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No. 332611

I’ve been here for quite some years and I know a lot of you have been, too. Surely a percentage of posters here are around 30, or over 30. For those of you that are - how are you handling it?

Share your successes, insecurities, and life wisdom. Share fashion and beauty advice.

How do you feel about nearing 30/being over 30? Have you found the incel cope about 30+ women to be true in any way? What were your biggest fears, and what are your biggest triumphs at your current age?

Absolutely no Zoomers allowed in this thread, unless you’re an elder Zoomer. Zoomer ageism is peak stupidity and we won’t have it here.

No. 332614

I turned 30 last January and honestly I feel absolutely no different than the last 10 years, if anything I feel like I've been flourishing since last year by daring to do new things and being more social and outgoing (this has nothing to do with my age). I've often been told I look younger than I actually am but I don't care, my appearance has never been a source of insecurity for me so I probably have it easier than most women. Also it probably helps that I'm a lifelong celibate and being volcel preserves me from having to deal with relationship woes, and since I don't want to get married nor have children I couldn't care less about my clock ticking. I'm just scared of old age but we are not there yet.

No. 332620

Thank you for your reply! I have around 1.5 years left before turning 30, and it feels like my life is ending due to the regular male rhetoric and media portrayals. It also doesn’t help that early 20s women talk about women over 30 like they’re hags. I have also always looked younger than my age, so I guess it’s not aging itself that is scaring me (I know I’ll look okay for a long time) - it’s wearing the “30 badge” and potentially being looked at as lesser because of it. I don’t want children, so that’s also I factor - because people judge women so heavily for that.

I’m not sure I’m content in my relationship, but now I’m afraid to consider leaving because of the idea that most men prefer younger woman (20-24).

I posted Taylor for this thread because she’s 33 , and to me looks even better than her previous years. Plus she seems to be thriving and really enjoying her life, more so every year.

No. 332627

I turn 30 in a few months. I'm finding that I'm most insecure about being a cringey womanchild at this age. I still really enjoy playing games and participating in fandom, but it's hard not to look around and feel like a creep who's overstayed her welcome when most of the people interacting with my fanart are at least five years younger than me.

No. 332630

If it’s any solace to you, I find it refreshing when women past their 20s still enjoy youthful activities and interests. It’s almost like they stay eternally young, it’s an ageless quality and not something to be ashamed of

No. 332632

I'm well over 30 (38) and I've arrived here as a result of being "terminally online" most of my adult life. I grew up really sheltered (religion) so the internet was my only outlet, especially socially (also homeschooled).

I was gonna go for a career in IT/computers but I can't stand geek culture.

I'm single. I'm not interested in a relationship. I got diagnosed with ADHD like a couple years ago, which explains why I just don't get excited for the same things normies are into. And why mostly what holds my interest is digging deep into complicated videogames.

Shrug, that's it.

No. 332640

I'm turning 31 this month and honestly, so far my 30s have been good! I don't really look any different than I did at 25, but I feel a lot more at peace with my body and my looks. I used to be very insecure about how I looked, but I realize now that I look totally fine and it's not worth stressing about. I regret judging my body so harshly in my 20s.
I don't really have any worries about aging because I know I will always be the same person inside and my age can't change that. I won't change myself to fit anyone's stereotype of a 30-something woman and so on. However, it is hard to see all the ageism out there. Young women think their life is over by 21. I feel bad for them and I try not to let it drag me down. Life is long, enjoy every part of it.

No. 332646

29 here. I really don't feel it. I dont care much about the age I guess, but I do feel a little weird when I remember how old I am yet still don't seem to know how to socialize? I am good at one off things. Just never could figure out how to just fit in somewhere. One good thing about getting older is that there does seem to be less pressure to be in constant contact with people, and the outings can be both goofy and mature at the same time. Time boundaries get respected a little more. I gained a little weight from some meds that basically do the ambien thing and I would eat a lot at night…working on it. Im bmi 26 ish maybe 27 I think. I really, really dont want to hit 30 being overweight. I used to be borderline buff, life happened then covid happened and now it is now and idk where my muscle went. Its floppy and I have more cellulite. I also have quite the collection of thick black chin hairs I suspect are part weight related, part age related, and part med side effect related. So I guess i am mourning the body I seem to have lost kek. But I am very motivated in finding a gym to get re buffed, its just everything around me is awful or really expensive. My 'career' is kind of a joke, kind of not. Idk. Ive made great progress for myself considering my personal circumstances, but, most people who go my pathway have me feeling like my business is basically a kids lemonade stand. My gray hair started coming in a few years ago, but this year the amount has exploded. I stright up love it. I love my bright silver strands. Cannot wait for more. Idk. I am both more lonely than I expected to be, but more secure in keeping my own company rather than embarrassed now. Weird times.

No. 332649

Early 30s anon here. I’m more comfortable in my own skin than ever and don’t think about my age a lot other than the occasional “wow time goes by so fast”. I feel like I'm getting by ok. Bought my own apartment and am self-sufficient. I don't want children, maybe I would have stressed more about my age if that was the case.

>Have you found the incel cope about 30+ women to be true in any way?

30 is nothing lol. I became single at 30 and finding guys was no issue (for those of you who are into that). Met my new nigel that same year who is a few years younger than me. Right now I feel like I'm probably gonna keep dating younger tbh so maybe when I’m in my 50s-60s it’ll be harder to find decent men, but by then I’m probably gonna become celibate anyway.

No. 332651

Am curious about other anons experience with this… I am one of those 'never sits in a chair properly' people. Quirky when youre 17, weird when youre 30 kek. But whatever. This year I sort of have to 'sit properly' in my chair. Sounds weird but it is a safety reason, I have to be able to jump up out of my chair suddenly if I drop something that is very hot. I work from home sometimes I take my shoes off and cruss cross my legs but that isnt not safe. My entire leg, sometimes both, fall asleep within minutes. Im not exactly sedentary, but also not super active. Its straight painful. Is this an age thing? Ive never had to sit normally like this before to judge if it wpuld have happened all along or is something I am experiencing due to aging kek…I get up a couple times an hour to walk and stretch and do wall sits etc. I find a hard metal folding chair is actually the least likely to make my legs fall asleep and a cushioned one is most. Still happens way to quick and often. Did I fuck up my nerves by never sitting properly so they grew in a weird way??

No. 332654

32 and just enjoying a peaceful chill life.
I feel more confident than I was when I was younger, I guess now because I know what I like, don't like, not afraid to tell men to fuck off, and make enough money to travel, work out, and pursue hobbies. Got lucky to marry a chill partner who also doesn't want kids, so we're just enjoying life and saving for retirement.

So far aging hasn't bothered me, maybe because I still look young so it hasn't hit me yet. But also for a long time I've worked out, eat healthy, yoga, and focused on skincare over make up. So I don't feel physically different neither, just happier now that I have muscles. So the earlier you can start some sort of any physical activity, the better you'll feel when you get older.

And I've noticed as I reached 30 I've gotten a protective eye over younger girls out in public when creepy moids go near them. The advice I want to and try to give to any young girl is don't do hook ups/one night stands with any dude, nothing about it is worth it. You're not going to orgasm, it's dangerous, and chances are he's a loser. Especially since redpilled scrotes are so common now.

And I guess these days I've been reminiscing about my childhood. I think being a kid in the 90s was the sweet spot. Young enough for a normal healthy childhood before technology got big but then got to enjoy internet/tech in pre-teens. Thinking back on N64, playstation and ps2, 90s anime, 90s movies, children cartoons, Adult Swim, Toonami, etc. I dunno how zoomers feel about their pop culture, but I still think the 90s was the best kek. But now parents just put an ipad into their toddler's hands asap, and seems like gaming addiction is on a new level so people are losing socialization skills. Rip 90s

No. 332660

It's fine. I finally got a couple visible wrinkles around 32 years old which was novel. I took a break from the smoking and drinking that I did daily in my 20s and damn I feel stupid about that because I felt sooo much better when I stopped. Cursed knowledge though because I still indulge I just feel bad about it now. The thing about nicotine making you more anxious not less is true. I felt like there was a big mental shift for me around 28 where things started to make more sense, like I got the ability to reflect on the past in a new way.

No. 332667

>I got diagnosed with ADHD like a couple years ago, which explains why I just don't get excited for the same things normies are into.

There is not a more normie mental illness than adhd, what are you on about?

No. 332671

i'm 31, I don't feel any different mentally. i'm in way better shape than i was in most of my 20's, and i don't drink anymore because i just stopped craving alcohol entirely. literally nothing else is different, 30 is just an arbitrary number that doesn't really mean anything.

No. 332674

I'll be turning 30 next year but I haven't felt particularly different since I was a teenager. Some things that concern me is my fashion and interests I guess. I don't really like super mature looks on me I prefer more feminine and cute styles with bows, ruffles and lace. Of course pink is my favorite color as well so I'm afraid that I'll end up not "dressing my age" but I really don't want to care about any of that. I'm a huge fujo too and I've been told that I'll grow out of it eventually but I don't think it's ever going to happen. I do feel quite alienated though since most women seem to move on from this kind of stuff as they get older and I don't like interacting too much with people under 25 despite my personality and attitude seemingly still being stuck in my early 20s

No. 332675

>No career

No. 332676

This isn’t a thread for criticisms especially involving age, just honest and open thoughts about yourself and your age. Judging someone for doing or not doing something at any age should not be tolerated here. You wanna talk about careers or lack of, make another thread. Next.

No. 332677

I’m the same way with fashion. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wearing whatever you like - what’s odd is when people dress in styles they obviously dislike just to fit in. It’s almost like people can tell you’re just not being yourself. People look best in what makes them happiest, end of story.

No. 332678

hello fellow homeschool victim. didn't know there was more than one of us here.

No. 332679

i've read the post you're replying to like 6 times and i can't find where she said she doesn't have a career?

No. 332685

why doesn't anyone ever talk about how food tastes better as you get older? when i was younger spicy food had no flavors, it just hurt my mouth, and mixing different kinds of intense flavors (like ketchup + mustard) would make me gag sometimes. i feel like i get to actually experience all the flavors of food now instead of just the most powerful ones.

No. 332686

Same, I'm 30 and I still dress like it was 2005 (low rise skinny jeans and band shirts), mostly because it's the things that fit me and I don't care about trends, I've incorporated more elements in my outfits but the fact that I still wear some clothes from high-school is telling lol. I'm also still a yumejo and the older I get the less interested in moids I become, I wonder how I'll be in 10, 20 years…

No. 332692

I enjoy a much wider range of foods now but the taste-change happened in my twenties not thirties. The only benefit I'm getting with my thirties is just from the experience of having eaten and cooked more things. I can tell why some food is bad (like in what way someone cooked it or what cheap ingredient was used) and I've tasted better food than I thought I could taste. Honestly it's a double edged sword because some of my old favorite treats taste crappy to me now… I'll never enjoy kraft mac again.
I used to think it was just something my dad complained about but now I too genuinely think almost everything has too much salt in it. I love salt but it's ruining some foods.

No. 332716

Today my mom said that your 20s are much harder than your 30s and she had a much better time during her thirties. I really hope that's true because I'm mid 20s and this shit is SO HARD. 30s nonas, what do you think?

No. 332720

>the exact ages of me and my grandmother
Gross, I hate moids

No. 332727

I freaking love taylor, great thread pic, I'll keep this thread unhidden just to see her every time I enter /g/. Sage and spoilered for fangirling

No. 332732

29 and spent the winter months freaking out about it, but I’ve calmed down since. I think what was getting me was the fear that I will continue to not want to pursue a relationship with a man and/or have a kid until it’s too late for both and then I’ll want it more than anything and feel like I ruined my life. I’m still kind of worried for that, but have decided to do what feels right for me and that’s working on myself and being alone—if it turns out I was wrong to do so, I guess I’ll cross that bridge when it comes.
I feel like it’s become a little easier to be healthier as far as exercising and not drinking goes as I’ve aged, but I’m still shit at food. I hate cooking and eat out and easy things all the time and I’m worried I’ll get fat in my 30s if I keep it up.
I wish I hadn’t wasted half of my 20s in an awful relationship with a walking nightmare of a person, but otherwise, my life is already way better than at any other point in my 20s and I have no regrets. I think I’ll just keep getting comfier and more confident with time and I’m ready for it.
Also OT, but do you guys feel like it’s rare to randomly meet people the same age as you? Is it just part of adult life where everyone your age-ish is a few years older or younger? I was born in the first half of 94 and I just feel like it’s maybe unusual how uncommon it is for someone to be the same idk

No. 332745

I'm turning 30 next year and it's… weird. I never thought I'd be this old. I always figured I'd be dead. I think I've really grown emotionally and socially over the last decade but there's still more to do lol

I still live at home because we're in one of those crazy rental markets and a social worker's salary just won't cut it. (Fun fact, there's multiple social workers and human services employees on public benefits in my county!) But I'll be getting a raise next year and if things don't get worse (kek) I'll move out. I was on my own in college and liked it. It's just leaving my family behind for real is strange and foreign to me.


Hey, 94 baby! I'm a late 94 but yeah, once you're out of high school, it's hard to meet people in your birth year.

No. 332753

my sister in law shares my birth year but we are in such wildly different situations I don't feel like she's the same age as me (our personal lives are equal sort of but she has a PhD and just feels more grown up to me). Literally never met anyone else born my birth year (not even school because I skipped a grade and then got homeschooled which sucked).
That's something I wish I did in my twenties but I was just too scared: go to school. Get an associates or something. Maybe my thirties will be the time….
Sort of on-topic: the way there's a 5-minute shorts show called Turning Girls about "girls who face a battle against the turning point of their lives" (turning 30) and the finale is ridiculous and makes fun of expiring when you turn 30 if anyone wants to watch it (start at the beginning if you want to know the characters, it's short and one of them is absolutely a cow).

No. 332776

What a nice idea.

I'm 37 at the moment, honestly didn't really realise my change from 29 to 30 as I've been going strong with depression, self-harm, ED, alcohol and bullshit like that. It only hit me some years ago well into my 30s that I'm doing and feeling better than before, I'm calmer, I don't care about most of the bullshit and stupid people around me and I've learned to ask for help when I need to. I'm also mostly cured from all this things destroying me while younger and that's a big relief.
What I still don't get is having children and the need to "dress your age". I've been thinking about it a lot lately after a class reunion and most of them had children by now, but it just isn't something for me and I'm very much okay with it. Dressing my age, well, no, I will continue wearing skinny jeans and band shirts (and sometimes galaxy leggings)
The most important thing I learned so far is that you are never too old to change and learn. I finished my apprenticeship in my early 30s, got another degree a year later and still think about going back to university because I fucked up my degree years ago with all the mental health shit going on at that time. As long as I'm breathing I can change things and learn stuff.
The only thing I'm sad about is the lack of people that are like me, without family, children, just free. I sometimes miss being out at night, going home in the morning and not caring about a thing in the world. And I regret being poor and not having a house with a garden by now, kek.

So, my advice to nonnas turning 30s, it's not so bad. Honestly, my mental health issues got way better and other women my age confirmed that, you will be more confident and know what is going on with you and you really don't care about a wrinkle here or there. One sad thing is that you will lose people along the way and it will hurt and you will remember them but that is just life.

just wanted to say Hi, nice to see someone here that is older than mid 30. Hope you are doing amazing.

No. 332789

turning 32 next month. so far, i can say that my 30s are shaping up to be much better than my 20s!

it's nice to see that there are other posters close to me in age.

No. 332793

Just chiming in to say I’m 30 and besides being physically weaker due to my own laziness, I’m somehow at my peak. Putting in the work in my early 20s paid off and I still have a good physique and muscle tone. I didn’t start taking care of my skin (properly) until I was like 27 but luckily my genetics (and the fact that I couldn’t afford to go tanning back when that was trendy) carried me to having good skin. Anyone approaching 30 please don’t freak out because life is good!

This is true for most people, including me. But it just depends bc obviously someone can fall onto hard times at any point. At 30+ though you’re better mentally equipped to deal with things.

No. 332795

the only thing i'm worried about is my smoking habit that will make me look older than i am

No. 332804

eh, not that well, honestly. it's just that I am soon getting treatment for a crippling disease I had most of my life but didn't find out what it was until recently. I also have a speech disability, am an autist (diagnosed) that has never even talked to a guy before, and I'm scary-looking. Aging is great imo when you have eggs in all sorts of baskets. I hope the treatment will give me a second lease on life because everything else is quite bleak.

No. 332807

I actually can't believe i am turning 27 this year. It feels unreal. I wasted so much of my 20s and teen years being sad and I want the remainder of my 20s to be happy and I want to get healthier before becoming 30.

No. 332809

I've been trying to find women who are 30+ or at the very least 25+ in my fandoms, I wish they were easier to find. I tend to be wary of public Discords since I hate having to walk on eggshells around gendie/shipping anti types but it still bums me out when the rules have an age limit like "18+ but no one over 30" even though I don't really want to talk to the vast majority of 18-24s anyway.

When I was in high school, the cool and respected people in my fandoms were the ones in their 30s happily posting their fanfics and fanart, but now it seems to be the other way around where now they're reviled and seen as automatically "creepy" or "have taxes to pay/kids to raise" even though most of us want to stick in our own corner and have been in these communities for over a decade anyway.

No. 332812

I'm 33, but I haven't had friends since elementary and have been a shut in neet for the past decade so I don't feel that old at all. Especially since I don't want to get married and have kids and have never been in a relationship.

No. 332819

Same anon, the only difference is that I am not a neet.

No. 332820

Same except 27

No. 332830

Jesus christ anon, in the kindest way possible, please snap out of it. Deranged trolling has skewed your perception of desirability. The idea that you’re too old to risk leaving a relationship is part of the incel cope for actually unwanted, unsavoury men. Sort things out with your partner and break up if needed. You don’t want to be miserable in the future saying “I married my husband because I didn’t think I could get another boyfriend at 28”. Do whichever so you can come back to reality and rebuild your self esteem.

And stop taking obvious lies meant to insult you at face value or as the truth. It’s group effort negging to make you easier to trap because men fear joining that huge population of leftover men (demographic most prone to suicide). Literally all straight men are attracted to 30s women, it’s just bitter resentment and posturing that make some say otherwise and you don’t want to even know those types, so don’t worry about their rhetoric. You won’t have trouble dating. Any jaded incel will tell you that when his rage settles back into sadness. Old men stuck on “20-24” y.os aren’t looking to treat any woman well either.

Finally, instead of fearing 30 and feeling old when you’re not, picture yourself decades ahead looking back on yourself today. Do those felt limitations still make sense? What would actually make you happy to do now? Sorry if I was condescending, I just can’t stand seeing the manipulation grip women.

No. 332837

I'm turning 28 very soon and for the most part I'm not worried. I'm living somewhere away from my hometown, in a group house but I really like all my roommates.

I'm employed in a sector I want to build a career in, and I'm making strides with my mental health with regular counselling.

The only thing that gets me down is that I haven't been in a "real relationship" since I was 15/16. Inb4 someone says that wasn't a teenage relationship isn't real, but we dated for a year, I was there when his mother died and we lost our virginity together so idk it felt real to me.

In that time I didn't have sex for about 9 years, and since then I've only had one/two night stands. I'm trying to put myself out there by using dating apps regularly, but as we all know 90% of those people ghost you and everyone I've met from apps has been incredibly mid (hence the one/two night stands).

Everyone I meet organically offline is already in relationships so it feels like all the good ones are already taken kek.

I'm uncertain if I want to ever settle down and have a family, but I would be lying if those thoughts really haven't started cropping up more and more in these last few months.

No. 332838

my 00s sucked, my 10s sucked more, my 20s sucked less but still sucked and my 30s gonna be good.

No. 332842

Aging is only bad if you have nothing going on in your life. If you have a career, a job or at least interests you're improving yourself at aging won't be scary at all.
Even reading through posts you can see that the only women who are afraid of aging are the ones who are obviously not happy with how their lifes are at the moment. Aging on its own isn't a bad thing and I wish you guys would realize the issue isn't that you're 30+ but that you have no friends, no social skills and no qualifications. You've spent your whole life oin online spaces doing nothing and instead of coping, you should quit and go outside.
Stop posting on lolcow. Stop going on 4chan. Shut your computer down and go do something with your life. It's really pathetic to be 30+ and have nothing in your life.

No. 332849

Something interesting that happened to me once I hit 27ish. I started returning to my old/true self. Like waaay back me, age 12, peak cringe, no concept of existing for the male gaze or masking. Obviously I don’t have the mind of a child but it’s my personality, like I was asleep this whole time and woke up. I get angry sometimes by all of the horrors derived from me being a fake version of myself through my late teens and 20s. Attracting disgusting people and trauma in the hope of being liked. As you get older something just switches and you don’t really give a fuck about being liked by losers anymore. It’s nice.

No. 332850

Completely agree anon, I'm turning 29 soon and my mental health and emotional stability improves every year, it's incredible how few fucks I have to give about others perceptions of me, and I look forward to losing even more fucks as the years go on

No. 332862

This post isn't about aging.

I never used to have it in my head that I was raped, because I blamed myself for it. Even though I said no many times and tried to push him off, I somehow got it in my head that I sent the wrong signals. I was married to him, after all (I got married before I was 21, do not recommend.) I was reading an article on rape in history and it seems so cliché but all these things flooded in. I have an impeccable memory and yet - my brain hid these experiences from the common record. It took that article to make me remember so much. I've been raped. I've been assaulted prior to that. Numerous times. I've never given enthusiastic consent to a man aside from a handful of times (trying to make marriage work - can't call that anything but mutual, though I hated it). I was a virgin when I got married. And now I don't even know if I have a sexuality.

Why were we blamed so much for what men did to us? Why was our childhood and coming of age a miasma of guilt and shame? I am not envious of younger women but dismayed that in my 30s I see how abused and neglected we were as young women. How I was brought up to feel only shame, despite being a "good girl." I got married to an abuser to escape an abusive household environment. And now I'm alone. I don't care how old I am now. I care about those of us who will never have the support we deserved. It's just so sad.

The romanticization of mental illness and trauma among well… people my age and younger, too, has also made it harder to feel OK about asking for help or addressing some of the wounds. I guess it should feel easier, but instead it feels like if I got through life this far, I should be able to continue.

Do we ever get to stop sacrificing and compromising for a little while? Sometimes I look back at things I have accomplished and I can't even acknowledge I did them. It's like I have no idea how I produced those things. That's not dissociation or anything, just a profound and perpetual inadequacy no matter what. Is it that people our age needed external validation to thrive? and if we didn't get that, if we hopped from abuse to abuse to demented boss to demented superviaor, we ended up so fucking broken and sad that we can't even own the products of our own toil? I can't relate or respond to any of these self-empowerment things: they are all so fake and shallow. Am I too old? Too aware? How do you fix this mindset of never feeling good about yourself as a 30+ woman?

No. 332875

It's irritating when you have a legitimate mental illness you had professionally diagnosed and treated, you open up about it a little among people you know and trust, and some fucker with an anime profile picture who won't shut the fuck up about breakcore and Lain is like "Yeah man, I'm also really fucked up; I'm a twisted cycle path too!"

No. 332880

I’m not sure how to help you, but I wanted to say I had a similar experience and you’re not alone.

I was 20, about to turn 21 when I started an immediately serious relationship with a 33 year old. He raped me on Christmas. It took me a while to understand it was rape - he was upset about an ex that he last heard from around Christmas. I was tired and high, I didn’t want sex at all. He forced himself on me despite my being obviously uninterested and very annoyed about it. I sort of just laid down and let it happen after a few minutes of light struggling and saying no. I remember thinking afterwards “was that rape?”. Brushed it under the rug and stayed with him for another three years. I wish I had respected myself more between the ages of 20-23. I’m 28 now. Wasting my early 20s with that guy is my biggest regret. Should have been enjoying myself instead

Another horrible aspect of that relationship - while I was drunk on one of our first nights together I let him give me a small stick n poke on my hip. He carved his name next to it with a knife. I thought it was so romantic and edgy, since he also said that way nobody would want me again knowing I belong to him. The next year I let him do the same on my knee, again while fucked up. Now I have to live with those and see them every time I take off my clothes and it makes me sick

No. 332885

This is the best part of being over 30 for me. I think the fact that my 30+ IRLs tend to be sticks in the mud and convinced that their life is over makes me want to be more openly "me" to show you can still have fun. I don't even consider being over 30 old, I feel like 45 or 50+ is what's really old. Why are we arbitrarily deciding our lives are over?

No. 332889

If you look at some famous actresses, some got their best roles in their 30s, not their 20s. Not only that, they look absolutely elegant and just as beautiful as they did in their 20s. I think about this a lot. 20s are essentially a continuation of teenage years, brain forms around 25, then 30s are the true prime years if you care for yourself in your 20s. Moids/incels love 20-somethings because they are essentially close to being teens, naive, easier to manipulate, and less sure of themselves. It’s a sad fact but also empowering. So many women simply blossom in their 30s. I look at photos of my mother in her 30s and she was absolutely stunning, so elegant and beautiful, and if one didn’t know her age you could assume she was 25 throughout the entire duration of her 30s. Nearing 50, and she is still gorgeous, with the added aspect of looking wiser, calmer, and kinder. Imo women aren’t even old until 50.

What really irks me is the zoomer generation and their obsession with “old” people - they seriously act like 25+ is geriatric. I wonder if any of them have the self awareness to recognize they’re right behind us, and their 20s will fly by. I hope they’ll be able to cope okay when they start hitting that milestone… it’s sad thinking all around.

No. 332891

>As you get older something just switches and you don’t really give a fuck about being liked by losers anymore.
Yes. To the young padawans lurking itt, that right there is the best part of aging. You just don't give a fuck. You carve your own path. It feels great.

No. 332893

We should start including photos of our favorite actresses, singers, models, seriously whomever is 30+ and inspiring in this thread. So many amazing women over the age of 30. Taylor Swift is obviously killing it. Lana is in her 30s and simply thriving. Phoebe Bridgers (iirc) is around 29, and absolutely stunning and growing more and more popular by the day. Anyone have any 30+ fave ladies they’d like to share?

No. 332898

I felt very old seeing a teen in public wearing a 3 cheers for sweet revenge hoodie. I told her in passing I was at the show and she said “I wish I was alive then
That made me feel old kek. But beyond that, dirty thirty is doing me well. I dont mind getting older.

No. 332900

It really depends on where you are in life, but generally this is true for the average person because by 30 you likely have a set job and schedule, some savings, a stable living situation. 20s, especially early 20s is often full of moving for college, moving for career, job switching, financial insecurity. Of course those can happen to anyone at any time but 30s is where most people have started to become stable. Life experience too, you stop being as stressed about little things or know how to handle situations better in general

No. 332906

how are heavily edited images of manufactured women supposed to be inspiring? like of course whatserface is thriving, she's RICH. WHO CARES

No. 332908

This makes me want to throw myself into a fire, I was 13 around the time of MCR. Also who else actually hates teenagers? I can’t stand them, they’re narcissistic, evil little shits who think the world revolves around them

No. 332910

Lol calm down this random teen didn't do anything wrong.

No. 332911

you sound miserable

No. 332915

At 13 you were 100% just as cringe as the kids who like mcr now

No. 332916

>narcissistic, evil little shits who think the world revolves around them
Pretty sure it's you who's making everything about yourself by exclaiming you want to "throw myself into fire" over a teen wearing a my chemical romance hoodie which got absolutely nothing to do with you and affects you in no way whatsoever

No. 332920

thank you, nonnies, for relating to my vent. I am so sorry you both suffered with things I mentioned and I wish I could take those burdens from you.

And yes, it does sting a bit to see society bend over backwards and indulge someone's mental illness, knowing how horribly we were treated as kids. Mental illness was taboo. You didn't talk about it. Autism was flapping hands and people who memorized calendars. There wasn't nuance at all. Maybe we are stronger because of that but we can never erase the scars of growing up in that environment. And my theory is that eccentric behavior was largely tolerated up until the mid 80s. Things somehow changed then, some kind of rebound conservatism or association of strangeness / atypical behavior with drugs.

No. 332926

No. 332928

File: 1685816970322.gif (24.44 KB, 253x65, IMG_5739.gif)

Hey mcrfag, i was the OP who interacted with the teen. She was engaging, fun, and nice. Most teens suck but so do most adults. And honestly, teens are still developing and learning. A lot like us being in our 30s- we also are works in progress.
I think some teens are weird, but they have grown up in a era of social media (beyond basic myspace and blogs), they have grown up connected with smartphones, and also made it through a very isolating pandemic.
I dont mind the younger fans/ enthusiasts. I myself am a former mcrfag now. the whole gway in dresses, being sexual for a crowd of teens weirds me out
Consider it flattery theres kids loving the emo era.

No. 332968

>I've noticed as I reached 30 I've gotten a protective eye over younger girls out in public when creepy moids go near them.
That's just jealousy over not getting any attention, nothing more. Be honest with yourself.

I think humans were never meant to live this long and it's all pretty much done and over after 30. For reference I'm 37, and while my life is perfectly in order there's really nothing out there anymore. You run the gamut on all experiences and human interactions by the time you go over thirty, and everything beyond that is just a boring and predictable slog. Yes you can do dumb shit and travel, party, pick up hobbies and so on but it's all just a smokescreen that hides utter boredom. Everyone knows it and nobody has the guts to admit it, but it's the truth. None of this has anything to do with youth or beauty per se, but the way humanity is. There's a hard limit on how much emotional content there is in life.

No. 332970

I think you're just depressed.

No. 332971

Um… I'm 21 myself and I've been getting sexually harassed by old ugly moids since 14. It's never a good thing or something to be jealous of because you're not preyed upon. Those men always choose the meek young women because they think we won't say anything.

No. 332973

Depression completely evaporated out of me by the time I was 22 or so. No Nonna, I really mean it - there's a hard limit to emotional content one can have in life and it covers everything from depression to blissful happiness. It all becomes a samey experience in the end, you stop feeling strongly because you are intellectually aware of how emotions come and go, and you've experienced them all many, many times.

The point I was making is that that hag, and I'm an even older hag, is "looking out" for younger women out of jealousy and a desire to sabotage potential relationships and happiness (no matter how transitory) that can develop between a man and a woman. She's just clothing this in some bogus sentiment about how she's an oh so noble and motherly mamma bear. It's all just a lie.

Take care of yourself, by yourself. Only you know how to do that and what is right or wrong for you. Every "motherly" hag is a piece of shit and I struggled a lot to come to that conclusion about myself too. Older women will always try to sabotage the younger with their "good intentions." Be careful out there. Men are predictable, other women are more sinister and insidious, and vicious.

No. 332974

I'd rather kill 100 older men than fuck 1 older man, no young woman is going to ever have a relationship with a creep she's being chased by in the streets. I also love "hags", older women are so interesting to talk to because they've gone through so much and know so much more than I do. At the hospital I work at, I always interact with great older women and it's so nice hearing about their experiences and the advices they have for me. They always offer me stuff and try to care for me and my other female coworkers.

No. 332977

NTA but what's there to even "sabotage"..there is no happiness in older man younger women relationships. 99% of the time it doesn't work out and someone gets groomed or abused.

No. 332978

You just sound like a miserable person tbh. Of course you’ll feel that way when this is how you choose to think about life.

No. 332980

God imagine being friends with someone like you. You probably make everyone around you suicidal

No. 332981

This hag talk is quite suspicious.
I really value the friendships I have with some much older women btw, everyone is different and many are kind and supportive to younger women
>think women helping other women who are being creeped on are jealous

No. 332993

So…you are boring?

No. 332995

elderly moids on lolcow? more likely than you'd think

No. 333002

t.old moid hands typed this

No. 333005

>20s are essentially a continuation of teenage years, brain forms around 25, then 30s are the true prime years if you care for yourself in your 20s. Moids/incels love 20-somethings because they are essentially close to being teens, naive, easier to manipulate, and less sure of themselves.
I think 20+ year olds are still adults, but I do judge anyone past their 20s who only date 18-24 year olds, I find younger adults so unattractive and baby-faced. I think I'm more attractive now than I was when I was 22.

>What really irks me is the zoomer generation and their obsession with “old” people - they seriously act like 25+ is geriatric.

I notice the current generation in their early 20s now are more immature than the people who were 20 a decade ago. When I was in my early 20s I didn't have a second thought about being 25-30+ one day, but to zoomers it's the end of the world. I'm looking forward to the rest of my thirties but my least favorite thing about it is you're either put in the boxes of "too old"/"a hag" or a "MILF"/"cougar".

I can't even put into words how retarded this post is.

No. 333007

Why did so many of you respond to moid bait? Have none of you heard of report and ignore?

No. 333011

sorry but its fun to insult them.

No. 333018

they're probably jerking off to your """insults""" and you're just shitting up the thread and encouraging them by giving them attention. integrate or go back.

No. 333051

File: 1685852204066.png (161.38 KB, 522x366, 132.PNG)

I'm 50. Weirdly, it's really great as everyone my age is old and an uggo. And if you do the bare minimum of looking after yourself and getting some exercise in, everything is really peachy. (Also you have more money so that is a plus).

I found this is the age when all the ex-boyfriends of my teens and early twenties start trying to get back into contact. I've put effort in to getting back into contact with my unrequited crush, who has grown up to be a wonderful man (sadly married, as I am, so we have a platonic friendship). Now that the bulk of family stuff is over, you can go back to doing the stuff you REALLY liked, but without the weight of "what are you gonna do with your life" hanging over your head. Sure, there's a bit of retirement planning, but this is the BEST time.

No. 333055

great thread idea. I'm 33. It's awesome. I have a career and money and live the life I want to live. Had to go through a lot of shit to get here.

No. 333059

I turned 30 and literally nothing changed, please stfu and stop reinforcing scrotey talk points that women are over the hill and it’s over for them once they turn 30, you sound like an incel.

No. 333074

Can you older nonnas tell me where you were at 25 vs where you are now? I need a glimmer of hope.

No. 333077

No Zoomers welcome here, go elsewhere

No. 333080

At 25 I was in an abusive relationship with a piece of shit scrote and wasting away in a windowless cubicle. Wanted to kms but was too busy working to really think about how bad things were. Now I’m 30, in a healthy relationship (started at 26 and still going strong), work from home and get to do whatever I want with my time. I still have struggles but I’m happy and even though I’m not rich at all, there isn’t much I want that I don’t or can’t have (main thing is a house but that’s like 90% of people my age so I don’t feel too bad)

No. 333081

nta but she was literally defending you kek, priorities?

No. 333087

It's the same moid pretending to be a "jealous bitter hag" that he accused older women of being. He's mad I said no young woman want an old expired male, kek.

No. 333090

No, it’s not. I just don’t think anyone under 26/27 should be welcome in this thread - go ahead and lurk, but this thread is for women nearing 30 or over 30. We don’t need commentary from 21 year olds on here regardless of what it is. Imo 21 is still a child, they can go elsewhere and leave the discourse to the adults.

No. 333091

This is refreshing and we’re happy to have you here! Thank you

No. 333092

This is toxic, leave this thread. Your thinking is exactly what perpetuates the stereotypes. Get help. Fix your thinking. Seek therapy, but don’t spread your bullshit rhetoric here.

No. 333093

They don’t have to be heavily edited kek, I just said anyone over 30 who is inspiring to you. You sound mad. Not every 30+ woman is thriving because they have money. I said literally anyone who inspires you.

No. 333094

It’s not about the random teen, it’s teens in general. Have you spent any decent amount of time around teens as an adult? They are insufferable to be around, and they think they’re so obscure, so cool, act like they know everything, and in general are narcissistic. I’m not saying all of them. But most of them. Especially in this age of social media. They sort of disgust me now.

No. 333098

This thread should be a celebration of aging as women, something rare yet necessary. Stop bringing your seething about younger generations into it.

No. 333105

25 - living in hometown, awful relationship with ex, no assets, no therapy, depressed
Now - new city, married, homeowner, regular therapy, less depressed

No. 333111

I turn 33 this year. I like being in my 30s. I feel I grew into my features and started caring about exercise and form that I've got a better body than I did in my 20s. I style myself better. I've more sense and I'm more financially secure. I feel like I get listened too and treated with respect the more I age and I can also bullshit people easier because I rarely get challenged. I've got years of experience of being a snarky bitch and putting men in their place when they talk down to me or try to act obnoxious. I'm extremely content with myself.

No. 333118

This website isn't for old expired males. I'd rather kill an old man than kiss him. Go seethe harder.

No. 333137

I’m not sure who you think you’re replying to, but I’m not a male, and I literally said the thread is for women

No. 333144

I'm not old but at 25 I was struggling to be employed, on a cocktail of meds that made me dissociated from reality, and going through an eating disorder. At 31 I've been having a steady (albeit annoying sometimes) job, my lifestyle is more healthy/natural besides the electronics, and while I struggle with a social life in the middle of nowhere I'm not living in my head constantly.

This is also just a general discussion for 30+ women, this isn't all femcel whining over "hitting the wall". Plenty of posts are happy besides the bait.

No. 333148

File: 1685886484519.jpeg (154.08 KB, 1200x1800, IMG_8230.jpeg)

Noémie Merlant. Saw her in Baby Ruby yesterday, she had this youthful energy about her and I was assuming she was mid-20s. She’s actually 34! Pictures don’t do her justice, she’s gorgeous in motion. Also loved her at 30/31 in Portrait of a Lady on Fire.

She also actively speaks out about the objectification of women.

No. 333153

File: 1685887764145.jpeg (7.36 KB, 299x169, IMG_8231.jpeg)

Adèle Haenel, speaking of Lady on Fire. Currently 34, 30 at the time of this pic. Recently quit the film industry openly due to their complacency towards sexual predators. Was manipulated and sexually abused at a young age and was very open about what happened. Lovely woman all around, and so strikingly beautiful

No. 333154

with 25 I was unemployed, couldn't leave the house, depressed, suicidal and just got kicked from university. Now in my 30s I have an education, will soon have a nice job and my mental health is like "healthy". I'm not suicidal anymore, only a little bit depressed, but I'm doing better than ever. Sure, there are one or two things that are still a struggle for me and I regret stuff, but back then I didn't know any better, as I didn't have any help from the outside and fought my battles alone. Best thing about being older, I don't care what most people think about me anymore and it's so nice to just be who you are without trying to impress someone. There is always hope if you let it happen and if you try to change the things that make you feel miserable.

No. 333157

Turning 28 in a month. I honestly don't care about reaching 30. I only regret that mental illness has stolen so many years from me but it's getting better.

I'm getting an education so I hope that by 30-35 I'll have moved out and work a job that I can tolerate. That's all I want from life.

No. 333183

Thank you, nonnas! You give me hope.

No. 333185

Saw the video recently where she left an award show because they gave an award to that fucking paedophile Polanski - I hope she have great success in whichever field she enters next

No. 333189

Is it possible to turn your life around at 30? Has anyone done it? I don't know if I'm being a doomer or if my life is actually fucked forever because I destroyed my 20s. Everyone I know is getting married and starting to have kids and get real careers. I've improved a lot (compared to the mess I used to be) but I feel so behind and the insecurity is driving me insane.

No. 333193

The older I get the easier it gets. Plan ahead a little but not too much, don't be too dumb, focus on understanding what genuinely makes you happy as long as you don't get dumb chasing happiness (I am talking like, dont develop a drug problem, but notice if a nice organized space or a certain genre of book just feels satisfying to you etc for me it is a good structured routine and power tools) l. Mid twenties was very hard. Childhood was harder but my late 20s I am the happiest ive ever been. I suspect happiness can increase indefinitely with age as long as you pay attention to your own inner workings and work toward what drives you. Even hard times feel easier if you have that. Granted I havent lived past 30s so idk what the future holds for me, but looking forward I see only more positivity.

No. 333195

history is full of late bloomers, you may not have come anywhere near your peak yet. you can do anything at nearly any age once you're an adult. tons of people have had a eureka moment in their 40s and 50s and started a successful business/hustle or invented some random knick knack that made them a millionaire.

or just work a normal job and save up. there is gonna be a big market collapse during the 2020s for sure, dont invest shit right now wait for the next great depression and get into the market after a bubble pop and wait for things to rebound. gonna be a huge tech bubble pop soon mark my words.

No. 333214

My best friend was basically unemployed long term NEET, dateless, loser until she was 33. Then she suddenly met a guy, got married, had a kid and went back to college all in the space of 2 years. I have seen people turn their lives around, it’s never too late.

No. 333225

Out of sheer curiousity, is she happy? Was it a "jump on the opportunity because I might never have this chance again" type of situation?

No. 333243

I don't understand anons on other boards who act like there's an age limit for using an imageboard of all things. I also noticed a weird increase in shitting on women in this age range ever since the thread was made.

No. 333244

Yeah do they plan to stop using LC when they turn 30-40? Like you turn a certain age and suddently you're magically super normie? Not going to happen. Many of us grew up on imageboards, after all.

No. 333246

Exactly. During downtime I’d rather be here than on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, etc.

No. 333250

Me, they're awful. I was also a shitty teenager too

No. 333269

first thing is that you have to ask yourself what you want from life. Do you want children, marriage, a career and so on? And if you see what you want, you can clearly turn you life around. I got my education in my 30s after losing my 20s to mental illness, I never wanted children or marriage, so I didn't miss out on that, but I can say that you can turn your life around as I did it myself and I know many other women that changed their life completely after reaching 30.

No. 333270

Ageism is only a reflection of fear. Especially for under 25 whose brains aren’t developed and are warped by social media, they truly feel as if they’ll never age and the reality of it is literally incomprehensible until you reach like 27. So they turn those feelings into fear and antagonizing people who remind them of their fear. I just laugh because the reality is that being 30+ is not even 1/5 as bad as society tries to make it seem

No. 333271

it's so interesting as many of them missed out on the fun times you had back then when social media wasn't even a thing and not every picture went through photoshop or filters. These tiny websites, these small communities for one special interest, horrible self made blogs, the minutes a huge picture needed to be fully visible and the sound of your modem connecting you to the internet. And with the years all of the users of LC will get older if it still exists in the future.

No. 333276

I basically wasted my teens and 20s and managed to turn around to getting my life on track to something more normal right before I turned 30. I think there's hope.

No. 333277

Dang why was everyone in this thread having a horrible time at 25. Happy for you all though since it sounds like you're doing better. It's nice to see older women online because it really does feel like people think we should evaporate at 30 or only have mommy Instagram pages.

No. 333278

samefag but I hate that I naturally typed the world older as if 30s are even old

No. 333309

>why was everyone in this thread having a horrible time at 25
I wasn't, through I had my own ups and downs over the years of course. They are just replying to >>333189 and >>333074 who asked specifically for people who overcame their troubled 20's

No. 333321

I'm in my late 20s and I truly want to be in my 30s so badly because I know I'll be more stable then. I'm aware it's a process and I should make the best of it/enjoy the moment as I go along, but it's truly excruciating and painful some days. I'm loads better now than I was in my early 20s, and I was barely alive in my teens, so it's not like there isn't an upwards trend. I'm just very tired. As irrational as it may seem, I feel like relative peace and stability is waiting for me past 30 and I want it to just arrive already.

No. 333328

I turned 31 this year and I sure hope so. Do you ever talk to your friends about this feeling? I recently had a discussion like this with an older friend who basically has it all. It's really life affirming to hear people you care about or even just admire say out loud that they appreciate all the different types of people in their lives and honor their unique experiences and paths, regardless of deviation from the status quo. It's so easy to get caught up in culturally scheduled milestones, but age really doesn't have to be relevant to the quality of your relationships or other sources of fulfillment.

No. 333372

Does anyone feel like they’ve lost their looks/the currency of attractiveness over 30? It’s one of my fears in regards to leaving my 20s…

No. 333377

No, you only lose attractiveness to predatory moids.

No. 333384

No. You will look exactly the same with minimum self care like eating healthy food, doing some kind of physical activity, sleeping enough, hopefully not being in extremely high stress environment or picking up a substance abuse problem. when I look back through photos I looked my worst at 26-29 because of a high stress job and nightly drinking to "unwind", but 30-33 I looked good again (better than my early 20s actually) because I left that job and started taking care of myself. all that generic health advice is true by the way, hope you're taking care of your health.

No. 333404

I'm about to turn 31 and I'm definitely in the best place of my life so far. I don't work shitty jobs anymore, I'm finishing school, I ditched my sex obsessed moid. I think there's a confidence that comes with more life experience, I'm way more independent and willing to try new things, I'm going traveling at the end of the year and I have more time to take care of my body. Younger ladies in your 20's I hope you all embrace all the great things that come with entering your 30s. I completely did a 180 at around 28, if you're worried about "stalling" in life it's absolutely not too late.

No. 333406

Nah I look and feel better than ever. Like nonnie said here >>333384, invest in health. When I was I was in my early 20s I didn't do much physically. But once you start working out and get toned, or any muscle gains, you'll look and feel so much better. And now I can afford to choose better quality clothing.

I stopped doing 98% of my make up except some little liner and mascara, but no longer use foundation or anything that cakes on. Just obsessively use sunscreen and a skincare routine. Looking back I regret using so much make up because thats just what everyone else did. Personally, most women look perfectly fine naturally imo. Take care of your skin and you'll be fine. And just the ignore the minority of loser redpilled scrotes who say women hit the wall at 25.

No. 333409

I finally filled out at 32. My body looks better than in my 20s with very basic exercise and eating heaps of veggies. I've got a bit of volume loss in the face but it's not noticeable if I'm hydrated and use HA lotion.
You just have to be a little more intentional in your 30s.

Yes! I haven't needed to drag my husband or male friend everywhere to ward off horny pests for a few years. I'm so much more relaxed in public now.

No. 333443

At 25 I was dating and so humiliatingly in love with a manipulative, cheating addict, had no job + I had my degree but was too depressed to do anything with it, was living with my dad in a two-bedroom apartment. I was an alcoholic to the point that I had pretty severe physical symptoms and my 26th birthday I got so embarrassingly shit-canned at National Harbor that I don’t think I can go back to like any establishment there (including the Peeps store.) I’m 30 now and haven’t talked to the abusive ex in any capacity in three years - which is a feat because I literally was so brainwashed I believed my only reason to live was to love him. I started a really good career at 27 and got the 6 figure salary promotion a few weeks after my 29th birthday. I bought a house with my Nigel, who is a good and kind and trustworthy man who has a real job and real priorities. I’m 2 years and 7 months sober.

I still get depressed, and at 30 and sober it’s different and hard now for me to reconcile. I thought if I fixed my life’s circumstances things would get better and they did, significantly, but there’s still that nagging feeling with the added pressure that I have so so so so much to lose now if I were to ever backslide. I also have this complex around my looks because when I was constantly fucking up everything around me, at the very least I was always fuckable. It’s hard that I can see myself aging and to know that I’m losing it little by little - hair’s thinning, varicose veins, little bit of turkey neck, etc. I think I always knew that aging would fuck with me but I had hoped I would’ve made my peace with it by now, but I guess I have a backlog of things to work through that I just drank about for 15 years. I think I’ll get there eventually though. There’s still so much time.

No. 333457

I am turning 32 in a few months from now and I'm trying to turn my life around. I'm so behind everything due to years of depression, falling for troon bullshit and neetdom. I'm trying to get in college to get a career. I'd like to have a relationship but I don't really feel this is so urgent as I used to when I was in my late teens/early 20s. Like, I'm open to it but not looking that deep because I know I have to fix up my problems and have at least a bit of economic stability before I can accomodate a partner or whatever and I am not interested in casual relationships at all. So I don't feel so bad about not having a kid or being married/dating because I know it could only end badly in my current situation. I never really thought badly on being single probably because my family never pressured me into a relationship, quite the opposite, my mom always told me to not have kids so soon and also to not marry a guy like my dad kekk. My dad reinforced these teachings by just being himself. I guess that really saved me from being stuck with some retard and a kid.
I expect to get into college next year and I guess if I'm unable to for whatever reason I can still get a job. I don't know what exactly I could be doing if I don't get into college, never planned that far because I'm always afraid of making too many plans and having none of them coming to fruition. All I know is that I just can't keep living like a man, wasting my life doing absolutely nothing. Besides I have my mom to take care of.

On the bright side, I look much better nowadays than in my teens and early 20s. I mean, yeah, I am kinda ugly but I grew into my features and don't look so awkward anymore. Also I don't care anymore about what people think of my choices of wardrobe, I dress whatever I want and I made peace with the fact there are some things I can't change and there is no reason to change them. If not for other people making me feel this way, I don't think I'd ever feel uncomfortable in my skin, and I know that now, which really killed any desires I had during my early teens/20s to change my body in any way, plastic surgery would never fix the issues I have, it would only make them worse. Oh, and I don't have this fear I had during my teens of getting older anymore, I just don't care.
All I miss about being a teen is not having this fucked back. Also I regret not exercising in my 20s.

No. 333461

No, I feel like I've gotten more attractive. I take better care of myself, dress nicer (when I can afford it), my face is more mature. I honestly think I looked awful in my 20s.

No. 333463

I started with real skincare in my early 30s and let me tell you, my skin never looked better. I never smoked and avoided the sun like hell, so that might have helped, but honestly, my skin is glowing now, minimal wrinkles, no anorexic face lines anymore and I just look healthy and younger than I looked in my mid 20s. And the best part is, you stop caring what people think about you and that will attract the right friends/partners. Don't be afraid, you will love being in your 30s, you just don't have any fucks to give anymore and that will make you way more attractive for the right people.

No. 333464

I think that one reason why many of us had horrible 20s is that there wasn't anyone really talking about mental health and how important it is to get the right help at the right time. At my school I was the first one to self harm (tiny school in the middle of nowhere), no one even considered getting or making me see a shrink. Today everyone seems to have some mental illness and everyone is talking about it. Not that it's in any way better, but I guess that being able to talk about these struggles and knowing that there is help, would have made the life of many of us better. I also think that many people would like for women to disappear after they turn 30, as if we are dead after that age and this thread is very refreshing to see. I've met some amazing women that were in their 40s to 60s, more confident and self-loving than I've seen any other woman before.

No. 333483

Just piling on to squash your illogical fear. I also look the best I ever have at 30. I got braces at 27/off at 29 so that was a big part of it but I also nailed down my skincare and style and everything else that you slowly work on through your 20s. Basically by 30 you should mostly figure out what enhances your appearance and what doesn’t. Take care of your health, stretch, and drink water. Keeping your looks is not hard but it requires consistency.

No. 333485

The absolute best part about being 30+ is giving less fucks. I was so insecure in my 20's. Now I have less fucks to give and it's truly a blessing. Happy ageing, nonas.

No. 333488

This is the best thread I've read in some time. I appreciate nonnas coming together to speak positively on aging with strong personal anecdote… I'm not young by any means myself, but it truly means a lot to read.

No. 333504

Nayrt but would you mind sharing your skincare routine? Ive done a mild routine (as in wash daily, moisturize, usually use sunscreen, occasional basic clay mask) thru my 20s but idk my skin is changing and I am not sure what to do now.

No. 333529

Does the dating pool get better in your 30s nonnas? I've lost all hope for 99% of men in their 20s

No. 333535

This, it's like a switch flipped in mu brain and I suddenly acquired a sense of style. Just turned 30 and it rocks.

No. 333554

>I think that one reason why many of us had horrible 20s is that there wasn't anyone really talking about mental health and how important it is to get the right help at the right time.
It wasn't like that for me. I was diagnosed with mental issues as a kid, so "getting help", "finding the right medication/therapist" and "being diagnosed with [disorder]" was basically my personality in my teens and 20s. Mental health treatment for so long ironically made me worse, I only got better past age 25 when I matured mentally and started examining the root of my problems.

No. 333557

I’m 35 and stopped drinking six months ago because I could feel it taking its toll on me as I was sometimes prone to binge drinking on weekends. Now I’m doing a lifting program at the gym and upped my skincare routine and I’m feeling much better about myself physically. I have a ton of insecurity in general though because my hobbies are mostly fandom related and my best friend is a decade younger than me. I still function as an adult and everything but sometimes I’m ashamed of these facts and I’m not sure if I should be. I also try to be normie enough to not come off as weird. I think the hardest thing about being a 30+ women is not internalizing the bullshit messages about already being “over the hill”. Like good god I’ve barely started, I’m not on my fucking deathbed.

No. 333621


Sadly not, moids are shit as soon as they hit puberty and it never ends.
Women in 30s tend to say "All good men are taken by now" but from what I have seen a lot of women who started their relationship early in their 20s and settle with their moids have come to peace with eating shit.

Also women who get to 30s and go into panic mode so they settle for a moid also give up and eat a lot of shit.

The only way is to learn to be content with being alone and only accept a moid in your life if he brings value. Age does not matter.

No. 333631

Unfortunately this was me. I dated the same guy for around eleven years and he was promising in the beginning but things very slowly declined and now I’m leaving. He just stopped seeming to care about ever wanting more out of life, and I’m not cool with that. We were engaged at one point but I couldn’t go through with it because I thought even being on my own would be better than being someone who just stopped caring, and honestly I think it is better. I see some of my married friends in similar situations who are absolutely miserable and just went through with it because they felt like they had to. I didn’t want to end up like that, and I think way too many people settle just because they’ve been with the same person for so long. Anyway, if you’re a younger nona don’t make my mistake. Get out early while you can at any sign of something not going the way you want.

No. 333636

Thank you for all of your responses. I’m really happy I started this thread, it’s exactly what I was hoping for. I feel so much better about approaching 30 now thanks to you ladies and your wisdom. You’re all lovely and inspiring.

No. 333643

File: 1686059203997.jpeg (129.09 KB, 680x1019, IMG_8236.jpeg)

Gal Gidot is 38 and grew into her features so beautifully. Imo she looks even better than she did in her 20s, and it seems her career straight skyrocketed when she entered her 30s. Incel moids drool over her as Wonder Woman and I don’t think it even clicks for them that she’s well into her 30s lol

No. 333644

File: 1686059492859.jpeg (68.58 KB, 634x896, IMG_8239.jpeg)

Elizabeth Olsen is 34, and I recently saw a movie from years ago when she was in her 20s. She looked exactly the same. She was also stunning in Love & Death

No. 333646

File: 1686059663390.jpeg (464.02 KB, 2048x2048, IMG_8240.jpeg)

Margot Robbie - has looked exactly the same for the last decade. Playing Barbie at 32. She always looks so full of life and like she’s just enjoying every year to the fullest, and always excelling. Love her.

No. 333651

My 20s were much easier, life has really thrown a wrench at me this last decade (just turned 40). Life events specific to me though so it'd be different for everyone. Hope it's better for you

No. 333659

Reading this thread as a 22 year old is like going on 4chan, it's a boost to my ego seeing how fucked some of you truly are.
Also it's fucking hilarious how some of you are more worried about looking older than not having your own house or a nice paying job at your 30s.(bait)

No. 333660

Like scrotechan? Nice bait sis.

No. 333666

Men are really stupid. They don’t realize how many celebrities they lust over aren’t just turned 18 virgins or even women in their twenties. They love to go on and on about how you instantly become a hag at 30 (or even 25 in some cases) when for most people there is not a major change in how they look, and for some people things get even better because you learn more about how to take care of yourself, what styles you like and look good in, etc. I think they just hate that by that age, most women have wizened up to male stupidity, so they’re desperate to bring us down a notch.

No. 333668

If you think it's a bait, why are you replying? Also sis? Kek. Did you come from some underground tea forum?
Also this thread is filled with delusional old women who are failures in life just like how 4chan is filled with old men who are failures in life. Both groups are too old to be wasting their time shit-posting instead of trying to improve their lifes and both groups have mental disorders or underlying traumas that make it hard for them to fit in.
Instead of being worried about serious things, both groups care more about how they're perceived as unattractive and romantically undesirable
>>333666 post is an example as she types paragraphs being angry some incel told her that she's no longer hot. Normal women don't care about pedo incels, only losers like you guys do.(infighting)

No. 333672

No one said you can’t be worried about multiple things. And many women on this entire board do have good jobs and houses, you might realize that if you weren’t a newfag and paid attention to more conversations in other threads. I think the looks/relationship thing is getting brought up so much because those are the things society criticizes women for the most, even over career or finances, which are things men experience more criticism for. It’s really not rocket science, and it’s not necessarily being discussed because every person here has a failed relationship or can’t get one or whatever. Most of us realize how much worth society places on those things and have also been able to recognize issues with having low expectations in relationships as well. You’re a child right now, so maybe someday you’ll get it if you aren’t one of those idiots who think turning thirty is the worst thing that could happen to a woman and don’t kill yourself first. Somehow I think you are, calling anyone over thirty “old” and expecting that everyone will have the same life experience. Things happen. I also thought my life was going to be perfect at 22 and that I was better than everyone else. Hope the fall isn’t too hard for you.

No. 333679

Can we not do this? The whole "Look! Here is a woman who's over 30 and still pretty! Look, here's a woman who's 32 and went back to school, that's INSANE!"

No. 333682

Weird take. Most of the posts in this thread are positive and about how our lives turned around in our 30s, but when I read other threads here it's usually the 18-26 crowd who are posting about being NEETs and having no social skills.

No. 333684

I agree. 30's is still young, it's like those anons are talking about women twice as old. And I don't think we should post like that about 60+ yo women either, being beautiful shouldn't be the main thing to admire about other women.

No. 333686

Agreed re:beauty, I get the original nonna's intention, but the focus on having maintained youth is not a good priority. Taking care of yourself and maintaining your grooming/health is good, but those posts are skewed more towards maintaining desirability and proving to moids that women are still valuable for sex last 30.
I don't think there's anything wrong with celebrating a woman returning to school past 30, though. School is an actual important axis of self-development in most countries, and a gateway to being able to financially support yourself as an independent woman. Too many nonnas believe that just because they were put behind their peers by circumstances like mental illness or abusive relationships, they've missed their chance. It's good to show them that it's never too late.

No. 333687

Just ignore her. Like she said, she's young and likely lucky enough to not realize how easily everything can go down the drain, especially for women. Maybe she'll get to age without ever having to worry about this stuff, and if that's the case– good for her, this thread isn't for her. If not, it'll be here for her if she ever needs to hear from other women that things will be alright.

No. 333693

This is why Zoomers aren’t welcome here. It’s obvious your brain isn’t formed yet kek, get off the thread and come back when you’re a real adult

No. 333694

Really, can the mods ban this child? Calling women in their late 20s to early 30s old women? Sweetheart, you’re next. Do you realize you’re not much younger? And if you feel the need to post the uneducated garbage you’re spewing, you’re the insecure one. Get help, and stay away from this thread idiot (coming from someone only 3 years older than you, btw)

No. 333696

It’s an ego boost seeing this post because it reaffirms my belief about early 20s women thinking they’ll never age, the same way a 5 year old can’t fathom being 10 one day. The fall from grace is going to be so hard for you, and tell me, what do you have to show for your life right now? Since you’re so high and mighty. I challenge you to come back to this thread in 5 years, and tell us about your grand successes lol. The fact that you’re spending time putting down women who are, quite honestly, not that much older than you - really shows how little you have going on in your actual life. Do better. And stick to threads where you circlejerk with other 22 year olds that think they’re ageless

No. 333699

Cope harder, I'm in college and I'll be quite accomplished once I'm your age, which is all I'm working towards. I also don't care about men finding me hot or old unlike the insecure idiots here because I don't spend my time in online spaces obsessed with looks as much as you. I also don't buy into the ideology that women look worse at 30 so I won't be as pathetic as you once I'm your age. I'll see my smile wrinkles and be happy I got to smile so much, see the grays in my hair and be glad I survived those stressful moments that caused those.
I think women in their thirties are generally great, the ones I talk to irl at least they're quite shitty online just like any age group, I think the ones here are losers though. Seriously, stop caring so much about looking young or old, it really doesn't matter as much as you think. Who cares if some loser virgin guy thinks you have wrinkles? Who cares if an incel claims you're too old to be pretty? Who cares if some porn addicted moid makes fun of you for being single?
You guys literally care so much about how others think. You're spamming random 30 year old actresses and saying they're pretty. Like, what were you expecting? Do you think women all look disgusting after 30? This whole thread smells like insecure women brainwashed by incel ideologies, next thing these retards are gonna do is settle for any man or woman that shows them attention because they think they're too old for an actual person to love them genuinely. Not healthy.
I'm not saying getting older is bad, I'm saying that the mindset anons itt have isn't healthy. They're obviously very insecure and have a weird fixation on looks and youth. A woman doesn't even age that much until her late forties but since these women probably hang out in online chambers that shit on any woman's looks, they think they're grannies who have completely given up on their looks or something.

No. 333700

>it reaffirms my belief about early 20s women thinking they’ll never age
you only believe this if you spend little to no time with your grandparents. i used to live with mine, and i was never scared of aging and recognized myself as a future oldie.
multiple generations must share a house. the way we live right now, in flats and apartments, separate and "independent", is bad for humans as a species.

No. 333705

You’re agreeing with the premise of the thread but you’re being a huge bitch about it. Damn sorry some of us have insecurities how silly of us to talk about them. Fuckin A, let us work through our issues in peace.
Although I agree on the actress-posting but that’s because I cannot relate to celebrities.
No young’ns allowed. Shoo.

No. 333706

>I recognized myself as a future oldie
This feels like stolen valor coming from a 22 year old lol

No. 333710

i'm not her lol. i actually belong in this thread.

No. 333713

I agree with the premise but I disagree with the arguments anons are making. Not aging isn't a good thing and pretending to be younger than you are is futile. I'm not pretending I'm 18, I'm not trying to look younger because I know it'll only be damaging to me in the long term.
And although I agree with you and that insecurities are things you should work thorough, I think a lot of anons itt have very toxic mindsets that influence others negatively as well. I personally don't look at rich gorgeous 22 year old celebs and compare myself to them, I doubt anyone feels good about themselves when compared to a curated image of a very rich person who has means to purchase all type of beauty. A lot of anons seem to be spending way too much time in incel spaces and that's why they have very warped views. The only man that's told me women expire or that look ugly when they grow old was an abusive 50 year old unmarried man who cried to me once because he knew he'd never have a wife and a family. That's the type of man these anons are taking seriously, a genetic dead end.

No. 333721

Do you have fucking eyes or did you not see everybody disagreeing with the anon who posted all of those actresses because she missed the point of this thread? Way to go selectively filtering what you read itt so that you can burn a strawman and fuel your ego boost.
For the record, if your online behavior really was as you say it is, you wouldn't be on this thread in the first place. Go be the paragon of normiehood you see yourself as. Hopefully it'll give you some life experience and make you less of a massive asshole.

No. 333733

Since turning 30 I've been really self conscious about how my autism/strangeness manifests in choices about my appearance. I feel like I'm dressing too "young" because I like to wear unusual outfits. It's normal clothes, just like, styled unusually, not super revealing or full trad goth tier. I actually just like wearing really feminine girly clothes in light colors, but everyone around here just wears t shirts and jeans or business casual simple stuff and I am so sick of the stares when I go out. I am clean and well kept, I think I look fun and cute. But I am so insecure that people maybe have an attitude like they do toward lolitas…which is "how dare you try to look young, you're an old hag lol". I am absolutely not "trying to look young", I just like youthful styles. Ugh. Idk how to get over it and just dress how I want. Last night this insecurity peaked and I dyed over my beautiful fun colored hair with ugly brown. I've been crying and miserable since because I regret it and it's going to be so difficult to get it so light again. I know I should just get over it and not care what other people think. I want to just embrace being my full self like many people describe happens in their 30s, but it's feeling more difficult for me now that I've hit that milestone for some reason. I hope once I get my cute color back I can treat this is a lesson that trying to be "normal" isn't worth it.

No. 333777

I'm not an expert, this is just what I'm doing and I hope you research everything I write. My skin is rather dry and I mostly don't have outbreaks and stuff like that, I'm just very sensitive towards the sun.

What I do is:
- sunscreen, spf50+ every day
- I don't use foundation, only powder, eyeshadow and mascara, but I will wash it right of my face when I know I won't leave the house again
- I switch between retinol, niacinamide, vitamin c and basic moisturising creams with urea and stuff like that. Everything with no perfume, no alcohol, light textures. Not everything at once, more like one product a day and I will go at least one day without everything
- AHA or BHA peeling every two weeks or once a month, not too intense, my skin wouldn't like that
- I quit drinking alcohol, don't smoke and try to sleep at least 6 hours and drink my water, kek

That's all I can tell you. It really changed my skin and I look healthier than before. Next thing I will try is a collagen supplement and then I will see what I can do to improve my hair. I think it's important to not overdo it and slowly find what your skin needs and don't forget that it's important what you eat, if you eat like Shayna, your skin will never look healthy.

No. 333780

i've got an issue because of my autism too, i didn't even consider my clothes which are probably wrong too, but i'm concerned with how childlike and deferential i act, I'm still anxious around people and women my age end up assuming i'm younger because of the way i act, it's embarrassing when they find out i'm their age but i have no idea how to act my age, i speak like a kid and act shy, cute when you're actually a kid, embarrassing as a 30 year old… my body language is all wrong too

No. 333789

I'm 30 and my initial response to the thread was roughly the same, minus the stupid generational wars.

No. 333797

To be fair, the first handful of posts at the beginning seemed to be all normal women just saying they're happy, comfortable, and living their best normie lives while enjoying their 30s over their 20s.
You are on a imageboard after all, so the fact there's mixed bag of people ranging from the bottom struggle to the top finally living their best lives shouldn't be that surprising.

No. 333798

Stupid generational war bs from the outset- regurgitated idpol psyop bullshit and everyone who participated in it should be ashamed of themselves. You should be building bridges with other alienated women and supporting them, even if they made the grave mistake of being a few years younger than you. If you're 30 and you "hate teenagers" you are a fucking embarrassment, a product of the society that made you.

This thread is some of the saddest shit I've seen in a while and rivals being on scrotechans a dozen years ago.

No. 333804

That's like 3 people and the majority of the thread is older nonnas encouraging younger ones not to be worried about aging/talking about being happy and secure in their 30s when they didn't think they would.
Genuinely what the fuck is with the random anons coming in seething that this thread is about shit it isn't?

No. 333823

Seriously, did zoomers actually read the posts in this thread or just fixate on a few negative ones? I was happy to see most posts were positive or just talking about experiences instead of "hitting the wall" complaining.

No. 333833

I was in college at your age, too. I hope you succeed but damn, putting down others is an immature trait. Like seriously immature. This thread is literally for women to encourage each other and be supportive by sharing honest thoughts and experiences. If someone finds solace in looking at celebrities who have excelled with age, that’s just fine. If you didn’t notice, it wasn’t just looks that anon was pointing out. She was also focused on their personalities and their successes past 30, when society tells us women hit some sort of wall or become stagnant at 30. The point was missed by most of you. It’s not about their looks alone.

Your derailing the thread by insulting women here is exactly what is not okay. Just because you have such a positive view on aging, doesn’t give you permission to shit on other women who are posting on this thread hoping to find support and guidance. You really need to leave this thread. You are obviously not reading all of the posts or willing to be supportive of these women. This thread isn’t about you. It’s for women nearing 30, or above 30. So you really need to leave and stop insulting women who are here seeking support from peers. Your opinion is irrelevant here. Go somewhere else and stop fucking up the thread by being an argumentative 22 year old. For real. Leave the thread and let the women here post in peace. You’re acting like a child.

No. 333844

>damn yall anons are mentally ill and pathetic, well just so you know as a woman in her socially determined prime age I'm never going to be insecure over aging, I'm going to embrace my sexy smile lines and never feel shunned by society or pressured into just disappearing and making babies!
It's going to happen to you too, anon. The society around us hates women aged 30+ and the next time you'll be worth a shit is when you're a cute sweet grandma baking cookies and knitting sweaters, granted you actually did have children who had children on their own. Pretending like it's just a "you problem" of anons being vain is denying how much antipathy adult women face and how their only desired personality trait is to be a mommy and a wife, simultaneously being hated on for being le crusty middle aged uggo Karens jelly of sweet young women. This is a structural problem and can never be fixed if you keep blaming women for being so "insecure" as if their mindset was born in a vacuum. You'll understand when you get there.

No. 333848

nta but normies dont have neurodevelopmental disorders smartass

No. 333849

nta but stop dragging others down with you.

No. 333851

since you're desperately looking for a boost of ego, i assume your life is not going so well either.

No. 333853

File: 1686123877808.jpg (27.62 KB, 369x338, Holly_Jacobs_clothed.jpg)

>trailer swifts bangs < holly jacobs bangs

No. 333859

What "dragging others down with you"? Are you saying that recognizing how misogyny affects women is just being a dumb debbie downer who needs to lighten up? How do you ever figure we can fix issues with societal misogyny if you keep pretending it only exists between your ears and choose to bury your head in the sand instead? When I actually passed 30 It hit me full force how much people want women over that age to stop existing as individuals. There's a reason why so many normie women hurry in a panic to raise a family and have kids and it's not biological - it's seen as the natural transition from moving on from a sexualized maiden to a mother figure sacrificing herself for the good of others and they've learned this since childhood. Even this thread taking those accounts as just "old pathetic women being mentally ill and dragging young women down with them" should be actual living proof of my point.

No. 333870

I assume it's because the human brain stops developing at 25. Actual human puberty mentally and physically stops at 25 for women and 30 for men iirc. But I might be misinformed on this.

No. 333874

I think this is just a sad incel and/or blackpill troll that’s baiting across all threads these days. It’s exhausting but kinda easy to spot once you’ve encountered them.
>Goal is to make you feel bad and start an infight
>Lack of reading comprehension, nitpicks certain arguments or one specific post while ignoring everything else
>At the same time will use other anons arguments verbatim when it’s befitting
>Volunteers little information about themselves so they can make something up later to one-up you “ackshyually I’m in college”

No. 333879

It’s so funny that this thread upset a few nonas/possible scrotes enough to write unhinged rants about why this thread is sooo bad and it’s hardly even offensive. Calling the thread toxic while coming in here attacking women for simply having a discussion. You guys who are absolutely miserable and unlikeable btw. I appreciate this thread bc I always assume I’m older than everyone and it’s good to know there are actually other women my age on here. If the topic of looks comes up, so fucking what, don’t read or reply to that specific post. Use your brains and stop blaming women for existing in a world where we’re conditioned to care about that shit since birth. Reminder that nobody here is better than other women for being so unbothered by how you look because you’re just the perfect feminist. Literally shut the fuck up and maybe even kys

No. 333884


Yea like this failure redpilled scrote or redpilled woman who needs help >>332968 100% reads like a manosphere loser. Outdated narrow-minded thinking that women hit the wall at 30, no concept of female comradery of women helping or watching out for other women, and anything outside of the white picket housewife life is misery. Lolcow has a bunch of moids lurking but once it in a while they completely fail to hide it kek

There's plenty of examples of women here who posted about live fulfilling, happy, comfortable lives in their 30s and who are willing encourage or give advice.
20s is barely starting life, 30s is still young and when most people actually can or do start their life. For many, 20s is just studying, shit job, dating mistakes, and time to learn about yourself. So don't let some bitter nonnie or dateless wonder scrotes who hate happy women discourage you.

No. 333890

Hi I made this thread and wanted it to be a supportive place for late twenties and above women to be able to share their experiences and feelings/thoughts honestly without judgement and incel scrote rhetoric. Can we get back on track and make this an uplifting & positive conversation, please? It started off so well and degraded so quickly. Let’s all support each other and stop fighting. Additionally, if you’re under 25 and have nothing positive to say here, don’t say anything at all. Thank you!

No. 333892

I myself am 27 and really am just tired of the constant hate for 30+ women and wanted to hear from women around my age and who have passed the 30 mark, this was meant to be a positive thread and not infighting so please, can we all get back on track?

No. 333895

>anything outside of housewifing is misery
I literally only made fun of you losers because none of you have any good respectable jobs or any other life skills. Most admit youre mentally ill or stunted, can't make friends or any connections and probably don't like the currently position you're in yourselves either.
Also being a housewife is dangerous as you'd be dependent on a random man who could walk out any time he wished.
Youre pathetic because you've wasted your life away and only think about how "you've hit a wall" instead of realizing how many opportunities you've missed. If being less pretty is all you care about even though you have no friends, no life skills, no education, several unmedicated mental illnesses,
nothing to be proud of, then I don't even know what to tell you.

You're parroting incel mantra because hanging around in toxic incel spaces is what you spend your time doing. Seriously stop, you're too old to be wasting any more time like this. It's sad.

Only people who have nothing to offer care this much about looks. As I said, I interact with a lot of older women irl and I've never looked at them and thought they were worthless because they didn't look like airbrushed celebs. You're obsessed with looks because you spend your time online in echo chambers and know that you have nothing to offer so you blame all yout issues on your lack of beauty. Go outside, look at women my age. Are they all gorgeous? No. But they're not obsessing over their lack of beauty and letting that stop them from living their lifes.
Stop pretending that it's normal to care this much about looking "sexy" when you all have much bigger issues.(back to infight, again)

No. 333897

It's bait, don't reply just report and keep grooving

No. 333898

File: 1686147981620.gif (120.94 KB, 400x398, happybday.gif)

What do you think of the concept of "milestone birthdays"? Will you/did you do something special for your 30th/40th/etc? Would you appreciate if people made a bigger deal out of it than any other birthday? I feel like every birthday is kind of the same but I also think it can be fun to do something bigger if you have an excuse. I have not ever had a big bday bash but my best friend is turning 40 this year and I want to do something extra for her, I just don't know what.

No. 333903

Thats so nice of you to want to plan something for your friend. I have nothing to contribute really, I never really celebrate my bday with parties or anything more than buying something / taking a bit of time off. Dont like the attention. But whatever you decide to do for your friend I am sure she will appreciate. Maybe some kind of pun on 40, like 4D where theres those holographic oldschool posters everywhere and everyone gets those red and blue paper glasses? Lol.

No. 333906

I didn’t really do anything special for thirty, it really didn’t feel any different from my twenties and I don’t love big birthday stuff. I’ve kind of taken them slowly and quietly since then and just did hobbies I really like instead of any organized thing (apart from a nice dinner sometimes).

No. 333947

The frontal lobe fully develops at 25, which is pretty significant, but not everything. It doesn't mean any maturity or growth can't happen on a personal level. I was in a terrible place at age 21-29 with 25/26 as the worst due to circumstances, it was being more mentally developed that help me manage and get out of it.

No. 334081

I didn’t put a lot of effort into my career in my early 20s. I got hired by the company I wanted very quickly, and sort of stayed stagnant there for three years. Once I passed 26, it seemed like things clicked and my goals for myself evolved. Now instead of staying stagnant at my “dream job”, I’m moving up which has been nice. I supervise now, but I’m also studying again for a higher degree and more money. Now I’m much prouder of myself and my accomplishments, and glad I didn’t stick with the “dream job” of my early 20s. This year I’ll be working for a medical examiner’s office and within the next two years I’ll be a certified medicolegal death investigator. It feels so badass and I can honestly say I’m proud of how I’ve evolved career-wise. When I was in my early 20s I had it “all figured out” but as I enter my late 20s I have much bigger goals and higher standards for myself

No. 334129

not to derail but I'm just curious what field of study did you start with (like what associates or bachelor degree) before moving towards Death Investigator? I've never even heard of that job title it sounds really interesting, I thought there were just coroners and cops.

No. 334162

Congrats nonna, that’s awesome!

No. 334165

Which games do you like?

No. 334182

I turned 29 this week. I don't have any goal i particular right now, I'm single, I live with my parents because rent prices are outrageous and my salary isn't all that high. I'm just maintaining my routine of waking up, going to work, going on a stroll or shopping after work and going back home to eat dinner, shower and play video games or post here before going to bed. It's boring but comfy, and staying with my family means I can save a lot of money so the only things I'm truly planning right now are a few trips here and there abroad or in my own country. Honestly I could have went way further in life if it weren't for a shit ton of external circumstances ruining everything for me as soon as I was born so I have no ambition whatsoever, and that means no more stress.

No. 334183

I just turned 30. And after a life of misery, depression and failure I start to feel like my life is going somewhere. My apartment starts to be comfy and cute, a lot of my anxiety is gone, I’m able to do normal stuff like going to work which was impossible for me for a long time. I look forward to the future.

No. 334185

To be fair that's how many people I know from middle and high school are treating social media now. They all used facebook and twitter when it was the new hot thing a lot a little bit before 2010 and now almost all of them have deleted their posts or even their accounts, barely post anymore and just send private messages to their relatives or irl friends instead. I can see why some people would think that this would be the same thing for imageboards but they're too different from social media to be comparable in that regard.

No. 334220

I am 30 and I am happier than I ever was in my life. I spent my entire teenage years depressed and with severe eating disorder, spent my 20s trying to learn how to even be a functional human being, struggled hard to find people I could relate to and dated a bunch of losers until I met my now-husband at 26. I always desperately wanted to be a normie cause I was a NEET loser and I can now say I made it. I am married to my soulmate, have a beautiful babygirl, moved away from my shithole country and we are buying a house this year. I have everything I always wanted so I can deal with a couple of wrinkles and grey hairs. I still sometimes get insecure about my age and looks just because society really beats it into you as a woman, but I have great support and am very happy.

No. 334222

The wall is not just a metaphot…(scrote who can't spell)

No. 334256

A year from 30. Less actually. Feel fine. More accomplished, real career and relationships. Most people assume I'm 22-23 so that's cool but also it really is just genetics. I drink a lot but I did quit smoking 3 years ago.

My main thing about being closer to 30 is that people younger than 25, unless a family friend, relative, friends siblings, etc.. I can't stand. Yeah some people can be mature for their age. I was told that a lot in my teens (I was also living on my own at 17 so I had no choice.) I can't get on well with the younger crowd, there's such a big disconnect. Also they're so fucking overly opinionated like they know everything and everything is so stupid and woke as well. I worked with some younger kids at my last retail job 2 years ago and I remember mentioning as a joke "I feel like a dude" and all of them got so excited asking me if I was fucking trans. Can't say shit around them.

No. 334297

The early 20s of this generation are more immature and brainrotted than the early 20s of last generation. When I was a teenager, the people I knew in their 20s were so mature and cool to me, but zoomers act more like the peers I had when I was a teenager.

No. 334302

I'm turning 26 in a few months and I struggle most right now with a lack of ambition. I work full-time in unskilled work and live with my parents. I've settled into a routine and feel pretty stuck. I have a desire to do MORE with my life, I just don't know what, and it's hard to make any change when I have no true ambition. I also feel this annoying regret that I didn't become social until my mid 20s. I was sheltered and abused as a teen and developed a social phobia because of it. I'm finally overcoming that but I keep thinking about how much further I'd have gotten in life if I'd felt confident and driven by the time I graduated high school. That being said I've definitely noticed a growth in my mental stability and overall maturity in the past year or so and I'm not afraid to get older so much as I just compare my situation with other people too much. I'm not afraid to be 30+, I'm just afraid to be 30+ and still doing the exact same thing I'm doing now.

No. 334313

There are many jobs in the ME field surprisingly, I was going to aim for autopsy assistant until I looked into medicolegal death investigator and the listings in my area. I started off with funeral services and a funeral service education degree. After 5 years of working with the medical examiner on occasion, doing calls with them, and hands on experience with dead bodies through funeral services - I was able to be considered at the MEO in my area. In most cases they want you to have a bachelor’s in science, I believe, but having lots of relevant experience is also an option. They also want you to have some classes or experience with medical terminology and anatomy which I luckily have. Where I’m working they require you to be certified after 1.5-2 years from hire date, and once you’re hired on at the MEO those doors start to open and the progress is fast.

If you’re interested in working in the field, I’d recommend starting off with a bachelor’s in science or the two year funeral service education degree, and maybe do some removals for a while (just removing and transporting the decedents to various locations), imo hands on experience with dead bodies of all types (decomps, suicides, crime scenes, normal deaths at home/nursing homes/hospitals) is the way to go for gaining the experience they look for. I wish I had applied sooner tbh I wouldn’t have been stuck running in circles at a funeral home for minimal pay lol. Funeral services does not pay well so my early 20s dream job didn’t really get me far

No. 334597

Asking this makes me feel very stupid, but how do you find friends in your 30s? I've moved some times and so everyone I know is far away and the contact is mostly not there anymore because of that. So, if you move to a new city in your 30s, how can you find friends and please don't tell me work, as the people there are mostly not what I would like to have as a friend.

No. 334629

I will be monitoring replies to this lol
I lived in five different cities in the last ten years. I have friends from the second city and somehow no friends from any other cities (one “toxic” ex friend I honestly shouldn’t have been friends with but that doesn’t count, we basically bonded over being workaholics at the same job) other than that just some work acquaintances I don’t keep up with. I don’t know how some people do it… feels like I should actually have a large social circle from living so many places but the reality is the opposite. I’m not even socially anxious. Kinda wish I hadn’t moved so much in my 20s

No. 334634

Making friends in your 30s is difficult ngl. I've mainly made friends through volunteering. Try to find different volunteer opportunities and you'll come across some people with similar interests and values.

You can also try different groups like book clubs and activity groups (e.g. running club etc).

No. 334649

Join clubs and classes of things you are interested in (art, books, dance, rock climbing etc) keep an eye open for any events around your city that you may be into and you think people you may vibe with will go to (concerts, expositions, farmers markets, film showings, etc)

Always be willing to approach first, there is nothing embarrassing about wanting to make friends, people love friendly people who make things feel less lonely and so they will likely be open to you unless you are terribly socially inept. If so, being the person who approaches first may seen scary, but the trick is just throwing a comment someone's way and wait if they reply in kind, don't force it or act too eager. The more you do it, the easier it gets.

No. 334738

Work. I’ve met most of my friends through work.

No. 334743

She said work wouldn’t work for her due to the type of people she works with. I’m curious what that means exactly though. Maybe she will tell us. Work is where I got all my friends but that’s also partially why I keep losing them when I move so it’s not the perfect environment

No. 334745

My guess is marketing people

No. 334762

I hear so often that I look 20-25, I think it’s when you don’t dress like a granny and don’t have super deep wrinkles from a overly expressive face that people assume you cannot be 30. Because 30 is old and ugly? Not assuming what you look like btw I’m sure you look great

No. 334788

Thank you both, I will give those things a try.

I'm working in the fashion industry and I had to work with troons, gender special women, annoyingly woke women, extremely gay men and overall people you wouldn't want in your life. In the end, I would be open to befriend someone at work but never met someone I would say that he/she is worth it.

No. 334864

Eh this happens to me as well, and you’re right. My little brother has deep lines, and a different bio dad so aged much differently. People assume I’m his little sister and starting college soon for gods sake. He never gets carded. Nobody I meet assumes my true age - I’m 27 and have yet to not be carded, teens assume I’m their age and try to converse with me, I recently tried to enter an 18+ lounge and was asked if I’m 18 and to show ID. It’s annoying at work because my partner is an older man, and it’s a family owned business so clients ask if I’m his daughter and along for the ride to learn… nobody takes me seriously, scrotes still approach me and catcall like I’m still 20. It’s almost a curse if you really look at it from my adult perspective. I’ve been waiting for age to hit me in some way, but I’ve consistently looked 20 since well, age 20 lol. Haven’t even put on extra weight since 20 or grown tits. Starting to think I never will. The worst part is the surprised looks and confusion when I present my ID when asked. At one bar, they assumed it was a fake and my friend who was with me had to stand up for me. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be. I can’t wait to get a few fine lines, maybe gain five pounds and be taken seriously by adults and people around my age.

On the plus side, the physical aspect of aging doesn’t scare me much at all. Just the implications that come with being older, the expectations, and the looming reality of my older family members getting sick or dying

No. 335235

I used to have friends through my old job but at the same time I felt like I couldn’t/shouldn’t actually get too close to them or like if we met outside of work I wouldn’t have been drawn to them. Idk, is it bad to be cautious with coworkers and friendships? I’m always afraid something will happen so I’d mainly just go out to eat with them and keep conversations relatively shallow.

No. 335244

Not that anon but I'm a network engineer and refuse to move past shallow conversations with my (mostly male) coworkers. Work isn't an option for actual friendship lol

No. 335252

It's nice to see other nonas talking about this. I'm in the same boat and I find it hard to talk about because it comes off as bragging. I'm 31 and I still look very young and people assume I'm young. I kinda dread the moment when my age comes up because people act so weird when they find out about it. I feel like I'm not a serious person and like no one views me as a serious adult. I already feel behind in life in many ways and it makes me feel like even more of an outsider.

No. 335253

Sage because I just want to half blog/comment. I am nearing 30, and I think that I am noticing the 'younger' gen grow up some. It is so neat. I like video essays and random philosophical things on youtube. I dont always agree but I enjoy hearing someone really pick apart an idea about society and culture. I am seeing more and more 'young' creators on youtube pick apart their own experiences in the zoomer culture- like fresh outta highschool or 1 to 2 years into college. Picking apart 'aethetic' or 'doomerism' or what have you in a longform and intelligent way. Its so so cool to see critical thinking about the shit they got handed, so many people shit on zoomers due to needing that dopamine hit constantly and being lazy in their work. Imo they are going to have a harder time building a satisfying existance than my generation, and my generation is fucked. Stuff like that makes me realize I am 'older' (not Old though). Something that happened at a job I did once- kid maybe 20 or so working on a retail rebuild thing and he straight up had no idea how to read a tape measure. Blew my mind. Not even the ability to deduce it from context of lil consistent numbers. So I showed him… and he used it flawlessly kek. He was just trying to match distances from a different object basically. At first I felt he was stupid. Then I realized there had be zero context in his whole life and education…where he needed to use one, more likely. He wasnt stupid. Idk I guess I feel almost motherly now when I hear late teens and early 20s doing their thing. And I see such lack of organic opportunity for real character and critical thinking development for the zoomers it makes me sad. Even discovering oneself via coming of age etc and 'rebelling against the status quo' has been turned into a product to sell and capitalize on. A lot of them know it, too. I cant believe how young I am to feel like I have seen a lifetime shift in the world, I guess. Its a bit overwhelming to imagine what the next decade will look like.

No. 335260

I'm 37 and had to show my ID twice to buy alcohol this month and we are allowed to drink reaching 18, kek. Most people assume my age between 25 and 30. Sometimes I think about lying about me real age in my CV, because somehow people just can't tell that I'm old enough to have adult children, kek.

Getting told that you are mature for your age if you are young is somehow damaging, I feel. I got told that a lot when I was around 15 to 18. Real reason was, I was depressed, not mature, just done with everything and because I was quiet, didn't get into trouble and read depressing stuff, people assumed I'm mature and there might not be the chance that I would need help. I also never heard someone say to a boy that he is mature for his age, it's just expected of girls to be all grown up.

No. 335264

I used to think this was a compliment and meant I look young too but I recently learned that most stores have rules that they have to ask every customer who appears to be under the age of 40 for ID. Some places even have a sign next to the check-out that says this.

No. 335285

Might be a thing here, too, even thought most places won't even check the IDs from minors buying alcohol.

No. 337201

This, exactly. It’s really awkward when someone asks what year I was born or how old I am. People perceive me as being early 20s and treat me as such. My coworker in his 30s was talking about cartoons his younger sister would watch growing up. I talked about some of the cartoons I watched as a kid, he then asked what year I was born and I told him. It was awkward after that, he just kinda said “oh… so you’re, wow. Ok.” And then it turned into horrible silence. Like, he was that taken aback that I’m almost 30? I get he was thinking I’m early 20s, but is it really that shocking to men when they find out you can look very young but still be a mature, literal adult? It seemed to bother him. Fucking awkward and almost makes me want to lie about my age so shit like that doesn’t happen anymore

No. 337204

Do you not go out a lot or do you wear sunscreen when outside?

No. 337208

Both, I don't like the feeling of sun on my skin, so I wear sunscreen and long clothes when outside. If I can avoid it, I won't be outside in the summer except from the early morning or late evening hours. I also don't smoke what helps your skin very much and I have pale skin with a rather large round face, so if I lose fat in my face it's not that visible.

No. 337226

I know that's the rule but it's so funny to me because the age I look apparently changes depending on what else I am buying. Beer, chips, and salsa means I'm under 40 but beer, milk, and eggs means I'm over 40.

No. 337255

the so called wall is a lie, stay fit and childfree and it won't come for you

I'm 34 and my bf is 22. Together almost a year. This makes old scrotes seethe and I love it so much.

No. 337265

I unironically think being volcel and not having to deal woth moid bullshit saved me from so much stress and premature aging.

No. 337309

This is unironically why I gatekeep being friends with people below 28. I'm 32 myself and this same ish happened to me around that age. I don't buy the rhetoric that we're fully mature by 24 or whatever. People in their 20s are massive insecure losers with no swag and no taste.

No. 337362

Wasn't sure whether to post in the fashion thread but how are other 30+ nonas dressing these days? And where do you like to shop? Some good online stores?
I am a firm believer that you can still dress how you like, and I like some of the "elder emo" fashion that I see sometimes. Corporate goth is nice, stuff like that. I am just feeling like I want to be less showy at this age if that makes sense but at the same time I still want to wear something nice but probably comfortable? I used to wear short skirts and shorts, busty tops etc but don't feel like it anymore. I still have some for occasions but yeah. Hope that makes sense.
Also the fact that everything is made as cheaply as possible nowadays and I want things that last.

No. 337368

>it won't come for you
>implying that the wall is real if you do certain things
Lame. "The wall" isn't real either way.

No. 337374

i'm starting feel like the wall is losing its meaning kek and today more than ever scrotes are throwing it around to insult women or basically very young women now.
The manosphere uses it for women at 25 now because they believe 25 is when women "peak" in appearance and fertility, but others will say its women are no longer attractive which doesn't make sense since many women in their 30s still look young in their 20s now because of better life choices…. and scrotes can't tell the difference.
A few weeks ago, some cryptorich redpiller made a post about how he'd never date women past 30 with a photo of girls around him as if he pulled them. But then one of the girls came out said she's a sex worker hired by him, and she and the other girls in the photo are 30+ kek. Even scrotes can't tell the age of most women kek

No. 337417

Nta but I’m a very young looking near 30, like mistaken for 19-22. I’ve spent the last 7 years working nights only and see the sun rarely, and if I do have to go out in the sun I’m wearing tons of sunscreen. My family seethes about how I haven’t aged yet and claim this is the reason. But I also maintain a low weight (120, 5’6) do strength training, eat healthy, intermittent fast, don’t drink alcohol and had an insane amount of extra fat on my face when I was younger so fat loss in the face was beneficial for me.

No. 337435

the general amount of skin I show got less, like skirts are longer or no hot pants, but in the end I dress very similar to the past 20 years. Mostly all black, basic stuff and band shirts, kek. I want to change it a little bit to a more elegant goth look on some days and a "goth ninja" (hate that term) look on other days. Stuff being comfortable is also very important, I changed my complete underwear to basic looking comfortable stuff, kek. Like you I can't find shops that have the right price for the right quality so haven't been shopping for a long time now. I know I could buy designer clothes that fit my aesthetic, but I don't have the money and don't think that the quality justifies the price, so I will have to sew everything myself in the near future, at least that way it will fit 100% and I know that no child labour was involved. Hope some other nonnas have some online stores or brands for us.

No. 339789

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Hate to bump but has anyone here used the “aged” filter that’s trending on tiktok? I’m 27, have been in this thread a bit and panicked about aging (have always felt afraid to get old)

So is this actually an accurate filter?! It feels so unfair if so. I see a lot of girls looking mostly like themselves, just older, which good for them but… when I do it on myself, I look NOTHING like myself. I literally look like Pearl in X. It’s insane and it’s actually causing me fucking mental harm. I don’t want to humblebrag but I look young at 27, I’m pretty, no wrinkles, etc. And always thought I’d age gracefully until this filter came out. Someone please give me input on this filter, because I look like a plumper picrel when I use it, it’s embarrassing and terrifying

No. 339791

Don't use filters. Problem solved. I'm serious.

No. 339792

>a data collection app is trending on a chinese brain rot simulator
I'm shocked.

No. 339793

So women who look old aren't graceful? "Aging gracefully" is just a (misogynistic) dogwhistle for looking younger with the help of surgery. You may relax by knowing that people won't find you hot anymore after a certain point, and it's okay. You shouldn't base your worth and mental health on how hot you are.

No. 339795

> I don’t want to humblebrag but I look young at 27, I’m pretty, no wrinkles,
You shouldn't look old or have wrinkles at 27 smartass, time to limit your social media usage.

No. 339797

touch grass

No. 339798

Do you never leave the house? Most normies are haggard and starting to wrinkle and bald by 27. I even see 17 year olds with crows feet.

No. 339800

I have a perfectly fine social life and see people of all ages daily, do you? Late 20s moids often look like dogshit but late 20s women? Or even early 30s women? Not whatsoever. The only late 20s woman I know who looks genuinely old has been going to the tanning salon on a weekly basis ever since she was legally allowed to do so on top of abusing alcohol every weekend. Women don't look old or have wrinkles at 27 if they have an average healthy lifestyle. Maybe you just live in a trash area where people don't know how to take reasonable care of themselves.

No. 339801

Sounds like there's something in the water or air or food where you live that's making people sick.

No. 339802

Do you live in a place with tons of sun and methheads maybe?

No. 339803

I posted this - I’m not saying women in their 20s-30s look old. What I’m saying is this dumbass filter keeps being backed by surgeons and doctors as being “accurate”, allegedly it ages you 30 years. And mine is so terrifying that it doesn’t even look like myself in any way shape or form. I look like a hag that would poison children when I do the filter on myself - which is why I’m asking if anyone has done it themselves, and if it’s actually accurate. No hate for older women, I wouldn’t mind being old as it’s a gift even if it feels scary, but my point is this filter implies I’ll look like an evil 90 year old hag in just 30 years, which is messing with my head. I’d like to be the sweet older lady that would bake cookies for kids and give them wise advice. It’s not about being fuckable or hot. I’d just like to look like myself in some way and according to this thing I’m going age like milk in the most horrific way possible. That’s what bothers me about the damn thing. It can’t possibly accurately predict how people will look in 30 years, right?

No. 339805

I go outside plenty and I’m not seeing this at all. I see beautiful people from teens-50 year old women looking great. I’m with the other anons - are you surrounded by crackheads or something?

No. 339809

I see this in more sunny places and places where wearing a lot of makeup is the norm. Most women look younger than they are, especially in their 30's. Men look the same everywhere, they hit the wall like a motherfucker because they just don't care about themselves.

No. 339810

Babies have crows feet. I’ve never understood that one, it seems like a bad marker of age. Same with other smile lines.

No. 339822

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Lots of literal children where I live have smile lines, crows feet, and even "marionette lines" (not really but lines going down to your chin). It's just our facial fat distribution. We don't age badly either. There is no concept of 'the wall' here. Men will just fuck anybody.
Is this a Western/Northern Europe thing? North America thing? Internet thing?
I'm Greek, we certainly don't look haggard by 27 even though it's sunny. Some people never wear sunscreen either, and lots of us chain smoke. Some men will start balding and look like the Penguin after 25 but most people lead decently healthy lives and move a lot. You have to try really hard to look old in your late 20s and early 30s. The internet has scared a lot of women into buying products by telling them they will be unlovable and ugly.

No. 339823

I'll be 32 next month and I feel like I'm actually happier. My life isn't perfect, but things are going a lot more smoothly than my teen years or all of my 20s. Linking vid because she's someone I watch and she recently did a video about turning 30 and I can relate to a lot of what she says, but especially the part about not caring about certain things anymore. There are things I would've really been bothered by during my 20s that don't seem to faze me now and I'm not entirely sure why, but all I can attribute it to is age. I had a hair appointment last week and my stylist, who is 27, didn't believe that I'm about to be 32. I even saw the stylist and client in the chair beside us quickly glance over out of my periphery when I said my age and people in my classes (a mixed bag of some older than me, but mostly zoomers) also didn't believe that I was 30 a few semesters back.

I will say that the only difficulty has been finding women around my age to be friends with, because it seems like they've either settled down to have kids already and are always busy or they're handmaidens to the gender retards. I don't harbor any hatred towards women with kids and I'm still on the fence about whether I want them someday, but it would feel awkward trying to hang out with someone who is clearly on a different path than me. I'm sure that if I decide to start a family, I'll be able to befriend other mothers because it seems like there's so much more readily available for families than the childless. For now, my boyfriend and I are focused on being fiscally responsible and plan to eventually look for a house.

No. 340435

When I hit about 33 (35 now) I started having some strange experiences and thoughts about life. It might sound retarded, or just like mental illness lol but I started questioning the purpose of life in general, my own life, worthlessness of life, what I'm doing, what I haven't done, how I'd lived in my 20's, felt weird about my hobbies being only for the teen-mid 20's age range, compared what I considered important then to now, felt strangely empty, like things were not real, had a ton of anxiety, struggled with my body changing (period changes, skin changes, first gray hair at 28, fine lines/wrinkles, and even my fingerprints starting to just fucking disappear), a sudden awareness that I have detached completely from the younger generation or rather stopped keeping up with music and media so I really exude that "How do you do fellow kids?" energy if I have to socialize with them at work for instance but also feel totally unwelcome by the older crowd, also been pondering the fact that I don't have a partner and never explored my sexuality. My upbringing was a little fucked up so I don't form relationships normally and certainly can't maintain them, and that's any relationship. I'm terrified of men and will go to great lengths to avoid them even though I'm straight and want to just TOUCH and cuddle with someone and that biological clock is REAL and ticking for me. But, I feel like at 35.5 I'm far too old to have a child. I have a steady and decent paying job, own two vehicles, have a therapist that helps some, but my living situation is not good. I live with my aging parents and am seeing them decline slowly so I wonder if it's fair to leave them and yet, they infantilized me my entire life and still control me. As of now, I kind of just get through each day and try not to cry. Some days are a little better than others but I know I'm only going one way, and that's downhill. Can't discuss any of this with my mother, she's an old hippy stoner and super paranoid and hysterical about everything.

No. 341083

32 now. Turning 30 completely nuked my sex drive. I used to have a fairy high libido and would masturbate 3-4x a week on top of almost daily sex, sometimes long sessions with multiple Os. Now I never feel like doing it and masturbate maybe once every two months. I also noticed I had lost nearly all attraction to my longtime boyfriend after I turned 30. I started avoiding sex and even dreaded kissing him, he was upset and not understanding of it at all, eventually we broke up because of it. I have not felt attracted to one single man I’ve met irl or even online. I don’t know what happened but it’s like my clit dried up and now I can’t get horny for anyone. No idea if this is normal or not but I know it wasn’t anything to do with birth control because my bf had a vasectomy and I didn’t use it. In a way it’s liberating because I don’t think about sex anymore but it does feel strange losing almost all arousal. Anyway yeah don’t mean to scare anyone but that’s my experience.

No. 341100

I guess it depends on the person. I just get hornier with age, although you do lose the ability to get dripping wet.

No. 341160

I'm 30 and most of the people I know today think I'm younger because I was so behind my peers in life achievement stuff and probably just generally give off an immature vibe. Around 29 I did start to shift a bit, although I'm not really afraid of aging appearancewise, but instead dread the thought I have to somehow still spend 40-50(-60) years alive and should stay in generally good health. I feel like my mental abilities are lower than they were but that's mostly due to years of neetdom and depression, possibly untreated other mental stuff. I'm pretty annoyed that I do not have almost any plans for life still, I can't figure things out.

No. 341180

Any anons switched up their careers entirely at 30? I've been working in big corporate tech for my entire 20s and I loathe it. I've been fantasising about changing paths but 1) I'm nervous to actually enact change and 2) I've become accustomed to the level of wealth I have now (which isn't a lot actually, but slashing that sounds terrifying especially with the cost of living on the rise). I feel so trapped and I really want to do SOMETHING else for a living for the next decade…

No. 341202

It's been the other way around for me. I thought I was asexual in my teens and 20s but at 30+ I feel like I finally developed a libido and feel and interest in those things with others. It's a relief because I went through something traumatic as a teenager that basically "turned" me asexual for over a decade, and it doesn't have a hold on me anymore. The draw is now I want to date and explore my sexuality, but no one my age likes anything casual, they've already been around that block just want to settle down, and I'm not into age gaps.

No. 341213

This thread makes me want to kill myself. With your insecurity you are just validating moids.
Based on this thread most of you genuinely believe you you loose value the moment you turn 30.

No. 341215

Most of the posts in this thread are positive and about how our lives turned around after 25, learn to fucking read instead of skimming a few whiny posts.

No. 341218

Just have sex with younger men?

No. 341227

I didn't have a career to begin with, dropped out of university without a degree and let my 20s be ruined by alcohol and depression. In my early 30s I finally got a degree, got another degree based on it and right now I'm looking into getting further education in my field. Honestly, if I had the money, I would go back to university, study biology and not care about a plan or career, but I don't have the money, so that might be a dream forever. If you feel trapped, that might be a good sign that you should change your path and start something new, maybe work till the end of the year, put some money aside for emergencies and think about what would make you happy. In my opinion it's never too late to change and you have enough years of work ahead of you, so why hate what you do when you could change it?

No. 341231

The post just said:
>I'm not into age gaps.

No. 341331

I’m closing in on 30 soon and this thread was really helping me before. Can we bring this back, and can any over 30 nonnies provide me with any sources of comfort? I was on 4chan yesterday and it made the situation worse. So many men there saying women only have value before hitting 25. I know I shouldn’t listen to incels but it really hurt. I’ll never know what people in my day to day life are thinking I’m beyond hope, useless eggs, “hitting the wall” etc. I’m having a bit of an existential crisis, feeling like my life is over and essentially my existence is going to be minimized and my age will be all society cares about. I feel that if my current relationship doesn’t work, once I hit 30 I won’t have any options. I’m feeling self critical because I’m not where I thought I would be in life at this point in time. And I’m scared because it felt like my 20s just flew by, and I missed out on so many things I wanted to do/become. I know this is negative thinking - can any wiser nonnies give me some guidance? When I was in my early 20s I told myself that if I was still feeling like an ugly failure around 30 I’d just give up on life. I’m so anxious when I think about time and I’m not ready to be 30+. I don’t want to wear conservative clothes, give up on myself, change my goals to be more “mature”, I just want another chance at my 20s and I can’t have those years back. I do not have any girl friends in my age range and I just have no support for this transition as my mental health decimated my 20s and made it hard to find friends. Someone, please give me words of guidance. I’m lost here.

No. 341336

semi unrelated chiming in to say taylor is so fucking hot and truly iconic regardless of whatever faults she does have. i'm so glad she's becoming even more insanely popular and honestly she has never looked hotter

No. 341340

> I’m not ready to be 30+. I don’t want to wear conservative clothes, give up on myself, change my goals to be more “mature”, I just want another chance at my 20s and I can’t have those years back.
I'm not really sure what it is you want to do that is only possible in your 20's. Your 30's aren't years where you start to dress like a an old librarian lady then lie down and rot while the world moves past you. Some things like children do have biological end dates and need to be taken into consideration when making plans for your 30s, and you're out of the run to become like a female athletics champion now, but other than that, I really don't know what's so limiting.
It might not be the most positive or upbeat thinking, but also - you won't be getting younger. If you didn't start some habit or project you wanted years ago, now's the earliest time you can mend that. Even if you don't change your work, start a degree, start socializing now (I have no idea what your goals are), time will still move forward and you'll just be a 35 year old with a shitty job, no degree and no friends.

No. 341349

why do you have to change magically over night because you turned 30? Nonna, you can still be immature, you can still wear whatever you want, you can still have the same goals or none at all, you could find a new partner, you can have children at the end of your 30s, you can marry in your 50s, there is no wall and men telling you there is one already hit that wall in their teens. I missed out on many things in my 20s, too, mental health issues are shit and ruin much, but I won't let my 30s and however much I have left be ruined by stupid social norms that aren't true or real. Just sit down, think what you imagine your life should be at the end of your 30s and then work towards that. If you want children, see if your partner fits and if you both are ready in the next years. You want to change your job or your appearance, do it. You want to make new friends or travel the world, well, you can still walk, so go for it. There is nothing holding you back except for maybe money and your own mind.
I've met many women in their 30s to 60s and all of them were strong, independent women, with goals, hobbies, love and they dressed like they wanted. Sure, there are women out there that are miserable, but some are miserable because of their own making and you don't have to take them as an example how growing old will be.

No. 341350

in the same boat, but at least you're in a relationship. people will want to befriend you because of this social status. you still have opportunities and support to pursue a career or marry and have children. you still have hope nona.

No. 341352

This is inspirational, I'm in a similar boat. Flunked out of college the first time I tried and then destroyed my 20s. But I'm currently doing some quick/cheap upgrading so that I can at least get out of retail. Maybe save some money so I can upgrade again in a few years to a real adult career. Thank you for giving me a little hope for the future kek.

No. 341356

File: 1690048323895.png (371.62 KB, 546x348, 2.png)

I'm 37, I have a mostly useless college/university degree but a useful high school diploma, I worked in IT for a while and now I've had this job for more than a year which involves cleaning floors and bathrooms in supermarkets and offices
Pretty good though

No. 341361

how do you go from IT to cleaning floors?

No. 341367

it's based if you think about it, especially if you can listen to music on the job. no people around, no mouthbreathing men who assume you're incapable of doing work because your labia are flapping away doing the job or some stupid anatomically retarded shit, unlike IT. reminds me of the janitor that was a multi millionaire and donated his wealth when he died to charity and absolutely everyone thought he was poor

No. 341368

Weird, where I live floor cleaning seems like a miserable job. The cleaners drive around at nighttime and some of their stops are hours away, with shitty managers that argue, and some of them bring their kids along because they can’t afford overnight sitters or whatever

No. 341369

nice b8

No. 341370

Doesn't it earn pennies though? Idk I
ve only ever seen obvious migrant women have cleaning jobs.

No. 341372

I've only done housekeeping at a hotel but in some ways it was great. the hours of working alone on something with a set beginning and end time and a visible final product… weirdly rewarding. wish it payed more, a bad boss or guest could really ruin your day too but for the most part it was very chill.

No. 341379

>but no one my age likes anything casual, they've already been around that block just want to settle down
This is just blatantly not true. People like casual sex at any age. Yes more people this age are looking for something more serious but they're not going to turn down casual sex in the meantime kek.

No. 341450

>So many men there saying women only have value before hitting 25.
Same men are complaining that women are incapable of being mothers, that they are wasting their eggs, that they are poor losers. They can't make up their damned mind, either they want a young carefree woman to have sex with or a mature woman who is financially stable and ready to be a wife and mom. Same men are wasting their youths and rant on 4chan instead of having a meaningful relationship and children.
>And I’m scared because it felt like my 20s just flew by, and I missed out on so many things I wanted to do/become
I feel the same, but ask yourself if the things you wanted to do are actually impossible now. Don't focus on what you missed out on - you weren't well enough to pursue them, don't blame yourself for it, focus on improving your life and yourself so that you can pursue those things now. Don't torment yourself for not achieving milestones.

No. 341457

This stress comes from being far behind others. If you haven't changed much in your 20s through studying, working, dating, friends then you feel extremely lost because you can't relate to anyone, you feel stunted and this leads to loneliness. In reality, life is very chaotic, a lot of people don't have a perfect life at 30 - people change careers, break-up serious relationships, are lonely because they haven't met anyone/gave up on relationships, return to school, develop crippling mental and health issues, they regret what they did in their 20s, have a broken heart, debts, feel like life if pointless and boring etc. Lack of experience can be good.

No. 341475

>a lot of people don't have a perfect life at 30 - people change careers, break-up serious relationships, are lonely because they haven't met anyone/gave up on relationships, return to school, develop crippling mental and health issues, they regret what they did in their 20s, have a broken heart, debts, feel like life if pointless and boring etc. Lack of experience can be good.
Nta. I know no one's life is perfect but I just don't see the "plenty of people deal with serious shit at 30" irl, at least not with friends and family that I'm close enough with to know for fairly certain they're probably not dealing with shit behind closed doors. Like I'm the only one in my social circle who was in and out of the education system throughout her 20s and didn't start a real adult career until her late 20s, I went back to uni at 25 and I was definitely the only one in that age range, everyone else was 21 tops, I'm the only one who isn't in a long-term relationship (not that I particularly care about this one but still), I'm the only one who's still renting without real perspective on buying property because everyone else had a "real" adult job and a partner to fund a house with just before the housing market skyrocketed, I'm the only one "floating" who hasn't settled.

Not trying to throw a pity party for myself here btw, I'm honestly not unhappy and I'm working hard on meeting my personal goals so it's fine but I'm definitely the only one in my immediate social circles who has clearly failed to meet default expectations/milestones at (nearly) 30 and it's a bit alienating seeing everything go so smoothly and down the expected road for everyone else my age who I associate with. I love my friends and family and I wish the best for them but sometimes I wish I could join a "I fucked my teens and 20s up and I'm still dealing with the consequences, let's be friends"-club lmao.

No. 341476

I only started wearing clothes like crop tops and shorts/skirts above the knee after age 30. Nothing really changed, it just took me that long to mentally grow into my adult body. There's no law about having to wear conservative clothes just because terminally online virgins think you're too old to fuck.

No. 341539

>at least not with friends and family that I'm close enough with to know for fairly certain they're probably not dealing with shit behind closed door
It's just the people you are surrounded with, I meant that it in general, like if you approach a random person at that age they might not have everything, they aren't fully satisfied. I am in a similar situation as you so I wish you the best nonna, we can do it

No. 346914

How's everyone's financial health these days? Late 20s and onward nonnies.

No. 347040

My financial health is significantly better than when I was 20, but poor at the same time

I’m panicking because I’m another year closer to 30 this month. I feel like for my 30th I want to throw myself off a cliff, I’m so nervous. I didn’t enjoy my 20s the way most people do. Any nice nonnies that can talk me down/pass on words of wisdom?

No. 347041

No debt or crazy bills, more savings than my 20s but that’s just because I’ve been putting about the same amount away for over a decade, a tiny IRA/401k type thing I can’t touch for decades, no significant assets. Still have my health. I don’t know what you’d call my situation, fortunate but still poor? I have low ambitions and don’t desire a lot so I feel pretty free to do anything except buy a house in the places I think are nice (the cities I like are overpriced and I haven’t found a more remote area where things might be affordable)

No. 347050

My 30's has been some of the best times of my life so far. I'm so much more confident and I've been able to deal with my social anxiety better because I know it's just an anxiety and not reality.
You have to do what you want to do and own it. It's depressing but I like to think that we're all going to die some day and when we're dead literally none of this matters so why not do it?
Yes I love wearing crop tops and trying to look cute and I want to dress this way as long as I continue to like how I look in it. Being healthy pretty much automatically results in having a good body so that's extra incentive to take care of yourself and start eating healthy and exercising no matter what age you are.

No. 347059

Is it really depressing?

No. 347066

Turned 30 a few months ago and I'm starting all over again, so to speak. I hated my 20s. Can't even remember most of it due to severe depression. College was the worst time of my life. It was one of those things where I got a degree for the sake of getting one and once I got it, didn't apply it well enough and ended up in a dead end career for six years only for them to lay me off during the Spring of this year. By then I sabotaged myself job wise. Nothing left for me but low paying, demeaning, and abusive work. I had to reevaluate myself. Either I spend the rest of my 30s being constantly unemployed and underpaid or reinvent myself. So…I decided to go back to college lol. Considering past experience, it seems pointless, yet I'm not joking when I say I've dug myself into a hole, but this time I'm on scholarship and doing something I actually want and will land me with a job once I graduate. I will say I feel wiser, focused and more in control of my future than before. Though being the oldest in most of my courses makes me feel strange, even worse when the professor asked everyone their age and the whole room just kind of…stared lol. The dramatic "omg you don't even look its" was a lot for me. I've learned to keep my age to myself since then lol.

No. 347098

One of my worries about entering my 30s soon is that common belief that women not in their 20s start having sagging breasts… personal but has this been the case for anyone here? I don’t want to deal with that, it’s just hard for me to stomach

No. 347101

When you start to sag is based heavily on genetics and lifestyle choices. A smoker who kept putting on and off the same 10-15 kilos over the years probably will have sagginess even if they're weren't predisposed to it genetically, but then you also have people who've had saggy breasts since they were 19 just because that's what their body is like. Whatever you do, if you stay all natural your breasts will start sagging as you approach your 40-50s at the latest anyway, so you might as well just come to peace with aging.

No. 347103

Also forgot to add: one of the biggest causes besides weight gain/loss for sagginess is pregnancy and lactating, since the breasts also go through pretty significant and "quick" size-changes, and a lot of women go through pregnancy in their life. So focusing on age as a factor alone would be pretty pointless, because comparing a woman's snapshot from 22 to 32 would probably always be less stark of a difference than comparing another one from 22 to 28 if she had a child between those ages.

No. 347171

I hear you and we have very similar situations. Uncontrollable abuse from other people will fuck up your life and it's not your fault. Unfortunately I'm still living with my parent and abuser who loves the control so he won't leave us alone and I cannot start my life due to this. I'm also afraid I'll still be trapped by him living like I have since I was a kid.

No. 347186

I’m 29, I’ve always been considered pretty by others (not a humble brag, I think I’m ugly). I look younger than my age, I’ve got a brother 4 years younger than me and people assume I’m his little sister, etc. And my family rags on me for “not aging”. However I’m afraid of hitting 30 and hitting that fake “wall” incels talk about.

Is there anything nonnies recommend I can do this year to maintain my looks/body and essentially gave a late glow up before reaching 30? It’s shallow, but I’m dedicating this year to improving my looks so that I feel confident and empowered when I see myself in the mirror at 30+. What are the best things I can do for myself? Exercise is an obvious, healthy eating, but beyond that?

No. 347191

If you're genetically predisposed to have sagging breasts you'll literally see it as soon as you develop breasts. Age related sagging won't even happen until you're a literal grandma
not to get TMI but I use to work at a nursing home and have seen a fair share of grandmas that put me to shame

No. 347200

Good sleep and minimizing stress are a panacea. If you can nail the big 4 (other two being diet and exercise) then you are doing better than at least 95% of people. Combine that with the fact that most people only really hit their stride with career, life goals, and just general effectiveness in their pursuits once they are in their thirties and you are basically looking at having one of the best decades of your life.

I won't shill any particular books, but good advice tends to crop up again and again from multiple different sources. Basically just making sure than you give your work time and relaxation time hard edges that don't bleed into each other, and not confusing algorithmically-honed, dopamine-spiking distractions for relaxation will do a ton for reducing stress. Sleep stuff is again pretty basic and there's tons of info freely available.

No. 347209

>ITT: your 30's as a woman are awful if you are a moid, or in your 20's. For anybody actually in their 30's it's pretty great.

No. 347227

Why would you want to throw yourself off a cliff? My words of wisdom are maybe don't throw yourself off a cliff.

No. 347267

It’s just an expression. When I was 20/21 I was actually pretty serious about killing myself before hitting 30 (I was one of those “30 is old person age” 20 year olds). Really though, that energy is still inside me somewhere, I’m approaching a date I’ve been dreading since 20 and I don’t know how to cope beyond denial, self deprecation and an unhealthy obsession with anti-aging/appearances. It hits me pretty hard knowing some men view 30+ as used up and worthless, despite being engaged, I just never wanted to deal with being viewed as less than I am due to a silly number

No. 347285

I was similar about feeling like life was coming to an end when I was younger, though being serious about it sounds pretty extreme!

When it comes to growing out of that feeling, it probably helped that I had tried dating some of the men that care about age (stupid I know) in my 20s in an effort to lock down a man before I expire, learned that they all make for very bad partners and they were banking on me being too young to know better, and woke up to the fact that all along it was nothing more than a high pressure sales tactic. It turns out the "used up" talking point literally just means "she knows better than to date me now so I'm going to reject her first before she can reject me." It's all in bad faith and these men are chronic liars who want to cope with their loneliness by trying to make women feel bad about themselves. Anyway I replaced my fear with contempt. I don't care if I'm viewed as lesser than by shitty scrotes. Hopefully you can take something valuable from that.

No. 347291

Some men view women over 25 as used up and worthless too. Some men want to fuck kids. Why care about what they think? Men are retarded and most can't even tell how old someone is, how would they know who's "used up"? People who love you know you for who you are and numbers don't matter to them.

I had a bit of anxiety over turning 30 too (though not nearly to the extent of wanting to kms over it, that's worrying) but once you turn 30 you're just 30. Nobody shoots you like a lame horse, you don't look any different from how you did the previous day, nothing happens.
Most people don't care. I'm still in university and people just think I'm the same age as them. I'm not trying to say I'm a super uwu young looking legal loli, but that you really won't look any different and people can't tell.

No. 348574

This documentary is haunting me, nonnies…
So far my adult life hasn't been fun at all and I haven't achieved any of the things I wanted but the thought of still being in the same miserable place 10 or more years later is killing me. Rn I still have my parents but one day… The thought of having kids terrifies me but I still feel like I need to quit my childish dreaming and find a man asap to be surrounded by more people.
Another thing that really troubles me is having intense yellow fever after a decade of weebness. I'm no 'stacy' either but I really never see a guy in my country who isn't super ugly to me, even if they're still younger than me. And of course each passing year it get's worse and once you cross 30 many will be divorced with kids… I'm so jealous of those young love couples who met when he was young and cute and over the years just stopped caring or are blinded by love.
https://youtu.be/r4g5tqcoH_4?si=5klDrQoFmR4FcB35 (sorry somehow couldn't embed the link?)

No. 348581

As someone who worked as a chat mod for dating apps (really just using fake profiles to keep horny, clingy, creepy moids spending money on these apps, bc their horniness/clinginess/creepyness scare away actual women, a very small percentage seemed decent dudes), I found it surprising how little most moids actually care about looks or youthfulness. I'd have some really haggard-looking women in my userpics and there was always a bunch of men interested, especially young guys. I think the moids who are more vocal about women hitting the wall are mostly the ones who won't even make an effort to get some, or senile moids who want desperately to believe their old, degenerate sperm is worth something. So I've come to terms with my body aging and became comfortable with only going for young (adult ofc) dick. It's been actually been nice, bc unlike women who try to improve as they go through heartbreak, moids only get worse. You might have to guide the more inexperienced here and there, but they're far more open to feedback and willing to please.

To me the worst part of being in my late 30s is my juvenile sense of humor (always been like this even when alone), it just doesn't fit anywhere else and I'm very self conscious about it bc if anything, it's getting worse as I age. I feel like a woman my age shouldn't be laughing at the shit I find funny.

No. 348694

I'm 35 about to be 36 and the only thing I'm a little depressed about is how fast time seems to go. Days are like hours, weeks like days, I blink and another year goes by. Married but no kids so it's not kids that's making life fly by. Any tips on how to get time to move slower nonnies??

No. 348696

Mindfulness, unironically.
Also is anyone else getting tired of this site since there are so many young retarded newfags? The average post quality was better just a few years ago.

No. 348697

just delete the ?si and everything that comes after that and it should work fine

No. 348699

I'm 32 and I feel fine. I guess it helps that people think I'm younger than I look. Also, I realize that I still have a whole life ahead of me. I'm definitely taking better care of myself than I was in my 20s though. Focusing more on my health and doing all the fun stuff I missed out on early on in my life. I think the only downside is that some people think I should have everything put together and figured out completely by now, but that's just unrealistic to me. I'm taking it one day at a time and doing fine.

No. 348700

Divorced with kids at 30? Where do you live, arkansas? Men look fine at 30+ if they took care of themselves and didn't eat a gamer diet and fry their skin in the sun. your whole post is crazy.

your 30s are just your 20s but with money. I look and feel exactly the same at 32 as I did at 18.
men are so retarded they can't even tell if someone is wearing makeup or not. Imagine taking anything a moid says seriously. They're dumb cattle designed to be labor-meat golems; unfortunately their mouths make too many noises. Scrotes really be beer-gutted and malding and talk about ranking 18 year old women for hotness. Men are worthless garbage thinking their burger king crown is real diamonds and gold.

No. 348745

I'm 32 and don't feel that different. I spent all of my 20s in college and grad school so having a career in my field doesn't seem that novel, I guess. It's OK, I like having money and a home. I know I need to have a baby soon if I'm gonna do it…

No. 348747

File: 1694769768894.jpeg (104.58 KB, 828x442, IMG_2478.jpeg)

why do these men want to punish or shame women for growing older? why do they care so much about a women turning 30 and her “eggs”? this guy probably doesn’t even have kids himself lmao, it’s such weird behavior.

I’m turning 30 in 3 months and, yeah it’s a little scary to reach a new point in my life, but I didn’t give a shit befor. Now I see these types of posts all the time and, I still don’t care but it makes me doubt the men around me, are they thinking such weird thoughts ? Do they all view women like this ? it makes me just not want to bother at all with them

No. 348748

>men are so retarded they can't even tell if someone is wearing makeup or not
Not only that, they can't tell a woman's age either

No. 348749

Someone should send him a carton of spoiled milk

No. 348773

To any nonnas approaching 30 that want kids and feel “rushed”, I would say don’t buy into what you are sold by moids and media. Several women in my family had their first kids at 36-38 and the kids have no autism or anything, no health issues, and one of these women was a serious anachan for most of her teens and all the way into her 30s. Your body is resilient and it doesn’t just start rapidly dying at 30 as long as you look after yourself and your reproductive health. I had my first kids at 32 and honestly felt glad I waited. I was not stable enough in my 20s.

No. 348783

Most women have kids after their 30, it's nothing to worry about.

No. 348803

>why do these men want to punish or shame women for growing older? why do they care so much about a women turning 30 and her “eggs”?
probably because no woman wants them, thus malding on twitter about muh women age (just like any other living creature) and no eggs and whatever other bullshit they say

No. 348807

Fucking hell, you're considering chaining yourself to someone and having kids 'to be around more people' but somehow moving or getting a hobby where you talk to people is impossible? I hope you're young and this stems from a Tiktok overdose because this is a fucking grim mindset. Maybe try therapy before you shoot yourself in the foot.

Men are obsessed with passing on their retard genes and don't understand why women are genuinely happy being single and child free. They can't fathom a world where women wouldn't care, would think this was a low effort prank a 12 year old was filming for their Youtube channel, or wouldn't have any idea what the egg carton meant. The thought of a woman over 30 getting pregnant or putting off having kids until she's older is as alien to them as the idea of self improvement.

No. 348869

Because they think they can father children up until their death despite sperm going to shit much sooner than female eggs do and kids fathered at an older age have a drastically increased chance of being born with a mental disability. So they gloat at childless women in their 30's and think they "finally gained the upper hand" living their fantasy of getting to punish the whores who rode the chad cock carousel instead of settling down with a nice man and birthing kids. They think they themselves can still at 45 marry a 20-something virginal woman and start a family with her because daddy Elon told them they could and should and those dead egg women are left crying in the dust after all those babies they will never have. In reality most women who actually want and are able to have kids usually get to do so while scrotes who want to pass on their genes are left alone and the women who are voluntarily child free don't give a shit about a mentally ill incel narrative. They really have this "30something childless stacey who whored around in her 20s and refused to fuck you" archetype stuck in their heads like a broken record.

No. 348873

They believe shaming older women for waiting or deciding not to have kids will somehow make it more likely for the older women to go into panic and have kids with mentally ill or abusive men like themselves, which unfortunately sometimes works.
I knew a 40 or so year old woman whose abusive super religious ex cheated on her and after she went through trauma and got manipulated by him in her bad times, she got married and had a kid with him. Last I heard, she couldn't bond with the kid and the child will have a negligent mother and a cheating father.

No. 348876

Definitely, it's the ultimate revenge fantasy for incels. But also, their hatred of 30+ women isn't for an audience of 30+ women, it's a show they put on for younger women. To make them insecure, desperate, and in a blind rush to be with any man who will have them. The more women willing to settle for less due to time pressure, the better for any average moid trying to get a girl out of his league who he can treat like garbage.

They've always been youth obsessed but their view of age is getting more and more vitriolic and extreme thanks to manosphere/incel radicalization. It used to be about mocking 40+ women who want to get married but are still single due to insanely high standards (only wanting millionaire supermodels) - which is dumb incel shit, but not that crazy. Now it's about mocking 30 year old women just for existing, no matter what they look like, whether they want marriage/kids or how high their standards are. I haven't actually noticed any of this shit irl though, it seems entirely online.

No. 348905

No males don't look great past thirty please don't lie. Pretty much all males I see over 25 are balding if not completely bald, have huge pot bellies and messy beards. It doesn't matter how much they take care of themselves it's just biology. Testosterone ages the body rapidly.

No. 348948

Former semi-NEET and probably austistic, got my first "adult" job in my late 20s. I'm always living with the constant fear of losing my job in this new economic downturn.

In my 20s, I was a dumbass fujoshit coomer who only listened to anime OPs/EDs and never wore sunscreen. I quickly grew out of that upon getting a real job.

Still have some of the same habits as my 20s, but I'm also in the process of developing better habits. Not as terminally online as I used to be. I'm also healthier now, cooking more, improving skincare & losing weight, cleaning & staying tidy a lot more. My 30s are way better than my 20s ever were.

But all of this could disappear just as easily if I lose my job. I'm pretty terrified of falling into a deep depression again and relapsing into my old ways. Everyone has been telling me to work harder on my career and learn new skills but I'm just so overwhelmed by all my other responsibilities, which aren't much to the average person but feel like a lot to someone who was a shut-in for so much of her life. I'm getting better though. I am going to look into courses to improve my skills and hopefully land a better job one day.

One thing I struggle with is avoiding lifestyle inflation. I need to be more careful with my money. I am very careful about my grocery budget and I basically never go out to eat or do stuff, so I save a lot of money that way. But I waste a lot of money shopping online for shit I don't need, or is bad quality. I'm part of a lot of personal finance forums and learning better habits through those.

My current worry is interest rates and whether I'll be able to afford the mortgage on the property I'm planning to buy. I have enough money for a downpayment, but I'm not sure I can pass the stress test.

Thank fuck that I'm no longer obsessed with anime or manga the way I was. Watching literally every anime that came out every season just to keep up with everyone else. Had I spent a quarter of that time on some useful training or self care, I would have been in a much better place than where I am today. And sweet Jesus am I thankful that I didn't grow up with social media to the extent that Zoomers do now.

No. 348949

Damn nonnie, best of luck. There were older students in my courses in college and no one questioned why.

I think my life is taking the same trajectory as yours. My job feels pretty dead end, even though I was promoted with a slight salary bump. I also got a degree for the sake of it, since my parents pushed me into getting one. I never wanted to go to university in the first place.

The only difference is, I'm rather unmotivated & don't really care… as long as I have a job, I'm happy. I know what I need to do to get a better one. And I know that I'm capable of it, and the people I work with depend on me, so maybe the company can't let me go just yet.

I really need to move towards the next step in my career but I don't want to enter any rat race to the top. I just want to earn my keep and enjoy life. It's becoming increasingly harder to do with all these economic uncertainties that keep piling up with each decade. How do quiet quitters pull it off?

No. 348983

I'm so proud of you nonna and I'm wishing you all the best. When things get tough just think about how far you've come already!

With regards to struggling, everyone does - some people are just far better at hiding it.

No. 348988

File: 1694936786224.jpg (32.54 KB, 756x567, soairseronan.jpg)

30+ nonnas here: did/do you feel like you need to make a choice between being independent and having a relationship/family? I'm in my late 20s, I really value my independence and I really like to travel. All I save for is a future mortgage and a travel fund. I felt this way since my late teens, and I've never put arbitrary age-based goals on things (such as marriage/kids etc) because I feel like if I didn't hit those goals it would make me depressed. I wouldn't not count those things out but I wasn't aiming towards them.

But after my last birthday I started to feel more conflicted. I feel like having a committed long term relationship would make me happy but I can't force that with people and I haven't met anyone who I feel that way with.

Additionally, as someone who had (invertedly) neglectful parents and was raised primarily by my grandma I know what its like to not have parents around and I wouldn't want that for my children. But the conflict is that I just love travel so much and I just want to see everything - I know I can't have both and I feel like the next 10+ years of my life are going to be a time of deciding exactly what I want.

As much as I value my independence (and my drive to do what I want) I am also starting to feel more lonely, this didn't bother me when I was younger and I was honestly kind of content to be a volcel - but now I think it's really hitting me, I'm just scared to die alone one day.

So 30+ nonnas: Did any of you feel like this and if so, any womanly advice/wisdom you can offer?

No. 348991

This exactly. It's to hopefully make women panic and lower their standards to find a husband/bf asap and done by men who do not have many dating prospects trying to artificially widen their pool through trickery and fearmongering so they can secure a young and inexperienced (and often naive and low self-esteemed) woman to mold in to their ideal gf/wife (often meaning just a servant). People who truthfully want kids and not to trick women don't ree about women being eggless and hags the minute they turn 30. Men will forever cope about their sexual failure and the fact that most start going bald by that time kek.

No. 348992

I really don't see why you can't travel with a family if that's what you want.

No. 348993

>People who truthfully want kids and not to trick women don't ree about women being eggless and hags the minute they turn 30.
Considering how many couples do IVF, it doesn't even seem like being 'eggless' is a dealbreaker when it's a confirmed reality let alone unscientific speculation about fertility at arbitrary ages.

No. 348994

I'm OP: the answer is money my dear nonna. I'm not from money at all (grandma died penniless) and I doubt I'm going to find some wealthy man willing to wife me, or rather a man that I like that's also wealthy. I make enough to look after myself but not enough to be able to afford to take a family abroad.

You're right some places I really could (and would like to) take a family but there's a lot of places on my bucket list where I really wouldn't or it would be very intense for children. In the words of my mother "Why do you want to visit places where you're going to get blown up or shot at?"

No. 348996

Have you considered that your geriatric boyfriend might be the problem? Sperm quality declines fast after the age of 30. That's why they are not allowed to donate sperm after that age. Expired sperm increases the chances of miscarriage and disability. So many of you chase hideous men in their 40s and 50s and then wonder why you had to spent a fortune on fertility treatments just to get a potato baby.

No. 349000

wtf are you on about, I wasn't talking about myself or couples involving old men. My point is that women with fertility issues still have men so committed to being with them they'll go through the whole expensive, exhausting process of IVF. Meanwhile incels think just turning 30 means a woman will be unwanted based on her fertility.

No. 349012


No. 349019

I'm struggling with this right now too. I don't have a maternal bone in my body and I don't know what to do.

No. 349022

Not just money, traveling with kids means adjusting all of your destinations and plans to be kid-friendly, it restricts your options a lot. And you can't really relax when you have your kids with you on vacation, let's be real.

No. 349030

glad to know I'm not alone here nonna
exactly with regards to my bucketlist I'm leaving a lot of my safer/less intensive destinations (aka Europe/North America) at the bottom because at least if I hit my more daring goals early I won't need to drag any children across MENA countries or Asia.

No. 349043

I'm 28 and life is great, I'm excited to see what the next years bring. My younger 20s were very depressing years working crappy jobs, being poor etc. Now I've built a life for myself that I really love, I have hobbies, friends, a partner. I'm still into cringy weeb shit and vidya but I just don't care what people think anymore.

Style and looks wise I finally worked out my hair type and it no longer looks like shit all the time and I'm in the best physical shape I've ever been.

The incel cope is pure projection, men age worse and they fucking know it

No. 349062

I'm 32 today. I don't feel anywhere near 32 tbh. I've never had a long term relationship, don't have my own place, work a shit job… not feeling great nonas

No. 349159

Mid 30s now, technically the same as ever but since I was born I was always getting less interested and more depressive with ever year and after more than 30 of them I am just rather dead inside since there is nothing new and interesting out there I care about. Not sure how other people do this. Maybe I was just always depressive or something and with adult life being 500 times more boring than any year during childhood the depressions get much worse as well, no idea.

Currently NEETing again since having fulltime jobs makes me borderline suicidal. Was never interested in a relationship, I only ever cared about a few good friends I once had but somehow I feel like it's impossible to make genuine friendships as an adult and since they lack the whole "common origin" part they feel empty and other people feel alien.

No. 349182

I could have written this. The life long depression, how everything gets worse the older i get, the isolation, not being able to connect with people. I think we are just really ill.

No. 349183

It's sad but it calms me a bit to know that there are others. For the longest time I thought it was normal and that everybody else was just stronger than me and forcing themselves to live normal lives, but now I rather feel like most people in real life feel better, not worse, once they hit the 30s. I know so many that are more motivated than ever and painfully optimistic.

Thinking about it I cannot even muster enough motivation to draw what I should like. I drew so much as kid and till my early 20s. Now I force myself and need half a year for a single pic. Thing is that drawing is inherently emotion related, at least to me. I drew because I vented or expressed emotions. But now I lost them, so there is not enough to express anymore. You are probably right and we are just mentally fucked.

No. 349197

I'm here to tell you that I feel the same. I'm still hopeful that my interest in the living world will come back as I missed out on so much stuff being younger because of how self-destructive and depressed I have been back then.

I can also fully relate to the drawing stuff. I drew every day until I turned 20 and then I just stopped, I maybe have one picture that I drew the last 10+ years and it's sad. But I was way angrier and I feel like I had more emotions back then. It's amazing that what you have written is exactly like how I feel.

I'm still going on with my life, being a neet as I hate most humans, accumulating more knowledge, just wishing to be rich to be free of what society expects me to do and having to work until I die. People actually think that I know what I'm doing and that I'm not faking every single emotion they get from me. But like I wrote before, I still think that there is a possibility to get back what I felt years before, to be not this depressed anymore that I'm even too depressed to kill myself. I've survived so long, now I can add some more years just out of spite.
I hope you and nonna >>349182 will feel better one day and the three of us will have an amazing, quiet and nice life.

No. 349243

Second nonna here again, I used to do a ton of art too. I thought I'd go to art school. I don't think I drew more than 2 or 3 times in the last 7 years.
I really think we should seek help. I've been putting it off for so long because of bad experiences I had with therapists in my teens but living like I'm already dead isn't a solution. Good luck nonnies.

No. 349245

NTA but I used to draw so much in my youth too and eventually got really good at it. Then after submitting my final piece to my high school art exam that I worked extremely hard on and took months, I decided I was exhausted with art and I haven’t made any kind of art since in like a decade now. I can’t believe how creative I used to be and now I don’t have the inspiration or energy to do anything but consume other peoples media at best. It sucks, I wish I still had the will to create stuff.

No. 349252

File: 1695107817687.jpg (110.46 KB, 650x813, fran.jpg)

Friendly reminder for those of you feeling like 30+ is the end that Fran Drescher was in her mid 30s-early 40s when she was starring in The Nanny.
Incels seethe harder.

No. 349253

a queen, an icon.

No. 349269

Oh my god she was my first tv crush as a kid lmao I watched reruns of the Nanny with sparkling eyes full of hearts tbh she gave me a type kek

No. 349307

I feel this way at times, but most of the pressure about kids/family comes from my parents and just how much emphasis society puts on it. I can imagine a happy life that way, but tbh I like being able to do anything I want when I want and think I might end up miserable if I was tied down and didn’t have time for the stuff that does actively make me happy. I used to tell my mom I didn’t really want kids and that hasn’t really changed now that I’m mid-thirties. The only way I would is if I had a wife who really wanted them. I do worry for how things will be when I’m old and senile though. Hopefully I’ll die in an accident at like 70 or something.

No. 349337

OP Here: Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts nonna. I completely share your thoughts about wanting to be able to do something when I want and I do think I would be miserable if I couldn't. Whilst I have this mentality I know it would be incredibly cruel to have children and raise them like this. I've always considered adoption, as that means I don't need to worry about a time limit on conceiving my own children.

With regards to growing old and senile I'm annoyed that assisted suicide is not an option - I don't want to become a prisoner in my body and as soon as I lose control I want out.

No. 349355

My only beef with being in my 30s is that every decent man I've ever been with wants kids. The ones that didn't were weird internet communists, edgy alt guys and the like. Even my current bf wants them, but it's so easy for men to want kids when they aren't the ones putting their everything on the line. I feel like I have to either choose companionship or eternal solitude. And to be honest, I'd love the solitude if I had the money to move into a castle and have hired help, Enya-style. As it is I detest the thought of just being a wagie that everyone pities and feels sorry for, even if I'm very happy without kids. People looking down on me hurts more than childlessness ever will.

No. 349365

How do y’all feel about that popular phrase “30s is the new 20s”, is this accurate? For me, I feel like it could be. I haven’t changed much physically or mentally. I’m still the same person that I was at 20 - but with more money and stability. What do nonnies think? In this day and age are 30s just an extension of 20s?

No. 349367

Please give positive or reasonable responses to this one because the idea itself gives me hope and I come here to be uplifted since I’ve been fearing the great big 30 since 20 lol

No. 349368

I feel you, I never wanted kids and I also dread the thought of people treating me worse because of being childless. But we shouldn't create new human beings just because society wants us to, even when we don't even want it

No. 349373

I really need support from some over 30s girlies, some positive talk and encouraging stories because I hit 28, almost 29 and I’m terrified. Whenever I think about my age I have a panic attack. Need positive perspective. Specifically in regards to looks/still being attractive past 30. Please help! I’m so so scared.

No. 349380

It's hard to feel inclined to help or support someone who seems to think anyone over 30 is a hideous old hag, you've met women a year older than you before, right? Did you have a panic attack about how much uglier they are than you? Get therapy and stop being so fucking vain.

No. 349383

I wouldn't agree with that statement at all personally from what I remember doing in my 20s and what I'm doing now in my 30s.

One of my law professors back in uni said it best, the 20s is an unstable period of finding yourself out and trying different stuff out like in teen years but with the freedom of being an actual adult. So you kinda tend to start stuff, or do spontaneous things like visiting people you befriended at a meet and greet in a big town/during a convention, you meet different types of people. And you discover that the grass isn't greener elsewhere or people aren't as nice as they make themselves out to be. And you slowly learn that you gotta rely on yourself to get some shit done, nobody will do your tax declaration or job search for you after uni.

Then in your 30s you kinda figured out what you're about, you get your career path, living in your own flat/apartment/house without roommates figured out and/or family goals. And hopefully because of the 20s you went through, you know the traps to avoid with colleagues, with life/work balance, with savings etc.

Maybe it's because I've had 7 years of my 20s that were rough that I can't call my chill 30s "the new 20s", other nonnas might agree with that statement of yours. I personally rate the 30s as better for someone who seeks mental stability than to call them the new 20s when I know the mental instability I have been at then.

No. 349385

You realize that somebody's insecurities and fears aren't a personal insult to you, right? I am in the same shoes as that anon and I have similar thoughts - NOT because I think lowly women over 30, but because it is a new and unfamiliar stage of my life. She was just looking for reassurance ffs

No. 349386

Odd question but will 20-something women always be more beautiful and “wanted” by most men as compared to 30+, or is it just a meme? Is it possible to be more beautiful than a 20yo at 30+? I just want to know.

No. 349387

She's having PANIC ATTACKS over this shit, that's not the same as being a bit nervous about a new stage of your life. I can't even imagine the disdain she must feel for other women if she's that terrified of becoming one of them.

No. 349388

Thank you lol exactly

No. 349397

I feel no disdain towards older woman. But I am scared of getting older, on a personal level. My biggest fear is the passage of time. It really causes me to panic. Everyone says 20s are supposed to be your prime and the best years of your life, and I’ve heard men say 20-somethings are preferable and more beautiful. Which is hurtful to me as I approach 30, and probably the patriarchy caused this but I’m afraid of losing my looks and value in the eyes of society

No. 349398

Honestly, I’ve enjoyed my 30s so much more than my 20s. I feel so much less insecure than I did. I know it’s not the case for everyone, but it has been for me personally.
I felt this feeling so much when I was in my 20s. The “hurt”. Now that I’m past the that period of my life, the anxiety of aging has seemed to get less. You will always have value nona, and despite what some men will think, there will always be people who admire and find you beautiful at any age.

No. 349400

It's redpill/manosphere fantasy from the online loser dateless men who believe they're "average", their "preferences" matter, and woe the average men is lonely.
There was a moment when a discount redpill influencer was online bragging about pulling women onto his (rented) yacht and that he doesn't do women under 25. One of the women came out a few days later saying he (and RP influencers do this too) hired her and the other girls from OnlyFans and also they're 30+, but these dumbfucks can't tell the age of women. They also date women from sugaring sites who lie about their age too.
But honestly, most socially normal average men aren't like this. Most men and women date and marry within age range. The average age gap for marriage is like 2~3 years. Most normal people want someone relatable.

And I didn't really get my life and routine together until my very late 20s (when I got my career). Working out, yoga, eat healthy, etc so now I feel and look better than I did younger and lazy. Wear sunscreen and figure out a skincare routine (retinal, moisturizer, vit c). Most people look as good or better in their 30s because of skincare, finally have money to be comfortable, got their shit together, etc. So don't worry about it too much if you can follow a healthy lifestyle.

No. 349431

>assisted suicide
Ayrt and Me. Too. I know people view it as taboo, but I truly think it should be allowed within reason so that people can choose to die in a medically safe way, especially if they don’t have anyone to help care for them as they age (or for the reasons it does exist wrt terminal illness). It’s so much more humane than someone going out by shooting themselves or taking loads of pills. Sorry to derail but I agree with you on that.

No. 349435

Idk why people think their looks will 100% fade in their 30s. There are a ton of women I think are in their twenties and later find out that they’re actually thirty-something. These hangups are weird and unhealthy. You don’t become a grandma overnight. Just take care of yourself with food/exercise/water/sunscreen and you’ll probably be doing yourself a load of favor. Plus, being confident about how you look no matter what your age is endlessly more attractive than stressing out about it and being neurotic over it 24/7. One of the most depressing things to me is watching women in their 30s/40s/50s who obsess over looking young forever. I know society influences this way of thinking but it’s so unfortunate. Would rather be with someone or be friends with someone who embraces the wrinkles and gray hairs they obtain rather than having a meltdown over every new one. Sorry to sound harsh, but the mindset is bad for you and everyone who interacts with you.

No. 349453

This as fuck lmao I’m 32 and constantly am mistaken for 21-25 by…pretty much anyone who doesn’t know me. Most of my friends are the same. As long as you are healthy and take good care of your skin/use a lot of SPF, you’re not going to look much different from your 20s. You may lose some baby fat and have poppin cheekbones too, which is dope. That being said I also agree that the trap of women thinking they need to look forever youthful to be beautiful/desirable is moid created garbage. Some of my fav pretty actresses have become even more beautiful to me now that they’re in their 40s-50s.

No. 349474

>I've been putting it off for so long because of bad experiences I had with therapists in my teens
First poster here, same here. Though I think it helps that years or decades have passed since then and that we are adults that can properly talk about what's bothering us now. As teen everybody just assumed I was crazy or weird so they shoved the kid into the therapists' room to make it normal, but they were clearly not trained for the problems I had. It was obvious that the problems they usually dealt with were kids with love trouble, fear of bad school grades or mundane issues with the parents, not kids that were depressive, autistic or something along the lines.
It's probably depression I think. Or a mix between depression and ADHD. Not that I got any proper help so far. Finding a therapist is literally impossible here and psychiatrists are often mediocre and don't even take the time to listen. Well, we should at least try I think.

My cousin I only recently told me that he relies on antidepressants. He is the typical juvenile middle aged cool guy I never expected to have this. But my other cousin (his sister) committed suicide years ago, so I think we should at least try to get that checked because it sounds like it was slowly worsening for all of us. Probably because the issue itself causes further issues like the inability to work for longer periods and that more years are passing in which I try but fail to do anything, making me more pessimistic and tired.

I totally relate with this. I drew so much, then I visited an art school were I was forced to draw and even after quitting soonish, after half a year or so, I was stunned and incapable of even doing a sketch for years and generally drew less ever since, even when I was still drawing more.
I think I can only do what I really wanted to and it needs to be personal, take that away and a formerly great hobby gets tainted. This is why I swore to myself to never ever do commissions even if I should learn to draw more regularly again, even after people asked me for it.
>other peoples media at best. It sucks, I wish I still had the will to create stuff.
Same. I once even drew tons of manga pages of own stories and worked on a RPG maker game for two years. Time of my life, despite the social isolation (though I wasn't even craving anything else). I wish I could get that back.

No. 349488

Turned 30 5 months ago, so far yes absolutely. Lots of people say your 30s is like your 20s but with money and I disagree. It's not even about the money. I just felt my brain switch from "I hate myself, I'm so cringe and everyone hates me" to "I'm kind of a Stacy actually" in the first few weeks. Mental illness? Don't know her.
The best part is I don't give a fuck about anything anymore. I don't care if I'm ugly, I like how I look. I don't care about other people's opinions, I like how I dress. I've been so confident it's unreal. I'm even better in bed. I feel so silly for having literally cried about turning 30 for the past 5 years. It's great.
Worst part is pimply teens on the internet calling you 'middle aged' and using your age as an insult, and incels posting egg carton pictures, but trust me you'll live.

No. 349678

The discussions about "looks fading" itt makes me glad that I've always been ugly kek, nothing to fade here

No. 349830

File: 1695497640001.gif (846.95 KB, 372x200, source.gif)

I feel so hopeless. My 20s were so miserable and went by so fast, mentally I'm still at the same point as after hs graduation, same interests, same dreams, everything. I only survived this far by constantly fleeing into daydreams - which make the reality feel even worse.
When I was younger I somehow never imagined that I had a life after 30, everything I like and always wanted are young people things. I can't and don't want to imagine myself as not young.
This week I got my first big girl paycheck and seeing that sum made me feel so detached from reality, like what am I supposed to do with this, I don't need or want that much money and much less that job, I just want to finally be happy…

At 20 I somehow always assumed all my problems would fix itself, that I'd magically stop being a weeb and on imageboards in my mid 20s, that I'd suddenly know what I want in life, that I'd just happen to find hobbies, friends and a partner, but instead nothing. Each year just gets worse. Back then young me reading about lc anons like todays me would have found me so pathetic.
At 25 I finally started therapy, thinking this is still youngish and that I'd be fixed by now but again, nothing. Instead all those other shit suddenly hits me too, like the fear of turning 30, feeling jealous of my thriving 18yo sister, suddenly believing incels and thinking I will die alone if I don't get kids immediately and so on.
I feel like I have to make a decision right now - either my unrealistic dreams which likely end in loneliness or having a family which likely ends in deep regret…

If I was a moid I'd likely already packed my bags and gone to LA or Tokyo. Technically there probably are more famous women but only because they sold their body and soul. Meanwhile moids can make it anywhere at any age, not just in Hollywood but in any career. And at the same time they don't need to give up family either. Or they can just start one at 50, they have endless choices.
Recently I read that David Bowie had a baby in his early 20s, while he was still trying to make it. And afterward he led a crazy wild life. But that doesn't matter, he got women anyway because women don't care and give their partner any freedom on earth. For them having a family or not doesn't have to change any of their dreams. Meanwhile if I as a woman close to 30 told a moid that I'm not content with my boring job and that I can't imagine myself having children in any near future, I'd be seen as unstable and undateable. If I hear muh 5-year-plan one more time I swear…
It just feels so unfair that they don't need to make this insanely difficult decision like us.
My biggest wish is probably to go back in time and try to grow up normal or to stop time and live as my parents child forever, I'm just a failure of an adult.

No. 349836

>Meanwhile moids can make it anywhere at any age, not just in Hollywood but in any career. And at the same time they don't need to give up family either. Or they can just start one at 50, they have endless choices
This, it's so unfair. But I also want all of us to remember that it keeps happening even now because there are women enabling this lifestyle for men. There are women who are ok with this. If there was no women content with taking care of children and houses for men, the men couldn't live in Neverland forever and fuck around forever
I know it's also important to remember that, generally speaking, most men can't allow this life either and they are unwantwd and undatable. But it still makes me envy those men who can live like this, even though that's not general male population I think. I also dreamed once about being a famous artist, an actress or a musician. But I grew more bitter over time, seeing what women had to do in order to become famous compared to what men had to do… it was laughable. I could never do this. I still have hopes for becoming a digital and traditional artist though, and maybe a streamer (I would mostly stream art). But even that makes me paranoid. If I revealed that I'm a female, they would sooner or later find out my age somehow and I'm scared how that would affect my position. I never had any social media so they wouldn't find my data online, but I think that at one point someone who knew or still knows me irl could recognize me and post my age. Maybe it's better to just never show my face or wear a fucking mask or something

No. 349847

I'm nearing 30 and began to notice how early 20s women dominate my hobbies and the places I like to hang out at. Feels like people my age are doing more domestic things I guess, I'm in a weird spot where I don't want younger friends but I keep having to share social spaces with people younger than me.

No. 349857

I discovered I really love going to metalcore and barely-metalcore nucore concerts, being in the pits, but almost everyone there is college aged or younger, and the bands are younger than me too. I turned 30 in July and started going over a year ago. I never felt I belonged anywhere in my life so it sucks that this too I’m out because of my age.

No. 349861

This is sort of happening to me online. Just when I'm starting to feel comfortable about myself in my late 20s (because I stopped being insecure about being "too old" for things), I notice people the same age leaving behind hobby communities and younger people coming in.

No. 349863

Every year I have less and less in common with my group of friends. I'm finally throwing in the towel and trying to make new friends but yeah >>349847 this right here. I told one girl I went to my first con in 2003 and she wanted me to tell her stories about the good ol' days like I'm her grandma or something.

On the other hand, half the groups I join I'm the youngest there by 30 years. I managed to find one meetup group with some women closer to my age, but they all have children and it's literally all they talk about. I just want some girlfriends to hang out with who don't have kids to put to bed or homework due in the morning

No. 349864

File: 1695524386022.jpg (41.84 KB, 625x338, tobeing30.jpg)

I'm going to soon be in my mid 30's and I feel nothing because age is meaningless to me as a legal adult. The main thing I learned after turning 30 was to just stop giving so much of a fuck. There will always be someone younger than me, more attractive, more stable in their life, more accomplished and it is what it is. I learned to stop listening to others opinions that have nothing to do with me. I got sterilized despite my parents being upset they will never have grandchildren because fuck them kids I have never been "maternal", and its not my fucking job to make others happy at the expense of myself. Shit has always been the same, I've just gained insight through life experience. I tried the traditional route of getting married, going to school and having a career to support my future family but I always go back to my true self. I am not a mother, I am not a wife, I'm not a dog of the state, I'm a motherfucking autonomous person dammit. It's my life and I will choose to live it out the way I'd like it to be. Being a woman in this world is hard but I haven't felt so in touch with the power women hold until now. I live my life with one thing in mind, never saying "I wish I did xyz". If you wanna do it then do it, and if anyone catches an attitude fuck em.

No. 349868

God I feel this so much. Hobby groups are either just young kids, so it makes you even more conscious about being old(er), or it's people your age who only care about weddings or worse kids, or it's older women whose kids are out of their house or they're retired and therefore bored and picking up hobbies again.
Where are all those unmarried women everybody is talking about?
What makes it more difficult for me is that I don't have any positive non-traditional rolemodels in my life, I only know older married women. I'm scared that the unmarried ones really are lonely and hiding in their homes, or that they don't really exist, that getting married is so natural that just everybody does it and so should I?

I know that not all moids do this but at least they can afford to try.
When I was younger I always wanted to live life without regret but now it suddenly feels as if the risks are just way too high…

No. 349871

good for you nona. do your motherfucking thing

No. 349888

I'm in my late 20s with a lot of friends turning 30 soon and when they seem bummed out I always say to them "but you're gonna be thirty, flirty and thriving" because of this movie kek

No. 349893

I’m nearing the wrong side of 35. I have accomplished absolutely nothing in terms of what is the cultural norm for humans.
I don’t have a good job, I’m not married, I don’t have children (I don’t want kids) or own any property.
I am not poor or in any debt, but I have no friends and crippling anxiety.
My advice is (if you’re in the same position/feel anxious) please for the love of god just have fun. Do all the things that make you happy, spend the money, book that holiday, buy that car.
When you get old and die none of that stuff goes with you.
I have been miserable for years and I’m only just coming to terms with the fact none of this bullshit really matters as long as you are happy and healthy.

No. 349906

Amen, nonna. I’m right there with you.

No. 349907

I'm 28 and this year it was like a switch flipped. I've started eating better and exercising, which is resulting in weightloss. I'm still obese but it is going down. I started actually making time for all the things I have wanted to do and can keep a good schedule.

My mental health is better and I'm doing well in my career. The only things I haven't been able to do yet is buy a house or be in a relationship. I'm in the process of saving for a deposit and by then I'm expecting some payrises and/or a promotion which will make it a lot easy. The fact I have never been in a relationship hurts a lot less than it did before. And although I want one I would be fine to be on my own, especially in a place of my own. I like my own company. I can't wait to be entering my 30s because it'll mean I have progressed even further and improved. I'll be a healthy weight and good job.

No. 349919

I think I'm delusional about my age because despite being 28 people still assume I'm like 20 not only because of my looks but also because of my stunted behavior, and I'm always paranoid they will find out my actual age. I'm scared to think how I would behave if I didn't look that young. I also can't find a place for myself. I'm nothing like the people my age I know; I'm not in the dating field, I never dated anyone actually, I'm not interested in having a family, at least for now, I don't have a serious career etc. But at the same time I feel too old to be around actual 20 year olds. There's no place for me to go honestly and I don't know what to do in order to create some kind of a social circle

No. 349947

I'm early 30s and I feel similar, I feel out of place with 28+ women in real life and a lot of 20+ year olds are super immature. Ironically, people tend to think I'm cool and are impressed when they find out my age (I mask my spergery at work), but I feel like I wasted too much of my 20s and am lacking life experience I should've had. I lost contact with my highschool friends a decade ago and most late 20s-early 30s seem to be settled in their friend groups or lifestyle to want to find more.

No. 349968

File: 1695629404784.gif (394.6 KB, 400x218, IMG_3012.gif)

I’m 33 and feel like I had a fairly uncommon 20s experience than my friends. I had a kid pretty early (like before the legal drinking age) graduated college with a BA but ended not using it because clients have shit taste, and got married at 25. I knew him since middle school and was not gonna risk playing the field and possibly exposing my daughter to some sick fuck.

My 20s were filled with a constant pressure to provide her a better life and not become exactly what the world already thought of young, single unwed mothers. I dont resent her for that, but i resent the unfair expectations held on moms vs dads.

My girlfriends are all single without kids so I live vicariously through them. I love hearing about their trips to Thailand or about the cute guy in their apartment building. Unfortunately they're also all scared theyll end up alone. The one that hits hardest is my sister whos a bit older. Shes constantly traveling and meeting up with old friends but once told me she just wants to feel wanted. Meanwhile I’m on the other side wishing I had the time and freedom she does. Is the grass not green enough on the other side no matter what?

No. 349973

There's pros and cons to every situation, I think people have a hard time seeing and appreciating the nice things about their situation when they look at the desireable parts of another's situation.

No. 349996

I’m glad you shared your story, nonna. I’m one of the people on the other side (unmarried, no kids), but I honestly appreciate hearing about the people who did these things early, and I do think it takes a weird bit of bravery to talk about it more candidly because women are so expected to adore marriage and children. If nothing else, I hope you get to travel and do a lot of fun stuff when your kid gets older, and I hope you’re doing well now overall.

No. 350008

I turn 30 next spring and truthfully I'm the happiest I've ever been. My childhood was absolutely shit, my teenage years were also shit, early twenties filled with terrible decisions and alcoholism. I met my nigel at 24 and we've been together since. We have a daughter, a business and another child on the way. There are days when I'm super pissed at my nigel for being a man, but he's a genuinely good guy and would do anything for us. I adore my daughter, and I'm more confident than I've ever been in my entire life. When I hit 30 I think I'll feel like I hit a milestone. I'm not dead, we're successful and have a really cute family. We broke the cycle of abuse I was exposed to and our entire family has rallied around my daughter which has been awesome. Truly it's night and day, so I guess I feel like the next decade is going to be the best of my life. I'm stoked. As a teen I was terrified of being 30, now I'm embracing it fully. Really glad so many nonnas feel the same despite different situations.

No. 350043

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how i handle it: buy midlife crisis floor loom, steal plant cuttings constantly, & consider it all apart of my karensona.

No. 350128

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I'm going to be 30 next year and I didn't think it would hit me this hard, but it has. Originally I was planning on killing myself right after high school, and have tried a couple of times but was stopped. I never put any effort into my future since I figured I was going to die soon anyway, and now here I am 10 years later with nothing to show for it except a crappy retail job I've begun to resent, no higher schooling whatsoever, no skills, and a dwindling friend circle. I have a small business selling my art but even with both of my incomes combined I make less than 20k, and now my illness and anxiety has made it extremely hard to work. I blamed external reasons before, but really this is all my own fault. Once I'm done with my pity party, I can either try to get my shit together or die. We'll see which one I pick.

No. 350162

Hey nonnie, I’m in the exact same boat. I wish we could be friends. You sound a lot like me… I was reading this post thinking “did I post this?”. Wish I could reach out. Regardless I suppose we’re in this together.

No. 350173

I turned 35 a couple weeks ago. If you make it to my age unmarried you'll be probably like one or two of your female peers who aren't. People have been marrying later, it's true, but by 35 most of your old HS/college friends will have been married if only briefly.
Anyway, this changes the dynamic between you and your married friends. They'll assume you want to be married, try to set you up with guys, or at least recommend guys to you. Even if they complain about their marriages constantly they'll do this. It's really annoying. Oh and you get to see them less because couples often have these dinner parties that are unofficially on a 'couples only' guest list.

No. 350207

Aww nonnie, ive been feeling funny about entering my 20s, but to hear that you’ve made it work, and that you can break cycles of abuse, really gives me hope. I’m glad you have success and confidence, I hope to get to where you are ♥

No. 350243

I feel like this dynamic shift already happened in my early 20s when they all had mostly steady partners, then they all got married and had babies while I was still in uni, so I felt like we're living completely different lifes.
Nobody ever tried to set me up tho, I guess I don't have close enough friends for that…

I'm so fucking worried about never finding a bf the older I get because I don't want to settle. Sometimes I feel downright pedoish because white moids above 20 look tragic. And once they're approaching 30, they're all fat, bearded, balding and so boring, plus likely expect you to want babies because as a moid why not?

I wonder whether I should study again. I actually just finished (my major takes a long time in my country) and now have a high paying job, employed by the state.
But I hate it so much. Plus I'm not ready to be a proper adult yet, I never got to enjoy being young, so I kinda want a second chance? But if I didn't manage to make friends and have fun in uni at 20, how should I manage as an older student…
Everything feels so hopeless, this is the opposite of what I imagened my life would be when I was a child.

No. 350291

Yep it's already happening with my friend group. And the worst thing is when they suggest someone and the guy is just a massive ugly incel. Like is this the best they think I can get? I know I'm worth more than that at least.

No. 350296


It’s a shit show, just like social media is now. The internet sucks and was my only outlet for years.

I spent all of my 20s hiding from my abusive family via a narc relationship & he left me for a 19 y/o. My life is currently the opposite of everything I worked towards. I have no degrees, no car, no career, no apartment, no hobbies, no friends, no passion, no faith. I used to have/be achieving all of that successfully though. But I fucked it all up & tbh death is preferred. I ended up in a psych ward from it all & nothing has felt real since. Every day is a nightmare. Working up the courage to down pills on 30th coming up

No. 350311

Nonnie, you and I are in a similar boat. I dreamed of romance ever since I was a kid, in many ways because of my parents' happy marriage. I also feel a lot of pressure to find a good person to settle down with now that I am approaching my 30s because like you said, the longer we wait to find a romantic partner, the less good choices we'll have. It's really not a meme that good guys get snatched up fast, whereas there are brilliant single women across all age ranges.

But I think it's even worse for our generation! In a month, I can honestly count the number of guys I have found attractive on the street where I live. It's not a big city, but it's also not the middle of nowhere. You cannot deny that the internet has ruined men. There's this one guy who works in a different department from me and from our interactions, I thought he was 35 at best. He has balding unkempt greasy hair, horrible style, and is overweight. One day we were talking and he goes "oh, I just turned 25!" And I was like???? No fucking way you're younger than I am and you look like this!!!

But nonna, don't give up finding friends at an older age! I found my best friends while living abroad, completely by happenstance. You never know when and where you find people you click with. Don't give up on happiness and silliness in life!

No. 350400

Hi anon, I dropped a throwaway. It would be nice to talk to someone in a similar situation.

No. 350405

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Still 28, but I'll be 29 in a couple of months. During the new years transition into 2020, I felt this horrible pang of dread realizing that youth was passing me by, but that dissipated instantly once the clock struck midnight. Approaching the end of my 20's doesn't feel that way to me, at least not yet, but hopefully it just doesn't rise at all. On the contrary, my husband is sweating about turning 30 this year, kek. I'm ready to gracefully enter this new decade of my life; it's not like it really has a meaning unless I give it one, I'm a healthy individual even compared to my colleagues in their early 20s. I am finishing up my Associates at a community college this semester, finally, and I anticipate that when I go on to uni, I may feel embarrassed by those 10 years younger than me taking the dame courses. Oh, well!

No. 350412

>leave family to be with pedo male
>spend her youth worshipping pedo male instead of studying, working, investing etc.
>Hope to one day marry him and have him support you fully
>Pedo male leaves you because you're 30,unemployed, broke and mentally ill
The average tradwife wannabe timeline

No. 350414

Anon it’s pretty hard to kill yourself with just pills, especially if they’re just over the counter. I’d recommend not going through with that particular plan because it’ll likely just give you more hospital bills and physical pain.

No. 350416

Suicide bait in the vent thread next time.

No. 350418

I was in a similar situation to you so I kinda get it. Before you kill yourself try to do something else drastic but non-deadly like move long distance and get a job in hotels (not that it’s an awesome job it just has a lot of entry level positions and upward movement for lifeless zombies who can do fake-it-til-you-make-it and don’t have a lot going on in their lives so they can work all hours to distract from wanting to die.) it really helped me and I made money to travel and had a better life.

No. 350503

I have a really insecure question… I’m 28 and never loved my bikini body. I’ve been working really hard to tone, slim and get in shape so that I feel confident in a bikini. Tonight at our public pool, I was feeling semi okay about myself until a very slim perfect bodied 20-something came strutting in looking like a model in her bikini. Then I started feeling really nervous. Is it even possible for me to have a cute, slim bikini body once I reach/pass 30, or is that sort of thing just out of the question for me now? Insecure, like I said. But feeling so horrible about myself.

No. 350505

lift weights

No. 350508

I guess I just feel discouraged now. I was going for slim but toned, like skinny with some muscle but is that even a thing for 30+? I’m already naturally skinny, but will I ever be able to achieve my body goals now that I’m leaving my 20s?

No. 350509

I’ve heard really good things about weight training, I’ll give that a go

No. 350516

Don't compare yourself to other women. She probably saw you and wished she had your body too, that's usually how it works. Skinny women wish they were curvier and curvier women wish they were muscular. You can always start exercising but starting exercises because you're jealous of random women is very counterproductive, it's impossible to achieve someone's else's body so you should set a goal for yourself that's not tied to anyone.

No. 350519

No, us 30-somethings all turn into fat Karens on the midnight of our 30th birthday. There aren't any 30+ fitness instructors on YouTube and celebrities in their 30s are all obese grandma hags.
Is that what you wanna hear? Do you even realize how mean and unhinged you sound?

No. 350522

I don’t mean to sound mean. I just meant, can I have the body I aimed for in my 20s, like can I look as good as a 20-something in a bikini, or will my metabolism/body structure change making that impossible. I apologize, I know there are beautiful women at every age. I’m just not sure if my goals are attainable anymore

No. 350531

Metabolism changes occur around menopause and getting fat and flabby in your 30s only happens because you have more responsibilities, kids and less time. Or, you have an underlying hormonal issue that went undetected in your 20s. It's a myth that your metabolism gradually slows down as you age, google it.

No. 350532

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I don't know where you got the idea that you can't build muscle and workout after your 20s but it's absolutely, 100% doable. I'd be more concerned if you couldn't. Your body doesn't rot and become useless once you reach 30 years old. Metabolism changes happen later in life, at like 70 years old. Even then the change is slight, around 100-200 calories. Picrel is a 60 year old.

No. 350535

This would be a great opportunity to post older women we look up to. This lady is 70 and is in amazing shape. It's my goal to be like her.

No. 350536

Sorry, 71! If anyone else has other examples, I'd love to see them. They are very inspiring. And they don't even have to be fitness-related, just awesome women accomplishing things at older ages.

No. 350537

I actually love this idea it would be so uplifting

No. 350542

Agreed. Take this with a grain of salt, but I remember hearing about a study that showed that your metabolism doesn't actually significantly change until around age 60. Which adds up with anons mentioning menopause.
What changes is just people's lifestyles, and they use that + the metabolism myth as an excuse.
Basically the second people move out from home and mommy didn't stop them from consuming all the shit fast food they want or drive them to sport practice every week - paired with high calorie alcohol partying etc… makes people gain weight and then they blame it on "not being young anymore" despite many of them still being like 25 when they start using the excuse lol

No. 350547

keep in mind that even if you achieve your perfect bikini body, your insecurity seems to run too deep to be cured by it. anyway, I do agree with the nonny recommending lifting. I love it and it has done good for me but I focus on how it makes my body feel and how strong I've gotten over how my body looks. I have a belly at 18 BMI so I'd probably go crazy if I cared about having a cute bikini body.

No. 350550

Still a virgin at 30 and at this point I've accepted I'll never have sex, not that I mind actually. I always had this nagging feeling it wouldn't happen to me since I learned what sex was, and even though I had a few opportunities I didn't grab them because the moids were unattractive. I feel like I'm a bit mentally stunted because I've never dated but on the other hand I feel like I live on easy mode with being spared of the stress induced by relationship bullshit.

No. 350573

Anyone else have difficult keeping their old friend group together and remaining engaged? It's not even friends starting families like what I used to think would make maintaining a social life difficult eventually but more a lack of shared interests and generally growing apart. Until our mid twenties or so it was always the educational setting and partying that put and kept us together, but now that we're in our late 20s that phase is kinda over, and I feel like we've realized how little we actually have in common when we're not drinking and partying.

No. 350597

I wish I had better advice for you, but I experienced this with nearly all the friends I made in my 20's. Sometimes friendships change, especially after the party stage. Looking back, we were all hot messes leaning on each other to get through that time. Now that that era is over, so too are those relationships. Sure, we might text on holidays or birthdays. I would still see them if they came into town. But the relationships simply aren't the same. I guess for me, I embraced that they were there for a season and that's okay. I can still appreciate and value those friendships for what they were at the time.

No. 350669

I disliked male attention in my 20s so I abstained from makeup, was hairy, wore exclusively t-shirts, and in general had many self-imposed rules of modesty. I am 30 and have been exploring femininity because I'm wiser and the opinions of random strangers matter less. Even though I understand my younger self, I kind of resent that I "wasted" those years not leaning into hotness. Like I missed my opportunity to pull off certain looks. Sometimes I feel silly, like I'm an old hag trying to look young. Wish I grew some balls earlier.

No. 350670

My uncle is ripped and objectively good-looking (saying this to illustrate that he definitely doesn't have a lack of options). He's 50 and has a gf who's his age. She broke up with him for a little while and there was this beautiful 25-year-old girl at his sailing club who was coming onto him strong. They went on one date, he said she's nice but her age and inexperience weird him out and he can't relate to her. (He didn't tell me personally, I overheard it when he vented to my parents.) Instead, he kept fighting for his then-ex, they worked through their issues and they got back together. This showed me that not all men are shallow and only lust after 20-somethings, that some of them will choose a woman their age whom they can relate to and trust over a pretty young woman.

No. 350676

If a man is mentally healthy his preferences will change to his age, hence why old people are able to be attracted to other old people. Porn blurs the line between aesthetics and actual attraction as someone you can see yourself enjoying sex with, hence why porn addicted men often obsess over unrealistically proportioned body parts even though that's just not realistic and even if that was possible it wouldn't be tactical for sex. They confuse the idea of thinking someone looks good with sexual attraction

No. 350688

I think it is attainable for me, I just have to work for it. Maybe it will be possible at 30+, I’m 5’6 and don’t have extra body fat with a flat tummy. My legs and ass need to be toned, though. I usually weigh between 115-130, but due to meds I’ve been around 140. I worked with my doctor and lowered the meds which has resulted in significant weight loss so far. I’m hoping that if I tone up and get back to 115-120lbs I’ll be less insecure at the pool… inb4 anorexia insults - I do struggle with ED since 12 years old. I try my best to not let it consume my life. Entering my 30s has always frightened me in terms of my body composition changing. But I’m childfree and don’t plan on having kids, so I don’t think I need to worry as much as I do. Sage for rant.

No. 350787

It’s impossible to know if dressing that way when you were younger wouldn’t have had an also disappointing effect. Best not to dwell on it and wear whatever you want now. You can still incorporate trends without looking ridiculous, though I get that it’s not totally comfortable at the moment. That might change the more you experiment. Just do it, nonnie! Think about it. If you don’t start then when you’re in your 40s or 50s, will you be wishing you grew balls now? Probably!

No. 350825

I work all day most days and the fun is all gone.

No. 350845

I used to feel the same during depressive episodes. Now that I'm doing better, I realize that I did lean into that "hotness", but it didn't make me look hot so I just wrote it off and forgot about it. I looked awkward because I was, no amount of sexy and feminine clothing would've made me attractive because I didn't yet know what works for me and I looked frumpy or trashy depending on the outfit.
I think you're overestimating how many looks you could've pulled off, no offense. You probably don't look very different from your younger self and your proportions probably haven't changed much. Odds are you just don't suit things that you find hot on other women - which is fine, you just need to find what suits you. Those things don't change a great deal throughout your life, you just have to "update" them a bit.

No. 350938

This might be the wrong place for this, but what do you nonnies recommend for looking young, like health tips, skincare, routine, style etc.? I’m not trying to look like a mom when I’m in my 30s. Don’t even want kids. Just want to extend my 20s another decade and have fun lol

No. 350940

And I mean beyond Botox or whatever despite me considering it. Just general tips for not looking like,
old to younger people

No. 350941

I think moms look hot so can't help you.

No. 350942

No. 350945

You sound exactly like me. I really haven't cared up until now, but I just turned 30 and feel like I'm missing out.

No. 350951

Not bait, I’m actually seeking some appearance related guidance

No. 350953

Retinol or tretinoin if your skin can handle it. Wear suncreen everyday and reapply throughout the day. I like supergoop's line, but ymmv. Drink lots of water and limit alcohol and smoking. Eat loads of fruit and veggies. Exercise most days of the week (cardio and strength training). I wouldn't touch botox or any other plastic surgery yet. Imo it actually ages people in their 30s more than a few wrinkles. With a solid ret or tret routine, you'll definitely have less anyways.

No. 350955

this advice is fine but just remember if you use retinol that you have to protect your skin from the elements or it will do more harm than good.
all the generic "eat good food most of the time, drink water, get good sleep, stay active" goes a long way as you age. limiting alcohol to rare occasions will help a lot too. as for procedures I would try microneedling before botox.

No. 350958

Why do you care about what younger people think of you based on your appearance

No. 350959

Because I remember being 18-21 and believing women in their 30s were ancient, lacked style and looked out of the loop in terms of fashion, beauty, and generally felt like they looked worse due to age. I don’t want to be perceived that way, my inner 20 year old is still strong and wants to be pretty and fresh idk

No. 350960

I use retinol 3-4x a week, I’m a night shifter and have been for 6 years so it’s rare that I see daylight or sun. I apply sunscreen when I go to work for the couple of hours the sun is still up. By sunrise I just need to drive home. Do I need to worry about that drive home, or is the living in darkness thing enough to do tret and not reapply sunscreen? I feel like in general, living exclusively at night for so many years is why I don’t have lines or signs of aging yet. I’ve had (passive aggressive) women my age tell me I “only look so young because I’m never in the sun”

On my days off, though, I tend to be awake during some sunlight hours. There are tons of windows in my home but not much direct sunlight. Should I be applying and re-applying while I’m indoors during daytime hours? Genuine question. When I go on vacations/am forced to be on a day schedule I do apply sunscreen religiously. Which is a chore because my family and friends make fun of me for even caring about sunscreen. But they are severely sun damaged so I don’t really care what they say.

I honestly have a huge fear of sunlight. Hence the night life.

No. 350961

Yep, that's why I mentioned sunscreen, too. But it's good to emphasize that it's required if you use any retinol or higher. SPF is a must even without any other skincare.

No. 350964

I still apply SPF even if I'm indoors all day. It's just a part of my morning routine at this point. But I might not be as meticulous with re-application. Since UV is low at sunrise, I wouldn't stress too much about it especially if your drive is short (less than 15 mins). It certainly wouldn't hurt to reapply, though.

No. 350965

Let's be honest a youthful appearance is mostly due to genetics, I don't do anything skincare wise and people think I'm in my early 20s despite being 30.

No. 350966

That’s very sad and I hope you stop caring as you age then because sooner or later your skin will look like theirs, eventually, no matter what. I wish 20 year olds would stop judging 30 year olds like you did but also 30 something year olds shouldn’t give a fuck what 20 year olds think so.

No. 350969

Also clothes and hairstyle and overall demeanor, I know I sure as hell don’t look 24 at 30 but I tend to dress “too young” and have a dumb hairstyle. Shave everyone’s heads and line them up naked and the true age to perceived age gap shrinks.

No. 350973

That's mental. At 18 I thought women in their 30s were boss babes like Carrie Bradshaw. Anyway you won't be pretty and fresh if you aren't already so I wouldn't worry.

No. 350977

You're fine, sounds like you have it covered. Not good to stress so much about it. Make sure you get some direct sun sometimes on your body, you need that.
Take care of yourself as a night-shift worker, that's a whole bag of worms too in regards to health and longevity.

No. 351003

Maybe I should have been more specific - I’d like to STAY pretty and fresh. People think I’m 20-23 plus I get lots of positive attention from looking the way I do, and I’m not trying to let that change anytime soon. I prefer never revealing my age because my body and face do not match the number. In a good way.

No. 351004

Then why worry? But as >>350966 said, you will eventually look that way, as will everyone. Your posts give off the vibe of someone who's very, very insecure about their age so I hope you change your mindset of all 30-somethings being ugly, haggard moms soon. Especially since it doesn't make any sense, seeing as you're pushing 30 yourself.

No. 351006

I think the 30+ women who maintain a low weight, exercise, don’t have kids and take care of their hair + skin, avoid alcohol etc. can stay sexy and youthful well into their 40s. That’s what I’m going for. I want to avoid the haggard, tired, pudgy and unkept/lack of style or energy look that a lot of women seem to acquire once they get into their 30s. I knew a woman at work in her late 40s and she looked geriatric, it was absolutely depressing to see. She obviously didn’t take care of herself, and was overweight, grey haired and full on grandma vibes. I was just looking for good health/skin/workout regimen tips to avoid ending up a grandma after my 30s, and I wouldn’t mind continuing to look nearly a decade younger throughout my 30s. I’ll accept looking older when I am older - as in 50+. Before that age I think you create your appearance through lifestyle choices. Genetics help, but women who end up looking older in their 30s-40s just didn’t care for themselves enough. That’s what I’m getting at. And I’m not feeling that “lack of energy, not wanting to vibe or go out late, hurt back always sore” shit 30+ people moan about. I feel exactly the same physically as I did at 18, I don’t feel tired or older and I don’t want to eventually look it either. At least not for another two decades.

No. 351008

So you seem to know what you need to do, and are doing it already. What other purpose is there in posting in a thread of women over or nearing 30, and saying you think older women are frumpy, gross moms? You are also not saging and have the typing style of someone looking to pick a fight. Either you're trolling or just not very well mentally.
>Zoomer ageism is peak stupidity and we won’t have it here.

No. 351011

you don't have to sage on /g/ unless for some reason you feel your post does not merit bumping the thread. since she's asking the same thing a bunch of times I do kinda wish she would sage some of these but she really doesn't have to.

No. 351013

You're thinking about this way too hard and being way too judgemental. You got some answers, there's not a secret potion. For more detailed beauty regimens and advice you should try the skincare thread or perhaps the diet/fitness/health thread.

No. 351021

I don't know if it's because I've felt like a 40-60+ year old trapped in the body of a young person since I was 14 or what, but I don't think aging means you aren't "fresh". A comedian where I'm from said "I like growing old, it lasts longer" and I absolutely subscribe to that.
The temporary state of "being young and fresh" and the vain pursuit of being that the rest of one's existence makes me wonder what or whom it's for, since nobody will remember any of that once you're gone.

It's not something honorable, charitable even to be known for posthumously, to have been chasing youth just to feel contentment, happiness, self fulfillment. The show Nip Tuck does a good job at summarizing what I mean.

Sure, everyone decides what they want in life in the end but the endless chase for the proverbial non existent youth fountain is a very lonely and selfish way of tackling life.

No. 351050

This… helped me and I’m very insecure and vain about aging. I’m constantly chasing that idea of youth, but you’re a beautiful writer and this genuinely moved me. I wish you’d post more. You’re an absolute light in my darkness. I’m going to save this. Thank you anon.

No. 351052

I’m just not well mentally. I’m sorry. Not looking for a fight, I’m just constantly panicking now that 30 is around the corner. Being perceived as younger than my actual age for a long time has not helped my mindset. If I’m being honest - I had planned on killing myself between 27-29 just to avoid this internal conflict and mental anguish surrounding aging. I’ve been mentally ill for a very long time. I did not get a chance to appreciate or enjoy my youth beyond liking my reflection and the positive attention. I honestly do not wish to live much longer. I might end up in a psych ward or dead by 30. I’m grasping at straws and trying to at least stay beautiful - I’ve had that throughout all of my suffering. It’s the only good thing I associate with myself and my life. Beauty, youth and potential

No. 351067

Thanks nonna. I don't always contribute to this thread, just every so often because I feel like the odd one out for never having had any fears or concerns about aging.
I have been through deep depression from age 14 to age 26, from external factors I could not change (family issues) as well as the ones I could influence up until I removed myself from the people in my life that made me not to continue on living.

And every year I still pass my birthday I'm surprised I'm still here because I expect to die due to my own clumsiness or finally an accident or natural catastrophe to finally get me.
I avoided an earthquake in Turkey in the 90s by traveling back home one week before it, I avoided the terror attacks in Paris in November 2015 by being just one neighborhood away from it all and not noticing anything until I got home and watched the news, I avoided being trapped in a Parisian underground "subway" tunnel by one day. And all that might just be coincidental but because it feels like whatever will flatline me can happen at any second, I'd just not worry about whether I look young or old when I'm dead.

I've been angry enough about things in the past -I make just one exception to complain about the railway system because they always screw me over kek- , I'd rather focus on things I can influence, have meaningful discussions, being congruent and truthful yet not harsh to people I interact with and make the most of whatever time I'll get.

No. 351093

I don't really understand wanting to look young in your 30s, unless you don't work and have no real career ambitions, I guess. I literally have age-appropriate wrinkles but I have babyface so people always think I'm in my early 20s… but I feel like they must think I'm an alcoholic or smoker or something. I work in science research and coworkers from other departments walk right past me to ask for help from one of my male interns. It's embarrassing for everyone. When I present at conferences, people often assume I'm an undergraduate student which fucks me over in networking and I get treated like a teenager applying to her first job in interviews.
I don't act or dress like a young person, and I minimize my femininity to try to appear more serious. I don't even use cute notebooks or pretty jewelry anymore, just boring plain stuff. I feel like I sacrifice so much to be taken seriously and nothing works. It's frustrating and I hate it.

No. 351094

fuck the haters, nona. use your cute notebooks and pretty jewelry. one thing I've learned is you can't perform your way out of the world being misogynistic.

No. 351104

My best friend has the same experience as you nonna, but in the medical field specifically neurology, where she's been working for six years. A lot of patients think she's an intern, or a nurse, and she's had to impose herself a lot for some of those patients to take her seriously.
Even if that meant being slightly upsetting to those patients.

Sending you lots of strength and courage, people misjudge often others, it's not easy.

No. 351108

A dude in his 30s called me "young" (I'm 28) and it felt weird for some reason and it shouldn't feel that way. I was surprised someone, especially a man, considered me young at that age. That's fucked up

No. 351109

I witnessed this in the hospital the other day. A female surgeon came in to talk to a rowdy male patient and he said ‘Youre gorgeous for an anaesthetist’ I heard her later talking to her colleague about how angry she was

No. 351138

you are young but he's not much older unless he was in his late-late 30s I guess. was he trying to put you down?

No. 351144

He was like 34 or 35 and no, it wasn't in a negative context. I think the internet totally ruined my perception because I got so used to men calling women over 25 old or post wall or just not young anymore, that being called young irl still surprises me.

No. 351251

Today is my little sister's first day of university and I couldn't feel more jealous and bitter.
She's 18, skinny, beautiful, just about to start her life and everything seems to go perfectly for her. We both are weebs/kboos and while I studied something I hate but my parents wanted me to, she managed to get accepted for some cool degree which includes studying abroad, basically everything I wanted too back then. I went to a local uni and stayed at my parents house to safe money and never managed to make any friends or get a bf, meanwhile she moved to a dorm and already got to know many fellow students before it even started.
I wish I could be a supportive big sis to her but I'm just a total mess.

It dawned on me that I will work this same shit job for another 40 years, and then I will be an old lonely lady with endless regrets.
There's just nothing in life that I look forward to anymore. Just a couple months ago I thought I will quit and just study/learn something else but now I suddenly feel way too old and ashamed plus I know that nothing could ever make me happy anyway. I also always told myself that if my depression gets so bad that I can no longer take it, I will just quit everything and "flee" to some place abroad but now I also understand that my problems would follow me too.
I wish the internet didn't exist, that I never got into anything asian and started hating my own country, that I didn't dream of becoming famous, that I didn't know what incels, the wall, freezing eggs and all that shit is. I know I shouldn't come here anymore but I'm just too lonely not to.

No. 351253

I 100% know what it feels like to feel resentment over other people experiencing a "normal" life so easily and smoothly, nothing standing in their way, but you're only ruining your life by feeling that resentment. The years won't come back but you can improve the years still to come. It's not too late to change fields or go back to school. I went back at 25, daunting yes and sometimes uncomfortable but I'm there for me and no one else. You too are entitled to education. There's other means to change fields without going back to school too, but you need to take initiative and actively go after it. You're only stuck in that job for the next 40 years if you think you are!

No. 351254

File: 1696445098952.gif (141.53 KB, 480x270, giphy.gif)

The sad truth is that even normal not internet-brained young people think of 30 as old. I remember being a freshman in university, and I thought a 24yo fellow student wasn't interested in being friends because of our age gap…
I feel like if I was a moid all my problems wouldn't exist. Part of why aging as a woman is so scary is because after 30 you're being pushed into being a mommy, both in looks and character while moids just stay themselves all their lifes.
I guess my country is extreme when it comes to this but I just hate that people expect you to dress a certain way, talk a certain way, have your life revolve around spoiled kids, spend all your freetime in playgrounds, call your own mom grandma, fight with teachers, cook lunchboxes and switch to an uber healthy lifestyle because everything is super poisonous for your baby…english is obviously not my native language, hopefully you get what I mean? i just hate everything about it. Sadly I also don't know any young moms who are an exception to this and I also don't know any happy older childless women. Feels like you're doomed.

No. 351261

You are romanticizing the average college experience that in the larger scale of things means nothing much. How many people peaked in college are now depressed, unemployed slobs? Your sister doesn't have her life figured out, she is 18. You sound depressed, definitely try to address that.

No. 351273

Since a lot of posts in this thread are about having trouble finding partners at 30+, here's some encouragement for you:
I'm 35, my friends group ranges from 33 to 35, and all of my friends save for me got married between 29 and 34. I'm the only single one left and it's mostly by choice: I just don't go out apart from girls nights with these women, and these nights are usually at someone's home, not public venues where I could be meeting men.
If you're looking for advice based on these womens' experiences I'd say the Tinder thing could work if you were really consistent about it. Two of them met their guys on Tinder and the guys aren't LVMs: both are successful and seem to treat them well.. I asked them how you use Tinder to find an actual guy who proposes and they said just pay attention to the profiles that give off an air of professionalism (suits, good English) and put them to the top of your list of guys to interact with.

No. 351280

Kill yourself(a-logging)

No. 351338

I don't know where y'all live but I'm glad I don't live there. I've never been expected to be anything just because I'm in my 30s. My family is full of childless women and having kids into your late 30s isn't a big deal, even though this is a conservative country.
Only rich Russian women sound like that where I am from. To them, if you're 25+ and not married to a rich man, popping out babies or flexing on your instagram followers, why are you alive? I guess it just sounds depressing to me that women go through all that education just to be valued for what, being hot and being a mommy, those two things only? Bleak.

No. 351345

Tbf I'd have had that pressure too if I had still contact with my father's side of the family, they pretend to be modern etc since they're in Yurop since the 60s, but at heart the family is raised by traditional Muslims.
My parents didn't raise me with any religion so I'm not about that life.
My Mom was forced to go through an arranged marriage (to continue the family name lineage more than anything), and she's told me herself that she doesn't expect any grandchildren from me.
I was surprised the first few times in the EU country I moved to that some of the discussions only turned around women my age having children, or the want to have children or not, as if it's the only purpose in life.
Thank God the people who asked me the first few years I was here I don't really talk to now, but I remember thinking "What the fuck makes any of my life choices your goddamn business?" in the back of my head.

No. 351347

>Some of the discussions only turned around women my age having children, or the want to have children or not, as if it's the only purpose in life
I mean no offense to anyone with kids or who wants kids, but busybodies who care so much about babies and who is having them or when have nothing going on in their lives. It's a way to fix past mistakes, start over and get their kids to entertain them or make them a good person which they were too dumb to become on their own.
I'm just glad my family is rich and educated so I don't have to shack up with some subpar man to make ends meet and get guilted into kids.

No. 351368

Stop projecting.

No. 351399

Thanks for the nice words nonnie but there simply is a world of difference between going to uni at 25 and quitting plus starting anew in your late 20s or even 30s. When it comes to this every single year counts, if you managed to start at 25 you likely even finish before 30, meaning you're still good.

I'm so desperate to find an out since years already that whenever I meet somebody, go somewhere, watch something I get curious about whatever job I encounter and immediately think that this might be a better option for me.
But the truth is that my dream jobs only exist in my fantasy and are unreachable. I try to find a normal realistic option but there's just nothing out where for me.
I also often think back to my uni days when I worked in a local bakery. It was exhausting, I was completely alone during my shift, had to sell, bake and clean everything on my own, yet I miss it. Some customers are shit, but most regulars were nice lower income workers like truckdrivers or retirees who treated me so s
kindly. Working something like that is so mentally relaxing compared to academia and my current job. But the pay is way too little to survive. I really don't know what to do.

I know that I'm depressed, doesn't change anything tho.
I simply grew up in a sheltered area, here there really hardly are any people who aren't normie, meaning everybody I know had a nice time at college and continued living well afterwards. Those outliers like me who failed were already noticable before starting work or university. I was already weird and doomed at 18 vs my little sis who does most things right and has most things work out nicely for her.

No. 351413

>I know that I'm depressed, doesn't change anything tho.

Sure it does, depression gets you acting like a doomer instead of finding solutions to your problems. I'm not trying to belittle you, I understand how it feels to believe there is something fundamentally broken in you because life seems so easy for other people except for you, but truly, it doesn't have to be that way. Both because you can do better for yourself with what you have, and because everyone out there, even normies, have something keeping them up at night with worry and unhappiness, that's just being a person.

No. 351414

Yes, yes it does make a difference. Depression literally changes your brain chemistry. Claiming having depression makes no difference makes as much sense as claiming baving a broken leg makes no difference in your ability to run a marathon.

Stop talking down on yourself.

No. 351433

Every time someone mistakes me for younger it kind of shocks me how people really don't know how 30+ women generally look. I get it from people who are 50+, but being told "you look so young, though!" always made me want to respond "I am?"

No. 351449

>"you look so young, though!" always made me want to respond "I am?"
lol right?? I think a lot of the 'omg I thought you were only like 25!' directed at 30+ women is less that they look 25 (or that there is any meaningful difference between how a 25 and 30 yr old look), and more that if someone looks young, they must be a 'young' age aka under 30. It's like, if a 30 year old looks young it's because they ARE young. If they look old, they are aging prematurely for whatever reason.

No. 351510

I have been discussing this with friends lately, I think people are younger for longer (unless unhealthy) these days. I used to help out at a care home as a kid and residents were around 60/70 and looked so much older than the 60/70 year olds I work with now

No. 351558

It definitely helps that more and more people are using sunscreen. I also feel like the media hasn't helped people's perceptions of how a 30 year old should look. Often 30 years olds will be casted to play teenagers. And this makes people believe that it what a teenager looks like. Then when they see someone in their 30s they go "Oh you look like a teenager!" Because that is what they are used to.

No. 352483

Good god, you reminded me of my years as a high schooler/early student years living at my parents' house, my younger siblings would watch Hannah Montana (when they weren't binging on High School Musical, Desperate Housewives or Gossip Girl) and one day we learned with my sisters that the guy that plays the brother in the show is way over 30 and we were absolutely shocked kek.

No. 353111

>An even average looking man can easily get dates and sex with women through doing this. The manosphere is full of success stories of average men who went from frustrated, friendzoned chumps to total players with a few months to a year of improving himself. Myself included. I readily admit that The Red Pill changed my life. I went from a skinny fat incel who struck out with women, to juggling 3- 4 dates a week with attractive women. In the last 6 months, I dated a 23 year old student at a local university, and a 40 year old art professor at the same school! And I did it in my mid- 30s. At 37, I am having more success with women than I ever have in my life. I’ve written a lot about it here.
>Critics can call the manosphere and The Red Pill “misogynist”, but the things I learned there worked for me and for thousands, if not millions, of other men over the years. Women do not have the same agency, or the same amount of time. A woman’s value (in the dating market, not as a human being and a child of God) is in her physical beauty, femininity, and youth. A more plain woman can improve her lot in life with make up, hair, and clothing. However, the standards of female beauty are a lot higher and more attached to her body than men. An average looking woman will gain some (but not as much) of an edge by getting fit. Once she is past 30, her options, among the attractive, successful men that women like, start shrinking dramatically, no matter what she does.
I know I shouldn't be reading stuff like this but I constantly feel like it's the truth. I'm 28 and I never dated anyone, I never "put myself out there", I never had any social circles and I spent most of my life at home, I had no contant with men throughout most of my life so I don't know if some decent men would be attracted to me or not, because I didn't even create any opportunity for it. Also I never expected to live that long so I was not prepared for it. Now I feel like I'm suddenly about to hit 30 and I basically have no people in my life. I feel everyone is already in a relationship and only creepy men are single at 30. I feel like I missed my entire youth and my one and only opportunity to find someone nice. I will always blame myself for being a mentally ill NEET who spent most of her teens and 20s in her room.

No. 353116

Don’t read this shit. Men will fuck anything. He contradicted himself - dated a woman in her 20s then a woman in her late 30s. If he really felt that women lose value over 30, why was he interested in the older one? And this reads like an absolute basement dweller larp

From my experience, and what I’ve seen - younger men are becoming more and more attracted to and into dating older versus younger. I’ve personally known plenty of decent men that had happy relationships with women much older than them.

Men age like milk. This is how they cope. The man who wrote this is most likely trying to cope with the fact that he went bald at 25 or something.

Also keep in mind, men have no idea what women in their 30s actually look like. Plenty of gorgeous Hollywood women that are highly lusted after by men of all ages are in their 30s-40s. Men watch “teen” porn without realizing the actresses are actually closer to 30.

This stuff is really horrible to stumble upon. I used to let it effect me, too. But it doesn’t reflect most men. Imagine feeling so insecure about being an incel, finally getting a few dates, and then sitting down to flex about the fact that two women finally looked at you. This guy is most likely undatable and feels the need to flex to his incel bros about the few times he almost got laid.

No. 353119

Also nonnie, I stumbled upon a really wholesome Reddit thread about a year ago. It was someone asking men if they really prefer younger woman.

The vast majority of men in that conversation said they prefer someone in their age range. They expressed that younger woman are cute to look at, but annoying and immature when it comes to dating them. Some of the men even said they look like children, and they prefer mature women. There were quite a few men that said they were dating and/or married to an older woman, and that they find older women sexier than a 20 year old.

Then men who said they prefer younger women were far outnumbered, with no upvotes, and there were maybe 3-5 out of 150 men that even had that response to the question.

Being a long term incel results in posts like the one you read. But when it comes down to it, even a youth obsessed incel will fuck literally anything with a vagina

No. 353120

>child of God
why are these fucking incels pretending to be christians? it's unbearable

No. 353121

File: 1697387272185.jpeg (751.49 KB, 1946x3000, IMG_9217.jpeg)

I know they divorced, but Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Married for six years. He was 25 when they got together, she was 40. I could post more examples, and even share some screenshots of men talking about preferring women their age or older, but I think you get the point

Women will always have power over men regardless of age. And that makes some men absolutely seethe, especially if they can’t get laid

No. 353122

Ok, let's say you fling yourself at the nearest balding unemployed scrote who needs a live-in maid. What next? You've got someone in your life, is it worth it? Do you enjoy the rewards of your retardation? Of course not. But the scrote in this situation would lose out if he didn't have a slave. That's why men write this drivel. They rely on inexperienced, easily influenced retards to give them easy pussy and hot meals and clean homes.
Please, please leave the house and interact with the real world before you dig yourself into more shit than you bargained for. Men are attracted to anyone and anything, but they still degrade and cheat on literal top models, looks and age have nothing to do with it. Work on your self-confidence first, see any moid who hates women over 30 as a dodged bullet, and live your life for yourself, not desperately trying to meet some basement-dwelling mouthbreather's standards. Sorry if I sound harsh, I genuinely wish you all the best, and women in your situation are easy prey for failed abortions, you really need to know your own worth before you even think about dating.

No. 353123

They probably consider even one outing as "having dated" lmao. You have to be a total retard to believe a man can easily date those women. Yeah maybe she fucked some low self esteem fat 20 year old girl by buying her some gifts but that doesn't mean any 20 year old girls would ever fuck expired men.

No. 353148

How does one know their own worth

No. 353154


No. 353164

80 year old ladies without money find 20 year old men to date, dont worry about it. The wall is a cope made by men, old men are the ones who are alone, not old women.

No. 353171

I mean it's not hard to find people to date and fuck, especially men. But not everyone cares about hook ups, some people want someone for a committed relationship and finding a good man for that is hard and I feel like it gest harder with age, because all decent men get scooped in their 20s and what's left in the 30+ group is usually men who for some reasons couldn't get a woman or didn't want to commit and they're defective in some ways

No. 353174

he treated her like shit and left her for someone younger, so not a good example. but also, I don't think you would necessarily want to trust a man 15 years younger than you to commit in any meaningful way anyway.

No. 353186

Tbh snatching up a good man in your 20s is down to luck. It's impossible to know at that age what a man is going to turn out like. If I wanted a committed relationship at my age I would probably narrow down my search to widowers. You want a tested and proven product.

No. 353187

He also got with mila kunis when she was 14 and made creepy remarks about other teenage actresses

No. 353193

He cheated on her with a 22 year old her met at a bowling alley. Maybe a better example would be ATJ and his much older wife? There are rumors he cheated but I’m pretty sure it’s wishful thinking since nobody on earth likes seeing them together kek. I think he’s loyal and just an odd duck who actually likes older women

No. 353241

All my male cousins started dating 30 year old women when they were in their 20's and are now married with kid, dont worry about it. A woman has value at any age, a man doesnt.

No. 353251

Oooff I had no idea. Thank you for that info. What an absolute failure of a moid.

No. 353252

He goes to Asian brothels too

No. 353257

lmao I had the same thought. If I'd look for a man now at my age (mid 30's), I would either go for a widower or for someone who came out of a longterm relationship (but I'd have to verify that the man is not completely at fault for the failure of the past relationship, so this means widower would be the better option but those are rare in my age range)

No. 353258

Write out a list of qualities you like about yourself. Everything you can think of.
Reread it everyday until you view yourself better

No. 353259

Even better - exude fake confidence until tho actually feel confident. Imagine yourself as being the sexiest piece of ass in the room everywhere you go. Fake it till you make it, and in the end everyone will perceive you based on the energy you give out

No. 353296

Based. Men age horribly. And they cope with that by projecting their own insecurities onto women. Especially if they’re unsuccessful, balding or short.

Off topic, but has anyone been watching the Golden Bachelor? It’s actually quite wholesome. The bachelor himself is only interested in women that are in their 60s-70s. The women are all so confident and comfortable with themselves, emotionally mature, and beautiful. It’s truly refreshing to see. Men and women don’t lose interest in dating after a certain age.

I’ve also worked at nursing homes where groups of men will all be lusting over cute elderly woman. I’ve seen them take each other on little dates, leave love letters at each other’s doors, I even saw an elderly couple at my nursing home decide to get married. They were both in their 80s.

No. 353302

Yeah actually! Never watched any of the regular bachelor/bachelorette but my curiosity was too piqued by the GB kek. It is genuinely refreshing, and the women are so beautiful and confident and it’s just. Idk it’s a nice change of pace from dating show schlock even if it is still reality TV

No. 353306

Nta but fake it till you make it unironically helped me for a lot of things.

No. 353308

Ntayrt but whenever I did that people could tell I was faking it and ended up disliking me as a result. Maybe I was doing something wrong idk.

No. 353518

I don't care because I still look 19 and nobody suspects I'm older than 21. I will report in when I start looking older and the quarter life crisis will surely kick in

No. 353521

Bumped for a humblebrag that’s likely not even accurate because you felt the need to post about it as a form of self affirmation

You look your age.

No. 353531

idk, people constantly assume I'm 8-9 years younger than my actual age, when I was 23-24 they assumed I'm in middle school etc., I just have a very neotenous face. That's why I think I will become paranoid when I start looking older, for now it's nice so I try to preserve my youthful look, diet, face yoga, moisturizing, no make up etc.

No. 353536

You sound like my mom. She was literally a grandma before she actually started to age visibly. Actually I’ve never asked her how she felt about that, she usually just laughs off questions like that though. (I think there’s some freaky longevity genes on that side of the family, her grandma lived to 106 — hope my mom lives that long haha.) Lucky you! Have there been any perks? (Aside from not having to be stressed about the visual appearance of aging.) Or does your appearance really not affect your image of how your life is going and what you spent your time on?

No. 353539

>her grandma lived to 106
Damn. Was she also healthy? Living that long sounds kinda scary, unless you don't have any debilitating conditions
>Have there been any perks?
People don't take me seriously and they question my competence and my knowledge. Men my age don't hit on me…

No. 353541

Yeah she was healthy, just got old and passed in her sleep, always lived at home (one of her daughters lived with her and helped her with stuff a lot though). Lived off her dead husbands pension for like the last 50 years of her life and enjoyed her hobbies and grandkids.
Bummer you’re experiencing the downsides to looking young. Maybe you can subtly or not-so-subtly bring up your age more often (kind of a silly idea but you never know) or get a WFH job where people don’t see you in person so they can’t judge.

No. 353543

if anon doesn't like looking young then what's with >>353531
>for now it's nice so I try to preserve my youthful look, diet, face yoga, moisturizing, no make up etc.

No. 353544

I have this problem too. People always think I'm 3 years old. They keep asking me "where's your mommy, sweetie? Where did your mommy go?" when I'm in line for coffee and it's seriously impeding my life.

No. 353547

So you look 19 but you’re actually a whopping…over 21. Are you a vampire or something? You’re like, not aging at all!

No. 353571

I didn't say I don't like it
I'm 29

No. 353580

>I'm 29
Stop shitting up our thread, child. The insecure zoomer thread is somewhere else.

No. 353581

Nta but did you read the thread title. 29 is nearing 30.

No. 353583

You have the mental age of a tweenager and you're really annoying. Go away.

No. 353584

Like I said that wasn't me.

No. 353593

I’m the OP of this thread and 29 is definitely old enough to be here. That’s why I said “nearing 30 & over 30”. I’m 28. Is that zoomer age too?

No. 353594

>her grandma lived to 106

My grandma is 98 and her sister died at almost 101. And no one believes my age nor my mothers or siblings.

I feel like Highlander.

No. 353596

I have a similar family. My bio dad (estranged) is near 50 and looks late 20s. My mother is also near 50 and looks late 30s.

My bio grandparents and greats are all aging like wine and living up to 100.

My brother does not have the same exact genetics as me, and has my non-bio dad’s genetics. People assume he’s mid 30s. He’s 5 years younger than me. People tend to think I’m his little sister and that I’m starting college this year. I’m 28.

In terms of aging I have great genetics and haven’t aged at all since 19/20, but one downside is my bio family is batshit insane and I inherited a lot of mental health issues

No. 353599

>My bio dad (estranged) is near 50 and looks late 20s
bullshit men don't age that well kek

No. 353603

He has aged that well. It’s really weird and it sort of bothers me. He’s also immature, like emotionally stunted so he both looks and acts like he’s in his late 20s. It bothers me quite a bit. The only thing “aged” about him is that he has some gray hairs, but it’s mostly brown and he’s got a full head of hair. No balding yet

He has a lot of Native American blood, like 50-60%, that could be why? He also works out nonstop. Anyways it’s legit. But I do agree, most men age like milk

No. 353607

My dad's like this, too, and the "no balding", thing, too. He's in his 60's and looks like he's in his 40's. Except the man won't wear fucking sunscreen! Anyway, his family's side has those weird genes where everyone looks like a kid in their 20's.

No. 353942

I'm turning 30 this month and I am not too sure how to feel about it
In the past I used to dread it so much because I thought it meant I have to have kids by now and give up on my hobbies
I made a promise to myself that I would start taking care of myself more now that I am more financially stable and feel worthy of it
I am also trying heal my fucked up self esteem because my mom was very conservative and I had only 3 older brothers
You can imagine the fucked up shit I was fed growing into a teenager. Don't wear this, boys will look at you. Pull your shirt down, your skin is showing. Your body is too sexy to wear clothes like that girl
I am a grown woman now and I can do whatever I want so I am going to try and feel more comfortable in the clothes I do want to wear and feel confident in

No. 353963

No wonder you're so worked up about turning 30. Just do self care, don't attach any strings to it, or you'll reach a point where you don't feel worthy and let your life go to shit. If you can't afford to spend much, go for a walk, do some yoga, work on your hobbies. If you have some money to spare, don't feel bad about spending it on yourself. Please don't have kids until you've worked on your self esteem enough to figure out if you actually want them or not. Turning 30 isn't the huge deal everyone makes it out to be. You won't wake up wrinkled and shunned by society while young women and rich men throw empty egg cartons at you and laugh while you weep. I don't know what your relationship is like with your family but it might be a good idea to go no contact for a while, misogynistic boymoms and the family annihilators they raise aren't good company.

No. 358405

File: 1699819642002.jpg (143.9 KB, 1213x1500, Julie-Newmar-batman-4ca3819882…)

Bumping this thread to say I only just discovered Julie Newmar was 33/34 when she played Catwoman - an absolute stunning icon, ladies you do not hit the wall in your 30s…

No. 358411

Hitting the wall is a mysoginistic incel concept I don't subscribe to and I also don't think desperately trying to stay beautiful and youthful looking as long as possible is the best thing you can do for yourself either. Never mind the fact that the aging proces of a Hollywood actress probably isn't reflective of the average woman who doesn't have access to the same resources. Kinda sad this thread keeps coming back to beauty. Why not worry about your career or making other fulfilling life goals/activities happen as you enter or are in your 30s. If any woman in her 30s is going to be an icon it should be for something other than her looks, you'd think you all would be wiser by this age ffs.

No. 358458

The wall is fake we gotta move past that in this thread. I get the insecurity angle but the wall rhetoric is getting to be a lot and tainting the thread.

No. 358475

Because this thread is full of men.

No. 358476

>sexiest piece of ass
Ugh. Gross scrotespeak.

Theres literally studies that show men age biologically faster than women do. Not to mention men die younger too.

No. 358478

Kek, redpill rhetoric is absolute copium bollocks.
Men absolutely do not ‘suddenly start slaying pussy’ just after taking a shower and getting a haircut. Even incels know this advice is a crock of shit kek.

The only time I’ve seen loser moids suddenly succeed in pulling women is when they fly to South East Asia and literally have to pay impoverished third world women to tolerate spending time with them. That counts as ‘slaying’ to moids and they’ll happily brag about the fact that they’re so naturally repulsive to women they had to fly halfway across the world and engage in paid rape in order to make sexual contact with a female, with zero self awareness about their own repulsivity whatsoever.

No. 358491

the sad part is that there's literally American college girls willing to sleep with a man because he paid for dinner. but instead of even trying they just listen to whatever podcasters say and assume its reality

No. 358506

Feeling triggered by a moid, which is absolutely ludicrous considering how unintelligent they are and how they have a higher self esteem than women simply because they lack self awareness

I was talking to a very obviously older guy at work today. Hair graying, grotesque body and deep set lines in his face. Of course he asked me my age (why do they always feel the need to do this?). I told him I’m 28, and he acted shocked and said “oh wow, you’re younger than me?!”. When it’s very obvious that he’s older than I am. Why do they do this? It’s like he was implying he thought I was much older than his ragged ass self, which is nonsensical seeing as he’s aged like milk whereas I still get mistaken for early 20s by the majority of people I interact with

Do men who act this way have no self-awareness in regards to their appearance and the fact that they are aging like milk. I know I shouldn’t be triggered but I am. Why would he imply I look older than him?

No. 358507

Don’t worry about it. He was leaving part unsaid, he was likely implying “but were so compatible / I could see us together I didn’t even realize you’re obviously younger than me lol

No. 358522

Turned 31 this year and I feel like I've been able to flourish and find myself compared to my 20s and teen years which were full of mental illness and emotional instability, not to mention being broke af. I can afford therapy on my own which has helped me learn to speak up for myself and that has been so empowering. My biggest regret is chasing emotionally unavailable moids in my 20s/teens. I cringe at how many years I spent chasing moids that did not give a fuck if I was alive or not. So many wasted nights crying over the fact that they ghosted me, didnt text back, etc. I was a total pick me and I wish I would have had some guidance back then to avoid all that pain. One downside of entering my 30s is I developed some serious death anxiety once I became more aware of my and my loved one's mortality. I never had plane anxiety but I can't go on planes often anymore. I also worry a lot about people thinking they died or something.
Also, zoomers have zero concept of what age looks like. The zoomer colleagues are always like "OMG you're 30?? whaaat" as if they expect 30 year olds to look decrepit. I think I tend to look my age, not too different from 26-ish but with a more refined sense of style. I have some lines around my eyes when I smile (I don't like those esp when I wear concealer) and faint laugh lines which I'm trying to embrace bc I think they look kind of cute.

No. 358542

Everything about this post made me laugh.

No. 358573

Please help me get this idea out of my head that i cannot dress cute now that I am 30! When I was 7 I crawled into the bed of my mother and she said: oh god you are getting big in a concerned voice and ever since I feel like I’m a giant and not cute. And now I want to start dressing like I always wanted to but now I am 30 and I feel like it’s too late!

No. 358613

I had a similar experience with a fat obese grotesque 60 something moid. He asked ‘so how old are you, 35?’ When I’m only 27. He was trying to neg me. Ugly fat fucks always do this. I know it’s not true because I’ve had literally multiple women and men think I’m a teenager.

No. 358622

I see at least one comment a day from some retarded moid about women expiring after 30. It doesnt matter what the platform or video is. Those comments are always present wherever some unwanted, fat, balding, greasy moid feels like sharing them. Im tired of hearing this shit while simultaneously seeing the concept of wanting an "older 35+ provider man" being sold to 18-20 yr old women online.
Im making it my personal goal to only fuck moids under 30 now. Im going to do my best and live every moid's pathetic dream and be an old fuck that goes after people in their "prime". Because anyone with eyes can see its really men that expire after 25.

No. 358646

I'm gonna be 29 in 3 months and I'm getting paranoid. Suddenly I care for what people think and I hate it. I hate the fact people will judge me after finding out I'm a kissless virgin and I'm single and thinking that it's because maybe nobody ever wanted me, which isn't true. It just so happened I was fully aware of my hatred for men since I was like 16 and I never ever wanted to date men (despite not being a lesbian), I hated when men looked at me etc. Tbh I also think I had delayed social development in many areas because of my autism, I only started wanting to have friends and maybe also try dating when I was like 26. But then it got to me that I simply don't have the social skills to bond with anyone, be it platonically or romantically. I still can't see myself sharing my private space with a man though. I can't see myself doing one night stands either. Since I was never close to any male in my life, men seem so alien-like to me. I don't know if there's even a point in trying to date someone "out of curiosity". I'm only scared of people's judgement. I'm also scared it will be harder to make friends with age. Basically everybody in my age range I know is already in a relationship and, of course, they spend most of their free time with their boyfriends and girlfriends. Meanwhile I'm at a mental stage where I would just like to hang out with people, I'm not even talking about partying because I was never interested in drinking, taking drugs and going to clubs like some people my age. I'm just interested in doing hobbies together, going to cinemas, museums, cons, some nice restaurants etc. But I don't know anyone my age (besides me) who would have time for it and who would prefer that to spending time with their partner. I feel like I literally don't belong anywhere and it's getting worse with age since the gap between me and the normies grows drastically. I knew it will be like this even when I was 12 years old, I knew I won't fit in anywhere, but I never expected myself to live to 25

No. 358647

>She also actively speaks out about the objectification of women
And now read everything else you wrote in your post.

No. 358652

I see that alot on Facebook where the dudes look fucking awful Sid from iceage creatures.
Bro I get you're bitter noones touched your cock but goddamn have some self awareness.
I just post their own profile picture on their comment and it tends to get a few laugh reactions.
The audacity is stored in the nutsack.

No. 358660

I understand you, nonna. It's definitely not worth dating a moid just out of fear of judgement from normies. The average moid experience is a traumatizing one. And it's never too late to make friends or improve socially. Know you're not alone in how you feel, and I hope you find some friends you relate to in your area that you can do fun stuff with.

No. 359592

Sorry but she very much looks 34

No. 359594

> I'm just interested in doing hobbies together, going to cinemas, museums, cons, some nice restaurants etc. But I don't know anyone my age (besides me) who would have time for it and who would prefer that to spending time with their partner.
Have you tried asking anyone to hang out? Most people spend time doing normal things like that with their friends even if they have partners. Maybe the partner could come along eventually and you could have two friends.

I'm a volcel for the past 10 years, and I'm scared of being judged but being judged is a small price to pay for living the life I want and am comfortable with. Why should I do something I don't want to do just in case someone idc about has inaccurate negative thoughts about me? It might upset me to know people think less of me, but that upset is not worth making any sacrifices or compromises for. And tbf the judgement is never as harsh as you'd expect based on, say, the internet - literally nobody cares about my chronic lack of a boyfriend, and I'm 32 so older than you. Just go make some friends.

No. 359620

I hate how this thread is either anons posting old women claiming they look 20 as if looking your ags is wrong and males saying the women anons post look even older.
There is no self improvement, none of the older anons are talking about their life experiences, troubles, the good and bad etc. it's just a few body dysmorphic anons obsessed with looking younger.

No. 359624


No. 359661

So what if some anons here have body dysmorphia and/or want to talk about ways to maintain a youthful appearance? It’s not about you, just don’t look at the thread. Let people worry and speculate on whatever they want lol

No. 359715

This post gave me an aneurysm because i thought i wrote it, kek. I can relate to your post that much. I am also a kissless virgin at 27. When i was a teenager, i remember wanting a bf, but the older i get, the less this thought occupies my mind and the more jaded i get at the prospect of dating. Another part of this is because i felt like having a romantic relationship was something unavoidable. I've never met anybody who hasn't dated before, I saw people getting mocked for being virgins and having no dating experiences. I thought i HAD to have a husband and it was going to happen whether i wanted it or not. Now that i realise how wrong this is, I am at the stage where i feel heavily repulsed by the notion of a man wanting chain himself to me for all of eternity. I think i will remain a virgin forever and i don't really care what anyone else thinks. Tbh, i haven't had irl friends since i was a preteen and i'd honestly like to have at least one friend to hang out with once a month, but i don't have the confidence to go about doing this.

No. 359718

You’re right but that’s what people worry about so there’s gonna be a lot of it. It’s retarded but what can you do. Just reply to them if you’re over 30 and tell them how they’re worrying over nothing

No. 359721

For those of you actually 30+ how has your career changed over time? For instance I am someone who didn’t get a high school diploma and never felt bad about it and was able to find work and save money but sometimes I do feel like I missed out on the high school and college experience socially. I did get a GED when I was 24 but never used it. Now I find myself 33 with no diploma and plenty of savings but — don’t come for me — I’m married and not working since COVID started. I did a couple little jobs and volunteering but nothing serious over the last few years, just things I enjoyed. I could have done it without a man too but I probably wouldn’t have. I normally don’t feel any pressure to have a career but maybe I’m weird. I’m very confident I could go back into entry level workforce in a variety of fields that don’t require a degree I just haven’t done it because I don’t have to. Even if I divorced I have years of savings I would not be in trouble financially (this is by design, I’m way too paranoid to actually rely on a man and made sure I had significant savings before I quit working, but the fact is being with him means I spend less money so it’s worth mentioning while talking about finances and work.) But sometimes i think I don’t actually enjoy not working, I like work, all my jobs were interesting and taught me a lot even the stupid grueling ones … can’t tell if I’m retarded for staying home or retarded for wanting to work for a boss. Lmao
What do you think?

No. 359755

We're the same age exactly, and I feel sort of the same except I can't get comfortable enough around people to have friends. I definitely relate to knowing since childhood that I would turn out this way, though. I don't have advice but good luck nonna.

No. 359945

>I hate the fact people will judge me after finding out I'm a kissless virgin
So just lie about that part?

No. 360076

Tbh has anyone else noticed lately that more and more men, especially younger men, are becoming attracted to older woman vs younger? I see this a lot. It’s like it’s becoming more mainstream or commonly agreed upon that women in their 20s esp early 20s tend to look and act like literal children. The only men I hear talking about wanting younger women these days are incels who are aging like milk

No. 360092

Zoomers are generally incredibly insufferable and behave like overgrown toddlers. I don’t know how anyone could date them.

No. 360093

File: 1700480750302.jpeg (227.26 KB, 607x610, IMG_4625.jpeg)

I’m not aging well and it really gets to me. Not to send any other nonas into a tailspin because I think I’m unlucky in this respect but I really started looking old at 31. I’m now 34 and things are not going well. It sucks because I do feel people treat me differently than when I was 25, 27, 28 even. I can no longer feel attractive to anyone. Shitty personality notwithstanding, it does feel over for me. Anyway ymmv. I’m glad at least I did experience some lightning in a bottle things where I made the most of my youth and looks… I just thought I had more time. Inb4 vain bitch…. I know.

No. 360104

It’s not too late nonna, go live out your cute dreams

No. 360110

I don't really care about this since I'm not into people younger than me, I prefer somebody within the 3 year range.

No. 360122

I feel kinda crap because I haven't had a job in two years. But in that time I've had two kids. Husband is happy to have me home caring for them. We bought a house, so now we don't have to pay rent or mortgage so that helps with bills. When youngest is two ish I'll try going back to work. Hard to tell what I genuinely want and what's socially acceptable (my country makes a big deal about women being in the workforce not at home). We have an acre now, maybe I just want to get some sheep and try my hand at traditional food production, which I've always sperged over.

No. 360127

>We have an acre now, maybe I just want to get some sheep and try my hand at traditional food production, which I've always sperged over.
That's 100% what I'd do if I wasn't concerned about being dependent on a man.

No. 360129

He was homeschooled by radfems and generally is pretty much on the same page as me. Not to mention I have my masters in engineering (and live in a welfare state) so it should be alright

No. 360130

Do it, I'd love to be in your position.

No. 360131

Except for the kids part but you know lol

No. 360143

As a 28 year old this post genuinely sent me spiraling into a panic. Not to be so direct, but why do you think this happened? Were there any warning signs, anything you were doing in your 20s that could have accelerated the aging process? Is it facial structure, or body weight or what exactly happened that made you basically look old overnight? Genuinely asking. And can you do anything about it, procedures, lifestyle change, exercise etc?

No. 360144

Did your mother and grandmother age well?

No. 360145

Personally, I started seeing fine lines around my late twenties, and got streaks of grey hair. But I have zero skincare or makeup or anything. I eat healthy and keep in shape, but I look like a full adult now, not "young".

No. 360149

Im actually excited to age.
I have some white shiny hairs and I have wrinkles around my eyes when I smile. My husband says he loves them because it shows I've laughed and smiled alot. The only thing I worry around ageing is pregnancy.
I'm 27 and want a large family, I don't really want to be pregnant for 6 years straight and I feel like we've started trying late for such a big family.

No. 360153

Same. Also creepy moids leave me alone because I'm "past my prime". I can finally just be an invisible matron.

We want a large family too. Husband wants four but I dream of six (it'll probably be four). We had one when I was 26 and another when I was 27. It's nice having them close in age, and I've been happier as a mom than I thought I would be. I was always spergy and weird so I thought I would be shit, but it's completely the opposite. Excited to have more.

If you're okay having kids when you're older, I wouldn't worry too much. But if you can, start trying. It would be good to know if you're someone that gets knocked up easily or if it'll be a big issue.

No. 360158

We're about to start month 3 of trying (period ended today), I'm giving it until March then we will both go get checked for issues.
Fingers crossed this month is the month.
In a perfect world I'd like to have the babies back to back but I know it's not likely. I want at least 4, I will be content with 2.

No. 360160

id give it one year of trying anon. it took us about 6 months of trying to conceive and then i miscarried. got pregnant again a month or two after and i now have a 4 month old! you’re still young for a pregnancy (for reference i’m 31) so i wouldn’t worry!

No. 360192

>Also creepy moids leave me alone because I'm "past my prime". I can finally just be an invisible matron.

This has been such an unexpected blessing but on the occasion it still happens, it freaks me out. I guess it's a good thing that I'm no longer used to it.

No. 360209

this thread is so confusing and kind of funny because nothing's ever changed when i got older. I've never been considered attractive so I'm still treated the same, always had wrinkles since childhood, etc

No. 360248

AYRT. I’m sorry to send you spiralling anon, I want to emphasize that I think my experience is more on the unlikely side. Unfortunately it seemed to happen almost overnight for me around age 31. I used to drink heavily in my 20s and smoked between age 27-30 which can’t have helped. The other thing is I’ve always been ultra lean just genetics and I think maybe a bit more fat on my face would have helped. That said, I’ve done some things right- I stay out of the sun and don’t tan etc. maybe just shitty Scottish genes did me in. Anyway I don’t think you need to worry, you’ll probably be fine.

No. 360267

Telling women with body dysmorphia anything can't help them unfortunately, they need to get theraphy. And look, I don't wanna age either but I just use sunscreen and that's what most women do. Being terrified of wrinkles isn't healthy, me and my friends had smile lines under our eyes at 23-24 and we didn't care. It's fine to have small wrinkles and not look like a messy teen anymore but me saying that doesn't change anything because the media anons consume forces the idea that women have to look 18 or we're worthless.

No. 360378

File: 1700587256255.png (2.14 MB, 2048x1468, 1699580765739.png)

I'm 34, just left a 22 year old, having a crisis about it.
I've always seemed to attract younger guys but I feel like I've suddenly started to look so much worse, and older, like just in the past year. I lost some weight so maybe that's it.
I'm panicking and not sure if I regret leaving him, I live in a college town and feel like I can't compete anymore and should just give up on everything in life. I don't even have a good paying job, I had to move back in with my mom after losing a job a few years ago.
A year ago I was in art school and enjoying my 12 years younger bf, and now I've dropped out of both of those things and I want to go back to school for accounting since I can't stand living with roommates and want to at least have money since apparently I'll never be loved.
I mean, he loved me, but he was also extremely draining and mooched off me, when I quit smoking weed a few months ago I just couldn't deal with him anymore. But I'm really scared I messed up because I had an actual loyal moid. And now I have nothing and no prospects because I'm too masculine. Being GNC and straight is already hellish, now I'm old too, might as well just kms.

No. 360379

All this shit in here recently like “I suddenly look old” and “seemingly overnight I was a hag”! 30-somethings in here are giving me bad vibes. Is there anyone over 30 in here that feels like they still look good or even youthful? (30s is not old)

No. 360380

I've never been in better shape at 31. I've also been bimbomaxxing though

No. 360382

I mean, people tell me they're surprised at my age, but normies love to kiss ass and act nice so who knows. I do think we are all our own harshest critics.
Are you hardmaxxing? I felt like I looked way better with fillers and botox tbh even though it gets a lot of hate in this thread.

No. 360383

Sure, I’m in my early 30s and look the same as ever in the face unless you put me under a magnifying glass and look for fine lines, runs in the family. Plus all my teenage stretch marks have completely faded which is awesome, my body skin has never looked better. And I learned to exercise so my cellulite is gone except on my ass which doesn’t really bother me.

No. 360386

File: 1700588892877.gif (213.79 KB, 275x100, 1476126698197.gif)

I find this life-ends-at-suchandsuch thing so insufferably autistically negative, 23 year olds on tiktok are saying this, it's so pathetic, just drink water, eat healthy, go to the gym, use retinol, take the cold shower, try your best to improve yourself according to what you're interested in, u are fine

No. 360391

I can't help but think it's an awfully big coincidence that in the entire history of this thread nobody has ever said anything like that, but as soon as Ylilauta moids discovered the site we suddenly get nonnies in their 30s aging overnight. Hmm.

No. 360392

I think one of the reasons people say stuff like this, is probably because they aren't/weren't good at self-care as they grew up. Similar situation as people making the joke that you turn 30/40 and suddenly your back hurts all the time. It's moreso that unhealthy movement patterns or a sedentary lifestyle over time are finally showing their effects. As someone who was horrible at self care until I was in my late 20s, I am definitely in better shape and look better than I did when I was younger imo.

No. 360393

I have hypermobile joints and am in my 30s so by all accounts I should be doubling over in knee, joint, neck and back pain every day but I exercise and take care of myself so I don't. I'm so annoyed at the people who make jokes about being in constant pain and going
>haha we're such old hags now, am I right?
Maybe you are but I sure am not. Being in poor health in your 30s isn't normal.

No. 360411

I'm only 22 and have very bad joint pain at times, it's more about being tired/overworking your body than being old. I think having join pain without being exhausted usually happens after you're 50+

No. 360416

This is a nice addition to the topic at hand but you’re 22? No Zoomers allowed here. This thread is for grown ups

No. 360629

File: 1700726452036.jpeg (372.81 KB, 1125x1765, IMG_9438.jpeg)

Sorry for the vanity here, I just have a burning question and wanted some opinions.

This girl on TikTok made a video (picrel) of what people think 30 looks like vs what she really looks like. She looks great and is very obv very pretty, but at the same time I feel like she had lip injections and/or fillers Botox. If so more power to her and I’m wanting to do similar. Do anons here think this is 100% natural? She’s 32

No. 360630

File: 1700726475193.jpeg (1.08 MB, 1125x1774, IMG_9439.jpeg)

No. 360631

Her no makeup less filtered videos look great too, so it’s not just a filter. Her lips seem really plump but it looks like filler to me for some reason. She does a lot of cosplay/weeb stuff so she does know how to manipulate her appearance but naturally her skin and lips/eyes/cheeks seem to be filled and botoxed (tasteful) or I’m just groping because I want to stay looking that young too. Sorry for the vanity!

No. 360632

File: 1700726863359.jpeg (1.31 MB, 1125x1485, IMG_9440.jpeg)

More natural for reference

No. 360633

Her lips looks dumb. Other than that, she is a pretty woman and looks normal for her age in the less edited picture. You can't decide how you are going to age so stop comparing yourself to others. It's a dumb idea. Just take care of yourself the best you can.

No. 360634

> her skin and lips/eyes/cheeks seem to be filled and botoxed
Normal and healthy 32 year old women don’t typically have facial volume loss like that, and if they do it’s not a noticeable difference. Her face looks youthful because 32 is young, only males and unhealthy women age as quickly as you’re saying

No. 360635

True. I guess I just wanted clarification. I’m not trying to compare myself, as much as I am trying to decide what I want to do in terms of “work” as I get older. My lips could use some plumping (has always been the case) and I’m not showing signs of aging yet but I have always had pretty bad eye hollows (since childhood). I’m thinking of having some things enhanced/changed before I’m her age so I’m mostly just curious what other anons think. She is pretty and looks her age in natural pics. I’m not as pretty as she is but I hope to be when I’m in my 30s (I’m 28)

No. 360636

Delete social media. You probably don't need any work done. You sounds obsessed by your look and it can't be healthy.

No. 360639

In all honesty that would be a good idea for me. Tiktok especially heightens my insecurity bc most girls I see on there are prettier than I could ever hope to be. I’ve been diagnosed with severe body dysmorphia since 21. If you can believe it I started at panicking about aging at 20 despite people thinking I was 15 at the time

No. 360640

I'm sorry, Nonna. You should consider deleting TikTok. Think about how often you see women that pretty irl, not often. That's because what you see on tiktok isn't real and comparing yourself to that is bound to make you feel ugly.

No. 360641

i have exactly the same problem as you but i can confirm this nonna right here is right >>360640

i’m elder zoomer (97) and i realised just how unhealthy tiktok is for my mental health and deleted it. please take care of yourself nonna

No. 360647

I'm in my early 30s and thankfully never used tiktok. I usually jokingly tell people i am too old for it lol. i know normies my own age and older who use it, but judging from the content they show me i feel blessed to not have been sucked into that. observing it from outside it's bizarre how braindead and vapid it is.

No. 360678

Same but I still got my brain melted by instagram.

No. 360681

Anon you're 25 or 26, I don't think this thread is for you.

No. 360686

I wish the "nearing 30" had been left out of the thread. The only thoughts anyone has about being almost 30 are (1) oh no i'm gonna 30 i don't wanna be old and (2) i'm already so mature for my age i've been 30 since i was born. They should definitely lurk because posts from women who are 30+ are likely relevant for them but they don't have anything to add to the discussion.

No. 360754

Those lips are obviously fake, nonnita.
That being said she does have great bone structure and is naturally pretty.

No. 361034

This commentator is so annoying, she’s always so negative and bitchy about everything.

No. 361054

Nearing 30 means 28 and 29, if we want to be generous include 27 but no less than that.

No. 361057

File: 1700916683892.png (59.85 KB, 757x758, IMG_0207.png)

I’m gonna be 30 in April and I’m so excited for it. I actually love telling people I’m pushing 30 because it’s funny to say but also they get so shocked. Like people really have this idea that 30 year old women look drastically different from mid twenties women it’s so weird. A girl at my job keeps telling me how shocked she is that I’m almost 30 but she is 27 ???. I feel like once the 94 girlies turn 30 the conversation on 30 something women will shift. And yes I’m only saying this Because I’m born in 94 and think it’s a flex cuz it sounds the cutest out of all 90s and especially new millennium babies lol. 1994 women are coming to take over what it means to be a 30 something women! Mark my words

No. 361254

I'm one of those whose who's terrified of turning 30. Just a few years ago I couldn't understand at all why some women no longer like birthdays and now it suddenly hit me too.

It's not because I'm worried about no longer being attractive to scrotes, I never cared about that. My problem is my huge peter pan syndrome, I simply don't want to be a "proper" adult. I love being my parents and grandpas princess, I enjoy the way most (older) adults in my small town still treat me like a kid and being the young newbie at work is also useful.
I don't ever want to have to stop calling myself "girl" instead of "woman", I can't stand the thought of one day no longer looking young enough to be able to throw on a simply shirt/hoodie, put my hair up in a ponytail and still look effortlessly somewhat cute. I also hate how many new celebrities are younger than me and already living great lifes.

My parents are super loving and patient, so it's not like I'm under pressure by them, but I still feel guilty for not being more normie and for likely never gifting them a grandchild. Making it worse, my siblings are also useless (priest brother and teenage but also already thinking about becoming childless sis). The thought of marrying, becoming pregnant and being a mom unironically triggers me so so much since a few months. I never thought that this life was for me but recently it starting scaring and disgusting me. I can barely consume any media anymore because I feel like babies and happy families are pushed onto you in every single commercial, movie, show, whatever and especially social media. And of course it's the only topic 99% of women after a certain age care and talk about.
I never mocked "older" women as a teen but I still feel sorry for not understanding just how hard it is so age out of the "young woman" range, people can be so cruel to you…

No. 361318

exact same energy i have nona, i'm stoked to be 30 in a few months, was expecting to dread it but i feel amazing and can't wait to celebrate- hope you have a happy bday!!!

No. 361330

You sound short. Like one of those women who uses a baby voice all the time because they think it's cute and doesn't notice everyone including their grandparents wincing.

No. 361378

As long as you're independent you're doing nothing wrong. You're not under some moral obligation to "gift" your parents grandchildren.

Anyway you should probably focus on other valuable things. Aging out of a phase in your life is okay when you have things you value in your life that aren't tied to your age or looks.

No. 361386

At 26 I got a chronic pain illness, now 28 and no signs of it getting better. I always thought that by now I would be married and would be getting ready to have kids in the next few years. Now I can't have kids and my fiancé will inevitably leave me at some point.
I will be moving and leaving alone for the 1st time ever. It's sad but I'm also a bit excited ngl. I wonder if I'll feel lonely. As a teenager I desperately wanted a bf, I wonder if I'll miss it after it's gone. I have no friends now but don't really miss them, so maybe I won't miss having a bf either.
I want to live in a nice place and have a cute apartment with a cat.

No. 362208

I'm 28 and my 32 year old male coworker told me that I'm basically old, like I know it was supposed to be half joke but… It just doesn't make me feel ok. Besides society's perspective being fucked up, I genuinely don't even feel old, and most people assume I'm younger anyway. This guy would assume I'm like 22, like strangers usually do, but he happens to know me and my age so he teases me about it

No. 362210

Kill him.
Just kidding nona. Don’t let him neg you like that, if you’re old he’s geriatric. Start commenting on his hairline and weight or something lol

No. 362233

I don't think he's teasing every late twenties person in his life about being for being "old"

No. 362236

What do you mean

No. 362241

Nta but I assume she meant he’s hitting on you or has some interest in you. Do not entertain it if that’s the case.

No. 362406


How is it not? That's relatively close to 30 and being 25 or 26 is definitely a lot different than being in your early 20s..

No. 362607

Men are very well aware of the fear of aging and utilize it as weapon to neg or just be a dickhead. Definitely "banter" with him about his receding hairline or his pouch see if he likes that. Most men age terribly yet they think of themselves highly. Or even better, cut all communications with him unless it's work related.

No. 369857

I’m feeling incredibly depressed because I never achieved my ideal career of working in entertainment/television. I got sick a couple years back and it completely messed up my life. I was bedridden for like 3 years. I feel like it’s too late for me to start anything now, since I’m already over the hill in media prospectsand have barely any experience, there are too many younger people up and coming now that I can’t compete with. I know it was never meant to be, I’m just so fucking sad. I work a dayjob that I hate now and everything just feels completely pointless.

No. 369860

Anyone else want to cry because nothing is as good or magical feeling as it used to be? I hate this timeline so much. 2000s and early 2010s were so much better. I’d kill to go back to 2011.

No. 369865

If it makes you feel better anon your skill set might not even contribute to that. I was the same a few years back and only got in because I knew two people at the current studio I work for. There was 100% more qualified people than me. If you do have those kinds od connections in the industry try your best to keep them. I spent 10 years in retail before I broke through. I feel embaressed saying that I graduated college in 2016 but I finally have the career I wanted. It's never too late. My other coworker he was in trades for years and this job was his first too with no connections. I believe in you!

No. 369867

Thank you sweet nona but the age range for the job description I was interested in would have required me to debut at around 21 max. I worked hard to try and break through but it took me longer because my parents didn’t have enough money to send me to training early like all the other kids did, so by the time I was working to save up and train I was already kinda over the hill but there was still hope for me, a couple producers told me that I was talented and they expressed interest in working with me.

Then I ended up getting a chronic illness and it completely destroyed me and took away most of my remaining youth. By the time I could attend training in person again they basically just told me ‘Yep you’re too old now and your resumé has a massive gap so we’re not interested and we have no place for you, sorry!’

I know if it had been meant to be then I would have gotten it, I just have so many regrets and my diagnosis was delayed which delayed treatment too. I just feel like I was failed by the people around me and I also failed myself. I’m still bitter about it. I have friends that managed to get big breaks and I’m happy for them but also ache with jealousy at seeing how far they’ve come while I feel like I stopped carving my path at 24. There were only around 100 spots out of 500K+ applicants that were ever available anyway so it’s not like the odds were looking that good to begin with. I also knew a couple people who could have got me in but lost touch with them as they progressed in their own careers and I got left behind. I’m just venting sorry. I just can’t get over how badly I fucked up and everyday I’m filled with regret. I wouldn’t even minded a very short period of success before becoming a hasbeen, it’s so much worse to be a never was. I wish I’d pushed myself so much harder.

No. 369869

Have minded**
Excuse my butthurt rant. I guess I’ll always be salty over this.

When people say you should never stop striving to achieve your goals and dreams, they’re right and you should listen to them. Don’t be like me, nonas.

No. 369870

File: 1703898376926.gif (1014.58 KB, 480x360, OfOb8jJFCVp4zFKPZX8UQC6p9-w=.g…)

Me when I was in me 20's in the 00's, now I'm near my 40's and I feel I haven't archive nothing like my friends had (travels, recognition, a partner…). I would like to be that nonnie that made her hobby for passion, walk a lot with her friends and even have the wish to study.

No. 369883

I regret not living the mid-late 2000s and early 2010s to the fullest. I'm still newly in my 30s so I only got out of high school in 2010 but I feel like I missed out on so much, the late 2010s and 2020s so far are such an awful time to be an adult (or any age for that matter, unless you're rich).

No. 369896


I’m convinced I died in 2016 & have been in hell ever since

No. 370441

I'm in a somewhat similar boat as you, except it's entirely my fault.
It sounds like you wanted to be an actress or a dancer? Did they tell you that you're too old at 24? That's so brutal… I went to school with a 40yo woman who studied acting when she was young, never got any roles and then had to restart her life at 40+. So I always felt like taking classes for that was a waste of time. Back then my teen friends and I mocked her so much but now I feel her…

Since I was in kindergarten, I've always wanted to become famous. First as a model (every adult joked that I should model since I was so tall and skinny, so that planted the first seed), then as a singer, then as a youtuber, then as a musician in a band… Sounds so silly but that's how it is. I can't get it out of my head. And that wish just get's stronger the older I turn because I'm scared of forever regretting my life choices once I'm old.
I've also dreamed of becoming an actress, frankly still do nowadays. I had to do a little bit of theatre in university and really enjoyed it but the entertainment/movie industry in my country is so awful, every young person only consumes foreign media, all those actors here are a walking humiliation, I'd loathe to be part of them. Therefore I would need to go to a different country and who wants to see an actress with an accent? That leads to the second issue of me at least on the outside being a proper adult, with a proper job that makes my parents proud, so I technically have a lot to lose. Secretly going to auditions and trying my luck in my city is one thing, but moving across the ocean to e.g. LA? Insanity.

Then I was 18 I planned to not even start university and instead immediately try my luck. But in the end I wielded to my parent's will and studied for a good girl job. Maybe this was a good thing because fresh out of high school I was so insanely naive, I would have gotten eaten alive. But on the other hand I feel like I totally wasted the last 9 years. I was so young and also pretty, much more dumb and confident than I am now, and that alone gives you a head start in the entertainment industry. Technically I am still "young" now but every year counts… I'm positive that close to all celebrities use fake ages, so maybe we should be just more bold in faking things. I also feel like maybe just 10 years ago competition was less fierce but now everybody is so plastic, even (pre)teens are so great at makeup, styling and photoshop, plus so many shows, brands, and so on just use some social media influencers instead of an actual "artist".

I feel like I must at least try to achieve something with music because otherwise I will never be happy (tho failing could also depress me further…sigh).
My current job is horrible but I also can't truly picture myself in any other career, I would always just continue daydreaming about being a shining star admired by others. People love freshly 20yo musicians but there's still a bit of a leeway to be slightly older or keep your age somewhat secret as long as you look the part.
Another problem of mine is that due to my dream I kept putting off relationships, 1. because I secretly feel like all moids with normal jobs are boring/beneath me and 2. what if I fall in love and then miss out on a great career opportunity? I can't let myself get tied down to just one place, I want the option to one day just pack my bags and go for it. I think I already vented about this in this thread but it's so cruel how moids can hit it bit at any age and at the same time start a normal family because their wife at home will take care of anything while they work for their dream career - meanwhile as women you have to choose between one or the other.

No. 370448

I always wanted to do something interesting like work in animation, or write stories for a living, live in japan but now I keep forgetting how old I am and it's no longer a "one day" maybe thing and my life is quickly solidifying around me. I'm a sahm and haven't worked in years, I just draw in my freetime. It's not a bad life by any means but I miss the idea of being an animator, even though I'd probably still be a mom, just with a shitty job too

No. 370459

I'm kind of in the same boat but without the kid. Even have an animation degree. It just never happened. I've accepted I'll never make a name for myself and I was honestly surprised with how easy it was to give up on my dreams. Sometimes I feel sad about it, but then I read about the state of the animation/publishing industry and remind myself it wouldn't have worked out.

No. 370472

There are many artist that started their art career in their 40's, and now with internet being more accessible to post your art, is easier to reach at certain point.

I wanted to work in the animation/publishing industry too, but the more I have seen the drama and the more I see how easier is to work as freelancer, the better I focus on my own.

No. 370652

Getting older has been great overall but almost as soon as I hit 30, I started to get hormonal acne worse than I'd ever had in my teens. It gets worse around my period but it's pretty much constant throughout the month, and it's deep cyst-type acne that I rarely ever got before. I've also started growing a ton more facial hair, it's just peach fuzz and relatively short but still fucking weird. I got my thyroid and androgen levels tested and everything is normal, no signs of PCOS, my doctor says it's because I'm overweight and I've been finally making progress on changing that but has anyone else had a similar experience? I feel like I've had trouble finding good information on what changes are normal after your 20s but before perimenopause…

No. 370660

I can relate to this. It's only just recently been occurring to me that the ambitions I had, which really resemble yours, are not so easily achievable now that my life has begun to crystallize. I would have to do an insane amount of legwork at this point to capture the same opportunities that used to seem readily available to me. I'm mostly mourning the fact that I'll probably never move out of my country at this point, I'd have to upheave my whole life in ways I don't and may never have the liquidity for. I am already past the age at which I visualized myself achieving these goals. I know it's not too late or anything, we can both theoretically accomplish these things still, but obligations really do accumulate over time

No. 370674

I feel this way. I always used to try to go to fun places to ease my boredom, but now that doesn't hit anymore. Nothing really gives me serotonin, i feel disappointed in how horrible humanity is and my inability to evolve past the point i was in 2012. I should have graduated high school at 21 in 2015 but now i won't be graduated until 2025, not even with a bachelor's degree. If i want that, it's another 2 years of suffering. I am tired. I just want to settle down with a nice house and some pets and be able to look after myself. I've wasted all my youth being hopelessly depressed and not much is changed. I am still sad, my parents have 20 years left in them and i cannot sponge off them all my life. My little sister has surpassed me and is on her way to making 6 figures in a major city. My brother who is 7 years younger will surpass me. I've accomplished nothing, i've just wasted my time trying to be something that i am not.

No. 370676

I do not have children, but i can relate with this. The whole idea of trying to chase your dreams is such a massive lie. It's not practical. The only goal in life anyone should have is not to be in poverty. Only the 10% of lucky people will be able to live their dreams, and for most of those people, that dream will only be a small blip in their lives and they will go back to being miserable and bored. Trying to be the person of my dreams and live my dream life ruined my life and slowed me down. It's better to know your strengths and let the universe guide you instead of playing god and trying to choose your own fate.

No. 370726

Is that really what the other anon said tho?
I know that most people in their lifes at one point likely had unrealistic dreams but managed to let go of them, to lead a more or less happy normal life.
But on the other hand all old people will always tell you that their biggest regret is not following their dream.
I feel like I will never be content with anything unless I at least try. I will be 40 and wonder what if… then 50,60 and so on. And I will always feel like I should have done it while I was still young.

My biggest problem atm is that you have to give up so much. Quitting your normal job, moving away, risking so much, people judging you… all that seems much easier and less scary when you're just a kid.

No. 370754

That sounds like PCOS but I guess your doctor would know… Even if they’re wrong and it was PCOS losing weight would help so it doesn’t really matter right now (personally I would request an ultrasound to look for cysts). It’s clearly a hormonal thing so you may want to look into PCOS treatments anyway, like metformin or NAC supplements. DIM supplements and/or eating a shitload of cruciferous vegetables improved my early-30s hormonal acne greatly. Adapalene gel helped with skin congestion too.

No. 370844

I was actually doing better than ever at age 29-31 (was dating, thin, had 7 quality female friends, lived in my dream city, sister and her fiance lived nearby ) and then when I lost my job and my sisters fiance died everything crashed.

I gained 30 lbs, had to move states with my sister to support her and I hate the place I moved to. I miss my friends and haven’t started dating because I can’t shed the weight fast enough (it’s finally coming off but I won’t feel confident again until it’s all gone).
I wish I’d have met someone nice in my old city so I could have stayed but it didn’t work out.

At 33 I keep fighting the “why bother, life will never be as good as it was before”. Has anyone had any luck picking up the pieces around their mid 30s?

No. 370858

>I keep fighting the “why bother, life will never be as good as it was before”.
Rather than that, I keep fearing that it only gets worse.
At 18 I was still so blissfully naive and happy, just a decade later the reality of being an adult caught up with me, nothing brings me joy anymore, every single day is a struggle. So what will be in another 10 years? Or 20? 30?
The thought that I am stuck in this body with this brain for another maybe 70 years sounds torturous.

No. 370860

The only way out is through. You went through rough stuff, and though things can never go back to that one period of time that you feel was great- maybe this new chapter will become something different but also good? I'm picking up the pieces in my late 30s and as stupid as this sounds, mindset has helped. We'll get through this together. Great job on the progress of shedding your pudge cocoon btw!

No. 370952

it's really not as bad as you think. I went through something very similar when I was your age

Have you considered or tried either ketamine therapy or psilocybin therapy?

No. 371120

>go back on tinder for the first time since hitting my 30s
>I don't believe in 'the wall' but I still assumed I'd be worse off than when I was in my 20s, in terms of how many matches/messages I get
>it's exactly the same in quantity and quality
>most of my matches are at the very bottom of my age range limit (mid 20s)
>all of them are perfectly nice and polite

kek, moids just cope endlessly about what our lives are like after 30, it's always gonna be infinitely easier for a woman of any age. Even if you assume lots of matches are just looking for hookups, there are so many ugly nerdy guys that you just know never get a match and would wife you up simply for talking to them. If we ever got as desperate as men claim we do, we'd have no trouble.

No. 371122

the wall isn't about not having men be interested in you, every woman of any age will always have an infinite amount of attractive young men who are interested in them. Rather, the wall is about it being more difficult to find an ltr with a high quality guy (because by the time you are 35 all the guys who are attractive while also being good partners have been already taken) and about no longer being admired for your beauty by society at large.
The first part really isn't a big deal, and even if it was, it doesn't mean that settling down with some MRA scrote in your 20's is a good solution. But I will admit that the second thing is a bit of a jolt at first. Although now after I have gotten used to it I much prefer it over the constant catcalls and demands from moids passing me on the sidewalk that I smile for them.
Honestly, your better off forgetting about scrotes and just restricting your dating pool to women. There is no return on investment with males

No. 371127

That's what the wall USED to mean (and I never doubted that the older anyone gets, man or women, the harder it is to find 'high value' partners since they are already married), but MRA rhetoric has escalated to the point that they argue any woman over 30 is worthless and hideous with no chance of marriage. They forget that most men are actually hideous so they hardly have an advantage.

No. 371133

You should lower your age limit more.

No. 371134

>but MRA rhetoric has escalated to the point that they argue any woman over 30 is worthless and hideous with no chance of marriage
Even moids can't be this delusional. Men are much more desirous of marriage than are women in all age groups 30 and above. Literally any woman at any age can find a scrote to marry if she wants to and everybody knows that. I'm sorry, I just can't believe that even an MRA would be retarded enough to dispute that.
>and I never doubted that the older anyone gets, man or women, the harder it is to find 'high value' partners since they are already married
But it isn't just that, it's also that with age comes loss of SMV. This effects women more than men because the overwhelming majority of men never had any SMV to begin with (the few men who actually are attractive get hit by the wall a million times harder than women do because, unlike us, they don't have the emotional strength to deal with the loss of their beauty). And women make it even worse for themselves because most women refuse to date younger men, further constricting their already limited pool of potential partners.
And, speaking as an old hag, you can't use sex to control the relationship when you are 38 the same way you did when you were 22. Not only do you no longer have the "it" factor, but older scrotes don't get led around by their dicks the same way that they did when they were young.

No. 371135

lmao what is this scrote shit, stop parroting their nonsense

No. 371138

If you need sex to control the relationship, it's a relationship not worth bothering with. And you sound like a man.
>I'm an old hag
I wouldn't call myself an old hag if you put a gun to my head. Get some self-respect.

No. 371143

>older scrotes don’t get led around by their dicks
Are you sure about that kek (not trying to fight btw, just have had a different experience)

No. 371150

sounds like you are suffering from some moid-like delusions yourself if you're comfortable labeling yourself a hag because you aren't in your twenties anymore and believe in bullshit constructs like sexual market value, as if the majority of scrotes have any standards whatsoever

No. 371151

Wow, heterosexual women make me sad. This sounds like suffering.

No. 371164

if it sounds like a scrote it is more an likely a scrote

No. 371184

>older scrotes don't get led around by their dicks the same way that they did when they were young.
Up to 50% of men over 40 suffer from erectile dysfunction.

No. 371187

>old hag
You need to stop reading Reddit and getting brainwashed with this incel shit. You're old enough to know better.

No. 371188

I'm 35 and the only woman in my friends group not married. How do some women get married so easily? I always pull away from guys I'm dating such that the relationships never reach the level of intimacy usually associated with marriage.

No. 371206

Sounds like you suffer from avoidant attachment issues. While your friends are the secure or the clingy type.

No. 371214

>How do some women get married so easily?
More like how do some women not get married, from what I've seen most women eventually get married or at least end up in a LTR.

No. 371255

I'm 37 and I'm not married and honestly, I don't see it coming up for me in the future. Maybe don't ask why people get married so easily, but ask yourself why you don't care about getting married. In my case, it's trust issues and no man available would meet my standards, so I prefer being single instead of settling for something that makes me feel sad and incomplete. I also don't want to be a mother, that's another thing that makes it easy to not marry or get into a relationship.

No. 371257

34 and not married, I want to be and have a family but looking at the relationships around me throughout the years I've realized that it's always the women who make the compromise, not the men
I had guys chase me in my 20s and shot all of them down, some men I knew even told me that I'll be "sad and miserable" when I'm over 30 because I didn't marry some man I didn't even have what to talk with.
How some men, and even women, expect you to give yourself away and have sex with someone you feel nothing for, is beyond me.
Better single than in a miserable relationship. Idc about sex.
Besides, I've always been single and never let peer pressure get to me.

No. 371392

Same for me, except I'm only 28
>many women nowadays choose to not get married and have children
is such a lie, because where are those people?

No. 371395

Nta. It probably depends a bit on your area and social circles. I'm in very left leaning city and most young women (mid 20s or so) I talk to don't want kids, but back where I grew up in a relatively conservative town, most girls I went to school with are already married with a first kid or serious plans to get started once they find suitable housing.

Objectively it's true fewer women choose to get married and get kids because statistics show that far fewer people marry than previous generations (not sure how much of that is compensated by registered partnership) and that birth rates are dropping acoss the West and developed Asia.

No. 371400

Second the anon who said it depends on where you live. I’m in my 30s and a lot of my girlfriends are still not married and as far as I know they don't really care for it. I never had strong feelings about getting married or having children myself. It was just never a goal for me growing up as I was more career-focused, and it’s stayed that way despite me enjoying several long-term relationships. If I do it, it would probably be low-key and mostly for practical reasons. Probably 90% of my friends growing up had parents who divorced anyway, which I'm glad is an option during this day and age, but marriage these days just seems so superficial, especially when you don't want children. I also can't help but feel like it's rooted in patriarchal tradition. In many cultures it was originally a ceremony representing the woman being traded from one man (father) to another (spouse).

No. 371409

moids now claim the wall is at 25 so all of you should stop worrying and just live rest of your life the best way you can

No. 371430

they have claimed the wall is 25 for years already. Most recently they said it's 20.

No. 371448

Genuinely no one cares about the wall stuff. Stop the baiting, you're killing the thread.

No. 371505

Most moid's can't even tell the true age of women anyway. Incels go on rants about how women hit the wall after like 20 or something and then post a comparison of a woman aged 30 and 55 as proof kek.


No. 371605

Definitely. Other older nonas will confirm: most moids can't even get it up after they hit 35. And if you think younger moids are bad at sex, old moids are a million times worse. Young moids at least put in some effort but older moids it's like fucking a corpse. Moids over 30 aren't worth it, just stick with women

No. 374523

I'm about to turn 30 in a few months and my mother will not shut the fuck up about me not being married with kids yet even though it's somewhat her and my father's fault to begin with. They don't get that I'm too busy to meet anyone because of work, the only men I attract are way too young or they're my age and think I'm way younger, and I still live with them so I have no private life to begin with. And they're weirdos who think sex before marriage is a great sin and women who do it deserve death but we're in a country where not having sex before marriage is rightfully seen as completely insane so there're a cultural gap between me, my parents and normal no muslim men. I also have to deal with all the issues that come from being a grown woman who doesn't look grown because of rare health issues so nobody takes me seriously at all in a very general sense.

Now my 31yo big sister is annoying me all the time and asking me if she looks old because she can't cope with being over 30yo. I think that and my mother also harassing her with the exact same questions must bother he a lot. I legit don't care about turning 30 soon and I even want to celebrate that so I can't fully relate to her worrying about her own age and it's not even like she's worrying about not achieving anything because she's back to college and working in a really good company to do a piss easy job. I think she legit wants to get married and have kids, unlike me. It's so weird, I don't know what to think about it.

No. 374525

>the only men I attract are way too young
What's wrong with dateing younger?

No. 374526

Moids claim the wall as 14 kek they’re hilarious. As a 30+ woman I will keep dating handsome 18-20 year old boys with big hard dicks full of functioning blood vessels and make those flaccid impotent boomer moids seethe as a side effect.

No. 374532

My youngest sister is 10 years younger than me, I had to be her second mom, I changed her diapers and fed her on a regular basis when she was a baby, I brought her home from school and took her to her sports lessons after that, made her do her homework, met some of her teachers when my parents couldn't, would monitor her internet usage because of my clueless boomer/gen X parents giving her an ipad when she wasn't even 10yo yet, etc. so she's a little baby to me. Seeing guys her age hitting on me makes me want to puke, I just can't unsee it, they're all the same little babies to me. It disturbs me and I feel insulted that they think I'm their age.

The few guys my age who interact with me outside of contexts where they're forced to are hideous beyond belief, Muslim trash or hope I'm still in high school. Or some combination of these things at the same time. I'd like to believe I could potentially find and date a good looking man my age who respects me and doesn't have the thought process of a dangerous criminal but given that I'm a clueless virgin it's extremely unlikely.

No. 374922

Now, I'm not 30 yet so sorry if I shouldn't post, but I'm mid 20's on the side approaching 30's, so an elder zoomer. I think a lot of women could benefit from befriending "older" people. Now, I've never, not even as a child, viewed 30 as old, in my mind 20 year olds are basically teens 2.0 while at 30 you are an adult, but still very young. But after befriending a lot of 30-35 year old though my bf, who also is an elder zoomer, it has just solidified my belief that nothing really differs that much post 30. Especially for women, looks wise, pretty much no difference in 20's and 30's. Men however age like shit kek. I think a lot of women with fear of aging would chill out if they actually got to know post 30 women, and maybe even look forward to being 30.

No. 388460

I know people in this thread like to shit on zoomers but I'm honestly so envious of all the cool shit they get to wear without anyone thinking it's weird, and their music is way fucking better than all the boring millenialcore indie that was popular in the early/mid 2010s. 2000s nostalgia is filtering into pop culture which I vastly prefer to all the 80s nostalgia of the last decade. Anime and video games are pretty much just as mainstream as movies and people can straight up style their hair like anime characters and no one bats an eye. It feels like all the shit I secretly liked as a teenager in the late 2000s/early 2010s is cool now.
It feels weird saying this since I'm 29 and technically only a few years off from being an elder zoomer, but after spending my 20s riddled with social anxiety and being terrified of people looking at me, I desperately wish I could dress the way zoomers do and get into more alt styles. The way I see millenials in their 30s around me dress just gives me a sinking feeling of despair

No. 388468

> It feels like all the shit I secretly liked as a teenager in the late 2000s/early 2010s is cool now.
Bruh I relate so much to this. It pisses me off how I had to hide my love for that stuff, and specifically pokemon and then pokemon go happens and everyone openly loves it while I got bullied intensely to the point I actively pretended not to know anything about any nerdy subjects.

I wouldn't go so far as to say nobody bats a eye at weird hair or outfits. Scene kids hair was basically anime hair. Just wear what you want. I do think a lot of things zoomers get shit on for was the same thing millennials got shit on for too with only some differences due to technology changing.

No. 388483

What music do you think is good nowadays? I am always disappointed by new music and feel like it's a consequence of how the music industry has changed lately so I'm wondering what new stuff impresses you.

No. 388493

sorry to necro your post, but stepping in here to agree. I'm 28, and I work in a very female dominated field, mostly with women who are 45+ and I absolutely love working with them. So many of them have amazing careers, great holidays and are really hilarious to work with. They're also great to chat to for general life advice, it's really made me feel more comfortable approaching my 30s and beyond

No. 388498

There's a lot I agree with you about, however I don't think pop media is supposed to be consumed exclusively by zoomers. I do love how recent music is more geared towards international and indie artists. The clothing styles, definitely I wish more women in my age range were bolder to dress up in. A lot of it is just random graphic shirts related to their jobs and just very blocky. My takeaway is that it's just convenient because of being worn out from working something high stress dressing up is an afterthought. I want more summer dresses in my life, I'll have to go out to the local thrift shop and gather a couple things lol.

No. 388508

so I don't think people here would like her since she's genderspecial, but I really love what yeule is doing. her last album feels like all the stuff I was obsessed with as a teenager rolled into one, shoegaze, glitch, moody turn of the millennium alt rock, edgy anime-influenced cyberpunk aesthetics, there's even an aphex twin shoutout on the last track… as a nerdy high schooler who listened to "weird" techno that nobody cared about, I would've probably gone crazy for that.
in general I really like how old school rave and drum and bass is bleeding into pop. to take a mainstream example, it's kinda crazy to hear Pinkpantheress do 2000s-ish pop/R&B over some old school breaks and have that be massively popular. when I was into that stuff it wasn't quite vintage yet, plus now we live in a post-vaporwave world where people are constantly on the look-out for retro electronic music to revive and recontextualize. another trend I like is how much more room there is for international artists to break through, as >>388498 said. random example, but another band I was obsessed with in high school was Mass of the Fermenting Dregs, who apparently just did their first NA tour and is finally getting a bigger audience. there are a lot more Japanese artists who like Otoboke Beaver, tricot, Haru Nemuri, chai, who similarly have broken out into the "indie mainstream". I was just seeing the beginnings of this in my teens and early 20s but the internet has really blurred the line between mainstream and underground. another example, just look at how vocaloid started as this weird hobbyist otaku thing and now is a huge international phenomena that in turn has influenced real life singers like ado (super talented imo).
I do wonder how zoomers are going to dress when they hit their 30s, I guess they'll leave the flamboyant stuff behind in the same way millennials left behind scene. though I guess there's always space for that, a while ago I went to goth night at a local venue and it was filled with elder goths vibing to EBM

No. 388509

I guess we're thinking of very different groups of zoomers (you said alt styles so I guess that's it? maybe you're looking more at fashion online?) but where I live they mostly dress extremely casual and tomboyish and I've adopted a tonne of it in my 30s. Stuff like cargo pants and baggy tshirts and chunky sneakers, it's all really comfortable and I don't feel too old for any of it. I draw the line at the jorts they're all wearing though.

No. 388520

ayrt, ty

No. 388592

>It pisses me off how I had to hide my love for that stuff, and specifically pokemon and then pokemon go happens and everyone openly loves it while I got bullied intensely to the point I actively pretended not to know anything about any nerdy subjects.
Ouch, same. I lost all interest in stuff like anime and Pokemon after high school due to bullying and wanting to have more "mature" interests, but now everyone likes both and I see Pokemon merch at work. I've tried to get back into both, but I hate modern media so much.

Eh, I'm 32 and dress in an "alternative" style and I don't get weird looks, I'm just assumed to be 20-24 instead. Some things like crazy scene hair are suited for high school but nothing is forcing you to becoming an NPC fashion-wise in a few years (unless its a career dress code or something).

No. 388640

I’m 29, I desperately want to have kids ASAP, we and husband moved to a different state which caused us to have to get new jobs. I got a new job that pays well, husband did not. We always agreed I would quit my job to enjoy my pregnancy in peace. Now that dream is impossible. I’m terrified, angry and fearful I’m running out of time. I’m not handling it well, I’m barely handling it period. This issue is causing my relationship to fall apart because I can’t go back to work after only 3 months with my child just to hand them off to a stranger just so I can continue making money this is something I will never compromise on. I feel hopeless, all my dreams being crushed in front of me. He keeps promising me it’ll get better but I see no light at the end of this tunnel. I love my husband and don’t want to leave him but I feel like I’m being forced to because I’m running out of time. Should I just give up on everything and accept my fate? Probably. Should I just continue to rot away in a wage cage until I wither away? Should I wait until new laws are introduced that help mothers out even just a little bit? I don’t know. I don’t post here often because I’m too scared of getting in trouble by the admins, but saw this thread and decided to look for comfort from fellow ladies. Any advice on coping with this would be great. Anything besides “just leave him lawl” would be awesome.

No. 388647

nona you're only 29 (I'm the same age as you) you still have time to have children - please don't worry. I get you would like them asap but is it worth it stressing yourself out and making yourself miserable? you mentioned you moved state, I take it family members are not nearby enough for support? if you don't mind me asking, what are job prospects like for your husband where you live, is it likely he will get a better paying job? Jobs are always tight, it may take him a little while. Additionally, what benefits does either of your employers (if any) give as well? that might be something to look into.

No. 388670

I have a diabetic friend who was panicking about being too old and too high risk for pregnancy in her early 30s and she got pregnant EXTREMELY quickly after she started trying and has a happy healthy baby now that she's at age 34. Don't stress, nona!

No. 389097

Don't you think it'll take you longer to divorce your husband, find a new decent guy, get married to him and finally start having kids rather than him finding a job? I get that you're panicking but 29 is still young.

No. 396720

So… can we revive this because it’s around the corner for me (30) and I’m so terrified. Need support or advice. Want to die.

No. 396728

It literally changed nothing for me, I just turned one year older. However it may have been easier for me since I don't want to settle down with a moid or have children so I'm not fearing any kind of biological clock.

No. 396795

….. why? i do not understand this terror at turning 30. the biggest difference will most likely be that you have to eat healthier bc your body clings to fat more, and you'll have more random chronic pains you didn't before. are you for some reason buying into the psyop that women "hit the wall"? why do you give a fuck what low-value men think?

No. 396807

>….. why? i do not understand this terror at turning 30
Because she's a Zoomer. An entire generation that is terrified of growing up

No. 396957

Technically I’m a zillenial, on the cusp. My little brother is a zoomer (3 years younger) and he’s an elder zoomer

No. 396959

Because youth is valued more than anything when it comes to beauty and a women’s value in our society. To lose your youth is to lose a certain kind of beauty, and you’ll never be considered beautiful like younger girls, just beautiful “for your age”

No. 396960

I don’t want kids either but I’m worried about how my physical attraction will decline as fertility levels drop

No. 396966

I’m 36 and weirdly I feel happier, more on top of things, and more attractive than ever before. In my twenties I was so self-conscious, but people who have known me for a long time keep telling me how confident I seem now. You’ll be okay. My one piece of advice is to wear sunscreen and take preventative care of your skin. You will thank yourself!

No. 396973

Ayrt and I don't really care how I look either, but I have some weird body dysmorphia where I have no idea what I really look like.

No. 397022

Only low value moids prefer women who look significantly younger than themselves.

No. 397152

is it because they can't communicate without memes and irony? sucks to suck

No. 397189

Now that high schoolers in my country are currently having their final exams, it marks exactly 10 years of me having graduated - and I'm still exactly the same, zero growth (except being fatter and uglier). Back then I felt so insanely happy, I thought my life will be so great and I had so many huge dreams but I achieved nothing. I do have a job and I rent an apartment (still spend a lot of time at my parents house tho) but that is kind of the minimum if you're not a total disaster.
I still have the exact same interests, tastes and dreams as I did at 18 while everybody around me moved on and is now at a point of marrying, starting families, building houses, while I neither have any of this nor do I even want it. I feel like not having had many friends and especially not having had any romantic experiences as a teenager has stunted me for life and I've fallen so far back that I can never catch up. When I was in uni I used to complain about not finding a bf because all guys that age immediately expect to fuck - now I'm entering an age at which guys want to talk about having babies while everything I could stomach is an innocent ice cream date. It even still feels weird to refer to them as "men" and not "boys". Same as I don't want to be a "woman".

Since my last birthday I became so insanely insecure about my age, I feel like atm I still sort of larp as young, always being with my parents but that's not possible for much longer, plus one day I will also no longer "pass" as young visually. It's really insane how little I did in an entire decade, I just procrastinate 24/7, somehow magically expecting my life to change into the life of my unrealistic dreams.
Online you often see posts or videos of women in similar situations as mine but they're usually much younger, like "I'm 21 and never been kissed!", "I'm already 24 and still haven't been in a proper relationship!" and yet they're already seeing it as a genuine big problem, while I'm so strangely unbothered by this? I feel like I'm supposed to panic but instead I just daydream all problems away. Some people told me to try dating apps but that would mean immediately revealing how old I already am and that would result into moids easily into their 30s or older approaching me because that's what's considered normal but I just can't. It's not like I'm still attracted to 18yo school boys but (except online) I never see a moid my age that is still attractive either and as time flies by this will obviously only get worse. How am I supposed to find a moid at 35, 40, whatever, if they look like that? I also can't ever imagine feeling ready to live with somebody who isn't family, it would feel too real, too final, like I really gave up all I ever dreamt of and settled for a normal life with a moid.
On the one hand I know that I shouldn't just do things because of what society expects from a woman but on the other hand I'm scared that suddenly I'll be old and feel like I wasted my life doing nothing, daydreaming, being online…

No. 397191

Not much different from the early 20s for me. Wonder how long my hypermobile EDS baby face lasts, I thought it would go away in my 30s but it doesn't seem like it. If anyone else has hEDS let me know about your 30s! I don't get the same ageist comments from people that my friends get so it certainly has it's perks. On the other hand I had hoped the creepy comments from men would end, it's a curse and a blessing.

No. 397192

File: 1715515023708.png (160.33 KB, 1200x1122, special-mm-mariland-md-img2.pn…)

Even moids feel bad turning 30. It's just scary getting older and your parents getting older and the expectations of what you should be and have at that age are scary. You're more aware of your mortality and it's scary! Yeah the process of aging is scary too and not being seen as beautiful impacts you more as a woman, but really there are so many things beyond that. And some of us were never seen as beautiful so it doesn't matter. It's perfectly normal to feel scared about it. It's not only about looks.

I find myself feeling embarrassed cause I like "childish" things. And feel like I don't know how to "act" or dress my age and worry I'll just look weirder the older I get for it… but at the same time I remember graduating high school/turning 21 and feeling exactly the same way. Worried about still having childish interests, not knowing how to a dress my age, scared of the future. It's just the human condition. 30 is just a number and when you turn 30 you realize not much has changed and we're all lost trying to figure out this life.

My best advice is to accept the things out of your control. It's ok to be scared of the future. We're all figuring these things out. I will say the older I get, the less I care about impressing others or pretending to be someone I'm not and it's freeing. I may be cringe but I'm free.

No. 397204

File: 1715516789262.jpg (94.78 KB, 640x904, beauty-and-the-double-standard…)

>To lose your youth is to lose a certain kind of beauty, and you’ll never be considered beautiful like younger girls, just beautiful “for your age”.
For women beauty and youth is always interwined and that's exactly what's so scary, nearly everything else is something you can work on or improve in life but aging is only something that you might be able to slow down somewhat, never stop or reverse. And yet it's something so essential for us in order to get treated well.

Pic is from "Beauty and the Double Standard of Aging" by Susan Sontag, published over 50 years ago and yet still so true nowadays.
Of course moids might feel pressured to have a good job or if they are good sons they feel dread at slowly seeing their parents get old but aging for them is nothing like what women experience.

No. 397206

Yea but I was never pretty so it don't matter to me kek.

No. 397207

You will still get treated better as an ugly girl than as an ugly older woman.

No. 397210

Nah you just stay invisible kek. Rather be a ugly old woman than a balding fat scrote. Ugly old scrotes are immediately treated like predators or a threat. You don't deal with that as a woman. And I really feel like you're a scrote. I think scrotes love flocking to these threads to make women insecure like the worthless subhuman parasites they are.

No. 397212

>feel like I don't know how to "act" or dress my age and worry I'll just look weirder the older I get for it
This is what kills me. I was in a long term relationship for all of my 30s and since before that and now that we broke up, I'm really second guessing what's appropriate, what's juvenile and cringe, what's hopelessly pathetic to mention in a dating profile, to decorate my apartment with, to have as hobbies… exgf was really into nerd stuff and kinda immature and I felt comfortable and unashamed of her knowing who I am and what I like after years and years together, but I don't wanna be 35 with "play video games with me (emoji)" in my dating profile. When I visit other lesbian couples in my city, their homes are always so nice and mature, and as I try to work on interior design after splitting half my belongings with my ex, I can only think of the sort of quick dumb tricks that I used to make my apartment cozy when I was fresh out of college and trying to make cheap walmart furniture look nice. I feel like I spent the last decade evolving to be perfectly suited to one environment and now it's gone and I have to go be in my 30s in the real world.

No. 397309

At least you have been in a romantic relationship, I've been single for my entire life and I feel so late compared to other people of my age, but the worst thing is that I do t even want a relationship, I guess I'll be stuck with the emotional maturity of a teenager for my entire life.

No. 397721

I’m pregnant and choosing to abort due to financial instability, plus I’ve yet to feel a strong urge to be a mom or have a baby. The whole concept of pregnancy sounds like a nightmare to me. Then the aftermath - the toll on the body, the irreversible changes, blah blah.

I won’t lie, there’s a part of me that’s really curious and would likely love the baby to death if I had it. But I wouldn’t be able to provide a stable home life, I’m just not financially secure enough to raise a kid. I can barely handle my cats.

One thing that does terrify me is potentially wanting a kid in the future, but not being able to conceive due to aging. I’m 29 now, I’ve had a couple abortions already (ages 18, 23). I feel like I might be full of regret and self hatred for aborting during the years I had “peak fertility”.

Like, what if when I turn 30-35, I’ll really want a baby and I won’t be able to conceive? That would be a nightmare knowing I had ample opportunity and chose to terminate in my 20s.

Any thoughts on the whole declining fertility rhetoric? It sounds like something that’s perpetuated by men, maybe I’d be just fine in the future. It’s sort of distressing to think about right now though. Am I fucking up? Are we really supposed to keep a pregnancy even when we’re unable to support the baby? Is it a race against time?

No. 397731

i've known plenty of women who stayed fertile so late that they had oops babies into their mid forties. But anyway, it makes no sense to make current decisions based on feelings you may or may not feel many years later, the only sane choice is to make the decision based on how you feel now.

No. 397744

Ugh, knowing my fertility I might actually end up as one of those mid forties ladies. Which is both comforting and terrifying. All of my pregnancies happened with tons of preventative measures in place. I can’t imagine how many I would have had without protection

A baby sounds like a fun experience, I think they’re cute, and I’m like “sure, that would be a fun thing to try out!” But that’s not enough. Babies aren’t experimental unfortunately.

No. 397878

Those fertility stats that show fertility declines mid-to-late 30s are based on nulliparous women. I'm not sure if abortions count (if you need to reach delivery), but women who have been pregnant before are statistically more likely to become pregnant in their early 40s.

No. 397927

I can relate. I feel somewhat lucky that people still often mistake me for being in my 20s. However, it is just prolonging the inevitable and the lines on my face are slowly showing up. I am still insanely autistic with somewhat childish interests and fashion sense so I am also dreading my physical appearance eventually not aligning with that.

I also deeply dread the day when my parents pass and it doesn't help that many of my uncles and aunts have either passed away or are battling cancer. Every little health problem my parents have caused me to worry about them. I feel like my world is going to completely shatter when they finally pass away as I pretty much have no life outside my family.

No. 399500

I know I'm not allowed to be in this thread but forgive me, I don't know where else I can talk about this. I'm 21.

I live in a thirdie muslim shithole. All my life I've been controlled by my parents. I don't have any friends from childhood, because I wasn't allowed to hang out with them after school. My parents thought they were bad to be around and even interferred in my class one day and made them sit far away from where I sit, we were 13/14. The one friend I was allowed to have suddenly turned on me and began hanging out with the other girls and stopped talking to me. I had no one except the internet because somehow at that time my parents weren't aware that I could make friends on there. I made some online friends and lost some. In the end, I'm still lonely and never had a real friendship, or a relationship. All I do is study and play games. My parents did everything a strict parent does, but atleast they haven't married me off so I guess that's good.
Now that I'm older I've gotten better at hiding my tracks and my parents gave up trying to moderate my internet usage, but it's still not good enough. I missed out on being a teen and I'm missing out on my 20s.

I have plans to escape this hellhole, with or without my parents approval. However, I will be in late 20's then. There's a chance I'll be able to leave after I turn 25 but it's not looking very good so 28 is my guess. I will have a somewhat useful degree by then that will allow me to get a job somewhere easily and the rest I'll do in secret if I have to.

In my head, I am 30 already. I feel like I haven't done anything in my life at this point and won't be able to do anything until I turn 30. That's when I will atleast have some money saved up and be fully independant. But then what? I don't know myself. I've never been a girl. No one wants a 30 year old who's still discovering herself and has no idea how to do anything besides work. I've already lived most of my life alone, so what's the point of doing all of this if I won't have anyone, if it's not going to change? Sure, waking up in my own house and being free to do what I want is nice. But it will all get boring very fast. The one person who promised to stay, left me because he couldn't wait any longer. Even if I find someone someday, I don't know if I can truly be myself around them. What if I find the wrong person? Do I have to start over again? One day it will be too late. I don't know if I will be capable of making friends in real life.

I feel like I was forced to grow up very fast when I was younger that now I'll forever be childish. I just wish to go out and run in the rain, but the people here will think I'm crazy and I'll probably get yelled at. I want to be able to laugh outloud with someone but I can't because women are not supposed to be heard. I turned into a very quiet and boring person. I want to be able to dance but I don't know how and I feel awkward/cringe when I do it even though I'm alone in my room. I want to play on a stupid swing, I want to be active. And while I can still do all that when I turn 30, it just won't be the same. My body feels like it's deteriorating and rotting due to the lack of movement. The most I can do is fast walk around my small room or run in place.

I don't want to shit up the thread with more rants about my life, it's just that I have nothing going for me right now, and whatever it is that I can achieve once I'm free, won't be satisfying to me and I'm contemplating if living is even worth it for me. Sorry if I come off as a cringe zoomie, I'm cry typing so some parts might not make any sense I apologize.

No. 399504

>I don't know where else I can talk about this.
My sympathies to your situation but ex muzzie thread.. vent thread.. loneliness thread.. come on so many options

No. 399521

30 is almost a decade away for you. It's too early to get so anxious about it. Your life has only just begun, and you haven't missed out on anything yet. Just focus on school and see where life takes you. Nothing stays the same.

No. 399534

big three o in four days. let's get this over with i guess

No. 399551

Happy birthday. I hope you don't go into a years long existential crisis like I'm going through.

No. 399575

thanks anon, sadly ive had one since i was a teenager. idk how i made it this long

No. 404653

Can we change the rule to only allow age 30+ women in this thread? This shit is so fucking annoying and repetitive. I'd rather see the thread only get updated twice a year than have to scroll through another one of these "waaah aging is scary" posts from a literal fetus.

No. 405396

I'll share something I've noticed on myself recently. I think I'm healing from my body dysmorphia. There are still bad days, but overall, I finally don't care about how I look as much. I used to obsess about my flaws and saw them as much worse than they actually are. I didn't become delusional about my appearance, I simply accepted how I am and stopped stressing myself over it. I've been working really hard on myself, and it would be a lie to say things are perfect, but as I get older, I understand better what really matters to me. How I look doesn't matter half as much as I thought it did. I think part of this healing process came from the ageing and gaining experience, of course I still put in effort to resolve this issue internally, but seeing life happen to me and others around me have put things into a different perspective.
I take care of my appearance, but I don't obsess over it. I certainly don't spend too much money on beauty products as I used to. I can see through beauty marketing tactics and I don't fall for them as much as my insecure 20s ass used to. I'm not attributing all this solely to aging, but I think the experience is part of the contributing factor. I wished I could tell my 20s self to stop stressing so much over this, but I won't blame her for it either.

No. 405401

Happy for you

No. 405402

I was the most dysmorphic in my late 20s, but after 30 I'm at peace with how I look. The things I am bothered by I can change by working out and dieting more.

No. 405407

I'm going to be 30 in like a year and 2.5 months, and honestly I'm kind if excited for it. Idk, plenty of celebrities in their 30s look great, I mean Lana Del Reys fucking 38 and looks late 20s.

No. 406222

Post 30: I’m growing chin hairs.

Since I am favored by God, I only grow 4 big dark hairs and they deeply nourish my 3 million year old inner ape when I pluck those fuckers. Divinely connected to my ancestors and thriving.

No. 406433

I'm 15 years past 30 but what's really crazy is I feel more confident and I love my body more than I ever did when I was younger. Turning 30 felt like such a big deal at the time but honestly, you get older and so much life happens your scale for things changes. I spent so much time in my 30's agonizing over accomplishing things. I do think 30's can be tough and filled with challenges, career, life, kids if you've got them. Maybe it's just me, but being in my mid-40's now, I mean heck it's pretty great except for the disappointment of seeing time march across your face. But your peers get older, too, so you're all in the same boat. People get more health problems, it's heartbreaking at times but your priorities and your standards change. It's really not so bad. I never appreciated how young and beautiful I was at the time. I think I even went through a very frumpy phase in my 30's when I "thought" I was "old". No regrets but I do kinda wish I had used Frownies in my 30's. Also it's true when you lose weight when you get older there isn't as much collagen to snap back. I got a bit chubby in my late 30's and then lost it and my neck/double chin never recovered. Depressing turkey-fication aside, It's really not that bad getting older. Used to agonize about my every perceived fault and how my peers had "better" bodies etc. But once you get older like, people's expectations for how you look go way down. Unless you live in LA or mythical Paris the reality is loads of middle age women are overweight, and because we're tired and generally dgaf anymore if you put even a tiny amount of care into your appearance suddenly you look so great by comparison. When you're 25, 30, 35, basically everyone looks good and some people look REALLY good. Some of us can't ever compete. I couldn't. This is for my average, slightly shapeless nonnas…. all those women with great boobs, snatched waists and lovely round bums in their 20's mostly eventually succumb to the ravages of time. This is where we rectangles with pancake bums can come into our own. Squats have really changed my bum. Middle age delusional confidence is a major beautifier kek my Nigel thinks I'm smoking hot and it took me getting into my 40's to agree. So don't fear your 30's. Wear your sunscreen, do squats if your knees permit and love yourselves.

No. 406436

beautiful post, nona. love you.

No. 407019

I just realized this is a thread for anyone who will get to be 30 soon but I always skipped it because I fucking hate the Taylor Swift thread pic

No. 407428

early 30s here. my birthday is coming up so i’m going to wax on a bit here. as for the good: i moved a few years ago halfway across the country on more or less a whim. had my dream apartment and now own a house. i have a ‘real job’ with benefits. i have a very supportive partner who treats me better than i’ve ever been treated. i’m financially independent. i have a good relationship with my mom. i feel less social anxiety (i used to cry every time i had to go to a social event or even had plans to go out to eat or to the mall). i have developed a very strong radical feminist adjacent ethos and no longer feel swayed by passing social justice trends. i’ve ’come into my own’ in a way, in that i feel pretty secure about my beliefs, opinions, and feelings. i am no longer a doormat and am more comfortable with speaking out. i am comfortable being by myself, and comfortable with being comfortable being by myself.
bad/neutral: i am a few years out of a very long relationship. i am still ‘finding myself’ outside of that. there are still parts of me that feel lost, undefined, and lonely as a result of coming out of that relationship. i do not like my job. i struggle with feeling a lack of passion surrounding what i do, and feel like i made a lot of decisions (or didn’t) that led me to a place that doesn’t fulfill me. i feel like i am ‘too late’ to do a lot of things, or that im running out of time to change my trajectory in a meaningful way. i feel grateful for what i have, but ungrateful for not feeling fulfilled by it. i feel like my sense of wonder and creativity has gotten a bit lost. i miss having deep friendships. i don’t like having a lot of friends, but i don’t feel super strongly about the ones i have (me problem more than a them problem). i still struggle heavily with body image issues and hate myself for letting it impact my life in significant ways. i am in my 30s and still in and out of disordered eating habits.
all that to say, things have changed drastically from my late 20s to my early 30s, and some of that is positive and some negative. i guess that makes sense. i mostly want to address the directionless feeling i have in the coming few years, and make some changes to get myself out of this sort of rut i feel like ive been in the last few years.

No. 408634

I understand where you’re coming from. My traumas make me feel consistently one or two life stages behind my age group peers. I’m 33 and I want to start dating for the first time now. Most dating for the first time advice is aimed at the early twenties at the latest. I get hurt by getting called old because I know I lack the appropriate maturity for my age. I feel like an 18 year old who just happens to be working full time and paying off a house.
> I have detached completely from the younger generation or rather stopped keeping up with music and media so I really exude that "How do you do fellow kids?" energy if I have to socialize with them at work for instance but also feel totally unwelcome by the older crowd
This so hard. I avoid work socials because the people my age (or older) treat me like a kid since I’m single with no kids and the younger colleagues act disinterested in me. Sometimes if I’m lucky I find some unconventional women like myself to hang with but that’s quite rare.

No. 408902

People overstate 20s, you have more energy but less focus. Just like repetition of small tasks your brain adapts to the small similarities in problems throughout life. You learn to stop running into brick walls. I moved out at 26 and am 29 now. I still have tons of energy and would love to finish up further school but finding the time is tough while also balancing housework and my relationship.

No. 408905

I'm actually fine with aging, turning 30, whatever. I'm happy to get closer to the freedom of death and I'm plugging away steadily at my life in the meantime trying to make the best of things.
But you know who tries her absolute hardest to instill terror towards aging in me? My mother. It drives me insane. She constantly tries to make me feel like I'm behind in life, that I've wasted my life, that aging is going to rob me of everything. From my work (constantly demeaning my character in comparison to others and treating me like there's something fundamentally wrong with me to make me behind my peers when I'm definitely at least meeting the average) to my appearance (she's obsessed with the notion that I'm wasting my hair by having it short when I'm young and keeps coming up with insane excuses, like the irrational belief that cutting my hair is slowly morphing it into an unattractive color) she's constantly trying to make me aware of my age. I'm independent and don't live at home, thank god. But I could really do without somebody trying to make me miserable as possible with a natural fact of life.
I don't know why she does this. It's not like she has any reason to believe aging is bad– she's aged well, and in retirement, she's the happiest I've ever seen her. It's insane.

No. 410706

Should I evict a single dad(wrong thread)

No. 410737

depends. is the kid a girl or a boy

No. 411211

I’m a recluse since I feel immature for my age due to lack of interest in getting a relationship

No. 411251

I wonder how much of womens fear of ageing is attributable to all men essentially being pedophiles or pseudopedophiles and the general male fetishization of youth and neoteny when it comes to physical attraction and preferences. Probably a good 95% of it.

No. 411265

if that were the case then why would men fear aging just as badly as women do? Your theory doesn't work
People fear aging because getting old sucks. Nobody likes physically deteriorating (actually there probably are some sick fucks who do, but other than them)

No. 411294

Men do not fear ageing as much as women do, don’t be silly. When men fear ageing it’s at an older age too, more like when they approach 50 - but even girls in their 20s fear ageing. Old men think they “age like wine” and men are valued for things like being successful to a greater extent than women are.

No. 411308

I've been happier in my 30s but despite not being a super political/economic person I do feel stress and resentment how I can't live like how my parents did in their 30s. This is mainly poorfag problems but even now I still work paycheck to paycheck, in debt, can't afford living alone, had to stop taking meds cuz I can't afford it, etc. Whenever I see zoomers scream over how they fear turning 30, I just wish I was older like 40. The older millennials and gen xers had more freedom in their 20s and 30s before the housing crisis and recession, but I was 15 when all of that happened. I wish my 20s and were about traveling and finding your place and 30s is for settling down like boomers say, but it feels like your 30s are your new 20s in this decade.

No. 411310

Same, I have a decent job but everything is still so fucking expensive. When I was in my twenties I used to be so excited to make what I make now, but now my savings is being depleted and I feel scared for the future.

No. 411349

men absolutely do not believe that they age like wine. It's a meme and most men aren't delusional enough to fall for it.
Most men aren't very attractive so they don't lose much value by aging, but attractive men have an intense fear of getting older

No. 411419

Every time I do my taxes I think about how living would be easier if I made this amount of money 10-20 years ago. Everyone I know that have their own house and whatnot are over 50.

No. 411420

just hopping in to say, as a woman in her early 30's with a fair few male friends around the same age, it is hilarious just how much they fear they're losing / will loose their hair. Almost all of them have expressed this to me in the past couple of years. Most of them have full heads of hair, even my brother who is 25 (and we have no bald men in the family) told me he's looked into hair growth serums and shit. I guess I just wanted to share this with you all, so you can keep in mind you can always bully a man about his hairline. He absolutely is thinking about it daily. I'm so glad men are starting to suffer true judgement and feel insecure about their appearances. Old men know they're hideous, it's all cope.

No. 411423

>I'm so glad men are starting to suffer true judgement and feel insecure about their appearance
Men have always felt insecure about their appearance. I don't know where Farmers get this idea that moids are all confident in their looks. It is totally untrue

No. 411874

I regret “saving myself” for marriage. I’m now an old virgin who missed out on college hookups and didn’t even get married lol.

No. 411877

Where the fuck are you ladies shopping I went to the mall today and the quality of everything is garbage. It's all also mostly aimed at younger girls and shows a lot of skin, I just want simple good quality clothing. It sucks cause I went to Japan and the clothing stores there are incredible, everything is very sleek and fashionable and high quality. Idk where to get anything good in the US

No. 411891

My mom had us put 29 on her birthday cake every year until the oldest turned 21, now she does 35 and maybe 40 soon. I always felt like there was no reason to do that but now that I'm going on 30 I kinda get it. I'm not doing it it just makes more sense now.

My response to turning 30 soon is I'm forcing myself to eat plain yogurt for breakfast 3-4 days a week. I stir stuff in to it like peanut butter and honey or fruit and I think it has had a good effect on my internal health.

No. 411896

I didn't even save myself for marriage, nobody was ever attracted to me in my 20s and now it's too late. I don't care too much though, I think I'm too mentally ill to have sex.

No. 412044

I’m getting very close and not coping well at all. I seriously feel like, just being close to 30 has already made me invisible and it’ll be all downhill from here.

I’m mostly concerned about looks. I’ve seen so many women age poorly and lose their beauty in their 30s and I wouldn’t be able to handle that. Maybe it’s because I’m afraid but I already feel like I must look like an old hag…

I’ve spent the last 3 years focusing on heath and everything anti-aging, and that’s only making it worse. I’ve always looked young and I don’t want to be perceived as a true adult woman. It’s gross I know but I feel like I want to kill myself since I had body dysmorphic disorder and gerascophobia it’s only going to get worse. One hint of a fine line makes me want to set myself on fire

No. 412072

Huh I hadn’t heard of that one. Interesting.
Anti-aging stuff is almost all a scam and it can do more harm than good (minor harm but harm you will definitely notice if you have young skin, although everyone will tell you it’s just your natural aging — it’s not) so be careful with that. Working out and sleeping well will do you more good in the long run, it’s not healthy to get obsessed with how your skin looks. Most of us have to accept we are not Lupita Nyong'o and our skin ages like a normal human’s kek

No. 412082

You missed out on nothing. Sex with men is highly overrated.

No. 412083

Lupita Nyong'o looks her age in real life and there’s nothing wrong with that

No. 412091

Oh does she? I haven't seen a super highres image of her recently but last time I did I was like "damn that's impressive." it's like she was not aging. But she's a celebrity so… to be expected. She's not that old but I feel like other celebrities her age look worse.

No. 412099

Nta and maybe it does but I still wanted to know how it felt like, and being an old virgin doesn't help not to feel estranged from the average woman.

No. 412106

If the average woman was being truthful they would tell you penetrative sex with a man isn’t anything to write home about. They may not say it but a lot of women regret or don’t even think about their first time. I lost my virginity at 29. My experience wasn’t bad but it still doesn’t compare to what giving myself pleasure feels like. Buy some lube and an average sized dildo. What you feel will be better than what most men can provide because you are in control and can quickly read want your body does and does not like. Men do not have this foresight and will put their pleasure above yours every time.

No. 412109

The average woman is not basing their relationships with other women around sex.

No. 412115

So true about the skincare. I keep the skincare to a healthy minimum to prevent damage. Mostly avoid the sun, use SPF, drink tons of water, moisturize. Lightly exfoliate with a warm washcloth and use aloe and honey as soothing products.

Truly need to workout more. This is the hardest transition of my life. I’d get a therapist but my health insurance won’t cover one, and I don’t make enough money. I’m in a totally illogical state of pure fear lately. All I want to do is disappear

No. 412116

This. Even the way some men eat pussy is selfish, like they're just sniffing around down there for their own enjoyment. Depressing.

No. 412120

It’s true. Women typically aren’t selfish lovers and even if they were, with a man he always gets what he wants no matter how “selfish” she is. You can make a man cum with both of you fully clothed… a woman may be able to make herself orgasm hands free but can a man give they to her? No. They think pound pound pound and reciting the alphabet with their tongue is enough.

No. 412183

I'm envious. Sex with men really isn't anything special and hookups are degrading. I've seen too many unhappy marriages. Never settle for less.

No. 412299

> hookups are degrading
engaging in hookups as a woman is empowering. It shows that you are taking charge of your own sexuality

No. 412475

Cool, you took the casual sex bluepill. Casual sex is degeneracy for everybody, the men are literally just too retarded to fight their natural coombrains. Women doing it are feeding into doing what men want no matter how much everybody involved is pretending to be empowered you're only hurting yousef by handing yourself out.

No. 412485

She looks her age but she’s a darkskin black women kek, who don’t usually start to look old for a while.

No. 412486

The only time I had casual sex was when I made a moid eat me out, and left when he asked me to reciprocate. That's what women should do, coom and leave.

No. 412652

Honestly, when I see a woman act like being a 30 whatever is so negatively impactful or spooky, it’s like she’s rubbing some basement neckbeard’s belly saying “help me big daddy” because that’s all the narrative exists for.

Get your hands off that man’s belly!

What kinds of harms can anti-ageing stuff do? Genuine question.

Also, everybody fretting in this thread should calm down. There’s literally nothing to being in your 30’s or older. Even if you feel unaccomplished, honestly, just stop feeling like that. It’s kind of vapid and self-bullying to degrade your life for comparison. Do your passions and things you like at your own comfortable pace, whatever you find it to be. Otherwise you might not do them properly, never giving your potential a true chance because you were competing with someone else. You don’t suddenly change or lose your identity in any aspect, incel propaganda is literally their own male cope, turn your brain on and ignore it. If anyone needs to hear it, you’re still good-looking, 30 doesn’t trigger some hideous ageing and even the most scrotey men also find visibly aged women attractive, they just like to say otherwise for ideological reasons.

Pedestalising age groups (especially for universal experiences, what?) is choosing mental illness. Obsessing over a fantasy that can never be met because you’ve chosen to create impossible constraints. Then telling yourself you’re bad for not meeting these most likely underwhelming or mundane and still impossible fantasies. The entire purpose is to put yourself down and revel in melancholy instead of doing anything else. Then when you’re 40 you can do it again with your 30’s and so on. It’s developing an unfortunate personality type dressed up as some sort of reverse aspiration. The ageing aspect may as well be a coincidence.

No. 412672

>now it’s too late
Anon please. You can have sex with college men if you want, trust me they’ll be more than happy to oblige you. >>412099, plenty of people don’t first have sex when you might think and it isn’t weird, nor does it get in the way of any enjoyment.

Indeed none of you have missed anything. Concerning “saving yourself” and being “too mentally ill” for it, what’s great about your position is that you can maturely work through any feelings and hang ups you have surrounding it all before diving in. Know how you want it to be. Then when you do, it’ll be with confidence and you giving intentional direction, instead of possibly getting roped into a fomo induced sense of duty. Like anon said, try sex toys if you’re craving something different but don’t, like literally never bother wasting energy feeling bad for a lack of or in any way unworthy of it.

No. 412673

>just being close to 30
So just being a woman, because there’s no adult life stage before your current one. 20’s is just a newly completed adult in material reality, which lucky for you, doesn’t consult your BDD. Interpersonal experiences will always vary because they’re dependent on different people everyday. Your perception will create and interpret patterns with as much doomerism as it’s setup to.

>lose their beauty in their 30s

>I must look like an old hag…
You aren’t even anywhere near middle aged. If an old hag is what you see in the mirror, then the commercial standard of beauty is “an old hag” whether you can personally recognise it or not. If anything, your issue is actually that you can’t stomach how much everybody loves old hags. The average man/woman not looking to abuse children, is after an old hag. That’s actually the origin of the term “wife” it comes from WILF “(generic adult) woman I’d like to fuck” kek.

>I don’t want to be perceived as a true adult woman

There is genuinely no downside to that perception (aside from sexism of course). I argue with fervour, that all of your best experiences have already been in that perception. People do not necessarily like teenagers, at best they’ll take on an adult kindergarten customer service attitude and at worst see them opportunistically as devices to use (to sell to, for ego or worse). It is an unfortunate delusion to fear that you will lose something, especially adoration when being perceived as a true adult woman.

Maybe try anthropomorphising the BDD messaging. “BDD says I’m not pretty enough”, in reality you’re perceived as a run of the mill, beautiful woman, which is indeed romantically favoured to and more alluring than a child. BDD is like an incel negging you tbh, if you listen to it and give in, you lose and will be miserable.

Remind yourself that curtailing the BDD is never done by believing it. It wants to get worse. You have to look at reality, which is the opposite and also not the other people who’re also struggling or just failing with their own BDD.

No. 412909


You can have sex in your 30s, though? I wasn't ready to date and didn't have a relationship until my early 30s and I was surprised how attractive people found me. I was frankly ugly when I was 20, I didn't understand how to dress myself or do skincare.

The only women I know who "lost their beauty" in their 30s were addicted to drugs or smoking, which makes them look older. This incel mentality is pathetic.

No. 412916

I'm not coping well with aging. Maybe it's because I'm going through such a hard time right now and dealing with my chronic condition but I find myself painfully pining for my childhood, my teenage years or hell, even my young adulthood. Anything except this. It's not my appearance, that's really the last thing on my mind. I can't cope with the fact that time keeps going forward and there is nothing you can do about it and you can never revisit a moment in time again or see your loved ones who have passed away except in your memory. I'm only 30 but I think about how many doors have already closed for me and how I will have less and less opportunities in life with each passing year. Despite what people tell you, it really is too late to do certain things after a certain age. I also don't know what to do career wise, I fucked myself over and didn't go to school or climb a career ladder because I always had suicide in the back of my head. Now I have to scramble to think of what to do and I have to choose wisely because I don't have money to throw around. No savings, make under 20k a year. Pathetic. I'm honestly not interested in building a life for myself either but if I'm going to be stuck on this Earth I might as well try to do something even though all I really want to do is make art and play games before I wake up 10 years later with even more regrets than I have now. Life is so tedious and boring, especially if you don't have money. I still don't want kids but I understand why people have them now.

No. 412930

mid 30s here and did the same until late 20s, I was pretty and had plenty of suitors though but didn't like a single one kek, had sex with an uggo because we had chemistry and tbh I regret it lmao
I'm always carded as looking good "for my age" but this past year I've been noticing some fine lines on my forehead which piss me off.
I hate aging, anyone who comes at me with the "it's a privilege and wrinkles are to be celebrated" can fuck right off. I've been a fit bitch pretty much all my life and I intend to keep in shape.
And since I missed out on college hookups too I want to have sex with a hot fit zoomer at least once,I'm so mad at myself for not living in a bigger city with access to cute guys when I was younger.
>chronic conditions
I got some of this shit too and it forced me to rethink a lot of my life activities, it fucking sucks
>Despite what people tell you, it really is too late to do certain things after a certain age
100% agree, this one is a tough pill to swallow
> all I really want to do is make art and play games before I wake up 10 years later with even more regrets than I have now
I could've written this minus the game part (not anymore), it's hard but stop procrasting and start doing, severe anxiety is a joy thief and ruined some of the best years of my life (20s)

No. 412938

>trust me they’ll be more than happy to oblige you
Lmao no I'm undesirable.

No. 412939

this post transported me back to 2016 tumblr

No. 412943

it's true. If men are allowed to have hookups, why can't we? A woman who engages in hookups shows that she won't allow society to restrict her sexual self expression

No. 412949

nayrt but I agree with hookups only if it's with hot guys

No. 412966

Unless you're deformed and severely disabled I doubt it.

No. 412968

I'm not saying I'm ugly, far from it, I'm just not desirable, I never get hit on, asked out or anything aside from a couple of ugly nerds so that tells you everythingyou need to know. And no I'm not a hikineet.

No. 413001

Casual sex is degeneracy, a vicious societal poison and everyone engaging in it is a retard.

No. 413043

It does more harm than good, and honestly men shouldn't be allowed to at all. Manwhores are extremely untrustworthy. Society is the one pushing this as "empowering" in recent years and dismissing all the downsides, the "restriction" meme is outdated.

No. 413093

The youngest coworker in my team pokes fun at my age since we’re at the same level but she’s 7 years younger than me.
The only edge I have over her is having a bachelor degree I can’t help but feel like a loser when she brings up my age.

No. 413095

I’m 31 and the only real change in my life from when I was in my 20’s is that I’m hotter and less mentally ill now. The main issue I have is I fell behind in math studies because I thought I’d want to be an artist forever, and now that I’d like to get a degree in a STEM field I have to take adult math classes.

No. 413101

I promise she's less attractive than you and that's why she's doing it anon lol I get the same shit from younger girls who are mad I somehow manage to miraculously still be hotter than them at my decrepit age

No. 413108

Are you the one in a bunch of threads lately talking about how everyone is secretly super jealous and intimidated by pretty people? Have you ever considered you have an annoying, narcissistic image obsessed personality, and that's why people don't like you? People like you aren't as subtle as they think.
Women who make fun of older women will find themselves very sad and lonely when they get to the age they made fun of for being pathetic and ugly. The only people who care about it are losers with a middle school bully mentality. Depending on your field, you could keep working up, if you wanted.

No. 413112

start calling her your daughter.

No. 413122

pearls before swine babe, she only does it because she knows it bothers you. sounds like she finished high school not that long ago which isn’t the flex she thinks it is. shes going to freak when she “hits the wall” since age is that important to her, remind her to enjoy it while she can. don’t forget to congratulate her on her birthday next time for being one year closer to 30!

No. 413124

crone colleague here thanks for your replies, I’ll try not to take mean girl behaviour too personally

No. 413212

I'm not comfortable with people "complimenting" me for looking younger than I actually am, to me it means that I come across as immature and childish. Also do people think 30+ women are all frumpy moms or something?

No. 413215

I get bristle at being told I don’t look my age when I say I’m 33 since it implies I’m insecure about it.

No. 413229

I just laugh and say "it's the round face and big eyes" but I have a round face and big eyes so I get this a lot from cashiers and stuff, no one that I'd be worried about seeming immature in front of. I don't really look young, it's just if you don't know me and just quickly scan the head/eye shape it reads as young.
Who says that kind of stuff to you?

No. 413238

>Who says that kind of stuff to you?
Literally everybody, from boomers to zoomers everyone is surprised anytime I tell them my age. I do have a case of round face and big eyes like you, I don't dress particularly mature either, and my autism can make me come across as somewhat naive, but I'm so scared people are not taking me seriously.

No. 413315

I actually got "but you look so young!" quite a few times. I just ask them if it's a subtle diss and they're calling me old at 33. I know it's not and they're clumsily trying to compliment me or get onto my good side but it sure is tone-deaf. I also think I look my age, I just have short hair and dress very casual and androgynous because I like it that way. Which I guess reads as younger because it's not very adult corporate girl boss of me or whatever.
Ask her if she cries into her birthday cake every year next time she brings it up and tell her it sounds like a sad existence

No. 414197

I always found women in their 30s more attractive when I was younger and looked up to them and the confidence I felt them have. Obviously a generalisation, but that was my worldview. Now I’m half past 30 I can’t feel that way about myself. I also feel the attitudes have changed and ageism is off the charts these days. Anyway, best I can do is continue to stay fit and save money to at least be financially secure, after struggling with money all my 20s

No. 414259

Does anyone else plan to be the scantily clad old woman at the club now and in the future?

No. 414263

I'm 28 and feel a mix of emotions about things. I'm getting married soon which is nice, and we're financially stable. But I feel like I'm so behind in terms of career (used to be a NEET for years, only got a job a year ago so I'm entry level when people my age should be midweight/almost senior) and aspirations (I do gamedev as a hobby, I'm decently popular and make some money from it, but it feels like everyone in my niche is a college student with tons of free time and I can't compete with their output speed).
We'd like to try and have children in the next few years and I'm so worried I've shot myself in the foot by starting everything so late; most women seem to have much more established careers and hobbies before they have children. I'm scared I'll ruin my career (not that I really enjoy wageslaving, but I want to make sure I'm not fully dependent on my Nigel's income in case anything ever happens) and won't ever have time to dev anymore. I don't want to push back trying for children in case my PCOS makes it take years, too, and I'm scared having children at an older age would make them have tons of disorders (my dad was in his forties when I was born and I'm sure that's why I have multiple health issues).
Things are probably not that bad, but I just feel so stupid for wasting years of my life being a socially anxious NEET and only getting my shit together recently. I've wasted so much time.

No. 414268

I've chipmunk cheek genes that make age hard to pin down. Never knew how to react to way off the mark age guesses but a few years into my 30's it's getting weirder. People expect you to trip over yourself flattered and that's becoming more obvious

No. 414321

File: 1720890455177.jpeg (222.7 KB, 1200x630, IMG_0258.jpeg)

I’m going back to school to finally get my bachelor’s degree. I tried and failed in my early 20s but I flunked out 2nd year. I got in for neuroscience but I’m hoping to transition to a more profitable major. I see some of my friends have well-paying jobs in cybersecurity and I wonder if I should try that instead.

No. 414348

I was fat all throughout my 20s and never got to wear skimpy clothes. I'm in the process of losing weight now in my 30s and once I hit goal, I'm gonna wear nothing but crop tops and miniskirts. It will be glorious.

The brutal truth is that kids are likely to ruin your career either way, unless you have an exceptionally amazing husband. In most relationships, the mom is the one who is default expected to take the kids to appointments, pick them up from school when they're sick and stay with them, attend their school functions/conferences/volunteer, take them to play dates etc and they end up either missing at least some work for all that, or they simply aren't able to produce as well as men or people who don't have kids yet because they have more stress and are busier. Remember everyone thinks their Nigel will be different and take on equal responsibility but it rarely happens when the time actually comes.

No. 414370

>not even 30 yet
>financially stable
>kids soon
>so good and popular at hobby that I earn money from it
>'I'm so behind, guys!'
…is this bait? What 20-something year old is a senior at work? I'm your age, never took a break to neet and I'm still somewhat the baby at my workplace.

No. 414619

It isn't bait, I have a few coworkers who are technically my superior and younger/the same age as me, and multiple people in my hobby who are younger than me are doing it for a living (which I wish I was doing).
I do understand I'm probably being a dumbass and only focusing on negatives. I'm happy about a lot of things, my main concern really is that being entry level while going on maternity leave will probably be a recipe for me getting laid off when returning and never finding work again.

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