File: 1562135337784.jpg (53.98 KB, 500x666, darklight.jpg)
No. 429607
My stupid fucking dog is driving me up the god damn wall. I barely got any sleep last night because I had a bad stomach ache and kept getting woken up to go shit. I woke up this morning and she was barking around the time my alarm went off, fine, this usually happens. I give her her medicine and her breakfast, opt to skip breakfast myself so I can sleep in for an extra hour because I’m sleepy as fuck.
I live with my parents and my dog prefers to sleep in their room, it’s fine, they like her and raised her for the majority of her life (we got her when I was super young). I have to get up and take her out of the room when she starts barking because my parents dont get that you can’t just THROW PILLOWS at a dog to get it to shut up, especially now that she’s got a bad back and walking issues, so I swoop in and take her out and close the door. She’s also on orders from the vet for NO WALKS (shes housetrainer) because of her back, fine whatever, she doesnt really have any interest in going outside anymore anyway.
She made me get up from trying to go back to sleep SIX FUCKING TIMES to open the door to my parents room for her, only to immediately walk back out. I couldn’t just open the door and walk away, I did it the first time and she started barking at my dad and woke him up- bad sign, so I took her out and closed the door. She just kept fucking barking. I open the front door so she can walk around in the hallway, maybe she really wants to get out of the apartment, NOPE. She took like two steps outside and her tail fell down and she walked back in.
Holy shit I love my dog and we just went through a big scare where we thought she was dying, but she drives me up the fucking wall every god damn morning.
No. 429611
Guide for newfags on how to fit in on Lolcow:
1.Don’t actually sage any thread, but make sure to let everyone know you are saging the thread because you hate the topic, and if anyone points out that's not the correct use of sage, start an argument while insisting you are using sage correctly.
2.Spam image macros, memes and copypasta in every thread. Come up with new forced memes to spam if possible.
3.Bring up the same topics with the same complaints, and no text or discussion value at the same time everyday.
4.Make sure to randomly accuse people of samefagging whenever possible
5.Use a tripcode, the more obnoxious the better
6.Repeatedly claim to be an oldfag and that Lolcow was "better in the old days"
7.Constantly express your hatred for the cows, or even any of the past admins, claiming to have top secret information on who they are and what they do in their personal lives.
8.Go into every thread and tell everyone to go back to the GC or pink pill thread
9.Randomly tell people made up stories about how autistic you are, preferably while hijacking an existing discussion
10.Post pictures of random incels, pretend to be attracted the person in the picture and ask why he doesn't have a girlfriend
11.Make blog posts in the /meta/ complaints thread everyday, telling people who disagreed with you, who you disagreed with, and asking why you received a 2-hour ban
12.Make posts crying about how all anons are femcels and radfems
13.Start arguments over whether something is considered "milk" or not.
No. 429613
>>429611I forgot
14. Racebait as much as possible. Complain about East Asians, Southeast Asians, whites, blacks. Anything goes. Particularly, claim that any one race of women is ugly or fat or jealous or ages poorly or panders to pedophiles or wants to be another race. This will start a chain reaction, every time.
No. 429626
I had to move temporarily to my parents' house since Friday and I'm already losing my shit.
If I wanted to cover everything wrong with them from the beginning, I'd write a long-ass post in shitty parents thread, but long story short, I moved out as soon as I graduated high school. When I had to briefly move back three years later, I ended up in mental hospital. Since then I avoid spending more than 3 days in a row with them.
They're helping me with furnishing my apartment now and I actually genuinely appreciate this. However, I'm constantly bullied into doing whatever they want and I keep getting ignored, talked over, gaslighted and treated like a dumb teenager. Just today my stepmother called me while I was at work to berate me for something I was supposed to do and literally didn't let me have a word in my defense, then hung up when I tried to say something. My colleague came to my room while I was talking with her, and was visibly disturbed by this, especially since my stepmother was very audible despite loudspeaker being off.
The sad thing is, plenty of people, both strangers and acquainted, notice this shit, but nobody evered dares to point it out to them. I'm a nervous wreck whenever I need to confront my parents over anything, so I avoid any conflict or even discussion altogether.
No. 429628
>>429623What
>>429625 said, basically. Which one applied to you?
No. 429685
I had a crush on a self proclaimed "nice guy" in high school. I really liked him, but he seemed to have crush and ask out literally any other girl but me. After they all rejected him, he jokingly asked if I'd date him and I basically told him to fuck off. It hurt. A lot. To this day, I'm still wildly fucking attracted to him. He's very sweet on a personal level, actually very politically liberal. He doesn't have very many friends, and chases off most women because he shows very clear signs of Aspergers. He has a tendency to respond to everything literally, with random facts. If you mess up a movie quote, he'll correct you no matter the context, with the most serious face. It annoys the shit out of even his closest friends after a while, but I like being around him and enjoy our conversations. I feel like I can be myself around him. He's very intelligent, has interest in the most stereotypical nerdy careers like code and computers. Unfortunately, it also comes paired with an obsession with vidya and anime. When he's not with friends or at work, he's in his dark room all day playing video games. He's pays for hentai and follows insta cosplay thots. I wish I was attractive to him and that we could have a normal relationship, but it is what it is.
No. 429697
>>429683Are you that anon who asked about things you should visit in Nice in another thread? I don't know how guys are in the USA so I can't really compare but I wouldn't be too surprised if some guys are behaving that way because you're a tourist and it's obvious to them. It's almost always obvious when someone is a tourist from outside of Europe without them even talking or doing anything special most of the time. They may think they can get away with being assholes or perverts because you'll be gone eventually. At least you're not alone and you're with your boyfriend so your bf will prevent a lot of guys from talking to you with bad intentions.
>>429687Not really from the south but I don't get why all the disgusting old farts are always playing pétanque together while drinking beer.
No. 429721
>>429702Yeah, this is true. I've found "classical" nerds in that sense can still be mouthbreathing assholes as well. Honestly unless they're mildly charismatic or you like the same things they will be definitely boring, there's a
reason for the stereotype.
>>429692They exist, in smaller numbers. Hate to say it but most male nerds like that are older and sometimes married with kids. My boyfriend is still into some weebshit and has a few games he likes but mostly partakes in those things because of me, otherwise probably is the epitome of the old-timey engineering nerd minus the overinflated ego. And he's in his 20s. So I mean, you can find them, if it's absolutely no anime/vidya it'll be harder since there's so much hobby overlap and usually people at least like a few, but non-braindead hentai-vidya addict male nerds exist. It's just slogging through the mountains of shit to find them.
>>429685Sure he's smart, but you're better than this. Stop running after a man who doesn't want you, he's probably got stupid standards from his fap fantasies, tries to run after any girl with a pulse from the sounds of it (other than you.) and doesn't deserve your anguish. Does he have any actually constructive hobbies other than playing vidya in a dark room? Please try to move on.
>After they all rejected him, he jokingly asked if I'd date him and I basically told him to fuck off.This story here was enough to write him off. If he doesn't apologize and actually make an attempt to make good, why should you waste your time? Try to think with your self-worth.
No. 429738
File: 1562180457498.png (48.81 KB, 312x474, pc 5.PNG)
>is there such a thing as a positive vent?
OMFG I'm so proud right now, my S.O. and I were discussing the kpop industry and he brought up the "female porn" industry, I'm on cloud nine, and I wanted to share this little thing that made me very happy.
PS: boyfriend had problems with porn before, and he is getting better it seems
No. 429750
Falling in love was the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. Ever since I started this new relationship, my views about everything from love to politics have changed and I'm worried that I'm losing myself in this relationship. I moved across the country away from my abusive family to live with my boyfriend.
He's awesome and supportive, but I realized that he isn't always receptive to things that he can't understand, and not in an intellectual way, but hobbies, political beliefs, etc. different from his own. I know I'm beginning to agree or play down some of my opinions. I'm a radical feminist and I don't support trans theory, but he doesnt like "TERFS" so I don't mention that his insistence on calling men women is fucking crazy, even though I know for a FACT, he would call me out and probably curse me out if I said something clearly incorrect about something, especially Trump.
No. 429772
>>429762I feel the same at times because I wouldn't be showered with presents and compliments.
But I want to reassure you that every individual is different than the other, some like to use their words and some don't prefer it, you might ask him to change that occasionally or change yourself into accepted that your man isn't an affectionate lad.
No. 429778
>>429761nta but you better start saving what you can for if it doesn't work out and you need to leave. Try to save toward first months rent and security deposit. Don't fucking tell him either.
Just be realistic.
No. 429815
>>429687Shame I didnt know that, but I did notice a lot of the guys here are really shameless and Im from a southern part of the US where street harassment and catcalling is common yet somehow this topped it lol. Me being an obvious foreigner or tourist looking person doesnt help
>>429697Im more near Toulouse not Nice: But yeah you are completely right. The guys in my boyfriends family are perverted too ugh
This shit is really depressing as hell lmao my mood is horrible
No. 429823
I'm so annoyed at myself right now even though it's silly. I'm a very hairy woman, have been ever since I was a kid; I have dark excessive body hair all over, and it seems like more than the average woman. I've tried various forms of hair removal (shaving, waxing, creams, etc.) to find what works best and it's always a struggle. Shaving can take nearly an hour, especially if I'm not consistently removing the hair on a daily basis.
Until I randomly decided to try a men's electric shaver…and it worked so fucking well! It literally only took me about ten minutes to shave my whole body, a fraction of the time it took me with women's razors. No pain, no cuts, smooth shave. Why the hell wasn't I doing this before? It's like I had this subconscious mentality of "oh I'm a women therefore I should obviously only buy products marketed towards women" (plus I like the cute packaging lol) but now it seems so obvious the shaving products for men would be so much better-especially when my body hair is probably more on par with a man's. Can't believe I wasted so much time and money on crappy pink plastic when the answer was right next to it.
Same thing happened with deodorant. As a teen I only bought female deodorant until I noticed it wasn't strong enough during the summer, tried a men's one and it worked perfectly. But my mom made me feel embarrassed for needing to use a men's product ("You use MEN'S deodorant anon? Why would a girl need men's deodorant, you sweat that much?!"), and made me feel like my body was gross and wasn't very feminine since it need "men strength" products. It's so fucking dumb; if it works, it works, who cares who it's made for?
TL;DR: Gendered products suck.
No. 429824
>>429762Anon, I don't think it'll change unless you mention that it bothers you. Tell him that you feel kind of bad that he doesn't compliment you very much or go down on you, etc, because you need to feel appreciated. If he shoots back with some bullshit, say that many/most women need that, or say it's how you communicate/receive affection.
>>429772 is also right in saying people express themselves differently.
I'm lucky in that I crave that and get a lot from my boyfriend, I would feel very emotionally neglected if I didn't. Honestly, is it worth staying with someone who doesn't appreciate you? Even if you're "ugly" I don't see why you can't meet a man who likes to have sex with you.
No. 429836
>>429827No one will really care. Or, people are usually polite enough at cons to not say something. If someone actually makes a rude comment within your vicinity to you, punch them lol. No one really has the gall irl to make shitty, unnecessary comments knowing full well they might get a well deserved punch to the face. Sometimes I might look at someone's costume and think not the nicest thing, but I keep it to myself, and I feel like most cosplayers I've come across are like that. Unless youre some big name bitch, people probably won't even remember how bad your costume might be in like 5 minutes.
I have this fear all the time, and even after making costumes and attending cons for the better part of the past decade, it always crops up. Once you put on that costume and start chilling around with your friends, it's fine! Have fun anon! Are you going to AX?
No. 429850
My bf literally can’t get a boner unless I start touching myself. Literally the only way he can get turned on is if I start rubbing my clit and acting like I like it. The problem is that I don’t feel much from rubbing my clit? Like, it pretty much does nothing for me. Nothing feels good enough on my clit except vibrators, I don’t like touching my clit during sex because I can’t do anything with my hands that feels good enough to actually do it. If anything it’s distracting. Once he gets hard and starts fucking me he always tells me to rub my clit and it’s just annoying and distracting but he apparently needs me to do it THAT BADLY to cum. I have told him multiple times that it doesn’t do anything significant and he seems to doubt me every time and/or doesn’tIt take me seriously. Or, he believes me and just expects me to do it anyway for him. He won’t compromise with me about doing other foreplay either. I LOVE pleasuring him and that’s what turns me on, seeing him pleasured. Bjs, handjobs, ANYTHING, but he doesn’t like those apparently except occasionally. Fuck, I get way more turned on from HIM touching my clit or fingering me because ita not my own hand, but nope he’d rather me do it most of the time.
In the beginning of our relationship, he could get hard all the time and this was never a problem, I know the decrease in sex is something that happens naturally in relationships(we have been dating for almost a year) but this is really fucking frustrating because he doesn’t even want to try most of the time to have sex with me. I have to initiate all the time and his attitude in general just seems really lazy and indifferent towards sex which really turns me off. It makes me especially mad because I feel my desire for him sexually has not changed since we started dating. We used to have sex every day and now it’s like 1-2 times a week. I know that might not sound that bad to some of you reading this but this is coming from 2 people who have high sex drives. He said before he had a girlfriend he jack off up to 4 times a day, and when he got with me initially we would sometimes fuck up to 2 times a day or atleast 4/7 days of the week.
I’m angry because I feel like he’s just to lazy and complacent to actually try to do anything about it. His job isn’t a demanding job at all so I know that’s not it. He treats it like it’s something he can’t do anything about and just tells me to go masturbate and that will solve the problem but ITS NOT THE SAME THING LOL. I want to have sex with someone I love I don’t even care if I don’t cum because I don’t NEED to to enjoy sex? If I want to cum I can just use a vibrator literally ANY time I want. I like feeling attractive and I workout and lift(glutes only) 5 days a week, I’m very attractive and it know It because of my appearance. I am in perfect shape and I literally have nothing I would change about my body right now. I am very confidant. But I don’t turn him in enough somehow to give him a boner.
This is making me more and more angry and resentful of him each time I get turned down. It makes me want to cheat but I don’t want to do that because I love him and he has been cheated on in the past by his ex. Masturbating doesn’t ent help, it needs to be sex, with two people involved. I want that intimacy so so so so SO FUCKING BAD. I feel like if I had it I wouldn’t be so fucking stressed all the time. Every time I think about how he used to jack off for times a day everyday before he met me, but now apparently doesn’t require sex except once a week has got me really fucking angry and confused. I know he’s not watching porn because I check his history frequently, he doesn’t know i even can see it. I check a lot because my ex had a porn addiction that really fucked up my trust in men when it comes to porn and admitting to watching it. I feel like I’m going insane and that I’m being crazy and selfish but I don’t know. I’ve talked to him many times and he never has anything to say for it except excuses (I’m too tired, work stress, depressed). I hate it.
No. 429862
>>429853He could be, but I trust him. We see each other every day and have similar work schedules. Most of the time he is home I am home(we live together), I know his routines and he never does anything suspicious (like disappearing for a long period of time, taking long in the bathroom) I know all the signs because my ex was very badly addicted. I have accused him of using porn behind my back multiple times out of frustration from being turned down for sex, and every time he gets angry saying to me that I’m not your ex and not to compare him to him. I don’t have a reason to believe he’s lying, and if he is lying he’s hiding it very very very well. The only thing keeping me from not thinking that is the fact that when we are not at work we are usually together, I would know if he was watching porn. The only time he is not with me in spare time is a couple hours in the morning that he gets up before going to work and while im sleeping. I fall asleep before him every night.
>>429855I’m with him because he is the first bf I’ve had the most in common with morally, personality wise, interest wise, hobby wise etc. he treats me amazingly and I literally have no other complaints about him. He is supportive and not emotionally manipulative like some of my ex’s.
No. 429864
>>429762maybe he just thinks you being hot is implied and that he doesn't need to say it (though it's always good to hear and be reassured of). unless his body language suggests otherwise or he doesn't seem
enthusiastic while having sex, he could just be reserved about saying stuff like that
No. 429865
>>429858Almost a year, I have scoured his all his social media before dating him because I wanted to screen him for possible porn addiction, not wanting to repeat my last relationship. He doesn’t follow and porn or nsfw models on any of his accounts. We have talked about it and he said he agreed with me doing that because he thinks guys who do it are cringey. He said he only ever used pornhub for porn. He doesn't use reddit.
>>429861Honestly I’m beginning to think this is what it is. I was so thankful to find a man who wasn’t pornsick but I guess the catch is we aren’t compatible sexually..idk
No. 429872
>>429862>>429870I think this anon is confused and mistakenly thinks you responded to her sex issue rather than to the other anon who is worried about her missing boyfriend.
not everyone ITT is talking about you, anon, check what posts people are replying to before assuming they're talking about your boyfriend's dick problems
No. 429881
>>4298586 months but I've known him for much longer, we just never shared friends with each other.
I've found his roommate's facebook account and tried to find his best friend's account but there is a facebook bug right now so I can't look at the pictures to confirm that it is indeed his best friend as I only know his first name. My bf isn't in good terms with his roommate and they work opposite hours so they barely see each other and I don't think he would know if something had happened.
Anyway I tried calling again a couple hours ago but this time it didn't go straight to voicemail, it ringed briefly and then went to voicemail so it looks like he or whoever was on the other side just hung up.
I also tried looking for his mother's phone number on the web, I found an old number out of order but at least I also found her address, I'll check on her if I still don't get any news.
It's weird because he never acted weird like this before. I don't know if I should be mad or worried and it's killing me.
No. 429884
>>429881>6 months, known for longer, never shared friendsum, what? I suck at dating, but this isn't normal is it??
You're a side chick he doesn't gaf about anymore.
No. 429912
>>429902I can't say I know all of them but he talks often about his friends and his colleagues.
I'm starting to think his dog died and my bf is shutting in… I guess I'll have to wait and see.
No. 429920
>>429913sounds like the Cotton On group. never, ever work for them.
sorry your job sucks anon, is there any way you can transfer or something?
No. 429965
>>429912aw I hope that's not the case for many reasons. maybe shoot him a text and just say something like "it's completely okay if you don't want to talk, but I'm worried about you and just need to know you're safe. If you tell me you're safe I'll leave you alone for however long you need."
I don't think it's fair of him to ghost you like this without a single word, even if it is because his dog died. You're allowed to be worried, I would be freaking out in this situation, especially if he missed plans with you and gave no notice. I hope everything is okay and if you care to/remember later I would love an update, on him and on the dog lol. Good luck anon
No. 429967
>>429955>"I'm not a child anymore!">is 16lol you just reminded me how I love everything about the Broadway show
except the main character. It's like catcher in the rye. it could be good if the main character wasn't such a whiney baby. If it were told from Ursula's PoV I would be HERE for it. Waiting for that remake.
No. 429998
>>429989Stick to your guns, you're doing the right thing as long as you're employed or soon will be (maybe it wont be as an actor or artist though). Degrees are expensive on their own, not to mention the lost income from not working all those years.
Christians are fucking nutters, dont let their nonsense dictate your life choices.
No. 430059
>>430054As happy as I am for you to see your stupid ex's downgrading, you shouldn't focus so much on it. The fixation is unhealthy.
Like for example, how do you know your ex has less sex? If the answer is 'we still talk' then that could be the reason these guys don't take you seriously.
You sound like you are probably too nice and give them more than they deserve. This includes talking to them or being friends with them after breaking up.
There's no need to have anything to do with them after the relationship unless you have children.
Don't look them up on social media, don't message them, don't worry about who they are currently dating.
Anyway, all the best anon, I'm sure you'll find someone who doesn't act like a douche.
No. 430063
>>429933I don't know what you want to major in but, can't you go to a less expensive college nearby? Or maybe a community college then transfer. Also, have you applied for financial aid? Even if you think you don't qualify for any, you should. You would be surprised. Once you get to a certain age too your parent's income doesn't matter. I personally think it's insane to go to an out of state college and pay out of pocket.
You really don't have that many options as far as finances.
1- You pay them out of pocket
2- you receive financial aid
3- loans
4- a combo of some/all
You will have to get on this if you actually want to go that school.
You can defer again. I doubt they would rescind your offer over any of this. You really should call someone at the school like the financial aid office. Good luck.
No. 430073
>>430054I used to think dating virgins would help with that entitled attitude that men have about who they date, but now I'm actually dating one and am in a similar situation to you. He was so lonely that I thought he'd be more grateful to have someone who finally loves him but it feels like all he does is compare me to other women like he thinks they'll actually give him the time of day. They are more deluded than normal men.
I hope you can move on from him and enjoy the fact that the man who used to call you fat is now fat himself. There's some justice in that.
No. 430118
>>430107Not that anon but I think there's a difference in how most female artists treat drawing sexy girls and how men do.
Lesbians/bi women usually draw even conventionally attractive women with a personality, a narrative, something that goes beyond shallow male gaze shit. When I draw conventionally attractive women I'm interested in their facial expression, the way they wear clothes, the personality they convey ; that's what I deem to be "sexy". I've never met a man who was aroused by that rather than the typical brainlet big titted anime gf shit.
No. 430120
>>430094nta I'm a lesbian and I don't mind you drawing that. In fact, having big tits myself it's nice to know other lesbians are into it because when I browse lesbian subreddits it's mostly kristen stewert type of body and it makes me feel a bit down.
sorry for the blog post
No. 430125
>>430119her character design is tragic and you have bad taste. her head is pathetically tiny. she has a literal pinhead. she's totally anatomically fucked and the games suffer because they use her unnecessary sexualization as crutch.
>>430118i think you're being too generous. the only real difference i see when it comes to lesbians or bisexuals who draw big boobed women all day is that they're more artistically skilled and understand anatomy. they highly internalize the male gazey shit when they do do this stuff and it doesn't deserve a pass just because they get turned on by it. it's one thing if their art wasn't primarily consumed by men, but it will be and it is
No. 430174
>>430107Anon you replied to and kindly fuck off, just like
>>430118 said all my sexy female characters have a developed personality, different styles and character histories. I fucking hate the narrative that lesbians have to only enjoy wholesome quirky neighborhood girls, butch warriors or mature mommy kink types. I like beautiful, sexy girls with big tits and that's that. It doesn't equal perfect harem stereotype big tiddy goth gf meant for male gaze.
>>430120Big tiddies are my favourite kind anon, I just always feel like it's shamed because the sexualization of breasts is so male-oriented. I don't find the Kristen Stewart type attractive at all.
No. 430191
>>430046I'm a Kiwi lurker because I like people watching, but it seems like the user base has grown so much that it's attracting these /pol/ mgtow self-obsessed edgelord types that are just insufferable. A lot of threads are now getting the plague tag because people can't just fuck off to their own corners of the internet anymore.
And yes, I know they were never a beacon of righteousness, but I believe that if you want to be a stupid tool on the internet then people should be allowed to discuss you on the internet. Free speech and dark humor, mate. Unfortunately, sites like that will always attract some forms of cantankerous garbage.
Personal rant ; I'm so sick of people making everything about gender and generalizing.
"Oh, this one woman did a horrible thing, bitches be crazy!" Uh, no? She's a horrible person regardless of her vag. "OMG you did this? Of course you did, you CIS man!" Uh, no? He did it because he's a thoughtless twit regardless of his penis.
Gender politics are important, don't get me wrong, but can more people just see others as… you know, people? The same can be said with any form of stereotyping and judgement (racism, ageism, albietism, ect) - I'm just noticing the gender thing more and more IRL.
No. 430193
>>430187>>430190Oh no, I didn't realize every piece of art you create needs to be a fucking political stand. Why would anyone ever use art for self-expression and creating something you enjoy and see as beautiful and desirable? How vulgar!
Honestly, you can call me a nasty pervert making the world worse all you want, you can't make me care. I don't owe anything to other artists. I'm not even a professional myself and do something completely different for my day to day job so there's no need to pander to whichever crowd feels offended by my work. I just don't give a shit. Save your pearl clutching for someone who is threatened by bleeding heart moralfags on the internet. Or your socially aware hugbox.
Oh, and I absolutely objectify sexy men too. There's just no stopping my degeneracy. In the end all it boils down to is ~le real artisté~ being salty that shallow, sexy artwork sells a lot better than ~true art~. It's not my fault the big crowd is just as horny as I am and loves fast food garbage that is sexy art.
No. 430194
>>430094Hi! I'm the Anon of the original post and I appreciate what you're saying!
But I moreso mean I do want to diversify myself SOMETIMES, but when I do I feel judged.
Because I am fat! I just don't like looking at my body and having to face that shit when I draw!! Donuts like double
oof for me do I'm prob gonna stay in my sexy art corner lmao.
>>430082Aw man thank you!! It means a lot to hear that, I just get really down a lot when I think about progress I missed out on by focusing on sexy stuff!!
>>430107Know this convo has died down (and generally sorry this caused a ruckus) but I personally really like Bayo! She's one of those REALLY fuckin cheesy and awful personalities that I grew to love.
When I was younger, still not fully sure if I was a lesbian. I defended the SHIT out of her not getting the problem.
Now that I'm older and more aware - I do see why people wouldn't like her and her design. Her proportions, even if passed off of models, were pretty weird the first game!!
I like hot girls, but I also like non conveniently attractive girls a lot too.
I think there is a convo to be had about lesbians and how sometimes they do contribute to stigmas(?) maybe. But the male gaze, in my opinion, is going to happen no matter what. I think it's a little heavy to push blame on lesbians as if they're on the same level as men if that makes sense??
No. 430195
>>430190Honestly, men will find a way to make every thing appeal to them and their fetishes even when they're not being catered to. Just look at how even Animal Crossing characters have disgusting porn made of them, or how Shadman manages to ruin everything under the sun for his retarded audience.
We can't judge whether anon's art actually caters to the male gaze without seeing it, but at least she's drawing something she enjoys. I think encouraging women to produce work according to their own tastes (regardless of whether we ourselves like those tastes) is the best way to have the art scene (and specifically NSFW art) be less saturated with men all drawing the same shit.
No. 430199
>>430195it's not a complaint about anon and her art, exactly, really. it's more about women's art that does end up getting really famous
>>430193your reaction is disproportionate to my criticism. this is what i mean with every single lesbian or bisexual woman that makes and publishes her 'sexy' art or anyone that complains about sexy art. if it's ever made by a woman, no matter how popular, it's always fine. the conversation can't even be had without lesbians or bisexual women getting overly upset. like, disagree with me all you want, but don't act like i just attacked you with a machete, it's totally ridiculous. i really don't expect anyone to change or anything, i'm just saying, the conversation can't even be had or the influence acknowledged, small as that impact may be, without people blowing up about how much they like it, so it's a huge affront to them and their sexuality
No. 430200
>>430174I love you! I wish I could support your art (and enjoy it myself)
>>430175fuck off
No. 430203
>>430193>getting this defensive over masturbating to your own tiddy artwhew ladies
>>430200Suck a titty and calm down, oppai crusader.
I draw lewd art of women too, I just don't spread it around 'cause it's not what the world needs. It's not drawing big tits that I'm mocking, but anons acting like they're heroes for doing so and reeee-ing when it's (rightfully) pointed out that scrotes are gonna crank their chodes to it anyway.
No. 430205
File: 1562261339677.png (6.51 KB, 200x200, 54856-200.png)
I might escape NEETdom soon, I'll maybe even work in a super cute environment selling fancy cosmetics.
First thing I'll do once I get a stable job is get a little (rescue) dog
No. 430211
>>430190>as a scapegoat to not think about the impact of their workThe absolute nerve. As if everyone had a strict duty to address this, and needed to scapegoat or excuse anything. Do you have even a single drop of self awareness? Pushing duties on people who don't care and attacking them for not caring (for the actions of OTHERS, no less) is a quick way to make enemies and create animosity. A quick way to make them want to do the opposite of what you say.
>>430193Rock on, anon, keep drawing whatever the fuck you like
No. 430227
>>430185I went through something similar a while back, and I just want to say I know giving up on someone that important to you is hard, but I also think you're doing the right thing.
If she can suddenly put you down like that, you aren't really her best friend. Or, maybe she has a very different idea of what friendship is. Either way, you can't have meant as much to her as she did to you, and she doesn't sound like someone who deserves to receive your friendship.
If you were as important to her, as she clearly is to you, then she wouldn't have been able to think these awful things about you. She would have resisted such an idea. So, I don't think she can have respected you, and even if it hurts, of course it's better to know.
Maybe she has a new vocabulary to put you down with, but I think this was always there within her, and I think it always will be there. As you grieve for here (and it is grief, and the fact you feel it for her and not the other way around shows who's in the right), you'll realise more and more that she wasn't as good a friend as you wanted her to be. You'll realise you were doing a lot of work, in your own head, to justify her behaviour towards you. You'll realise you're grieving for the girl you thought you knew.
I might sound edgy, but from the time my former friend told me she wanted me to burn in hell for all eternity for liking girls, until now, I've learnt two things. Firstly, it is not worth the effort to stay friends with someone like that, especially not when there are new friends to be made, who will accept you for who you are. And if you're brave enough to decide that you deserve them (and that's hard to do, I know it sounds cheesy, but it took me years,) you will find them.
Secondly? If someone tells you that they don't respect you, believe them. They mean it. If you wait for them to change, if you make excuses for their behaviour? They will hurt you, again and again, until you decide you've had enough. She's showing you her real self. If you let her, she'll make you feel like human garbage for the rest of your life.
You are not human garbage.
Sorry for multiple posts, this just felt really important for me to say and I wanted to get it right. Guess this was a lot off my chest too.
No. 430231
>>430220anon i failed mine twice and my mom had to drive me to fkn college for a while. it was embarrassing. i feel you. what made you fail?
the first testers i had were pretty rude to me and made my cry for making really small mistakes. sometimes you just need to let RNG take its course and give you a nice instructor who will treat you like a human being.
keep trying. i'm really glad i didn't give up, i love driving now.
No. 430232
>>430218Just wanted to say sorry for your experiences anon. I'm nowhere near "mannish" but I too have to step back from lolcow at times because the comments get to be too much. Depending on how much a cow is hated, they can never be good enough, and it's hard to keep seeing that on a website that mostly makes fun of female lolcows. I realize every post is behind an individual with their own issues and insecurities, but I don't see how they can't even feel a
little bad about their comments sometimes. Sometimes when I post something mean about appearances, I cringe. I'm not cringing over being mean towards the cow in question (clearly most don't care), but being mean towards whoever is reading it, relates with the flaw, and feels attacked by what I posted.
It just feels like collateral damage and I feel shitty for doing it, esp knowing I've felt that way before by posts that I've read.
I guess if I were an unfeeling chan bitch I could play it off like it never bothers me but I do think about it quite often. I try my best to watch what I type.
No. 430233
>>430220>>430231Most driving instructors are major pricks. And don't get me wrong-I know why they have to be sometimes. Their job is to be passengers in vehicles with new drivers who sometimes do undeniably ignorant shit like swerve into oncoming traffic or floor it into yards.
I just wish they wouldn't be rude over the small shit. I didn't fail my first driver's test but the guy who was my instructor made sure to let me know that I almost had. I even took driver's ed and this asshole acted like I needed to reread the literature on driving because my parallel parking wasn't good-a fail actually-and because I sped up to 17mph in a 15mph zone.
Don't give up, there are just people in this world who when given a little bit of authority tend to abuse it.
No. 430235
File: 1562271836752.jpg (143.41 KB, 470x470, b_383155638.jpg)
>go to Lidl
>see loose cherries on sale
>hell yeah, haven't had cherries in like 5 years
>sun seems to be shining brighter, birds seem to be louder etc
>go home with the purchase
>get ready for feasting
>they fucking taste like peaches or something, no cherry taste whatsoever
also they're yellow on the inside instead of red? are like western cherries different or something?
No. 430236
>>430218I'm sorry, anon. I realize it comes with the territory but the sperging about women's appearances here is ridiculous sometimes. (It's extra ridiculous in the Kpop thread where they shit on Koreans for having high beauty standards and then immediately pick apart female idols looks.)
I would recommend staying away from the "women shilled as attractive" thread if you don't already, it's pure cancer. I would also recommend keeping up with the pink pill and gender critical threads to remind yourself that others don't get to decide who gets to be a woman, or decide your value.
>>430234>honestly it's easier to read mean comments from men that mean comments from womenI feel the same.
No. 430238
File: 1562272262525.png (775.63 KB, 883x660, download (1).png)
>>430235BurgerAnnon here and I have never seen a cherry thats 'yellow on the inside'. By some quick googling I found this. Maybe you got a jamacin cherry?
No. 430244
>>430238it's lidl so I don't think it's anything THAT fancy, also these almost look like hawthorn apples? so cute! honestly not even bothered with the colour, they just taste NOTHING like cherries! like they are juicy and fresh, the right texture etc but just the taste is absent.
>>430237>>430239that's probably what it is but I'm very disproportionately stumped as I was so excited for that ~chldhood taste~ lol, have never had cherries like these so I thought it could be a regional difference maybe. had a similar disappointment when i first bought store-variety of blueberries and they tasted nothing like the forest ones, major deja vu rn
No. 430301
>>430289Because all lgbt care about the rights of poc and all poc care about the rights of lgbt, amirite?
It's only those ebul womenz who solely care about their own problems.
No. 430311
>>430307Isn't this how anyone who is/was sheltered would become aware of social issues ? They'd either learn about it from others and their experience, or experience something themselves. The latter is more likely to stick with them because of the personal aspect.
I really don't see the issue unless they never evolve past shallow "this affects me personally so it's bad, everything else is fair game" shit, and the original post didn't imply that to me.
No. 430324
File: 1562286382388.jpg (45.29 KB, 640x425, 0ec30a3e4ce7a0369e811ab0f57132…)
>>430302I think I was after sweet cherries? back home they're all called chereshnya (not sure if that's Russian for cherry or just the most popular soviet cultivar of cherries), they're big, very dark and on the sweet side but with that cherry taste still. legit thought it's like bananas or corn where altho different varieties do exist, there's only one mainstream one/not much deviation. serves me right for trusting lidl!
No. 430345
File: 1562290405221.jpeg (715.65 KB, 1572x1604, 20190704_215230-01.jpeg)
>>430329hope yours taste better than mine! I think they were from Spain, they did have that slightly lighter colour like bing does tho, pic related was the insides. maybe it's the same sort of sitch as with tomatoes where they choose the more firm and easy to transport cultivars and loose out on flavour as a trade-off? getting some educational moments out of my disappointment kek
No. 430349
>>430235>>430238Rainier cherries are yellow on the inside and taste different from the typical cherry. But I’d be surprised if you managed to find them sold loose like that if you don’t live in Washington state, and they’re golden and pink on the outside, which probably would turn you off if you were looking for red cherries.
Minor tangent, but everyone keeps managing to buy out all the Rainier cherries before I can get my hands on them. I’m gonna be pissed if I don’t manage to eat any before they go out of season,
No. 430356
File: 1562293343043.jpeg (44.96 KB, 540x521, 1560918646310.jpeg)
I always hate visiting family because of my mother. One of my aunts was telling the story of how her son almost died because they started developing seizures and one happened while he was showering. Once she was done with her story my mom had to chime in with her usual pseud-science.
>He needs to form his diet around his zodiac sign
>The sezuires are a way of his body trying to fast naturally
>Have you tried out 'my MLM'
>He should become vegan!
Its so annoying because I think I was the one who started her descent into all that hippy health stuff. When I was diagnosed with diabetes as a child she turned to natural cures to cope with it, but she never out grew the cope so she's insufferable.
Also she believes in zodiac signs to the point she's zodiac-ist.
>Someone's annoying?
>Its because they're a (zodiac sign)
Like she blames everyone's failures on their zodiac sign to the point it isn't even funny. She'll assume your entire personality on your zodiac sign. Also before anyone asks her zodiac sign is super spiritual special snowflake of the bunch.
No. 430359
>>430356I'd love to meet your mother, I'm a triple leo (sun/moon/rising) and am the most introverted, stage-frightened, don't-look-at-me bitch ever. everyone I know agrees I'm nothing like my zodiac. it's bunk.
I love being a triple leo I just wish I had literally any of the traits
No. 430382
>>430172Geez who pissed in your coffee? Just because she didn’t mention it doesn’t mean she’s bothered by it.
>>430046KF has been garbage ever since Trump got elected and it became another alt right platform. The Events and Article subfourm is by far the worst thing on that site and that’s saying something. A lot of people there are straight up racist too. At this point it’s Stormfront lite
No. 430412
File: 1562312870106.jpeg (44.88 KB, 348x499, AA8549C7-EB50-481B-ACAB-E18E7C…)
Vent/Confession?
There was a woman I worked under in a company that was basically the head of the HR department. I felt like she had it absolutely in for me because I had previously had inappropriate relations with a coworker before she even joined our company but hung it over my head. Anything deemed inappropriate she would drag me into, saying that I had a history of such behavior, I was a bad influence on newer employees, and should know better as an established employee when I literally did nothing but work in the same section as the alleged perpetrators. No one liked her and she ended up having to leave her post very early. Everyone assumed she was fired for doing a poor job and only having the bosses back even though she was suppose to be there for us. Find out later from someone in her section that she actually got breast cancer and had to take a leave of absence. I feel absolutely no sympathy for her since she made it her goal to get as many people as possible fired or on the chopping block (myself included) just to appease higher ups when that literally wasn’t in her job description. I hope all her hair fell out and she’s miserable for making us absolutely despondent and walk on eggshells for a year and a half and wrecking my career and many others with false accusations. Fucking gossip monger, go eat a cockroach.
No. 430430
File: 1562320167350.png (635.05 KB, 718x712, 15a1ab068fa461a2dfe8425ab30c18…)
>>430205Officially not a NEET anymore! I just got the job. I'm so fucking happy guys, I was really sick of being the huge loser of my group with no job and no education.
Can't wait to finally adopt a dog, it's been my dream since I was a teen but I was always either leeching off my parents and / or financially unstable.
No. 430442
>>430412Disgusting.
Imagine being so
toxic you wish someone has horrible chemo. No one wants or needs you anon. Fix yourself you're clearly damaged
No. 430457
File: 1562325203830.jpg (Spoiler Image,192.4 KB, 800x1200, EF98DC1.jpg)
>date girl with vitiligo
>start getting obsessed with it
>She leaves
>Lesbian dating pool is already very small in rural south and it's hard to find lesbians I consider physically attractive
No. 430462
File: 1562325563863.jpg (152.54 KB, 1038x576, brown.jpg)
>>430457Only sort of related to your post, but I wonder about this. In the same way that some people use melanotan to darken their skin, or glutathione to whiten their skin, has anybody tried to induce vitiligo? Is there even any substance that can do that?
No. 430520
File: 1562336826280.jpg (131.02 KB, 1200x800, 1200px-Emily_Maltese.jpg)
>>430437My dream dog is a cute maltese. But I plan to adopt a rescue dog so I'm open to every and any dog, I'll probably end up with a mutt.
No. 430524
>>430520you should look into breed specific rescue groups! I got my purebred golden retriever from a rescue.
https://www.americanmalteserescue.org is one for maltese or look up your specific state/region!
No. 430525
>>430508If he knew you in the least it's very simple to buy something thoughtful or useful. Most people even enjoy a birthday card with a meaningful message with something like a gift card someplace. He didn't need to ask, and it almost sounds like a copout. Most friends tell friends to not get them anything as a polite gesture.
He sounds like an ass, not you.
No. 430550
>>430384>Go to hospital pleasePopping in to emphasize this. I can name three people who hit their heads, felt fine afterwards, and then died later that day.
Obviously you have't died, but head injuries are a big deal. Physical trauma to the head especially insidious because your ability to gauge the severity is nullified.
Please please please see a professional. And dump your bf, ofc
No. 430561
>>430324anon thats just russian for cherry… your lidl probably just had them imported from somewhere
and maybe it's just a bad harvest, kinda with how you sometimes get strawberries that are very watery and tasteless
just bad luck
No. 430572
>>430520NTAYRT but congrats on getting a job! I hope you'll find the dog right for you. Malteses are so fucking cute, but if you do get a mutt, at least you can live with the knowledge that they'll hopefully not have as many genetic health issues that purebreds tend have!
My dad wants a maltese so bad. We have a pekingese right now, first dog I've ever had and I didn't even know the breed existed before we got her, but I'm fucking obsessed. Never though I'd be a breed loyal bitch (especially for such a pain in the ass dog), but here I am lol.
No. 430580
File: 1562345930267.gif (635.66 KB, 498x278, 3ec.gif)
I started talking to a cute boy at work, nothing serious just casual "who are you" sort of stuff. why he moved to the area, where he came from, etc. etc. (First interaction was him asking my age and I swore I thought i hear him say "Me too" but it was loud. I spaghettied and asked his star sign then) He's about an inch or two taller than be and Strong and sometimes i get to see him when he's worked up a sweaty glow.
He calls me over one day and we work together for an hour or two. He's even got a cute accent. And Tattoos.
But since I'm not an idiot I go home and put on my Miner's Helmet.
Boy's nine years older than me. Boy has a marriage cert from 2010. Boy has "Married to …" in his facebook. Boy references "two kids" in once facebook post.
Kill me now
I've read too much into his niceties
No. 430632
>>429913 me again lmao. I did a shift today with different people and jfc.
- The shop was a fucking mess. There was a pile of like 30 clothes stacked up on the only till, but I get yelled at for having a few silica packets on the floor?
- One person had their phone on loud (we aren't allowed our phones on the shop floor) and ther ringtone went off 3 times whilst they were serving. They then took all of the calls on the shop floor (they weren't work related)
- The shop wasn't closed properly at all. So many jobs weren't done, but I get yelled at if I don't do everything 100% perfectly?
- Several people made the same mistake I made the other day with the receipt log, but none of them were given a formal write up.
- The till was down A LOT, but they faked the paperowrk
I know I'm being picked on, but jfc I didn't realise it was this crazy. I don't understand why I am held to an impossible standard.
Also many customers made comments on the fact that our stuff is never full price, which is misleading because people aren't getting the deal they think they are. We've been told to tell everyone we comply with the law. We aren't even trying to pretend we aren't a scammy buisness at this point.
All of this wouldn't be that bad, but I have a terrible home life. So I have a shit day at work, then come home to more shit.
No. 430649
File: 1562354281398.jpg (78.02 KB, 683x800, pom.jpg)
>>430572You're both wrong, pomeranians are the best dogs.
But still, I hope you enjoy your puppers.
No. 430667
I decided a long time ago that I wanted to have my pet dog interred in this beautiful pet cemetery just a little bit outside of the city we live in. I knew it was going to cost me a couple grand for the cremation, plot of land, gravemarker, urn, and the one time perpetual maintenance fee to make sure her grave would never be disturbed even after my entire family passes away.
My dad decided that he wanted her buried whole. I didn't argue with him too much about it because my grandmother was cremated and he didn't get any say in it, so I feel like this is the least I could do, but it's getting ridiculous. He wanted the nicest, most expensive casket and gravemarker, and to have her picture engraved on the gravemarker. It's going to be more than double how much it was already going to cost. He said he'll cover the costs of everything else and I just have to cover the maintenance fee (still a very, very hefty amount of money), but I think it's fucking ridiculous to do so much for a pet that's not even going to be alive anymore. He constantly spends money like it's water, and my mom has to sort out how to pay for all of his stupid shit, and he's going to do it again with my dog's funeral. What's the point in driving yourself further in debt for a pet that's no longer here?
I picked out this cemetery because I wanted a place where I could come back and visit no matter where I would move to in the future, and so I didn't have to worry about moving with her ashes. I know that that's already ridiculous, having my dog interred in a cemetery, but it's what I wanted. Blowing so much extra fucking money on a stupid fancy casket and gravemarker is a whole other level. Holy shit she's a dog. She doesn't give a fuck. I'm pissed that he's okay with spending that money AFTER she's gone, when he always complained about how much her vet bills cost and was always reluctant to take her. We just had a death scare the other week, but she's doing much better now, and it'll probably cost me a couple hundred to redo all the testing and possibly more medication, but that's fine with me because the money I spend with her now to keep her healthy and with me is nothing to me. After she's gone though? What's the point other than just some basic niceties on her grave spot?
No. 430671
File: 1562357068212.png (650.68 KB, 491x535, oak.PNG)
>>430649AYRT I love poms too! But damn, put me in front of a peke and I won't be able to help but want to take it home.
Have you ever seen Oaksoosoo? Fuckin' love this pom so much
https://www.instagram.com/oaksoosoo/?hl=en No. 430704
File: 1562363732804.jpg (132.38 KB, 640x1136, 939hV8R.jpg)
family never liked me that much but they hate me for withdrawing my medical school application after I got accepted
No. 430707
>>430704This is me but with law school. For some reason I'm more reviled in my family for getting an MA than my cousins who don't have any education with one literally having a criminal record.
Suppose I don't kiss and manipulate enough ass to appease the narcissists. Oh well.
No. 430727
>>430724Reminds me of someone I know, they quit their stable job with a comfortable salary in hopes of becoming a film dierctor at the age of 32 with no past experince or projects done before except for some video edits for their seflies on imovie… now their partner is spending on them and they're literally begging for everything and won't get a minimum wage job because they're better than this.
Share the link to his channel though.
No. 430729
>>430724What a fucking idiot.
But you know what? I hope the new job opening for professor goes to a better hopeful who will be grateful for the opportunity.
No. 430738
>>430727>in hopes of becoming a film director at the age of 32 Dear god, why do some people want to live mediocre lives.
And sure anon: it's
https://www.youtube.com/user/aragusea . It's a cooking channel; one of his videos went viral and he basically got a bunch of subscribers overnight. Like I said his stuff gets a ton of views and he seems to have a decent fanbase. I just wouldn't quit my job over it.
(Not sure if this is against the rules or not but just in case: this all public information, even him quitting his job since he announced it in an article about himself that's available to the public online.)
>>430729I hope so too anon, honestly after seeing how non-committed to the job he was it seems like future students are better off with someone else.
No. 430763
File: 1562376785881.png (75.15 KB, 263x235, unknown-9.png)
My boyfriend lied to his parents to close our LDR (long distance relationship) gap and now they're pissed off at me.
We met online almost 2 years ago, and we've been planning to meet up and eventually live together after 14 months. Everything went smoothly- I transitioned easily into working in this new state and he had two jobs and his own apartment already. He's 20, I'm 22.
I recently made a facebook to talk to my family after being homesick and he mistakenly posted our relationship status publically and his mom had seen. He didn't realize she would see, so when she did and texted her, it turned out he lied. A lot.
About where I'm from, how we met, what I've been through. Everything. She confronted him about this and he expected me to completely play along as if I knew anything about it at all. I'm pissed and sick to my stomach because I've been completely open and honest about our relationship to my family and friends. Not only has his lying made me seem untrustworthy, but now neither of his parents want anything to do with me because of it.
It hurt my feelings a ton, but he's not understanding why. He ruined what could have been a good thing but now I just want to go home.
No. 430769
File: 1562378677025.gif (1.84 MB, 500x500, 1534412606114.gif)
Sorry in advance for the long post
>from shitty third world country, living abroad since I was 19 (am now in mid-20s), consider new country my home, home country is unlivable
>Stayed long enough to technically qualify for citizenship, passed language test etc, but they always give me short term visas and you can't apply without already having a long-term visa (family or stable work)
>need one document to renew visa this month, long wait because it's a court process, need family member to request it in my home country
>this time it will be a long-term one and I'll finally be considered an equal and able to work full time, get healthcare and qualify for citizenship
>my mom completely fucks it up and now I have to wait even longer
>might not get new visa on time before this one expires because mom fucked up everything and has to be babysat for everything technology related
>if visa expires I'll have to wait 4 to 7 more years to qualify because I would be in the country illegally for a short time
But wait, there's more
>Need money to pay for visa fees
>Invoicing issues delayed my salary
>Have less than 10€ on my bank account because bf works at a startup that can't secure funding and hasn't been paid for 4 months, I had to use the last of my money on rent (because his boss promised he'll be paid "maybe next week" for some weeks now) and he promised me we'll be fine and he'll pay me back
>used up all of my savings (for doctors, rent, small fund for a japan trip I've been wanting to visit for 11 years) on bills and rent for the both of us because he supported me in the past
>We both eat only once or twice a day and go to bed hungry so we can sleep it off
>My job is very physical so I'm very slow and tired because I have no time to eat in the morning and I'm always hungry
>Do a poor job and have started getting bad reviews, which can lead to getting fired, plus I'm very slow and clumsy by nature so I know I'll never be really good at what I do but I have no choice but to do it
But wait, there's more
>have no experience in my field because I've been stuck cleaning, cooking, wiping asses etc for years to support myself
>applying for jobs since January and have not once been even called back while all my friends and classmates get decent to good jobs, my CV is all over the place because I have creative hobbies and projects but studied physics, and little experience
>Everyone's saying "why don't you have a good job lined up yet, you were the smartest girl in class" as if I want to clean, cook and wipe asses all my life
>My teeth hurt a lot but I can't afford to get them fixed so I have to take paracetamols on an empty stomach
Someone stop this Kafka ass shit right now.
No. 430771
>>430763His family sounds shitty. They obviously believe anything he does. I would never automatically dislike my son's gf.
Save money to get your own place some day if need be.
No. 430830
>>430826god, i feel you so hard anon. it's like, no matter how much you reach out or what kind of attempts you make to either keep friendships or make new ones, it's all fruitless and leaves you at the place you started: alone.
sage for not adding any real contribution or advice, i just came here to vent about the same thing and saw what you posted.
No. 430842
>>430524Thanks, but I'm not american. We do have a lot of rescue group here but breed specific rescue groups are unheard of.
>>430572Thanks ! That's what I tell myself to, I was very shocked when my uncle adopted a purebred dog and he ended up blind after developing glaucoma in both eyes and almost died due to kidney failure in the first three years of his life.
>>430711Definitely!
No. 430844
>>430769That shit all absolutely blows anon. I am truly sorry. Simply reading all that, I started clutching my head in anxiety.
I wish I could throw a couple hundred bucks at you
No. 430889
File: 1562411274090.jpg (69.03 KB, 768x576, D5BDDcTXoAAXHjj.jpg)
My mood has been all over the place.
One moment I'm running around, dancing and laughing. The next I'm just feeling like shit and laying in bed all day wanting to just cry. why is this happening to me. I wish it would stop.
No. 430960
>>430951This is incredibly bizarre, with some differences this is incredibly similar to a situation I was in once (LDR, new country, learning new language, living with parents who have a weird relationship, and sociopath druggie brother)
Idk where you are in your relationship with your bf anon, but time, securing our work lives, and moving into our own place helped. I get that it’s stressful to be in the middle of someone else’s shit (especially when you already have your own), but unless you can make yourself independent you’ll be trapped. Ask yourself if it’s viable for you to make yourself independent in the country you’re already in, or if it makes more sense to go back to your home country and prepare there. Be honest with yourself and don’t let idea of “being wrong” about your previous decisions stop you.
It’s your life and your sanity. Don’t let someone’s (i.e. your family’s) opinion about the choices you’ve made for yourself stop you.
No. 430988
>>430972I think you're right but it's more about issues in general. Absentee parenting, abuse, trauma, etc. Women and girls are always expected to cope quietly, lest we be called attention seekers, while men and boys are coddled and called brave for opening up about it.
It makes me extremely pissed off.
No. 430990
>>430972I see this a lot and if you look at (incel)sites like Reddit you see a lot of men blaming their failures in life on the fact that they had no male role models and didn't get to learn how to be a ~real man~ and they get so much sympathy, as if they were tortured by their mothers or something.
But of course the struggle of the mothers and the sisters aren't even discussed cause who cares right?
No. 431008
>>430990blogpost: I grew up with a father figure, but one who is mentally ill and whose issues showed up in my teens. My father had a horrible childhood and people excuse that a lot, but it feels like no one like those incels would excuse mine or my paternal aunt's even if I told them some of the horror stories I've gone through and would just blame "daddy issues" because I was older when they happened or because it "wasn't that bad" which I'm not saying is wrong, my dad definitely had it worse, but it matters. Like oh lol you have daddy issues, that's why you dated an older man, not that I was a mildly naive shit who tried to judge based on character and managed to land a manchild, or that maybe it's fucked up for that man to have reeled me in instead of rejecting me. We have a complicated relationship because I ended up feeling like my brothers' father figure due to some of the situations, and people tell me I didn't need to be or I'm not, but what am I supposed to do? Just let my mom handle everything? My aunt did all of the "daddy issue" shit like having babies, hard drugs, being a prostitute, and it's just sad, no one in my family would ever mock it like that, but I'm sure there are people who would mock her but praise my dad because my dad made it mostly out of the cycle at least externally, his issues are just what we see and stem directly from maternal abuse and abuse from father figures and not having his father in the picture.
I don't have it nearly as bad as a lot of fatherless people or people with really
abusive fathers, but the cycle of abuse trickles down and makes broken people if they don't become horrid abusers themselves. It's fucking sad, not something to mock in girls who try to come out about it. Do they really believe not having a good father figure is a tragedy for men but pornographic and just whiny for women? It's a fucking tragedy regardless.
No. 431014
>>431008sorry sage for doubleposting/samefagging, IATA: I forgot to mention, the mother in his case was
abusive and kept being abused by subsequent fathers of her children, boyfriends, etc and she wanted men like her father, who I think was gone a lot in the military, she was chasing after him through men my parents think. The father of her child/children left her for her close friend, leaving her with the kids..how isn't that heartbreaking? How is that just daddy issues? Fuck those men, let them live the life of someone who has had someone's child and ended up repeatedly abandoned and abused. I'd love to see them live with a uterus and have to carry babies to term only to have the father leave them and beat them, maybe then they'd fucking understand. How can women who have never had children get it, but they can't?
No. 431024
File: 1562433366631.jpg (74.19 KB, 720x706, IMG_1341.JPG)
>>431008I'm the anon you replied to and I'm really sorry that you had to go through all of that. I was dealing with a lot of emotional abuse too and you just tend to carry that shit with you alone and it takes you almost your entire life trying to get past that but I truly hope you're in a better place now- physically and mentally.
No. 431027
File: 1562434003469.jpg (57.8 KB, 500x625, 101722.jpg)
I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel empty and bored of people and I feel like it's a lot of trouble keeping up with them and don't really care about getting to know new people. If I didn't have sexual urges a lot, I'd think I was schizoid.
It probably has to do with how I've grown up. I never had a family since I was born, it's just been me and my mom and my mom neglected me and when she didn't, I was the victim of her anger and stress. I didn't have any friends growing up except for one really good one online that lived across the country. Loved her the most, took her for granted and lost her. Miss her everyday and feel like I'll never bond with anyone like I did with her again. I was harshly bullied at school and when I came home, it was the same thing. I always thought I wanted a boyfriend, I got one, got another one, they didn't make me feel anything special either.
I don't know if it's because I'm not meeting the right people or what.
I sincerely wish I could feel connected to others.
No. 431131
>>431100That sounds especially annoying and gave me a bit of anxiety while reading it. I'm very sorry anon.
It makes me thankful that my parent's lived in LA while Richard Ramirez was at large lol
No. 431174
>>431173*Picky eater
Annoying
Fat also
No. 431188
>>431173…Dump his ass, anon. I know that's the stock answer here but it is also usually the correct one.
>tranny porn>tiny dick>everything elseSeriously.
No. 431222
>>429568My bunny just passed away only about 2 weeks after I got her. I took great care of her, gave her proper food, hay, and water, she still died. It was my dumbass fault for buying her from a shitty pet store when I know damn well they all get their bunnies from breeders. Not sure if this is the right thread for this but I needed to get it off my chest.
Anyway RIP Mia.
No. 431243
>>431173Fuck… why are you with him in the first place?
>>431222Rip Mia, she is in a better place now
No. 431247
File: 1562483628286.jpg (58.75 KB, 460x613, awQR3DD_460s.jpg)
My whole family is mental but this one in particular is the worst.
>Snowflake
>Always in the victim mentality
>Married 3 times
>Threw her kids from previous marriage on her parents who are old
>Married to a younger man with 7 years age gap
>Wants more kids from her current husband to fix her failing marriage
>Damaged body image
>No sense of self
>Had work done
>Thinks she is one of those Instathots
>cOnEnT CrEaToR
>Aggressive 98% of the time
>Teases people all the time
>When someone fights back she does what she is good at: playing the victim
>Can't take care of animals despite always bringing them to die in her flat
>Has a depressed cat who is fur on a skeleton
>Zero responsibility
>Refuses to do therapy or get any form of help
>But SHE is the victim and will fight you if you say otherwise
No. 431253
File: 1562487056777.jpg (518.77 KB, 1242x1225, ba7c2819-eeac-4ef8-b414-74d80f…)
I want to desperately leave my NEETdom. Been shut in for 5 years and I have a very big fear of men. Last time I went outside which was in November 2018, I caught a man smiling at me and the second I got home I threw up from fear/anxiety. I want to be normal so badly, but I don't know how to help myself.
No. 431279
>>431247Wow what a cow!
>>431253Oh anon, I'm sorry you are stuck. Find a female therapist that you can visit maybe. Just avert your eyes and wear a baseball cap to the appointment. Or ask a woman to drive you. Eventually she will help you learn ways of coping with the anxiety you feel.
Please don't let men keep you from living and experiencing the world.
No. 431311
>>431301You should go away for your birthday.
If your boyfriend won't go with you, go somewhere to visit a friend for a couple of days. Reclaim your birthday.
No. 431323
>>431312Cantonese. I'm learning Mandarin but I don't know enough to understand their conversations, and they don't know enough English to talk to me much.
>>431305>>431311>>431319Thanks anons, I was a bit worried I was being selfish. I'll ask my boyfriend if we could spend just his mom's birthday with them instead of the whole week-end, and go on a date the next day. All I want is to spend some quality time with him on my birthday.
No. 431328
File: 1562514002320.gif (911.09 KB, 320x180, sfhbdshfhdhjhfjhsd.gif)
One meal a day is super easy to do EXCEPT on weekends when I'm home and food is readily available, plus having the time to go out and there's literal food places across the street. The temptation is always around. It's not even that I have much in the way of snacks, my hungry ass just wants to get up and cook a full meal.
I've already had canned kippers and two slices of bacon. I was hoping the protein in me would stave the hunger. That was three hours ago and I could already eat again. It's not even noon.
The weekend has been exceptionally long due to the holiday and I'm actually alright with going back to work tomorrow.
At least when I'm at work I sip black coffee and tell myself the food there is shitty and also expensive for what someone gets. Of course there's work to do so my mind is occupied on anything other than food.
I guess it wouldn't be a bad idea to go to the gym today but I hate struggling so much.
>mfw compulsively looking at shit online that I can't afford to take my mind off it
No. 431330
File: 1562514991683.gif (569.37 KB, 500x480, mirai.gif)
I moved to a new place and I'm trying to decorate my room based on some old stuff I had plus some newer things. Everything seems like a hodge podge of shit at worst and vaguely related at best. I wish I had a more cohesive theme, but the problem is I'm so attached to the stuff I have that I don't want to get rid of anything and to replace anything with something new costs money that I don't have.
Weebshit in one corner, girly antiques and witchy shit in the other, pastel rainbow crap, cheap Target chic, pet tank; and it's all tied together with that generic apartment complex beige-faintly-yellow walls that I'm not allowed to paint over and the god awful carpeting.
Absolutely terrible.
No. 431331
>>431328One meal a day just sounds like you're fucking up your body though, I can't think why you would do that?
Snack on vegetables, keep busy, drink water, move your big meal to lunch and instead have fruit or yogurt for breakfast
No. 431342
>>431338Brainless desk job where interact with people and do chart entries. It's not stressful.
>>431331I've had a lot of weight loss success with it. I take vitamin supplements in case I don't always have a good day but
>>431334 is right. Someone mentioned omad on here awhile ago so I went to a subreddit to learn more about it. tl;dr there's no such thing as starvation mode and unless one dangerously undereats there aren't issues.
I was the type of person who'd take advice like yours and run away with it. Like I'd eat the yogurt breakfast, veggie snacks, fruit, drink plenty of water, yet still want to binge at the end of the day. This diet works for me because it gives me a stricter structure and a goal to focus on.
Typical day is vitamin supplements before work with water, a couple cups of black dark roast coffee at work, more water, and then 1200 calories to work with at dinnertime. If I
have to cheat like what happened today, I do all protein and low carb.
No. 431361
>>431353I'm laughing because that anon thinks
cheap produce are going to be the only result of cheap labor.
What she ought to be concerned about is the flux of educated, desperate people fleeing their home countries who don't mind working under what we would consider terrible conditions in fields that aren't just agriculture and manual labor for sub $15/hr.
No. 431366
File: 1562520737982.jpg (36.54 KB, 500x366, 1431950083784.jpg)
I turned 24 a few days ago and I'm so frustrated and embarrassed that I have nothing to show for it.
No college education, good job or my own place. The only thing I kind of have going for myself is a nice body that I worked hard for.
Having no money fucking sucks.
No. 431385
File: 1562529572940.jpg (97.71 KB, 678x760, tumblr_ouocowvFIG1rp1x6so1_128…)
hey all, it's
>>430185 anon again with a small update: i haven't reached out to that now-ex-best friend since that text exchange i mentioned, nor have i heard from her. i will dip into even more blogging territory for this post to vent some more.
our friendship actually began when we were freshmen in high school – she was deeply immersed in her anorexia and after i'd confessed to her that i was struggling with eating disordered habits as well, that's mainly when we hit it off. not to mention me having dated her older brother the year prior and him having told me she was anorexic over summer break. i've always been naturally thin (extremely premie baby) and she ended up telling me i was who she'd wanted to look like when she began her "diet" the year before.
my relapses into my ed have always been tied to her since i'd learned that she idolized me, but our positions would be flipped. whenever she was doing poorly, i would be almost at a healthy weight and vice versa. it's like we'd
trigger each other.
after we graduated high school and i knew i wouldn't see her every day anymore (she goes to school out of state) i had the hardest relapse i'd ever experienced. she came down to see me that christmas and kept on about my kidneys failing if i kept going; i ignored her and continued on until she cut me off. i only recovered for her.
i've been what i'd consider "recovered" for the past year or so until the shit that happened with her the other day. this is why i say my relapses are tied to her – she abandons me and i immediately revert back to behaviors, worrying my partner who is now the only reason for me not to completely give up.
i'm beginning to realize that i always base my reasons to recover entirely on others and the fear of them abandoning me if i don't change, and never do it just for my own sake. i should talk to my therapist about it next session but i guess i just wanted to know if any other anons have ever been in a similar boat or had advice. i know now that my friendship with that particular woman was never healthy to begin with and i'm probably truly better off, but it still aches.
No. 431388
>>431383Well I had the same thoughts and told him similar thing (although in a nicer way), he got even more butthurt.
Bleh.
No. 431408
>>431400I don't know why he would straight up ignore something like that. Sounds like
>>431399 is right. What does your bf do?
No. 431415
>>431377i've experienced this EXACT reaction to voicing displeasure at the way a conversation went with my bf. i think it's a defense mechanism for them to start calling you irrational because they can't handle being accused of carelessness. everyone is careless sometimes and steps on toes etc etc. it's difficult to resist letting them blow the argument up to be all about their feelings.
and they say women are too emotional lmao as if.
No. 431436
File: 1562540229288.jpeg (85.74 KB, 701x722, 1559031053289.jpeg)
I like diffusing essential oils because I like the smell. It drives me bonkers when I'm trying to find oils and the label says stupid shit like "Nighttime Blend" and "Relax" wtf no, just tell me what bullshit's in it. I feel like it's a sneaky way for manufacturers to add synthetic and cheap perfumey stuff.
No. 431455
>>431449it seems like its just water weight, anon
dont worry too much about it
No. 431473
>>431463its good to have a goal weight anon, but fluctuation is normal and inevitable, especially depending on what you're eating, how often you're eating, how much water you're drinking and at what point in your menstural cycle you're at. even if you reach your goal weight, you're still going to fluctuate a bit day to day and thats fine. like
>>431471 said focus on how your clothes fit, your measurements and how you look visually.
No. 431497
>>431481is the problem that he's more in love with you or is the problem that he's obsessed with east asia? because it seems like the latter to me, and i can understand why that's a problem for you. why is it that all guys are that guy, gymbros, or elitist music/art assholes that are really emotionally
abusive? there are only 3 guys
No. 431532
File: 1562568907131.png (476.16 KB, 499x371, butteredsoles.png)
>>431027similar situation…very isolated childhood with neglectful parent, never shown affection in any form, other kids were freaked out by me, never learned to properly socialize.
moved in with my other parent at 15 who ended up being a womanchild who let me do what i want and so i just did drugs and hung out with loser drug nihilists and ruined my chance at a better future (i was a straight A student before this but fam is dirt poor and i dun goofed by not focusing on school more) my first experiences of socializing were with these dysfunctional pill popping hillbilly punks and that didn't set me up for social success.
decided not to die in the deep south with lortabs in my gut so i crawled north and went to art school (kek), didn't make a single friend. realized years later it was probably because i unconsciously alienated myself from others from the get-go and only other disordered people could put up with that. in retrospect all my occasional female friendships were
toxic.
i genuinely want to connect and with age i get better at talking to people/pretending to be normal and not a feral unsocialized tard like i truly am deep down, but the reality i dwell on at the end of every night is…i fucking hate these people. even if i do want friends, everyone my age is unbearable to be around. esp in the art hoe crowds.
had a hot bf who understood me but he went crazy from untreated schizophrenia and i couldn't deal with his retardation on top of my own so now i'm alone again lol. i think it really says something about me that the only person who could see me for who i am is batshit insane and the only people i draw in are weirdos. it also says something about me that i have no friends my age to vent this to and finally succumbed to blurting my ruminations out on a lolcowfarm vent thread after lurking /snow/ for a year and maybe posting 2 things ever.
maybe every single person on earth is crazy not just me and all the people i know and i shouldn't beat myself up so hard over it.
No. 431562
File: 1562580154644.jpg (94.87 KB, 1125x1110, 4agel594vx231.jpg)
>>429568I have problems with feeling neglected most of the time, if someone doesn't give me their 100% at any given situation I would feel hurt and sad for days ahead, I even lose my sleep at times.
I'm in a constant fear of losing people/people turning on me, I feel like I'm certain that I'm going to lose everyone eventually so I'm always on my toes when any minor thing happens (at some point I was fixing my makeup in the mirror and saw the in the reflection my friends at the time whispering and I felt in my guts it was about me and I was never the same with them again), I just crave constant attention and love and that is extremely unrealistic since everyone has their own shit going on too. I feel this way even with the closest people to me, and I sometimes push people away to the point they finally leave and I would feel happy that I "discovered" their true colours but surely I would feel regret later, this is complicated and I need to believe in myself again, I need to realise that I'm not as foul as I believe myself to be and people don't necessarily hate me if they didn't laugh at my jokes… I don't know how to do that though.
No. 431626
File: 1562594791414.jpg (15.47 KB, 300x250, gratataat.jpg)
being mixed race and looking racially ambiguous is so tiresome. i'm west african and north european, but look southeast asian. i don't identify with a racial group as people judge you based on what you look like, and don't feel like i "fit in" anywhere. people (mainly ~woke~ ppl on tumblr) constantly talk about mixed people having some sort of privilege, which might be the case, but our negative experiences tend to get ignored. in lots of cases, mixed people don't get fully "accepted" and end up feeling ostracized. the fetishization of mixed kids doesn't help either.
i'm not trying to make it seem like i am a victim, i just get upset sometimes as people constantly ask about my ethnicity or ask if i'm adopted when they see me with my family. i'm also tired of random guys w yellow fever on social media liking me because they think i am asian/part asian or because i look "exotic" lol. at least i can relate to meghan markle on some level i guess.
No. 431722
>>431694Anon is exaggerating but the USA does have a very skewed perception of race. They mostly care about a black vs white narrative, only care about Hispanics once in a while, and SJWs particularly have a weird vision of Asian Americans where they're basically second class white people who must atone for the sin of being the most successful immigrant group. They like big, broad categories that they can simplify to the max, and anyone who doesn't neatly fall in a category is going to face a lot of bullshit.
In Europe we have a bit more understanding of smaller categories like specific ethnicities, especially in countries that used to have colonies and have some specific historical groups resulting from that. I do think Western Europe is shifting to a more dumbed down, caricatural vision of race because of American influence though. A lot of people here stay updated on American politics yet know nothing about what's going in our country.
No. 431734
>>431692I’ll take “That’s bullshit” for $400, Alex
>>431722>”Europe has a much more mature understanding of race in comparison to those stupid Americans”I can smell the smugness from your post. America has a lot of issues with race, sure but to act like Europe doesn’t (and if it does, blaming it on American culture) is just ignorant on so many levels. They’re stuff you can do in Europe that you wouldn’t get away with that you can’t in the U.S in regards to race. And a lot of Europeans seem to have this elitist attitude towards anyone that has a different ethnicity than their nationality even if they were born and raised in the same European nation.
TL;DR: America has fucked to views on race but so does Europe
No. 431739
>>431734>>431722so basically
america: beginner level babby's first racism
europe: advanced level professional big boy racism
how come some people in the latter group are so proud of this?
No. 431741
>>431739>america: beginner level babby's first racismAhahahaha…ha
If only.
No. 431748
>>431722>In Europe we have a bit more understanding of smaller categories like specific ethnicities>especially in countries that used to have coloniesSince when? The French are so retarded that they don't even know the difference between Berbers/indigenous North Africans and Arabs even though they colonized Maghreb and Algeria was a French colony for over a century. France still has influence over there and in other ex-colonies, and there are a lot of North Africans in France but they still think that just because people speak a specific dialect of Arabic suddenly they're Arabs. I'm sure they also don't know shit about other African countries, and your average French adult will mostly just know about Québequois having a weird French accent. I could keep talking about it for days but European countries can be really racist, just in a different way than the USA. And in France at least they're insanely passive-aggressive and they will definitely make you doubt yourself if you're a
victim of very blatant and illegal racism because of it. Then again, French people as a whole are insanely passive aggressive, I've noticed that Americans and Canadians are way more direct when they want to say pretty much anything.
>A lot of people here stay updated on American politics yet know nothing about what's going in our country.You're right, but I have a feeling it's because online at least everyone is bombarded with news about the USA whether they like it or not.
No. 431817
File: 1562613438819.jpg (33.81 KB, 620x617, dyi7z.jpg)
>yall is better about
>i aint gonna
Is this aave…?
No. 431824
>>431814>the fact that she won’t break up with him gives him the right to be racist?
I mean, I agree that anon should stand up for herself more (at least judging by the post) but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior
No. 431839
>>431741Puhlease. Americans are so racist that the White guys rarely date out and if they do, they go for the lightest East Asians and nearly white passing Latinas. They dont even touch the Arab and Indian girls here because they tend to be brown more often than not, even if some of them are pretty white looking. The only time you see a white american guy with a Brown or Dark girl is if he divorced his white wife and got a import from SEA.
Meanwhile in Europe especially in places like France and Spain its not unusual to see white guys with dark skinned non white women or the children of those unions having white fathers whereas in the USA its always white mothers with dark skinned men
No. 431845
>>431833Good luck anon! I've suggested it several times to different anons here, but check out your school's clubs! You're bound to find something you like (knitting? cooking? international club? etc), and GI meetings are usually low commitment and super chill. See if your school has a club fair (they usually do!). Club members will usually be really nice because they always want new members, but don't be embarrassed if you don't want to return (it's expected). If not clubs, maybe something more active like a socially proactive group (not sure how to word it- my campus had a lot of volunteer/politically active groups that were sort of like clubs but a bit more of a commitment to a bigger cause than just a hobby/general interest). Maybe go on trips if your school organizes any (mine did to a big mall so we could pick up any supplies we needed, but a shopping trip is a great way to bond with people).
It's definitely a lot easier said than done, making friends is super difficult, but I believe in you anon! There are plenty of people out there who are just as nervous and scared like you. I went 2 hours away to college and living on campus was TERRIFYING at first, but once you settle in, it's an amazing experience! If you're living on campus on a dorm, maybe try to make friends with your dormmates! I would usually leave my door open and a girl popped on by on move in day to say hello and we actually became friends because she saw my wall decor (weeb shit lol) and started talking to me about it! See if there's even a facebook group for incoming freshmen that you can join and post on! That's honestly how I met my best friends who I stayed with all throughout college (we genuinely clicked! it wasn't just a survival thing haha- though nothing wrong with that! I have plenty of friends who I still keep on contact with and are nice people that I became friends with purely to survive classes/college at first).
Worst comes to worse, visit your professors during their office hours and befriend them! You might make friends with other visiting students, and if you don't, you've got faculty who you can rely on for future recommendations/someone to just talk to (I became pretty close with one of my professors/major advisors and he gave me so much life experience advice lol it really made me feel better).
I'm an awfully shy and introverted person but I miraculously came out with a couple of strong friendships and a lot of really vague (but still nice!) friendships with various people I met through the program I was admitted through, classes, other extra activities. Making friends is endless. Honestly, all you need is like one person and then hopefully your circle will expand through that person or you'll build up confidence to approach new people.
I hope you'll have a great time anon.
No. 431852
>>431839i really hope we're not measuring the egregiousness of racism by who white men want to fuck, anon, lmao.
that's some broke shit
No. 431979
File: 1562650860151.jpg (7.11 KB, 300x168, 2019-06-22-19-03-45--115508201…)
I fucking hate the summer time so much. Every day it's been 95-100+ degrees which wouldn't be so bad in it's own of it weren't for the humidity making the air feel like soup. There's literally no time of the day I can to out and relax or so any of the fun things that are portrayed as summertime activities without being drenched in sweat. Plus I feel so unproductive this time of year without school.
I just wanna wear sweaters and breathe again man.
No. 432081
>>432032No, I don't think a dog would have been all that attached to you within a year especially if it received interaction from your ex. If both of you were out of its life, maybe.
The dog is fine and is probably doing dog things.
No. 432197
>>432178>>432184>>432191you guys know there are different types of workouts that yield different results right?
>>432191this is because of overall fat loss. if you gain more fat in certain areas it's going to take longer to look less bulky and slim down.
anon should be trying to work out different areas to slim down first.
No. 432204
>>432197I'll try and get some exercise in. From what weight should I start lifting? I had some but they where the classic old lady weights lol should I start from there?
BTW has anyone experienced the same growth in their 20s almost as a second puberty? I had no ass or tights but they got bigger and fuller as I got older. After a big weight loss my lowest weight was 48kg but now I'm in the 55kg range and look ok I think. I couldn't keep up with the way I used to eat.
No. 432209
>>432197no, not until recently it wasn't really fat loss. it was just working muscles I never did before. i didn't diet, sometimes ate more due to the exercise, and still saw tangible results.
also, I never said I got slim, just that my shape got more attractive. I went from a sad flabby skinnyfat to a 'soft' kinda thicc body. it's the same, maybe even more fat, but it holds more attractively due to muscle underneath.
No. 432212
File: 1562700650757.png (3.22 MB, 1280x1707, 8.png)
TFW you're still struggling with your uni but trying to take care of people around you from the ages of 14 to 45 mental well-being…
I'm okay with the teens but lord the 25+ ones, why didn't those people deal with their trauma and insecurities yet?
No. 432215
>>431845>>431847Thank you so much for this sweetheart. I'm currently a bit anxious and was about to start crying since I'm looking at uni stuff right now (like the Welcome Week timetable - there's a lot of lectures and a social event that I'm already feeling shy about) and I'm just getting so scared. I really needed to read this. My mum's been super supportive too and says that we should just aim for me to try up until Christmas. If I really can't manage it, I can come out and it's fine - we'll try something else.
I'm unsure if there's orientation, I think there might've been but I've likely missed out now.
No. 432243
>>432215I'm hoping the best for you anon! It's okay if it doesn't work out. I knew some people who ended up leaving after the first semester, some things just don't work out. Just don't hole yourself up away from people! That's just asking for an isolated, miserable college experience. I really made it a point to talk to anyone who struck up a conversation with me (a lot easier to make friends if the really extroverted people approach you first lol). There are obviously weirdos to be wary of, but most people are nice! Maybe lowkey advertise your interests (like TV shows or games) via keychains on your bag/tshirt/etc or comment on someone's elses if you like the same thing. Easy way to open up a conversation and you'll be starting on common ground! Go to the social event even if you feel like it'll be awful. At the very least you'll have tried! I never made friends this way, but a lot of girls would compliment my outfit on some days and it's a nice feeling- I'm sure if you're stuck on line for something it's a good way to possibly open up a conversation. Up your social skills and step out of your comfort zone because the sooner you do it, the easier it'll be to make friends, and the easier it'll be to fake your way into being an adult in the real world (or at least for me it worked out that way).
The days before classes started were some of the worst for me, and honestly they might be for you too, but classes open up common ground for students (light chatter before class (introduce yourself!), invite someone to grab food at some point to study, organize a study group, etc). Don't get down if you don't make friends immediately. It might even be halfway into the semester before you make any meaningful friendships! If your course doesn't interest you, maybe take some other random classes that vaguely interest you until you find something that clicks. Maybe some intro art classes, I always feel like those are fun lol.
By the way, where are you located? I would check to see if there's still orientation! My uni didn't let us skip it because they had some pretty important (though very boring lol) info in there (or maybe that's all in your welcome week?).
guh my university has been posting stories on their insta about orientation and it all makes me feel so nostalgic for it lol. My first year was rocky (made good friends but had weird/shitty roommates) and pulling the memories loneliness I felt during the very beginning was something I honestly forgot about, and it got far outweighed by the years that followed. I hope you'll have an equally fulfilling experience anon. Those years were some of the best years of my life, truly!
No. 432377
>>431989I'm sorry anon :(
hugs you deserve so much better
No. 432395
File: 1562736449570.png (126.33 KB, 500x521, rember-wen-u-feel-scare-never-…)
i started EMDR therapy as a last-ditch effort to reduce the hold PTSD has over my life. i've only done one session so far, but had my first night terror that night and a shitton of traumas i forgot about are resurfacing. i know it's part of the healing process but goddamn, i literally forgot a decade of my childhood where i was repeatedly exploited and sexually abused by adults and other kids alike. i'm worried there's more and idk this post is pointless i'm just scared
No. 432443
>>432395You are a brave and strong person. You can make it through this. You will be able to help yourself in the way that you feel like you need. I wish you the best, and I hope it gets easier for you soon.
EMDR is one of the most effective therapies.
No. 432486
>>432445He ended up ghosting me yesterday so I'm not hopeful.
I'm not sure what I was hoping for, maybe that we'd really hit it off and somehow have a successful ldr lmao? He's posted about some interests that I'd enjoy talking about, so the looks aren't the
sole appeal.
His problems are mostly in that he's obsessively body dysmorphic and had a shitty childhood.
No. 432572
Please end the pain anons.
I have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 years. I am in my early twenties, he is in his late twenties. I chose him because he has some decent morals and values. He doesn't watch porn, he's not a selfish lover. Men like that are hard to come by. The only downside is that he's a bit of a fix-up project. Even though he is older than me, I have always been more successful and further in life despite me coming from a less privileged background. He's already come pretty far and has worked on himself a lot, he's even planning on going back to university.
Now the problem is that he doesn't like conflict, or thinking about difficult things. I get that, but now all hell has broken lose. With going back to uni there is bureaucracy to be dealt with, finding a new place, moving etc. I have been asking if he's alright for 6 months now, and he always says yeah I am fine. Then at the most inopportune moment, it comes out that he hasn't done anything towards it. He freaks out, he is afraid of change, and tries to break up but he cannot go through with it. Obviously after that I have been a bit shaken up, if someone tries to break up with me yeah I feel pretty unloved and unappreciated. He hasn't put much effort into mending the relationship. Meanwhile he also hasn't been taking care of his own responsibilities. My last few interactions with him the last few weeks mainly have been him moping and being depressed and calling himself a fat piece of shit and then not doing anything about it. It's not like he cannot change his situation, he used to be more active and take better care of himself.
Then today, he was playing video games online. He hadn't even eaten breakfast, he couldn't be bothered to take care of something he already missed the deadline for. And he wondered why I was pissed off that he decided to play video games before even eating anything, and it was already 2 pm. It's like I am the mother of a teenage son. He thinks I just don't want him to have fun with friends, while really I just want him to take care of himself and his responsibilities first. And now he flip flops between breaking up and not breaking up. If it wasn't so special for a man to not be a porn addicted perv, it would be an easy judgement. But he has enough special qualities that even make me consider to keep going.
Honestly I wish I was a lesbian. This shit feels so exhausting and hopeless, and looking around at all the other options there really just isn't much there.
No. 432577
>>432572a man in his late twenties who's so cripplingly paralyzed by the mere idea of change or difficult choices isn't entitled to take out his lack of responsibility and accountability on you, anon.
what the fuck is wrong with your bf? he's scared of change, you care about him so you try to encourage him to do better and ensure he gets his shit done, and because you're not babying him like i'm sure his parents and former gfs have done his whole life he holds a breakup over your head all the time?
unless he gets his fat piece of shit ass into a therapists' office and actually holds himself accountable for his anxiety and inability to perform, then you're wasting time, energy and likely your money by staying in that relationship. seriously, who the fuck strings their partner along with "oooh i wanna break up with you…but also i don't…maybe…" because you're demanding he put on his big boy panties and get his shit together?
you said it yourself: you're his mommy he can stick his dick into. either you put your foot down and demand he goes to therapy and gets his act together or you stop covering his manbaby ass and leave.
No. 432579
>>432572This is rough, anon. I'm usually the person that says "dump him sis" but what you said about him not being a porn addict is kind of huge. The bar for men is truly so low lmao. You could try going on a break to take time for yourselves and come back to the relationship when you're both in a good place to start giving again rather than collapsing in on yourselves? Well, sounds like it's more
him than you that needs the break but it sometimes helps the other person if you pretend you relate to their problems. There's a certain support angle to doing the same kinda self work, like dieting together or working out together.
Anyway, he's gonna need therapy if he wants to pick up the necessary skills to overcome his own shit. Without therapy is extremely hard and taxing on both his loved ones and himself to navigate his issues on his own.
No. 432584
>>432574tbh that sounds very creepy and like there's some motive behind it. why the fuck wouldn't you just call your child your child, son or daughter? what was wrong with those terms?
it doesn't help that "lo" is reminiscent of the intro of the book "lolita"
>"She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita." No. 432633
File: 1562788636359.png (657.34 KB, 800x1100, 1520555813431.png)
i literally am unable to eat food at this point, i get beyond nauseous and sick if i eat more than 2 bites of something, drinks upset my stomach too
i'm eating like 300-400 calories a day and dropping weight like mad
this morning my mother told me i looked anorexic and that just fuels my ED behaviors
i'm not trying to lose weight, i just can't eat because my body rejects it and i have no appetite at all, but hearing that makes me want to lose even more weight
fuck
No. 432635
File: 1562788897886.jpg (53.92 KB, 640x1035, 12240533028c43d554d904f9682d97…)
>>432602>Oh. I guess I'm having a day where I have no idea what my face looks like and want to rip it off.Are you okay?
No. 432657
>>432643If you live in the US oral surgery isn't even covered by health insurance, you would need separate dental insurance. & You have to have it for several months before you're even allowed to use it for stuff.
Recovery would be around 2-4 days tops. You swell the most around day 3 then you're fine. Many oral surgeons will give you a 10-20% discount if you're paying out-of-pocket. It will cost less if it's just the one tooth and if you have it extracted using just local anesthetic instead of general anesthesia. General anesthesia is hundreds of dollars more and will make your recovery take longer.
No. 432662
>>432657God what the fuck. My parents dental plan was pretty great but I got kicked off because I made too much from my job (I didn't). My dental plan through my workplace covered 50% of the costs after I made the $2k deductible, but when I called up an oral surgeon close to my primary dentist to find out about out of pocket costs, she said it would roughly be $600 per tooth with local anesthesia. Like what the fuck lol. I left that job though, so whatever, fuck their insurance.
I figured I might as well get both of my impacted wisdom teeth out (I think they said they'll knock off a bit of $$ or some shit if I do that, plus I just don't want to deal with it if it acts up in the future). General anesthesia is an extra $650 and I don't want to pay it but god I'm such a little bitch even when it comes to getting my cavities filled. I've had my mouth numbed before to extract all of my back baby teeth (they weren't falling out on their own) and it didn't hurt but one tooth had a particularly deep root and I felt it despite the anesthesia and I have a fear that I'll feel them extracting my wisdom teeth despite local anesthesia ugh
No. 432670
File: 1562792794082.jpg (1.85 MB, 2904x3528, orWQgiq.jpg)
>>432662Here anon, this is what I paid for 1 severely impacted bottom tooth to be surgically removed and 2 normal wisdom teeth on the top to pulled. All out of pocked with no dental insurance and only local anesthetic (which was ez pz). I already had x-rays from my primary dentist so you can get those transferred over. Otherwise they will need to take xrays for about $150. There was also an initial consultation fee of $120 just to look at my mouth before the surgery day. I got the antibiotics free of charge from my local grocery store chain and the pain pills were $8.
I hope this helps you plan your finances a little bit and good luck.
No. 432673
>>432670Thank you anon! Thankfully my old dentist is in the same building as the oral surgeon I was looking into so I can get x-rays transferred over easy, but I think they said they would knock off whatever x-ray/consultation fee from the overall surgery fee if I decided to go through with it.
Did you really not feel anything from the local anesthesia? How was dealing with the needles poking into your mouth (another thing I remember hating so much from the time I got my back teeth pulled)? I also read about some people hearing their tooth being broken up for more easy extraction, did you hear/deal with that? Sorry for all the questions! I'm so freaked out about dealing with it all.
Also, a really weird question: what if you have to sneeze and you're only doing local anesthesia?!
No. 432679
>>432673It genuinely did not hurt at all, aside from the initial needles which you're already familiar with (a deep uncomfortable pinch). Also sometimes they have to wedge out a stubborn tooth/piece so they place pressure on your face/cheeks/jawline. But zero pain from the teeth being removed. I've had more painful cavity fillings tbh.
They do several rounds of injections to make absolutely sure you're all numbed up. So when you first go in you gargle some sanitizing mouthwash and the nurse gets you all comfy in the chair. Checks your blood pressure and gets all the instruments in order. Make sure you ask for a blanket or bring your own small throw because the local anesthetic makes you tremble. Then the doctor comes in. You get the easy first round of injections in your gums and they give you 15 minutes for it to numb everything. Then they come back again and give you more serious injections in your palate if you're having top teeth removed. This is also a test for them to make sure all of your nerves are absolutely numb or they'll give you more, and wait again. Repeat.
They are professionals. My doctor did upwards of 3 surgeries an hour, all day only surgeries. Took 5 minutes for each normal tooth and about 10 minutes for my severely impacted one. All you hear is the drill cutting the tooth in pieces. No doctor worth their degree would ever perform surgery until they are absolutely sure you are anesthetized fully.
If you're worried about the sounds, bring some headphones and something to listen to music on. It'll calm you if you're nervous as well.
No. 432705
>>432695getcoldturkey.com
I find turning off my internet for an hour as a good way to concentrate. You could also try a dopamine detox
No. 432711
>>432706That's fantastic anon, I'm proud of you! Dental fears are very common to have- the mouth is a very intimate area.
I have generalized anxiety but don't mind medical settings myself. What helped me a ton was becoming familiar with the dental profession, watching youtube videos about the procedure I was having done, etc. Demystifying the unknown removes it's power a bit.
We all know ~Le Reddit is a cancerous place but their /r/Dentistry subreddit is quite useful and informative on a good day if you have any questions.
Good luck! You got this!
No. 432754
my boyfriend broke up with me a few days ago, don't even know where to start and I'm very sorry for how long this is but I'm just really upset.
we were only together a few months total. started having problems about a month/month and a half ago. I found out he liked porn of lolis. I was really disturbed and upset. he first told me that he had to look up hentai of lolis to see small tits and ass because all of the non-loli women in hentai had large tits and ass (I have large tits and ass just fiy). Later he confessed that he actually liked lolis because of the height difference, and how he thought it would be really fun to fuck someone significantly shorter than him, and that it was part of a "protector" fantasy (he said being shorter supposedly means weaker and that's where the protective part comes in). this hurt my feelings because I'm 5'9" and have always deeply hated my height and desperately wanted to be shorter. and every time I expressed disgust for loli porn he would whine that I was making him feel bad/making him insecure. he had a waifu pillow and tons of posters of anime chicks on his wall and 70% of the time when he opens his phone he's looking at erotic images anime chicks. one time he was scrolling through the downloaded images on his phone and there were literally hundreds of erotic/borderline pornographic pictures of anime girls, a lot of them were "monster girls" and lolis (also, this was right after I gave him a blowjob).
he saw nothing wrong with talking about things he thought were attractive that I didn't have right in front of me, I told him it bothered me and acted like I was fucking crazy for being bothered by it. in his words "I wouldn't expect one person to check all the boxes" which like, yeah, true, there are features that I like that he didn't have- the difference is that I didn't need to look up porn and erotic images day-in-day-out of those things to satisfy a desire. again, don't care that he liked those things, it was that he had to constantly seek them out that bothered me. also he watched porn 2-3 times a day every day and I just… began to feel like I could never satisfy him.
we're both overweight amerifags and had talked about dieting together. he made several comments over the course of our relationship of how I would be more attractive if I lost weight (which didn't bother me because the same was true for him). when I would bring up that his constant looking at porn etc bothered me he would say I shouldn't be bothered by it because "that's not what matters in a relationship" (I'm guessing he means sexual attraction) and "you think you're just something pretty to me and you're more than that". however, I felt like becoming more attractive for him was pointless because he has to get so much of his sexual satisfaction and porn that why would he need any from me? if sexual attractiveness and "being something pretty" isn't what was important in a relationship then why was it important for me to lose weight? I asked him and he was like "I want to look more attractive for my partner, I hope they would want to look more attractive for me". and I was like, I do, but it feels pointless because you have to look at porn so much and you keep saying that it's not what's important in a relationship. and then he said "well it's about self improvement and I value self improvement". so I was like, okay, it's JUST about self improvement? and he said no. and it was this circular argument that felt like he was purposely misunderstanding my questions. I'm pretty sure he just wanted me to be as attractive as possible and still consume tons of anime porn (in other words have his cake and eat it too).
also we had almost nothing in common, which is something I knew and brought up BEFORE WE EVEN GOT IN A RELATIONSHIP because I was concerned about it and he always dismissed it completely. but then when he broke up with me he said he realized that having things in common is really important to him which fucking infuriated me. I don't like drinking which is like the #1 thing he does with his friends. I don't like anime or marvel either which is mostly what they talk about. also they always talk about the highschool they went to which is how they all know each other. I have a hard time socializing with more than 1 or 2 people and he wanted to me to be more social with them. also when I mentioned that his constant gawking at erotic images/porn bothered me he said something like "well and ideal partner would accept you completely". yet he was always trying to get me to socialize with his friends more? why couldn't he accept me for not wanting to be social?
when it came time for his days off he would pretty much always choose to be with his friends and not me. he said he didn't want to put his social life on hold for me- not the exact way he said it but he did say he "didnt want to put his social life on hold" and that he "couldn't combine the two" (me and his friends) and that he didn't have enough time to make time for us separately. so basically he chose his friends over me. he said he broke up with me because he felt like he was making me miserable (which he was a bit) but I think he also knows he could have easily made me less miserable by choosing to spend time with me a lone a bit each week and not look at erotic images in front of me but he didn't want to do either of those things. which like, fair play, I know I should be glad he broke up with me but I'm just thnking about how happy I was when we were first together and it's making me really depressed. we're supposedly "friends" now but he hasn't texted me so much as once. and oh man there's SO MUCH MORE I could rant about but this post is already too long.
so basically he chose his friends and 2D women over me which hurts my feelings. he's probably off watching hentai of lolis, and cuddling with his waifu pillow. I'm sure they're better than me in every way, and can make him happier than I ever could have.
No. 432757
>>432754Count yourself lucky that you doged a bullet. He sounds like a miserable human being. Real men don't favor anime porn of little girls over a real woman.
He sounds like trash.
No. 432759
>>432754Lowkey dude sounds like an evil pedo ngl this is textbook manipulation.
~Addendum to add that I know you feel vulnerable and worthless and lonely as fuck right now anon. Suffer through it and leave him as a part of your scary past you can warn your kids/nieces/god children of one day.
Focus on yourself, lose excess body weight through hobbies where you'll meet other people like yourself and regain your self esteem. Running/Jogging/Bouldering/Climbing/Yoga/Weightlifting/Etc. Stay safe, love u.
No. 432806
>>432766Yes it is pathetic, but 1) we were friends for about 2 years before we got together and he always seemed like a wonderful person, and 2) I have poor mental health and get super attached to people easily and have a hard time getting over them, I'm seeing a therapist right now but it hasnt helped much.
>>432759Thank you. It means a lot to me.
>>432760I never asked for your sympathy, I was just venting because I feel depressed about it. Coming to terms with the fact that he's not who I thought he was.
No. 432875
>>432806Tbh youre shit for staying with some wannabe child molester. You sound very young. I can't imagine an adult woman dating some weeb chomo and falling so much in 3 months.
Please grow up and make better choices.
No. 432910
legit i hate people that are the type to go to conventions or any alt people at all, actually. they're always people who have money/come from some money, but are tragically tasteless, like, they will spend $400 on bodyline tier garbage (not that actual nip shit is any better; lolita everything is so tryhard whimsical and/or tryhard elegant and no one with any sense thinks it doesn't look hot topic tier, i don't care how what stupid prefecture it came from or if it was handwoven by walking, talking japanese field mice, it's always low quality and poorly designed) or 'nerd'/'geek' garbage, and despite having money, they are the literal walking personification of wood panelling. i hate that these people have money. some of you guys are like this and you need to stop, it's really embarrassing. i can't escape these people
No. 432950
>>432874Agreeing with
>>432943, also keep in mind thah you thinking you're "acting" like you're depressive is a very common symptom - look up "impostor syndrome". I'm in treatment for years, diagnosed and everything, and even I sometimes think "I'm just acting up. There's nothing wrong with me, I'm just lazy".
No. 432952
>>432944As I've gotten older I learned to immediately remove a guy as a dating prospect if he has a female best friend or describes a woman as being "like a sister." It's all a big delusional front. They would drop everything if the girl wants to be with him, full stop. I don't argue or express my feelings on it any more, I just dump them from my life because otherwise I would basically be the other woman.
I'm sorry for being so bleak, but it might not be worth it.
No. 432967
File: 1562862071670.gif (256.8 KB, 600x338, 1559311963418.gif)
I feel weird about my sexual orientation. I love women. I hate men. That would make me a lesbian, sure. But.
I don't experience sexual attraction. At all. I can see a person and say "well, they're pleasing to the eye", but I never want to fuck people. I am completely fine not having sex ever. I rarely masturbate and when I do, I don't fantasize or think of other people or sexual organs/acts, the closest I can compare it to is giving myself a shot. It's almost clinical, detached. Not exactly sexual gratification, more like a button you can push so the brain releases happy chemicals.
Tumblr logic about romantic and sexual attraction being different things makes sense to me really, but calling myself "asexual lesromantic" fucking blows? Also I am pretty sure that's not really actually a scientifically proven thing so it makes me sound like a snowflake AND an idiot.
I love women. I would love to kiss women, hold hands, go on dates and all that. I would love one day to live with a woman and marry her, maybe even have kids together. I would have sex with a woman if I was in a relationship with her and she wanted me to. But I won't feel sexually attracted. And it makes me feel like a failure of a lesbian. Because being a lesbian is literally "being a woman who's sexually attracted to other women".
And because I don't feel sexual attraction I was completely fine having sexual experiences with a man too when I was a teen who didn't know that men are cancer and poison. I really don't like most of the "heterosexual" sex acts though, but I am not exactly repulsed by the sight of a dick and all. Men can be aesthetically pleasing to me just as women are.
Just… ugh. I shouldn't question myself, I'm 24 for fucks sake.
And how do I even go about dating people? Tell them outright "I like you, but I am not sexually attracted to wou or anyone and while we can have sex, I would only do it to please you"? Sounds like an asshole thing to say. Lying though seems even worse. Would anyone even be willing to date me if I'm not into sex that much? Most of the lesbian scene in my country is dating apps and clubs and those are for the explicit purpose of sexual intercourse.
I feel like the embodiment of a "useless lesbian" stereotype and I often doubt that I even deserve to be called a lesbian.
No. 432970
>>432965I just wouldn't like to come off as a predatory lesbian. I know it sounds stupid but I've heard and even read here on lolcow, anons complaining how lesbians are aggressive so I dread making the first move or even making a girl uncomfortable by assuming her being flirtatious and more touchy equals her being interested in me.
I don't want to give lesbians a bad name. It sucks because I really want to know whether she's into me or not and it's not that everyday I get a girl who has things in common with me and be so into me at the same time.
I'm in southern europe and live in a small town, so it would be awkward if I made a wrong move. I was unpleasantly surprised when a few girls told me that they think gay people are sick and they'd have no problems having them 'removed' from the society. After a few talks like that, I really like to keep a low profile as much as possible.
No. 432975
>>432970No, I know how you feel, about the predatory lesbian thing. I'm just frustrated that we're supposed to cower in shame of ourselves when straight women can continuously "be flirty and more touchy" and then demonize us for responding to it. It sounds incel-tier, but it's how I feel. I'm sorry to hear that you live in a place like that though, I hope attitudes change for the better soon.
Maybe start by asking her views on lgbt stuff?
No. 432976
>>432954Yeah… one day I wont be a fucking doormat and just do it…
>>432952He has only female friends, which isnt really bothering me too much because men are fucking exhausting so I get it, but the way he just talks about everything great she does is really really annoying. She literally called him after having sex with her bf for the first time to tell him about it and I just really really hate that. She even once called him to ask what kind of birth control I use and ehat lube he would recommend. I havent talked about our sex life like that with anyone becausenI think its rather tasteless
and kinda because i dont have friends lmfao>>432948If I find out he ever tried fucking her I will break up with him in a second. Even if it was before we met each other. He tells me he had feelings for the bitch and still wants me to be cool with her in my own four walls, its over.
No. 432996
>>432975> I'm just frustrated that we're supposed to cower in shame of ourselves when straight women can continuously "be flirty and more touchy"Yeah, sadly it's the way it is. I'm not sure if they're aware of how much pain they inflict when they play such games. I've been used by a girl in uni who made me believe she was into me but in fact did it for attention. She apologized later and we're supposed to be cool now. The memory of that still hurts. But I was stupid and blind. Live and learn, I guess.
btw you don't sound like an incel at all. It's extremely difficult to date as a lesbian even without the homophobia. I've had my share of these situations where you're not sure if they actually mean it or are just doing it for whatever reason, but this stigma of being perceived as a predatory lesbian is so strong that I just can't straight up ask them to clarify that.
> I hope attitudes change for the better soon. It's mostly small places like the one I'm in right now. Big cities aren't that bad and very few will care. Though knowing that there's still a lot of young people that think gays should be shot is scary.
> Maybe start by asking her views on lgbt stuff?Good idea. She wants us to go out together (again, might be just a friendly invitation) but I'll have that topic in mind.
Thanks, anon! Sorry to hear that you have the same frustrations.
No. 433001
>>432995Why would you want to waste your time with someone who even thought about breaking up with you? Obviously his feelings for you aren't there anymore.
>>432999No.
No. 433004
>>432976>She literally called him after having sex with her bf for the first time to tell him about itWhat the fuck? Fucking leave, anon. There's red flags all over this. And
>>432978 is absolutely right. Get out of there.
No. 433006
>>432967Anon are you me?
I have no real answers to your questions, but I understand where you're coming from. I want a qt gf but don't really care for sex, but unfortunately it's just something I'll have to figure out how to deal with when/if I ever get a gf. Life sucks.
No. 433016
>>432967I was actually came to lolcow just now to post the same thing, except I've had romantic feelings for men, women, and trans/nb alike. However, I'm starting to realize I have more of an inclination towards women just because they're friendlier and understand your struggles better. I just got back from /fit/ on 4chan and I just feel upset to my stomach because so many replies in the threads dehumanize women and state they're only good for sex and they're not even attractive enough for that. I've fallen in love with so many of my male friends, only to be heartbroken because I got to know their more vile opinions as time went on. I can't keep up with their libido and lust for sexually exaggerated features like large breasts and hips either. I always feel inferior when I'm around a man because they always neg you down, never quite listen to you intently, and always just seem mentally somewhere else. Tell him something important in several paragraphs, and he'll reply back with an unrelated meme or "lol, ok." I just feel unheard, and I want an equal partner. If all the lesbians/bis that flirted with me weren't the stereotypical teal haired SJW type, I'd already have a girlfriend and would completely renounce men. Being conservative and into chicks is a curse.
No. 433023
This is a really old vent, but something made it come back into my head again last night.
I lost my virginity to a boy about 6 years ago when I was 18. It was consensual, I was really hypersexual at the time, and he was attractive- it worked out, sorta. I fell head over heels for this stupid fuck boy, let him fuck me without a condom ("because it doesn't feel as good anon!"), and let him drag me around for nudes and videos until I was completely mentally and emotionally wrecked from it.
We were good friends and chatted about non-sex shit a lot too, but eventually I did confess my feelings to him. He returned them, but said he didn't want to date because he didn't want to do LDR. Alright.
I studied abroad in Tokyo for a year, I was still chatting with him until he ghosted me out of nowhere. I was completely and utterly alone, struggling to make friends, thousands of miles away from my friends and family back in the states, and now I felt completely unlovable and worthless because this fuckboy I liked for so long decided to ghost me for another girl. He apologized about a year later, saying his gf knew we fucked and didn't want him talking to me. We don't talk anymore, and now I'm a lesbian, and I'm so fucking mad at myself for letting this boy play such a big part in ruining what was supposed to be a fucking great experience abroad and letting myself get strung up in all of that. I developed major body image issues and started restricting my food intake, I was basically going down the road of becoming anachan. I almost took my own life at some point.
It's been years now and I've slowly gotten over that waste of an opportunity. I dated a girl for a while, years after I stopped talking to this boy, and wow, it feels great to be treasured and loved by someone you treasure and love. I realized what good kissing felt like, I realized that I'm worth someone's time and effort, and that I'm cute! It felt good to date someone who wouldn't stop talking to me just because I didn't bend over backwards to accept their opinion and their opinion only on things. Men have truly set the bar on the fucking ground. I can't believe that I'm so amazed by the fact that someone treated me with some fucking decency.
Also mini vent about the same boy but when I told him I wanted to get an IUD he insisted I get the pills instead because they would work out to the same price. I wanted the IUD because I like the low maintenance (I have the hormonal one now and thankfully it works absolutely wonderfully for me), but I guess he was upset because he'd have to feel it poking his dick if I rode him. I fucking hate men. Being a lesbian sucks sometimes, but I'd really rather be a lonely lesbian for the rest of my life then settle for a man ever again. Fuck. I can just hear him taunting me if we ever spoke again about how I have shit taste in men and that's why I'm a lesbian now, or that I'm not a real lesbian because I prefer butch/andro girls. Like fuck off, your dick fucking stank and you sucked at foreplay.
No. 433026
>>432976my boyfriend has a female friend like this. I befriended her. me and her talk now, and those two dont.
I'm also very close with the girl my first ex/the fuckboy who took my virginity left me for. also the ex that came after me. we're all tight, nobody speaks to him and he's dating an 18 year old now (he's 30)
you never know what's gonna happen, anon. play your cards tight to the chest and play them smart. or dump him. those are your options.
god speed.
No. 433039
File: 1562875608968.jpg (21.39 KB, 500x287, brtAVF1rriwvg_500.jpg)
>tfw bf is annoying me again about how he wants to do it without a condom
>hurr hurr pull out method hurr lets do it on your period
He does it "jokingly" but Jesus Christ shit is getting old. I get that condoms can get annoying but earlier this year he started pressuring me to get on birth control, specifically the implant. I literally had to chew him out about it, so he could get it through his thick skull that I wasn't comfortable with the possible side effects. (I knew a few girls who had the implant; one got pregnant anyway and the other two had growths forming in their breasts.)
He dropped it after that but I'm still steamed about how he only seemed interested in cumming inside instead of what it could do to me. ugh I feel like im being dramatic but w/e
No. 433047
>>431253I'm a shut in with terrible anxiety myself. I haven't left the house in two months except for groceries and a doctor's appointment. I'm routing for you. As other anons said, you'll need a female therapist in which you can explain your circumstances to. She'll guid you thought what you're feeling and may reveal why you feel anxiety around men. She can help with recommending medication for you that improves symptoms. If you don't want to leave the house just yet, there are online therapists you can talk with via webcam.
>>433039You're not being dramatic; he's being an asshole. It's your body, you get the say.
>>433044Asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction. You can desire to have non-sexual intimacy with someone and still aesthetically appreciate them, hence romantic orientations, but not have that magnet urge that makes you flutter for interaction with someone's genitals.
No. 433068
File: 1562882530772.jpg (54.75 KB, 505x505, gm4MMvrp.jpg)
Today I had a panic attack while showering because it's already july and I still haven't gotten a grip on my life.
I spent new years eve alone, driving around for hours despite the weather being horrible, because I couldn't tell my parents that I don't have anybody to spend the evening with.
I wanted to find friends but I'm just so shy and awkward and ugly (and autistic) that it hasn't worked out, for years. As a solution I thought I'm going to lose weight, improve the way I look, sign up on a dating app and hopefully find a bf. But so far I haven't made any progress.
I don't want to be alone on new years eve again… My future just looks so sad, I really don't know what I even live for.
Afterwards I made the mistake of looking at the facebook profiles of my old classmates which made me feel even more depressed.
Many of them have graduated already, travel, have friends and a bf, they stayed in contact with each other, but my life for the last 5 years was just shit.
I know this sounds stupid af, but I don't want to graduate, because I don't have any friends at uni, meaning I would be alone during the graduation celebrations. All the others take pictures together, are proud of their achievement, afterwards write cheesy stuff like "Thank you so much my darlings for the awesome past 4 years we spent together" - but I would be completely alone, feeling like shit, standing out as the loser I am and making my parents feel ashamed, disappointed and sad.
No. 433123
>>433118She wouldn't care, she's just doing her job and why would anyone jump to conclusions based on cars in the driveway? 3 people can use one car.
Also when I worked at a pizza place I was eating my weight in garlic bread at the end of a shift and getting jealous of all the customers having pizza so eh.
No. 433128
One of my best friends from high school committed suicide a bit over a year ago. We kind of grew apart in the years leading up to it. I know it's not my fault, but that guilt is still there. I'm doing okay, but it hurts a lot and I think about it every day. I feel like I had just gotten over a rough patch of my life where I was battling suicidal ideation, and now I suddenly can't imagine a future with this person anymore. It sucks. It's getting better though.
>>433039god, not dramatic at all. It's incredibly inconsiderate of him to even "joke" about unprotected sex. My ex would do this constantly with me (casually bringing it up, "joking" about it, etc.)… it's all fun and games to him, until one night we were having drunk sex and he came inside of me, all the while I was repeating "no". One of many reasons why we broke up.
if he's aware of how scary and life-changing a pregnancy can be for a young woman, and he still can't treat you with respect, then put that caveman straight in the garbage.
No. 433141
File: 1562906515071.jpg (2.25 MB, 3530x5000, 8904908390830483038903.jpg)
I'm so stupid anons. I've had a crush on a coworker for about a year now. I haven't had one this intense like ever and I was almost sure he liked me back. Anyway this week I tried to make small talk and it was horrible. Now I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm a complete weirdo. Thought the crush would just fizzle out but its just not going away. I hate my piece of shit brain!!!!
No. 433184
File: 1562915778058.jpeg (65.86 KB, 816x640, 6E1E12BF-364A-4059-B486-360D70…)
I’m going on vacation in a couple of days but I feel like I don’t “deserve” it.
Wanted to go somewhere in Europe against but didn’t have enough money so I’m going to Southeast Asia instead. I thought I was going to make a good amount of money this summer but so far, it hasn’t been living to my expectations. I still want to go but doing packing/buying stuff/researching is so goddamn exhausting. I think I’m depressed again. Sometimes I feel like I should’ve spent this summer getting my shit together.
No. 433186
>>432967i feel similar, but i think it's mostly just very low sex drive so i still call myself a lesbian
also calling it just low sex drive instead of asexual or some bs is a lot more accepted
if you're still romantically attracted to women i'd say you can still call yourself lesbian, it's what you're gonna look out for in dating after all
No. 433190
>>433075I'll already turn 24, so it feels as if it's too late, I've graduated 5 years ago already and still haven't done jackshit.
>>433077I'm probably the most boring person on the planet, I'm neither a nerd, nor have I any normie interests.
Plus I live in a town of maybe 5000, meaning the choice of clubs we have is very limited.
No. 433246
>>433235>>433243If he's so miserable not being with you, how the fuck would a break help him? That would mean he doesn't get to talk to you OR be with you, it makes no sense to think that would improve his mental health. Too much space is literally the problem, more space won't help unless he wants to break up or fuck other girls with the excuse that you were on a break and then crawl back for emotional support later.
Sorry for the pessimistic attitude but dramatic, emotional men are not typically selfless and considerate. They think their feelings are the be all and end all.
No. 433247
I feel like my bf's friends don't like me much, and that compared to all the girls he's friends with, I'm the worst choice.
He used to be with another girl for 3 years when they were students, and then she broke up with him. Most all of his friends are from that time, and none save two want to add me of FB or even talk to me when we meet in person. I feel like next to him I don't exist, I live in his world and I don't matter. He doesn't believe me and keeps making excuses as to why this is bullshit.
This makes me very insecure so I keep comparing myself to all the other girls he knows. Most of them have stable careers, can drive, have friends and go on holidays. I am an immigrant in a foreign country (he is too, but he's a local) with a shit physical job, very few people know me here, I had a boyfriend for 4.5 years a few years ago and dumped him because he was a deadbeat, then his family said they "hope I never come back", then another one who called me ugly, whiny and immature and then cheated on me.
My bf insists he loves me a lot and wants to be with me but I feel like he's tired of me too, or at least getting there.
I always feel like I'm a villain in everyone's story, someone who came to fuck their lives up and someone who nobody likes and is never as good as the droves of well-adjusted, mature girls with jobs who are always happy and never whiny and insecure. I can't talk to anyone about this because everyone I could talk to is a mutual friend of ours so I'd just be airing out our dirty laundry, and I can't afford therapy.
No. 433251
>>433247It's up to him to make you feel more involved and get to know his friends better. Obviously you can't try and improve the situation alone as trying to advance relationships with other males is gonna look bad. He needs to put more effort in so you don't feel like a third wheel all the time.
Are you studying or working? You should also seek to improve yourself/your life so you don't feel as insecure in comparison to these random other girls. Obviously I'm missing context, but what's stopping you from learning to drive or having a job/studying?
No. 433254
>>432252>>432252A lot of them dont tho and have such racial autism and sperging that would make hitler proud. Or they do it only in secrecy.
I lived in the US for 20 years
No. 433258
I'm so tired of being such a doormat, everybody always continues stepping over me.
My whole life my parents ingrained in me to never talk when others do, to always be polite and helpful, I rarely talk at all and yet my father often calls me arrogant and an asshole, no matter how my siblings treated me, I was always only told that I as the oldest need to look after them. Whenever I complain about costumers mistreating me (and me not doing anything) he ends up scolding me "Is it really so bad, can't you just suck it up and be friendly?!" (even when I told him that I was). I constantly work extra for my collegues, I even secretely give costumers discounts because I'm scared of how they would react if I told them how much it really costs.
Today again, I wasted over 4 hours in a class, because I was too much of a chicken to stand up for myself. I only wanted to ask the teacher 1 question, yet she chatted for ages with others, helped the girls sitting next, behind and in front of me, always only skipping me, until there was only another student, her and I left. I waited til 20 minutes after class, yet she still wasn't finished.
I should have just said "Hey, I only have one question and I have to go to work soon". But instead I didn't get my question answered and nearly missed my train.
Now I have to go again next week, just for something that wouldn't even take a minute to answer.
No. 433263
>>433251Driving lessons are super expensive where I live and I use public transport so I don't have an excuse to spend 1000€ on driving lessons since I can't even afford a car.
I do have a job (I did say I had a physical job) but it's a typical low wage immigrant job (cleaning, kitchen etc) whereas all of them have office jobs in their respective fields and have time to look nice and take care of themselves. Recently I had to attend a wedding in a wrinkled sweater because it was the only thing I could put in my backpack to change into and I had to attend straight after work. Of course I had to take photos and looked like hot shit with messy hair and greasy face next to everyone. But I can't get any other job (I'm applying left and right) because I lack experience and I'm foreign.
No. 433298
>>433086I can't speak for the other anons, but for me, I know what I ultimately want isn't just friendship. I do want to kiss and hold and cuddle a girl in a romantic sense, in a way that would definitely overstep the normal boundaries of female friendship. No matter how close I am to some of my female friends, the way I give them a friendly peck on the cheek or hold their hand while going out just isn't the same.
For me, the "whatever I have with men is more sexual in nature" (but I'm not that anon) is more like… I'll deal with it. I don't particularly mind sex with men and I'll accept it if I'm in the mood, but outside of sex, I don't want to hold their hand or kiss them or cuddle with them. I can't see myself settling down with a man, I can only see them as a temporary person in my bed.
No. 433300
>>433258You're wasting your breath explaining yourself to your shitty parents. They're in the wrong here and won't understand that you have boundaries and can't just exist to please others. As for your instructor and whatnot, you can definitely teach yourself to interrupt people (politely) without completely steamrolling. Apologetically interject and people will let it slide. Especially if it's a question to a teacher you need to just speak up, no way around it. Same in your career, you're going to have to learn to act confident to get yourself heard. It's a "fake it till you make it" thing, go through the motions even if they're mortifying and feel wrong, and you'll eventually get used to it and do it without issues.
Much love, anon.
No. 433364
>>433348>>433361Hahahaha no, I'm not Rick Astley. But I have sampled him before.
>>433353I'm not famous by any means, I just happen to have a song that's been memed to death. It's a situation where people know the song name, but not the person who made it, I guess.
No. 433366
File: 1562953783724.jpg (35.01 KB, 540x303, c93e6436-414a-43e7-a766-c2d911…)
My exes mother is being threatened by her brother. The whole story is a bit complicated, but the already well off pos war vet wants 200k€ from them because of a piece of land their mother owned.
Ex wants to sell his car to help his parents to pay it all off. I offered him to come over for a few days (I live in a different city) so he can try to relax and take his mind off of this but since his mother could be in danger he probably won't. I'm really worried about his mental health at this point.
I already told him to record if anything happens, I really hope his pos uncle fucks up and ends up in jail.
No. 433492
File: 1562976317382.jpeg (863.63 KB, 906x936, 6C1490F2-C526-4313-9BC4-54954E…)
For fuck sakes, I can't get the song Pacman fever out of my head! Even when I'm having sex, all I can think about is pacman fever.
No. 433554
I can't get a fucking job, I've been unemployed for so long. My last job lasted 2.5 years and I finally quit because it was fucking abusive. I worked in a gas station kiosk at a huge chain grocery store (chafe way). We didn't get breaks. We could technically take sick days BUT since they would only schedule one person at a time (the gas station was open 16 hours a day and they would have 3 consecutive shifs one person each if that makes sense) and so they would make the person who was working before you work a double shift (again, with no breaks). Our salaries could never go above 11$ per hour (and I didn't even make that) plus we didn't get the same benefits as the cashiers who worked in the store (who made more than we did, and got breaks). And yet we were "union" and so I still got union fees taken out of my paycheck. There's a MILLION other reasons why I quit though.
My coworker quit (there were only four of us, now 3) I worked 6 days in a row for 7 weeks straight. I was in a college class at the time. I kept being told they couldn't find a new person to hire and they were SUPER hesitant to bring regular cashiers to the fuel station for some reason. And we were pressured to sell these stupid fucking bags of these nasty ass covered pretzels. I COULD NOT for the life of me sell these things, customers DID NOT want them (understandably), kept getting yelled at for not being able to sell them. My boss then threatened me "if you can't do your job, we'll find someone who will, and cut your hours". And I was like oh really???!?!!?!? I WISH A BITCH WOULD. I might actually get 2 days off a week then and work less than 45 hours!!!! God Forbid!!!!! And that's only scratching the surface of how shitty it was to work there. One of my coworks was an autistic manchild who I really want to go on a side tangent about but won't.
I live with my parents and my dad gave me a ton of shit for quitting, even though he knew all the reasons I quit, and didn't care. Failed the class I was in because of work, and was paying out of pocket for it. I've applied for 2 walmart locations, 2 costco locations, 9 starbucks locations, a local coffee shop, a ticket office at the performing arts center and other places I can't remember. None have called me back. And most places REQUIRE at least 3 references that aren't friends or family. I don't have any of those. And almost all jobs on craigslist require experience that I don't have. People in my life keep telling me to "just get a job". Well you know what it isn't that fucking easy, bitch I've TRIED and they shut up when I ask for suggestions. Working gives me SO MUCH anxiety but I'm still trying anyway.
My parents piss me off even more because they're extremely neglectful people and "homeschooled" me for religious reasons but didn't really school me at all beyond basic reading, writing and very basic math. Didn't make any effort to socialize me or make sure I had any remotely valuable skills or education/experience beyond religion. And now they just expect me to be a high functioning adult who can support myself. They really shouldn't have been allowed to have kids.
I can't get a college degree because I was rejected for student loans, plus I kept failing college classes and I think I might have an undiagnosed learning disability. Not to mention I have no fucking idea what I want to do. I keep thinking about how more and more jobs are becoming automated and it's making me really depressed.
I'm so fucking depressed and angry about all of this. I don't know how I will ever get a job again.
No. 433560
>>433324Are you a VA who does joke songs?
To my knowledge, the only songs that get memed are jokes to begin with, like making songs out of cringe posts online
No. 433572
>>433560Not a VA. My song isn't supposed to be a meme, but someone made a meme video out of it which caused its popularity to skyrocket. I guess I didn't actually explain why I'm annoyed. The person who made the meme video is someone I respect, because they're very talented. I really love their video. However, I keep seeing people repost the video and crop out the creator's watermark, then add some dumb caption to it. It frustrates me to no end seeing someone's work modified to remove their unobtrusive watermark. I would have no issue with people making new memes out of that video, so long as the original creator's watermark is kept in.
Another one of my songs was featured in another meme video, and the only place the song was uploaded in full on Youtube was on an artist's speedpaint video (I don't really upload my stuff to Youtube). I saw a comment on the video shitting on the artist because "this is the only video that features this song in full on Youtube". It legitimately frustrated me, I don't condone that shitty behaviour at all.
On my end, because of the popularity, people have reposted the song on websites that I already have the song uploaded to. Most people have removed the song when I asked them to, but there are a few that just ignore my messages. And I don't want to file a copyright claim because I'm not willing to give out my personal details to a website where my personal details might be forwarded on to the person I'm copyright claiming. It's hard to go into detail without giving up my identity, but everything I'm saying here is what happens to any remotely popular artist, I guess. Some people have absolutely no respect, it's super frustrating.
No. 433702
I'm starting to really struggle to deal with one of my housemates. She is easy to live with, and not a bad person at all, but I just find her personality hugely draining and annoying.
She doesn't seem to have any interests outside her appearance, so all she talks about is clothes,boys,her diet, the gym, skincare, etc and on top of it being hugely boring and shallow, I have finally just about managed to be okay with how I look (or at least I can deal with it and not think about it too much) and the constant body talk makes me really uncomfortable.
We just don't have like, a single thing in common and I'm tired of spending time with her, and now I'm getting the thing where you admit to yourself you find someone annoying, and suddenly everything they do is annoying.
We all have decided to live together for another year so I'm going to have to find a way to deal with her and not be a bitch, cause she hasn't actually done anything wrong, she's just not someone I'd choose to spend my time with.
No. 433711
>>433702Why are you spending time with her if you don't even like her? It's the same as a work colleague, you can just be nice enough to do what needs to be done with her and occasionally eat a meal together but you can spend your own time doing whatever you want. Go be with your own friends, if you don't want to talk to her let her know you're busy with something and slowly dissolve the social side of your relationship. You can say you don't want to talk about body stuff because of your issues, and offer alternative topics you know? Just don't be a jerk to her.
You played yourself by agreeing to live with her again and pretending to like her, you can only blame yourself.
No. 433717
>>433715He sounds like such a bitter bitch. Why should you suffer just because he does? He should either find a similarly-paying job with more flexible hours or days, or he can suck it up.
If he doesn't like the way you clean, he can hire a cleaner to solve all the non-existent problems and show you how it's done, or do it himself. Simple as.
No. 433773
>>433719It does not. It's samey all throughout until maybe the last third where it picks up… and drops everything immidiately.
I didn't like the characters myself, but I quite enjoyed the more mature feeling of a classic shounen story. I'm a sucker for those.
I don't get what's so particularly good about it too. It's a solid show with consistent quality and fairly consistent tension. It has a good balance of humour and drama. But I wouldn't say it's a masterpiece everyone is required to watch. If you're into darker while still very obviously shonen-type stories, it's great. But certainly not a must for every anime watcher.
It can be a moving coming of age story or "fragile balance between human and monster" story, but if you're not really into that, you can skip it.
Reiko is a goddess though.
No. 433856
>>433713Oh, I try. He does like some good stuff, but then he also likes shit. He also gets frustrated in me disliking and uncomfortable.. It has slavery and is overall grossly misogynistic but "He later treats his basically-a-child slave better! he sees her as a human but she's still his slave"
Not to mention the main story plot is that the MC has a false rape claim and later gets his revenge on her by having her renamed "Whore", and in the novel, she's raped to death while people excitedly watch.
No. 433869
>>433856> It has slavery and is overall grossly misogynistic but "He later treats his basically-a-child slave better! he sees her as a human but she's still his slave"Not to mention the main story plot is that the MC has a false rape claim and later gets his revenge on her by having her renamed "Whore", and in the novel, she's raped to death while people excitedly watch.
What the fuck, people who enjoy this shit are truly subhumans. Consider if you really want bf who watch this shit. Fucking respect yourself girl.
No. 433870
>>433805I've noticed this cognitive dissonance too. I mean, yeah you can shit on other women's looks, nitpick and make fun of them but that's not really very
feminist, if that's what you like to spend your free time with- it's pretty much the opposite of that. So idk why those people claim to be feminists in the first place…maybe to feel better about themselves and things they say.
No. 434041
File: 1563062295282.jpg (59.58 KB, 933x699, nootnoot.jpg)
>>433905We're not official but it still makes me mad. Happens with friends sometimes too and I just don't understand it. It would be one thing if I were trying to make everyone hang with me all the time, but these people are literally the ones approaching me with requests for plans and things.
I make sure to reserve the time and wipe my schedule for these people, and for what? So they can, on a whim, throw me like a piece of garbage when they find something better to do or are just "not in the mood."
I just don't have the patience. I'd rather people leave me alone completely than keep up this annoying ass pretense like they're my pals or care about me in a romantic way when they can't even be assed to come have fun and swim in a pool with me for an evening. Fuck me.
No. 434055
>>434042Why the fuck should anyone have to be 'understanding' of that? It's disgusting and disrespectful, no daughter or wife would be okay with it.
You should confront him. It doesn't matter how great he is to you when he's treating your mother like trash and being a nasty pervert.
No. 434061
>>434041I wouldn't give them a second chance unless they initiate AND host. Also any guy who is whiney and tired after a day of errands or chores is inferior anyways, personally after I get my shit done I get a second wind by evening and wanna see my boyfriend
who has enough energy for 1am MtG nights but no time for me after work at like 5pm, not even for nice dinner or snacking and tv reeeEEnoot freaking noot
No. 434073
File: 1563068030706.jpg (146.2 KB, 770x1001, hohum.jpg)
Several months are taken off of my life expectancy every time a farmer makes a "My bf uses porn/cheats/treats me like shit. Thoughts?" post, and we get two or three-a-day around these parts.
Like, I get that they want to vent, but what kind of response are they expecting?
You know what you have to do. Dump him. Cut his bepis off, Karen. It's not even worth replying with "dump him" because you know they aren't going to, they're just gonna keep letting their fucking doughy, ugly, limp-dick, pornsick boyfriends fart on their couches all day.
I still want to shout "dump him" from the mountaintops, though.
No. 434141
>>434042That's fucking depressing. Why are men such useless pigs? No, scratch that. That's insulting to pigs.
Stories like this are why I don't trust men and don't want to get married.
If I were you I would cut off all communication with your dad and tell him you'll only talk to him again if he is faithful to your mom again. At the very least I hope your mom divorces him and takes all his money and valuable assets.
>>434073Probably because they know that that's what 90% of men are like and the men who aren't like that are very rare and almost always taken but they still don't want to be alone.
No. 434179
File: 1563107631274.jpg (79.63 KB, 480x480, 053853853.jpg)
I'm pretty sad about TiMs and male shitposters shitting up Crystal Cafe.
I used to kind of like it as a more laid-back, sweet alternative to Lolcow, but honestly? I think I prefer Lolcow's general saltiness, disdain for any excessive foolishness, and the way mods ruthlessly bring down the hammer on anything that smells even vaguely of inceloid trash, since that's apparently the only truly effective way to create a free space for women.
I'd rather talk here and get comforted (or called an idiot bitch) by a majority of other actual women, than get worthless replies from some unhinged male who believes women need to hear his input by force. There's a very good reason we're not making "Femanon General" threads on /r9k/ and hanging out in them, so why do they feel the need to try and make any imageboard with even a whiff of female users into their personal dumping ground?
The peak of a high-tech, self-censoring, data-collecting dystopian internet can't come soon enough. I can't wait until there's an app that automatically detects the gender of anyone you interact with online, and allows you to block their posts from your sight in advance if you just don't feel like reading any scrote garbage on a particular day. I'm just so tired of it all.
No. 434195
>>434179Picture dumps can be done by anyone, gender doesn't really matter in that case
Just ask for something and you can receive it
No. 434204
File: 1563115676555.gif (480.73 KB, 499x315, oh_well.gif)
>>434201I'm pretty sure I've already seen some of them get offended by that AI that can accurately guess your sex and age.
No. 434214
File: 1563118639773.jpg (41.15 KB, 720x960, 23578679834.jpg)
I'm so fucking mad that every time you think you've found a platonic male friend you're having a good time with he either hits on you and/or suddenly drops you like a hot fucking potato when he starts dating a girl. Why does this fucking meme exist, I hate losing male friends to this and this dumb bitch ends up being hopeful despite it happening literally every time. Every time. I wish I had a close brother so I could have one male friend to keep me from 100% pinkpilling and believing that men have some small redeeming qualities and aren't all inhumane garbage.
No. 434215
>>434126>>434145>>434148It's super annoying. I can tell whenever this tranny will be in the vc it's going to be centered around him sperging about something or insulting others. For some reason the friend who created the discord thinks this is highly entertaining, I find it obnoxious and unfunny. It's really hard to have a conversation or get to know any of the other members because everything is constantly redirected towards the awful shit tranny says.
Sometimes my friend mutes the tranny on purpose just to get him riled up, so when he gets unmuted he unleashes a verbal tirade that's apparently oh so hilarious.
Meh.
No. 434216
>>434215Just "jokingly" bully the shit out of him until he goes into a hilarious narcissistic rage and either shuts up or leaves the chat whenever you're around. Your friend being owner (or mod) gives you a bit of immunity if you're close to them, doubly so if you can sweet-talk them into giving you mod powers yourself.
If the tranny complains, just fake-apologize, but make sure the constant subtext is that he needs to chill out and stop being so sensitive all the time.
No. 434217
>>434214I have a few male friends I've known for years, but I've accepted that we won't be as close as they get girlfriends and wives.
A few of them I only talk to maybe a few times a year but it's not like it makes them my enemies or that I've lost them.
Try not to take it personally because it's really nothing to do with your character or how they see you. If you were getting married to a man, wouldn't it feel a little inappropriate if he had a slew of female besties that he kept on a pedestal and told everything to?
No. 434264
File: 1563128039471.png (Spoiler Image,867.8 KB, 1956x956, f24.png)
>>434179(samefagging)
I mean, holy fuck. This is how comfortable they've become on CC. How could it have fallen so far? What the fuck happened??
No. 434325
>>434261Word. Out of all my girlfriends only one has been emotionally stable and after a mutual breaking up she ended up with an emotionally high maintenance possessive psycho bitch who destroyed her. I'm a bislut too and even though I love the fuck out of women I can't date them anymore because it seems the WLW scene is a mine field of mental issues and unstable people. I hate it.
The U-haul streotype (I love that term because it's too accurate) is a huge turn off to me too but it always seems like WLWs are always looking for massive amounts of emotional labor and commitment instead of casual dating and FWB sex. I recognize it's just because of how women are socialized from birth though (fooling around is a no-no for a fine lady!) and a lot of lesbians/bi women are traumatized by their upbringing as a gay teen and because the LGBT scene just seems to encourage drama whoring but it still pisses me off.
I wish straight girls would date me, I'm extra pissed off by shitty men who don't treat their girlfriends right because they have the privilege of actually dating a stable girl. No. 434327
>>434323He said something slightly shallow before we met up. When I suggested the pool he joked about being shy about his dad bod so I jested back that it would compliment my mom bod. He replied in no uncertain terms woah, woah, woah he wasn't looking to hook up with an actual fat chick. So I sent him a full body pic and frankly told him to decide if I was anyone worth the pursuit. He backpedaled and prattled about me not being fat and gave a bunch of heart faces and such.
Maybe my pictures just don't convey my candid appearance that well, even so, I just find the whole ordeal very rude. He's just a below average guy who thinks he deserves a model and acts like a cunt to women who don't please him.
No. 434332
>>429568>>434303Who invites a first date to grilling with your parents?
You are out of touch, it's so absurd he probably didn't think you were serious. IDK, if I were him I'd totally bail as well.
No. 434336
>>434332It was a nice day for pool and grill and I live with my stepdad.
Would you have at least let the other person know you suddenly were not comfortable before bailing? I mean, I would have.
>>434331Gee, I guess.
No. 434345
>>434327you soung legitimately autistic, did
you wanna just hang out w him or did you wanna fuck?
No. 434349
File: 1563140800583.jpg (22.81 KB, 622x464, hank.jpg)
>>434261>>434325Wow, lots to consider here.
>unironic use of the troon-term WLW>I'm needy (but DAE sick of these needy lesbos?)>un-ironic preference for shallow relationships with scrotes because women be complicated amirite>get your u-haul the fuck away from me, I want casual sex but also monogamy and commitment but not that muchand the cherry on top
>a dead-serious insinuation that the "WLW" dating scene is full of crazy bitches, compared to the straight dating scene which is full of well-adjusted men who aren't crazy at all, no sirI know you guys are just venting, but you couldn't sound like more stereotypical flakey bihets if you tried.
No. 434350
>>434303I don't know why some anons are calling you clueless and autistic, I don't think inviting him for a grill was weird. I'm a Eurofag so it might be a cultural difference though.
Yeah, it does sound like the guy was just expecting a quick lay and not actually getting to know a girl.
On the plus side, at least you didn't waste much time with him!
No. 434351
>>434336Of course I wouldn't say anything, that would be extremely uncomfortable.
My point is that you probably shouldn't use tinder if you are this sensitive and naive, while some people are may be looking for a relationship and stuff, the vast majority won't care about you and your feelings and maybe even take advantage of you.
No. 434357
>>434351I think you're right in that I don't understand current dating culture where this level of cowardice is acceptable. You may have a point that Tinder isn't for me despite being honest and stating what I want upfront. Seems like men on there are sociopaths.
>>434352I don't get it. But considering what other anons said about him just wanting to fuck and me being naive, I'm kind of glad my stepdad was home.
No. 434373
>>434359Literally never had this problem with any Discord server I've joined but then again I actually join the conversation and bring in something to discuss instead of waiting for someone to notice me. Any group is bound to have a core block that interacts with each other way more than others, but do you think people get in by never partaking in the conversation? No, they've been active for some time and bonded with the other people because of that. Discord servers aren't really for people who expect to have a message board instead of an interactive real-time discussion.
I'm glad that Discord servers exist because back when I was a teen chat rooms and irc channels were popular, you just picked a channel and joined it, met new people and after a few months you had integrated into the group. People have been so pampered by Facebook groups for the past 10 years so that they expect a slow-moving discussion they can jump back in the next day or start a thread and get reactions as they please.
No. 434382
File: 1563142827734.jpeg (103.22 KB, 628x747, angrybihetsama.jpeg)
>>434364There's the homophobia I knew was bubbling just beneath the bihet surface! I'm not even a lesbian, just feel sorry for lesbians having to deal with allegedly
"bisexual" women who don't take them seriously as partners whatsoever.
No. 434387
>>434373I already had to leave 2 servers, because despite me being there since they started and basically texting with them every day, I still never managed to get into the "friend group".
I wonder if it's because I wasn't enough of a queer special snowflake or whether I'm an asshole (or autistic) lol
No. 434526
>>434349>unironic use of the troon-term WLWdid you know that troons didn't invent nor did they monopolize these terms? tf
>I'm needy (but DAE sick of these needy lesbos?)>un-ironic preference for shallow relationships with scrotes because women be complicated amiriteway to misrepresent what I said, asshole. I AM needy and because of that I have insecurity about my ability to be a place of stability for other women… Not that I think all women are dramatic unstable bitches. I just have the misfortune to run into those types.
>>get your u-haul the fuck away from me, I want casual sex but also monogamy and commitment but not that muchGod forbid I don't want to move in with someone immediately after sexing them?? Monogamous relationship IS what I want but they seem to move way too fucking fast with women and I'm put off by that (intimacy issue). Burn me the stake for being a bad gay.
No. 434600
>>434599You beat me anon, I was going to post the same. The hypocrisy is too much kek
>>434595I bet your bf is into some of the shit you just mentioned, probably all of them.
No. 434664
File: 1563170687586.jpeg (56.11 KB, 750x917, wciwkzuulca31.jpeg)
Why is reddit so often the embodiment of a guillible 30 year old man? Why do they believe this shit is real? I'm just amazed at this point. Does anyone even use kik anymore?
No. 434677
>>434675Hey anon I know it's shit and it hurts a lot that men are coddled into getting away with feeling like they're owed our bodies even as children, but please don't let him win. I know you're tired and I know it's so fucking unfair, because we were kids and we didn't get to decide what happened to us, but a tiny part of you keeps going despite him to have gotten you this far. There is a light that never goes out. And that's not just me admitting to still being afraid of the dark too. Somehow we got here and that's the important thing, don't discount how you did it. Pretend I'm you, if you like. You'd probably never tell me to end it. We're always much kinder to others than we are to ourselves.
I'm so sorry. I know it hurts. I'd hug you if I could.
No. 434711
In 2 weeks I will write my final exam and as somebody who's already anxious on a normal basis, I'm of course super scared about it.
Now my mother told me that they plan to go to vacation the days before and the day of my exam, asking me if I'd prefer them not going.
I told her that I of course can't and don't want to stop them, but that I would prefer not having to be alone the evening before since I'm likely a crying mess.
Now my mother said they won't go, but she's also pissed at me. I told her that I don't want her to be angry at me, that they should go if she wants that so much, because now I feel guilty over having ruined their vacation and I can't exactly concentrate on studying when she's angry at me. But then she told me that I always say everything is her fault and that I always try to guilttrip her? But, I am the one feeling guilty right now? Why ask for my opinion if you only accept one answer?
She constantly does this, being angry at me, never relenting no matter how often I apologize and always making herself out to be the grand victim who sacrifices things for my sake - even if I never asked for any of that in the first place.
I'm not some type of master manipulator, I only said how I honestly feel about it.
Now she's super angry, going around slamming doors. What should I do?
No. 434780
>>434764big congrats on your graduation, anon! im sure you'll make an amazing lawyer/whatever other job law school qualifies you for.
is there a chance you can trick your parents into not going? i mean, they already suck and have apparently told you, verbally, that they're not proud of you (wtf), so maybe they wont be mad if they miss it? tell them they changed the date or sth and go to graduation alone on the day of. it sucks being alone on such a big day but by the sound of your parents you're better off alone.
even if they have a narc meltdown about how its UR FAULT WE MISSED IT BC YOURE TOO STUPID TO EVEN TELL US THE DATE RIGHT maybe its a better shot putting up with a private narc rage than a public one in front of your teachers, classmates & their families
No. 434804
File: 1563200137402.jpg (150.71 KB, 1130x1300, grumpy-old-man-19577484.jpg)
I'm tired of living in the arctic circle with its dumbass weather.
The people are lovely, the country is great otherwise, but fuck this weather. Summer lasts for 3 months but it rains half the time anyway, spring lasts for a week and everything blooms and then dies as soon as you look away, nothing fucking grows here and if it does it tastes like styrofoam. Tomatoes taste like nothing, shops sell watery milk, chicken looks like it's been injected with saline to make it heavier. Berries are the only thing worth buying or picking here and you can do that in 2 measly 2-week windows after which they disappear from the shelves or there's like 2 boxes of rotten fruit left. Then as soon as it came, summer is gone, giving way to a week of nice autumn, then 9 months of misery, snow, sleet, ice, everything looking straight up like downtown Chernobyl. Fuck off.
No. 434808
>>434764>>434785Sever anon. Fuck those people. Lie about the date and time and never talk to those pieces of shit again.
Do you think campus/school security could help keep them out? That's a stretch but idk much about graduation/event security procedures lol
Congratulations on all your hard work and achievements! You'll go far in life and how exciting to continue the ascent! Godspeed
No. 434902
File: 1563213400147.jpeg (Spoiler Image,1.45 MB, 4032x3024, D5930CA9-1243-4B33-B74B-6F32B8…)
My ex is a piece of shit, def don’t get why I tried to be friends with her
Invited me to stay at her place but has phone sex loudly both mornings I was there. Then lied to my face when I confronted her to like tone it down because I could hear.
Her house is a disgusting mess and I honestly don’t understand how she could live in it.
I should have just stayed in the hotel like I was planning too.
She also has her own discord and let’s underage kids post porn and doesn’t see an issue with it because if they get in trouble it’s their own fault
She lies about being Japanese when she’s actually Hispanic and even changed her name legally to a Japanese one
Lies to everyone around her and will never stop
She’s gross and I’m sooooooo sad I gave almost 10 years of my life to a disgusting piece of shit
Spoilered the image of her fucking freezer door
No. 434948
>>434879Stop being a sad faggot and train your body and get some skills.
Learn how to grow your own food, build your own shelter, defend yourself with weapons and the body.
Learn about the local flora and fauna around you to see what you can do with it.
If you're going to live for yourself you need to refine your body and mind. Challenge yourself physically.
No. 435066
File: 1563235908289.jpg (128.69 KB, 1280x738, MV5BOWU0NjNmNDItZjA3OC00YmM0LT…)
>>435056if you're in the US, you can postpone your jury duty. read the entire summons and there should be information regarding postponing somewhere on there, sometimes there's a perforated bit they want you to fill out and mail back, but there should at least be a phone number or instructions or something.
No. 435069
>>435066I went to their website and submitted a date I can appear, but I won't know if it got approved for two days, and the date I requested is next week. I'm wondering if that's too soon, but the entire week of, and before my summons, I have dentist, therapist, and doctor's appointment, as well as piano lessons and a sports team I just signed up for and can't miss. I can't move any of the appointments because they were made months ago and they'll be rescheduled months out. Why can't jury piss off; my city is ultra left wing and they let the criminal go most of the time. Some guy exposing his junk was let go, and wound up in prison two weeks later because he did it again. Just, urgh.
No. 435076
File: 1563237884813.jpg (298.76 KB, 1920x1080, Shootme.jpg)
Being on this site has made me so self-conscious of my laugh lines. I know the whole "nasolabial folds" thing is sorta a meme and dumb nitpicking but I can't help checking for them in the mirror every morning. Mine are barely there but I still looked up anti-laugh line creams even though I'm only 21. Being insecure about aging sucks.
No. 435091
>>435076i had this feeling when i began to notice small ones beginning at my nose. it's probably completely false, but my mom told me this: laugh lines and smile lines (the ones near your eyes) mean you've expressed joy many times in your life!
flip it and reverse it, anon. it happens to everyone, but now when i notice those little creases near my nose i smile even more. don't nitpick yourself for things you can't control.
No. 435139
>>434879You're only 30. The world is enormous and that's truly an understatement - I am sure there's something out there you can find purpose in. What parts of your life are you dissatisfied with? Your career? Perhaps you could consider a career change. Feeling bored in general? Try taking up a hobby. Your social life? Maybe try getting closer to a coworker, reconnecting with old friends, or register for fitness classes at your gym. Not everyone is "out to get you" and you are not a "burden". And I am sure there is someone out there that will like you for who you are. And I promise you are not as "awkward and annoying" as you think - other people are usually caught up in their own business to notice. Plus it's lucky that you have loving parents. Not everyone can say that. You could spend more time together with them.
I hope you find peace in your life.
No. 435148
Yesterday I went to a friend’s birthday which usually invites all the people whom he knows because we live in a pretty small town and everyone knows each other.
There was this kid, he’s not exactly a kid but his mind is. He’s 20 but he has the mind of a 12 years old. It’s not very noticeable, people may also or not notice it. It’s just that when you start to know him, you notice that he can’t keep a smart conversation about lot of topics. Also, he has some kind of habits like repeating the same questions over and over again, or having to touch everything because otherwise he gets anxious.
His parents feel ashamed of him. I don’t know how to put it in other words.
You see, as I said, we live in a pretty small town so everyone can notice that whatever this boy has, it’s not perfectly fine. Except for his parents.
They never told anyone about it, not even their family and I never thought how bad it may be until yesterday.
When birthday boy was blowing the candles, this boy got all excited and started clapping and laughing. Then he got really serious and turned to his mother (I was close to them) and asked her “is my retardation showing?”, and then the excuse of a mother he has smiled at him and said something like “no, darling, and don’t say these things here or people will notice it.”
I wanted to cry. How can you educate your son to feel ashamed of who he is? I get that everybody wants to have perfect children and nobody likes to have some troubles while parenting but this? Make your own child think there is something to feel ashamed about himself? For what? So people won’t talk behind your back (they do anyways!)? So people won’t think your son is “special, different”? What’s wrong with it?
I felt so bad for him, I couldn’t believe what he said. He seemed very quiet afterwards.
I can’t comprehend how can someone have the courage to make his own son think it’s okay to hide something that he is, basically because they seem ashamed of his behaviour.
No. 435149
>>434711what the fuck, that's such childish behaviour
she could've asked you before planning too, or at least not write it off as your fault when it's not
don't make this another thing to stress about, the exam is hard enough
No. 435190
File: 1563270639902.jpeg (89.78 KB, 490x406, 73239350-BBBF-4E4D-9C66-B0A005…)
can feel myself slowly being replaced and forgotten by someone i thought was really into me, so i’m starving myself because hunger pangs numb out the heartache i feel. i hate being 19 and inexperienced (never had a bf only puppy e-dating). it’s rare that i get crushes on people, when i do i get in to deep, put all my eggs in one basket, and get sad when i see that it’s not reciprocated the same. i know that adults usually like to keep their options open when it comes to dating by mingling with other people or just continually searching for something better, not being invested in the first person they’re into. but i’m not like that, at all. i like someone, and they’re the only person i can kline and show romantic interest in, that’s it. and i know that most of what i feel is due to low self esteem and inexperience but it’s still a bitch to come to terms with. i know i’ll probably grow out of it as i get older and get over it but right now i just feel so worthless, undesirable, and invisible
No. 435262
>>435255I relate. Some days I thought I had a fake smile on my face and people still asked if I was OK. My depression has been running strong now for nearly 2 decades and some days it's gone and some days (like today) it's present and I skipped an important lab I shouldn't have with no excuses until I turn up tomorrow.
I was in therapy but I had a change of address and couldn't attend any longer this was nearly a few years ago. I was on anti depressants in the absence of therapy NHS accepted that I had been in therapy so just gave me 40mg and that was it. I hated the tablets complained switched around dosages, tablets, ballooned in size, already had social anxiety became more anxious. Took myself off antidepressants had a bad few months. I've isolated myself a lot from people.
But. The fogginess of the antidepressants lifted a few months ago and I've been working out, forcing myself outside and going places I normally wouldn't and I feel better as a person and lighter. Today is a bad day and this morning felt like everything was impossible but I can already feel my mood lifting a lot. It ebs and flows. And I find exercise has helped me the most although sometimes there can be days with no motivation. It's just always a battle it seems.
No. 435276
>>435262Thanks for sharing, anon. It's "nice" to have someone understand you for once.
The whole medication thing sounds pretty exhausting. It's good that you're trying different things though, I hope better days are coming for you…
No. 435314
>>435311NTA but you lose a LOT of baby fat by 21ish and a 22 year old in a completely different world than a high schooler, while the gap is small the difference in power is huge
Plus teenagers are all gangly and unstable, I don’t trust adults that pursue someone too young to be trusted with voting power
No. 435336
>>435311So you think that I am the one who's in the wrong for thinking it's creepy? I could never imagine dating somebody her age, I already felt guilty for liking him even though our age difference is not that big.
It just sucks, back then I never made a move because I thought I'm not his type (he dated a very small, cute and babyfaced girl before), but his gf now is more like I me - just nearly 7 years younger and better looking…
No. 435338
>>435336I don't think you're wrong, anon. My own experience tells me there's no way a man won't take advantage of being more mature, having more freedom and being more knowledgeable about the world than his girlfriend. Adult men who are willing to date underage girls are seeking a power dynamic that will allow them, at best, to flatter their own ego and get away with being a prick, and at worst, to be outright abusers.
I don't think you should be focusing on pining after this guy and feeling envy, though. He sounds sleazy and gross.
No. 435377
>>435353 I only recently found out so probably not for long.
I just dont know how to talk to him about it or approach it and i dont know yet if he knows but from what the
victim has said, he doesnt know.
It terrifies me to imagine he is a rape apologist but its probably going to be the case.
No. 435382
File: 1563301880472.png (366.31 KB, 469x894, death_by_digi_m-d4gx8k0.png)
I fucking had enough of life, I don't even wanna bother talking of it but everything seems dull and meaningless.
My long term relationship is failing too, he has like 0 interest in me, all the compliments/ dick pics I'm getting are from men I'm scared of.
I would honestly appreciate it if I die right here right now, every consequences seems bad.
No. 435410
>>435336No im saying you thinking you are some old hag at 22 23 is stupid and that you are extremely youthful and fresh faced at that age too
>>435314Im talking purely physical differences.. I was contesting anon who thinks early twenties is a hag or visually visibly older than teens and its not true.; its the same reason that makes exlusive or reoccuring ephebophilia retarded because its about control and power rather than aesthetics most of the time
No. 435458
File: 1563311654346.gif (15.54 KB, 600x450, sadcat.gif)
Me being dumb goes on tinder to find a boyfriend. Every guy I talk to ghost me after making every attempt to keep a conversation going and appearing interesting.
I also have this insecure feeling that if I am the one starting the convo after getting a match. It meant I am ugly and they swipe me on accident.
No. 435472
>>435458It's okay anon, I drank the dumb bitch juice too and signed up for Tinder as well after ending a LDR. Every guy I have met up with has either taken advantage of me or ghosted me. At first I didn't mind because I was legitimately just trying to get over my ex. I always viewed Tinder as a meat market, but in the back of my mind I always heard those stories about people finding their boyfriends or girlfriends on it so I was hopeful I'd click with someone or they'd consider me special.
Naaaaaah.
I deactivated it two days ago. Good riddance.
No. 435491
>>435139Anon you replied to and
>CareerI have a great career in the field I have a degree in. I make good money and worked really hard to get where I am.
>Social lifeI have a lot of acquaintances that I'm mutually cordial with but not that close.
>HobbiesI have a lot of (solitary) hobbies because if I didn't I would probably lose the last sense of purpose I feel like I have.
>ParentsMy parents are busy with their own life with their own problems and goals. Despite loving me we're not very close and understandably they don't live for their adult children's sake.
>other people are usually caught up in their own business to notice.Exactly. I don't matter to people at all. I'm not a part of anyone's life. I have no value because a person who's not a part of a social network isn't a person at all. That was my point.
I'm too damaged to ever have a boyfriend and I'm lowkey afraid of men due to my past experiences. I'm too damaged to feel like I belong somewhere and I always end up thinking that outside of professional environments, I'm a burden and can't contribute anything worthwhile. Literally all I have is my career and my introverted hobbies and that's what I've been dedicating my life to. It just gets crippling when I realize that if I died tomorrow, only my parents would care. This came to be some years ago when I almost died in an accident and it traumatized me, mostly because I received zero to no sympathy from the people around me. I try not to think about it by drowning myself in my work, hobbies and escapism. Didn't think my life would turn out this way but it did, so I just have to make do like
>>434904 suggested. Just here for the ride and living for myself.
It's hard being this age because you're expected to stand on your own two feet and just deal with it. Reaching out is troublesome because I have a great career and some skills I've perfected over the years, so I'm often met with hostile envy which only contributes to my cynicism and indifference (You know, the "you can't have real problems" sorta stuff). I guess I just wanted to vent here because I don't have anywhere else to go and had to get it off my chest to see if anyone else felt the same way. First time I've vented about my life and it'll be the last, sorry to be such a sperg.
No. 435510
>>435383I always assume that the gossip threads are filled with men. Some of the comments are so fucking vile and insensitive (also nitpicky as fuck) that I can't really imagine a woman would write that. I mean, the possibility of course exists, but I also think men take advantage of the general bitterness of those threads to talk shit about the cows all they want, without nobody yelling them to go back to 4chan or whatever.
Mariah's thread in particular I'm pretty damn sure is full of guys who are bitter at the fact the can't fuck her, so they nitpick on every single physical thing they can to feel better about themselves.
Again, not saying every single comment is made by a man, but don't doubt they are writing the nastiest shit in those threads while we keep calling them "mean girls".
No. 435527
File: 1563320105747.jpeg (25.87 KB, 280x400, 1_-_tHEKNO-NAbeZZdwASKTA.jpeg)
I have no idea how the anons that are independent adults able to sustain relationships, hobbies anb jobs do it.
In theory I should be able to do those things, I'm fairly smart and not that autistic but it feels like whenever I get a minor set back, usual involving other people and social interactions/expectations, or get some negative vibes from the group I'm involved with at the time my whole world crumbles and I become an anxious mess unable to keep my routines and getting out of the bed, if I try really hard I end up getting a compulsion to hide inside bathrooms stalls or to run away from all.
It sucks, I've done therapy multiple times, taken meds, read self help books, tried keeping a journal and exploring my childhood traumas, yet I can't get out of this damn loop.
Shit, I'll be 27 in like three months and I have nothing, no friends, career, degree, gf/bf, and it's all my damn fault.
Some times I legit wonder if I have some sort of mental retardation because I've read about a lot of people that have worse traumas, history and Asperger's, and still manage to become somewhat functional. wtf
No. 435531
>>435518>Sounds more like insecure women shitting on other womenI think that's the case, especially when seeing how camwhore lolcows attract anons who brag about how much better of a camgirl they are, or the alt thread has those anons writing lengthy posts about how they're true goths.
It's a shame because those threads can have great milk and legit fun discussions when they're not a clit-measuring contest.
No. 435535
>>435518>Sounds more like insecure women shitting on other women to make themselves feel better. Momokun's thread has been outed before as being populated with rival cosplayers because they forgot to crop out their own profiles in screengrabs.
Dolly threads are full of camgirls who constantly boast about themselves and nitpick over other camgirls doing it wrong.
Pet YouTuber threads are full of pet hoarders who think they're veterinarians and experts.
Sh0e's thread is full of pickmes (Venti) or ex pickme cool girls who are mad that someone like Sh0e reached e-success with that persona.
The anorexic scumbag thread is full of "recovered" ED farmers or farmers with ongoing ED who try to medfag or blogpost out of experience.
I could go on. What's also really annoying is whenever any type of infrequent "outsider" makes a comment about the lolcows that doesn't fall in line with the typical nitpicks and insults, the farmers get supremely off-color and angry because they feel like you've interrupted their flow. It's
their cow.
No. 435545
>>435543Probably because the rejection of women would sting worse than the rejection by males, right?
It's okay anon. Just remember that everyone has insecurities and anxieties deep down. If lolcow should teach you anything it's that lots of farmers here struggle to make new female friends.
If you keep in mind that common ground, women seem a lot less intimidating. Got any hobbies you could branch out in?
No. 435566
>>435547I’m less nervous around men (beside when they act a certain way that
triggers trauma-based fear) because I guess I know I hold a certain kind of power as a woman? I.e. they wanna smash, young or old. Also society did a good job grooming me to play the charming flirty dumb bitch act.
Women tend to be intuitive and see right through the bullshit. So I feel more scrutinized because I feel like I wasn’t socialized to be in as tune with other women’s emotional needs… and worry I will accidentally come off like a bitch. I found it helpful to remind myself that most women aren’t evil bitches who are constantly trying to one-up, dominate and sabotage you. They’re also trying to gage you as well, that’s the awkward feeling we get sometimes. And those heavily afflicted with internalized misogyny make it obvious rather quickly and thus their approval is unneeded.
No. 435572
>>435547Men treat you like shit if they're not attracted to you
If they are, they basically worship the ground you walk on
No. 435620
File: 1563341788970.jpg (18.42 KB, 410x255, 5dfb77111ebc6208faa283b93279b8…)
All my friends, who are 25+ mind you, are fucking obessed with tiktok. I know i am being a no-fun-allow bitch, but i find the app incredibly childish. I wish the app fucking disappear. They are all so fucking cringy. I can't even watch them. You all are 25+ year old. Stop acting like teenager lip syncing to old memes. Your story time are worst on video then in person. What worse they exaggerate every story. Even the ones i was there.
No. 435626
How do I end my internalized misogyny
for a good chunk of my life I have had an extreme feeling of bitterness, frustration, and sometimes hatred towards my own gender. I have always had my trust most betrayed in my life by women. Lied to the most by women, and have been abused and bullied by women, including by my own mother when I was a child. Now the problem lies with my extreme desire for male acceptance even though I am well aware now how stupid it is. I have been through terrible situations with men,yet I still don’t have this wall around me when it comes to making relationships with other men. My father was in the picture,and was a good dad but was almost never home because of his job. I am bisexual, so dealing with this has always been a pain for that aspect as well. I hate how judgmental I become, and my male friends will often laugh at me for having so much distrust for other girls. I really want to fully call myself a feminist. I love hearing about strong, smart, and talented women conquering their fears and achieving their goals, yet I struggle to let any girls in my life get close to me. I’m always afraid of getting hurt or not being enough of a woman. A fear I had developed from other girls in my life calling me too masculine and a dyke. I overthink it so much, and makes me upset to tears that this is such a problem for me. I compliment girls daily on their talents, their looks, or just being awesome moms or pet owners or great at their job. Yet this hatred won’t leave my brain, and the male acceptance can sometimes affect the state of relationship with my current male partner. I haven’t made a true female friend since middle school, and that hurts just to say. I just want to know what I can do to try and make this disgusting part of me go away and move forward with the women trying to make the world better.
No. 435640
>>435624There are so many bi girls in heavy music scenes, even if you aren't finding them on tindr they exist, you'll find one eventually anon!
Make an effort to talk to people at gigs, try and go to see bands that have a lgbt fanbase such as smaller intersectional leaning punk bands if you can get into that, and if you can deal with it then maybe try and look a little stereotypically gay at those events. It's going to be harder to find girls without their wonderbread attachments at metal gigs, but if you find a girl at a more niche punk gig then you might still have enough musical crossover that she can come to those gigs with you in the future.
Side note but as a bi girl I can't imagine putting my music tastes on my tindr bio because it would just invite annoying guys to quiz me on being a poser
No. 435641
>>435637 Divorce?
Don't know what you are talking about.
I just want to vent about my adult frienss using a kid app.
No. 435648
I had my sleep interrupted with this dull aching chest pain and shortness of breath, and it's physically sickening, but I have no idea whether it's severe or not? It feels like hell and my chest feels horrible, I'm lying down and short of breath but I'm breathing, it's like this very dull but hellish heaviness in my chest that feels like pain
been experiencing cycling shortness of breath the entire day today (or should I say since yesterday evening), took aspirin at work to try and help it, it's not debilitating enough to be life threatening so going to the ER might be a waste of time / money… unfortunately I haven't gone to a practitioner doc in like 4 years and I have really no other resources to go to if this is an actual problem, am I just being a hypochondriac or what
I was off my psychological meds for 5 months, have been back on them for 5-7 weeks now with no symptoms, and never experienced reactions like this so I doubt it's my meds that are making me physically sick / short of breath, only one of them gives me physical symptoms and I don't take that one till tomorrow morning so it's definitely not that (my antidepressants that I take in the morning make me queasy, I take anti anxiety at morning and at night, mood stabilizer at night, the latter two never caused me any problems), I am currently on day 2 of my period but I doubt shortness of breath and chest pain is a symptom of that
I've had mild symptoms of asthma my entire life, never been an actual asthmatic, sometimes I have terrible allergies and shortness of breath that strains my voice but nothing that's ever given me this intensity of chest pain. like I said I was experiencing it yesterday during work no less and it dulled my voice down a lot, took two aspirins, inhaled some smelly herbal stuff to try and clear out any allergy blockage, that worked temporarily, and now that I've woken up at like 3am it seems to be back and even more relentless.
I'm fucking retarded for venting wondering what could be causing this chest pain, at what point should I drag myself to some kind of doctor, at what point does it become an issue I wonder. Maybe I'll just end up fucking dying or maybe it will dissipate and never be an issue again after tonight
No. 435659
>>435652I've had abnormal sleep interruptions without chest pain for weeks on and off (sometimes they happen, sometimes they'd don't) because I have been trying to alter my sleep schedule after staying up till 3-5am for the five months when I was off my meds, and it's been hell, but this is the first time I've experienced chest pain and shortness of breath after waking up (it's gottten a bit better since I posted but it's still uncomfortable). I've been in a new environment for weeks now and I don't think there's any excuse for me to be experiencing this that isn't medical, completely separate from all my issues at hand I've had people tell me over the course of yesterday that it could be anxiety induced, but there's no reason anxiety would be making it pop up twice in the span of less than 24hrs like this. If I've been regularly taking my meds again for 5-7 weeks it makes no sense for this to be induced by them and it makes no sense that it would happen at two unrelated points in the day (evening and very early morning) or stress, I've had moments of very high stress on some days in the last 3-5 weeks and nothing like this has ever occurred before recently… ofc I have the right to be scared
Not sure it'll help, since right now we don't get along the best (dealing with internal family drama that was spurred on by me moving out of my dads house and into my moms after an incident happened and my dad completely shattered 5 years of trust he'd built up in me, it fucking depresses me to think about) but i will tell my mother tomorrow about this and tell her I might need to make an appointment with some kind of doc/clinic even though I don't have a general practitioner right now, this isn't normal and I'm not going to hide it no matter how much I hope it kills me, there's a lot of things I need to resolve and hiding my problems only tends to make them worse so might as well admit something is wrong while it's happening… or it will be too late and go unchecked and the last time that happened, it didn't end well
thanks for your concerns, I'm going to try and get back to sleep now and see if it's still there when I wake up
No. 435662
>>435659Stay safe, anon. You know what you have to do. I don't know what country you're in (assuming America bc it's night here and you mentioned hospital costs lel), but if you think it stems from a physical issue, don't let your physician tell you the problem is stemming from mental issues, and don't let them keep turning your attention away from your physical pain because you're dealing with mental stuff. You're there for one specific thing and you're already being treated for your mental health so your physician should not be so focused on that. Don't answer the bullshit depression questionnaire if you don't have to.
Just speaking from personal experience. Went in for gastrointestinal pains once and my doctor ended up wanting to admit me in a ward for my depression. Ridiculous.
No. 435663
File: 1563354107648.jpg (179.52 KB, 1215x1018, 6xuaajkpkul21.jpg)
while i used to feel shittier in the past and more self conscious,now that im feeling better im loosing hope that i will truly be understood by anyone.i feel like i cant be truly honest because i will either be judged or the others will take my words too personally.i know i have no place to judge people,but having gone through a bunch of therapy and introspection,i see how blind others are to how they truly are and their issues.i spent most of my life being borderline agoraphobic and i barely have friends and the few i have now seem to be drifting away because i relate to them less and less or they have other more important people in their lives.whenever i try to do something better for myself,i feel as if i should have expectations of myself i will never achieve and i feel burdened and pressured so i give up.there are times i have hope for the future but at other times i feel that nothing will get better and that we all are truly alone in the end
the image is taken from reddit and is slightly modified by me.we need more doomerette memes man
No. 435670
File: 1563355821526.jpg (41.92 KB, 300x300, doomerette.jpg)
>>435666the depths of my soul,fellow doomerette anon
No. 435688
File: 1563361287268.jpg (26.05 KB, 303x294, IMG_0203.JPG)
>>435663This entire post could've been written by me tbh; you summarized it all perfectly.
Hope you'll feel at least a bit better knowing you're
really not the only one feeling like this.
No. 435695
File: 1563363900449.jpg (35.94 KB, 704x396, 1562021786969.jpg)
>Upstairs neighbor will bitch if anyone sneezes in the hallways.
>I live right under his apartment.
>He moves heavy shit around his apartment at 7AM.
>His grandchildren gallop around his apartment like draft horses.
>He slams doors like he is trying to break the door frames.
>Seriously beginning to tinfoil about what the eff he keeps dragging around on the floor at 7AM so often!?!?!!
No. 435737
>>435711That's stupid but doesn't make you a bold racist. And neither does it make non-English speakers unsafe. Isn't your official language English?
I never sympathized with Americans complaining about foreigners/mexicans, but since witnessing the situation first hand I kind of understand them. Tourists learn English, travel to the US, and then get people serving them who can't or can barely speak English? Wtf? Makes you feel dumbfounded lol
No. 435771
>>434944I forgot I wrote that post but coming back and finding your reply makes me want to cry. Hang in there, kiddo. I'm proud of you.
Completely cutting someone out of your life is also a very
valid way to deal with the trauma, too. I do live in fear of what will happen when my parents die and I may have to confront the person who abused me but then I remember that I can just talk to him through a lawyer. I haven't had any form of contact with that subhuman scum for 6 or 7 years now and every single extra day added to that number feels like a fucking achievement.
No. 435800
>>435004I feel like that but I also actually do feel like a doormat. I've noticed that I attract people like that too, maybe it's cause I'm too caring and I just attract the opposite.
I feel like I'm no one's priority really and when I'm with them it feels like they don't care that I'm there and when I do treat them the way they treat me suddenly I become the asshole. I don't know why…maybe i need to reflect on my personality or maybe I need new people around me.
>>435050I wish I could help you anon cause mine hits its peak too on some days. Distract yourself, go out and don't be alone for too long.
No. 435825
>>435737>Isn't your official language English?Don't think so. It is de-facto, not officially.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/govbeat/wp/2014/08/12/states-where-english-is-the-official-language/ Some states have an official language. I don't think it's a big deal that forms and phone menus have multiple languages because not everyone is a US citizen who speaks fluent English and may be more comfortable in their first language. Our immigration program doesn't require you to speak English and that's part of it, and if you're a refugee you may not even have time or resources, think about the massive amount of Vietnamese who emigrated. It's better to minimize potential mistakes on long, confusing forms so they don't have to be corrected later, politics aside. Some forms are confusing to a native English speaker to begin with.
Also, the entire Southwest is full of Spanish speakers because we have tons of seasonal workers and recent immigrants/visitors, and you could argue that parts of it were majority Spanish speakers or bilingual only ~150 years ago or less. Back then it was the Americans who were refusing to speak the official language lol
Besides that tbh many tourists don't bother learning English unless they learned in school. Mostly Europeans bother and that's easier than going Mandarin->English, plus many of you seem to do self-study to communicate on the English web if you don't study in school. I knew some Chinese monks who had moved here to teach as part of their organization and they were making a great effort to learn English, but in the meantime, they were still working on fluency, I can't blame them for preferring to do some stuff in their native language or if they want to continue using it so they don't lose it.
No. 435827
>>435824>the asexuals are at it againlike we are one entity making decisions all together, unable to have different opinions. you sound like a fearmongering christian. tumblr is just a website, it wont hurt you
>big victim mentalityit's probably going to shock you but… asexuals can be in gay relationships and therefore be oppressed. yes, it might be hard for you to understand that you can love someone without caring only about their genitals but it does exist. probably going to get a lot of shit by some angry lesbians but whatever
No. 435832
>>435824Jesus fucking christ I can't believe this. There is literally no proof that a.) she was an asexual, b.) she was killed because she told the guy that "I'm asexual". She was killed because the guy was obsessing over her and she rejected him while sleeping around with other guys and getting attention from them. It was about
toxic masculinity, misogyny and untreated mental illnesses. How fucking attention hungry do these ~ace activists~ have to be to act like they're oppressed? Will they start claiming that holocaust was about aphobia because some of the jews could've been asexual? Lord have mercy.
>>435827Please fuck off summerfag.
>asexuals can be in gay relationships and therefore be oppressed. They would be oppressed for being gay then, not asexual. Are you baiting or just phenomenally retarded?
No. 435834
File: 1563383801246.png (365.96 KB, 1536x1734, IMG_0206.PNG)
>>435824Reminds me of this post I saw on Reddit yesterday
No. 435837
>>435835thats why i said we DONT think all the same, headass. murder and using someones death for your own gain is bad, no shit sherlock
>>435832so asexuals CAN be oppressed, just not for being asexual, but everyone else keeps saying the opposite. wtf this is next level gaslighting.
No. 435844
>>435841you stupid clown I'll walk you through this step by step
first off if you're inbred enough to believe asexuality is a "sexual orientation" and someone claims to be an asexual homosexual, they're not oppressed for being asexual
they're oppressed for being homosexual, not for being asexual
simply being asexual doesn't expose you to oppression
you can't say "Asexuals can be oppressed too!!" and then add a "only if they're gay" disclaimer because in this case the oppression has nothing to do with them being asexual
stop being intentionally dumb you retarded fuck and take your ~ace/aro~ snowflake bullshit out of here immediately
No. 435846
>>435844learn how to read. yes, it's not a sexual orientation, it's a lack of sexual attraction just like atheism isnt a religion. and no, ill gladly stay if i want to. can't believe that people not having sex can bother so many people lmao
>>435840honestly i was going to write a paragraph explaining it but im tired so just google it if you are actually interested in learning and not just insulting for no reason at all
No. 435850
File: 1563385801789.png (67.6 KB, 1562x440, tl.png)
>>435824She literally said on her Tellonym that she was bi. If anything, this is a biphobic hate crime, since the last thing she did was kiss a female friend and text her that she was stoned and wanted to fuck her, and the guy who saw them kiss got mad and killed her out of jealousy.
Just…where is this shit coming from?
No. 435874
File: 1563389639684.jpg (57.04 KB, 488x650, 1548547808801.jpg)
Happy vent time:
Me and my abusive (now-ex) boyfriend broke up. I have posted about him in these vent threads multiple times, and all you girls told me to leave him.
He was the one who left me, basically because "I wasn't good enough" for him. I was absolutely heartbroken at first, I thought my entire life was over.
It's been about 2 weeks. I have never been happier.
I feel so free, I don't feel controlled, I feel comfortable, I feel safe, I don't go to sleep every night in fear, I get more time to do the things I love (especially drawing), and it's just amazing. I met an amazing man who I've got a huge crush on and he is 100% my type and makes me happy every time we talk, unlike my ex. I'm starting college soon and though I have doubts about my major, I feel motivated that I'll be able to make good friends and connections at college, something that I lacked while with my ex as he didn't allow me to have friends.
I feel like a whole new person. I'm finally happy. After all of these years, I'm finally happy with myself.
No. 435905
>>435891Fear of missing out anon; I have it too.
Our culture heavily pressures us to build some sort or "resume or accomplishments." Subconsciously, social media and advertising affect us as well. When you're constantly around photos and people bragging about their life, it can really make you over-reflect on your own, as if you're not doing something right. In my experience, these photos and what people talk about are overly exaggerated. There are some great moments at parties, but you'll spend a lot of time wandering around awkwardly. Vacations are fun, but ultimately you're just visiting temples and kebab stands, no different than a church and Starbucks, just different cultures. There's a lot of numb in-between time we don't account for. Can't blame yourself for that. If you enjoyed your trips and parties, that's all that matters.
I'm in my 20's, and have only been to Vegas. Couldn't gamble or see shows because I was too young at the time. I've never partied either, only been dragged around to the ones my mom went to when I was a child, and knew they'd never be for me. I spend most days indoors or just going for walks in the desert I live. I feel like I'm having a quarter life crisis when I compare myself to people who have a list of experiences like you do. It's all relative. Someone else's life always seems more exciting. If there's something you want to do you feel you're missing out on, just push yourself as hard as you can to obtain it. There's no point in ruminating on it.
No. 435920
>>435891i think everything
>>435905 wrote hit the nail on the head. i also think it's easy to believe that other people are doing way more exciting things than you, even though that rarely is the case. most people in their 20s probably feel the way you do, so you are not alone! even though i have a good "accomplishments resume", i have been depressed since forever and felt no joy when making those accomplishments.
No. 435936
>>435891Anon, my mother always used to say to me, don't compare your outtakes to other people's greatest hits.
The truth is everyone else is doing their best to show you their best side, and make it look like their lives are easy and exciting, with no boring or difficult bits. People probably look at you and think "Wow, anon's so cool. She looks so young, she's been to India, she's partied, and what have I done? Just sat in my house, dehydrating slowly. I suck." Then they post a heavily filtered photo that they took 45 times to get a good angle and caption it with something about how they're got SO much planned for the weekend.
The truth is we just don't know the lowest lows of other people's lives, or the mundane boring bits they don't think it's worth sharing.
No. 435940
>>435891I'm a person who goes out and does a lot of "exciting" things. but everyone thinks I basically go home and lie in a deprivation tank because I don't post any of it on social media. So.
Your life is what you make it. I'm doing all the things I've always wanted to do.
No. 435942
>>435891Don't worry anon, I can guarantee at least some of us do absolutely nothing. I've never partied, traveled as an adult, or done one (1) single substance. I also don't plan to do anything conventionally fun either, it's not for me.
Think of losers like me when you feel boring. We're out here.
No. 435946
>>435942Same here. I've never even left my own country.
I want to, I would love to travel. But when I have the money I don't have the time and when I have the time I don't have the money.
No. 435947
>>435753You might have schizoaffective disorder.
>>435383Anon you have to remember that people who frequently use an anonymous imageboard are probably not the most well adjusted people mentally. And anonymity brings out the absolute worst in people and they say things they would never say in real life. That's just the way people are.
I agree with the other poster, I think you would like reddit more.
No. 436010
>>435991 >>435985
Honestly realized that while I was posting lmfaooo thank you for holding me accountable anons hopefully she didn’t hear the stupid bitch part lmfao. I’mma still open the door for people even if they don’t say thank you because you can’t expect anything from anyone lol
No. 436018
>>435994>So, I'm fucked and will have to financially support my mom really soon for God knows how many decades. I don't even love her, I only feel a sense of responsibility and she for sure will never be thankful for anything I get her…If your mom never cultivated a positive relationship with you and is
toxic then you don't owe her anything. Many so-called parents from the generation before ours literally had kids out of expectation that we would be their personal slaves for their old age. Except many forgot the part about actually being responsible and nice towards their children for that sense of obligation to be warranted in kind.
I don't care if I get written out of my mom's will, any material possessions she'd leave behind wouldn't be worth the further years of emotional abuse, frustrations, and gaslighting.
No. 436036
I really wish everyone was asexual, but still be able to reproduce (like machines or something, idk). Life would be so much easier. Maybe we should all castrate ourselves (especially males) in the future, like in that Futurama episode. There would be no rape, no abortion/trans debate, no teenage pregnancy, no STIS, etc. Plus, people make mundane things so sexual for no reason (like eating a banana or an ice cream, gagging, skimpy clothes) and it bothers me. I wonder if someone feels the same way or I'm just crazy
No. 436059
>>436036I'm high libido and I feel the same deep down. If I could make myself and everyone else asexual I'd do it.
I'd want to keep romantic feelings though, I think cuddling and kissing a single life partner would be nice to keep around.
No. 436093
File: 1563424464200.jpg (45.71 KB, 800x534, What.jpg)
>>436092>"Why do white people travel in packs" What does that even mean??
No. 436097
>>436092I'm not arguing what you said but a lot things said about China in general should be met with a healthy dose of skepticism especially in regards to Uighyur camps. The media is very anti-China right now due to trade wars.
But I agree, a lot of Chinese Canadians (since I'm canadian) are weirdly defensive of the CCP despite being otherwise kind and rational people, or outright SJWs. It's a weird dissonance.
No. 436100
My boyfriend uses ASMR audios on youtube to relax after long days at work…
I want to explain but because I don’t just want people telling me to dump him, I hate how that’s the only answer people give. The thing is that he really isn’t what you think, there’s a reason why I was attracted to him in the first place, he’s not a fake nice guy or emotionally unstable or anything, he’s actually the opposite of the stereotype you picture when you think of asmr. He’s a tradesman, he plays rugby football, and he has plenty of his own friends. I’m not trying to prove anything, I just mean he’s not like the incel temperament. Like I’ve never had to mother him and he’s always been so independent so that’s why it caught me off guard.
I found out because I walked into our back room the other day where we keep our PS4 and I saw him playing Destiny with his headphones on. I thought it was funny because his eyes were a little foggy and droopy and he really was zonked out of his mind. He looks like he had taken some heavy pills or something Usually he just listens to music to calm down, he has long 10 hour days a lot of the time, so seeing this is pretty common but when I picked up the phone to say what was making him so entranced I saw a pretty girls face up on the screen.
It broke my heart at the time because I had to think that why wouldn’t he come to me with this sort of thing? He said it was when he was so stressed he just uses it to get those tingles down your spine which put him to sleep and he said the combination of that with a shooter fps just makes him not have to think at all. When I tried to say Why doesn’t he come to me for relaxation? He said that I was mistaking the asmr video for any intimacy and that it was just a mechanical fact that putting on high quality head phones and listening to one of those videos is the best method to trigger his body to relax. I kind of get what he means, and I went through his history a bit later on to check and he is not watching any sexualized videos or anything weird, it really is just stuff like fake haircuts, fingernails on wood and whispering. He likes GentleWhispering who I looked up and she seems like a normal person not anything gross.
Typing this whole thing out I realise there’s probably nothing there. I was trying to be as honest as I could be to get the worst parts out but there’s nothing bad to say I guess. But it just makes me feel so sick in the stomach when he’s stressed that he turns to a virtual product rather than me, who really does care. Should I ask him not to use it anymore?
No. 436109
>>436100You're being way too paranoid and unnecessary jealous. Him listening to ASMR is like getting a massage, it's what a lot of people use for relaxing because of the outright physical reaction it causes their brains to
trigger.
>When I tried to say Why doesn’t he come to me for relaxation?This honestly sounds sort of suffocating. You can't expect to fulfill your partner's every single need and a healthy relationship allows people to find a life and interests outside of their significant other. If he got hungry and ordered some takeaway, would you be mad that he didn't ask you to make food first?
No. 436110
>>436109This. I mean, unless you want to give him a massage or scratch his head while he plays a game he's not going to get the same kind of relaxation that he gets from ASMR (and if you're this worked up over it that you're snooping through his phone, you frankly don't sound like a particularly relaxing person to be around). I like listening to it too while I zone out on games after a long day, it's super relaxing and I don't have to pay a masseuse or ask my husband to drop what he's doing to make me comfortable.
You're definitely making a big deal out of nothing. As long as he doesn't listen to pornographic ones who cares. GentleWhispering is like the most mainstream normie ASMRtist, too.
No. 436111
>>436100I wouldn't worry too much anon, his viewing history seems innocent. I understand how you feel though.
If asmr relaxes him, there's no doubt in my mind that he would love a massage. Maybe give him one after work, while he's playing games, etc.
No. 436132
>>436118I'd say that if you've tried to help them but they won't listen, you should take care of yourself first and foremost.
If you can't help them or don't have the strength to, take care of yourself first too.
No. 436134
>>436100I love GentleWhispering, because she gives really nice mom vibes (she just had a daughter so ofc) and it's a good way to completely check out of reality and not focus on anything. As I type this I have a video on for simple background noise after a bad day.
He's only listening to normal things, it's not like he's going after porn ASMR Roleplays. He's done nothing wrong IMO, he's using background noise for relaxation like people would when leaving a TV on while they do the dishes. Don't take it personally, if ASMR helps him relax then you can't really replicate it since it's just mental white noise.
No. 436154
>>436150I'm really sorry that happened! I think it's even worse than my complaint because this is someone you followed for a very long time and believed them to be someone else.
I don't think she's given up a fight though, she most likely wasn't a lesbian to start with (or even a man-hating woman). It sucks that you had to find out after ten long years.
No. 436266
>>436255Reading this makes me cringe. I hope she'll learn to stop doing that shit.
My family isn't poor, but I was left on my own a lot growing up. The only food there was was leftovers or instant noodles, because I didn't really learn how to cook/didn't know how to prioritize my allowance until I was a bit older. I'm never really hungry nowadays but I always fear that I will be, and I truly hate being so wasteful with my money and food.
No. 436327
>>436320Good luck anon! I hope you'll have a fun time. I missed my friends and family like crazy but I videochatted with them often and it was really cute to always leave each other messages that we knew we would see when we woke up. We sent a lot of pics and updates of our lives. I was so lonely at one point that a friend and I called each other while visiting each other's towns in animal crossing: new leaf and going on an outing together like we would irl. It was cute.
Where are you going specifically, if you don't mind me asking?
No. 436333
>>436327thank you anon! i'm going to be staying in Kyoto this timeeee! The truth is that the fist time i went i had another bf but our relationship was pretty bad so i wasn't lonely or anything, also i went (and go now) to visit a friend. This time i'm in love and i'm loved back, our relationship has a lot of
hugging and cuddling all day so it makes me feel lonely even before it happens. I know i'll be too busy to care when i'm there but i feel a little bad.
No. 436336
>>436333Have fun there!! I only got to visit Kyoto once, I want to go back so bad! If you're in the area, there's a little ice cream stand nearby Fushimi Inari, apparently they're very well known for their tofu ice cream that's so thick you can hold it upside down and it won't fall out! I would recommend it if you can find it (the stall has a cloth banner of an old man holding the ice cream upside down haha)!
Happy to hear you've found yourself a much better relationship. Before you know it, you'll be back in each other's arms! A little distance makes the heart grow fonder, or whatever that saying is.
No. 436348
File: 1563485814977.jpg (39.21 KB, 500x276, 1555972178096.jpg)
>family planned to celebrate the fact that I graduated with a master's degree
>they invite aunts, uncles and cousins without telling me
>even though they're all gossip hens that talk shit behind our backs and one of them is a disgusting, smelling alcoholic
>mother is urging me to gtfo of the house and won't stop insulting me because I'm not working yet even though I want to relax for the first time in my life but won't admit that the reason why I'm still there and I had to redo a year was because I couldn't study what I wanted or where I wanted, and I always planned on going abroad thanks to an exchange program and she and my greedy father told me at the last minute that they'll never help me with anything, so I have way less opportunities than I planned
>at the time I only asked them to vouch for me at the bank so I could get a student loan and they still act like I'm a snake who wants to steal their money even though they promised me they'll always help me with that
>they're so retarded, uneducated and in denial that they claim that I can just go to the destination of my choice for a week for holidays and immediately find an office job there
>was always asked for money when I was getting a tiny scholarship or when I was working but making way less than minimum wage, which I didn't do because that was just impossible
>was always guilt-tripped anytime I bought anything because that was money I could have given to my parents according to them
>was my little sister's babysitter for free for years because we're family so obviously I can't decide to spend my first years of college for my own social life or to work
>suddenly don't want to celebrate with anyone anymore when I remember they were sabotaging me since forever
No. 436401
>>436393I'm trying but tiny apartments are expensive so I need to stay with my family until I save a bit more money and find a nice, not too expensive place. I've been thinking about the money I'll need if I have to find a place with no furniture yet and saved accordingly but if an emergency happened I'd be left with no money.
My parents don't understand that because they're from that generation when you didn't even need to have a middle school degree to have interesting job opportunities as long as you learned a trade by yourself. Because of documents asked by owners I'll have to deal with my parents even after finding a place anyway.
No. 436408
File: 1563497944398.jpg (75.74 KB, 400x400, ah..jpg)
i'm so tired of being depressed. i thought things were getting better, but i guess i was just deluding myself as a cope. my grandparents, the only two people who genuinely cared about me, died last year and idk how to mentally & emotionally move on from it. even though i've accomplished more than i ever imagined in the last couple of years, i don't feel happier.
i still feel absolutely terrible, even after 5 years of therapy and medication. whenever i accomplish something i just think "my grandparents would have been so proud, but they'll never know so what's the point really". objectively, most aspects of my life are great, but i can't seem to appreciate them. they make living easier, but don't bring genuine joy or happiness. this is such a cliche, but everyone assumes i'm happy because i act carefree as my dumb brain prevents me from showing genuine emotions or be vulnerable.
if it weren't for my brothers i would an heroed a long time ago. lol i guess i had some sort of relapse as i really want to cut myself, something i haven't done since 2015. i won't though as they'll leave scars and i have some sort of image to uphold i guess. this is ironic, as i was planning to get my old scars tattooed over because i thought i finally had gotten "healthy" or "stable".
No. 436440
>>436094>And coming from a Chinese person…? There's no race known more for traveling in tour groups.My cousin isn't interested in Chinese people or culture very much so she wouldn't know that lmao
>>436097I mean there has been plenty of criticism of China since before the trade war.
Most Chinese international students are very defensive of the CCP. But my cousin isn't coming from that angle. She's just concerned about American racism.
No. 436444
>>436430I'm that anon and yes I do, I hope you're right
>>436429that sucks, I'm sorry to hear that. this is the kind of thing I keep hearing about. I hope CEOs at the top start losing their jobs honestly
>>436431you're probably right but I'm scared of people and don't have very good people skills
>>436442I'm not sure what networking is but I've been trying to teach myself SQL and python from youtube videos and books and I'm still confused
No. 436445
>>436425One of the few things that robots won’t typically be able to replace is a human connection
Customer service jobs won’t fully be replaced, so if you really want secure job, try nursing school or psychiatry
No. 436451
>>436444Networking is the way devices connect and communicate with each other. There are lots of intangible facets of IT that don’t get mentioned as much as “coding” and stuff like that that are worth looking into and will be more relevant as tech advances.
Getting into tech or health/humanities (as other anons mentioned) is definitely the way to go if you’re having a serious existential crisis about this.
No. 436456
>>436451>>436445thanks. I've been thinking about nursing/something medical, maybe even going to a trade school for it instead of a traditional university
>>436451that's interesting, I've never heard of that. I'll look it up. usually when I hear "networking" it means social networking.
No. 436491
File: 1563509125193.jpeg (60.8 KB, 526x326, 646161CA-4C08-466F-ABC4-9EE9EB…)
Idk why I seem to relate too well with the depressed Anons in this thread..
Honestly starting to tear up
No. 436504
File: 1563511459225.gif (189.23 KB, 500x375, 0E398324-DCCB-4BC1-A882-E2E3AE…)
Every time I see an “e-girl” who makes hella bank on doing nothing I’m reassured by the fact that I haven’t sold my life to the threat of having a stalker for the rest of my life.
No. 436519
File: 1563514865656.jpg (21.65 KB, 530x530, 1563084581814.jpg)
My abusive mother just screamed at me all day again. She says that I'm pathetic for a 20 year old and that I should be an adult. She physically and mentally abused me throughout my entire life and asks me why I'm so fucked up. I'm not doing bad. I'm in my first choice university. I'm sleeping well. I'm eating good and losing weight (which she says I'm an anorexic and making drama because my life is too easy and boring). She's fucking homeless living on MY couch and has the audacity to call me fucking pathetic? Fuck you. I'm not an adult just because I keep a few mugs at my PC? That's so fucking god awful compared to being homeless? I don't know whether I feel any pity for her. She did this to me. She did this to herself.
No. 436535
File: 1563523058665.jpg (59.94 KB, 613x569, bathwater.JPG)
>>436504I was just about to come to post about this exact same thing. This retarded tweet is making rounds within the ~woke~ circles and of fucking course male feminist snakes are spreading it and acting like Belle Delphine is a respectable businesswoman and a marketing genius even though there's most likely the guy who partially owns her business feeding her ideas. Bitch even sold nudes that weren't her own and were provided to her by a male companion, just to buy a vanity trip. I know wageslaving is a meme but at least my basic ass 40 hour job isn't based on exploiting people's loneliness and my self-worth, endangering my own safety or placing constant pressure on myself to post on social media and feeding my crazy obsessed fans. My job isn't making a bank on feeding misogynistic males' already awful opinion on women. After my working day is over, I can leave for home without thinking about how I had to pretend to be someone's loli girlfriend on snapchat and stick a dildo up my ass.
I can't even say that I "respect" Belle for "making such a large amount of money". Her money is rotten and ill-gotten to me. She's setting an example to younger girls about how this is the thing they should go for to be respected and get lots of money. The chances of some thot making it that far in an already oversaturated market is like 1 in 100 000, so we'll just end up with a lot of broken girls ruining their reputation and selling themselves out to thirsty men over nothing.
No. 436554
>>436551I know it's anti feminist and you're not suppose to say shit about all women but when I grew up in early 90s/00s in UK I would often hear mothers tell their daughter to get a baby and a house off the government when they were 18. I reckon these are the same types of girls that just want to take their clothes off for money. Why work when you can just be a woman and everyone else looks after you?
I have no respect for any sex workers hustling. Imo you're all tramps.
No. 436566
>>436511proud of u anon, escaping neetdom is amazing & you're doing great, keep at it!!
glad it's a fun job too, not many people can say that.
No. 436570
>>436549This was me.
I'm a CSA
victim who was also groomed by anime idiots who told me acting like a cute slutty lewd loli was sooo adorable when i was a young teenager, i got into sexwork and camming by 15 to 18, people knew I was underage and lived for it.
I do think sexwork is
valid, however, but so many minors get into it it's sick. Attention can quickly become an addiction and honestly, I think it should be viewed like drug or alcohol addiction..
No. 436575
File: 1563533847709.jpg (49.79 KB, 750x735, FB_IMG_1562497525756.jpg)
>new starter at work
>all managers are away
>this is week 2 and consequently she's not been set up on any of systems yet
>use my work time to try and get rights and accounts set up for her
>I have no idea what I'm doing
>feel bad for her basically being left to fend for herself
>offer to get into work earlier than my shift to try and answer any questions she might have or give her more guidance
>oh I didn't realise you'd get here so early
>bitch I said this yesterday and you agreed to it
>not even thanked for setting up the accesses I managed to when it's not even my fucking responsibility
Fuck this old biddy. This is my own fault for doing stuff that isn't my job and going beyond my pay grade but still. You're not getting anything more of my time in future unless I'm being paid for it.
No. 436579
>>436519thank god you still know your worth after her shitty treatment, dont let her take that from you
sounds like you're doing great and she's miserable and jealous
also, threaten to throw her out next time she throws a fit
No. 436581
I'm honestly on the verge of prostituting myself until I get money for implants or just straight up killing myself
I'm a 32D, you'd think this would be good enough but nope, anytime a conversation about breasts pops about people almost ALWAYS have to tell me I have no tits, my tits are so small, etc. If I don't wear a push up bra I get constant comments on how small my tits are, I had like 3 guys I've dated straight up emotionally abuse me over my breast size, that including comparing me to their ex girlfriends and telling me how I was worthless and a disappointment, one going on their way and trying to blackmail me into getting implants, and another insulting my body while having sex with me because apparently my tits are too small
I can't stand this, I didn't even know my perfectly normal breast size would cause this much problems for anyone I'm with, I just want to enjoy myself and be happy but it seems like everyone I'm with I just make miserable because of my body, my current boyfriend tells me I'm perfect and my boobs are a perfect size but I honestly don't believe I will ever believe him, I just want to distance myself from everyone and put everyone out of misery if my boobs are this awful to some people and cause so much of a bother
No. 436587
>>436581Anon, implants aren't worth it. The scars don't fully fade, you need to get them replaced every few years because they grow old, and even then there's a chance they'll give you an infection. Your health isn't worth potentially compromising just so that some retarded males can stop insulting your tits.
Also, if your tits were perfect, they'd just find another body part to criticise. People who enjoy scrutinising women's bodies will always find something to nitpick on, they'll outright invent flaws if they have to.
No. 436590
File: 1563538954866.jpg (26.03 KB, 398x402, funnycat.jpg)
My place is infested with ticks because my dog randomly walked into a nest and brought like 300 of them inside and I've had the exterminator come on two separate occasions, used like 6 tick bombs and I'm still finding ticks everywhere. Should I just light my place on fire? I don't think there's any coming back. They've claimed the land as their own.
No. 436593
File: 1563539936880.jpg (154.46 KB, 1280x720, SadKeanu.jpg)
The guy that I've been going on dates with came to my apartment last night to hang out and sleep over. This is after he blew me off last Saturday.
For one he got here super late at almost 8pm when he originally said he'd be here no later than 7pm so we could go swim before the pool closes. After we went to get dinner we had sex and were cuddling on my bed when he reveals that he doesn't actually want to sleep over and should go home. When I asked why, he first made the excuse that he booked a tutoring session with a student early the next morning so he didn't want to be grumpy from having to commute to work at 9am. Yet I've slept over at his place when I had work the next morning and had to get up as early as 4am. It was a weak excuse and I was mad. When I pressed him more he said that he actually has anxiety and never sleeps when he stays over at other people's houses and told me some really pathetic stories from his childhood about it. He didn't know why he told me he would sleep over here when he didn't mean it other than he was feeling guilty for being a jerk about blowing me off last Saturday. So I guess his male poo brain thought it was good to lie to me further, temporarily.
Then he explained why he blew me off last Saturday and–in short–he had a shitfit because he promised to look after someone's dog and forgot to catch up on school paperwork in addition to promising me to hang out. The responsibilities just pushed his anxious male brain over the edge with overwhelm. So he wound up sleeping and being upset in his apartment all day. He did not wind up watching the dog, did not wind up seeing me, and I don't believe he did the work. Just sulked into his bad headspace while screaming into pillows. It was a long tirade about how he just promises so much for other people but how he just needed to be by himself.
It's frustrating to see someone like this in his late 20s.
I don't understand introverts and their anxiety. To me it just looks juvenile. This isn't who I needed in a date. I wanted someone who actually loves spending time with me and would do so every minute if he could. Once again, I've put time and energy into someone who turns out to disappoint me.
But men are deceitful and purposefully lure women in by omitting all their drastic character flaws until later. He knows no women would date him if they knew the truth about his behavior right off the bat.
No. 436599
>>436589>>436591I live in an obese area so people are so use to seeing insanely large breasts that perfectly normal ones are flat
I know I know, people are shitty, but I don't ever remember it being this bad, I am just honestly so confused as to why so many people are obsessed with body shaming me and if they do this to everyone else
No. 436602
>>436599Not sure about your exes (they were probably just garbage, good riddance), but perhaps others do it to intentionally bring you down? Especially if they're obese themselves.
idk, I also live in a fat area but have never had my A-Cups picked on. Although that could be because I accidentally give off threatening vibes. If you come off as kind/soft people may see that as an in to shame the pretty girl.
No. 436606
>>436599>I live in an obese areaBecause men, even the fat Peter Griffins of the manosphere, are known for pining after fat women and their breasts.
It's because you're dating shallow men sis. Can't blame the fatties for this one.
No. 436614
>>436599Eww girl, do you really want to be having sex with guys that demand you have excessively big tits. Do any of these wankers have big dicks or any amazing handsome sexy features or are they all average edgelords?
From my own personal experience the only douchebags that ever felt the need to criticise my appearance had small dicks, were short or had none of the socially desirable traits. One guy pined after me for years, sent my mixtapes, always offered emotional support while I dated other guys. We eventually hooked up and he acted so entitled and would tell me how to look better and what I thought was him admiring me one night he suddenly snapped "I never noticed you had a crooked tooth.." it was dripping in disdain. Like a crooked tooth. Homeboy hadn't been able to make me orgasm with his pencil dick but here he was obsessing over my tooth.
Insecure men are the worst.
No. 436626
>>436535This is well put together anon, thank you for that. I'm afraid to express the exact opinion because it always boils down to me and other women being jealous of a younger girl making lots of money when it's not the case.
I really wish there was a non-misogynistic, non-religious institution that could provide some moral guidance to the youth, both boys and girls, when so many parents fail at doing so.
No. 436652
>>436535I used to be so jealous of camgirls. I wanted the constant stream of validation and money they were making, the ability to do minimal work for maximum comfort. My first encounter was with Charms, but honestly lolcow has helped me see that that sort of life is nothing but trouble. It's not sustainable in the long run, you risk everything because these degenerates don't know where or when to stop (or plain just don't care) and view you as a piece of meat, and honestly I haven't seen or met a camgirl who is completely right in her head.
When I look at Belle, I'm undeniably jealous of her looks and the bank she makes, but at the same time she's really off putting because of it. Someone up on this thread or another thread talked about how they don't truly like her because she likes anime or games. They don't give a flying fuck about her interests, her personality, or really anything about her outside of her face; she's nothing but a piece of meat to them- and that shit hit me hard. What's validation when someone doesn't even give a fuck about you as a person? How sad it must feel to know that no one truly cares about you or your interests.
My basic bitch minimum wage job might not pay me 1% of what Belle earns, but the comfort of knowing that my earnings won't completely diminish to zero tomorrow when some new, cuter bitch rolls around is good enough. I've longed learn that the sort of validation these men give to girls like Belle is as meaningless as their existence.
Anyway thanks for keeping me sane and not feeling awful about my life, lolcow.
No. 436665
File: 1563549983532.jpg (20.64 KB, 640x407, 1560028133728.jpg)
>>436652Most of us who've ever considered camming but backed down wanted to make bank like Belle but realized we'd end up like Charms. Lmao.
No. 436673
File: 1563551006407.jpg (137.34 KB, 1055x1496, D_xWwedUEAEATp0.jpg)
>>436664When I saw this, I realized that the reason they're doing this is that to some American people, "Orange Man Bad" really IS more important than anything in the world.
Children can be raped, people can be killed, and some idiot will still go "Ok but what why aren't we talking about Trump???". It's insane.
If they started to let the Trump stuff rest and focus more on Epstein, some people would come out of the woodwork to claim something ridiculous like "They're using Epstein to avoid reporting on Trump's racism". Not American myself, but I see things about him everywhere
No. 436685
>>436673American males are so American-centric it's not funny. It became blatant when 90% of those arguing about MENA politics are so fucking narcissistic they unironically use arguments only an American fox-news fuck could use and still have their heads in their asses when you point out just how you need to be consumed by the Duning Kruger effect to use said arguments.
But the most egregious example is that they don't realize dictators are actually pointing to that thing in the white house as a detriment of democracy. They have no conscious just how stupid even shitholes from around the world think they are.
No. 436689
>>436673>>436675>>436680lol why does everyone compartmentalize all americans as if we are some type of hivemind though? euro/asiafags need to stop listening to the vocal minority of twitter and the media and realize that is not the average person here.
honestly most of the people walking around in this country right now are totally numb over trump and all the other drama surrounding him. we are ready for the nightmare to be over.
hillary clinton actually won the popular vote in 2016 but the electoral college is fucked so that's how we ended up with this piece of work anyway.
No. 436693
>>436689I agree that americans are stupid and misinformed most of the time, but I can't really take it seriously when there's so much America-centric news out there and foreign retards still fuck themselves over trying to move here because all they want to believe is Hollywood lol.
it's 2019 the american dream is dead, stay home.
No. 436696
>>436683Sounds like you need to speak to a behavioral therapist about reforming the relationship you have with food and your image.
If you're out of that environment and away from
toxic influences, people expect you to work on it.
The sad truth is anon, that once you're grown and away from your parents nobody knows or gives a fuck about how poorly they set you up for life. People won't care to stick around to hear about the abuse you faced, and even if they entertain it at first they will tire of it. All outsiders see is you the broken adult who cannot get her eating issues under control.
Take action now because if your ED starts to show or if you're too vocal about it, all people will say is how you're negative and unwilling to take responsibility. It won't help you get better, it will make you feel worse.
Even though it's so fucking unfair.
You can do this, a lot of people do. It just sucks a lot and I'm sorry.
No. 436721
File: 1563559533897.gif (4.76 MB, 400x225, 9329480984.gif)
I'm a bit relieved over finding out the true colors of so called "friends" because it means they've given me justification to never put any energy or time into trying to be friends ever again. It's really fucking exhausting work. Actually I'm pretty bad at ever saying no to people so it's best when they remove all shadow of doubt that they're shitty.
>mfw nobody ever wants to visit me now that I have a place because it's still off the beaten path but it was no problem when they'd make me drive to them all the time and constantly the one to meet them at places
>mfw nobody texts me anymore because now I'm not the one constantly texting first and practically begging a relationship with them
>mfw nobody ever treated me like a first plan and I was always a backup when their other options didn't pull through
Lazy selfish low efforts. All I have left are a couple close friends who've unfortunately moved away long distance and a few beta orbiters. Oh well, still preferable to these fakes.
No. 436777
>>436652do you want validation specifically from men, or just validation in general? if it's the latter, join communities that are mostly female. this is quite easy to do online. getting validation from men, especially online, tends to come with a lot of risks.
>basic bitch minimum wage jobdo you think succeeding at your job will give you validation? focusing on work and school is a good idea, as most people get validation from their coworkers or teachers/fellow students.
No. 436874
File: 1563585626027.jpg (28.39 KB, 604x457, 45467582_10210688909892587_703…)
>>436696This hits far too close for home, but replace ED with CSA. I've finally accessed long-term therapy after being shuttled between different services and waiting lists that are in the 18 month range, and now I'm in it I don't know how the fuck to engage usefully. I mostly go there and cry every week. Therapy is meant to make me functional, but in order to go to therapy I need to be a level of functional that's above actively trying to destroy myself. wat do
No. 436900
Every few months my body decides to hate me. My joints and bones themselves hurt like they've been deeply bruised, where even clothing on my joints is painful, I can't lie down and get comfortable because it hurts so much, I get extremely fatigued doing anything, I get a fever, headache….
For almost 10 years this has happened and we've gone to so many doctors to figure out what's wrong and I always just get brushed off.
>"It really hurts when x happens."
>hav u tried not doin it then???
Like cool thanks fuck you, what am I paying you for?
All my tests come back normal because by the time I can get an appointment the attack is gone. They last anywhere from 2 days to 2 weeks, it's a hellish existence when they strike. I wish I'd be taken seriously, but I'm not.
I can't pinpoint when they happen or why, I've been off my period a week so possibly something with ovulation? A current theory at least.
I just want someone to believe me and not say "Do yoga" or "exercise" because I already do, I watch my diet, I watch my macros, I get my 8 hours, drink my 2L. I just want someone to help me.
No. 436928
>>436836Anon are you from the country where we are supposed to have a party at 5am with our neighbors waiting for the doctor?
Anyway, sounds like you need studies done. Hope you can get an efficient doctor and treatment soon!
No. 436989
>>436963Ugh, yes, it does look like GoT. I personally am still hoping it'll be okay but like… they could've at least made the trailer music something slavic.
It really doesn't have the same vibe as the books and games do.
No. 436996
>>436994I used a sponge roller and then brushes in smaller spaces. Still looks like dogshit.
Painting things white the way it will look uniform is hell. I think the paint is shit, but it's more likely my skills.
No. 437029
File: 1563628169883.jpg (149.66 KB, 1078x966, 20190720_150326.jpg)
Here we fucking go…
I'm not looking forward to these retards taking small bits from the book and twisting them into something else.
The kid just wanted to be like the rest of the witchers, the shit she was taking altered her, yes, but she never wanted to be male, had dysphoria or similar shit.
The fandom already has issues, mostly misogyny, but I'm not looking forward to the bigger, american "tumblr crowd" finding out about the show and the the bitching about racism, trans issues, x is y will start. Ugh
No. 437045
Met up with my high school friends last night. I haven’t seen them for a while, really missed them and was excited when one of them started a group text inviting us all out. I suggested my favorite italian restaurant in the city- it’s cheap, it’s all freshly made (both pasta and sauces), and its down the block from my favorite artisanal ice cream spot. They liked the idea and wanted to go too.
We meet up, and the place is PACKED. No big deal, I knew this going in and warned them because I’ve had to wait upwards of like 45 min before (could be worst tbh, but even if I get hangry, I love this place so much I know it’s worth it). We go in and ask for the wait time, host says he might be able to seat us immediately. Great! We wait outside (it’s a very small space) and they clean the table. I hear him come out and ask “wait was it (other party) or (my party) first?” to someone else. They seat the other party. Okay, no big deal, probably a mix up, shit happens. One friend goes in to ask, we get a wait time of 25 minutes now. Half an hour passes and no one calls us, bigger parties are called in and I try to give them the benefit of the doubt that I probably didn’t remember seeing those parties hanging around outside. My friends are complaining but I really want to eat here- I love it, it’s my favorite spot, I always bring my friends here and everyone has loved it so far. I go in to ask again to appease them, the host says “you’re the next party of four.” Great!
One friend says “I think he’s just not seating us.” We wait even more, friends start calling up other spots around the area. They switch the hosts and I go in to ask the new host what’s our wait time one last time before we go elsewhere, and she says there’s a party ahead of us. I hate being confrontational, so we just leave. We got ramen, which was fine, but it never sits well with my stomach even though it’s good.
I’m mad about the host giving us the run around instead of just a solid, straight up “it’s gonna be a 45+ minute wait” because it’s annoying to constantly be told “youre next, youre next” and then they call everyone but us. I’m also mad about my friends being super impatient because I just wanted them to try my favorite spot.
Ugh I haven’t been there in like 6+ months and now I’m torn from this bitter taste that the host left in my mouth, to still wanting to go back because I love it there.
No. 437047
>>437045>I’m also mad about my friends being super impatientThey weren't being impatient, they actually sound super patient to wait over 40 minutes with you while putting up with bad customer service from this restaurant.
While you couldn't have possibly predicted the wait issue, it should have started to feel embarrassing after the first time you got the runaround from the host at the 25 minute mark. Don't you feel that the table service would have had the same disorganization and wait issues had you been seated? It sounds like the place was slammed and at some point you have to put aside your wants and consider that it wasn't the night to go.
Don't take this the wrong way, but are you on the spectrum by chance? I had an autistic ex who lived a couple hours away from me who I would go visit. He wanted to meet up at his city to take me to a popular BBQ place. So after working an 8 hour shift, got into the car to drive the few hours, and get to his place the BBQ place he wanted was packed. I hadn't eaten all day but he insisted I be forced to wait. We didn't get seated until 8pm, the service was garbage, and the food wasn't anything special. I'm sure he criticized me for being impatient as well but sometimes it's not about what you guys want. Be considerate ffs.
No. 437124
>>436627Talked to him about the therapy, it didn’t go well.. I feel horrible for bringing it up and I regret opening my mouth
What is wrong with me
No. 437130
>>436954i miss my online friends too. i was closer to them than anybody in real life.
i had a really close guy friend for years who i would chat with on AIM. we shared a peculiar sense of humor that I've never found in anyone else. he got married and we ceased all contact. >feelsbadman.jpg
No. 437136
File: 1563649599696.jpg (35.47 KB, 500x493, sad potatoes.jpg)
I thought it would be a good idea to use up the poblano peppers I had in the fridge. I halved them and stuffed them with sauteed meat and onion and then sprinkled cheese on top. The package of mince I got was kind of pricey and it's really all I can afford to eat until Friday when I get paid.
The online recipes I saw at a glance from my phone steered more towards Mexican, but I just didn't feel like adding tomatoes or making them saucy. That might have been a mistake and maybe I should have sucked it up, now the meat and peppers are terribly dry and it makes me really sad. I haven't had a cooking fuckup in ages and of course it has to be when I'm low on cash.
I'm thinking of salvaging the situation by cooking some white rice and then maybe frying in the crumbly dry meat and cut up poblanos? The cheese is kind of meh but I don't see any other way of making this work unless a farmer here takes after Gordon Ramsay.
No. 437199
>>437186the snobby types tend to be students and jerk offs, but its true a lot of really talented people are insecure and project it in shitty ways. I personally really hate humble bragging and negative statements blanketed as compliments or advice, specially on male artists.
"like brah, i work like a million hours a week for shit pay because i´m legit brah, in fact i think on working even more for even less brah, working for 24 hours is the only way to go brah work work work, sorry brah gotta get back to work because you know, i WORK"
No. 437222
File: 1563664145204.jpg (43.17 KB, 400x581, model.jpg)
I'm a tall woman (175cm) and I've always hated my height. mostly because my entire life people (mostly strangers but sometimes friends/family) have made unsolicited comments about it. I've always felt insecure about it and wished I could be petite or at least short.
my ex boyfriend told me about how he liked short/petite girls and thought they were cute and "you can coddle someone shorter than you and it's cute". I told him I thought it was rude to talk to your partner about something you think is sexy that they don't have and he was just like "I've never thought that". he didn't even apologize for making me feel bad and just said that it was my problem for being insecure and I needed to work on. which, like, yeah I'm insecure and need to work on it but that doesn't mean you should rub it in.
he agreed not to mention short chicks after that, but the damage was already done and honestly gave me a complex that I never got over. every time we were out and about and I saw a petite girl I would just think about him wanting to fuck her. and even though we're not together anymore and I feel a bit better about myself I never recovered and I'm still thinking about my height all of the time and hating myself for it.
I wouldn't even mind being tall that much if I could be slender and have that elegant model/ballerina look (like the model pictured) but I have a super endomorphic body type and very wide hips and I could never look like that no matter how much weight I lost. it's making me depressed honestly.
No. 437231
>>437222>"you can coddle someone shorter than you and it's cute"But don't you see how super patronizing this is? Men find short women cute because they view us as less powerful and more like children. It's great when short women get men who respect them and also protect them, but those types of men are rare and far between. It's not such a fun feeling to be with a man who won't take you seriously and gets a kick out of physically always having the one up on you.
I've never stuck around with men who'd tell me what their "ideal" girl is in front of my face anyway, and it sounds like you dodged a bullet anon. I'm just trying to give you a perspective that his attraction to short girls wasn't innocent or enviable. You can't change his opinion or what's happened in the past, just own the cards you've been dealt because attitude certainly is something you can change.
No. 437247
>>437222I used to want to be short, but after getting harassed even as a taller girl, and knowing short friends had things happen to them such as: guys jacking off in front of them in public, boners in the back on public transport, bus drivers literally locking the door of the bus so she couldn't leave, sexual comments from strangers -
It's better to be taller because only the guys who are taller than you think they can bother you. It removes a percentage of potential harassers. Also you can see better over crowds, reach shelves and other bonuses. Other Anons are correct in that guys
literally look down on shorter girls. It's great for a guy to look you in the face.
Your bf was an asshole, even simply for having a LTR with someone who didn't meet his dumb criteria.
No. 437248
>>437240Agree with this, I can no longer be attracted to men who are taller than or outweigh me because I'm sure this fetishization of weakness will be part of it for them.
…and just in case someone says it's "just as bad" to chase weak men, clearly not. I'm a woman and am therefore capable of caring deeply for my partner (even if men aren't capable of loving back the same way).
No. 437259
File: 1563670793143.jpg (116.9 KB, 640x240, Fat_Princess_Logo_psd_jpgcopy.…)
I'm pretty sure I have either binge eating disorder or maybe just a food addiction. Ever since I got a job and moved out on my own, I've been eating so much bad food and junk food. I waste so much money on takeout but I realized recently it's not even about the food. I don't even eat just when I'm hungry. I'm estranged from my family (they were all either distant or abusive so now I just don't speak to them at all and they don't make an effort to find me)… I have friends, and they're pretty close, but I still feel very lonely sometimes. And I noticed that I use food to comfort myself when I feel sad. My parents would often skip buying groceries when I was growing up and so now I associate buying food with security I guess. When I get stressed about money, or debt, or my future, I buy fast food and this sick voice in my head tells me "see, you can afford nice food, you can eat whatever you want, everything will be ok". I eat way, way too much,, and only at night after work. I'll eat nothing all day and then have a 3000 calorie meal. I've gained 30+ pounds in just a year and I feel disgusting and terrible about myself. I feel horrible guilt after every episode, but I still keep doing it. When I think about my parents and how mad I am at them, I then want to "reward" myself with nice food because in a fucked up way it feels like the love and someone taking care of me that I feel like they didn't give me I guess.
It's all so humiliating and frustrating. I KNOW I don't want food all the time, I'm not hungry, I hate the way I look and feel, but I still keep overeating/getting fast food. Eating until I'm sick is becoming the norm, always in secret. I hate it and myself. But I feel like its something I should be able to just stop doing, just stop buying bad foods, stop eating so much, but I still keep doing it. I want to change but…I say that and do I really? If I really want to, why can't I just stop and make healthier choies? Idk it just fucks me up. I feel truly out of control over it. I'm 25 years old and my health and looks are only going to get worse if I keep down this path, and I know that, but I'm trash I guess and willing to throw my health away just for a little bit of comfort and pretending I feel loved and safe.
No. 437265
File: 1563672819830.png (193.25 KB, 599x551, 72493748798235.png)
>>437259My parents fucked up my relationship with food in a similar fashion. They were divorced so the rules about food were never consistent.
My dad used to restrict my food intake as a child, once chastising that "Boys will never like you!" because I was overweight. He'd make me do a lot of physical labor, while confusing me because he'd always buy me unhealthy food to eat when he did allow me to not be hungry.
I picked up the habit of eating whenever I could and in excess because I never knew when the next meal would be around him. Being able to eat finally gave me comfort after being stressed. I had food anxiety around him despite the fact that we weren't poor. Plus my dad was a deadbeat so whenever I visited him at his house in the middle of nowhere I didn't have much to do besides sit in my room and think about food.
My mom would constantly contradict my dad when I'd approach her and ask if I was indeed fat. She'd say "Oh no, that's just your baby fat!" And then allow gigantic portions of food whenever I asked for a meal, sometimes she'd make me eat even when I wasn't hungry and would scold me if I didn't finish food.
She'd assure me that "Jesus loves you" and so it was okay if I was bullied for my weight, there was no real problem with my eating and to just dig in. Food became this thing that I would go to out of stress and boredom to seek comfort.
Whenever I voiced that I wanted to eat less or go vegan, my mom would accuse me of becoming eating disordered even though I was clinically obese. One time she threatened to take me to the hospital to have a feeding tube put down my throat when I was a child because I lost some weight.
A few years ago I managed to get my habits under control for what I thought was long term. I dropped 60 pounds and made it to an average BMI. Then I met my ex, was with him for four years which turned out to be a stressful shitshow. As well as having worked a stressful job out of college.
I put all the weight back on and then some because I just didn't give a fuck. I wanted to eat food, which was the only thing that was giving me happiness at the time. I remember being perpetually stressed and just not caring about anything besides getting to the next day and the next meal.
Last year I had a complete god damn meltdown. I went to Japan and couldn't even wear my cute clothes because I'd eaten myself to a hambeast level. No pictures of myself going on my dream vacation that I slaved at that job over even exist because I didn't take any out of embarrassment. My ex started to distance himself from me due to the weight gain because he was no longer attracted to me anymore, but he still needed me because of what I brought to the table financially and the fact that I had a car so he just passively neglected me instead. I dumped his ass. Oh and I quit the horrid job too.
I started to dig myself out and I weigh 20 pounds less this year, but I've got so much more to go and it feels like I've dug myself into an impossible hole. Some days I still wind up binging, like ordering a sushi carry out with way more than one person should eat in a sitting. Most days I'm good but progress is super slow. I want to trim down again but I also want the food. Every day feels like a constant battle and I know I'm not trying hard enough. Combined with the fact that I know no one gives a shit about me and see me as a burden, it makes me want to indulge in food even harder.
What I'm saying probably isn't helpful but you're not alone sis. You're just gonna reach a breaking point where you'll either want to lose the weight or the numbers on the scale will just keep rolling.
No. 437285
File: 1563678032030.jpg (15.64 KB, 366x280, 1558004922887.jpg)
I'm tired of being tired all the time. Every night I only get 6-7 hours of fractured sleep, if I'm lucky. My mind feels fucked. I can barely think. I barely want to. All I want to do is rest but when I lay down in bed my body doesn't give. I feel like a vacant, stressed husk. It also makes me sad that my critical thinking skills are pathetically low now since this has been going on for quite some time. Or maybe I never really used my brain before. I can't remember. I hate being stupid. My appetite has also been low, and I haven't been eating very well, which probably doesn't help.
No. 437318
>>437285I'm going through that myself; I think my new medication has worsened it.
>>437287If you confront him, he's likely not going to be honest and only tell you what he thinks you want to hear in order to maintain whatever satisfaction he gets from having sexual convos with you. There is a possibility that he may be interested, but it's not worth shitting up the waters for. Everything becomes vague and confusing, a breeding ground for hurt feelings and possible abuse. If you enjoy the convos and whether or not something happens is not of importance, continue and see where it leads. Otherwise, I'd cease contact. I had a thing for a guy who was very off-and-on with me, a seemingly good friend who I sexually flirted with a lot. He ghosted me out of nowhere and is probably trying his tactics out on the new chick he ghosted me for because I wasn't putting out as fast as he'd like. Scrotes ain't worth a second thought anon. There's a reason we're taught to wait for a man to approach us if he likes us, because 99.9% of the time, if he doesn't say anything about his feelings for you… it's probably because he doesn't have feelings for you. I know it's hard, codependent pleaser here, but do have higher standards for yourself. Find the person that makes an effort, you don't have to settle for shit when dick is free.
No. 437320
>>437222It's happened to me too. Guys feel the need to comment on my flat chest a lot. I've always been insecure about it. One guy I was flirting with for a while (he had a thing for tall chicks and told me he preferred them to short chicks like me) was upset that I wouldn't get a plastic tit job if I married him. Kek.
>>437249Literally every guy I've been with, been interested, or flirted with long enough with has done this at some point. It's a scrote thing.
No. 437321
I got out the steamer today to get the wrinkles of of a pride flag I just bought and my dad saw it (it's the ace flag, so keep in mind it's black, grey, white, and purple). He asked what it was; I told him it was a pride flag. He grunted and said, "At least it's not one of those ugly rainbow ones… You know, they hung up a big one of those at work next to the American flag. It was bigger than the American flag. Lots of people today at work were pissed. They put their lives on the line for this country. People died for that (American) flag." Implying that homosexuality is not a right Americans fought for, and that there weren't homosexuals that served in the military. Why do you care who has buttsex behind your back anyway? My mother laughed, but then said "Man and boy love, look it up." Ah yes, homosexuality is the equivalent to pedophilia. Have you noticed there isn't woman and girl love, outside of fiction written by men? Ever notice that heterosexual men idolize young and/or small women? That teen losing her virginity or schoolgirl twin pigtails makes the front page of porn websites? The issue here isn't homosexuality friendo. My mother said nothing back. Just get me out of this sperghouse. Please.
No. 437332
>>437321Aside from your dad being a homophobic sperg, why the fuck would you have a goddamn asexual pride flag?
I can't wait for the summer to fucking end, we have newfags thinking that asexuality is some sexual orientation comparable to homosexuality, people defending trannies and obnoxious "ex-sex workers" or "sex-positive" activists defending camwhore cows.
No. 437333
>>437222I've been in the same boat as you anon, I'm 5'11"(180.34?) and hated it for most of my life. I don't know how old you are but I noticed that guys were only weird about it in my teens and very early 20's. Men that have a problem with your height are physical and/or personality manlets.
If it really bothers you try to find a taller guy so you can feel "petite". My bf is 6'7" so I definitely feel "normal girl size" with him but I can't say people don't stare a lot when we are together.
No. 437338
>>437332Because I've never been attracted to anyone my whole life, but I was pressured into relationships where I was almost raped. My parents tried to put me in an arranged marriage when I was 14. Being proud of my orientation is liberating.
I've been on lolcow regularly for over a year. It's funny you strawman saying that newfags (probably referencing me?) are comparing asexuality to homosexuality… I have not, and have yet to see it on this site. Yet, you compare me or said newfag talking about their lack of sexuality, to being the same as those who defend trans/ex-sex workers/cammers which are completely unrelated other than the fact you disagree with them.
No. 437345
>>437259>>437265Anons, I HIGHLY recommend the book Brain Over Binge by Kathryn Hansen if you want help. You can find a pdf of it online (I did), it doesnt try to fix your emotional problems like psychotherapy but provides great advice and methods to control the out of control eating habits, which regardless of trauma or psychological issues is ultimately just your brain doing what it’s used to, and you can rewire that. Seriously, it helped me so much. She also has a podcast if you want more material. Oh, and the Progress Not Perfection podcast is a good motivator too.
btw, before tackling weight loss please try to focus on reining in the bingeing first. You’ll burn yourself out. Let the victory over bingeing motivate you to carry on with the rest. Good luck!
No. 437370
>>437351Anon, are you me? The only difference is I am 24.
I don't know what to say or how to help you and how to help myself either. Just know you're not alone. We're gonna make it.
No. 437379
My childhood crush just admitted he still loves me
Crush isn't the right word. I have loved this guy for almost 6 years now.
I met this guy online in a gaming community when I was about 13. He lives a few states away from me. We grew very close over the years, and when we were about 14 or 15 we admitted to having feelings for each other. We kind of tried dating but only "dated" for a week. He said he didn't he could handle the distance, which made me really sad but i understood, as I knew it would be difficult for me too, and it's not like we would just fly to see each other because we were young. He is the first person I ever loved and that feeling to this day has not left me.
Even though we weren't dating after that, we would still tell each other how much we loved each other and became even closer than we were before. he got me through a very dark time.
When I was about 17 we were both dating other people. We were talking one day and said that his girlfriend wanted to move in with him but he was having doubts. he then told me he couldn't bring himself to say yes because he still loved me. This fucking broke me because i had feelings for him this whole time and i was always hoping he did as well. we both stayed with our partners. we both eventually broke up with each of our partners but never got together. i always wondered through these years if he had feelings still, because i sure fucking did.
Fast forward to now. Im 21. we've both obviously graduated and are in school or work, being adults. We both have had relationships on and off with other people. we both are in long term 2+ year relationships as of now. over the past few months ive felt torn up over my lingering feelings but obviously im not going to confess to him because that's not fair to him or our partners. im used to not being with him at this point so I just figured that is life. I have no idea if he still has feelings but i've always wondered.
Tonight. we decided to do a call. were both busy people, but we try to do one every few months so that were caught up with each other. the last few times we talked he told me he was thinking of breaking up with his current girlfriend, and I asked him about it again. I tried to dig a little deeper and see whats going through his mind. He gets quiet. My heart is fucking pounding because i think hes about to say what ive been wondering for all these fucking years. Then he drops the bomb. He has loved me this entire time. We keep fucking missing the windows of times when we were both single and could possibly have a chance to try and make it work out as adults. I told him I felt the same way. I cried on the phone and couldn't speak for about 5 minutes. He said he would drop his entire life to come be with me. This made me cry again. Why couldn't he tell me before. I love him so much but fucking god this hurts. I feel like he is my soulmate sometimes. It's also scary because what if i do break up with my current boyfriend? What if me and the guy ive loved for so long don't work out? Then ill have no one
My current boyfriend now is such a wonderful human being. I love him a lot and I don't want to break his heart. I don't know if I could live with the guilt of breaking his heart. i care about him deeply and don't want to lose him in any capacity. If I were to leave him, I don't think that he, my friends, or my family would understand or could forgive me.
Me and the guy are still friends. Obviously But fuck. Now we both have admitted feelings for each other. I hope this doesn't ruin the friendship i've built with him. I honestly don't know what to do. I think im going to stay with my current boyfriend because im already super fucking depressed and having a hard time, and my current boyfriend is a blessing. We love each other so much. I don't know if im ever going to be able to move on though. I don't want to move on.
Sorry there's probably spelling errors everywhere. My hands are shaking. I feel empty and confused.
No. 437384
>>437366Yeah don't take the job, get your visa/citizenship sorted out at home and stay with your family and friends
>I'd be going to India alone for several monthsFrom everything I've heard about India, india alone is a
very bad idea. Women get stalked by gangs of guys before they even get to their hotel, the staff
at the hotel stalk and try to get into their bedrooms, it sounds bad
No. 437387
>>437379It sounds like you both have similar personalities, in that you can't fully commit to your partners and like to while time away fantasizing about another person. If you get together you'll both end up fantasizing about someone else "maybe they are my true love?"
Shitty for your respective partners that you are like this anon. Sorry, you think it's romantic but it's a personality issue of "the grass is always greener."
Date him and prove me wrong.
No. 437390
>>437387*shitty that you are both like this
How can you both date people for years and "love them very much" and then have arranged calls with your "true love" aka backup plan, who you've never even met (based on the text here)
It's not romantic or sweet. Don't be the jerk who can never commit to someone but claims to "love them very much." Make a choice, either drop your "true love" for good or drop your boyfriend who you clearly don't really care about.
No. 444822
File: 1565104816946.jpg (76.9 KB, 500x494, dont do this ffs.jpg)
im not sure if this fits here but i guess it's venting so…
to start,even tho i like animals and i dont want them to be harmed,im not the closest to them and the closest interaction i can have is hugging,petting or stroking an animal.i dont get how people can have animals sleeping with them,licking their face etc,but i dont mind it overall.
THAT SAID
i have a friend who really loves her dogs and she is the type who sleeps with them,let her lick her face and all that jazz.HOWEVER she lets her dogs lick her mouth too and she kisses them and i find it kinda gross.a long while ago i asked her why she lets her dog lick her mouth and she said something like "dogs are cleaner than people" or something and tbh i didnt give it much thought.recently she started posting stories with one of her dogs as she was eating ice cream and she let the dog lick it and then she kept eating and then another one where she was brushing her teeth,the dog kept licking her face as she had the toothbrush in her mouth.i found the first one gross and the second one repulsive.i actually feel sick as im writing this.it's disgusting as fuck.like dogs lick their genitals and butts and then your fucking mouth.and toothbrushes are already disgusting and that makes it so much worse
maybe someone will say i hate animals or something but it's just a matter of hygiene.the dog wont get infections from you but you will.ALSO ASS LICKING
i know there are worse things than that but it suddenly got to me and i fell like my stomach is turning
No. 444829
>>444822I think the saying that dogs are cleaner than people was proven as false at some point. No sauce, but I'm sure it's easily googled.
I have a dog and love her very much, but no way will I ever let her lick my face lol. I usually give her kisses to the top of her head and she'll lick my hands and arm.
No. 444830
>>444822You are definetely not overreacting. As I was reading your text I had the urge to vomit. I really feel for the spouse of your friend as they are the one who gets kissed with a dogs butt lol
I also have animals but it is always important to have boundaries or they will not respect you and your space. Don't give them your food (who tf gives a dog ice cream!?) and don't let your dog sleep in your bed or let them lick your mouth (Dogs often put their noses in other dogs shit and eat dead animals). Your friends behaviour is just gross tbh
No. 444834
>>444829i dont doubt it cause just the sound of it is ridiculous.idk wtf a dog's saliva has,but there's no way it's strong enough to clean whatever there is in genitals and butt
my friend periodically gets mouth ulcers in the mouth and she is like "it's from my braces and the fact i dont take the best care of my teeth" WHAT ABOUT THE DOGS FFS
thinking all that makes me not want to kiss my friend again(in the cheek kissing type of greeting way)
>>444830her bf is pretty close this his dog too i think so he probably does that too idk.and if he doesnt,he has surely seen her and doesnt care.i honestly think of bringing it up the next time she posts something similar and say "dont you think this is too much and not hygienic at all?!"
No. 444882
>>444878> 25anon you're not old by any means, 25 is a perfectly reasonable age to not have settled down, depression majorly fucks you up and it takes years upon years of recovery and an uphill battle of taking your life back. your friends getting married and having kids doesn't negate that, at your age, you're NOT old and that it's okay not to have shit figured out just yet.
despite what the entire world seems hellbent on making us believe, 25 is not some ancient old age where if you haven't finished your degree, gotten a fulltime job, married and had 2.5 kids and a picket fence house then you're doomed forever. you're still young, you've got plenty of time ahead of you to do the things you like to do and get your life together. there's still time to finish college, there's still time to get a job (or a better one), there's still time to live bc your life has barely just begun by 25. breathe. you've got time. life isn't a race and even if it was you don't have to win it.
No. 444967
>>444878Do not feel bad or old anon! Life isn't a collection of milestones and you're not worse off for not having the same timeline as others. If anything, enjoy the parts of your life that aren't cookie-cutter. I'm not saying romanticize your depression but do try to find some sides that made your life unique. Time keeps moving on and you are not at the same spot you were in 5 years ago. Your school situation categorically might be the "same" but you're not the same person. The world also isn't the same. Please know you are always growing in a new way that you might not be aware of.
If nothing else, you've had the privilege of being alive so far.
No. 444969
File: 1565123562037.jpg (113.87 KB, 1080x1066, IMG_-e1uvnk.jpg)
>>444878Anon, I am on the same boat but due to a few gap years after a nervous breakdown post hs. You are trying and doing things at your pace, this is the exact moment for that meme with the flowers growing differently but you would never compare their beauty and shit. With all my heart I say this: you're trying even tho others seem to be passing you by and that is fucking powerful. I am rooting for you, anon. Please don't think less of yourself just because you're "old", you're not too old for shit. I am 25 too and I know what you mean but you are not too late for anything, nothing is ruined. You can still have those babies if you want, get married like everyone else, anything is still possible. I hope you feel better.
No. 444984
Does anybody else also feel like stopping to even try, regarding to their looks?
Every single year I get older, less and less men care about me. My sister is just 14, yet already seen as prettier as me. Men left and right, in media and irl desire barely legal girls, young men my age only go after teens and everbody acts as if it's weird if you don't like older men.
When I started working my part time job I was constantly hit on, but now it barely ever happens. My new coworker is 16 and often people ignore me completely for the sake of her. Like they only greet her although I'm standing right next to her. Older women truly are invisible and worthless in society, I already start to feel that now.
So, I often think, why should I bother with makeup when not even that is enough to make me "cute"? Eating what you want, dressing like a slob and doing the bare minimum is so much more comfy anyway.
No. 445025
File: 1565131136727.jpg (90.69 KB, 1280x720, wild-ride.jpg)
My wife is having job trouble and her mother is here and we dont get along at all. It's been the most miserable week since her mom is here in the morning when i leave for work and here when i get home. I'm trying my best to be there only for my wife and be supportive for her, but i cant stand her mom. she comes into the master bedroom whenever she wants to do laundry and it pisses me off. all she does is clean the house and tell me off when i ask her to be please be respective of boundaries. i want off this ride
No. 445037
>>445000Stop evaluing your body through male eyes, it can only lead to self hatred. In fact what you're doing is self objectification and it's fucked. Why would you want constant sexual attention?
Of course you can still take care of yourself and your looks, you're not turning to a troll as you age. In fact you can improve, get fitter, stronger, healthier, develop your own style…
You have a warped view of reality, men can look at teens all they want, the average age difference in the US is 2.3 years. You don't have to fuck old dudes.
And most of all, you're not in competition with your 14yo sister.
No. 445108
>>445076Yo anon I feel you, but I also can see where your dad's coming from. I'm not going to take shots in the dark as to why you're unable to hold down a job right now, but I wonder if your dad is concerned that you might be more vulnerable to being taken advantage of? Yeah, you're an adult and legally you can do what you want, but your parents are your parents and will always be worried about you.
I think talking to him is a good idea and just explaining to him that you don't want to feel infantilized. For what it's worth, though, my parents did a lot of the same shit to me when I was 20, and now looking back I can kinda see why. I was an adult, but I was kind of a dumb ass without a lot of life experience (severe mental illness when I was younger meant I missed out on school, socializing, etc.), so I was kinda emotionally stunted at that age.
No. 445172
>>445010imagine being an affeminate man but still seeing normal women you befriended under the guise of so called platonically in a sexual light
I dislike men.
No. 445174
>>444984I literally had the opposite experience
I used to be pretty much ignored by men in favor of cuter girls up until my late teens. Still even then, men didnt even consider me actually more than just a slightly cute girl up until I was 19. I am 21 and I get far more male attention than I did when I was 13,14,15, even though I can clearly remember as far back as like, 11 which is really gross. I dont wear makeup much, but I do dress better and focus more on skincare and far more on my hair beauty than I used to.
No. 445249
>>445233>>445232My hair is the same, my clothes and makeup are the same, my body is the same, my personality is the same, the only thing that changed about me is that I'm older. If people liked teen me, but not nowadays me even though I didn't change anything, then I don't believe that I just magically turned "ugly" - I just aged and people simply to dislike this.
>>445228Soon 24.
No. 445253
>>445251Because getting compliments is the only thing that builds up my confidence a bit. When people ignore you while smiling at others it naturally makes you feel lower than dirt.
Nobody can live without others liking them, I don't get why this is seen as so strange.
No. 445259
>>445254i…
how do people live like that? it's a huge health hazard especially when there's an infestation. they essentially start shitting and walking through it and spreading the bacteria all over everything they touch.
No. 445263
>>445253NTART but I do think you need to learn to love yourself more. I don't think it's strange, I like compliments too and a single compliment can sometimes turn my whole day around- they're nice! But most days I put on a little bit of eyeliner and wear things that make me look decent because I want to be able to look at myself and think "I look good today" and even if no one compliments me at all, I will still think that I looked good. There won't always be people there to validate me. If the world went silent everyone disappeared, I'll only have myself left, so I better learn to love me.
I think it's one of those things where, once you build up your confidence, people will sort of sense it and flock to you sort of thing. You might not notice the way that you're carrying yourself has changed, but others might.
No. 445296
File: 1565194614463.jpeg (201.45 KB, 540x585, BEA2CEE9-3E2A-4735-B6F5-7607A9…)
this prolific retard makes their autistic typing style so obvious it fucking hurts and of course, this anon is constantly in the proana thread, shitting it up with the other braindead anachans. honest to christ it’s the worst fucking thread in all of snow. not even because of its subjects, it’s literally the anons. all of them are exactly like this, attention starved as shit. how embarrassing and sad does your life have to be to unironically talk about your life like this in the fucking proana thread of the snowflake board on a mongolian pottery board. same goes for the weird mid 30s anons in the goth threads who sit around getting high on their own melodramatic farts whilst discussing what true goff constitutes.
i long for the day that admin goes rogue and dumpsters or perma-autosages consistently bottom quality threads. all they do is attract self posting, blogging, spam and the like. plus, there’s hardly even any fucking milk because these smoothbrained twats think shit like dissecting the BMI of some random facetuned anachan is more interesting than actually archiving anything properly.
No. 445342
>>444984This isn’t a humble brag but I’ve only gotten more male attention since getting older. I’m 24 now. It honestly is very irritating and awkward. Sometimes I’ll walk around with my dad and men will gawk and stare or outright hit on me. Or with my boyfriend or male friends. I really dislike it a lot, it makes me feel like a piece of meat or a property.
I haven’t changed much physically. My mental health has gotten better so I’m a lot happier and smiley/giggly when I’m out. I think your problem is maybe you look miserable all the time and scrotes view that as a signal to stay away. When you look happy and carefree they always try and ruin your day, because they see you as vulnerable and naive. I’ve noticed one of the only times I don’t get attention from men is when I am on my way to work (I have a stone cold expression because I’m pissed off since I’m not a morning person).
If male attention really matters to you, I recommend smiling more and acting like a retard. That’s literally what men are into. I don’t understand why you would willingly try this but I hope this makes you feel better… there’s nothing physically wrong with you and your age (24) isn’t old at all.
No. 445397
>>445364the normal cameras lens does make the nose larger ive noticed, i feel the same
i also use the tool for changing your forehead to match it irl because thats an area that always gets distorted weirdly