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File: 1614980779405.jpg (189.05 KB, 1200x900, but im on the guestlist.jpg)

No. 755067

>Rp an evening at the Lolcow nightclub. Larp as a cow or party on as a farmer.

Get in line loser, we're going raving.

No. 755070

>>755067
I arrive dressed up in my spinniest skirt and striped socks.

"UwU"

No. 755079

File: 1614981579101.png (416.03 KB, 773x996, roundemup.png)

>>755070
I've been saving this outfit for tonight

No. 755080

I want to go home.

No. 755085

>>755079
notices your bulge OwO

No. 755088

File: 1614982612505.jpg (Spoiler Image,66.91 KB, 535x673, s4b01fvj75k61~2.jpg)

>>755080
Hey wait. Do you have any ketamine? Can I get a bump

No. 755089

>My feet hurt
>This line is too long
>This music is too loud

No. 755104

I ask the DJ if they take requests and if the Cha Cha Slide is in the rotation.

No. 755110

File: 1614983973742.png (24.63 KB, 107x199, 1534536944780.png)

i just want to go home and jerk off to gay men

No. 755113

>>755104
Of course it is, what do you think this is? Our first rodeo?

No. 755115

File: 1614984122741.png (1.01 MB, 1068x601, EfvfEBSWsAkjbNY.png)

>>755088
yeah sure no problem, not to nitpick but you overlined your lips a little bit

No. 755118

File: 1614984260599.jpg (38.65 KB, 930x558, 3000.jpg)

>>755104
>this is something new
>the casper slide part 2
>featuring the platinum band
>and this time
>we gonna get funky

No. 755127

File: 1614985629324.jpeg (47.18 KB, 453x422, 420132FE-ACF2-466F-876D-40182D…)

Hell yeah! I’m unleashing my sickest moves, you have to show me yours!

No. 755143

File: 1614987860126.jpg (45.92 KB, 640x640, big-miss-steak.jpg)

I should not have eaten that edible before showing up

No. 755173

File: 1614990183949.gif (473.81 KB, 512x288, 1A8D02C0-D660-475B-80CE-C5A665…)

hahaha yay I love dancing

No. 755199

File: 1614991839370.png (Spoiler Image,944.47 KB, 1080x1060, Screenshot_20210305-181006~2.p…)

Avoid the bathroom. I went in to use the toilets and found this guy wailing on about anorectal violence

No. 755200

File: 1614991896024.jpeg (103.93 KB, 678x760, 17AEA2A9-CDCA-457E-AC4C-C138BD…)

I face planted as soon as I got out of the uber. I pregame too much.

No. 755208

>>755127
Anons don't worry I didn't forget the pre-game playlist

No. 755221

File: 1614995438910.webm (5.02 MB, 854x480, 1611158907926.webm)

Goes to the /pt/ table
How you crazies doing?

No. 755222

>>755221
This isn't the file I wanted to upload, but, i'll let it stay.

No. 755224

File: 1614995611343.jpeg (47.11 KB, 275x270, 1583156059030.jpeg)

>>755199
Don't worry, that's just Jaelle Stiles trying to scare you

No. 755225

>stumbles into club very drunk
>sees a girl two social classes lower than me, guess she's my new bitch
>u there, come see the drama I'm stirring up in the David dobrik subreddit

No. 755226

>>755225
please share with the class

No. 755689

File: 1615052679121.jpeg (18.95 KB, 299x303, 1614552152396~2.jpeg)

Time to take selfies in the ladies room

No. 755704

File: 1615053557400.jpeg (35.62 KB, 341x499, 3F1D40CC-DF3B-4C8A-9497-6BB33C…)

Hi I’m Dawn Denbo and this is my lover Cindy

No. 755708

starts removing skin and muscles
y'all want sum fuk

No. 755718

File: 1615054680959.png (159.4 KB, 269x313, Screen Shot 2021-03-05 at 6.17…)

>…so then…so then I was like, "you know what I think…I think all you mad old crows are telepathically communicating through yar saggy tits and nasolabial folds," and I'm not just gonna hide the thread bcuz I know they're trying to infiltrate my brain with their granny radfem psy-op shite. So they banned me, but then I hopped on my other vpn and told that old trannyjanny off haha it was awesome. Hey, you got some dorito dust on your shirt.

No. 755723

File: 1615055158267.gif (1.79 MB, 320x320, mHn73B.gif)

Hey, you! Yeah, you! How about it, huh? You and me? Yes?

No. 755734

File: 1615056303912.gif (6.7 MB, 320x568, readytodance.gif)

>>755723
Dancing is my passion, I'm ready to hit the floor

No. 755741

File: 1615057535888.jpg (308.37 KB, 800x534, shane.jpg)

i'm not having fun guys

No. 755745

File: 1615057778977.jpg (42.02 KB, 562x558, e9d2151a-472c-459e-8f44-c36754…)

You bitches better CHILL THE FUCK OUT and help me find who the fuck snatched my wig. I'm coming for you hoe

No. 755749

Hello DJ post thread music??? Let's get a playlist going

No. 755766

>>755749
Dj! Dj! Please play my favorite song!

No. 755768

File: 1615059715728.gif (2.63 MB, 158x337, myqueen.gif)

>>755734
Babe, I feel like you're the only one who understands me. I'm sorry if I come off too strong, it's my first time here.

No. 755774

File: 1615060179825.gif (1.59 MB, 320x180, norequests.gif)

>>755766
>>755749
No track IDs or requests…please step away from the dj booth ma'am

No. 755777

File: 1615060449062.jpg (91.36 KB, 1300x955, young-drunk-or-pregnant-asian-…)

Can one of you nonnys hold my hair back pls

No. 755780

File: 1615060822032.jpg (135.05 KB, 1600x1160, depositphotos_213925024-stock-…)

>>755777
Sorry nonnie, i thought you said to cut it

No. 755785

File: 1615061391083.gif (805.43 KB, 400x225, 1607527318191.gif)

I love this song!

No. 755794

File: 1615062370406.gif (1.38 MB, 160x160, tumblr_inline_n6vyj23Mw11soma0…)


No. 755799

File: 1615062580641.gif (2.53 MB, 316x192, 1500765941_asylum_dance1.gif)


No. 755804

File: 1615062713952.gif (3.16 MB, 480x270, giphy.gif)


No. 755811

File: 1615063500483.gif (12.73 MB, 798x442, 1613796244793.gif)

>>755734
Let's hit the dancefloor gorl!

No. 755817

File: 1615064164282.gif (1.12 MB, 244x286, 4B0F989C-A249-455B-B03F-4CC50D…)


No. 755827

File: 1615064952312.jpeg (225.85 KB, 1242x696, EC5EA497-3EA9-4BF1-AB4A-B39B3C…)

>>755811
OMG SHAT I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE HERE! PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR AUTOGRAPH!

No. 755832

Don't hurt your knees, ladies!!

No. 755847

File: 1615066067345.gif (5.62 MB, 268x304, 6EED0255-5C36-44E3-AA9F-72A723…)

let’s dance my kyodais

No. 755849

File: 1615066209531.png (171.48 KB, 335x308, Screen Shot 2021-03-06 at 4.28…)

>>755745
Anon don't look now but…I think that bitch over there stole your wig

No. 755854

File: 1615066579208.jpg (9.94 KB, 480x360, hqdefault.jpg)

>>755849
no fighting shakira shakira

No. 755859

Here I am. Here I am I am shitting on the dance floor. Here I am I am pooping my pants and flinging it around at everyone dancing

I let out a terrible shriek

No. 755869

File: 1615068183666.gif (3.65 MB, 498x373, A4E186C9-B846-43B2-920B-F471EF…)

where you AT my womeeeeeeeen ayee we’re feeling so retarded in the club TO-NIGHT yuhhhhh YUPP COME ON GURLZ LETS GET STOOPID

No. 755878

File: 1615068798047.gif (464.72 KB, 300x169, D1CAF065-A761-44FE-844B-EC299B…)

>>755143
no shame girl i’ve got blunts all lined up inside this coochi lets ride

No. 755879


No. 755880

File: 1615068822923.gif (Spoiler Image,11.66 MB, 702x442, 1613806064857.gif)

>>755827
Bye haydurs!!! Leaves

No. 755901

File: 1615071630014.gif (2.59 MB, 220x220, 66E9FB1A-B2B9-472E-A137-B001BB…)

>>755880
You think you can just leave??

No. 755911

File: 1615072946489.jpeg (53.99 KB, 800x534, B2E5E85C-CAB7-4122-A544-B967FD…)

>>755901
Omg, what shall shay do?

No. 755915

File: 1615073197485.gif (775.63 KB, 220x160, 04DE6324-018A-480F-A46A-378518…)

>>755911
Whatever, get on my level skank

No. 755920

File: 1615073624925.gif (787.89 KB, 498x498, 323F9B7A-3BBB-4B32-BC1F-7A3C9B…)

>>755915
No, you get on my level, friend.

No. 755929

File: 1615075596242.jpeg (81.88 KB, 639x774, 1544637746660~2.jpeg)

>>755221
I could use some fresh air, wanna join me outside for a nice relaxing smoke of meth?

No. 755934

File: 1615075959206.png (3.57 MB, 1814x2048, Screenshot_20210306-191224.png)


No. 755951

File: 1615077094931.gif (1.99 MB, 299x477, 9tWa.gif)


No. 755953

File: 1615077309450.jpg (189.08 KB, 1420x946, walpurgisnacht.jpg)

>>755934
There's some weird shit going down on the patio

No. 755958

File: 1615077826540.jpeg (78.75 KB, 712x506, 1609977503315.jpeg)

>meanwhile across the street

No. 755962

File: 1615078558213.jpg (116.56 KB, 279x741, AnnaKhachiyan.jpg)

Can someone get the bouncer, this street urchin followed me to the club on her bike and she keeps trying to sell me MDMA.

No. 755963

File: 1615078841342.jpeg (40.16 KB, 539x455, B7D259B6-5CE6-49D4-8809-C97D9C…)

more white claw please for your local lightweight

No. 756014

File: 1615084628040.png (56.83 KB, 485x443, 1605547767830.png)

>YEH ORLRITE! FAK ET! WHY NOT? CUD DO WIV SOME FREE GRUB ANNA LITTLE OF THE OL IN OUT!
>FAKKIN ELLI POSH ERE INNIT? GLAD I PUT SUM KNICKERS ON! TEND TA LIK FELINA BREEZ ROUND ME TALL GRASS! BEIN WOT LASS LIK ME CALLS ER'R' CUNNY HOLE, LAD BE GETTIN IMSELVA HOLE IN ONE IF HE CAN AFFORD A MEAL HERE E' WILL
>ERE NOW, WATS THIS SHITE? IT'S ORL IN FAKKIN FRENCH! OI CARNT READ THIS, I'LL END UP GETTIN A PLATE OF FAKKIN SNAILS WUNNO171
>I WONT PIE AND MASH DUNNOI. PLENTY OF LIKKER ON THA MASH, GUV!" I SED FAKKIN PIE AND MASH MB! AND A PINTA LAR ER FOR ME EDACHE!
>JOLLY FAKKIN ELL, IT'S IN ELL, IT'S ME TIME! OI LUV GITTIN SHAGGED ONNA RAG! GUNNA AVE ME A RED WEDDIN INNA LOO, AIN'T THAT ROIGHT

No. 756016

File: 1615085335013.jpg (43.63 KB, 320x450, 20210306_204816.jpg)

>>755067
Excuse me fellow girls, do you have any extra tampons? I just got my period and forgot them, silly me. Also if any anon needs help putting theirs in I'm here as a fellow woman to help.

No. 756058

File: 1615098982306.jpg (63.04 KB, 640x480, lesbian bar.jpg)

there's something bothering me about this place

No. 756079

File: 1615101938148.jpg (65.58 KB, 815x607, 10-7614E4BD-F959-4D9A-B1A3-15F…)

>>755704
Hey, I'm Shane and this is my friend, Jenny

No. 756089

File: 1615102806413.jpeg (422.7 KB, 1280x1707, 6596105C-2F69-40FC-BBD1-FD43F8…)

>>756079
You two cuties are hawt, mind havin’ a drink with me, a ragin’ butch lesbo?

No. 756093

I wanna relapse with Shayna if im already here

No. 756099

File: 1615103688308.jpeg (341.81 KB, 990x1024, 5AD5BA09-F208-489B-AAE8-5F2193…)

>>756089
go ahead and strap it on in babe

No. 756104

File: 1615104841270.jpg (42.11 KB, 612x408, istockphoto-623178780-612x612.…)


No. 756277

File: 1615139575007.jpg (40.99 KB, 495x491, trannies jamming.JPG)


No. 756304

File: 1615141822298.jpeg (85.78 KB, 615x794, 1569226090256~2.jpeg)

Hello fellow party people, surely you wouldn't happen to know of any fine young men looking for big titty goth gf in this establishment, would you?

No. 756403

File: 1615148361279.jpeg (130.3 KB, 269x340, 1598642596788.jpeg)

Is club lolcow wheelchair accessible ?

No. 756405

File: 1615148499203.jpg (42.86 KB, 650x867, Christian-Weston-Chandler-Body…)

>>756016
I think I'm going to need a hand, thanks cister

No. 756408

File: 1615148730577.jpg (1.78 MB, 3024x4032, c2b2f73a6af298e829fe2a3643a5e4…)

>>756304
You're just my type

No. 756418

Woooo! I'm on my third gin girlies, feels like forever since I just let loose you know?? Omg!!! I love this song! I love that the dj only plays kesha!!

No. 756429

File: 1615150082657.webm (1.1 MB, 360x640, 1614733694051.webm)

Please send help, he won't stop talking to me !

No. 756443

File: 1615150653797.png (739.42 KB, 593x497, 1605935763161.png)

>>756429
My gun’s bigger than yours

No. 756515

>>756429
>To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. So like, what are you doing after this?

No. 756523

File: 1615156499983.gif (143.79 KB, 220x157, tenor.gif)

>>756093
good luck anon, last I saw her she was in the bathroom talking to herself about anorectal violence

No. 756535

File: 1615157422692.jpg (113.53 KB, 1080x554, 1614400904725.jpg)

>>756523
after showering, taking a FAT dab, eating a cheemsburger, peeing on my sweater (oops!), putting on my make up, and filming the best video ever, I'm back at club lolcow to grace you all with my presence. Who's getting me drunk?

No. 756556

File: 1615158555153.png (610.85 KB, 1076x705, Screenshot_20210307-180713~2.p…)

>>756418
He's DJing from youtube and he hasn't installed adblocker

No. 756558

File: 1615158782903.png (1.97 MB, 750x1334, 1615125714961.png)

Any1 got more whippets? Don't worry tho, totally sober!! Plz donate to my gofund me

No. 756566

>>756556
Who the fuck has depression if i hear one more advert for mindfulness I'll kms!!! Tiktok on the clock but the party don't stop oooooh wooooah wooah ah woooow

No. 756702

File: 1615173571887.jpg (76.18 KB, 476x635, Ev7KMaXXEAAyUoD.jpg)

>>756089
hey gals. i changed up my lewk lets party!

No. 756719

>>756702
Oh cool, nice weed plants!

No. 756746

File: 1615179507295.png (Spoiler Image,630.65 KB, 750x522, D52AC743-CA98-41AE-B800-9F969F…)

>>756702
love to see a butch plant daddy lbgtqia queen mmm i also grow tomatoes here’s one of mine (heirloom ofc)

No. 756761

File: 1615181713312.png (217.83 KB, 331x498, crying in the club rn.png)

>>756566
Depression? In MY club lc??

No. 756790

File: 1615187353073.jpg (89.21 KB, 576x803, 75f657riug521.jpg)

>>756746
I'm seeing signs of anorectal damage. Disgusting.

No. 756793

>>756790
I pray to God that this is AV-kun's true appearance.

No. 757342

File: 1615253909230.png (1.75 MB, 1010x1304, a-man-wearing-a-wig-portrait-.…)

Happy Women's Day! Drinks Are On Me Ladies <3

No. 758031

>>757342
Omg I love your hair! Can I have it?

No. 758794

File: 1615423807524.jpeg (90.19 KB, 800x450, must-see-shorts-kiss-and-tell-…)


No. 758795

>>758794
oops forgot to add

I randomly kissed a girl! ahaha im so unique and quirky

No. 758799

>>757342
rip kurd cobain

No. 758802

I'm feeling random tonight!

No. 758823

File: 1615426580835.jpeg (174.6 KB, 750x924, 1615100286296.jpeg)

Nice to meet you, darlings. Allow me to introduce myself. Behind these pale green eyes of mine lurks a delusory intellect that apon first notice, you'd most likely wouldn't identify is there, especially if our first meeting is in a party situation, when my accent becomes thick and i'm boistrous and loud and cheerfull….until i wind up rambling on about psychology, philosophy or science. Who among you would like the pleasure of buying me a drink(s)?

No. 758851

>>758823
Fuck it Vic I'll buy you a drink! Let's talk about the uda

No. 758864

File: 1615430128346.jpeg (41.87 KB, 480x252, F186EF68-3954-4A76-8E0C-F5288C…)

Spends 45 mins drunkenly explaining that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell

No. 759369

DJ bump my fucking anthem, I know it's a scrotey but it's the most relatable song I've ever heard

Dinner at a gas station
Taking out some cash
Eat an egg salad sandwich
Standing over the trash
Got so much garbage in the car that I can't see out the back
My entire grocery list is just liquor and snacks

It's time I grow up, but I don't know how to start
For Halloween, I gave kids Nicorette and old Pop-Tarts
Sleep with the TV on, 'cause I'm not cool with the dark
And I'll turn around and go home instead of parallel park

No. 759499

File: 1615511104904.jpg (6.33 KB, 224x224, EdAvyojXgAEYzEp.jpg)

Hi ladies

No. 759503

File: 1615511917408.jpg (35.86 KB, 600x450, urdeadpal.jpg)


No. 759523

File: 1615513472685.gif (2.74 MB, 275x275, 1613704029252.gif)

Oh shiiiiiiiiiittttt!! I love bumping it to this song. DJ TURN IT UPPP

No. 759533

File: 1615514159452.jpg (255.5 KB, 700x525, CLUB.jpg)

>>755741
>>759499
>>759503
Is this man bothering you?

No. 759534


No. 759547

File: 1615516008925.jpeg (50.22 KB, 600x800, 0746D7BE-62CA-4A8D-82E2-B0DA01…)

>>755067
‘tun up the fookin’ chewnz loike

No. 759645

. hooiiiii bitche s let’s do coke in the bathroom lol jk I don’t have any but I did bring an entire bottle of Pinot Grigio in my tote bag haha I’m just crazy like that anyways who wants to dance

No. 759653

File: 1615528593585.jpeg (39.89 KB, 355x400, 07F9C5A2-7A8A-416E-AC57-B0A434…)

>>759645
Psssssst… psssssstt!!! Anon! i got the stuff, just don’t tell the rest, this is just for you and I, nonnie

No. 759705

File: 1615539902285.jpg (20.72 KB, 474x348, download.jpeg-2.jpg)

I actually brought coke, sooo, lets GO

No. 759709

Can we clear some space on the dancefloor for my gf?

No. 760545

File: 1615651401659.jpg (889.52 KB, 1242x1385, 1615611529521.jpg)

Shatna is back!!who wants to dance?

No. 760561

File: 1615652867362.jpg (854.68 KB, 1629x1080, PicsArt_03-13-06.26.28.jpg)

>>760545
The dog can stay, the fatty must leave

No. 760581

File: 1615654892430.gif (1.07 MB, 250x250, F6966EF1-4E76-41C1-BA3C-585633…)


No. 760639

File: 1615658552014.jpg (13.7 KB, 192x270, -mvkwnp.jpg)

>>760561
Wow, you guys are just haydurs.

No. 760640

File: 1615658701353.gif (1.56 MB, 218x275, 1535669155360.gif)

Feeling random, anybody want to livestream in the bathroom with me

No. 760683

File: 1615662200693.jpg (16.03 KB, 300x200, e67bb33e0c45c56c11c673cfb1467f…)

>>760561
watch your step, ladies! mind you don't trip over the trash in the gutter on your way inside.

Enjoy yourselves and remember, if anyone approaches you to beg for a cheemsburger and money for drugs, please report them to Club Lolcow security. This individual was escorted out last night after a disagreement between members of her party led to a drunken meltdown screaming match, during which she fell on her ass and had to be carried to the door.

No. 760723

File: 1615665155098.jpg (122.02 KB, 867x1390, creepass-young-man-making-isol…)


No. 760724

File: 1615665217183.jpg (101.32 KB, 1300x821, beautiful-female-feeling-uncom…)

>>760683
mr security guy sir… i think this
creep put sum shit in my drink?
>>760723

No. 760803

File: 1615673949632.jpg (37.28 KB, 552x585, security.jpg)


No. 760829

File: 1615675745820.gif (Spoiler Image,2.39 MB, 480x256, 1615661443769.gif)

Any anybody want to spot me some money for a dispo trip? Dinner??? Anybody??

No. 761347

>>760829
only if you put your shirt back on

No. 766471

File: 1616340182450.jpeg (114.46 KB, 483x692, D592448D-DD81-4EF8-B917-A1242A…)

Can y’all validate me plz

No. 766500

>>766471
The thumb surgery was a success

No. 766504

File: 1616341815878.jpg (58.43 KB, 748x750, ladies.jpg)

>>766471
Sorry, no entry tonight

No. 766860

>>766471
I’m calling security

No. 766903

File: 1616387013385.png (2.26 MB, 1600x1200, maritza-ramos-not-oitnb.png)

>ayo you got some money or something for our drinks?

>yeah… for like… our drinks or somethin'?

No. 767639

>>766500
Lmaooo

No. 768306

File: 1616556455138.gif (2.21 MB, 300x200, tenor (2).gif)

>>766860
I'll take care of this



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