727207712093.jpg (216.47 KB, 768x768, 1000016923.jpg)
I don't wish my life upon anyone on this planet.
No. 2178109
spotting for a week, thought it was from ovulation at first, but it never really stopped. Now I'm getting my period (on time). I had first divorce hearing last week so that's probably why.
Now my ex is unleashing holy terror and threats and I don't understand exactly how the process here (EU) works and why he's allowed to do this shit. He was pronounced 100% guilty at the hearing (he didn't even attend it).
I talked about this situation in the spring, it involves domestic abuse, identity theft, fraud, and severe financial abuse. I have the top divorce lawyer in the country (financed by a loan) but jesus christ I still don't even understand why there was no clear instructions from the judge to stop fucking with basic needs in my life.
I need to apply to more jobs but today I'm just fucking dead. Cramping, depressed, exhausted. I work all the time, either on the case (did all the calculations and money tracing myself to avoid extra costs), on figuring out all the shit he did, on applications, on therapy, and sometimes on my doctoral dissertation, which is overdue but tbh I will raise hell if the university tries to give me problems about it. I have a lot of documentation about what I'm going through and my work is good.
I hate that he can still make me feel so afraid even from thousands of miles away. I hope he spends the rest of his life slaving away to pay, he's a useless abuser and pervert rapist who is now trying to make me lose my right to live here. It's hard to stay calm even though I have been consulting with women's organizations to help (I stayed in a DV shelter for awhile). it is all so exhausting. His family must not give one fuck about me. Mommy gives him everything he wants.
No. 2178222
>>2178109>I don't understand exactly how the process here (EU) works and why he's allowed to do this shitcourt systems are truly antiquated and easily weaponized by
abusive men to terrorize their female partners. look at the french court terrorizing gisele pelicot. men never cared about women being abused and it's mostly women working in domestic abuse that have lead to improvements for abused women.
No. 2178233
How come someone can just lie to your face
How can they just mistreat you and forget all about it
call you ugly because you're not his taste of porn of the week, then blame you for not interpreting him calling you ugly the right way
sending you porn, then blaming you for not being someone he can "confide" into and for not interpreting it as a call for help
pretend he is allowed to do anything to you since his dad is richer than yours (what kind of achievement is that supposed to be when his dad beats him up and kicks him out?????)
threaten to contact your family with your nudes, but oh you should have known he wasn't going to do it
now you're not sending anything anymore and you're not trustful in the bedroom. How come!! Well he's sexually frustrated now. Better go watch porn, more fun!
insist he'll go on and try finding a "replacement" for you, then oh but you shouldve read through it as him trying to catch your attention
no, hes never bad, oh nonooo, you're just misunderstanding! you're paranoid!!!
and oooohh he's such a victim! everyone's abandoning him! poor little thing!
how can someone just lie to your face like that over and over, it's beyond me
I've never met someone this awful and hopefully never will again
I wasted my time, I wasted my first times, I wasted my hopes, now I'm jaded, disillusioned, disgusted, resentful
May this hatred fuel me to become a better person
If it simply does its job keeping me away from this loser, it'll be good enough
how did i take so much shit
i fucking hate you and it's all deserved,not that you care, you just want someone to advise you on how to pass as normal
No. 2178247
File: 1727217855527.jpeg (21.85 KB, 275x184, IMG_2125.jpeg)
CRAAAAAMPS
No. 2178252
File: 1727218055244.jpeg (161.99 KB, 736x980, IMG_2586.jpeg)
I’ve become way more angry than my body can take. This amount of seething exceeds the amount of stress your body should have. I’m tired of going everywhere and not being able to say what I want without censorship, moderation and alteration. In my real life it’s like all of the words that have been bottled up inside of me are rising to the surface and I can’t stop it anymore. Things that used to make me feel better don’t anymore, they’re just empty distractions, even walking and physical activity doesn’t get rid of this suppression and rage I feel practically every day.
No. 2178265
>>2178256One time I saw my sister tickle her boyfriend’s dick (albeit through his pants) under the table and I still haven’t fully processed it
>>2178263Nona this gave me a good chuckle and I relate as a cat owner
No. 2178419
>>2177871Need more information. Do you mean that he-
(A) Just doesn't know anything about clothes and dresses like a randomized sim?
(B) Purposefully follows an extremely ugly fashion trend?
Problem A is common among men, and can often be remedied. Problem B is more challenging.
No. 2178486
>>2178136same here
nonny i hate my family and being alive
No. 2178601
i guess i am still prone to feeling lonely every so often. tonight it came back particularly hard due to some new life adjustments. what is not new is that i go to university online, have a long term long distance boyfriend i visit every couple of months, and do side work from home or clients homes. simply put i am very isolated, but have been this way for most of my life. i do things to get out so that is not the problem, and although i wish i had friends i find it very hard to relate to them. many girls in their early 20s have full time jobs, live on their own or with a partner, have children, or they party. the people i could maybe find like me are just as hidden as i am. i know. icant be so picky, but i also dont know how id meet someone. and it seems the only time this bothers me is when i let it, when i think of societys standards, when i begin to feel ashamed. but when i dont think of any of that, and i focus on my animals and family, when i do little things during my off periods and keep busy im just so grateful and content, and the lonely feelings almost never come around. oh, tonight its just hard. i just feel really ashamed to be living at home, to be friendless, to be so isolated and shy. i check lc for an hour a day just to feel as though i have a community and to catch up on events going on in the world or online. but if it werent for the comparison to societys standards i wouldnt feel this shame sometimes. i get to cook and garden and clean the home as my rent payment and read and have hobbies and go places and i work and go to uni, its just unconventional, thats all. but i probably should learn to speak up a bit more for myself and build more self esteem.
No. 2178630
>>2178601I don't think it's standards or comparison.
I think it's an unhealthy way of living that's been normalised by the covid lockdowns.
No. 2178634
>>2178630nta but i knew this was gonna be Isolation
luv u
nonnie great taste
No. 2178708
File: 1727236954938.jpeg (46.23 KB, 540x607, A274214C-4B7C-4590-8E24-453F50…)
Was talking with my friends about people pressuring themselves till their breaking point and I slipped and told them about how I did the same to my last suicide attempt and I feel liberated in a way but also very bad and guilty at the same time since it feels like I just “dropped the bomb” even though they were very reassuring and such aaaaaaAaaaa
No. 2178797
File: 1727240786499.jpeg (32.36 KB, 720x960, IMG_8065.jpeg)
I'm starting to feel guilty for having resentment towards my boyfriend's mum. She's currently living with us after she separated from his dad. She hasn't found a place yet, and it seems like she isn't doing the effort to find one.
She moved in earlier this month and to this day, there are still plenty of boxes in the living that she keeps insisting she'll take care of.
She proceeds to make me do drive her to places because we live far from anything and she doesn't know how to drive.
She has a drinking problem and has stolen alcohol under our nose until I actually caught her in the act and my boyfriend confronted her.
We went out to a national park and there was 0 data or anything. She got pissed at her son, but also at ME for not telling her?
First of all, why the fuck should we tell you anything, you're in our home, and we're grown. Second of all, you are not related to me, so do not give me attitude, what the fuck.
Whenever she washes the dishes, she leaves them greasy, it's barely washing at this. I have to go and rewash whatever she washes because it's filthy.
She also likes to remove the sink drain thing, so food starts going down the sink.
She has this thing where she puts butter in. Every time she puts in above where the cups are, and I bring it down cause wtf don't do that. One day I stopped out of anger, and she is so drunk she doesn't realise that it's up there and pulls out another dish of butter so now there are two.
I've confronted my boyfriend, he says it's going to be 1 month, and I'm counting down the days, however by the looks of it, she's not doing the search or has yet done any visits to places to move to. I'm about to quit my job and move back to my parents until she leaves, I literally cannot take this anymore.
I cried to my mum about it. My anxiety and PTSD at an all time high.
No. 2178812
>>2178791I feel like there is no other option left for me. The doctors just keep giving me wrong meds, nothing works, therapists just care about money, I have nothing, my own brain wants me dead.
It eats me so much it starts to feel like just a fact. Everything is fucked and I should end this misery.
No. 2178866
File: 1727246956966.jpg (135.17 KB, 933x946, 1680059034473463.jpg)
Public opinion is malleable like warm plasticine. From a position of power people can easily be made to support something to their own detriment. One doesn't even need to convince the majority, only create an impression that the majority is already convinced and everyone will have to fall in line to avoid getting attacked by the ordinary citizen.
No. 2178875
>>2172713Unironically, are you next level ugly? Or is he next level attractive?
If the answer to both those questions is no, then you need to dump him. You can do better.
No. 2178905
File: 1727251289864.webp (30.47 KB, 1085x764, 1000016935.jpg)
No matter what I do. I return to this cursed ass apartment that I fucking hate. I can't believe that I'm 30 and stuck in this loop. My dad is batshit fucking insane. I have promised myself endless of times that I would never come back here. No matter what I do. I return here. To this apartment that I hate. To this town that I hate. I fall out of society entirely.
I'm struggling immensely with both my mental and physical health. I'm pretty dysfunctional because I cannot focus on anything. There's not much that I can do. I have been on endless medication. I did go to therapy. I can't afford it. Plus I'm continuously depressed because I have no social authority. I don't have a boyfriend, family, friends. My mental symptoms are so powerful that I am never going to be able to have a career. Wealthy people with friends, families, significant others do not get sent to therapy like I am. The therapist doesn't give a shit about me. He's going to go back to his wife and offer her all of his love. While I am continuously depressed because I'm deprived of love, intimacy, human connection. Everything that I've always wanted is to be married. It's never going to get to happen.
I've faced so much social rejection. An ugly and obese incel would probably reject me. I have nobody and I'm constantly talked down on by people that are less emotionally and intellectually complex than me.
Having a boyfriend/ husband would fix me. I'd like to experience for once what it is like to be loved, to be the first option, to have someone genuinely involved into your life. To spend quality time with your partner. To have them genuinely care about your needs. I'd like to get to live my life for once. I'd like to not be made to feel like a dog for once.
All of my interactions with people have felt like interactions with narcissists. Where I am talked down on, invalidated, pushed aside, bread crumbed.
Nobody's ever been fully involved with me.
At this point I have given up on my life. On my looks and hygiene. Not only is my life horrible. I have become society's public urinal. I do not wish that anyone would have to face the harassment that I have been placed through. As always, everyone is acting like it isn't happening to me. Like I don't have feelings and this stuff isn't harming me.
I'm gonna be gaslit to my grave.
No. 2179017
>>2176110>>2176197>>2176204>>2176205Original anon here. I should clarify that I didn't even spend money on it, and very few pieces of the collection in question had to be bought. I just used "holy grail item" to convey that it was something I'd been wanting for ages (a little under 2 decades now).
Regardless, everyone saying it's not right to expect a congratulations for it has made me feel better about not getting any lol. My bad
No. 2179044
File: 1727267414955.jpg (36 KB, 567x709, u.jpg)
i'm sorry for posting about such a shit game like overwatch but i genuinely hate the player base so fucking much. they're the most fragile little faggots on the face of the earth. blizzard absolutely coddles them and it's gotten worse ever since overwatch 2 was released. i had a tank that held the game hostage because we lost ONE team fight and claimed he wasn't getting healed. he outright refused to play and was just afk. stupid moid kept saying shit like "this is what happens when you don't group up or heal". god we need another fucking draft because there's too many useless scrotes with too much free time on their hands.
i've had multiple accounts across so many years of playing since the game came out. i've had a lot of them perma banned because i shit talked a lot and said things like tranny and retard. i'm down to 2 accounts. i don't type any slurs anymore and i hardly even curse. even just telling someone that they're throwing or playing like shit or saying "tank diff" is enough to get suspended now. recently i got suspended for a month for lightly shit talking. right after the suspension ended, i played for a week, shit talked again (less shit talk than before) but then i got suspended again. i absolutely despise the toxic positivity this game expects you to have. it will put you with throwers, hackers, and straight up retards (not to mention their match making is shit which causes more frustration) and expects you to not say a word. fuck you blizzard, you ruined overwatch with your greedy monetization. i pray for the day your trash can of a company goes under, you bunch of tranny pandering greedy hacks.
No. 2179089
File: 1727272028490.gif (728.89 KB, 220x200, me-too-bitch-me-too.gif)
>>2179081not since my teens, more like on and off every year since my teens but same.
No. 2179166
Had a fight with the moid, he just went off for ages and I started recording it for the first time bc I didnt drink that much that night for the first time (yeah I'm stupid he always picks fights when he can gaslight me bc "well you had weed.", "well you had something to drink.", "well, you have adhd and didn't take your meds.")
And I do remember the night, what the issue was (it started bc I moved his plate in front of me so i wouldn't forget it since i meant to get up, he took it as i was indirectly accusing him of not taking care of it.. like i don't care, just don't want my dogs to get at the chicken bones. Generally thought I'd just take care of it while I'm up. No pissy feelings, just the next to get up probably and didn't want to forget. Meant for me, not him. I don't mind and don't ever give him shit.)
So now I'd insulted his dignity and whatever the fuck. Managed to calm all that down (cant recall how often i simply apologised), but genuinely wanted to know if he had a bigger issue with me rn, since clearly i make him uncomfortable or piss him off now with absolute no reason.. so like maybe he dislikes me currently and everything i do is shit and an attack. And it was stupid, bc he didn't understand what i meant and kept going on.
Now I have 20 min of audio saved and can't dare listen to it. Bc I know it was me apologising and him ranting at me while i asked him to stop.
I can't face that yet. I'm so spineless. I'm so scared and old and fucking lost.
Can't even listen to the audio bc I'm so scared. Then again, in that moment i truly felt like just killing myself to make it end to make it stop, to get him to please stop berating me for nothing.
I think he broke me in a way..
And there i sit in front of that audio and can't bring to play it.
No. 2179173
File: 1727278352264.webp (37.81 KB, 1084x940, 1000016958.jpg)
I'm SUBHUMAN and a black dog.
When I return to this apartment and live with my hoarder batshit insane dad. I give up on everything. On my looks. On my hygiene.
My house is filthy. I have dreads in my hair. Everything is all over the place. I'm in agonizing mental and physical pain. I smell terrible. I don't brush my teeth.
I used to be above average in looks. Then I gave up because there was something wrong with me that made me incapable of adapting socially or gaining any form of social authority. I couldn't get into a stable relationship. In all of these years. Nobody has ever been involved in my life. I've never been in love.
I'm just witnessing everyone move on. While I've fallen off the face of the planet. Well, I wasn't part of society in the first place.
I don't wish this upon anybody. Everyday I wonder why the fuck did it have to be me.
No. 2179188
>>2179166he is an
abusive child and you should leave with all your things or change the locks and put his things in a storage unit the next time he goes to work. there is no coming back from this level of emotional and verbal abuse. you
can’t breathe around this man without risking a twenty minute freak out. you should literally never give him a second thought because i do not care about how annoying you have ever been, there is no fucking way anyone could be annoying enough to make a chimp out like that understandable. i look at people like that now like they are fucking crazy when they act like that. you did not owe that man an apology and i know you know that but i’m going to say that too. if you killed this man and i was on the jury i would acquit you as a
victim of psychological terrorism.
No. 2179207
>>2179188I'm definitely not one to roll over, but I'm not an asshole either.
You gave me the strength to listen to it and I feel so much more stupid now I did. I don't think I can keep this going, i feel sick listening to how he berated me for absolutely nothing. I like his kid, I'm terrified of having to slaughter my roosters alone, of all that.. but fuck it. I've not once felt I was capable of doing that myself. It's time i learn..
Fuck, fuck, fuck that was hard to listen to.
No. 2179221
>>2179207Listened and am apparently a "man hater", brought up the "I'm sorry i didn't mean it like that" up to 43 from my side… and I got berated for 20 min, constantly interrupted and incabable of having time to form my own thoughts. Guess there was a reason I didn't want to listen to it.. Fuck me I'm so stupid. I need a therapist again, lol. I want out of this dynamic. I know I'm too much with the whole "wanting to communicate", but I don't insult, hurt or am angry with my partners.
I feel so damn stupid.
No. 2179308
>>2178581I thankfully have nice friends who are standing by my side currently. My parents are both are extremely old and sick at the same time, and being the elder daughter, I'm stuck taking care of them both while also taking care of the house and my siblings. I got a housemain to help me with things since I'm busy with university and this being my last semester, and I'm swamped. They got angry at me for doing this and yelled at me, which is why I got upset and felt the need to vent yesterday. My financial situation isn't the best right now, and I go to university by the bus which comes too early sometimes and I don't get to have breakfast at home and have to stay hungry since I can't afford food from the cafeteria. My friends knew about this and they buy me food and bring me food with them from home to help me, and they try their best to help me with our group work. I feel horrible for putting them in this situation, but I guess that's what friends are for.
My parents have always been shitty to me and only saw me as some free child slave, so that's why they're upset we have to pay someone to do the work I refuse to waste my time and university work for. They refuse to eat anything she makes and keep throwing up like some anachans, and I have to be the one who makes the food so they eat, but it still wastes so much of my time, and they also get pissy when I order takeout instead.
They've also always been
abusive and controlling of the very finest details of my life, and they won't let me move out and have some legal power over me despite me being an adult, so I could get arrested for daring to own my own place and moving there, and I could lose a job if they want me to. They probably want me to get married and have kids so they can have their first set of grandchildren, which would fuck my life even further knowing the retarded trad culture here and how marriage is living hell. Being a mother and married is what got my mom where she is right now, she got breast cancer from birth control abuse, because she didn't want any more kids but my dad was insisting on more, so you can imagine what kind of "relationship" or lack thereof they have. All my dad sees in my mom is a housemaid who feeds him and changes his clothes and cleans after him, to the point of dismissing her sleep schedule and forcing her to sleep only 4 hours a day, which ruined her health further. Now he's doing the same shit to me and she also expects me to do her role, but I hate both of them and don't want to take care of them. I wish they'd just die. But even if they do, I'll be stuck with my siblings and the drama around the inheritance. I'll never be free.
No. 2179317
File: 1727287994342.jpeg (183.07 KB, 734x386, IMG_0008.jpeg)
I’m on my period rn and I feel like I’ve lost like, a fucken quart of blood today
No. 2179333
I wish my retarded ass brother and his stupid bitch wife actually gave a shit about their daughter, because now it's my job to raise her, even if I don't want kids. She's not a brat or anything, she's actually a very sweet little girl, but i feel awful for her knowing that her parents drop her off with me 6 days a week, and only pay attention to her baby brother. Her dad is an onion type parent, he doesnt speak to her at all because she couldn't engage in "meaningful conversation" no shit you fuckin retard, shes four. She doesnt give a shit about your job, she just wants to talk about dolls. And at this point, i can't just stop taking care of her because she literally has nobody except for me. I don't want her to go into foster care either, where she may be worse off, so I'm stuck raising someone else's kid instead of enjoying my 20s
No. 2179353
File: 1727290512746.jpg (79.02 KB, 736x848, 1000065813.jpg)
The more I think about today, the more annoyed I feel, so I have to be a mediocre teacher because the students, which are at least 18 years old, are also mediocre wastes of space? Why? It's idiotic, I just hate when people defend mediocrity and indifference, trying to play it out as just being young.
I am young, do you think I want to stand there and drone about a bunch of information I already know of to a bunch of ingrate faggots? I don't, I want to be at home, playing games and getting paid for existing, but here we fucking are.
I was talking to a friend and like, this group has been worse than the group of pre-school students with two low functioning autists that I had to teach English to, at least some of them had interest in learning. These fucking idiots are just there to warm up the seats, I honestly hope they can't pass the required tests to fly because that would get them and a bunch of people killed.
>but English isn't an important thing to learn~~~~~~
It wouldn't be if the fucking manuals weren't in fucking English, and the manuals are the shit they have to read in order to fucking fly.
And then my family goes
>just don't pay attention to them!!
And I don't, but I'm talking about this whole thing because it's insane, I'm fucking insane I guess, because I guess I shouldn't be worried that future pilots can't fucking read the manuals of the fucking planes and can't pay attention at something for more than 15 minutes.
Like, I used to be a student too, I still am a student, I was at French classes a few months ago re-reading shit I already know of and I was respectful enough to participate in class and not go
>uwu I'm embawassed
Omg fucking kill yourself, seriously, how the fuck can you talk about fucking, raging alcoholism and your family and shit humor but be fucking embarrassed to read some retarded text written in retard?? How?? HOW?
And just because I will be 29 years old soon and have a fucking career doesn't mean I don't understand, that I don't also know that the classes are long, but the material is shit they already fucking know, it's just in another fucking language Jesus, it can't be that fucking hard to read shit with pictures like in pre-school and not see that wing and fucking ala you stupid fuckface, like the shit you stuff your face with but metallic and attached to a body made of metal that flies swooosh all over the allowed airspaces depending on your license and fuel you stupid idiot asshat animal beast retarded faggot god I want to kill myself.
No. 2179421
>>2178439i’m samefagging
>haven’t had period in months>start birth control (minipill)>start bleeding OBSCENELY within the first 2 days of starting>heavier than i’ve ever bled in my life>kinda scared, saw that it can either be normal or “oh god oh fuck to go the ER”>it’s only been going on 4 days but no sign of stoppingwhat do i do
No. 2179422
File: 1727294769771.jpg (260.7 KB, 667x467, 1000016966.jpg)
Is being called a black dog considered bullying?
No. 2179482
>>2179339The court
is the legal uphold unfortunately.
>>2179400 is right.
>>2179400I'm not allowed to study abroad either so there's really no escape. Hell, I'm not even allowed to exist the house alone, let alone travel.
I've been considering suicide since ever, and I guess the time for it has come. I found my dad's shotgun, might practice using it for future use. No. 2179535
>>2179353I love you, anon. I'm obsessed with aviation. Flunk as many as you can if they don't know English. A lot of crashes and runway incursions have been caused by misunderstandings. They really need to know English to fly.
Are all of them men?
No. 2179546
File: 1727302280621.jpg (90.86 KB, 1017x786, pretty_kitty_room_guardians_by…)
Does anyone else struggle badly with identity? Idk if it's mental illness (or autism) or I meme'd myself into dissociating so much now I don't know who I am. Let's say that yadda yadda past traumas and yadda yadda I changed many houses (I moved out, social security took me once, once I ran away all of that because I was living with a rapist and people brought me back because but he's your dad nonny!! You can't live without him!!)
Bad stuff to the side, to survive I divided myself into three distinct personalities, the social one, the efficient one and the safe one and now that I'm safe externally, went to therapy and learned to control them and started to live, I have no idea how to go on.
Let me be clear about one thing: I don't believe in DID at all nor I'm saying that this is a special mental illness, just asking if any other nonas went through this. Trauma took away most of my late child hood and then years so I find myself engaging with jeuvenile hobbies and then something in my head goes "Yeah no that's stupid" or when I'm out doing errands as a grown up, filling up job applications, doing interviews, signing rent contracts I go "man I want to go to the toy store and get a little toy." but not in the adult way, in the child way.
And these states are so strong, they make me question who the "real " me is because they don't feel like hues of me but actual different people to the point I scold myself for thinking differently.
I don't have BPD, I don't have any personality disorders, the closest my therapist went was intense daydreaming but this is ruining my life, I wish I felt whole.
No. 2179566
>>2179546"Juvinilie hobbies"
Consider this anon, "play" is a child's simulation of adulthood. The parents only job is to simulate adulthood in a safe manner so the child is prepared, if this duty isn't upheld then the child will be rendered abnormal, socially and even in their physical development and brain chemistry. There's nothing wrong with playing as an adult, as long as it isn't at the expense of doing your adult duties - such as socialising with loved ones and cleaning yourself. Beyond that, have fun
No. 2179632
File: 1727308215944.jpg (121.2 KB, 1280x720, raaaah.jpg)
>start a credit card to build credit
>credit score is already in very good range
>drops 20 points in the span of two months in spite of me completely paying the whole credit balance off monthly
>turns out it's probably because the other account it's linked to usually has a bit less money in it than the credit card balance because the money I make goes into paypal first and needs to be manually transferred
thinking I shouldn't have bothered because who knows how long it'd take to increase the score 20 points even if/when I make sure the balance is better.
this is so dumb but I guess I asked for it for not knowing how it worked…
No. 2179638
File: 1727308669270.jpg (68.62 KB, 1200x675, Dmc_uu5WwAE_GvL.jpg)
Fuck my professor for assigning something today at 2 pm that's due tomorrow afternoon. Fucking retard. She doesn't answer anyone's emails either and made me cry on the second week of class. That's why she has a shitty number on ratemyprofessor.
No. 2179647
File: 1727309167232.jpeg (31.46 KB, 435x342, IMG_2986.jpeg)
Today I sent an extremely revealing, bold and cringe e-mail and I can’t take my mind off of it. I don’t know what possessed me whilst writing it but I was certain that it was a good e-mail ; I reread it an hour after sending it and was horrified. I don’t know if I will be able to open any replies to it for at least a few days.
I needed to send something like it, to stand up for myself, but it’s just so long and over-laboured. I’m so risk-averse that I can’t even send a slightly confrontational e-mail without almost immediately regretting it. I’m really glad I sent it but Christ I’m reeling.
I want the strength to bee myself all of the time… because I always end up betraying or doubting my convictions
No. 2179653
I don't understand what it is about me that makes people take such polarizing reactions. I don't even talk to people. My entire family is already dead, what more do they want from me? Why do they want me to suffer more? It's literally just random girls from the internet who like spreading shit like I'm abusive and then point to vent instagram posts I've made as evidence. I don't even know these people and those who I did know, I cut them off because they were killing my vibe. Why can't they just leave me alone, why do they insist on making my life harder? They even say I fool people by appearing like someone who "lost it all and yet persevered" but that's literally what happened to me. I try not to react publicly because that fuels the fire, but why do I have to be subject to this? I'm always in my own corner, minding my own business, it's these people who try to start shit with me and then lose their fucking minds when I refuse to engage, which I refuse to do because the second I do, they twist my words to say I'm guilt tripping them or manipulating them, but if I just let them do whatever they want, suddenly I'm uncaring and remorseless. Like, can I just live in peace? It's a lose/lose situation. I just hope they'll fuck off if I give them zero reaction whatsoever and these BPD ridden hoes find some new supply because I've been through too fucking much to continue giving them my emotional energy. I want to succeed in life, I fucking refuse to let my life be shit forever, these suburban cradled bitches have no idea what it was like out there losing family member after family member to poverty and they need to pick on another surburbia born bitch with a wide wardrobe and vaguely emotionally abusive parents and constant access to boba shops and dunkin. I will fucking crawl out of the hole I was forced into at birth and it will all be on my own power unlike these worthless nepo bitches who have a full ride through college.
No. 2179666
File: 1727310238760.gif (404.29 KB, 220x170, IMG_2607.gif)
gifrel is all i gotta say
No. 2179667
File: 1727310267949.png (937.22 KB, 715x713, asdg.png)
I hate when I tell my parents something extremely upsetting and stressful and they hit me with "it could always be worse." Yes, it could be technically worse guys. Thank you for the love and support like always. I love you guys, too.
(I have to be mad at my parents or I will burst into tears over how they don't love me.)
No. 2179722
File: 1727313193635.jpg (46.6 KB, 735x413, 1000016971.jpg)
All of my interactions with people have been strained most of my life. I felt like I had to beg people just to stay. My whole life I've been pushed aside, devalued, inferiorized. Basically, made to feel like I don't have feelings, needs or desires.
My BFF started dating my ex immediately. She was the only person that I've ever felt comfortable around. She immediately ditched me for my ex.
I genuinely want to get into a stable relationship for once. I'd like to finally be a priority in someone's life. To mean the world to them. To finally feel protected and important. My whole life I've had to chase people like a dog. I'm everyone's fucking fan
Been going through the same shit for 16 years. I give up(you have to be 18 to post here)
No. 2179756
>>2179755Kek I knew a girl who had a phobia of clowns and would get
triggered when people sent her the clown emoji in text
No. 2179819
>>2179308>>2179482Please hang in there, friend. We believe in you. This situation is extremely difficult and unfair, but it's not hopeless.
>>2179623Adding on to this, there can be major differences in how easy it is to move from one country to another. Certain countries have agreements with each other that make it much easier for their citizens and residents to pass through each other's borders. There are immigration lawyers who exist specifically to help clients use these arrangements to slowly work their way towards their goal destination. For example, some people go from Iran to Turkey, then to Albania, then to Germany. Once you have any amount of money to spare, try and get into contact with one of them. There may also be some charity organizations that are founded to help women in your situation.
You also mentioned that you're going to school. Once you've graduated and gotten a couple years of experience, you could try the EU Blue Card Program. The whole point of this program is to recruit intelligent foreign workers who already have experience in their fields, upgrade their degrees and credentials to EU country standards, and then integrate them into the workforce as smoothly as possible. Each country has different standards for how much experience you need to have in your field before they'll take you, so read each country's requirements. Some people find this process easier than taking the route of a normal student visa or work visa.
A couple other random methods I've seen people use to move to better places include:
- international Au Pair agencies: I know a couple of girls who did this. One was from Indonesia and the other was from India, and they both used the same agency to move to Canada. I met them while I was on a trip there. After spending some time in the country working as Au Pairs, they managed to get student visas so that they could earn degrees and establish themselves in the country. Speak to an immigration lawyer before going to school in your host country if you are on a work visa.
- If you don't mind doing agricultural work, you can sign up to WOOOF and volunteer for locations in nicer countries. If you can find one that is open to hiring you after you volunteer with them, you can use this to get a work Visa. I met one woman my age from Turkey who managed to do this. Once again, speak to an immigration lawyer before taking jobs or enrolling in school.
I'm not going to pretend that it's easy to do all of this, or fair that you've been put in this situation, but it's worth a try to see if you can escape you country before you make the final decision to off yourself.
No. 2179831
>>2179333I'm this anon and they left her at my house overnight AGAIN!!!! It's not that i don't like the kid, she's a sweet girl, but I can't fucking take care of her like her parents should be. I live in a studio apartment, shes bored out of her mind and all i can offer her is tv or an iPad since there isnt a single thing in my house that she can use even as a makeshift toy. They didn't even bother bringing an extra pair of clothes either, probably cause they knew I'd say no if I knew they were gonna make her spend the night, so shes sleeping in day old underwear and one of my t shirts. I feel like shit for being annoyed at this situation, cause this isn't her fault at all, but I'm so fucking frustrated. Her brother gets to stay with his mom's grandparents because he's related to them, but those pieces of shit won't let her stay because "she isn't related to us," god fucking damn it i hate that bitch and her family. Im spread so god damn thin right now, and there's no way I can leave her alone or ask othsr family to help since they all live far away. I'm 23 years old, I should not be raising a child that isn't mine because her parents are fucking retarded.
No. 2179930
I used to find males attractive (I am bisexual, and will always be, this is not an "I dated men but I'm a true lesbian" cope) but these days I can't stomach them. I see a guy online and I get upset, I start thinking "I bet he's a misogynistic piece of shit. He will bald and lust after little girls in a few years, too." I cannot find them cute, funny, or even tolerable. I can't listen to any man speak without rolling my eyes. I think of having sex with my boyfriend and I gag, I talk to him and I can't hide my contempt, I can't go on any longer. The thing is, we are in a LDR (driveable distance, not e-dating) and I haven't mustered the strenght to go to his place and end it. He hasn't done anything, I just hate all men. I even get upset by seeing heterosexual couples in the wild (I bet he's cheating) or seeing teen scrotelings walking around (I bet they share deepfakes of their classmates). Any man I see, I assume the worst in my head and judge him. Is this insane or based? I can't tell.
No. 2179991
>>2179988I used to have really bad teeth aswell and at some point i had a lot of pain and a thick cheek. I had to go to a clinic (like from the hospital) to get it checked and unlike in your case they were very professional and careful. I had to get a lot of teeth removed in an operation and now i feel fine. I hope you can build up the curage
nonny! The doc who shamed you definitely is unprofessional!
No. 2180000
File: 1727342262955.jpeg (36.4 KB, 750x736, IMG_9441.jpeg)
Been doing Pilates to try to get rid of cellulite and all it’s doing is making my ass bigger.
No. 2180052
>>2180049That’s bullshit. From my experience, at least.
I’m a millennial (in my 30s) and lots of girls were saying shit like that when I was in middle school. I grew up in a middle class town, so there were no excuse for them to be so sexual at that young age.
I remember being 14 and my friends talking about sucking dicks and wanting to fuck teachers.
No. 2180056
>>2180038Nope, we're in latam, but at this point they may as well be Chinese because it's like they don't understand plain Spanish either.
>>2179535I really will make them have a really shit grade so they have to learn English again, or at least warm up the seats again.
Surprisingly, 2 of the most retarded students are a woman and a moid, the others (a few moids and another woman) just follow their lead like they're in elementary school and like life is a Disney movie about school.
The mob mentality is so bizarre, I wonder what makes full-fledged adults act this way? Well, I think I know, it's their burned out brains because they spend their days consooming shit on their phones, they have shit daily routines, a shit diet and seems like no morals or sense of responsibility or even sense of duty it seems.
Like, you would expect future pilots to be more serious, specially because this isn't cheap at all and requires people to risk their lives in so many ways.
I just don't get it.
No. 2180068
File: 1727348924507.jpg (271.84 KB, 2048x1365, 1000016906.jpg)
I want to vent about the same shit infinitely. In my broken ass English. Simultaneously, I don't wanna clog the vent thread.
I just want to be loved.
No. 2180092
File: 1727351153606.webp (23.66 KB, 512x400, 646143293.jpg.jpeg)
Off to a full day of classes on only 4 hours of sleep as a weakling who needs at least 9 per night
No. 2180142
>>2179623Unfortunately, I legally need their permission to make a passport, I'm not considered independent from them unless I get married, which is the last thing I want. Running away at midnight isn't viable either because I don't have a car and I don't know the way around the city to go to the airport, and in all cases they have all my legal papers, even my birth certificate, which if I needed in the country I'm fleeing to hypothetically, will miss my chances out even more. It's such an embarrassing situation at this point.
>>2179819I appreciate your kindness and concern. But "people" from my country got us banned from immigrating to all the good countries because of their retardation there. They're by far the worst immigrants in history. And I don't think we have local immigration lawyers, unless I should contact one from a potential target country? I'm not that picky as long as I can have a place to live in, healthy food to eat, and a job that pays me, and maybe some nice nature and weather, and ok sane people. But I feel like it's too late for me, despite only being 22, I'm getting as sick as my parents because of their negligence and abuse and how they denied me healthcare for too long that my condition got too bad, so even if I successfully immigrate, I'll have lots of baggage to carry with me and I might end up not making it the way I envisioned. But at least I'll die somewhere nice I guess. I'll look into the programes you suggested though, thank you again.
No. 2180153
File: 1727355369364.jpg (31.28 KB, 720x720, 1000016981.jpg)
Something humiliates me. I can't stand living my life for one more second or minute. I want to tear off my skin.
No. 2180233
File: 1727362181760.png (514.2 KB, 700x391, tumblr_ptzcwrVGBL1xmw5ego2_128…)
Nonnies what's it mean when a scrote started off flirting with me a little and making comments about how I'm pretty and easy to love but now he says he thinks of me as a daughter? I'm all fucked up kek, does he like me romantically? Sexually? Does he think I'm ugly now so he doesn't like me like that anymore? Does this mean he likes me more now or less?
No. 2180236
>>2180142I'm the 2nd ayrt. Your situation is one of the most difficult I've seen on this board. Hang in there, friend.
Yes, when I bring up immigration lawyers, I mean one from a potential target country. I kind of added that in as a disclaimer because I don't know your exact situation, and the advice that has worked for other people might not be 100% accurate to you. Speaking to a professional can give you much more specific, useful advice. There are some who do online meetings, so you might be able to save up and schedule something like that in the future.
There are a decent amount of people who can independently find the information they need and figure everything out by themselves, but I don't feel responsible telling you to try that.
If you haven't already, I would recommend searching for as many stories as possible posted by emigrants from your country. See if anyone else has posted their method for escaping.
Right now, it looks like your biggest obstacle is the passport. Your two main options are to do what
>>2180163 says and try to forge their permission, or try to find some reason for them to agree to make a passport.
If they are muslim, you could use this as a reason for them to leave the country. Assuming you're not from Saudi Arabia, you'll likely need a passport to cross the border and visit Mecca. Since they're old and sick, you can try to convince them to visit it one last time before they die, to make sure that they are right with god or whatever. Convince them that you also HAVE to go with them, not only because you are their caretaker, but because you also want to visit the holy places and show Allah that you are his true follower. If you are usually not very religious, try to frame it like, "I know I'm not the most devout person, but I still believe that it is important to be in the good graces of Allah. Before my parents die, I want to make sure they are in good standing with him."
…and yeah, there is a portion of retards in every population and it drives me insane how they ruin life for normal people. I wish we had some kind some kind of agency that could specifically locate sane women who are trapped in shitty countries and send a helicopter to extract them.
No. 2180406
>>2180386I'm hoping that the pedo who groomed me fucking dies as well, hangs himself off a bridge when he's inevitably exposed as a nonce either by me or one of his MANY, MANY OTHER
VICTIMS. Or. Lives his life as a exposed pedo, ruined. Either one works for me. Lol. You just gave me a new idea,
nonnie! I'll be sure to wish this on my birthday.
No. 2180440
>>2180404Thanks you~
>>2180406May all our wishes come true
No. 2180695
File: 1727377433535.png (279.74 KB, 633x531, LLweXa6.png)
>>2180690>STD fandom (aka moids)lmao'd
No. 2180735
>>2180727Nta but I feel sorry for you and every other woman who didn't grow up naturally hating males and finding women to be the superior sex. I wish you a happy healing
nonnie and hope you will see the moidhating light in its full glory.
No. 2180749
File: 1727379279714.jpg (129.3 KB, 1080x1078, 1000017003.jpg)
When you are weak. People want to hurt you and get rid of you. Which is strange. I think another natural response is to protect, nurture and love.
Maybe it's just me. Out of everyone. It is just me being treated in this way.
No. 2180778
>>2180769It can
trigger psychosis tho. If you are predisposed.
No. 2180797
>>2180749For most of human existence, humans would live in a tribe of 10-25 people their whole life. Interactions outside that group were limited and often violent to the point of senseless deadly attacks and back-and-forth revenge cycles. Humans also killed roughly 1/3 of their own newborns.
So, we do naturally have a great deal of instincts towards empathy, high-investment child rearing, social group formation, and in-group aid. But we also display high rates of ignoring, discarding, and attacking those who don’t fall into our desired in-group and its perceived wellbeing.
Contemporary society involves meeting and interacting with such a mass amount of people that it also affects how those stats look and how it feels to navigate those categories. Family can be put out of sight and out of mind, friends can easily be discarded for a new batch of friends. Peer groups change constantly throughout life and can be beneficial or a mere nuisance. There’s limits to how much people desire to aid those they view as a perpetual problem, especially if it’s perceived as a character flaw instead of a physical illness.
No. 2180800
>>2180769NTA but psychedelics aren’t all “love and light” unless you’re only into the new age / new thought circles where they only talk about that stuff, plus lots of people get addicted to them and later end up regretting the experience because they develop stuff like psychosis like the other nona said
>>2180778Yeah I’ve read a lot of people who do them end up being mentally broken afterwards. Usually because they have some sort of Gnostic / Simulation Theory type of vision, in some rare events they start believing they’re literally possessed by demons from hell and develop schizophrenia and stuff similar to that
No. 2180833
>>2180778idk man they healed my psychosis that I got from prescription meds so that sounds like a load of bullshit and very questionable.
>>2180800>plus lots of people get addicted to themyou can't get addicted to psychedelics, if you keep taking them they stop having any effect because you build tolerance very fast and they have no after effects when they stop working that would make someone want to take more like stimulants or benzos. Anyway, regular antidepressants actually have more potential harmful effects, and they have no actual healing benefits - they don't cause the brain to repair itself like mushrooms do. They just clog the serotonin receptor with an artificial molecule which does nothing, like a tampon, and slows down the usage of the serotonin produced by the brain. So you have more serotonin left over but you have your receptors clogged by this thing that does nothing, so your life quality decreases gradually and you just become indifferent to everything and numb.
Additionally, microdosing means you are taking a dose that is below the threshold that causes any noticeable effects so it's like you didn't take anything, you just feel better and managing life and emotions is easier. You don't trip out on a microdose, hear voices or get "bad" trips or any actual psychedelic effect that would cause you to go into some massively self reflective state that would impair normal functioning lol
No. 2180852
File: 1727382043202.jpg (196.45 KB, 800x450, plankton.jpg)
Its pissing rain so I decided what a perfect day to grab a nice hot chili or soup! Made it to the drive thru and the guy on the speaker tells me they don't have either. What the fuck!!!!!! It's prime lunch time what do you MEAN you don't have any?! I don't like any of their other food so I just didn't get anything. Waste of my half hour lunch break and gas. Now I'm cold, hungry and annoyed
No. 2180888
File: 1727383369162.jpg (47.08 KB, 1273x607, wtf-triggerwarning-before-horr…)
I just got a trigger warning before a horror movie, and I need to understand why the FUCK that's a thing. I've never seen this before.
No. 2180931
File: 1727384333260.jpg (30.6 KB, 680x392, uh.jpg)
>>2180923
No. 2180950
>>2180921>so it's addictive in the same way as anything, so let's say video games or fast foodSure but you don’t see someone literally screaming and crying in a breakdown about how reality is an illusion and the aliens are coming for us when they play too many video games unless they’re so mentally fucked that they literally can’t separate fantasy and real life, saying deranged stuff like that, however,
is pretty common after doing psychedelics
>>2180923Ok except we’re getting overpopulated anyways so maybe less of us existing wouldn’t be so bad lol. Also the suicide point is dumb, lots of people have shitty lives but fear death so much and don’t wanna cause such pain to their loved ones that they can’t bring themselves to end it no matter how bad they want to
No. 2180955
>>2180861Every person I know who began doing shrooms turned into an obnoxious idiot who couldn't shut the fuck up about how much they love doing shrooms and how they wanna do them again and how great shrooms are and it was so funny/amazing/interesting when
insert retarded story that happened while they were high and shrooms are so life changing and they really want to do them again soon and shrooms are so great and they love shrooms. I had to cut off some friends while they were going through their shroom lover arcs. It's genuinely impossible to be around them when you aren't into drugs because psychedelics become their sole personality trait
No. 2180958
File: 1727384962042.gif (116.45 KB, 150x120, 1715982887246.gif)
>>2180923
No. 2180967
File: 1727385158978.png (292.96 KB, 486x273, 5378517556.PNG)
>>2180959
No. 2180998
File: 1727385914188.png (422.95 KB, 800x800, download.png)
Integrate! Newfags, get your Integrate! Only costs a few years of lurking!
No. 2181001
>>2180981Never said I didn't care, retard KEK you're the one who assumed any woman who thinks it's preferable for the human race to end than for misogyny to continue eternally "doesn't care about her own life". You're the one with the retarded autistic hypotheticals here, scrote, not us
>>2180982The whole "argument" is just so nonsensical, so what if I wouldn't be alive without moids? I just wouldn't be alive and the world would keep spinning and women who were already born would still be alive. What's your point kek
(scrotefoiling) No. 2181008
>>2180991Probably because the /pol/fag accusations currently being posted in this thread make no sense.
>>2180942>people should respect each other>>2180954>reee /pol/fagIt's just another instance of a terminally online retard and probably a newfag that doesn't realize what they're actually saying.
No. 2181045
File: 1727386811125.png (478.09 KB, 817x757, 1000018090.png)
>>2181031Wait, so this newfag went and did that whole "we need to be grateful for men" bullshit because of an anon venting about wanting scrotes dead because of horrible cases? Yeah, let's pile on reports. Fuck it.
No. 2181105
File: 1727387734733.jpg (68.27 KB, 1016x775, 1000009242.jpg)
>>2181050
You're either a scrote or a really autistic pick me. Just in case you're the latter, let me explain something to you: some people like to use hyperbole when they're venting about something, especially if it's about something terrible like rape. Do you get it now, retard? Can you fuck off somewhere else instead of asking irrelevant and pedantic what if questions to people who are just ranting?
And if you are a scrote, just fuck off completely. The rest of the internet is your echo chamber but of course you need to be here trying to fact check women because you need to feed your fragile little ego. Kys.(scrotefoiling)
No. 2181120
File: 1727387945731.jpg (71.05 KB, 1188x1033, GVMkAqaWUAAwp3y.jpg)
>>2181103
No. 2181137
File: 1727388155389.jpg (30.37 KB, 244x275, b256fg45cfhd47GS6h.jpg)
No. 2181148
>>2181119>mentally ill anti-nigelfagNo where in this derail has anyone mentioned being in a relationship. Single women are just as capable of posting inane arguments as women in relationships.
>>2181139It's starting to smell like trannycord in here.
No. 2181152
File: 1727388341295.jpg (27.53 KB, 275x241, gv57ujgf345ujst.jpg)
No. 2181157
>>2180079what kind of workplace calls the cops when a newbie doesn't show up on time lmao
that is crazy
anyway don't feel bad, and don't let anyone make you feel bad. you overslept, big whoop
No. 2181159
File: 1727388437225.jpg (16.9 KB, 275x236, boohoo.jpg)
No. 2181163
>>2181148I refuse to believe a woman would cape this hard for men if she wasn't straight and either in a relationship or trying to be in one.
>"mentally ill"So your feeling got hurt huh.
No. 2181168
File: 1727388509439.jpeg (Spoiler Image,20.14 KB, 439x480, 1654548701091.jpeg)
>man hate on lolcow
>"you must be mad because a man hurt your feelings!"
Oh this faggot is starting to sound like something very familiar. Report, everyone.
No. 2181171
File: 1727388549818.jpg (19.43 KB, 275x204, srts.jpg)
No. 2181184
File: 1727388740545.jpg (12.82 KB, 275x197, 768ufu65e465.jpg)
No. 2181245
>>2181237You can kinda read the comic like they’re talking to each other
Non virgin is just tsundere while virgin is a secret slut who wants the dick.
No. 2181262
>>2180696>>there's absolutely nothing to do in the game. you log in, tap a couple of things, spend money, and that's it.You're absolutely right. It's so boring to the point I even forget to log in or that I even downloaded it on my phone. I've done two purchases so far, and only when the items had huge discounts.
Sure, the Chibi Sakuras are cute but I don't want to rewatch the whole CCS plot now in visual novel format just to get tickets, coins and other shit.
No. 2181296
File: 1727391129907.webp (83.91 KB, 1084x1355, 1000016766.jpg)
I'm in so much pain. I don't want to be alone anymore
No. 2181393
File: 1727395319022.jpg (112.52 KB, 666x666, 1657162416243.jpg)
literally 95% of food in america has so much added sugar i fucking hate it. companies do this so we get addicted to their products. all to line their pockets faster in expense of our health. our legislatures do nothing about it because they're all being paid through lobbying. i just want a simple greek yogurt without the 12 grams of sugar for each serving. i have fucking pcos that's getting worse. i have to spend so much time reading labels and ingredients on everything i eat. i can't keep mindlessly eating sugar anymore!!it's literally killing me!!!
there needs to be regulations or restrictions on these greedy conglomerates but i know it will never happen because americans are purposely kept ignorant about what good nutrition actually is. there's not enough americans that know about the effects of sugar and how it's everywhere. our government wants us to think carbs and fat are the worst things when it's actually sugar, especially refined sugar. notice how there's never mainstream news articles about how bad sugar is. it's always "watch out for trans fat!!" there's high fructose corn syrup in the sandwich bread, shut the fuck up, gerald.
No. 2181400
File: 1727395678958.png (552.41 KB, 480x640, IMG_3243.png)
i am slipping into a bad depression again and worried. the bad thoughts take over and snowball and i thought i was bigger than this now? the main source is i feel so disconnected and alone, it starts from this tight chest sensation, i get the brain fog and stop wishing to do the things i love which im usually content with. i really need more socialization but i dont know how. i volunteer and i attend hobby classes sometimes but my other commitments are remote and pay too well/im too late into uni to switch to person. i think if i just had one friend i wouldnt feel so bad? i wonder if i should just dress up and go more places alone, maybe document it on a blog so i dont feel like im in an echo chamber with a diary? it also stunts me mentally i feel. the one person im close with, my boyfriend, i only see every few months. how do some people deal so easily? i just want to go back to having a rich inner world, feeling happy about things, feeling content alone, but i cant recall what helped me the most in those times. i also go to therapy and im on very good medication, is it just trying something new? mindset? where can i even meet someone my age who has similar interests or isnt pregnant/is also friendless and doesnt like partying? how can i continue to work on feeling okay alone? read more? im very hopeless. all i have is nature and animals but sometimes i still feel alone and worry about going to a bad place again. i think even of breaking up with my boyfriend because i dont want to be depressed when i really want to and should be happy. i cant slip back into this. im willing to fix it and do more, i am, even if it means putting myself out there. what a useless vent
No. 2181434
>>2178687dunno, i just woke up and kinda felt like it?
we've been having a hard time with stuff lately and i guess my heart just gave out/
No. 2181444
I just found out that my first female crush, who is so beautiful and perfect that i stalk on social media just got married to a balding obese guy who is older than her who she only met less than a year ago. I'm going to fucking kill myself, I can't cope. I mean the fat scrote looks like a kind man, but i am fucking sobbing, I don't know how to live with the knowledge that her (likely) virginity and ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE AND FUTURE CHILDREN are with this scrote. HE GETS TO BE THE ONE WHO SHE SHOWS EVERYTHING TO?? All out of nowhere. It's too painful. I can't even be happy for her. It's just horrible. I'm so devastated. I look at the pictures they posted together, and his nasty greasy looking self, and I know now that he has touched her intimately and she has given herself to him, I can't take it. It hurts so much. SHE LET HIM HAVE SEX WITH HER? SHE MARRIED HIM??? I don't know how to get these images out of my head. Did she want to have children and felt that this was her last chance in her late 30s? Is this why she did this? I am in disbelief. Please someone, tell me how I can deal with these feelings. I am shaking and I don't know how to cope. I need help or advice, anything. I know I am a terrible person for being a digital stalker and hating this even though she is probably happy, I feel horrible, but I am so fucked up over this, I don't know what to do.
No. 2181448
>>2181445What's your experience
nonnie, I could try helping.
No. 2181464
>>2181444while that's unfortunate for her (even if she is happy) the only way to get over this is to get a hobby, nonna. you need to occupy your mind with something really engaging. or at least go do some exercise until you're exhausted. literally go touch grass. i mean that with actual concern for you. it isn't healthy to obsess over something like this. this isn't the last beautiful woman you will see settle for a gross ugly scrote. it happens all the time, unfortunately. we can only hope he at least doesn't cheat on her and treats her right. it's common for ugly fat scrotes to get a big ego when they're with a beautiful woman because they think they can get any woman they want.
i had a huge crush on one of my friends in high school. i used to get really jealous over her boyfriend. i hated him because he was always a dick to her and she was so sweet and affectionate. i would think things like "if only i was male, i would treat her right." but i had to get over it because she was straight. that's just life.
No. 2181474
Am I overreacting? I just don't get it
>be me
>be English teacher
>pain.gif
>teach adults
>they all suck and don't have the right level of knowledge for the career
>have to teach fucking ABCs and 123s because they can't even read
>propose an exam before they begin studying at the academy
>the exam is made in order to help the students reach the desired level of knowledge
>that means at least a month or two with different classes depending on how shit is the score
>once finished that period they can begin their studies of the usual curriculum of the academy
>teachers stop wasting time teaching basic shit that students should already know
>we're talking about Mathematics, English and Physics
>students get to actually understand the topics that are being taught at the academy
>?????
>profit!
But then
>whole family gets mad at me for proposing that
>they tell me that I'm overreacting and going over the line
>I'm literally the only actual teacher of the academy that graduated from university in order to be able to teach
>they tell me that I should just throw the content at them, teach to whoever wants to listen and fuck off
I don't know, I think it's seriously disrespectful how I have to waste my time in teaching retarded shit to adults that should know what to do, it's idiotic and insane, I don't get why I have to degrade myself to the level of some failadultchildren that are being given basically certificates to kill people and themselves and that badmouth the academy where they probably barely got accepted because the others didn't want a bunch of retarded idiots.
And like, in the end, I'm the one who is being badmouthed as well because they can't speak English in 4 days of class, because they have the attention span of dead goldfish and just don't give a fuck, I'm the one who is being compared with other people that I don't even know and shitty cashgrab academies because I want the retards to think and not to just make retarded "I love my mom" level of sentences because that is not the fucking level they should be at.
It's seriously frustrating, like, it's not my fault they're shit, at least in high-school and pre-school it's kind of your fault if they can't even parrot stuff in class, but at this level it's shitty how it's somehow your fault and you can't even propose a change because then you're the one exaggerating.
No. 2181480
>>2181448At this point it's a lot of different things. the most recent one was sort of specific to a community so it wouldn't make a ton of sense to describe without context
There is one that I actually saw at least a few nonas describing something similar to on here before. I have always had something that's kinda like gender dysphoria, but not in the way people usually mean it. I don't believe you can change (from either mtf or ftm), I'm mostly happy with my body, I think being a woman is very wonderful even if difficult sometimes, and I don't look even the slightest bit masculine in body type and even have a few very stereotypically feminine interests. But I have a persistent sense of "social dysphoria" if that makes sense. When I hang out with women I feel like a retarded bumbling man who's missing a million cues flying over his head and is hopelessly separated from womanhood. That's the only way I know how to describe it, I feel like a dude larping and imitating, like those posts of troons trying to blend in among women and everyone, himself included, can tell that something is off in the air. I desperately want female friends but never manage to click with them. Something about the way most women talk is like a different language to me. But I am actually a woman, and I know that I am a woman, I know that being a woman is biological and not a particular stereotype or archetype, and I want to be a woman.
It's really hard to explain exactly, that's just the only way I've been able to verbalize it so far. But it's hard to find similar experiences. Pro-trans stuff just pushes you to consider trooning out and anti-trans stuff just aggressively affirms that your sex is your sex and that's final (not something I need a reminder for as I already know).
Many people have thought that I am autistic and maybe that's part of it, for me there's just a specific gendered struggle with it. I have an easier time talking to men for whatever nebulous reason and it makes me feel sad because women are so wonderful and I am so envious of female friendships and grew up watching from the sidelines wishing I could be a part of it, but never managing to find my way in, and it makes me feel broken and dumb and sometimes like there must be something disgusting about me that women can notice.
No. 2181481
>>2181473>they will want to know what's wrong and I can't tell them. So they will be mad at me for refusing to tell them. what
do some breathing exercises, she's just a person, ugly guy or not lol
No. 2181493
>>2181485how do they thrive off of people having heart problems? genuinely, i want to know so i can research further. please explain instead of making fun of me. i don't know why you felt like you needed to do that.
also, i know not all sugar is bad. there's natural sugar in fruit that women with pcos can have in moderation. what i was ranting about is the unnecessary added refined sugar. there is a difference. a vegetarian diet wouldn't work for me, it would make it difficult to eat enough protein. i need to be on a high protein diet.
No. 2181495
>>2181480Aw
nonnie I'm sorry you feel this way in female conversations. I have experienced this before myself. It might be a little different from how you experience it exactly, but I will try to offer my best advice.
In my experience, it was a combination of low self esteem, social anxiety, awkwardness in general, and low socialization. Women scared me for a while. I did play into the nonbinary stuff for a while because it was easier to hide behind a label and distract myself with that than to admit I really am a woman despite the awkward and uncomfortable feelings socializing with women brought me. But that only lasted a bit in high school and I got over it, but still felt so fucking stupid talking to women. I only had male friends for a bit because, like you said, socializing was easier and less stressful.
I guess the thing that helped me out was again a combination: working on self esteem, telling myself that it is okay to feel awkward, it is okay to not know what to say, it is okay to "not click" with people, looking up basic conversational guides and how-tos, reminding myself that women are literally just people kek and that one woman not responding positively socially doesn't make YOU a failed woman (it just means you don't click as people) and just letting myself be awkward as fuck. Also in my experience males can usually be a bit easier to talk to, because there is a good chance that they might find you a bit attractive. Not trying to make anything awkward for you but it's just to remind you of what is likely.
I still feel awkward in a lot of conversations with women, but it's something I think you can work on. I don't think it's anything you should stress too much about because it can be fixable. I get shy around a lot of women still, but in my experience they're always so open to conversation if you know how to have smalltalk and seem genuine and ask questions in response. People loooove to be asked questions.
God speed nona.
No. 2181512
>>2181444I feel so angry for you
christ
No. 2181530
File: 1727403541888.png (1.33 MB, 1080x2400, 1000017008.png)
I'm an object. I'm SUBHUMAN. I don't deserve to be loved. I don't deserve to have a normal social life. I don't deserve to have a family.
My life makes no fucking sense.
I'm just a black dog
No. 2181584
File: 1727408971149.jpeg (43.77 KB, 275x264, IMG_2345.jpeg)
I hate being ignored on here. You guys are my only friends. Also I miss the bunkers. Don’t know what the image says I just thought it looked funny
No. 2181593
>>2181587I see this, I was treated like an adult when I was a chubby kid and I'm treated like an old hag even though I'm just 29 years old.
I know being fat ages you a lot, but you would think people would bypass this first impression and remember who you are as a person.
A girl I know who is kind of fat, she's 15 years old and she's not only treated like an adult but she also has like, internalized being perceived as an adult? It's crazy seeing that irl, but then you see the little sister of a friend of mine, who is skinny as fuck and the same age as this other girl, and she's treated like a retard baby, there's no in-between.
No. 2181594
>>2181587I noticed this too kek, my family treated me the worst when I was at my highest weight, especially my mom. I think deep down it was because she was insecure about her own weight and she was angry that she couldn't "protect" me from falling down the same rabbit hole and she expressed that through anger at me.
These days I'm losing weight and whenever I see my family they're much happier to see me and it's always the first thing they mention and really the only thing they compliment about me. The only thing they talk about is my looks, how much weight I've lost, my hair etc… At first it made me excited and motivated to lose more but now that I think about it it's sad. I wish they would compliment me about my achievements or personality.
No. 2181603
File: 1727410158600.jpg (752.74 KB, 1992x3070, 1000017012.jpg)
MAKE IT END ALREADY GOD WHY ME
No. 2181754
>>2181752have you considered writing your own book
nonny? you can read it as youre writing
No. 2181797
>>2181445same here. every time I talk about this one specific experience I have it gets ignored by nonnas and I end up deleting it
>>2181787this website was created to shit on famous women. this is not radblr. kek
No. 2181824
>>2181820Why are you talking like an anime,
nonnie?
No. 2181843
>>2181837>>2181840Ok not
murder him, just send him a message! Also I should've specified it's been 7 years since I encountered him face to face, has has spoken to my family members over recent years and still continues to.
No. 2181854
>>2181843Why are you acting like an anime,
nonnie?
No. 2181915
File: 1727424630826.png (254.29 KB, 1242x1168, oouu.png)
>>2181913Nonnie, I googled the word "oouu" next to lolcow.farm and this is just the first 4 that came up kek
No. 2181992
>>2181987True. I remember seeing a reel of a woman caked in fakeup saying
>I don't trust women who don't wear any makeup. Not even a little lipstick? Or some crap like that. Fucking disgusting and retarded beyond belief
No. 2182017
File: 1727431014474.jpg (536.92 KB, 1080x917, 1000017005.jpg)
Wow I surely love having the whole planet harass me while I'm struggling with severe mental and physical illness all by myself. Having dehumanizing references made towards me because I'm chronically ill is so nice
No. 2182129
So in the end, nothing matters and everyone sucks. I got nagged and mocked by my family yesterday during my birthday because I should stop acting like people can change, I came back here too early because this shit opens at 9 am but the supposed entry time is 8 am.
Like, then what's the point of doing anything? I should just get AI to make a class for me and that's it, I should just kill myself anyways because the educational system is shit in every single level.
Seriously though, I told everyone that I fucking hate teaching and that I did this because there was no other option, I hate having to deal with any sort of public.
But then I'm the one who is being dramatic and everyone makes fun of me for getting frustrated.
Then what the fuck do I do? I just wanted to work at an editorial group or some shit and never interact with people, I told my family this ever since I was 13 years old, I've been telling my family that I despise teaching ever since I was 9 and noticed how teachers are treated like dirt.
But I'm being unreasonable and I should relax.
Then what fucking is it?
What fucking fuck is it?
Should I relax and just be mediocre? Should I still try to be good at teaching? Like what the fuck do I fucking do?
I just hate this shit, I've hated this shit since forever, I don't even know what the fuck I want to do anyways because this career is useless and retarded, I wasted my time studying useless shit that nobody even cares about, starting from me btw.
I should've listened to my friend when we were in college and dropped out right there right then, I could've done something else like killing myself or studying something useful like accounting or administration, maybe then I would've been more than this lesser thing I'm right now.
God I want to fucking die, I hope I suffer from an aneurysm, that I get crushed by some metallic thing or that I suffer a sudden heart attack or whatever else, just give me cancer and kill me already, I'm sick of this shit.
No. 2182131
File: 1727439332098.jpeg (100.79 KB, 736x846, IMG_1620.jpeg)
I hate how normies and particularly straights look at you when god forbid you simply tell them that you don’t think that the married straight life is for you for various reasons. Also when they act oh so bamboozeled when you refuse any form of straight relationship when they also go and complain to you how hard the married life is and how they can’t stand their partner.
I had a talk with my mom and while I can’t blame her since she grew in another time, the marriage and natalist propaganda was way stronger and live in a very traditionalist country, I was kinda angry when she said something in the lines of “I don’t know, something happened to you in order to have this repulsion towards meeting guys and marriage, it’s not like you”. Granted, nothing bad happened to me growing up, nor lived in an abusive household (my dad kinda liked alcohol tho and was emotionally distant, but wasn’t abusive like in most cases), but I just hated how she said it like there is something wrong with me for refusing this life of becoming a secondary character in my own life while being married to a moid. Then, she went on how living alone has disadvantages too, which I get in a way, but it ain’t that bad how most straights make it out to be and then said that I’m pretty smart to choose a good guy - that’s the very reason I’m attached to no guy lmfao. Oh, also the “but being in a relationship with a guy will help you grow” - in what way grow? Grow my chances of early death and depression? kek
No. 2182142
File: 1727440006351.jpg (122.43 KB, 1008x1200, 1000003105.jpg)
i don't work today but i can tell by the tone of the text that my boss wants me to work today. i don't want to, please don't make me…
No. 2182177
File: 1727441992178.jpg (457.9 KB, 2048x1536, 1000016965.jpg)
I don't wish my life upon nobody.
No. 2182211
>>2182196I'm mentally and physically ill. To the point where it has turned me bed ridden. I'm in 8/10 pain. I couldn't keep up with my studies or work because of how severe both my mental and physical illness are. I don't really have a family. I'm kind of in the same position as a homeless person. I don't have friends. I don't have a boyfriend. There's absolutely nobody involved in my life.
The whole planet is harassing me.
I'm seeing everyone move on with their lives. Getting married. Be in love. Go on trips.
While my life is deprived of anything.
There's nothing good about my life.
Just endless pain and misery. Having someone genuinely involved into my life would make things much easier.
No. 2182248
>>2182224I tried everything
nonnie. I already come from a broken family. I've been on 6 antidepressants. Antipsychotics. Was admitted to the hospital endless of times. Was in the mental hospital multiple times. There's no "help" that I can receive. The only help that I could get is having someone genuinely involved in my life. Being treated with decency for once.
I'm constantly basically on the same level as a homeless person because my disability makes it impossible for me to maintain employment. Somehow, I am expected to miraculously come up with money to spend on doctors. When people with friends, families, significant others, stable support systems are not being sent to therapy like I am.
It would have been millions of times easier if I had friends and a supportive husband/boyfriend. Nobody's ever actually been fully involved in my life.
When I went to therapy. I realized that the therapist has a wife. That he loves her. He has a family with her. If something bad would happen to her. He would take care of her.
While I am continuously depressed because I am deprived of love, support, any kind of social authority.
The therapist won't give a shit about me if I become unable to get out of bed or if I throw myself off a building.
To this moment where I have reached my limit. Where my life is deprived of anything. Everyone is telling me to go to therapy.
I've been treated worse than an animal in the medical system. Animals in shelters are treated with more dignity than I have been.
But that's how I have been made to feel my whole life. Like I don't have feelings, needs, rights.
Everyone's telling me to kill myself in a sense. To this moment where I have dreads in my hair and live in filth. Someone is trying to drain something out of me.
In my case. Nobody has even tried. Nobody ever will.
I wanted my life to turn out well. I tried my best. That's it. I don't have any normal interaction with anybody and I am too scattered to be able to carry a normal and meaningful conversation with someone.
I just wish that someone would love me for once. For the rest of my life. I don't want to be alone anymore
No. 2182274
File: 1727446301478.jpeg (31.8 KB, 637x557, IMG_2399.jpeg)
I’m certain I’m going to kill myself eventually. Not anytime soon, but I can’t imagine myself going on to live into middle age. It’s not out of vanity or anything, I have friends who are terrified of aging for whatever reason, but it’s not that. I just can’t imagine a life for myself. In a way it’s frustrating. I’m relatively successful compared to my peers, I’ve always been a high achiever. I had a shit childhood and a shit family life but if anything I overcame it. I just still feel so empty and hollow at my core. I’ve tried to get better and I have a good support system for the most part. Relationships have only ever made things worse. It sounds so emo and pathetic but I just think there’s something fundamentally missing from my core and it means I’ll never be able to live a normal life. I tried to kill myself at the start of the year and it honestly just felt like I was bringing the inevitable to fruition. I’m not sad about it, but I think the realisation has made things weird because I feel like I need to distance myself from everyone so that in the future when I do it nobody will actually care.
No. 2182302
>>2182274>>2182295Personally I think life is worth living for the little things. I know this sounds so cliche, but I stopped being suicidal or thinking "I will kill myself soon" when I stopped seeking happiness in big things. Like having a really successful career, having a boyfriend, making something out of myself, being important etc… What makes me happy is things like smelling the chilly autumn air, having a nice chat with a friend, calling my family, taking a night at walk while listening to music, looking at the sky and seeing a bunch of beautiful stars. Even cracking open a nice crisp diet coke kek. Those are the times when I think "wow, maybe it's worth it to keep going to experience these nice things."
I really hope you find reasons to keep going
nonny. The world is a better place with you in it.
No. 2182383
My best friend and I were planning on having a picnic after I get off work, so when I got off I ran home to change into a pretty cream-colored dress I have. It’s light sweater material with cute brown decorative buttons down the middle, so I felt it was comfy but elegant, perfect for memorable photos at a sunset picnic with my friend.
Walking to the train, a random woman yells out her car window to me, “You fat ass bitch that white dress is too small!”
I immediately tear up, try my best to not cry but end up bawling in the train station while I wait for my train to go to my best friends house. I go to her house & change into an oversized t-shirt immediately, that dress was always one of my favorite dresses for many years, I now never want to wear that dress again.
I don’t understand why people are so evil. How can people be so heartless.
I have bad social anxiety so living in a big city is already difficult for me, I had issues with disordered eating for so many years growing up and have been bullied a lot, I seriously never want to leave the house after this.
What hurts is I know that comment meant nothing to that woman, she was just hatefully yelling at a random fucking stranger. She’ll probably forget she said it in the next week, if not the next day. But now one of my favorite dresses will never feel the same, and I’ll always be wondering if someone is looking at me thinking my clothes are too small. I want to buy a new wardrobe that’s 3 sizes too big disappear.
No. 2182450
File: 1727454189059.jpg (114.42 KB, 1080x789, 674300-2478198634.jpg)
Why are modern newfags so entitled?
>think oldfags and farmers older than them should leave the site
>demand that things they don't like gets banned from a thread even if it's explicitly allowed in the thread
>get mad when they get banned for not following the only rule of a thread (Bechdel test thread)
Have some fucking respect or get off our lawn.
No. 2182460
>>2182420Weird thing to ask. The answer to your question is just "men", that should be obvious.
>>2182340I'm sorry nona. I know this is an imperfect solution but maybe you could try to find out a shared interest or hobby between you guys and steer the conversation that way instead? Or generic pop culture shit? If you're comfortable with it, you could lie about having had a messy break-up or something and say that's why you'd rather not talk about relationships.
No. 2182512
File: 1727458346874.jpg (168.67 KB, 2000x1150, 1719236436004.jpg)
Sometimes I wish I had a friend group, since in my 29 years I never had one. But then when I remember all the talking and caring I'd have to do, it puts me off. It just sounds like so much work and to be honest I'm not really lonely. I actually noticed that the only time I feel like I need company is right before my period lol
I just wish I didn't feel broken for not really wanting or caring about company
No. 2182692
>>2180399Anon, I thought at first that you were from Syria or Yemen, so this is actually a slight relief. You are still in a terrible situation, but there is a slightly higher possibility of escape. We'll have to come up with a different reason for you to make a passport, but your situation isn't hopeless. Hopefully you're still in this thread to read my massive reply.
Remember, I'm not telling you that you need to get everything done right now. In every story I've heard from women who left dangerous countries, it's usually best for them to bide their time until they have enough resources and education to safely make a move. Some anons are suggesting for you to try and run away ASAP in the middle of the night, but I wouldn't recommend it if you aren't in immediate danger. Finish your education, build up your experience and credentials, and start saving up money. During this time period, try to get ahold of your important papers, including the birth certificate you mentioned. You may need them for identification reasons related to school, work, or money. Tell your parents something like, "You two deserve to rest and relax. You've done so much for your children! I want to learn how to take care of myself as much as possible so that you two won't be forced to do so much for me!" It might take a while to convince them, so keep bringing it up occasionally.
Even if you have massive resentment for your family, you are stuck with them for now and you'll have to work with that. If you can manipulate them in just the right way, you might be able to get some cooperation from them. In almost every story I've heard, it helps a lot if you can convince them that all the things you want to do are for the good of the family. Try using this reason to convince them of why it's important for you to go to school and get a job. That might get them to be less annoying about it. Most of the immigrant women I met used some variation of this argument: "Right now, I have the two of you to take care of me. But after you are gone, my poor brother/cousin/etc will have to take care of me! What if he already has his own family and children to feed by then? I will be draining money from their household. Look how much conflict is going on in the world and how badly it affects our economies. I could end up being such a burden on their house. All I want is to be able to help them."
As you are working on your education and career, wait for a reason to pop up so that you can make a passport. Maybe one of your parents will become ill enough that they will need to seek medical treatment, and you can convince them to see a foreign doctor. Maybe someone you know will move to a neighboring country and you'll want to visit them.
You can still try convincing them to let you travel for religious reasons, but with a different destination than Mecca. You might have better ideas than me, since I have limited knowledge of Islam's holy sites. I've heard of a couple of famous holy places outside of Saudi Arabia, such as the great mosque of Damascus. You could start dropping subtle hints to your family about how great and important that place is, and how amazing it would be to visit and see the architecture. Once they know that it is your "dream" to visit that place, you can start pushing them to let you go there, maybe with your father or a male relative as a guardian.
If you don't want to go to Syria, you could try another cool-looking, important site that strict, religious parents would approve of. In Turkey, they have the Suleymaniye Mosque, which is a UNESCO world heritage site. If you have a brother, you could try subtly convincing him that it would be cool to go to one of these places, and then convince your parents to let you go along.
If you have a male sibling/cousin/etc, another strategy I've heard of is to convince HIM to move to another country for better opportunities, and then convince your parents to let you get a passport so you can visit him.
Once again, it will likely take some time to put together and perform an exit plan, but it's worth a try. I would use the Blue Card program as a plan A, and then one of the other programs as plan B if it doesn't work out. Those programs can get you out of your country quickly, but it's hard to use them to establish yourself in a host country long-term. Some people use them to jump from country to country whenever the time limit on their stay runs out.
By the way, since I don't get to speak to a lot of Saudi women, I would like to ask you about the passport/travel situation in your country, if it's okay. In western countries, lot of the information that gets published about Saudi Arabia is heavily censored and biased, so we don't always get to see reality. Back in 2019, it was widely reported that Saudi laws were changed, and that women would be able to apply for their own passports without the permission of a guardian. It was also said that anyone over the age of 21 would not need permission to leave the country. Are either of these things true? Sometimes journalists claim that a progressive law is going to be created, but years later we find out that the law was never actually passed.
No. 2182702
File: 1727467309251.png (412.09 KB, 1376x508, wheel of fortune.png)
Greetings loved ones, let’s take a journie
No. 2182703
I feel like my previous boss emotionally fucked me over. I have a lot of religious and familiar trauma that I never got totally over with, but after a few years I was able to cope better and developed a more positive outlook in life. Then I started working at this job where my boss was a psychologist, and I genuinely trusted her at the beginning, so I confided my past to her, but she started using it to psychoanalyze every single thing I did, work-related or not. She would try to keep digging info about me, and when I finally shut her out, she started weaponizing my trust issues to make me talk.
It took years for me to get better mentally and a lot of the progress vanished in a few months because of that bitch. I'm starting to get better little by little, but I don't think I'll ever trust a psychologist ever again. She basically did the same thing to a co-worker to the point said co-worker had to see a therapist, and worst of all ¡, my ex-boss does it all under the guise of being some sort of maternal figure while her own life falls apart because she's a pick me that can't move on from her ex. She's one of the few people I genuinely hate.