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File: 1670609559211.png (627.74 KB, 529x758, nemi.png)

No. 1438835

Previous threads:
>>>/ot/1198440
>>>/ot/586560

Discuss anything pertaining to Autism, Aspergers or ADHD/ADD experiences as a woman here.
Talk about the difficulty of diagnosis as a woman, the struggles with being compared to male autists. Or even discuss the recent uptick in autism diagnoses in online mental health communities like Tiktok.

No. 1438837

Oh another one already? No shock here

No. 1438852

the thread image is from a comic called Nemi. i really like this one because it sums up masking so well, but could only find a shitty scanned picture of it.

No. 1438915

>>1438852
Have the first two volumes at home. My friends used to save the strips for me when they saw them.

No. 1438922

>>1438915
i found the second volume in a charity shop in my city and was so excited.

No. 1439259

>>1438835
I feel like this pic implies we are all either monsters, dead, or deeply depressed inside which isn’t true. A neutral face underneath would make more sense.

Autism gets demonized enough already, no need to do it ourselves.

No. 1439344

Does anyone know any sites where you can have in-depth intelligent conversations about various topics? I feel like whenever I try to do this, someone who either knows much less than me or must be trolling comes along and picks arguments and derails the thread. (Just why. Do they not have anything better to do with their time?)

Best I’ve found so far are some of the niche academic oriented subreddits that are small enough to be heavily moderated but as it’s part of reddit, I’m still wary of most of the posters.

No. 1439488

>>1439344
Old school forums are your best bet in my experience, if you can find one for the specific topic you want to discuss. The people the attracy and the discussions held are more effortful, but it goes hand in hand with being less convenient. I don't think you'll truly find all you want congregated in one site.

No. 1439496

>>1439344
What topics? I might know one or two sites depending on what they are.

No. 1439525

>>1439496
Well right now I’m trying to work through this list so discussions (not arguments) about things related to these topics would be nice:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_to_Read_a_Book#Reading_list_(1972_edition)

There’s r/ClassicalEducation for this specifically, as well as all the broader ones like r/philosophy and whatnot. However the bigger the subreddit, the more dummies/trolls there are and useless power mods and people who nitpick grammar. Plus reddit discussions only last 24 hours which is annoying. The only good one I’ve found is r/askbiblicalstudies but that’s the exception, not the rule. Haven’t found anything off of reddit.

It’s kind of sad that it seems you can only get discussions like these by taking a course or mixing with wealthy/upper class people (who are more likely to have gone to better schools and be more “cultured”). Where are all the normal people who are trying to self educate?

No. 1439530

I like the new OP image good job. I can stand this for upcoming months of this thread.

No. 1439690

>>1439259
that's not how i see it. if this comic is an example of how it feels masking, then i see that last panel as her feeling like death, after a full day of it. I dunno but I relate to it somehow.

No. 1439766

File: 1670678874478.jpeg (79.36 KB, 454x651, peanuts.jpeg)

Any of you nonas get misophonia (getting triggered by noises like breathing and chewing)?

I feel bad about this but my cat is a big trigger for me. I put her food and water away from places I normally sit and generally either leave the room or put on some background noise if she starts grooming herself. The worst is when she starts licking herself on my bed when I'm trying to sleep. I'm trying white noise but it only helps so much.

I'm also worried about having Christmas dinner with family and being close to all the chewing and swallowing sounds which put me in such a bad mood. I always shut down at the dinner table. I'm thinking maybe background music might help? Does anyone else have solutions to this?

No. 1439789

>>1439766
Too much. Sometimes even my own chewing/breathing/heartbeats. It's hell and I hate it

No. 1439790

>>1439789
>>1439766
Samefagging cause I forgot to answer you. Yes, background music and sometimes even the loud chatter helps. Put on some loud festive songs, people won't notice it's not for regular reasons. Try to sit relatively far from people, go to bathroom breaks often or get up to "get food". That's how I cope

No. 1439795

File: 1670681314263.png (135.4 KB, 532x538, ear plugs.png)

>>1439790
Thank you, that's true about the loud festive songs. The regular breaks are good too. Sometimes I take a long break until the majority of the eating is done, and then return to eat mine later than everyone else. I don't care if they think I've been in the bathroom having a long shit, I just can't deal with those sounds.

>>1439789
Oh god, same here. I get so bothered by my own noises too. It's impossible, really.

Have you ever tried those Loop or Calmer ear plug things? That are meant to filter out certain noises? Apparently there are kinds designed to dampen internal noises too. My only problem is I generally don't like things in my ears for very long. Tempted to give them a try though.

No. 1439805

File: 1670682382954.jpeg (1.29 MB, 1242x2132, AC7F1786-73F4-4B73-9881-EE0A18…)

I genuinely believe there is some kind of mass hysteria/ tiktok induced psychosis relating to disorders. It is statistically impossible at the rate in which so many people online are claiming to be autistic. I don’t even think it’s intentional, but I believe it is something akin to munchausens disorder. They have picked up these symptoms from tiktoks they’ve seen; and are playing up symptoms that are completely normal in neurotypicals in order to persuade themselves, and those around them that they are in fact autistic. I don’t believe all of this “masking” bs. It seems to be a copout for why they haven’t shown symptoms until it gained popularity because of the uwutism girls

No. 1439808

>>1439805
And despite being diagnosed as a child with autism, I never had the stereotypical symptoms such as sensory issues in most things, yet now after I have watched all these people talk about their sensory issues even I STARTED BELIEVING I HAVE THEM, and my pre-existing sensory issues got worse. Media and our consumption of it is incredibly powerful and this is something psychologists and people who claim to have autism should be mindful of. But why would they be? They love being apart of the quirky neurodivergent club.

No. 1439810

>>1439805
>mass hysteria/ tiktok induced psychosis relating to disorders
Nope. I watched a Youtube video that claimed the same, it was like "ooh spooky hysteria and tiktok brainwashing". It's just moronic people lying for attention, no deeper than that.

No. 1439813

>>1438835
And yet another stereotyped thread image portraying an autistic woman as a mysterious beauty who masks all the time and waaaa me never be myself cuz people gon think my cute stims are weird waaaa and how I am slightly socially awkward isso weird waaaa

No. 1439814

>>1439810
Are you sure? But what about for me, I feel like my sensory issues got worse with consuming autistic content. I honestly am my best self when I don’t watch people stimming and stuff, reading is fine but honestly I can’t help but roll my eyes at some of the things I read because everything is so fucking stereotyped and I’m so sick of it I am so over this all

No. 1439819

>>1439805
Yes to all this but don't make the mistake of thinking that "masking is bullshit" just because some people use that term for their fake disorders.

>>1439810
>>1439805
I definitely see the mass hysteria connection. But also, as a nona said in the last thread, every single symptom of austism is something normies experience too. And when those symptoms are amplified by external causes, like social media or lockdown etc. paired with the fact that there is absolutely zero gatekeeping and even encouragement in having a disorder, it makes a lot of sense how so many people think they are ND.

No. 1439821

>>1439819
Yeah you’re right. I apologise. I just feel upset about this sometimes and feel threatened for some reason

No. 1439825

>>1439821
I totally get that. It makes me angry to see it always portrayed as a cute, positive thing and anytime anyone posts something like "could i be autistic? i watched a tiktok video and related to it…" and all the comments are affirming. i think the default should be "probably not" and discouragement from self-diagnosis being taken so seriously.

pathologising normal human behaviour, whilst neglecting those actually suffering, is a very profitable model so unfortunately i don't see this lifting any time soon.

No. 1439929

>>1439805
>autistic
>15.5k likes
lol no

No. 1439930

>>1439805
I know this is tiktok cringe but I’ve thought about doing this before. Don’t think it’s possible though. The fake sounds of enthusiasm and interest I do whilst people are talking to me are so entrenched in who I am at this point, it’s like a reflex. Also, when people start talking to me about something they’ve already talked to me about before, I start getting irrationally angry, like why are you putting me through this twice? I just don’t want to have to talk or react to other people. It’s a performance. Sometimes, I point it out and they just totally ignore me and carry on yapping about it. Also, when I’m involved in a conversation I don’t want to be in, and I have something to say back, and they fucking interrupt me. It gives me stress diarrhoea.

Also I hate people who think that just because they have adhd, everyone should just let them interrupt people. No you fucking asshole. Don’t you fucking dare interrupt people. I have adhd and I had to put up with being slapped and sent out the room for interrupting as a child, why don’t you learn to behave like a decent person instead of using your disorder as a scapegoat for what a selfish twat you are?

No. 1439955

>>1439930
Normal people repeat themselves more than autists at this point. I'm hyper aware of everything I say and if I sound unnatural when I talk to people, but they just say things with no regard for people's body language like you said. Is it actually more normal to not care about those social cues, or am I hard to read because of the autism?
Also, I just wanted to vent about how I feel like I am a fucking alien from The Thing. I wonder if people notice that I'm acting in a forced way. I think I end up coming off as closed off, cold, or rude sometimes but I'm just trying to calculate what to say that won't be odd and make people avoid me. It's so tiring and makes me feel worthless, I don't even want to try anymore.

No. 1439961

>>1439805
It’s the new trans. People don’t engage with literature enough to realize that the feelings they have that they think make them special have been had by everyone at one point.

Wild to think that in the 90s wearing glasses to school was enough to get bullied and now people are openly larping being r*tarded in front of the whole world.

No. 1439971

>>1439961
You can say retarded here, you know

No. 1439996

>>1439805
I agree, especially with the masking bullshit. I was diagnosed at 6 and then again by a neurologist at 16 with autism. I never have felt this “masking” thing before, and I’ve never personally felt extremely full blown uwu special different. Just like cool, got some weird quirks. So does everyone.
>>1439955 I fully feel this too. I am crazy aware of myself and everyone else’s small behaviors. No one notices anything. And I also come off as cold. Like a bitch tho, not a “oh she’s autistic way”. People can’t tell, they just think I’m a blunt cunt. I find all this tiktok autism shit to be the most cringe, inaccurate thing on there. Oh god especially those girls that will jump and flap and call it “stimming”. We can all tell they’re not that low functioning and it is so fucking offensive to autistic people that are non verbal and unable to take care of them selves. You know, like actually fully disabled people.

No. 1440004

>>1439996
but isn't masking simply suppressing behaviours that you're bullied for? and that is a tool non-autistic people use too, all the time. it just means trying to fit in, basically. i didn't exactly know what i was being bullied for as a child but i "masked" by just staying quiet and/or copying people as best i could. tiktokers now say masking is just being able to act "normal" 24/7 but fEeLiNg sPeCiAl inside… it's also not something that low-functioning people are able to do. but i definitely relate to the original term, even if it's been co-opted by narcissists.

No. 1440005

>>1439766
Yeah, very much so. I ate in a separate room from my parents as a teenager because I couldn’t deal with the sounds. My misophonia has somewhat extended to my mother’s voice now, but I can never let her know because I know how much it would hurt her. I hate it so much.

No. 1440007

>>1440005
wow same with my mum. my problem with her voice is because she speaks SO LOUDLY. i will be standing a foot away from her and it sounds like she is yelling. the urge to cover my ears is so strong, sometimes i try to disguise it like i'm just resting my chin on my hand. she also sighs and yawns a lot etc. i feel bad for how much it rages me inside.

No. 1440014

>>1439766
Not for general chewing noises, but maybe that's because no one eats like a camel in my family. But I'm also very triggered by my dog licking himself, I always tell him to cut it off when he comes all the way over the house just to sit next to me and start licking his dick and legs. It's such a disgusting, wet sound.

No. 1440032

>>1439819
> every single symptom of austism is something normies experience too
Social isolation also bring out a lot of behaviours that are associated with autism, that's why every 4chinner is convinced they're autistic without ever being near a psychologist. Of course it could be that someone becomes a loner because they're autistic, but it also seems that extreme isolation because of some life event also leads to very autistic social behaviour down the line, because socialization is like a muscle

No. 1440046

idk about this masking thing, but at least I feel like I can perform better socially on some days than on others. Like if I'm feeling good and have slept well etc. I can act semi normally and not come across as a huge sperg, but if I'm tired or pissed off or anxious for some reason I'll go into full tard mode and just act like the stereotypical autistic moid, talking with a monotone voice, not being able to look at people in the eyes, twirling my hair to the point it looks obsessive and retarded, snapping at dumb things etc etc. I've always thought the better days are the ones when I'm able to mask better.

I'm not very self aware though. I was diagnosed as a kid, but in my teens I deluded myself into thinking I wasn't actually autistic. Turns out I just didn't realize how retarded I come across to others.

No. 1440057

>>1440046
Irritability varies a lot based on how much your basic needs are fulfilled, like being well-rested or eating normally. Like I can be the sweetest person usually, but if my blood sugar is low I'm the most impatient asshole you'll meet, and it has nothing to do with the person talking to me.

No. 1440081

>>1440004
I can agree with that, but I’ve personally never done it, couldn’t figure out how to as a kid and was bullied a lot. Now I just don’t care if people find me rude or strange and I don’t believe I really come off any different anyways. So many people nowadays are weird as fuck or just blatantly rude, so my behaviors, if any, probably go unnoticed. Like you said, everyone “masks” in some form of it. I just personally could never find a way to fit in. (Doesn’t help I’m extremely tall and gangly, I just stick out no matter what) but I can see the original meaning of the term and how others relate.

No. 1440125

File: 1670703887626.png (508.17 KB, 1080x1097, Screenshot_20221210-141157~2.p…)

>>1439805
It's always the same on TikTok… BPD girls self-diagnosing with autism to get attention. It's not worth trying to find autism content there because people will straight up lie about their diagnosis status, even tagging their videos with #latediagnosed, etc

No. 1440128

>>1439961
Did you seriously just censor retarded?

No. 1440291

File: 1670712202622.jpeg (85.8 KB, 1200x750, 87FF762F-0636-4E56-B322-15750A…)

>>1439955
>I feel like I am a fucking alien from The Thing
I always really related to that cringe speech in American psycho.

No. 1440295

>>1439805
>It is statistically impossible at the rate in which so many people online are claiming to be autistic
proof?

No. 1440481

File: 1670720699787.png (43.28 KB, 261x213, bruh.png)

I am diagnosed with autism & ADHD. Here are some books that can help questioning anons, as well as anons that need help managing symptoms. I’ve also included books to stay away from. All of these titles are available on Library Genesis.

Recommended
Taking Charge of Adult ADHD by Russell Barkley
This book has invaluable techniques for managing shitty ADHD brain. If you’ve ever wanted to do something, but just couldn’t make yourself do it, this is the book for you. Barkley describes why ADHD people are bad at certain things, and then gives us techniques to help each symptom. I love this book because it got me out of task paralysis on a big project at work.

I Think I Might Be Autistic by Cynthia Kim
If you’re researching clinical symptoms of autism, this book is #1. The author defines and translates the ambiguous criteria of the DSM-5. She also writes about the diagnosis process, which eased my anxiety of the unknown as I sought testing.

Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate by Cynthia Kim
This is a narrative about the author’s life with autism and how she’s learned to cope. I usually dislike autobiographies because they can become overwhelming dumps of negative emotions. However, this book emphasizes advice within the life story. Each chapter has tables and bullet points that summarize symptoms for readers to compare themselves to.

Not Recommended
Unmasking Autism by Devon Price
I heard about this book on social media and got one chapter in before it raised red flags. The author’s fixation on autism as an identity rather than a disability is off-putting and unhelpful. Upon further research, I found out that the author is self-diagnosed (she’s also a TiF, a furry, and generally a lolcow).

Odd Girl Out by Laura James.
This book is a first-person thought stream of a year in an autistic woman’s life. The vivid detail describing James’ sensory problems is accurate, but ended up making me uncomfortable. It's also a drag to read about her annoying husband.

No. 1440539

>>1440481
>unmasking by devon price
ugh yes, she is another middle class academic narcissist with no clinical experience in dealing with autism, only her own experiences and theories which are not universal. so frustrating that she gets to be a spokesperson for asd. almost everything she advocates for, i am strongly against. it's amazing.

No. 1440973

>>1439930
>when people start talking to me about something they’ve already talked to me about before, I start getting irrationally angry
>>1439955
>Normal people repeat themselves more than autists at this point.
Non-autists repeat themselves so much all the time, it confuses me so much! People around me ask me the exact same things they've asked before, and they bring up topics to talk about things we've already talked about. We are having the exact same conversations over and over. It's not even things that could have changed and thus could warrant an update, it's just all sorts of random things that they forgot we ever talked about. I'm not a savant autist with a super good memory but dear god are normal people forgetful. And I can't call them out in it because they really don't remember we've talked about it 5 times before. So I just play along now.

This used to annoy me a lot, but I've found it comes with some pros as well. I now use the opportunity to fact check things they've told me before, to evaluate how trustworthy their information is. I had one person change their numbers too much from time to time so now I know he is someone who exaggerates and I shouldn't trust his numbers too much. The other pro is when they they tell me about some interesting facts and then forget about it. I have some people who think I'm super smart just because they bring up a topic and I already know everything (that they know) about it, and they somehow have no idea it's because they've repeadely told me those things.

Sometimes I think this is only because they have a rich social life and they talk to so many people they forget about it, wheras an introverted autist like me only talks to a few people and therefore remember the conversations more often than they do. But even so, you'd think the 5th time they ask me something they'd at least acknowledge that they forget what I replied but instead they genuinely think it's the first time they've asked.

No. 1440975

>>1440481
>the author is self-diagnosed (she’s also a TiF, a furry, and generally a lolcow).
That's your average "autist" on tiktok right there! I wonder what is actually going on with these people or if they're just 100% attention fueld liars.

No. 1441096

>>1440973
How often must they be having the same convo if you get it x5 and they have many friends. I never understand this. Do they not bore themselves?

No. 1441993

>>1440973
>>1441096
You all do this too, you just don't see it that way because if you remembered telling the story/asking the question before you wouldn't be repeating yourself obviously. Autistics' unjustified feelings of superiority about every little thing are so ANNOYING.

No. 1442563

>>1441096
NTA but my least favorite is when people change their point in between repeats too. It’s like some of them just want to argue and it genuinely turns me off speaking to them again. If your not consistent in your morals and thoughts why do I give a shit about what they are?

No. 1442589

>>1441993
Sigh. I had hoped that the “everything autists do must be worse than non-autists” poster was finally gone

No. 1442592

>>1442563
people are large. they contain multitudes

No. 1442772

>>1442589
AYRT, idk who you're talking about. i avoid engaging with autistics as much as possible but unfortunately we are sharing a thread even though ADHD and autism have nothing in common and aren't related to each other and the UNENDING sperging about how strange and horrible normal people are compared to autistics finally got to me

No. 1442794

>>1442772
God forbid we get one space to criticize neurotypicals. You're not normal, btw. Normies think you're an impulsive, lazy freak, and caping for them won't change that.

No. 1442809

>>1442794
Nta but normies think adhd people are just excited or childish at worst while most normies are seriously weirded out or borderline scared of actual autists.
Source: How I view both as a neurotypical myself.

No. 1442847

>>1442589
She didn't even say it was worse, she said that it's complete selective bias, because you won't notice yourself repeating shit as much, especially if we assume it's only occuring because the person genuinely forgot.
Also most of the time I notice normies repeating themselves because we talk relatively rarely, and they have a lot of friends, so they don't remember who's informed on what. Meanwhile, not counting small talk, I can count the number of people I talk to weekly on two hands, so of course I'll remember what they've told me.

No. 1442887

stop putting adhd here. it's not related.

No. 1442892

>>1442854
There are studies that show male autists are more likely to harass women both sexually and physically compared to normal males - who already abuse women very often. A lot of NT people are offput by autists and their antics but autists are too facially blind to read their subtle clues so you just assume we're ignoring you. When in reality it's creepy when you disrespect our personal space and boundaries and keep talking about your weird personal interests which are most of the time inappropriate.

No. 1442960

>>1442892
We really don't need to be reminded that supposed "normies" hate us. You can't complete a thought and normies think you're manic. You're using us as a way to feel better about yourself when normal people think you're just as useless.

No. 1442970

>>1442960
nta but adhd isn't autism the same way depression isn't. you just seem upset that people with adhd don't want to be associated with you.

No. 1442978

>>1442960
Im the anon you're replying to and I don't have adhd. It's just that I'd be fine being around people with adhd yet I feel very uncomfortable near autists, most normies feel the same way so stop acting like your autistic ass is superior to adhd anons.

No. 1442985

>>1442978
most normies think adhd only affects kids and stops when you're an adult anyway. either way these threads being combined is a cope.

No. 1442987

>>1442592
Sure but if you tell me on Monday you like don’t agree with insert anything here and then on Thursday you do agree and deny ever disagreeing, I’m going to think you’re full of shit and stand for nothing. You probably shouldn’t change your opinion on shit like whether women deserve same sex spaces like it’s your favorite color or flavor of the week if you want me to think you’re coherent.
They just lie and agree with reactionary shit anon.

No. 1442988

>>1442887
60% overlap. Get over it.

No. 1442989

>>1442970
I don't think ADHD is autism, I think it should have a different thread. Someone with ADHD is shitting up this thread and equating male and female autism behaviors.

No. 1442994

>>1442988
learn what comorbid means and cope.

No. 1442997

>>1442989
autistic behaviors present based on environment, not gender.

No. 1443000

>>1442994
That’s my point. Are you sure you’re not also on the spectrum? Kek More people can use a thread with both because a good chunk of people have both asd and adhd, two threads doesn’t make sense. There’s also one anon flipping their shit every new thread.
Just be nice. You’re the one who needs a super special place just for you and has a problem. Don’t like the thread you’re welcome to hide it and not demand people cater to you.

No. 1443016

>>1443000
no? adhd is a learning disability while autism is a developmental disability, totally different things. comorbid means multiple diseases at the same time, the diseases themselves aren't related. dyslexia is also comorbid with autism and they're not related. people with adhd don't relate to autists at all, period. people only try to relate them so people with adhd can get disability benefits you're just falling for the meme.

No. 1443032

>>1442989
Some anons ITT do think ADHD is autism though and they're incorrect. I don't identify with autists at all and I have a relative who is high functioning.

>>1443000
Like anons have said, they're not related at all, overlapping symptoms isn't an indication of anything. Thousands of diseases and disorders have overlapping symptoms and aren't related and honestly the prevalent of ADHD diagnoses with autism sound more like incorrect overdiagnosis due to shared symptoms, despite symptoms not presenting in the same way. That or a genetic disposition in autists to be more likely to have learning disabilities on top of their autism. Either way, if borderline has it's own thread ADHD should as well, or atleast learning disorders, like ADHD and dyslexia. It's a different class of disorder entirely.

No. 1443050

>>1443016
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/is-adhd-a-learning-disability#is-it
>>According to most researchers and learning disability organizations, ADHD can affect learning, and many people with ADHDTrusted Source have other learning disabilities. However, because this condition does not influence specific aspects of education, such as the ability to understand language or the written word, doctors do not usually consider it a learning disorder.
https://www.verywellmind.com/is-adhd-a-learning-disability-4116126
>>Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is not a learning disability; however, it does make learning difficult
https://mangoclinic.com/is-adhd-a-learning-disability-or-a-behavioral-disability/
>> No, ADHD cannot be classified as a learning disability. While learning disabilities affect skills like reading or math, ADHD affects executive functions like the ability to control impulsive behaviors, emotions, and focus.
Cope harder

No. 1443060

>>1443050
ADHD is not the same class of disability as autism, sorry.

No. 1443072

>>1443060
Don't argue with autists. They're literally mentally disabled it makes no sense.

No. 1443081

>>1443060
You’re moving goalposts now kek. Seethe harder

No. 1443223

Autist nonnas, are special interests important for your functionality? Blog reason for asking: I've had serious brain illness that impairs daily life activity and my friend came over to help me do my special interest (it's a group game so hard to alone). It helped a lot, like I couldn't move very well and was spacey before we started, but by the end of the night cracked jokes and actually functioned like I used to. We've been playing more regularly over the last two days and it's helped. I'm also wondering if there's research into autistic special interests and whether there's recorded benefit in engaging them.

No. 1443259

>>1443223
Can’t speak for everyone, but cognitive wise I function a lot better when I can interact with my special interests regularly.

No. 1443674

File: 1670908089564.png (110.01 KB, 800x800, common-special-interests-autis…)

>>1443223
>>1443259
What’s the difference between autistic special interest and, well, regular interest/hobby
How do you know?

No. 1443716

>>1443223
Yes, I have autism and ADHD so my interests change often. The periods between when I don’t have an interest are very empty and alone feeling. I imagine this might be how NTs feel without social contact.

No. 1443717

>>1443674
>people

No. 1443724

>>1443223
I literally made my career out of my "special interest" so yeah pretty much that is the only thing that makes me even talk to people, be able to hold a job, and appear like a semi-functional adult to outsiders. My life would be shit if I couldn't engage in it.
>>1443674
The difference between a special interest and a normal hobby is supposed to be that a special interest is often more eccentric and specific, and autists tend to become abnormally invested in it. Ofc there would be some overlap with autistic special interests and just extremely obsessive or intense hobbies. Imo it's more handy when describing the behaviour of autistic children. I'd be surprised if a normal 8-years-old child had the hobby of memorizing the latin name and habitat of every pigeon species, or collecting faucets (irl examples).

No. 1443783

>>1443724
Nta people have tinfoiled I'm autistic and tried to diagnose me, but really while my interests were obsessive, they were very broad and learning things was the only thing my family allowed me to do. Playing and socializing was to them a waste of time. I think I was conditioned and gaslit into having some autistic behaviors. I don't know if that's possible.

No. 1443806

>>1441993
>You all do this too
No, I don't do that because I don't inherently feel the need to tell others about all of my thoughts, it's part of my autism. About once every month my boss is shocked to learn I'm a big fan of X band, this has been going on for 2 years now. Normal people do not actually remember small talk, they don't use it as an information exchange, it's just social bonding so the content doesn't matter to them. I don't always know when something should be considered small talk, so I remember it a lot more often than they do.

>>1443032
>they're not related at all
When something has a potential 80% overlap not seen in the rest of the population there is reason to suspect they are in fact somewhat related. Just because you hate people with adhd/autism doesn't make you immune to having one or both. If you have even one relative who is autistic or has adhd you've probably got the genes too. We're all on lc, we're all retards by default.

No. 1443816

>>1443674
The intensity of how much you enjoy and indulge in it. For autists it usually lasts "forever" or for very long periods, but like other anon said for people with adhd they can come in the form of hyper fixations that switch more often. I read in the Pixilocks thread recently (she's a typical self diagnosed autist) that she "forgot" to add a special interest to her "special interest sheet" she had posted prior. I'm sure she really liked that thing, but I can't imagine forgetting my special interest even exists.

My special interest got me to a top position of a career related to it without having the formal education for it and instead being self-taught from when I was a child. I got it based on skill.

No. 1444022

>>1443816
What is your special interest Nona?

No. 1444073

>>1443806
Where's the overlap? What do adhd and autism have in common? As a person with ADHD, from my perspective I have NOTHING in common with autistics at all. We don't have any significant symptoms in common and comorbidity is no higher for autism than anything else.

No. 1444074

Interacting with my special interests make me feel so happy and strange and emotional I just want to cry sometimes. I don't know what to do with the feelingsand sometimes I wish I could express them beyond "man, I love X so much!"

No. 1444080

>>1444073
And sorry for complaining I guess but I'd actually like to participate in a thread for women with ADHD but it's irritating that we have to share it with the "achsually autistics are better than normal people" crowd. Why can't autistics go share a thread with the personality disorders? They actually belong together.

No. 1444089

>>1442794
No, the normies now identify as adhd/autistic

No. 1444094

>>1444089
>>1443674
NOTHING!!! Everyone hyperfixates and has special interests now. Everyone has autism BUT OFCOURSE YOU CANT SAY EVERYONES A LITTLE AUTISTIC CAN YOU?

No. 1444098

>>1438835
Is it possible to be autistic and make eye contact and understand jokes but be autistic with other things, or maybe it's aspergers, or am I just demented in some other unidentifiable way?

No. 1444145

>>1444080
ntayrt if you want a thread for something just make it. you won't be arrested

No. 1444182

>>1444080
Please make a separate thread anon. I would also like to discuss this.

No. 1444205

>>1444080
Just post what you want and stop policing other people. Why do you need a super speshul place? No one is stopping you from posting about adhd. You’re the only mad at people posting.

No. 1445275

>>1443674
ayrt and late to the party. I don't. But playing the game with my friend helped me function better than any of my other hobbies did this week. I also haven't heard that non-autists improve with preferred activity in the same way that I experienced and other anons have written here. Even if we don't know the reasons why, observation makes it pretty obvious how autists and non-autists express our interests differently.
Sorry if this is infight, but I don't think your picrel is very good? I've never met an autistic person into "history" other than simplifying things to avoid a spergfest, but I've met lots of us into a specific time period or aspect of history (militaryfags, garbfags, re-enactors, scadians….) Most of our interests aren't that broad and listing categories while pretending they're an autistic person's singular interest seems disingenuous on the chartmaker's part. I hope this makes sense.

No. 1445941

>>1443223
I've never once talked in length about my special interests to anyone. I'm scared of physical backlash or revealing too much information regarding myself, so my body suddenly becomes tired and unable to construct a cohesive thought about why I like something. I believe it's an anxiety response because I've always been ashamed of my Autism. I've resorted to talking to people online about them. But that must not be the same. I made normie friends back in school without mentioning my interests to them once, but it resulted in me looking incredibly boring even to non-Autists and too much of an "NT watchdog" for Autists at my school. I'd love to see studies done about it too.

No. 1446084

I'm aware this might open a terrible can of worms here but I've heard this argument before, always from extremely high functioning and relatively financially successful autistic women, and it pisses me off.
Firstly, in what meaningful way is this bitch disabled? Sure, she's autistic but it doesn't seem to impede her life in any way. If anything it's garnered her a lot of TikTok/YouTube fame and subsequent wealth. When people talk about aborting disabled fetuses, they're talking about really profound disabilities that will wreck you emotionally and financially. They're not picturing some annoying rich girl who gets weird about certain noises and textures.
Secondly, I didn't even know they could detect autism in the womb. If they are able to, wouldn't it have to be pretty severe? Like to the degree it would majorly affect your cognition and ability to survive on your own? I don't think they'd be able to spot an aspie. So why the fuck is she butting in on this conversation, lumping herself in with all disabled people, when this would never in a million years even apply to her?
She's really caping hard for this Bartise clown as if his opposition is coming from a place of concern for disabled people when he's clearly just a misogynistic prolife moid. He specifically brought up the topic in front of her Catholic family, knowing full well they'd gang up on her for it.
Idc if you call me a eugenicist. If I find out the fetus has a severe disability (that includes severe autism) I'm aborting it. The world doesn't need more autistic kids anyway, especially ones with parents that aren't willing or qualified to put in the effort to raise a kid like that.
I have a feeling most anons on here would disagree with her, but I've heard several autistic women say the same thing so who knows. If I'm wrong and y'all really do all think like this then I agree with >>1444080 and think we should have separate threads because I don't wanna be lumped in with you if that's the case

No. 1446173

Is there really any benefit in telling someone they are very likely autistic? It's a man I know, he has a lot of conflicts at work because of how inflexible he is, says he can't understand or talk to people at all in his private life, has an interest in fixing old machines and takes everything literally, so you can't even joke around with him. When I ask him if he ever did or tried X, he replies with the exact fucking date of the event, down to the day, even if it was years ago. I once mentioned him how I had an autistic classmate who also remember every street name and date perfectly memorized, and he seemed to take offense to that, because he thinks it's like a thing unique to him. I know the base assumption should be that he's aware of it, but he really does seem to think very black and white, and refuses anything that doesn't fit with his preconception, like I couldn't convince him a man could study to be a nurse or pre-K teacher, because that just doesn't fit with how he sees men. But then again, I'm not sure if it'd change anything.

No. 1446184

>>1446173
I wouldn't bother, he will probably get offended.

No. 1446246

>>1440481
hey thanks anon this is very cool. As a neurodivergent person who has both I appreciate it very much.

No. 1446262

File: 1671063813219.png (311.69 KB, 465x474, 345433434.png)

Do people in this thread sometimes feel unable to use discord servers at all? I tried joining unofficial lolcow discord servers before with fun people in them but everyone seemed so normie like a /g/ thread personified that I immediately felt "that way" (idk how to descrive it, you know what I'm talking about though). It literally made me feel like going through high school again, with the normal but kind girls pitying me for being weird and me knowing I was too weird to socialize even through a screen.

No. 1446272

People really love autistic "eccentricities" until it's not entertaining for them anymore. When they are vague about emotion, speak in loaded ways and say what they don't mean they are angered when you take them at their word.

When you say what you mean and speak neutrally they find intent and attack where there isn't any. It's exhausting. I don't like dealing with other peoples emotions.

No. 1446283

>>1439805
>I genuinely believe there is some kind of mass hysteria/ tiktok induced psychosis relating to disorders. It is statistically impossible at the rate in which so many people online are claiming to be autistic
It is intentional, it is a chinese app. Not to be tinfoily but literally the chinese version of tiktok (the name they use for the app over there is douyin) always shows content of chinese people working and studying hard, trying to make society better in the front page. Meanwhile the west gets a weird algorithm that makes people get tics and stupid videos about people doing stupid shit.

No. 1446288

File: 1671064309125.jpg (32.82 KB, 958x960, 1663602450294.jpg)

Does anyone else have this thing where you can't hang with more than one person at a time, so group settings feel absolutely dreadful?

No. 1446327

hey nonas. Am I autistic? I know nobody here can diagnose me, but what do you think?

Disclaimer 1: sorry this is gonna be pretty blogposty and super long. Read it if you want.
Disclaimer 2: I feel like I'm younger than a lot of nonas here, at least the ones who say their age and are in their late 20's or early 30's. I'm in high-school. Totally old enough to be on here though. (and since this is the autist thread. I'll be display some etiquette and clarify that wasn't sarcasm) Anyways I just wanted to clear this up because my "diagnosis" was catalyzed by professionals at school noticing and intervening, and I didn't want to put out to the pasture for saying I'm in high-school.

My sister confided in me that when I was an adolescent my mom had concerns that I had autism but never investigated. What was investigated however, was my inattentiveness and constant stimming, and really poor executive function. This led to an ADHD diagnosis which everyone kind of expected and wasn't contested by anyone. My parents didn't really parent me. Super lenient, no structure, barely did crap for myself. I remember having to get knots cut out of my hair because I wouldn't do basic self-care like brushing my hair or bathing regularly unless explicitly asked to and my sister had to literally teach me how to shower right because for some reason I never picked it up. This was in late childhood, early adolescence. Not willing to go into depth about family because it's a long story, but I switched households and ended up living with my older brother and his wife, (who I call my sister-in-law, or just my sister) who are in their early thirties while I'm a teenager. They become my legal guardians, and are pretty parenting-savvy. Sister finally introduced structure (a lot) and the change was super stressful. At this point I had also been enrolled in 4 different schools within about a 1 and a half year period and moved between three towns. Responded very poorly to the new environment/change, had really inappropriate tantrums and difficult behavior like running away, screaming, hurting myself. When people got too close to me while having a meltdown I'd push them away. Shoved my sister once without knowing she was pregnant, and they kicked me back to my biological mother (which is super reasonable. The baby is fine and very healthy thankfully. Love my nephew.) However, my mom just isn't a good parent, or at the very least not for me, I never did well in the environment of her household. She's mentally unstable with very bad anger issues. Never showed affection well. Flash forward to now, my life is pretty messed up. Ever since I've lived with my mom things went downhill. The two following school years I moved into my mom's house I experienced grade retention in school. So I've literally been a senior for about three years. Was never due to academic struggles or intellectual disability: was evaluated for special education. and everyone agreed I actually learn very quickly, ended up being high IQ and my teachers agreed when I attend and apply myself that my performance surpasses expectations. The issue is I gradually became truant from school, especially since online was so easy to skip. On top of this I've been bounced between inpatient stays and emergency rooms because I get these elevated moods where I'm prone to self-harm and running away, the same ones I used to get when I lived with my brother and sister. Exacerbated by depression probably but psychiatrists realized this was also because of drastic and sudden mood changes, which were fixed after I got put on 10mg of aripiprazole. Left first inpatient stay with a diagnosis of "Bipolar Disorder Not Otherwise Specified" because I didn't have any other typical symptoms of BPD other than having short-term elevated moods. Whether or not I have it doesn't matter cause the meds helped. Started trying to integrate back into school after skipping forever. Struggled socially and still missed at most a week or two at a time before attending again. Saw the counselor after having an unexpected meltdown because the cafeteria was too overwhelming/stimulating, was also not the first time it happened, it happened before in an office where there were tons of inconsequential and barely noticeable noises but they were all overlapping and it was too much for me because I couldn't tune any out. The cafeteria is still super uncomfortable to this day, and they let me eat in the office for lunch. Based on my mannerisms(the way I talked, stimming, pacing around on my toes) my social struggles, as well as citing the stressful environment contributing to my avoidance of school my counselor thought I was autistic. Arranged for me to be tested for special education. School psychologist thinks I'm autistic, and found a lot of symptoms of it during my assessment that I didn't even know I have which has made me re-contextualize my whole childhood and mental health experience. I'm being referred to go to a partial-inpatient service by my psychiatrist to seek a diagnosis. I looked into the diagnosis process and according to the DSM-V I literally meet all the criteria perfectly. For the meantime I got an IEP and the special ed classroom helped drastically and I'm attending school everyday and getting things done(to an extent, it can still be a struggle to complete tasks.) I'm being taught with lots of organized structure as well as explicit sequential instructions, as well as being accommodated where needed like in English where abstract thinking is pretty hard for me and we constantly have to analyze abstract concepts. (I bring this up because I hear this can be difficult for some autistic people, too, which puts further credit to my school psychologists' suspicion that I'm autistic)

Sorry for the wall of text. Basically I think I might be autistic but skeptical because I feel too old for a diagnosis and though my symptoms have definitely been present since early childhood, they are more noticeable now.The fact that they were less noticeable as a kid makes me feel like there's a change I might not have autism, since one of the tenets of the diagnosis are consistent and historic behaviors, which is harder to measure when said behaviors were not as noticeable meaning symptoms were LESS severe as a child. What I've rationalized anyways from my experience: I think that my ADHD and Bipolar-NOS was a misdiagnosis of autism symptoms that were painted as something else, because I masked well enough, so nobody really suspected autism. Skeptical because I feel like my sensory issues gradually got worse as I aged, which isn't supposed to happen I think. I'm pretty sure sensory sensitivities caused by autism are consistent in severity from birth. They all got worse after I experienced all those changes in my life with family and school and towns. So my other rationalization which may or may not be true, is that because of the increased social demands of high-school, stress and "autistic burnout" has made my symptoms and general maladjustment caused by them much more noticeable, prompting such a late diagnosis. Can someone please tell me if they're diagnosed but had more severe symptoms later in life so I know whether it's possible or not for the two to not be mutually exclusive? Also anyone who had been misdiagnosed before finding out they were autistic, hearing your experience would be very interesting and helpful. And another thing I'd be interested in hearing about is any autistic nonas being medicated and whether or not it helps. I am on medicine from my bipolar and ADHD diagnosis but they're still helpful to me…

No. 1446335

>>1446262
I can only use servers with very specific set topic channels, so there is no need to try and fit into a general conversation. a bit like on here, really. if people are talking about their normie lives, i just ignore it kek.

No. 1446505

File: 1671077705899.jpg (44.49 KB, 520x390, owlwarningsign.jpg)

>>1446262
I loathe Discord and refuse to use it under any circumstances, which has probably contributed to me not having a wider friend group or even contacts. Oh well! No regrets in the least.

No. 1446509

>>1446288
yes nona i get exhausted even talking to more than one person online

No. 1446664

>>1446327
>hey nonas. Am I autistic?
probably, get tested

No. 1446670

>>1446505
>I loathe Discord and refuse to use it under any circumstances,
understandable. people only go on discord to get groomed. i'm 31 and i still stay away, just in case

No. 1446691

the op image is a bit retarded since it can describe literally everyone, even neurotypicals.
Ive known more neurotypicals like that in the picrel than autistic people.

No. 1446695

>>1446272
you're right and i hate it. people love the "quirky" guy or girl who's probably autistic until they realize it can be hard to communicate with them normally or that they have more things than just their "odd" traits aka an actual personality. I don't even know if I'm an autist but I hate that people read between the lines where there is nothing. It is exhausting. do not project weird thoughts or gossip onto me thanks.
>>1446288
group stuff feels like such a scam for time because everyone always has their favorite friend or coworker there. then due to having a hard time communicating normally with small talk it is even harder when multiple conversations are going on.

No. 1446727

>>1446695
>people love the quirky guy or girl
Man I wish. I was bullied so hard for being different growing up, the only people who that works for are neurotypical men and hot girls.

No. 1446776

>>1446670
Discord is so ugly but it's a useful app if you use it as a glorified group chat and don't join random people's servers

No. 1446830

>>1446283
>Not to be tinfoily but literally the chinese version of tiktok (the name they use for the app over there is douyin) always shows content of chinese people working and studying hard, trying to make society better in the front page.
I would genuinely like to see if this works in the west to motivate people to study and work. Not to become perfect little salary slaves, but nowadays kids have shit attention spans and are getting "dumber" as a result and it would be nice to reverse the trend. Generally what affects how much you learn/your grades is how much your peers do it. So if you see others study/work it might actually help?

No. 1446856

File: 1671113502285.gif (1.82 MB, 275x275, 1660786777458.gif)

>>1446262
>>1446776
the way I see those discord groups is: it feels as if you're forced to socialize with people who aren't even your friends to begin with (even if you have things in common) and put up a nice face for them and god forbid you say the wrong thing or act weird. There's always the popular users too that always demand attention and it's just a mess. I always feel like I'm walking on eggshells on those social situations. I also dislike being ignored and feeling like an outcast in general, so I avoid it. Discord servers and any chat room in general feels like a chore, I want to be happy, chill, and calm by myself on my days off so joining a discord server where people talk 24/7 about their own personal lives and strong opinions is exhausting. It's like a chore. Like going to work and having to listen to your coworkers. I always end up feeling this even if people in the server are nice. Reminds me of school way too much or those parties your friend invites you to that you didn't want to go to begin with. My social battery is just too low and even if I can mask pretty well and be 'normal' and 'socialize' it all just feels like I'm doing it for nothing. I never have fun. I never care too much. I hate lying to myself. I hate having to put on a facade so people don't think I'm strange, specially in my very precious free time. Even if the people in the server are cool and based and kind etc it's just not for me. This type of thing has never been for me. It does give me some guilt, but being neurodivergent reminds me I also have my own needs.

It's even worse when the people in the group don't understand this and think it's just a matter of "joining in the fun" and "just speaking to others". It's overwhelming. I like keeping things to myself, I like being private, I like being by myself. I don't like being asked annoying personal questions, specially not in the middle of a chat room. I've been put on blast before by people who simply don't understand I don't want to share my life both IRL and online because people simply don't. get. it. And then they say "well you were the one talking in the first place" completely ignoring the fact they were the one who cornered me into replying to them. They never understand. They always want some juicy gossip from the weird outsider girl, whatever. I bet they all talk shit about me on their DMs and speculate shit just like people at school did. And then they dress it up as 'concern'. It feels violating to me because I'm already someone with trust issues that takes her time to really open up and I am not super talkative that easily unless I feel reassured that I can talk (or 'sperg out' if you will). It's so obvious when people are just pulling up with you instead of being interested in what you say too. I'm tired.

Social situations are just a hassle, everyone wants their time to shine and I can't keep up. Paying attention all the time to everything everyone says is overwhelming. This happens even when I only keep myself to a few channels, it's not how many I can take, it's the fact I don't want to 'take' any of them. It's easier to just sense the mood of 1 person when they talk to you vs not knowing how more than 3 people at the same time will react to what you said.

So yeah I would only keep discord to talk to people who are already your friends, people who actually love and cherish the real you and not just the socialized version of yourself. And I would only keep it on DMs too.

Any thoughts nonnies?

No. 1446862

>>1446856
I'm the admin of a server with 150~ members and almost no one speaks. We only share articles, books, movies that we like. At first, I was afraid people were bored but apparently everyone loves it because there is no drama. You aren't alone. I left every server I was in but this one and another one who is more like a group chat. It's so much more bearable. Being ignored and having to force yourself to interact with popular users in a certain way is so annoying. You are so right, it's like school and I don't want that in my life.

No. 1446967

>>1446262
Yeah, the all female server I'm in is just normies that talk about school or work, rarely hobbies and interests so as an autist it really irks me because that's my main topic to talk about.

No. 1446974

>>1446262
Yeah I basically become the serving whipping girl with a few people being nice to me out of pity. Even if I try and mildly succeed and get some convo flow going with somebody it's like I give off vibes that make certain users want to be mean to me and tear me down. I had to leave and honestly I don't think I'll join another

No. 1448950

Does anyone else struggle with watching movies and tv shows because they struggle with morality when it comes to personal conflict? I'm specifically talking about characters who breaks the "girls code" or "guy code". I'm currently watching a show where a guy starts sleeping with his best friend's ex and everyone treats it has an awful thing. I know that this is a bad thing to do but at the same time I just find the concept of "owning" a person and a crush becoming off-limits weird. Same with storylines that involves someone pursuing their best friend's crush. These types of storylines are so common in TV shows and I always fail to root for the right characters
I luckily have never been in a situation like this irl. Personally I feel like if my best friend started dating my crush I would be heartbroken but I would also feel like an asshole if I told her to stop dating him because both my crush and my friend can't help who they fell in love with. It just feels entitled to say a person is off-limits

No. 1449035

Kind of really wanna make an "Autism (ASD) thread #1" as in the first ASD thread that is separated from ADHD. I think nonas who have either autism or ADHD would benefit from this equally by having separated threads. The discussion can be more fine-tuned and organized to fit the needs of the user. I know there was infighting earlier in this thread over this and even though it was kinda petty I still agree that the two should be separate.

1. nonas, do you agree they should be separate?
2. am I even allowed to do this if there's already a thread like this lol

No. 1449101

>>1448950
>I always fail to root for the right characters
can definitely relate to this. both the personal situation (totally agree with you on that) and the conflict of following media who push a "correct" moral code that you don't necessarily subscribe to. one that came to mind recently was when I watched The Devil Wears Prada and everyone started hating on Hathaway's character for being selfish because she was too busy with her new job. I thought her boyfriend and friends were assholes for not cutting her some slack in her stressful new job. But she has to grovel to make it up to them, even though she is dealing with so much pressure already.

Also, the kind that really winds me up is when the main villain character, or the one we're meant to hate, is a person who keeps themselves to themselves, doesn't join in on all the "fun" and is kind of "weird" so everyone is justified in hating this character, because these things make them evil. and then - even worse - when the character has a redemption arc and suddenly changes their entire personality, becoming a stupid, joyous, brainless moron like the rest of the characters and only then are they accepted.

No. 1449107

>>1449035
If it bothers people so much then just do it. We've already spoken about ASD a lot in this thread though, not seen much discussion about ADHD so maybe that should be the new one.

No. 1449116

>>1449101
I think a lot of people these days do think Anne’s bf is the real villain of the film for not supporting Anne. Her friends aren’t great either.

It’s ok to have your own opinion of these things, even if it goes against what everyone else is feeling. A good movie/book/etc can be read many ways by different people.

No. 1449129

>>1449116
it's just the way some media frames it in a forceful way sometimes. I know things are open to interpretation otherwise and don't have a problem with that.

good to know about the Devil Wears Prada thing. it seems so obvious that the boyfriend is manipulative when you watch it back. yet he is framed as the victim that she needs to win back with a personal sacrifice. bleurgh.

No. 1449135

After having multiple mental health professionals tell me they think I'm autistic, I've been researching it a lot. It makes sense. There's something I'm concerned about, though… I've been reading experiences of self-diagnosed adults with ASD going through the official diagnosis process and they all seem to share something, that even I relate to, and I think it provides a conflict of interest in terms of actually getting diagnosed. A lot of them say "I'm scared that when I see the psychiatrist, they'll screen me and tell me that I don't have it. I won't come across as 'autistic enough.'" This boggles me. Why are people scared to not be autistic? Shouldn't you be relieved, even? What I think it is: some people get so tunnel-vision in self-diagnosis. Difficulty making friends? *Impaired social communication
skills Clumsy? Motor planning deficit Poor handwriting? Problems with fine motor coordination* Massive
stamp/coin/doll/baseball card/lego collections? Abnormally intense interests Not a hugger? Tactile defensiveness. It becomes an explanation for everything, to a point where I think it becomes hard to accept that it is anything other than autism. It has to be autism. And at this point I think a lot of people struggle to take anything else for an answer. I think it's kind of about seeking validation, that you have a valid reason to have all these idiosyncrasies and struggles. That you're not just weird or mentally broken, that it's not your fault. At this point, are you seeking diagnosis to make yourself feel better? Do you genuinely think you have autism and need accommodations or do you just want to have it to rationalize your own behavioral patterns? I've started wondering if I've fallen into this trap too. Have any other nonas noticed this phenomenon and felt it themselves? And again, why do you think someone would be scared to "fail" their autism diagnosis/screening?

No. 1449138

>>1449101
>a person who keeps themselves to themselves, doesn't join in on all the "fun" and is kind of "weird" so everyone is justified in hating this character
I hate reading about people’s real life encounters with celebrities as most of them are something like “she was so friendly and we chatted for ages” or “I worked on a set with her and she went into her trailer after filming while everyone else sat around chatting. So stuck up”.

People are so entitled to other people’s time and energy, even if you aren’t famous. Hairdressers are the worst. You pay them for a service and then you are also expected to provide an hour’s entertainment on top. I had one get huffy at my for working on my phone during the appointment.

No. 1449150

>>1449129
You have to consider that tDWP is not exactly high media and the themes and plot probably weren’t properly developed, especially for the film (though the book isn’t great either). It’s meant to entertain and make money but not hold up to much scrutiny.

No. 1449155

>>1449135
I think there is a lot of vulnerability on show when you go for an adult diagnosis. You have to admit a lot of things you have been covering up, how badly people have treated you, things you have struggled with, and do this to multiple people, sometimes ones close to you. Imagine opening yourself up like that and then being told that you haven’t been doing things “wrong” for reasons beyond your control but because you are just “weird” like all the bullies told you before. There’s also a longing to finally get an answer so you can get help and forgive yourself and move on.

No. 1449157

>>1449138
Absolutely. it's one of my biggest pet peeves. the person who fits that description must be deliberately being mean, snobby, stuck up, rude etc. and never "this person likes their own space, this person likes quiet, this person is tired or this person has boundaries." I do get called cold and stuck up, for simply doing my own thing sometimes. People are so self-centered and demanding of attention that anything short of 100% focus on them is considered an affront.
>Hairdressers are the worst
One of the many, many, many reasons I don't go to the hairdressers is the constant chat that is expected (along with the noise, smells, expense and potential for them changing your hair too much).

No. 1449249

>>1449035
I have both, I like the term neurodivergent, I don't mind people talking about x or y here. This website is so slow already idk why split it.

No. 1449264

File: 1671246442371.png (1.33 MB, 610x932, fuck.png)

>>1449150
I like devil wears praga but feel like it's a product of its time, the early 2000s. Sure isn't high art but it's entretaining.

>>1449101
>is a person who keeps themselves to themselves, doesn't join in on all the "fun" and is kind of "weird" so everyone is justified in hating this character, because these things make them evil. and then - even worse - when the character has a redemption arc and suddenly changes their entire personality, becoming a stupid, joyous, brainless moron like the rest of the characters and only then are they accepted.
God I hate this fucking trope so fucking much and the fact that it happens to tomboyish or gnc women in media, or women who are bookworms or really quiet/shy, makes me SUPER angry. It's such a cheap storytelling resource and such a bad outdated joke. They also only do it so the extroverted neurotypicals don't feel bad for laughing at us even more and gives them a free pass to become even more pushy. Sometimes I even feel it must be government propaganda so everyone consumes more alcohol and has sex or some shit idk. NOT EVERYONE has to change into a social butterfly that wears hyper feminine dresses, in fact most of us would hate to be changed. I was memed into this and now I regret it so much. I hate when people are so pushy because "omg but your life is sooooo boringgggg you're losing the best years of your life to being inside" etc. Fucking assholes. At least nowadays with the stupid tiktok """""autism""""" and """"adhd"""" trend people are starting to wake up and realize we all have different brains and different needs even if you're not neurodivergent and just antisocial or introverted.

No. 1449283

>>1446262
Most discord servers probably have a clique/in group, if you join after the clique gets formed you will always feel like an outsider. It’s something many many people complain about.

No. 1449291

>>1449135
> I'm scared that when I see the psychiatrist, they'll screen me and tell me that I don't have it. I won't come across as 'autistic enough.'" This boggles me. Why are people scared to not be autistic? Shouldn't you be relieved, even?
Because then your weirdness isn’t explained. It’s nice to have all your struggles neatly explained by a word. You feel validated in being weird.

No. 1449300

>>1449035
Yes, please. There's so many autistics that discussion of ADHD is always drowned out.
By the way who else is out of adderall? I called my doctor to ask for an alternative and the fucking nurse wouldn't listen to me and talked over me to tell me to keep calling pharmacies. How far out of town am I supposed to look??

No. 1449301

>>1449264
It’s kind of interesting to think that people these days are more aware of ableism when it comes to physical issues but not other aspects (unless it’s ~depression~). For example, no one is going to write a Richard III type play where the bad guy has a physical deformity but people seem fine giving villains social “deformities” such as being a loner. I know murders etc are more likely to be loners but not all loners are murderers.

I saw people today complaining about Elon saying he has a monotone voice and no friends. I don’t like Elon and I’m not trying to defend him but he’s open about having autism and so people mocking him for his symptoms seems like ableism. No one seems to notice that though.

No. 1449308

>>1449301
He doesn't have autism, he's just a grifter who came from a lot of money

No. 1449311

>>1449308
What? He very obviously has autism.

No. 1449313

>>1449300 YES DUDE No clue where you are but I've heard pharmaceuticals have stopped providing adderall to pharmacies AKA there's been a huge problem with suppliers. So a lot of people I think aren't getting it. Try asking for generic that's what I did because when they finally got something that's all they had. Idk what's wrong with the manufacturers, I'm on the east coast of USA.

No. 1449334

>>1449308
you can own an emerald mine with slaves and still have autism, it's not mutually exclusive kek. I hate Elon but autism isn't class exclusive

No. 1449380

>>1446084
They’ll scream about this but then do absolutely nothing to help out the profoundly disabled. No volunteer work, no care work, no donating to charity. They refuse to have a full understanding of the condition. They wouldn't last five minutes coping with a severely autistic person and they fucking know it. I’ve also noticed people with Down’s syndrome campaigning to make later term abortions for foetuses with downs illegal and it’s just…crazy to me. What fucking business of yours is it what goes on in other peoples uteruses? Sorry you have to take it so personally but most of you are helpless drooling potatoes, why on earth would you want to subject other people to that? You never hear people with cystic fibrosis etc doing it. They’re all for eugenics to stop people being born with the condition. But when it falls under the retard umbrella, it’s suddenly a magical condition. Like good for you that you’re too fucking mentally impaired to understand the impact your condition has on the people around you, and congrats that they all work hard to shield you from it, but pull your head out of your fucking arse and look around you for once.

No. 1449389

>>1449380
I can’t believe in this day and age people with bad genes are still knowingly having children. I don’t think there should be forced abortions or anything like that but people with bad genes will likely have first hand experience already of how someone living with those conditions suffers through a family member. Anyone who purposely has children like this is awful.

No. 1449397

File: 1671256844463.jpg (8.57 KB, 225x225, unnamed.jpg)

>>1449389
>I can’t believe in this day and age people with bad genes are still knowingly having children.
tell that to Elon Musk kek

>Billionaires Like Elon Musk Want to Save Civilization By Having Tons of Genetically Superior Kids.

https://longreads.com/2022/11/17/billionaires-like-elon-musk-want-to-save-civilization-by-having-tons-of-genetically-superior-kids/
Mind you he has like 1 or 2 autistic sons, one abomination with grimes (poor kid tbh), and another one who is a tranny

No. 1449421

>>1449397
He needs to be sterilised already. Even people with ok genes should be limited to 2 per couple, 1 for singles.

No. 1449422

>>1449397
>another one who is a tranny
probably on the spectrum as well

No. 1449590

>>1449380
This. This so fucking much. Also needless to say it's always the mothers who are expected to waste away their lives, giving up their dreams to care for the retarded.

No. 1449597

Not related but the threadpic just makes me think of nlog millennial women who live by ‘normal people scare me’, brags about being a morticia in a world of blonde beckies and has a septum piercing.

No. 1449863

>>1443223
100% yes. I enter a kind of flow state when I engage with my special interest and I think it's probably the only way I can regulate my nervous system. If I don't do it for a minimum of a few hours a day I notice I start stimming and dissociating in a really disruptive way.

No. 1449908

>>1449313
I think I usually do take the generic version anyway but no one seems to have it. I don't want to call pharmacies anymore. They keep putting me on hold and I put them on speaker and then I put my phone down and forget that I'm on the call. It's so fucking embarrassing.

No. 1449934

>>1449590
I feel like some profound autistics are so devoid of feeling or seeing outside of their own basic needs that it doesn’t even make a difference to them if it’s their mother wiping their ass and being smacked and bitten or a paid care worker.

No. 1449940

File: 1671291385721.gif (812.35 KB, 400x250, F9BAB142-E938-4FE8-8163-BFFB68…)

>>1449597
Ok Becky, stop scaring us why don’t you?

No. 1449943


No. 1450037

File: 1671297013981.gif (516.04 KB, 221x231, 913.gif)

Does anyone else feel super insanely angry when other people tell you what to do with your life?

Context: I'm a neet but I don't plan to stay a neet forever, I just want to do art as my livehood. It's all I live for and all I want.

I just want to be left alone and work from home and I know things will take time so I'm not rushing myself because I hate the stress and can't handle it very well without exploding on people. If people in my life didn't make me feel like shit for not having a soul sucking retail job instead of focusing on the only thing that makes me happy, then I would feel as happy as I can be. But there's a moid in my life that I love very much that happens to be also autistic who keeps pushing the idea that I NEED a job that I don't want in the the first place and losing my patience and my time to it is the way to go. But I simply don't want to. He's micromanaging me and acting like a parent even THOUGH he works at home and does animation as a job. What the hell can I do so he leaves me the fuck alone? Whenever it comes to his autism I always, ALWAYS let him be by himself and try to be understanding. I wish he wasn't as stubborn as he is.

No. 1450042

>>1446862
that sounds cool, how do you find servers like that?

No. 1450045

>>1450037
>I just want to do art as my livehood. It's all I live for and all I want
this is probably why people keep telling you to get a "normal" job. you won't make shit from your art unless you've already got a large following, don't rely on an art career to keep you afloat unless you already have a good network

No. 1450047

>>1450037
Maybe he's stressed because of money? Since it comes across like he's the one keeping both of you alive

No. 1450054

>>1450037
Is it possible that it's coming from a place of concern? It's a little worrying when a loved one does not have a way to take care of themselves on their own. Having a shitty part time job is a normal thing to do while you're working on your creative stuff until you can support yourself with it.

No. 1450062

>>1450037
your bf might be right tbh. sounds like you might be dependent on him money wise. with a regular job you'll be able to support yourself if something goes wrong with your relationship. you can continue pursuing art but regular income is a must.

No. 1450094

>>1450062
>>1450047
I don't live with him tho
>>1450045
>got a large following
Nah, trust me it's not always how it works, not in the industry I want to get into anyway. I just need to capitalize on it.

No. 1450098

>>1450094
also before I get shit for it, the art thing I'm aiming for has to do with other things that don't involve fandom commissions, so a large following is indifferent to me. I just need to organize myself is all, but with me wasting my time on random jobs I haven't been able to fully.

No. 1450164

>>1450094
This depends on how disabled you are. If you're capable of supporting yourself then someone who loves you would encourage you to do that. It depends on your situation but normally the longer you spend as a NEET the harder it is to get out of it and the worse your life prospects are.

No. 1450304

File: 1671310097487.gif (944.07 KB, 500x311, grumpy-cat-2500593820.gif)

>>1446262
>>1446856
I found this discord server which is sort of inactive but otherwise neat. Everyone there seems to have the same approach to fandom as me and there isn't a vent channel or something equally as stupid but I still have a hard time making any friendships there
>it feels as if you're forced to socialize with people who aren't even your friends to begin with
that's how it feels for me too. There are the popular users in the group but they are already friends and already have their own inside jokes. I know that they already have their own private discord where they discuss this niche fandom so that's why this server is inactive because everyone already has their clique.
Also to fully understand the discussion happening in the server you need to follow the bigshot users twitter and tumblr to get the full context of what they are talking about. but their twitters and tumblrs is just them talking to their close friends so it's not fun following them either. So I can't use discord for niche fandoms can't use twitter or tumblr either.
>I bet they all talk shit about me on their DMs and speculate shit just like people at school did.
Same here. I just suck at talking with people so I always come off as weird in the servers I'm in. I know people are discussing in the DMs whenever I say something awkward or come of as too cold or come off as too friendly. I hate it so much I'm trying my best to make friends in my niche fandom but at the end of the day im just too off putting and weird

No. 1450323

hey nonna I know you don't want to hear a bunch of people telling you to get a job, but I get where you're coming from and don't blame you. I was NEET for the past two years until a couple of months ago (for reasons, I won't get into it). Then I got a job at a crafts/art supply store, and now I have a nice little employee discount on art supplies. Maybe you'd actually kind of enjoy something similar? It could be good for you, even if you're just doing short shifts a couple days out of the week.

No. 1450332

>>1450037
if you think you're too special for a regular job i feel no sympathy for what happens to you. when you say youre taking your time you tell on yourself that you dont think starting your actual adult life is a priority

No. 1450347

>>1450037
I've been a NEET for a long time and don't see anything wrong with being a NEET if you have a plan to take care of yourself but it also isn't that big a criticism to suggest your bf isn't totally in the wrong for thinking you should get a job. Depending on your circumstances it might be a good idea.
>>1450332
You're in the autism thread retard.

No. 1450356

>>1450037
Just come to the neet thread anon kek. I don't know if I'm autistic, but I'm in a similar situation to yours and I know it can be difficult. I was high functioning when I was a teen but had a traumatic burnout/breakdown eventually and now I'm a neet focusing on art. I have a very low regular income, but since it's a ridiculous thing I don't tell people I do art, not even my family, so strangers often feel the need to recommend me jobs without fully knowing my issues, what I went through or what I plan to do. So just ignore it anon. What's important is that slowly you're working towards something that will make you as "normal" and idependent as possible and doesn't make you suffer too much.

No. 1450358

>>1450347
>You're in the autism thread retard
and? get a job lmao

No. 1450368


No. 1450374

>>1450358
Not all autistics can hold down a "regular job". If you have some kind of tiktok autism that doesn't affect your level of functioning then why are you even here?

No. 1450384

>>1450358
Imagine calling yourself autistic but not qualifying for disabilitybux.

No. 1450642

>>1450037
If I’m understanding correctly, the problem is him being a control freak? Assuming you are financially independent from him and this is him literally just deciding what he thinks is best for you, then he sounds a lot like my ex who was also autistic. Honestly, I found it impossible to get him to stop micromanaging me and insisting on what I should do all the time. In my case, I couldn't do anything right. Hopefully your boyfriend is a lot nicer in other ways though. You need to put your foot down and tell him to stop and maybe reassure him that this is your plan and why you are content with it. He doesn't have to fully understand or agree with it but he does have to accept it. It's not for him to decide.

If you actually do need some more money and structure too, then you might benefit from what I do which is working part time WFH job (that’s all I can manage with my health issues) and then work on my hobby job whenever I can. It brings in some money but isn’t consistent, but at least the part time job is my safety net for bills. I did work retail in my teens/early twenties and do not recommend it. Burnt me out.

No. 1450707

File: 1671332469693.png (245.04 KB, 720x720, 1663564535125.png)

>>1450323
hey thanks for this reply, I think I will consider this and check what craft stores I have available in my area. Thanks sweet anon, I also have my reasons why I am a NEET currently it's more than just having autism, I am very happy for your post and I appreciate it a lotl

>>1450332
>if you think you're too special for a regular job
Never said I was too special for one KEK, I simply said I can't take stress too well hence why I feel retail to be soul sucking… even neurotypicals think this lmao
>i feel no sympathy for what happens to you
thanks no one asked for your sympathy

>>1450356
>I was high functioning when I was a teen but had a traumatic burnout/breakdown eventually and now I'm a neet focusing on art.
This is exactly what I'm going through, I finished college (barely) not too long ago and I've been burnt out ever since, there's some other mental and emotional issues I have to deal with and I'm just taking it easy. It wasn't until last year that I was diagnosed.
>So just ignore it anon. What's important is that slowly you're working towards something that will make you as "normal" and idependent as possible and doesn't make you suffer too much.
Thank you very very much for being understanding, it's not that I don't want to work. It's just that things are difficult in my mind atm. I was always a hard worker since I was a kid, always waking up at 5am to go to school, always giving out more than necessary because I would hyperfixate on studying. It's only now that I am finally resting but even resting is stressful when no one in your life understands it. I want to do art.

>>1450642
>Honestly, I found it impossible to get him to stop micromanaging me and insisting on what I should do all the time. In my case, I couldn't do anything right. Hopefully your boyfriend is a lot nicer in other ways though. You need to put your foot down and tell him to stop and maybe reassure him that this is your plan and why you are content with it. He doesn't have to fully understand or agree with it but he does have to accept it. It's not for him to decide.
That's exactly the issue… him micromanaging everything for me. I never even asked lol he's just like "alright do this". I have reassured him many times about what my plans are and why I'm taking it easy. I don't want to take it easy forever, I'm actually building up so I start immediately focusing on things better this january. I also am off meds (cant get them where I live) and my adhd makes me distracted. Idk what I'm saying anymore, but thank you for also being nice anon

No. 1450807

>>1450037
Fuck everyone else anon, I’m glad to see you following what you want. No one is going to look back on their life and wished they did more retail work and less art. Not to mention that those types of jobs are not suitable for most autists.

I wasted most of my 20s following what other people wanted for me and trying to support myself with stressful and abusive jobs. Still trying to claw my way out of that. I wish I had taken some time out to decide what I wanted and then worked towards that instead.

The only thing I would say is to make sure you stay motivated and actually make progress, though it sounds like you have a clear goal in mind.

No. 1450811

>>1450807
your poor parents cant quit their jobs to do art though or you'd starve

No. 1450815

>>1450811
Nice try. We’ve been NC for 5 years.

No. 1450828

>>1450815
I wonder why

No. 1450832

>>1450828
Because they were abusive and forcing me to do things I did not want and that got me nowhere. I cut contact with them, not the other way around.

No. 1450834

>>1450832
You cut contact with them because you're a lazy entitled autist who thinks being realistic to the reality of the world is your parents being "abusive" when they were probably trying to help you. Most people, even some seasoned artists can't live off their art their entire life. Get a job.

No. 1450843

>>1450834
Wtf anon. I don’t want to me-rail this thread with explanation after explanation but that’s not the situation at all.

No. 1450880

>>1450834
>projection
sounds like you have some regrets

No. 1450883

>>1450834
Not even an autist but what the hell are you doing itt?

No. 1450884

File: 1671350101568.jpg (14.11 KB, 224x225, images.jpg)

>>1450834
nonnies who are leeching off their parents wont like this one

No. 1450900

>>1450884
Gregor's parents were the ones leeching off him, refusing to help him and injuring him even after he becomes a monster as a consequence working a soul sucking job to support his family and pay off their debt.

No. 1450903

>>1450832
question, how do you support yourself then or are you the like the thirteenth NEET wife/gf on lc

No. 1450911

>>1450900
he deserved it. cockroaches are disgusting

No. 1450936

>>1450834
>NOOO YOU HAVE TO BE AS MISERABLE AS ME
kek seething narc detected

No. 1450939

And of course it's a moid,lol. Damaged xy devoid of emotional dept is shining brightly once again.

No. 1450942

>>1450903
NTA but can you even fucking read? She already said she doesn’t live with the boyfriend. You’re aware people can work jobs they find draining and detrimental for short times while making long term plans. She literally said the other jobs are keeping her from being organized. Sorry your self hatred makes you fucking unable to read.

No. 1450947

>>1450811
>>1450834
KEKKK the absolute narc rage and projection, keep being slaved the current abusive socio economic environment then. Not everyone has to be the same as you, chill out bitch.
>even some seasoned artists can't live off their art their entire life.
Sorry that you are so narrow minded and poisoned by the artfag thread that you think this is in any case true kek

No. 1450952

>>1450834
>NARC
You all sound simultaneously like triggered tumblrfags who cry ableism at the prospect of work and unwashed basement dwellers who live off their parents and call people "wagie"

No. 1450953

File: 1671357226275.jpeg (121.53 KB, 1024x682, 07A1F81D-3BDB-4A6F-B4C5-455BA7…)

>>1450952
>>T-this will show them!!

No. 1450958

>>1450953
KEKK nooo he looks so sad

No. 1450961

>>1450953
Nice clown pic? kek

No. 1450987

>>1450952
cry more. Enough negativity in this freaking website. Go mind your own business.

No. 1450994

>>1450903
I’m not the art anon but I’m now able get professional level work out of a hobby. It pays well but it’s not what I would have chosen to have done if I’d had supportive parents. I’m still working on carving out a career of what I really want.

No. 1451075

>>1450952
That anon literally said they don't even have contact to their parents anymore. But go on, post some more incel wojaks, seething moid.

No. 1451131

>>1451075
I wasn't talking about that anon but the replies dumbass. Will you lot stop calling everyone a moid who says anything that pisses you off? I'm literally an autistic girl, why the fuck else would I be in this thread kek. I just hate when other autists use autism as an excuse to be lazy leeches who contribute nothing to society and perpetuate the stereotype of us being too retarded to do anything useful.

No. 1451152

>>1451131
I'm sure no one noticing you had autism until you discovered it on tiktok in your 20s was really hard on you, but that's not everyone's experience of autism and for some people it actually affects their level of functioning.

No. 1451191

>>1451152
Do you really think all autists are lazy slobs like you? Kek, how insulting. Autism is not a mental impairment that magically prevents you from working, you sound fucking pathetic and "spoons" aren't real no matter how many times tumblr told you they were.

No. 1451228

>>1451191
No, I don't think all people with autism have the same level of functioning because I'm not mentally retarded. It's not a contentious point that some people with autism can't work kek. I hope you're happy that you baited me moid troll.

No. 1451374

some people are neets, some are not

no1currrr

No. 1451758

>>1451191
Autism is a disability. The fuck are you on about?

No. 1451904

File: 1671396256533.gif (429.37 KB, 275x207, m-5.gif)

I'm not sure if this is common amongst autists since it isn't a diagnosis criteria but I reeeeally struggle with spelling. I suspect that it's due to my autism diagnosis since I have been tested for dyslexia before but I have no trouble with reading and reading comprehension. But I can't spell and I have trouble with wording sentences in writing which did worry a bunch of my teachers growing up. It's also just embarrassing not being able to spell as an adult. Whenever I have to share my notes with my studygroup it's full of spelling errors and they laugh at it. I specially struggle with spelling names (both first and surnames) and people always gets mad when I spell their names wrong. Not that I blame them but it's just frustrating

No. 1451921

>>1451904
can I ask, do you know the spelling of things but still make mistakes? Like if I pointed out a mistake you made, would you wonder why you made the mistake or is it that you just don't know how to spell things generally?
Because I have problems with spelling, wording and general errors but it includes things I know usually. I just get muddled and mixed up a lot. I make a lot of silly errors generally and I'm sure people think I'm a fucking idiot for it. Not sure if it's related to autism though. Would be interested to see if other people relate to it.

>people always get mad when i spell their names wrong

I get this a lot too. People are so uppity about their name spellings. I have a name that people always spell wrong because it's different to the common spelling and I don't take it personally. It's only an issue when it's for official documentation, really.

No. 1451925

>>1451921
I just can't spell in general. Often when <i write I will try writing the same word several times because I just can't figure out how to spell it and autocorrect isn't helping because the way I spell words is so fucked up that it can't recognise it. So I spend a lot of time googling words just to make sure I spelled it correctly. Weirdly enough I have no trouble recognising words when I read them but it's just I can't make sense of letters when I have to write them myself

No. 1452174

>>1451904
I’ve always been bad a spelling. Not so bad that’s it obvious something is wrong but my spelling abilities were always lower than everything else at school at it was embarrassing.

I also have this thing where if I’m writing under pressure, such as in an exam, I will not write the word I want but a word that rhymes and not know it. For example, I will want to write “sleep” but I will write “deep” instead and be completely oblivious to what I have done. I mentioned this in my ADHD assessment but I can’t remember the context.

I don’t do that when typing, but sometimes I miss out words when typing and don’t realise.

I also have some dispraxic tendencies (slow reactions, weak, clumsy) but not enough for anyone to suggest I have to see a doctor. I guess once when you’re on the spectrum you can have parts of them all.

No. 1452677

>>1451904
>I suspect that it's due to my autism diagnosis
It's not the autism, all autists I know are particularly annoying with spelling and phrasing everything correctly. It's so common that it's a bit of a trope for autists. On the other hand I could perhaps see that as being a ADHD/ADD trait if your mind struggles to put out things in the right order. Even if they say you're not dyslexic it sounds like you are some variation of it, if I were you I would "lie" and tell everyone I was dyslexic just because then they'd have a better understanding of the situation.

No. 1453061

Are we allowed to vent here? I got diagnosed a few months ago, after struggling (a lot) for 23 years, and the only one who knows is my mother (she had to talk to the psychiatrist as part of the assessment). Anyways, the other day I was watching TV with my father and there was an autistic woman talking about her experience. He started saying that "asperger's syndrome doesn't exist, it's just a trend, like gluten intolerance, and true autistic people cannot communicate, let alone go on TV". It's just so frustrating nonnas

No. 1453089

I have ASD and handling large scale projects is something I struggle with a lot and I don't know how to go about improving it. For most people a project is sort of like a line where the goal is to make it from point A to Point B and so on, but for me it's more like a fractal or a branch that splits in two and then those split and so on. The result is I get stuck in convoluted details really fast and a simple project suddenly feels like a giant complex nightmare. Does anyone else experience this? And if so, how do you manage?

No. 1453107

>>1451904 >>1451925
you are dyslexic
>>1452174
you are dyslexic

No. 1453164

I hate how little I can predict how well I can mask on some days. Sometimes I feel insanely out of it, my mind can't stick to a single thought, and then when I have to perform something like an interview, my 15 years experience of masking kick in from the backend of my mind, and I perform outstandingly. Then on other days I feel energetic, or at least totally "normal", and then I go into a social situation and tire out and clam up in 2 minutes, and at that point I can't even explain that I'm tired or tell them to talk later because I'm already completely retracted from the situation, just waiting for it to be over.

No. 1453174

>>1453164
this happens to me too, but what I do is simply keep myself enduring as much as possible trying to not be 100% energetic (like a 40% maybe) and if I need time I hide in the back or in the bathroom. I keep reminding myself to be social or else everyone will say shit. In any case I've stopped myself from going out with people whenever I feel like my social battery is super drained. It always ends up bad. And if I have a job interview I try to mentalize myself days before, I know it doesn't always 100% work because I'm still awkward and afraid but at least I know I need to behave better

No. 1453572

>>1453164
>just waiting for it to be over.
I know this might sound obvious, but something that has helped me a lot is realising that when I am uncomfortable, I can just leave. Pack up your things and go, hang up the phone, whatever. When you are feeling better you can make up an excuse (I know we’re not good at lying so always have something vague like connection issues or having a headache prepared).

No. 1454759

File: 1671931579747.png (156.79 KB, 483x309, nolc.png)

lc disruptions messing up my routine and making me uncomfy

No. 1454993

File: 1671978889353.gif (3.35 MB, 452x498, crazy-cat-insane-cat.gif)

Got ear plugs for christmas and it doesn't help with misophonia like I hoped. The noises of my family eating, drinking etc. still makes me want to rip my skin off. I had high hopes.

No. 1454998

>>1454993
What type? Might sound dumb but there is a 'proper' way to wear them. If they are foam look up how to tug your ear to straighten your canal for a supreme 'seal'. If they are gimmicky plugs, get a 100pk orange ear plugs from hardware store, toss em ever few days. Wayyy better sound cancelation.

No. 1455002

>>1454998
they are the loop ones, which are meant to filter noise rather than block it. I think it's probably only going to be effective with loud noises though. i don't normally like the foam ones because i hate the feeling of my ears being completely 'sealed' - plus it makes my own chewing noises louder. but i might be better off with that sensation than listening to others. will try it and see as I do have some of the cheapy ones too, thank u.

No. 1455189

>>1455002
Np and good luck. I got off brand loop like ones for the same reason. Works great at festivals but not as great for home. I get you on the weird pressure feeling of cheap earplugs. Inserting them 'properly' does help but it doesnt fix the issue. Personally I am interested in custom earplugs, kek, like boil and mould them to the outside of your ear canal but havent gone that far yet. Good luck!!

No. 1455492

Sorry for the stupid question but I've been seen a psychiatrist for 1 year now, and he's not sure whether I have Asperger's or social anxiety, but he's leaning towards social anxiety a tad more because I'm not interested in maths or physics.
the medication he has given me (11 months ago) had no effect on me so he told me I wont have to take them anymore (and I'm not taking them since September)
He also told me that whatever I have won't be fixable with medication, that that's who I am and I would not change.
My mother is also not sure, she says I show a lot of Aspie traits but advices me that I need to go an socialize and make friends and I will get more street smart. I only go to work and I prefer being alone
Is that social anxiety or Asperger's? I'm lost as fuck.

No. 1455493

>>1455492
>he
I think you should find a woman psychiatrist instead.

No. 1455495

>>1455493
I can't, it's the only one I have available with my social work (I don't know how to say that in English sorry)

No. 1455496

>>1455492
I forgot to mention that he told me that I couldn't be asperger's because I tend to laugh and show emotion when I talk. But to be frank, socializing and talking about myself makes me so nervous that I laugh automatically and with little to no motive kek

No. 1455528

Hey nonas, Im straight and autistic, I don’t have much experience dating. Is it normal I don’t care for kissing? I don’t get anything out of it. I can do it certainly but I’m just hoping it’s over as soon as possible.

No. 1455557

>>1455492
>>1455496
He sounds r*tarded himself if he thinks you have to meet the male stereotype exactly.

Women tend to fixate on more “normal” things like tv shows and go under the radar. And autists in general aren’t emotionless robots. We just show emotions differently.

No. 1455558

>>1455528
Normal. Autists tend to experience these things differently. Most couples kiss less and less as they get older so I wouldn’t worry about it.

No. 1455604

>>1455557
Yeah, that's what I think too, yet he is more inclined to believe I have a severe case of social anxiety, but if I do, why didn't the meds work and he told me that "that's who I am"? That's were I'm at a loss kek.
Also, I also commented that I can't bear the noises of chewing, barking, or screaming children and how they makes my head hurt and also makes me extremely angry, just to name a thing,, but that seemed to fly over the radar

No. 1455649

>>1455604
I was diagnosed with social anxiety when I was young, and now I got over that social anxiety (or at least 80% over it) and am still autistic and choose to be alone most of the time. I was diagnosed a few years after that. it's not necessarily socialising that stressed me, it's not knowing the unspoken rules, or being able to read people's reactions, eye contact, saying the wrong things, general overwhelm of being around people etc. that creates the anxiety in a lot of cases. Also, for me, I just never felt the desire or need to socialise, where as people with social anxiety are usually wanting to fit in but are just shy/nervous - it usually comes from a place of insecurity. Of course, autistic people can experience social anxiety in addition. I'm not an expert or anything but that's my understanding of it. Might be worth thinking about what specifically makes you anxious when socialising.

>can't bear the noises of chewing

I'm the anon a bit further up who complained about chewing noises with my family. misophonia is very common among autistic people but again can just be related to anxiety. maybe bring in some information on autistic women (from a psychiatric source) for your psychiatrist to read.

No. 1455657

>>1455528
I have always preferred kissing someone/being kissed on the cheek over regular kissing kek

No. 1455669

>>1454993
Try wax ones that you can shape for your ears.

No. 1458426

>>1455654
The math comment was because he told me that Asperger's people then to orbit in subjects like maths, science and that shit. And he gave Einstein or Elon Musk (kek) as an example.
He do said that he's aware that I'm absorbed in arts and drawing, but that doesn't qualify as an Aspie "special interest"

No. 1458431

>>1455649
I would bring up the fact that is different on women but I don't want to be prepotent about it. Plus, he's a really old school man so I don't think he's going to change his mind about what he was taught in school.

No. 1459017

>>1458426
Lol tell him to watch a Harold Bloom interview. He was clearly on the spectrum and specialized in literature.

No. 1460498

>>1458431
Don’t listen to him then since he doesn’t know about this topic, if you can’t access a proper specialist do your own further research, read more articles about autism in women, and research coping skills and strategies for people with autism and specific issues you may face (like sensory overload, meltdowns, shutdowns, burnout, and so on) and see what helps you. Since resources for autistic women and autistic adults are such garbage in general, you can basically just help yourself without a diagnosis anyway and it makes little difference.
I ended up getting diagnosed last year and my therapist told me to lean on the support of online communities and forums for autistic women. So even browsing a board like this is in line with what you should be doing even WITH a formal diagnosis.

No. 1460890

File: 1672671453409.gif (1.39 MB, 334x220, nope.gif)

do any of you have problem eating healthily because of food texture issues? there are only a few vegetables that I deem trustworthy in terms of being the same, consistent texture each time i cook them (potatoes, carrots, peppers, peas, onions) and I'm ok with soup as long as it's the right consistency, but there is only one recipe i really like so far.
it's hard to get enough nutrition and variety in meals with those limitations. I've heard air-frying helps because it makes things more crisp and crunchy. can anyone attest to that? they're half price in the sales right now so i'm tempted.
>what are your favourite vegetables and fruits or safe foods?
>how do you prepare/cook them?
>does anything help you with food aversion?

No. 1460925

>>1460890
i have struggled with ARFID as a result of sensory issues since around age 2, but have gotten to a much better state recently. the most important advice i can give you is to 1. be in a place and situation you feel safe in when trying new foods and 2. if you like the taste and not the texture, or if you like the food but your stomach hurts after because your gut microbiome is not used to a food outside of your safe foods, be open to trying again. i only ate basically bread for nearly 20 years with peanut butter as my protein source, but now i can eat many types of meat and vegetables as long as they're well prepared with around 2 years of dedicated attempts to get better.
>what are your favourite vegetables and fruits or safe foods?
favorite fruits are fuji apples (very sweet and consistent), and bananas (consistent as long as they are the same stage). both of these are inoffensive texture wise (no seeds). vegetable-wise, i really like asparagus, green beans are okay too.
>how do you prepare/cook them?
i usually eat fruit raw, and sautee vegetables in a considerable amount of butter. i like things like celery and carrots but only in chicken noodle soup, which is a very new and advanced addition to my diet and i have to physically watch or help my boyfriend prepare it in order to stomach it
>does anything help you with food aversion?
being around someone supportive who will eat the rest of your food if you can't finish something you've tried helps me tons. try not to eat foods for the first time at restaurants, it can be very stressful. also always try to look at the menu before you go. in terms of taking the first step, i could literally feel my body wasting away from nutrition deficiency as i got more and more sick, so that was a motivator to try to work through the aversions. also don't beat yourself up on bad days when you fall back on your safe foods, and don't be afraid to use them as a reward, for example the other day i let myself have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich later on in the evening for finishing my bowl of soup at dinner.

No. 1460962

>>1460925
thank you for the genuinely helpful reply nona! sorry you’ve had this issue. but that’s great you have someone to support you and to eat leftovers. that’s one of the biggest things that bothers me is the amount of food i waste, because i literally cannot make myself eat something that feels off without wanting to flip out and/or vomit. my ex boyfriend would eat everything for me but not without shaming me or getting annoyed with how much of a “baby” i am. but I don’t have to deal with that anymore at least kek.

health and feeling weak, under nourished is definitely my biggest motivator. i like your idea of using a safe food after eating the “new” food as an encouragement.

also glad you mentioned asparagus because there was an asparagus risotto recipe I liked once and totally forgot about it, until you mentioned. adding that to my list. happy new year and hope that you continue to be healthier and enjoy more variety of foods! sounds like you’re doing really great.

No. 1461007

>>1460962
happy new year to you too and best wishes to your eating journey! hopefully trying the risotto again goes well and you find a support circle that won't shame you for something you can't control. hopefully letting yourself eat a safe food after trying a new one helps for you too, i've found it helps me vomit less as well.
all in all, sending hugs and well wishes to u!

No. 1461019

Noonas how can I convince my mother to accompany me to a expert adhd clinic and potentially start SIRs? My little brother has autism and I was officially diagnosed with adhd last year (after countless bpd and did diagnoses).because of my missdiagnose I was recommended a heavy antidepressants (a antidepressant for post partum depression) when I was 16 which caused me to have a overdose (my mother gave it to me for 6 months daily while I was supposed to take only 3 months twice a day ) and withdrawal afterwards which caused a year loss of amensia and a sucide attempt . Its been real hard to be normal . I want to start therapy and medication again but after 7 attempts to get diagnosed and then get medication which causes me harm I'm a bit wary. But it seems my mother hasn't accepted my diagnoses and claims the psychiatrist doesn't know anything maybe she doesn't want a another (defected) child .. I don't have any other options

No. 1461020

>>1460890
This was an issue for me growing up but I’ve really adjusted. Soup and stew is good, curry is great, I make a lot of golden curry. Anything you can fry is good too (like frying to add to ramen or pasta or a sandwich or burrito etc), people will complain it’s not healthy or whatever but cooking vegetables in a small amount of frying olive oil is better than not eating any at all IMO. Smoothies can have nuts, seeds, and spinach added. A leaf of kale can be chopped up extremely finely and cooked into pasta sauce so that it basically disappears. Spinach basically disappears into anything if you cut it up finely and cook it in. Eating a few baby carrots while cooking a meal is easy for me. Also, I do this because I’m a powerlifter, but I have vegetable based protein powder basically every day, and my bloodwork has been totally impeccable and better than ever, even though I feel like I’ve actually been more lax on micronutrients for years.
I essentially gave up on any vegetable I hate and doubled down on the ones I like.

No. 1461027

>>1461020
really helpful suggestions, thank you!! I agree with you about fried being better than none. humans have been frying food for thousands of years, i think it's fine in moderation. anyway, you've given me lot's of inspiration now. also, very pleased for you with how far you've come, that's amazing. i wanna be healthy and strong like you too.

No. 1461036

>>1461019
does she have to accompany you? can you bring a friend or other family member, if you need support? that sounds like an awful experience by the way, with the withdrawal, especially being so young. and sorry your mum has been dismissive of you. girl's symptoms are always overlooked because boys are more demanding and outwardly expressive, usually.

No. 1461787

>>1461036
The clinic is in a sister city near mine . I live in a remote town and the only transport I have is my mums car.(I don't drive) . As for friends and family.. I don't think they'll be supportive. My suicide attempt once leaked out in the family and many of my "supposed " friends now have ghosted me because of … I don't know really .. but I'm not really comfortable with anyone . As dismissive my mother is she's the only person I tolerate unfortunately.. I once went to therapy with my elder cousin(who potentially has the same disorder like me ) but I felt so embarrassed I kept apologising to her for seeing me so unstable. I felt incredibly embarrassed.

No. 1461823

nonnies, i have autism and adhd. i have a really hard time and always have talking to girls. im straight, i have a boyfriend, but it seems to literally take my breath away and i find myself vomiting words out that barely conjure up the sentence i was hoping for. i don't usually go out of my way to talk to girls but in situations like ordering at a till, i am useless i'm visibly very nervous and fidgeting all the time in public and when it comes to interacting with anyone i feel my heart sink and its almost like my brain is shouting at me to do/say something, but instead i malfunction. how can i stop being like this? it's preventing me from doing anything with my life

No. 1462405

>>1454993
I feel this. I bought Vibes, which were marketed as the best aspie earplugs, but they don't work well, make some sounds louder, and the seal is often worse the sounds I'm trying to ignore. I splurged on noise cancelling Bose headphones, but they only muddy outside sounds which I can still clearly hear. They help a lot, but not as much as they should for the cost. I have to turn on music really high to ignore my relatives blasting the TV or my grandmother constantly whispering to herself through her dentures while clacking them. It's like a dog licking themselves, but worse. God, I crave silence.

No. 1462469

Do you think it's wrong to think you've "grown out" of autism? When I was growing up I used to think I might have had it but now I feel like I've grown out of a lot of the symptoms and the rest I can attribute to ADHD. I don't really relate to a lot of autistic experiences because I feel like my life is pretty normal at this point.

No. 1462485

>>1462469
Not at all, at the end of the day the point of a diagnosis is ideally to guide you in coping with whatever symptoms you have. If you've reached a point where those symptoms aren't a part of your life anymore, it's reasonable to feel like you've "grown out of it," even if it's possible that you might have just learned how to optimally cope.

No. 1462552

>>1462405
ayrt. right? I felt like it amplified noises and made them crisper. they definitely did something, maybe just smoothed out background noise (which i actually want MORE of in certain situations). very strange and not sure i have any use for them. they have great marketing for something that i cannot imagine helping autistic people.

i was thinking of noise cancelling headphones. do you think they're still worth it then? white noise is the only thing that works for me. i was thinking of just keeping white noise on the headphones but it's not the same as silence and gives you a headache after a while.

>grandmother constantly whispering to herself through her dentures while clacking them

no offence to your grandma but this made me want to die, just reading it. my cat licking herself is a big problem for me. ugh.

No. 1462584

Nonnas, do you also feel sleepy as soon as you sit down to study? I've been struggling a lot to study for the last 5 years or so. Whenever I sit on my computer to get some work done, I end up falling asleep on the chair.

No. 1462587

>>1462584
Not diagnosed with anything so idk how helpful my experience is, but yes. I find that ritalin helps me get through school work without being sleepy.

No. 1462610

>>1462587
>I find that ritalin helps me get through school work without being sleepy.
Is that so? I've been taking Ritalin XR for about 2 years and, while it does help, sometimes it makes me sleepy as well. I hardly ever take Ritalin so I'm sure I didn't develop a tolerance to it. I guess I should go see my physician to sort this out.

No. 1462611

>>1461823
Sounds like you are feeling more pressure to mask around women and failing. I would recommend looking for women on the spectrum to hang out with so you can get used to being around women more. Also try and train yourself to be quiet as much as possible in uncomfortable situations so people just think you are shy/boring and not cringey.

No. 1462617

>>1462469
I think as you get older, you get more control over life, such as not having to eat foods with bad textures or wear itchy clothes or having the lights too bright. You get better at masking too, as well as being able to avoid social interactions you don't want. You also learn empathy and conversation scripts.

No. 1462692

>>1455528
I like kissing but the tongue stuff is weird, and I can't be the only one who thinks that, right? It's pretty gross.

No. 1462744

>>1462611
ayrt
i've never really thought of it as ''masking'', more of me just being a creep, so thats probably whats holding me back, people always say that it's only me who thinks im creepy, etc. thanks for your insight… i'll try and follow your advice nona.

repost because i forgot to sage fml

No. 1462750

>>1462617
I never had sensory issues like this in the first place, so I'm starting to think that I never really had autism

No. 1462754

>>1462750
Did you have any trauma? CPTSD can present like autism sometimes as your brain is affected in a similar way.

No. 1462762

>>1462744
ntayrt but i have felt the same before and still do sometimes. i think it is a combination of what >>1462611 says - even if you don't see it as masking, the pressure might be making you feel like you're trying to hard or overthinking how you're acting around them.

the other thing is - are you used to primarily socialising with your boyfriend? and perhaps previous boyfriends or male friends, more so than women? because i was a tomboy as a kid (and then unfortunately an nlog when i was a teen) so got used to speaking with men. i also got on better with my dad because we are similar. and i think the way women + men talk (particularly straight dynamic) is very different. when you're autistic it's hard to be flexible with how you communicate with people based on what you've already learned, so you may feel creepy transferring that communication style you share with men onto women? especially if it could be described as flirty. you might not be purposely being flirtatious, just that you might have learned it from men, is what i mean. maybe this is dumb but i feel like there is something to it.

anyway, i adore women and have always wanted to be friends with them instead of men, i just felt a bit alienated from the other women around me. i do feel like this is common among autistic women.

No. 1463079

What’s the stupidest thing you’ve seen people claim is a symptom of adhd/autism? I’ll go first. Some girl on tiktok was saying something along the lines of “you know you have ADHD when you don’t like to relax at home in the evening with the “big light” on and instead prefer lamps and ambiance”.

No. 1463110

>>1463079
preferring to eat with smaller sized silverware and being naturally passionate about social justice due to autism lmfao

No. 1463153

>>1462754
No, I don't. I have ADHD. I think that explains my social awkwardness and obsession over interests. I don't really have sensory issues. I was very introverted as a kid, but now I would say I'm incredibly social and spontaneous.

No. 1463176

>>1463079
pining after boy bands or boy idols during your teenage years. wannabe autists like to pretend that this is a legitimate special interest, which would make every single teenage girl an autist.

No. 1463179

>>1463079
Claiming that ADD and ADHD are the same thing.

No. 1463186

>>1463079
Singing along to songs or humming songs to pass the time while bored or doing chores. Shaking your hands when you’re excited. Biting your nails, popping pimples or picking at scabs. Taking momentary, normal interest in any kind of vaguely niche hobby, or even any hobby at all, and they frame it as a special interest suddenly. Those are some of the dumbest examples I’ve seen social media posers give as evidence of their “autism.” All kinds of completely normal shit that normies desperately want to be some proof of how special and unique they are (since they have nothing else to show for it), and meanwhile they know literally nothing about the struggles of being disabled.
I’ve also seen a lot of obvious trendhopper posers really harp on their “superhuman autistic pattern recognition” and they’re referring to like, noticing completely normal and obvious things about the world or other people, but they want people to see them as Sherlock Holmes for the sake of their stereotyped LARP.

No. 1463195

Before Christmas I finally took the plunge and called my doctor about getting diagnosed. She gave me some forms to fill in so she could check if I needed a referral. Haven’t even looked at them because I’m already tired of the uphill battle this is going to be. But I’m also tired of living like this with no answers. Fuck this shit I just want to be normal.

No. 1463220

>>1462762
TAYRT,
i totally relate on the male relationships aspect, especially how i get along more with my dad. when I was younger, like early teens, I was groomed a lot because of how much I used the Internet and associated being loved with being safe..I try not to be flirty because I don't want to flirt with women, I just want to be able to make some sort of advance or start a conversation without feeling like a huge creep, or like they instantly hate me? I mostly associate it with me being quiet as fuck in highschool and girls being nasty to me as a result has given me some pretty bad anxiety, i love girls too and i have female friends that are irl and on lolcow, just being friends with them is so much harder than it has to be

No. 1463502

>>1463110
>>1463176
>>1463186
These are all legitimate though. Autistic people have been shown in tests to have a stronger sense of fairness. Autistic people don’t like bright artificial lights. Autistic women go under the radar as they often obsess over more normal things. Skin picking is a very common symptom for women.

I’m not saying one symptom is enough to diagnose but sneering at someone thinking they might have autism and showing legitimate symptoms helps no one. Not everyone is able to get assessed and some people mask better than others.

You guys are being really autistic when you complain about these things.

No. 1463504

>>1463179
What’s the difference?

No. 1463646

>>1463186
It's funny how none of the fakers will mention the grosser aspects of the 'tism. I used to stim as a kid by chewing on anything soft like the little knobs on my brother's PS2 controller.

No. 1463803

>>1463502
i was having a think of silly things i've heard when i read the op's question but all of the seemingly ridiculous little things i could come up with were all actually explained by sperg traits, so.

the problem is most people will relate to one of the many things people claim are traits. so it's having normal quirks or behaviours (like listening to your favourite song on repeat a few times and "sometimes i like to be alone to unwind") and thinking you're autistic because of that. but you can't really pick out one thing and say it's not related to autism.

No. 1463845

>>1463502
I believe people like Jillian have autism as much as I believe men can become women anon. Autism is a medical condition and comes with limited resources and accommodations. There’s enough misinformation out there as it is. We don’t need kids who view it as an easy explanation for their unchecked pd to grasp on to it or NT that want a special “identity.” If you get diagnosed because you want a “community” you probably aren’t autistic. Autism impacts your relationships, your sensory need, your level of function, your ADL’s. TikTok fakers focus on one or two quirky symptoms and think it’s their entire personality. They think owning a stim toy makes them autistic or owning a deck of tarot cards makes them a high priestess witch. They’re shallow people who lack identity and are larping a real medical condition.
It’s why they never discuss coping with AFRAID with actual therapy solutions, sensory diets, or any actual coping.

No. 1463869

>>1463845
agree with this. autism is just another aesthetic/identity/community to so many of these people, so they shut down any real talk about it - that doesn't fit their comfy idea of what autism is - because it will inevitably exclude and invalidate them.

No. 1463971

>>1463502
yeah, except these traits are singled out and extremely oversimplified on social media to the point that it can be explained by healthy behaviour. all of these things are literally something that normies do too, just for different reasons.

No. 1465552

I've been thinking about switching out my adderall for strattera, anyone dealt with either med? At 15mg I feel like it makes me zombied out and sleepy often.

No. 1471530

File: 1673585542556.png (410.79 KB, 500x307, 36ZEWR1.png.b2f4a96d3dfe69b6f6…)

Have any other autist anons noticed that they really don't get along with cluster Bs? I feel like neurotypicals have a way higher tolerance for their catty histrionics than I do. I've literally loathed every single bippie and bipolar person I've ever met. My previous two jobs each had a bippie, and both times I either quit or was fired because of conflict with them. They often get away with it, too, because they're more "fun" and "likeable" than us apparently boring autists. Now there's a bipolar girl at my current job, and predictably, she's been a giant bitch. I don't want to ruin another work environment because a cluster B shithead antagonized me, so I'm trying to be as careful as possible.

I just can't fucking stand it, someone please round up all the cluster Bs and make them live on an island away from everyone else.

No. 1471535

>>1471530
yeah i feel the same way. i just don't have the patience to be like "nooo you're such a good person even though you ruin all of your relationships with your insane behavior" so i just try to avoid them. i had a coworker who i suspect to be bpd or something similar (don't know for sure though) have a screaming fit at work because her s/o wasn't replying to her. it was so severe that i thought she got a call saying that somebody in her family died. i just don't think it's my responsibility to deal with someone who's being hysteric like that bc i'm not well-equipped enough to help them. i'll be kind of course, but what else am i supposed to do kek im not a therapist or crisis counselor. they can just be a lot to be around.

No. 1471614

>>1471530
Cluster Bs seem to love me at first but the feeling is not mutual. Apparently I make for good FP fuel and anyone who has been one of those "favorites" knows how much it sucks. idgi I don't even mask well, I'm just that friendly flavor of retard until someone's mean enough to knock me out of it, I have no idea how or why they think I'm cognitively equipped to handle their emotional reasoning.

I'd really like to just get along with them, but legitimately every bipolar, bippie, and narc I've ever befriended has either treated me horribly or done something awful enough to mutual friends that I can't be near them in good conscience. Nowadays I don't bother socially and use the "Conflicting access needs" twitterspeak as an excuse to why I don't. Autism is a disability, and enough of us have impairment to our ability to read emotional cues that it's a diagnostic feature. I tell people it's as unreasonable to expect me to understand and communicate via cluster b emotional reasoning as it is to expect a blind person to understand and communicate via sign language. This doesn't always endear me to others, but it's kept me from falling down the FP hole again.

No. 1471717

>>1471530
I feel like I actually tolerate women with BPD better than most people I’ve seen do because I view all their actions through the lens of psychoanalysis or whatever, like I see their behaviors as lists of traits out of a textbook, and I just go “ohh wow. That seems really tough. Wow I hope things get better” and I basically view them the way I view children who scream and act out. Also, while I don’t relate to making dumb decisions or acting maliciously out of emotion, I’ve had enough catastrophic autist meltdowns in my life that somehow I feel compassionate towards their freakouts. Like when girls with BPD self harm and threaten to off themselves, even though they do it in a public theatrical way to get a desired outcome from other people, I sort of can’t help but look at it and think it’s similar to my own meltdowns where I cry and hit myself. Both are retarded I guess kek and I sort of imagine they also just feel it’s impossible to control themselves.
Also like someone else said I’ve also had experience with cluster Bs sort of flocking to me and copying things I do, which can be both flattering and annoying. I feel like that’s common, that normies searching for identity often emulate autistic girls, because we have true uniqueness and don’t usually wait for society’s approval or a trend or someone else to follow our interests and express ourselves. And cluster Bs always copy people who seem to have a real identity and passion because they envy that. I’ve had so many of them blatantly copy my whole image and hobbies and then they later move on to some other more attention grabbing crap like onlyfans or drag or whatever.

No. 1473042

-going to replace this here, and edit some mistakes i made while intoxicated, I think i'll be understood more here and people can tell me if whats going on is atustism
i legit think i'm artistic and I don't know what to do. it's like i'm realizing that all the little things I do aren't "normal" and it's becuase i'm artistic and it makes me feel so confused. Of course I'm not properly decided to be it, but I feel that way.
>I often get obessed with re-reading things I find funny that i wrote/created
>for example, I did the thread picture for Shay's thread. I'd constantly look at it and giggle & or point out flaws.
>I re-read things to find words that are there or aren't there
>examples- "I'm so fucking thristy"
>I would re-read to look for a phantom word if you will, like
>I'm so freaking thristy
or
>I'll just re-read it to appereicate how they words were put togeather.
>I get attached to things ideas
no lie, for years, I didn't through out old diaries/papers, even if they are covered in mouse shit and are probably a health hazard and unreadable.
>I cringe when i read my old writings and don't want to read them but i want to keep them.

No. 1473098

File: 1673721489512.jpeg (256.6 KB, 828x1385, BFF6892B-4387-478D-81DF-9D68FD…)

why are allistics like this

No. 1473135

File: 1673725691132.jpeg (59.46 KB, 275x269, 1672973938840.jpeg)

Do stimulants just… stop working after a while? I've taken ritalin for 10+ years and I don't feel like it really has any effect on me anymore. I don't think I have depression but I do have extremely low energy and even after taking ritalin I just want to lie down. I'm not sure if I should just stop taking it for a while and try to reset things. Is my dopamine system just completely fucked up?

No. 1474380

Please offer me advice for overcoming executive dysfunction hurdles, specifically in my studies and overwhelm due to details. For instance, I struggle to study from my textbook, because the pages are so full and the text feels incoherent. I also struggle to make a planner which includes my academic responsibilities, life responsibilities and personal goal tasks, in such a way that I don't neglect either and can work toward long- and short-term goals alike. I've been reading various articles on the matter, yet am still searching. Please do share whatever you may know! My focus for detail is a great obstacle. Yesterday my professor gave enlightening insight, after I shared my hardship with her: „Although others may overlook the details and patterns you observe, providing them with smoother academic progression, your thorough nature will ultimately grant you the most knowledge and best understanding of the subject.” It was comforting, alongside inspiring, as it is discouraging for me to struggle academically where I usually never do and actually excel. But I now realise it is due to my autism that I meet obstacles, not my intelligence. Therefore, I hope to work with my autism, so my potential can blossom the way it is destined to!

No. 1474385

>>1463646
I'm sorry if this is offensive but that image is so adorable… I also like the word knobs

No. 1474388

>>1451191
Autism can make basic tasks like eating enough difficult, as well as being in a room with bright lights and many noises for too long can cause damage to the immune system due to heightened stress. If your diagnosis is recent, it can take a while to adapt to these needs and find a job appropriate. Do you really not experience any of the symptoms you need to exhibit to be diagnosed with autism..? How? You really don't know how it works and it affects the entire body..? The brain, nervous system, even digestion. How then can you speak the way you do? I feel sorry for you and the prejudiced views you've adopted for whatever reason.

No. 1474390

has anyone here tried neurofeedback therapy?

No. 1474403

File: 1673870513687.jpg (9.97 KB, 170x187, furby.jpg)

can anyone offer advice on adult autism diagnosis in the UK? i finally earn enough money to look at going private but i don't even know where to start. how do i tell my GP i think i'm autistic? are there any ND britbongs out there with experience in this?

No. 1474409

>>1473098
I like girls like that. What's wrong?

No. 1474414

>>1474388
Not any of the anons above, but your description of autism makes me feel hopeless… I don't know if I'm an autist (I probably am, or I'm an "aspie" at least because I've always been a little weird) but once I reached 17 years old I turned into a different person. It's like I'm not a human anymore, I can't function normally but it's something I can't exactly pinpoint either. I can focus on something, I could probably hold a job for at least a month, but everything else falls apart. I remember struggling to keep something down during my first job for months. After I graduated my body was in shambles and I had to be hospitalized because I just couldn't eat and digest anything.
How can someone overcome this? I'm a neet now but I absolutely want to "become normal" eventually, but I genuinely fear my body won't be able to handle it for some reason. Are there tricks to at least seem normal while being autistic or am I doomed to be a useless neet forever? To think I wanted to study hard in university and have a high income job.

No. 1474441

File: 1673876273111.jpg (454.66 KB, 2048x2897, Tumblr_l_591741591947287.jpg)

Idk if I'm an autist/aspergers haver or deeply fucked up socially due to a great childhood. My parents called me one and in my high-school years people were uncharacteristically nice to me for that age bc I'm pretty sure they/some teachers decided that I'm peacefully mental. I notice social cues (maybe even too sensitive to that), can read the room, can hold a light convo, but I ignore them a lot too, look so impassive it's off-putting to others if I don't force myself to act up and generally fucking awkward. On the other hand, it's hard for me to stop talking about things that excite me, even if I see that the other person lost interest. I don't like crowds/too much noise/too much stimuli, tho I handle them okay. On sensory stuff, honestly no idea. I think I trained myself to live in discomfort long ago tbh.
I've been to a psychiatrist, but we talked about depression mostly. She wanted to send me to a psychologist, but I never went. Maybe I should've.

No. 1474467

I'm not autistic (or at least I hope I'm not) but I relate to two things: sensory issues and struggle to read body language.

The sensory issues started in early childhood but got better with time since I've started to have more control over my things/environment, and by now I got rid of them completely.

Body language: I compensate by paying more attention to how people speak, tone of voice etc. and their actions in general.

Saging because it's not that relevant, just shower thoughts lol

No. 1474485

What is the benefit of getting a diagnosis as an adult? Are there refunds or discounts available as an adult diagnosed with autism or ADHD? If anything I personally just research on how the brain perceives things as someone with ASD or ADHD and learn to go about in the world with that knowledge.
Like, I know I tend to procrastinate a lot and I also tend to reprioritize things and end up forgetting important things because I believe other things are more important first and then I realize the thing I've been pushing down on the priority list is extremely important and it's kind of too late to do anything about what I missed for the day.
I dunno, I don't know what a professional diagnosis would do to help me with the knowledge I have now. I'm not gonna enable myself to find an excuse for others to accept. I can't just be like, "Lol sorry for forgetting something important, I have ADHD." I don't even need to explain to someone I have ADHD, saying it out loud with confidence isn't going to make myself or another person feel better.

No. 1474529

>>1474485
With a diagnosis you can get professional help if you need it, including medication, and if your disability prevents you from being able to work you need a diagnosis to get social welfare. If you need accommodations or supports in education or work then you also need a diagnosis. I'm not sure what else you are expecting. If you are not effected enough to need any of these things then I'm not sure why you would even consider pursuing a diagnosis.

No. 1474572

For a few years I've wondered if I'm just a bit odd, artistic, and socially delayed, or if there's genuinely something up with me. But at the same time I'm older now and have just kind of muscled through it all on my own so far, so a diagnosis would mainly give me an explanation rather than resources.
I'll sage because I'm just pondering.
>always had sensory issues, couldn't wear certain fabrics or tags as a kid and used to pull fits as a teen/younger adult if I was too sweaty or wore certain clothing (I attributed this to my anger issues)
>sometimes randomly reach a certain point in conversations where I "turn off" and I get upset at them still talking (I know this is illogical so I'm better at smoothly leaving as an adult)
>noticed that I've perma-numbed myself to life, perhaps to avoid being overwhelmed by noise/other people but may also be to stop being nervous in public
>cringe obsessions with certain cartoon characters as a teen. I'd go into detail but it's cow-worthy, just know that it was socially unacceptable for a 16-year-old. And by obsession I mean drawing him all the time (amongst other things that are…strange), and I used to draw all day in and out of class, likely 8-10 hours a day cumulatively
>other delays in interests (eg. Would bring dolls to school at 17 and usually disliked watching anything but cartoons until I was 21 or so)
>poor sense of boundaries wrt sharing information. I emotionally sort people into "uncomfortable" and "comfortable" and will be tempted to overshare with people as soon as they feel comfortable. However this is often too early, so I have begun to restrain myself. This has lead to sharing fuck all ever at times but I'm at some sort of balance now.
>incapable of flirting. I ask them on a date and we discuss our feelings bluntly or it's nothing.
>tried to decipher social hierarchy and fell into a femcel lookism hole, but actually talking to people and growing up has made me less passionate about it (I was trying to figure out why people didn't like me but simply don't care now)
>befriended an autistic woman and we hit it off well because I felt I could be myself with her and didn't need to hold back, but it did end because everyone is capable of having certain flaws regardless of neurotype
>really enjoy pacing, especially when I'm imagining the stories in my head involving characters I make. I used to be able to do this for hours before adulthood, but I do think of these characters all day throughout the day still
>mother used to tease me for my robot voice whenever I was trying to explain my emotions to her. She literally called it that.
The thing that makes me think I must just be a bit odd instead of the tism is that I have a genuine interest in the lives of others. I LOVE small talk about the boring bullshit people get up to, it's like a TV show for free. I love everyone I meet dearly and even used to keep a log of them. I've heard many autistics say they don't enjoy hearing about the lives of others. Is that true?
I can also read emotions moderately well and am sensitive to someone making fun of me. I evaded bullying for years because of this and because everyone thought I was capable of seriously harming them.

No. 1474573

I hate meltdowns/shutdowns because I can't have them because my mom punishes me when I do and I wish people understood meltdowns and I wish they understood stimming is not cute and quirky it is me trying to soothe my nervous system I hate being parentified and I know I am legally an adult but life isn't like the movies where you just move out and get a career the moment you turn eighteen I am not responsible for her immaturity why would she not just learn about my neurodivergency to help me I feel self conscious every time I experience these meltdowns I cannot be myself around anybody because nobody understands what it is like unless they are autistic themselves and how would they help me the way the people around me should i have a lot of pain from always holding my emotions in because they have made my muscles extremely tense and I can't let go because I know if I let go I will be punished nobody gives a fuck about people like me

No. 1474604

Can you be autistic while also being extroverted and spontaneous?

No. 1474622

>>1474604
…are you serious

No. 1474625

>>1474604
Yes, I know one who is like that

No. 1474638

>>1474572
This all sounds like typical experiences of autistic women, so I would suspect it, but with all autism traits it depends on the severity.
Also yes we can and often are social and very empathetic, we just experience it differently from NTs. Ngl the fact that your normie example is keeping a log of people you meet is really funny kek that is not normie behavior.
Of course you could still be neurotypical but I would potentially suspect autism given your description, I guess the real question is do your symptoms feel within the range of normal human experience and like you have been able to function and cope normally without help, or would you feel comfortable saying you relate to feeling disabled, and like you have needed significant support in your life with normal structures and tasks? Do you crash and burn when/after you are forced to take on life alone? Is your sensory overwhelm unusual and excessive? Is your internal sense of difference and distance from most people and their social structures extreme and frequently debilitating? Have you experienced a lot of bullying, isolation, judgment, weird comments about how you are strange or in likeable or don’t fit in? Do you find that your life has to be structured in a very specific way for you to cope (work, social settings, clothes, exposure to sensory stimulus etc)? Have you had major issues with outbursts of anger, or “tantrums” or self harm, hitting, crying loudly over things like noise or schedule changes? Has being undiagnosed resulted in recurrent mental health or functionality issues? Those are the kinds of things I would consider for whether or not you would classify your experiences as fitting ASD.

No. 1474639

>>1474622
I am hearing a lot of conflicting information, like from >>1474625
>>1474625
Can you tell me more?

No. 1474653

>>1474639
nayrt but we're autistic, not inhuman. we're capable of the full spectrum (kek) of human personality just like anyone else.
to be less nitpicky, yes someone can be both autistic and extroverted or spontaneous. it's less common, but they exist

No. 1474683

>>1474639
ayrt
>>1474653
this is what i meant. autism is not personality.

No. 1474689

I hate having to go and jump through hoops to get my autism accommodations done for college, it's so annoying! i recognize why they need the documentations of whether someone actually has it or is just faking (tiktok moment) but going and taking time out of my classes to go to my doctor and verify that, yes, I have autism and need help in school grates on me.
The other thing that grinds my gears is seeing the fakers who stim weird (eg flapping hands from side to side as opposed to up and down) as a part of their base-level larp. If you're going to larp as one of us, do it correctly.

No. 1474702

I haven't been diagnosed for autism but right now the psychologist i have been seeing is really convinced i have it. I have done testing for it and i am still waiting for the outcome of that testing. I feel like it's super obvious when i talk to strangers something is amiss with me and it makes me really paranoid and anxious because i don't have an explanation for my behaviour and in some sense i don't understand why they care so much. Lately i have been forced to do group work. Usually when i was in high school i would always wait for the groups to assemble and join whatever group was available because i don't know the criteria in making a decision of who would make a good person to work with when i don't know them. Idk how people decide how to introduce themselves or how they decide, yes this looks like an interesting person. I ignore everyone around me as much as possible mainly because i don't have much interest in them in the first place other than observation purposes and because i am afraid they will hate me for being weird and antisocial. It helps i never really get approached by people anyways. I also feel like when ever somebody DOES try to talk to me, i am simply incapable of giving the correct response. My method of finding a group failed me completely this time around because every group was full and i was left to my own devices to choose one. Eventually a group let me in but it was very embarrassing and i had to hold back my tears and cried in the car after i left.

No. 1474703

>>1474683
If autism isn't a personality, why do so many people with autism say they are introverted and love having a scheduled life?

No. 1474711

>>1474703
because difficulty reading social cues and emotional dysregulation are diagnostic features of the disorder. introversion makes it easier to avoid extra social cues and a schedule keeps unpleasant surprises to a minimum. most people adapt behavior to minimize pain, we aren't any different. autistic people who have an easier time handling surprises are less likely to want or need a schedule, and autists who have an easier time reading social cues or managing sensory input are more likely to be extroverted. almost like we all have different needs and unique personalities.

No. 1474713

>>1474689
Everything IEP related is such a hassle, sucks to be us I guess, because with or without it (I tried both ways in college) it can end up strenuous depending on your school and professors.
The best outcomes were compassionate professors who treated me with understanding and respect as a human being, with or without my IEP. The worst was I had two professors treat me like subhuman, say “we all hate people like you” “my daughter has IBS and she can do everything normally, why can’t you do everything normally just because you have some mental condition” and even one vaguely threatened me and had me come to some terrifying abandoned building alone to meet him and kept going “so what will you do to convince me not to fail you” there.
But after I changed universities I had better experiences. I ended up going to one with a bit of a woke reputation and they then actually treated me like a normal human there finally and never hassled me over my condition and I finally really excelled and had no more school troubles.

No. 1479015

Every time I come to post here I type up a bunch of responses to relatable posts in the thread, but then delete them all because I feel like my thoughts are dumb and don't make sense. Does anyone else feel completely trapped in their own head at times?

No. 1479496

Have any of you nonnas become better conversationalists? I struggle to talk to people if we don’t have shared interests/experiences (I’m okay with people who are interested in philosophy/music/literature in general or who are taking the same college course as me, for example, because I have certain things I know I can talk to them about), but I struggle with small talk and chatting to people I don’t know well. I am also told that I take things too literally and sometimes have an “interrogative” manner of conversation that comes off as aggressive, but it’s just because I like to be exact in the way I communicate and don’t appreciate ambiguity.

No. 1479521

>>1479496
I'm really good at small talk but only because it's so scripted. Basically every conversation is almost the exact same and I've had it before. I can't figure out how to have a "freestyle" conversation about my interests or anything "deep" to save my life though. I sometimes even go non verbal. And sharing my personal opinions and thoughts with others feels very violating. It seems like a majority of autists hate small talk but I can't really understand why that's almost universal, it's really the perfect place to use scripting and make good use of your pattern recognition. Although I do think with small talk that presenting a friendly manner is much more important than anything you actually say so maybe that is more difficult for most autists than having something interesting to say.

No. 1479526

>>1479015
All the time, all across the site. Doesn't help that a lot of anons are wannabe mean girls who just want to be bitchy at other nonas instead of the cows. I've gone back to mostly lurking to avoid provoking the assholes.

No. 1479532

>>1479526
I have a hunch that some of these wannabe mean girls are from kiwifarms, but yes you are correct. There's a large chance you can catch the attention of a mean girl Wanna be who barely read your post and just wants to snark

No. 1479667

how do i stop hurting myself when i'm overwhelmed? i was doing so well for a few months but my boyfriend and i got in a very minor argument last week and i couldn't handle it mentally and banged my head really hard repeatedly on my doorframe (in private). i usually only get the urge to do this if i am very overwhelmed sensory-wise or if i am feeling very embarrassed and i feel like a huge retard everytime. at least i wasn't concussed this time. how do i stop doing this permanently?

No. 1479889

>>1479521
>It seems like a majority of autists hate small talk but I can't really understand why that's almost universal
In my case, I think it's because I can see right through it being an actual conversation and immediately recognize that it's just one of the thousands of social niceties that I struggle so much to keep up with. You described it perfectly:
>presenting a friendly manner is much more important than anything you actually say
Why the fuck would I bother engaging in a conversation if it's not an actual exchange of information? It's fucking maddening. And when I question people on this, they tell me "idk it's just a social thing you have to do". But why? I would rather not start a conversation at all if we're not going to be discussing anything worthwhile.

>>1479526
ayrt, this is the first time I've actually made a post in a really long time. I don't know why other anons can't accept that we're all spergs here. No "normal" woman would come onto a website like lolcow. We're all here for a reason.

No. 1480994

>>1479667
Mitigate the impulse as much as possible. Hitting the fatty parts of your thighs is far less damaging than almost anywhere else, but even better if you can just powerfully pretend to hit yourself but stop short of the hit, or punch furniture/pillows instead, that’s much better. Anything that’s not hitting vulnerable areas of your body especially your head. I used to punch my stomach hundreds of times during meltdowns but have slowly been able to move to just pretending to repeatedly hit my leg and I basically barely tap the side of my leg, like a “punch” but not enough to hurt, but the wind up to the punch is very strong so it gets the frustration out and the bit of sensation still helps me focus and calm down.

No. 1481140

How do express emotions without it sounding ingenious. there are moments people are laughing about something or having a burst of excitement. i dont know how to act in a way it doesn't make them feel awkward or unwanted. im just as equally happy as they are but it just doesn't read as such

No. 1481183

>>1481140
I have the same problem. I don't know how to express positive emotions even though I have them. I can only express my negative emotions lol.

No. 1481288

>>1481140
The only thing that helped me was learning to “unmask” around the people I’m comfortable with. I was taught that you had to express joy or happiness or humor a certain way and my natural “reaction” like bouncing and smiling too much was childish and stupid or my laugh was too loud and annoying, my voice was too gravely. Etc etc. so I learned to fake a more feminine laugh, pitch shift my voice. All these rules to make people like me and to survive the abusive environment I was raised in.
Making close relationships with other women on the spectrum mostly and only building close relationships with NT that like me were really big to getting there. In my experience a lot of NT like how you treat them and confuse that with liking you. They then find you annoying anytime you are yourself. Those people are self involved dicks and make bad friends.
I have to focus less on myself and what I’m supposed to be doing and just on being present and enjoying the company or activity. Hopefully that makes sense.

No. 1484028

File: 1674878266609.jpg (21.13 KB, 209x275, m-30.jpg)

this is an extremely shameful thing to admit but I sometimes forget that autism is a development disorder. When I got my diagnosis my IQ was in the low end of average and as cruel as it may sound I wish it had been 1-2 points lower because then at least I could get support. I was just on the line that said I was functioning enough but I'm not. I know I'm more functioning than other autists but I still can't do/understand a lot of stuff. My thought process and worldview is very childish and I have a hard time to keep up with anything. From conversations, to pronouncing words right, to any abstract concepts. I'm just ashamed of my whole being. I can tell that everyone takes pity on me because they can easily tell that I'm not normal

No. 1484269

>>1440291
If it makes you feel any better nona, I relate too much to this speech too.

>>1444098
Yeah, but it's something you have to work at if you're high functioning.

>>1484028
If it's any consolation nona, I feel the same way even though I was considered "double gifted" in school. It makes me want to kms since I feel like I have to either have a crippling drug addiction or paraplegia or some shit just to get basic support beyond platitudes. I wish I had something reassuring and helpful to say to you.

No. 1484697

>>1484028
I wouldn't assume people are pitying you, at least not always. It sounds like if I met you I could tell you were just a genuine person doing the best you can and I'd feel way more solidarity with you for that than some normie arsehole who thinks they're perfect. A lot of people are just masking the same feelings of overwhelm in the world that you have and if they meet someone with the same struggles they think "thank god it's not just me who finds this shit hard".

No. 1484774

File: 1674964026661.jpeg (13.04 KB, 453x441, images.jpeg)

Despite about what a lot of people say about female aspies i am super bad at masking, im sure most people can tell i am weird just from the ways i act and talk, i wonder if anyone here is the same, and if you have any tips on how to become better at masking please tell me i wanna blend in.

No. 1484785

>>1484774
I think my acceptable degree of masking skill is due to my high literacy combined with my extensive and varied social history. Obviously a decent number of random ultranormies still say I’m straightlaced, shy, aloof, intimidating, or unusual, but I don’t get recognized as autistic. I ended up late diagnosed despite my enormous functionality issues because I’m quick witted and good with language and impersonations. If you can’t spend more time IRL trying to mirror people, try mirroring the cadence of various TV characters, do speeches in your room, get used to speaking at a steady pace with an affable tone and varied inflections. If you tend to stammer or speak in too stilted of a way, I think reading a lot can help as well as practicing speaking. I do a lot of roleplay games and RP practice on my own so I can basically imitate any person or character unless I’m in sensory overload and then I just choose a character to be at any time. I’ve always made limited eye contact and had “weird” body language and been constantly doing sensory regulation stims but people often fail to see it as that unusual because I make up for it with my friendly and mildly excited tone of voice, jokes, projected interest in whatever bs they’re talking about, smiling and laughter, and also cultivating a good image. I honestly think working hard to look conventionally pretty and fashionable has helped a lot bc people project a lot of assumptions onto your appearance, so dressing fashionably and wearing good makeup helps too. Some studies also say that dressing in a somewhat more artsy way makes neurotypicals apply your ND qualities to the artsy outfit as an “explanation,” like an “oh I see, she’s just quirky on purpose, but in a good way” type of thing.

No. 1484802

>>1484774
It kind of helps to think of it as acting or roleplaying. You have to REALLY care what people think about you though. Wanting it badly enough will make you committed to getting better. These days (age 30) I don't care too much but I do it out of habit from years and years of caring SO much. I hope this makes sense.

No. 1484860

>>1484785
Very similar to you nonna, also the RP thing is clutch. The more I read, the better I am at knowing what to say in conversations, and I also find watching media with a lot of snappy back and forth conversation helps. It really feels like just learning improv and acting skills honestly. I think I'd make a great voice actor sometimes kek.

No. 1488346

Once you got an official diagnosis, did it change anything for the better for you in the workplace? The last one I didn’t do well at all and was met with hostility, this time i thought i was doing decently though its a hard balance to strike, and a coworker straight up asked me if i was autistic kek. So does having a disability so to speak and listing autism help with job applications? If you present decently well in an interview is it seen as a good thing? In a sort of “fulfilling a disabled quota without being a big burden” way. Are people generally more understanding of your quirks or quietness? If they know at work?

No. 1488454

>>1488346
>Once you got an official diagnosis, did it change anything for the better for you in the workplace?
Yes because they are legally required to accommodate for my needs. And yes that gives them a greater understanding if I'm acting weird or have uneven energy days. I think it's better to tell your employee something along the lines of "if I do something weird it's because of my autism/aspergers, just let me know if I do something too weird or distracting". Let them know it's ok to tell you to stop because you truly didn't mean to disturb others and didn't realize what you did was distracting.
Personally I think saying "aspergers" is better even if your diagnosis papers say ASD/autism. Aspergers is know as "the high-functioning version of autism" or even just "quirky nerd, but smart", so it is a bit less stigmatized, while just "autism" sounds more like "I am special needs and will be a burden". Most people don't know the diagnosis name changed in some countries*. It's not right, but it is what it is. If you're able to apply to jobs on your own you're on the high-functioning end anyway so you're not lying.

*Many countries don't even use the DSM5 that merged the terms, it's not a universal standard. Aspergers is still a valid diagnosis given out in most of the world.

No. 1488500

>>1473135
You can develop tolerance to Ritalin/mph when you take it consistently for such a long time. I think psychiatrists can increase the dosage when this happens, as you need a larger amount to get the same desired effects.
> if I should just stop taking it
If you've been using it (almost) every day for so long, you should probably gradually decrease usage (spread out over like a week) instead of just quitting overnight.

On the topic of stimulants: do any autistic nonnies here take stimulants to help with everyday functioning?

No. 1495788

File: 1676013877721.jpg (29.38 KB, 567x542, 2cec71161268a2ef69288b5a4a2105…)

I hate being an autist some days. I recently got a job at an office and the social interaction is just so hard for me to navigate. It's very stressful and I don't want to talk to any of the people there, I just want to do my work and go home, but there's so much politic and drama that I can't process. Plus we have two troons that clearly have some kind of PD and run around being awful.

I only just started but I don't know how much longer I can last. I don't want to be unemployed. I just hate that I can never seem to land a job that doesn't feel like an emotional energy vampire.

No. 1497966

not 100% sure if I have ADD or ADHD, but I really think I do. Granted, the tiktok world has really made it hard for me to differentiate between yes or no. So I do a bit of introspective looking;
I have always been loud, I get loud when I get excited. I was always like that as a kid. I was terrible in school academically wise, but I excelled in classes like wood work and media art.
I can't pay attention to things that I find boring for a very long time.
When I read a book I will constantly skim the page I'm reading looking for quotations or something to "pop" out at me so I look forward to getting to that part, including the last word of a chapter if the end of a chapter is on either of the two pages- Its really annoying and I have tried to stop myself from looking ahead but i have never been able to stop it.
I'm nearly 30 now, and I have been told by a psychiatrist that I have ADD tendencies, but this was upwards of 7 years ago and nothing else came from that comment.
I have recently had a baby so my attention is even more thin nowadays and that is why I am really noticing differences.
I am waiting for my next psychiatrist appointment becuase I told her I wanted to go over the posibility of getting a diagnosis.
Will it change my life? Probably not.
But where I live you can get grants and other accomodating quality of life things through the government if you are under "disability"
not that i am looking for that. I guess I would juust like to know so that I can have a better "understanding" of myself from an outside perspective
/shrug

No. 1498776

>>1495788
relate to this a lot. work used to drain me but mostly because of the social impact. i got a work from home job now and it's heaven (in comparison). but i have to go to a meeting IRL at least once a month and it makes me exhausted for about 24 hours afterwards. made me realise i was living that feeling of exhaustion daily when i worked in an office.

hope you can get away from people in your next job nona. in the mean time, let people think you're rude and unfriendly if it means staying out of all the politics and straining to be "friendly" all the time. i wish i embraced coming across like an unfriendly bitch sooner in life. it works wonders for boundaries and people will know to leave you alone more, apart from the PD ones but they don't understand the meaning of boundaries.

No. 1498889

>>1484774
im the same, i think i unconsciously mask a bit but not enough for people to not catch on that I'm different. i don't try to purposely mask anymore it's just too exhausting and not sustainable - i would go crazy at home after a full day at work.
i just act how i naturally do and honestly most people are fine, i know people can tell im different but no one is ever rude or nasty, but maybe im lucky with my coworkers.

No. 1498923

>>1498889
>i know people can tell im different but no one is ever rude or nasty
this has been my experience too. it's like nts can sense discomfort and react poorly to it because i get a better reception being unabashedly "odd" but comfortable than my best masking days.

No. 1499365

I think I'm somewhat on the spectrum but I also have been diagnosed with BPD, ADHD, and other shit and don't really care to try to get a 'tism diagnosis.

As for what really causes autism, I suspect it's related to diet or chemicals in the last few centuries but is it also possible that some people are just neurotic types and are predisposed to traits of personality disorders and spectrum behaviors? Ik I have BPD but I've doubted that because of how much the attention-seeking people in DBT make me fucking cringe. I've taken a few quizzes that include all the personality disorders and I notice that my neuroticism, emotional dysregulation, and obsessive thoughts seems to manifest through higher than average scores for OCD, paranoid, schizoid, etc, as well. I seriously think I have higher than normal neuroticism and that the traits of all these weird disorders just manifest in my fucked up brain. Sad.

No. 1499513

File: 1676357374430.jpg (75.87 KB, 960x960, whappa.jpg)

>>1498776
Thank you for the kind words nonny. I might try your tactic of being straight up bitchy. It still tires me out and depresses me, but at least people wouldn't be taking advantage.

No. 1500051

>>1498776
nta…what kind of job are you working in now?

No. 1500124

>>1500051
I work for a hospital doing admin work, which can all be done from home. It was a trainee position, meaning I didn't have to have any experience and received training throughout the first year on top of work. the best part is that the hours are totally flexible, which means i can work whenever suits me and also means that there aren't constant zoom meetings since everyone has odd hours (hence the monthly face-to-face meetup). It was a rare find I think, but I found the job listing by searching for 'work from home + flexible hour trainee' positions, if I recall correctly.

No. 1500666

File: 1676459669199.png (1 MB, 890x892, 1624419044548.png)

I keep flying into a tard rage whenever I see how many people fake being autistic on places like tiktok. I didn't even know I had autism until I was in my late twenties and I feel like a lot of women who actually have autism go through the same experience. It's not a fun and quirky disorder, everyone is not a 'little' autistic, it's not just muh stim and muh lack of eye contact, it's lonely and fucking hell to live as an autistic woman. I'm constantly passed over for jobs, promotions, I'm never the favorite, I can barely tolerate keeping two friends in my life but it's cripplingly lonely, but noooo autism is so cool and quirky and it's totes why I'm obsessed with this anime video game teehee!
I know I need to stop sperging and stop being a tard about this, but ugh.

No. 1500682

>>1500666
Me too nona. Sometimes I think "what's the harm if they make people pay attention to autism" but then they really do speak over actual autistic people, make us look dumb(er than we already are kek), they spread misinformation and take resources away from real autsits who need it. I know they do it for every disorder now but it still pisses me off.

>>1499365
>As for what really causes autism, I suspect it's related to diet or chemicals in the last few centuries
No, in that case we wouldn't really have clear hereditary links. Brain scans of autists show that there is no "brain damage" (unless that individual happens to have it of course) so the saying that autist brains are just "differently wired" is pretty accurate. Different mental disorders have always existed, whether people threw them out to die or accepted them varied.
But high functioning autism in males was no doubt often a "good thing" when it came to academia at least. It's interesting how all the "crazy professor" stereotypes that have been around for at least a few centuries seem to match up with autistic traits, despite the people making them not having a clue autism even exists. Often if you look up old brilliant scientists you'll find their peers described them as really weird, having odd habits, not behaving or dressing "properly", forgetting to eat and not being very sociable etc. We obviously can't diagnose them or know for sure, but them having the exact traits as modern autists says something.

Idk if it was this or the last thread, but it's been pointed out that every single autism trait can exist in any person without it being from autism. Even multiple of them at the same time, yet it's not autism that caused it for them. So I'm not saying a poor diet or chemicals can't ever cause symptoms similar to autistic traits, but "real" autism isn't caused by it.

No. 1500827

I hate how 'autistic', 'spergy', etc are used as insults by NTs, especially on the farms. Yes I know where we are and our board culture's influences, but it still fucking stings and reeks of high school-tier bullying. I didn't choose to have Asperger's and I don't appreciate my disability being used as a slur by some brat who doesn't understand what it actually means to have this condition. It does not mean 'stupid', or 'pedantic', or any other word we already have a definition for in English; it literally just refers to a brain condition that honestly sucks to have.

No. 1500839

>>1500827
You need to go back to Twitter or tik tok. That's crazily bold of you to assume anyone here who is "NT" is not a sperg in denial or undiagnosed. Do you just assume anyone who isn't yourself or in this thread is "NT"? Lmfao. "Spergy" and "autistic" are also not usually used to mean "stupid", at least for the 8 years I've been here. It's almost always used to describe behavior that is typically associated with autism….i.e. yes, pedanticism, neuroticism, and the like. Do you just not like it that other people can clock autistic behavior easily?

No. 1500847

>>1500827
I've had the opposite reaction to it. Hearing anons talk about "sperging" gave me a fun and silly way to describe my own behavior among loved ones and become more confident in my own autistic traits. And we're on an imageboard, most of us are autistic even if it's only a small number of us using the thread. Self awareness can be fun, I'm sorry that you're having a hard time with how anons express theirs.

No. 1500850

>>1500839
That's crazily bold of you to assume I came from Twitter or TikTok, or anything else you read into my vent post. The use of those terms is not always harmful, no, and sometimes it can be both apt and funny. But it would be lying to deny that there are times when those words are used as insults, and that anons here can make crude generalizations about autistic people not deserving friendship, romantic love, and so on (see current relationship advice thread). Frankly, I don't think it matters if some of them really are autistic, diagnosed or not, if they say shit like that. Obviously I can't control what people post and you're free to disagree with me, but I'm just as free to post my opinion.

No. 1500861

>>1500850
nayrt but I went to read that thread after your post and I found at most two posts, which say:
>If you believe she can find an attractive man when shes an autist who was desperate enough to spend god knows how much on a guy she's not even committed to, you're fooling yourself. Autistic men and women both can't pull.
>there are a lot of incel like nonnies on here who are targets for abuse by moids because of their autism and their unrealistic expectations built up from fictional moids.
Which is both mild for this site and partially true. Autistic people, especially women, are abused at higher rates compared to non-autists. We don't read cues well and we're likelier to have been ostracized growing up, so more of us are likely to compromise our boundaries in order to "keep" someone all the while not realizing how much they're harming us. Not all of us, and a lot of us grow out of it, but it's not unkind to say the truth that we get targeted for abuse.

No. 1500872

>>1500850
youre on an imageboard… terms like sperging out etc have been a thing for years, it's a part of imageboard culture hence why we still use them here. if you want to take it as a personal insult that's on you, as other anons have told you a lot of the time these terms can be a term of endearment or language shared among fellow autists. most imageboard users would fall somewhere on the spectrum kek, you think we don't realise that?
like cmon literally every other normie site like reddit or twitter would agree with you and have users police themselves and not use terms like that. this is one of the few places you can still freely use those terms, and you choose to be mad about it

No. 1500881

>>1500872
The problem is when people who don't have autism end up using those terms in a disparaging manner. Imageboards have become pretty mainstream in the last ten years, and it's quite common that people find this place from normie social media sites. You can usually tell if someone isn't integrating, and it's those people I'm mad about. I've even added a few anons from the Discord threads on here (inb4 hurdur there's your problem), who most definitely did NOT have autism, and the way they used 'spergy' to talk about behaviour they didn't like made me uncomfortable. The backpedalling when I told them I was actually autistic was funny, until they started treating me differently and acting like I was a child. That and the afore-mentioned lack of integration is what I have a problem with, not typical imageboard autism. Arguably I have a problem with self-hating autistic language too, but I'll concede that that is the most pozzed take to have on the issue.

No. 1500897

>>1500881
nonnie, your day will be a lot more productive if you stop sperging out about this

No. 1501008

I'm very sensitive to noise so I'm constantly wearing eaeplugs but I think it has permanently damaged my ears. So I try to not wear earplugs at all but the noise is too much. The sad part is that the area I live in is relatively quiet but it's still too much for me. I genuinely have no idea how I'm going to cope for the rest of my life
>inb4 noisecancelling headset
it does a great job cancelling ambient sound like traffic noise but I can still hear my upstairs neighbor walking around and talking and using the water

No. 1501019

>>1500881
Cope sperg, maybe people just don’t like you because you’re whiny

No. 1501022

>>1501008
Well I guess in this case, mild ear damage isn’t the worst

No. 1501032

>>1501008
the impact noise has on quality of life is constantly underestimated. when you have even a slightly noisy neighbour or whatever, life can be hell. i finally live in a really peaceful place with a very quiet old lady living downstairs (after years of living with nightmare neighbours and constant building works outside) but am still driven mad by small things a lot. at night, i leave the white noise machine on full blast and often just leave it on during the day too. it's not ideal because it's not exactly…silence but it makes me way less crazy than hearing inconsistent noises outside. i can't wear ear plugs because i find them too uncomfortable and they also make me more aware of internal sounds, like heartbeat, tinnitus, breathing noises.

anyway, i second this >>1501022 fuck the minor ear damage if it means getting some peace.

No. 1501103

>>1501008
I have keloids in my inner ear from wearing earplugs or earbuds too often I feel you.

No. 1501242

>>1500881
People are giving you shit but I understand where you're coming from. It's okay to be upset about it. NTs coopt language from all kinds of marginalized groups and have zero empathy for them, which I think is the spirit behind movements that try to police language on social media. The truth though is that you should just judge those people for being shitty and not for using specific terms, because otherwise it creates the whole wrongthink stuff where people are censored and bullied unless they present in a certain way. Language unfortunately can't be gatekept even if it sucks that dickheads take terms we use for ourselves and misuse them in a cruel way.

No. 1501255

Do any of my fellow ADHD anons have any tips on developing discipline? I'm unmedicated and I'm really struggling, especially when it comes to my more labor intensive hobbies like writing. The more effort something takes, the harder it is for me to actually sit down and do it despite WANTING to do it.

No. 1503142

I just got diagnosed with combined type, and am going to book a follow-up with a psychiatrist to get medicated. I'm going to go through the last few threads but can anyone advise me/spoonfeed what to expect of the process?

I have a therapist I've been seeing for a while, did the diagnostic test with another doctor, and am not medicated for anything right now (but also diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder) and I really need help before I lose my job. I feel really overwhelmed and like I'm racing to try to get my shit together before my life implodes. Thanks in advance nonnies

No. 1503166

>>1501255
Alright so this isn't a perfect method since I struggle with the same issues and it doesn't always work for me. But I've found that it can help to set a deadline and a very concrete goal for the output. For example, I need to have written 5 new pages by midnight next wednesday. Then sure, I'll put it off until the last minute and maybe start out rushing it, but with some luck I'll get legitimately into it along the way and write more than those 5 pages. The only way this actually works for me though is to also tell someone close to you about the deadline, ask them to hold you accountable and show them the work you did once the deadline has passed.
Even if sometimes this will result in rushed, not so great writing, at least you've written something and hopefully gotten into the flow to write more. I find that if there's no third party holding me accountable and I'm the only one that knows about my deadline, that's not enough to get me to do it. It may seem forced or awkward to ask someone to check if you did it, but it's worth trying.

No. 1503880

>>1501255
Planning and being held accountable never worked for me, what I did was learn to be comfortable with being shit. Do the absolute bare minimum, but do it. Half-ass everything. Spewing ten pages of absolute crap when you can't think of anything else to write means you can come back another day, re-read what you shat out, and edit that into something good. Same with things like writing reports, write whatever, edit later. If you can't think of how to get from A to B then write a line in bold saying 'Get from A to B' and then carry on. Remove as many blocks as you can.
If that doesn't work, try writing a list. Put in EVERYTHING you need and want to do, including things like brushing your teeth and getting out of bed. The effect of ticking off items from a list, no matter how retarded, can be the push you need to cross another one off. You can make a list with daily and weekly tasks if you want, then it won't be as overwhelming.

No. 1503980

>>1500850
used to dislike it, but eventually realised it's just culture. it's okay anon.

No. 1503983

Can autistic moids just like. Die off? Autistic women are cringe and annoying at their worst, myself included, and I'm proud of it. Even if they have some secret weird fetish or something it's rare they do anything upon it except for some furry roleplay when they're 15. Autistic men get to harass everyone they want and get coddled for it with "uwu he's just autistic!" Zero responsibility, while girls get demonised for the slightest symptoms. Terfy slight ot ahead but with today's troon cult, they get told that their behaviours and interests differing from the average neurotypical "feminine" girl means they're trans and instead of ever getting a lick of help for their autistic traits, they get encouraged to chop their tits off. What a world.

No. 1505244

I am neurodivergent and have found that using visual guides for my routines helps tremendously. I only found this trick through a random Pinterest recommendation. Now I am trying to get into a regular work out habit. I have the routine ready in a document, with videos and plenty of possible adjustments. It is very structured and super clear. Still, for some reason, it remains a great obstacle and I continuously fail to even complete just one exercise. Any tips for neurodivergency and exercise ambitions? I don’t have to go for the gym for mine, I just need my yoga mat. The exercises also cannot be substituted for something like running or jumping jacks. I also think it would be difficult to break down the exercises in a visual guide. Just any tip would help!

No. 1505336

>>1505244
I write out my sets and duration. So if it’s weight lifting
>4 sets of 10 goblet squats
>4 sets of 10 hammer curls
> so on and so on.
Or in the case of warms up, stretches, and yoga, more on par with your situation. I make the same style list in a notebook (preferably spiral bound so it lays flat and stays on the page you leave it on) and I’ll make little stick people do the basics of the pose or move so I have a visual aid to remember. I find if I divide them up into too many chunks or try to find someone else moving at a different pace than me on video I can’t focus and makes me enjoy it less.

No. 1505337

>>1505336
Samefag but if they don’t have a set number I’ll do the duration so in yogas case
>>Four 30 second counts, 5 deep breathes downward dog.
Then have my little stick person doing two to three little poses of it. Hopefully that makes sense. It sounds dumb typing it out. Kek

No. 1505567

>>1505244
I follow videos with pre-made work out routines I can do at home without equipment, that way I don't have to bother with people being around or looking like a stupid autist for not knowing what I'm doing. I don't bother too much with doing them exactly right, but instead do the closest thing I'm able to. For example I can't do regular push ups but I can do them from my knees instead. Even if I can only do it with 25% of intensity of the video I still consider that better than 0%. I've slowly increased my stamina so I can match the exercises in the video better, it's such a clear difference from before so I'm really stoked about it.

No. 1506062

I officially was diagnosed with autism and adhd today but i am nervous about telling my parents because they might treat me like i am going to die and they are very melodramatic. What do i do? I feel like if i told them i have adhd then everything i do would probably make a ton of sense to them, but they will freak out about autism, that's what i am most afraid of.

No. 1506063

>>1471614
>Apparently I make for good FP fuel and anyone who has been one of those "favorites" knows how much it sucks.

I know I'm way late to this, mainly because I'm just now coming to the realization that I align with everything said here and I'm desperately trying to hold in a panic attack but could someone please explain what this means?

No. 1506066

Is there anything out there in terms of getting diagnosed as an adult? Is my only option really just to have a ton of money for psychs that don't accept any insurance?

No. 1506098

>>1506066
Presuming you live in the us, there might be options. You should talk to a psychatrist who accepts your insurance and they will be able to get you a referal for testing. Luckily a lot of stuff is online and the only thing you would ever have to be in person for is for the testing itself. The wait for the testing is quite long from my experience.

No. 1506100

>>1506098
Samefag, but a lot if places will say they only do children but often they do accomidate for adults, especaily if they are young.

No. 1506121

>>1506063
ayrt hi nonna. I'm not sure which part you want me to explain. If you mean the "Good FP fuel" part, I couldn't tell you why I seem to attract that treatment. If you mean why being a "favorite" person sucks….
FP is an unfair position to be put in. Most of us don't ask for it, and once we're up on that pedestal the only way to go from there is down. You cease to have an authentic relationship with the other person because they're perpetuating a cycle of idealization, (co-)dependence, devaluation, and discard and nothing you do can really stop it from happening. For most of us sperglets this cycle is confusing because all we know is that our so-called "best friend" is mad at us and we can't figure out why because we have a disability that affects our social skills.
I hope you're doing okay. Please don't panic over an lcf post, we're all nonny here!

No. 1506303

>>1506066
>>1506098
Yeah I'm in the US and the trouble is that I am unemployed right now (I have a history of quitting jobs when it becomes too overwhelming) and since insurance is tied to jobs I'm fucked basically

>>1506121
Thank you nonna, my panic stems from me coming to the realization that I have a strong inclination that I'm on the spectrum and I've never been formally diagnosed

No. 1506567

>>1506121
ntayrt but this helped me a lot, ty

No. 1506728

Currently filling out an autism assessment and my score is 9 or 10 out of a maximum of 10. The threshold for further assessment is only 6. I feel like lying and lowering my score because otherwise the doctor might think I’m lying by scoring so high, but then there’s the risk they won’t take me seriously. So I guess it’s better to look like a munchie. I hate this shit already.

No. 1506832

File: 1677121426605.jpeg (37.9 KB, 600x600, 1645244554282.jpeg)

>>1506062
Update, i told my dad and he told me he always thought there was something wrong with me as a child and he just did nothing about it because he thought it would go away. It is what it is. He basically knew the whole time…

No. 1506872

>>1506832
My parents did the same to both me and my brother. My brother still isn’t even diagnosed even though he is VERY obviously autistic/ doesn’t mask. I think a lot of parents did this because they were in denial and uneducated about autism. Don’t feel too bad bc there really wasn’t a lot of information about it in girls and women until more recent years.

Side note, when I told my mom she seriously asked me if I think vaccines caused it. I told her no, maybe microplastics kek.

No. 1508381

I just feel so defeated trying to talk to anyone online these days. I used to be able to make friends no problem in my 20s, but in my 30s it now feels impossible. I'm not online enough, I miss all the bonding moments due to work or family, and I can't explain it but istg zoomers are weirdly exclusionary and don't really give people much of a chance. People my own age are either still talking and acting like it's 2010 or they've got the 'no vacancy' sign up for making more connections.

I honestly just feel so lost. I was told that making friends with other spergs would be easier but I can't seem to find any. Most people claim to be autistic but are perfectly capable of navigating social interaction. And most are big into social fads idgaf about like gender or trooning. How do you nonnas find friends? I would be happy with a tiny group of sperg friends that just shot the shit on discord or streamed stuff and that I could get into things together with. And that wouldn't mind me being socially awkward at times.

No. 1508908

Quick nonnies reasons you're grateful for your autism go!
I'll start: I think being an autist helped me avoid most of the awful behavior that comes from growing up wealthy. I'm not competitive, I don't compromise my ethics like my parents do, I have no interest in signaling status (through objects or activities). There's more but this is already long. Whenever I encounter someone my age from the same socioeconomic upbringing I get uncomfortable because their behavior feels even more alien than the average allistic. Rich kids grown up are majority sociopathic and I genuinely believe the only reason I avoided it is because I was a mega-sperglet (only autist in my family because I'm adopted) who believed my dad's spoken ethics and couldn't imitate how he and mom would compromise those same ethics in action.

No. 1508919

>>1508908
You don't sound like you escaped, sorry to tell you richanon.

No. 1508927

>>1508919
May I ask where my post did that? I didn't really know a way to give examples without sounding full of myself but these are observations I've had throughout adulthood and with people who grew up in the same circumstances I have. Like, my parents do my paperwork behind my back because I won't lie on it like they will to gain an advantage, while people I've talked to tell me I'm nuts for not looking for loopholes. I'm not sure how else to explain that other than ethics, is there a better word I can use?

No. 1509209

I just need to vent. I had to do a presentation in front of a few people (5-6) for one of my college classes yesterday and it went pretty poorly even though I’d prepared for it. I forgot what I was going to say about a minute or so in, panicked, and started crying. I had to leave the room and come back and finish it a few minutes later. My TA said the content of my presentation was great but I’m still unbelievably embarrassed. I’ve almost always had problems with public speaking/performance and I’m getting to the age where I fear it just makes me look immature. Have any of you dealt with a similar issue? I just wish I had a little more control over my emotions. Posting here and not the vent thread because I don’t want to get made fun of in the vent thread and I feel like you nonnies might understand me a little more.

No. 1509216

>>1509209
will you have to continue giving a lot of presentations? not advice exactly but I had the same struggles and am just glad to no longer be in a position where I have to speak in front of people. unless it's something you really want or need to work at, then just try and get through it for now. the fact that you went back in and finished is really brave so you should feel good about that. I've literally run away from presentations before kek.

if it's something you really want to get good at, there are lots of tips and videos online but it will take a lot of practise and probably some further embarrassment until you build the skills or confidence needed to be good at it and push through uncomfortable emotions. for me, it was never something I desired to be good at so I had no motivation to improve but it depends on what you want to do in the future. good luck nona and well done for finishing your presentation.

No. 1509224

>>1508927
Holy shit, I knew some upper middle class people that were urging their son to lie to receive disability and other benefits even though he makes six figures. The parents were both successfully getting max benefits. Meanwhile I was a poorfag and actually disabled but couldn’t get it. I don’t have autism though.

No. 1509242

>>1509224
if you have to get your autistic child to lie on tax forms you're most likely not that rich anyway

No. 1509250

>>1509216
Thank you nonna! It’s something I would really like to get better at as playing piano is one of my biggest passions and it makes me a little sad that I find it so difficult to perform in front of people. I used to have this problem when I had oral/practical music exams in secondary school (I spent two years avoiding them after I broke down in class once kek) but I managed to get over my fear for the actual exams, so I assumed I would be good for the rest of my life. I guess I’m just going to have to brute force my way into confidence. I’m planning on performing at a classical open mic in my college next week as a way of forcing myself to become more comfortable performing. The crowd will be small and some of my closest friends, who are all extremely supportive, will be there, so I’m hoping all will be well.

No. 1509255

>>1509224
wtf how!? he's making figures that means he's got a job, right?

No. 1509261

>>1509224
I would've reported them

No. 1509290

>>1509224
Sounds fake, how tf could someone get on disability while working full time, let alone making 6 figures? You'd need a full separate fake identity for it to work, and if you're already making 6 figures the risk of getting caught just exponentially outweighs any income you could get from disability.

No. 1509296

>>1509290
It’s possible by lying and being a veteran

No. 1509301

>>1508927
ayrt I'm going to sperg for a moment and write a small essay about this, because as a fellow autist I feel like no one ever points out stuff to help us communicate more effectively in a constructive way. These are just my opinions so don't feel pressured to absorb them or anything nonna.

Just being real, it was mostly the tone that came across when you talked about your upbringing. The economic disparity (in America at least) is pretty awful right now for one, so talking about growing up with any kind of wealth puts a target on your back immediately. It's not fair how anyone chose to be born or grow up, it's just reality that most people are not wealthy and most people do not want to hear about how you didn't have to suffer in the ways they did.

Two your tone, which is the words you chose and how you structured them in your sentences, is a bit self-centered in a naive way. It sounds a little immature. Your post is a blogpost which is ok, but it's all about showing off what a better person you are, how you grew up wealthy but are not like those other wealthy kids. People in general won't relate to that because most people are poor and have a lot more going on in their lives than navel gazing about their own personalities.

I'm glad you escaped being a shitheel though nonny, I'm honestly not trying to tear you down and I'm very glad you aren't trying to follow in your parents footsteps.

No. 1509330

>>1509301
Oh, you're absolutely right, I can totally see how my post came off bad after reading your reply and will try to do better next time. Genuinely thank you nonna!

No. 1509624

>>1506832
late but my parents recently did the same thing to me. i haven’t told them yet about the autism but they dropped a huge bomb by telling me i was delayed (in many ways) as a child and just didn’t do anything about it. they clearly knew something was wrong but decided to “wait it out” because they thought i was stubborn. they’ve talked about it before with me but i always thought they were joking because of how they phrased it.
i haven’t told them yet because i know they’re going to say something stupid when i do.

No. 1510861

Does anyone have any experience with white noise machines and autism? I'm considering getting one to drawn out outside noise but I don't know if they actually help if you have autism

No. 1510884

>>1510861
I just happened to read this as I was scrolling to the bottom, I don't have autism so idk but there's white noise apps and videos on youtube, maybe you can use those to test if it's helpful for you?

No. 1510966

>>1510884
I have used some white noise youtube videos and those helped. I want a white noise machine to play noise at night since I don't like having my phone running a video all night

No. 1510980

File: 1677529569603.png (676.87 KB, 720x1440, unnamed.png)

>>1510966
nta but there are apps for that too, with a bunch of settings and different noises. i use picrel, and the trick to not getting ads is to turn off wi-fi. i use an old phone that's hooked up to speakers. if you have an old phone that still works and speakers you don't have to buy an extra thing. same as the other anon though, got no answer for your question just sharing what i use, it helps me sleep since i have shitty neighbours.

No. 1511014

>>1508908
You're not competitive because you don't have to, you already live comfortably and your parents are fine with enabling you for the rest of your life, you're not sociopathic because your parents probably aren't, congratulations I guess? The absolute state of wealthy people, self congratulating for not being sociopaths.

No. 1511086

>>1510861
I have an air purifier that I use for allergies and it doubles up as a white noise machine, if you put it on one of the higher settings. I love it and really helps me sleep. I do think it's worth getting something other than laptop or phone because it's kind of a pain if the video or file runs out or if you need to use them for something else. But when I'm working at my PC and it's noisy outside I just put some white noise on youtube for background noise because it's more convenient.

No. 1511540

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ig this could go in fake disorder cringe but i wanted to talk about this with other autists. does anyone else get super irritated by clear autismfakers? i roll my eyes every time i see some woman (usually some flavor of gendie) go "i collect things im soooo autistic!!!" despite it clearly never actually affecting their lives.
the intricate makeup on the daily is such a huge red flag that they're faking considering makeup is sensory hell.
maybe i'm just an extra peg down on the spectrum, but as someone who has given themself concussions from hurting myself during sensory meltdowns, has struggled with an autism related eating disorder my whole life, and gets instantly shunned from most social situations before i even speak due to my "autism stare", it hurts to see so many people use the disorder that ruins my life to clout-chase.

No. 1511550

>>1510861
can't say if it helps with autism, but I have a constant low-frequency humming noise in my flat and can't sleep because of it. So I bought myself a portable radio with battery pack, can be recharged via usb and most important, it has a sd memory card slot. I just downloaded what I wanted as background noise from youtube (rain, wind, waves, spaceship sounds, etc) and put it on the card. I don't like having my phone on at night and the white noise machines had too limited options and sounds for my taste (I can't stand fan or vacuuming sounds). It helps me to get a little bit of sleep and maybe that would be an alternative for you, too.

No. 1511669

>>1511540 not everyone has your sensory issues though, kek

No. 1511700

File: 1677614177306.jpeg (Spoiler Image,54.74 KB, 618x613, 72894E37-C776-49D6-B228-87DE09…)

Anyone else get diagnosed when they were young but don’t really experience the negative effects of autism all that much?Maybe I’m just ignorant of how autistic I look, but I think I pass as neurotypical for the most part without ever masking. Even when I get clocked as autistic it doesn’t really effect me. My main symptoms are that I sometimes make weird gestures with my hands, make weird facial expressions when I’m thinking to myself, talk to myself a fair bit but that’s probably my only ‘visible’ signs and most people dont comment on it. I’m also preoccupied with a narrow range of interests too ig but never felt the need to infodump in years and I’m definitely capable of having conversations outside the of my interests (don’t need to make scripts). I don’t experience any sensory issues aside from feeling overwhelmed by the firework shows and loud parades my parents used to take me to as a kid. One of my friends, who also suffers from autism, said she wouldn’t tell immediately but another student one of my friends was able to clock that I had autism after knowing me for a couple of months so idk. My mother says that my autism is very obvious, but she has weird ideas about what constitutes a symptom of autism. One time I tried to discuss this with her, and she said that me trying to explain why I think I’m right about things is somehow a symptom of autism

No. 1511707

Anyone else get sleepy when overstimulated? Just had the worst experience somewhere I was trapped in for an hour. It was hot, the flourescents were flickering and the people were extremely loud and annoying. I was going to do other stuff today but by the time I got out of there I felt like falling asleep. I had gotten so worked up just holding my shit together it's like when I can finally relax and feel relief free in my car it's like I'm ready for bed. I used to feel the same way at school I would get really overwhelmed with all the loud rowdy shit going on and fall asleep at my desk

No. 1511730

>>1511669
NTA Yes but some form of sensory issues are normally a part of autism. Do you also walk up and tell people the grass is green and they breathe air?

No. 1511756

>>1511540
tbh these autism fakers made me really nervous about asking the doctors for a diagnosis. I was paranoid that i might be the 100th person who clearly doesn't have autism trying to squeeze a diagnosis out of them. From my experience, i literally cannot tell what all my symptoms are because i've gone so long being undiagnosed and i've only had the ones that make others around me annoyed be pointed out. I do feel like i have sensory issues to some extent, but then again, i legitimately don't have the sense of self awareness to ever really know if there are things that are normal about me or if everyone goes through it, which makes videos like this completely useless imo. Idk if anybody can relate to it or not. But about the sensory issues, tbh makeup doesn't bother that much, i actually really enjoy the sensation of lipgloss.

No. 1511760

>>1511730
it looks like to me every autist has some sensory issue, strong or not (I know three autistic people, only one of them gets triggered very easy with sensory issues, the others just know how to cope better/avoid the situations that cause it) but every autist LARPer amps it up 10 times because it's the easiest symptom you can fake

No. 1511775

>>1511760
there are those that are hypersensitive and those that lack it to an absurd degree, and usually seek out more sensory input. my ex is also autistic but was totally dulled to so many things I (and most people) would find horrifying. he would just walk around barefoot outside and not notice if something was stuck to him or annoying noises, didn't notice the cold or heat. he would just fall asleep easily with a car alarm blaring outside for example. but he would be attracted to high levels of stimuli as a result. i think both are common.

>>1511540
i think the thing that makes me suspicious is when someone's entire identity is based around how autistic they are. if you want to be an eccentric, then just do that, but it's got nothing to do with autism.

No. 1512627

Reposting here because I wonder if anyone can relate

I've had a phase where'd I'd reject my autism diagnosis. I'd recognise I exhibit the symptoms, but I'd blame many other things. Through recent experiments with solving recurring problems in my life, I discovered that approaching them through the lense of autism has reaped the most benefits. This inspired me to consider my life through this lense further and reassess the way I perceive it. I recognised that some interpersonal struggles I had been having were due to my very real sensitivity to abrupt change and a lack of structure, which lead me to raise the topic among the people around me, including my boyfriend. He has been complaining a little about my high sensitivity. I am aware life is unpredictable and I am constantly developing coping mechanisms. What's important is that the people around me understand what those mechanisms are so they can understand and respect my choices (i.e. my need to finish a routine and not be disturbed during it). It saddens me that he has such a hard time accepting my sensitivities and the fact that it's very real and important to me. That my reaction to abrupt changes and surprises is the same as if someone kicked me in the leg. I am not sure whatsoever how to help him understand me better and grow more comfortable and understanding toward my neurodivergency. I think because we started dating before I myself really began to accept my autism again, he doesn't see it as strongly as a part of my identity as I now do. It makes sense because that's how he got to know me. But now I don't know how to convey the realisations I've made and the experiences I have any better than I already have. It's something that time will have to work on…

No. 1512704

>>1511540
I hate them, and it drives me nuts because these are the same people who made fun of my aspergers when I was in school. Fuck these retards.

No. 1513492

>>1511756
I would still go and try for it nonna. Social media is an awful representation of actual autistic people because it's full of larpers that are only copying each other and have no idea what autism really is. Someone mentioned it here in the last thread, but the aspergirls subreddit I've found is a little better to try and see if you relate to any of the stories there. It helped me realize I was on the spectrum, anyway. And honestly not every sperg has the same sensory issues. For example I'm a sound autist that has issues with sounds, but I don't have any issue whatsoever with food (which is a more classic autism thing).

No. 1513503

>>1450323
how are so many of you able to be NEET? even if I wanted to I'd end up a homeless bum. must be nice having people to support you being useless!

No. 1513645

>>1513503
do any of the NEETs here seem happy about their situations? retard.

No. 1513666

>>1513492
>aspergirls subreddit
>check out this subreddit, assuming it's specifically for women with autism
>recent popular posts have nothing to do with autism in women specifically, to the point where I think I've misread the subreddit name (is it asperGIRLS or aspergIRLS?)
>subreddit description has no mention of it being for autistic women, despite the name
>look at top posts of all time, find posts from 1-2+ years ago where autism in women was actually being discussed
>find newer posts asking "if trans women are welcome too"
>check wayback machine, find out that the subreddit indeed was specifically meant for autistic women at some point
>now it's a catch all autism subreddit, no different from the other ones

it's all so fucking tiresome

No. 1513831

>>1513666
Men demand all attention at all times even the autistic ones. How dare disabled women who are mostly overlooked their entire life for their male counterparts have their own space to talk?

No. 1513852

>>1513666
r/autisminwomen might be a little better but it’s still full of Reddit retards

No. 1514001

>>1513666
reminder that all subreddits aimed at women (or "girls"..) are 95% troons/creeps. actuallesbians, twoxchromosomes, witchesvspatriarchy etc are all troon pandering subreddits that stereotype women and in aspergirls case - autistic people and just exist for larping and shutting down any conversation that has anything to do with actual women-only experiences.

also i noticed that the broader category subreddits, particularly the meme ones like r/meirl have the exact same relatable content that the austim subreddits do kek. it makes me laugh because MOST people can relate to being awkward sometimes or hating loud noises, for example. everyone likes to believe they are special in some way.

I think the facebook groups are better generally, not sure if it's just the ones in my country (UK) but you can tell there are a lot of real autistic women who need help with day to day things like making phone calls, filling in forms instead of narcissistic blogging about how quirky they are. there is also a group for Gender Critical Autistics (that's the group name) for those who are fed up of all the other groups being overrun by gender shite.

No. 1514236

Oh hi just popping in to ask WHY IS DRIVING IMPOSSIBLE?!!! I can't focus on so many things at once and move my legs and arms correctly at the same time. I have a hard time remembering which pedal is gas and which is break. And I'm supposed to look other drivers in the eye at the same time? Fuck off.

I can't socialize, I can't have romantic relationships, I can't keep a job without having a meltdown after a month from too many people so can I please drive? Can I please just have ONE adult thing?

No. 1514258

>>1514236
this is why I don't even want to learn how to drive. I'm 30 now and don't plan on ever driving, as long as I can get away with it (living in a place with decent public transport).

No. 1514265

>>1514258
I fell for the "it'll come to you eventually" meme AGAIN because people kept telling me that about driving. But as a teen they'd tell me the exact same thing about dating, developing social skills and becoming less shy and anxious. I never fucking learn, 90% of things DON'T come naturally to me. It just did for them, so they assume it's the same for me. Normal people talk to me like they put in the same amount of work as me, but they didn't. It's like someone with a singing voice like Adele telling a frog-voiced Aiden to just try harder and they can sing well too.

No. 1514296

>>1513492
Oh no don't worry, I got my diagnosis and i 100% have both autism and adhd. I definitely regret taking social media too seriously on that and should have stuck to what actual good sources think.

>>1514236
Learning to drive was a hassle and even then it tooks me months to stop feeling so anxious enough to not go on the highway. I still can't drive for more than an hour without getting mentally exhausted. What was really frustrating to me was that a driving instructor i had was really hard on me for behaving anxiously and i had to hold back my tears. But according to a psychiatrist, it's pretty normal for autistic people to struggle with driving, she was impressed that i could even pull it off. If i had a choice i would not drive at all, i'd rather just sit next to a sketchy moid than stress myself out with a car.

No. 1514302

>>1514265
The "i'll come to you eventually" meme is why i was only diagnosed as an adult because my dad thought my autism would go away, then he wondered why it has taken me years to finish higher education because i was trying to do it with unmedicated adhd they could have found when i was a child. Normies will never get it.

No. 1514325

>>1514265
>>1514302
the it'll-come-to-you-eventually meme is such a classic. it's the reason i got into an abusive relationship with a man for 2 years (because my gut telling me to run was just me "not opening my heart fully" or just getting used to being in my first relationship and things would start to feel better) and why i burned myself out trying to make friends and have a "real" career. turns out i'm happiest on my own in a low-stress data entry job (people still give me shit for the opportunities I gave up and insist it's some complex i have about lacking self belief) and no - I still don't want kids, 10 years after I was told I would change my mind and I still have no interest in learning to drive.

there is a template for life that people assume everyone else wants, and any resistance to it is automatically chalked up to lack of confidence or fear, instead of choice or (sometimes) inability. unfortunately it's taken me til my thirties to have the confidence to assert my desires and limitations because i kept buying into the one day i'll be a proper adult and i just need to push through all these things that don't feel right to me bullshit for my entire teens and twenties.

It's good to question your resistance sometimes but it should always be on your terms because only you know what works for you. normies love to make everything seem easy and natural so we can end up internalising the belief that we don't try hard enough, when really it's probably the opposite.

No. 1514350

Oh wow. I'm the nonna that suggested the aspergirls subreddit. I admit I haven't visited it since the previous thread. Back when I did browse it the subforum was indeed much smaller and the people in it were a bit more genuine, and the experiences I read from people there did help me put the pieces together to figuring out why my life has been the way it is. My bad.

>>1514296
Happy for your diagnosis nonna! I hope wherever you are you can get benefits or accommodations.

>>1514236
Oh non… KEK I also mixed up the gas and break pedals for a long time while I was learning how to drive, among other stuff like turning the wrong way, having trouble judging turns or where the car is in space… I like driving now, but it has legit taken me 10+ years to get comfortable operating a vehicle and my confidence was nearly shattered a few times. Don't know why but I was very stubborn about not giving up. I wish you luck.

No. 1514367

>>1503142
I got prescribed concerta- my psychiatrist was really understanding and took my concerns seriously. Starting it tomorrow morning and seeing her again in a week- I had a really bad reaction to Prozac in the past, so I’m really paranoid about trying new prescriptions now. I know they’re an entirely different class of drugs, but can anyone make me feel less freaked? I’m really nervous about my depression and anxiety getting worse

No. 1514714

>>1514236
Driving can be hard for anyone especially autistic people. You’re doing okay anon. I use counter sensory in the car to help cope with the stress. So music with a tempo that moves with my thoughts but has a positive or upbeat sound. (I have a playlist, because commercials on the radio stress me out and as a teen learning to drive I’d have to pull over sometimes.) Cool air on low or if it’s really cold heat on feet and window cracked. It’s not illegal where I’m at to drive barefoot so I do, it makes me have an easier time since the peddles have different shapes and I can be more aware kind of how much pressure I’m using. Do you struggle with directional sense? That was one of the things that really stresses me out so using navigation for any drive for the first few months when it’s a new place helps me a lot. Maybe something in that helps you?

No. 1514781

File: 1677948327808.jpg (259.73 KB, 1600x1167, schleich-animals-toys.jpg)

I haven't been diagnosed but when it comes to people who actually know me, they think it's very likely I'm autistic. in regards to the driving conversation, driving has always made me quite nervous. I've always found other things to blame though. like having astigmatism and needing proper glasses and anxiety caused by getting in a wreak. the wreak definitely didn't help, and I probably shouldn't be allowed to drive at night unless this is something glasses can fix, but for social shit sometimes I ask myself if I'm autistic or if it's just due to having been homeschooled for 12 years and the trauma from that (homeschooling is a very great way to hide abuse where I live). maybe that's why i can hardly look anyone in the eye! somehow I went to college. lies were involved to get in. and I dropped out when I really only needed one more semester but the whole covid isolation thing really fucked me up because it threw me back into homeschool brain. usually i just tell myself it's the shit i actually have been diagnosed with (ADHD, PTSD, and the very questionable bipolar) but also one day at the retail job I've miraculously held down for some months I didn't really know what I was supposed to do, so i sat on the floor organizing the little animal figure display and had the grandest time just lining up the little animals.
now i realize i just sound like an idiot typing all this but thank you to anyone who reads my pointless thoughts

No. 1514878

>>1513645
They should be happier. they are so lucky they have people to take care of them, support them and likely understand them. I wish I had that

No. 1515052

>>1514367
I'll stop live texting my medication progress if it's just clogging up- I don't have any female friends that can relate, but it's jarring how much it helped with my anxiety and depression immediately. My ADHD stuff wasn't affected and the worst symptoms were still there the entire time (distractability, extreme lack of motivation and focus, and constant motion), I didn't "feel" anything until like 2pm and I took it at 9am, and that was more just brief moments of contentedness/happiness I couldn't really explain.

Just sucks that so many doctors didn't listen to me when I said antidepressants weren't right for me or my problem, they kept shoving them at me until I shelled out $500 for a test, but moids get diagnosed instantly. I was told I was just depressed and needed to medicate that, but it was ADHD symptoms making me anxious and fearful and thus depressing me. Fucking sucks that lack of emotional regulation and physical regulation is normalized for men and means it's a whole other treatment, but women just need to feel less. Both doctors that prescribed me anti depressants were men, I refuse to talk to another male provider.

No. 1515062

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>>1515052
>>1514367
>nonny takes legal meth for the first time
>feels fantastic, so long depresso

No shit nonna. Make sure to drink tons of water and apply sunscreen every 2 hours, just because you have ADHD doesn’t mean stimulants won’t result in premature aging. Anyway you sound like me when I was first given traditional stimulants for my ADHD, the first few months are so productive and euphoric. Then after a while you’ll be on the highest dose possible and take it and fall back asleep right after and maybe develop a skin picking disorder and extreme tachycardia.

No. 1515068

>>1515062
tbh I didn't know about the skin concerns, I have a routine I've been sticking to and am good about hydration so appreciate you bringing that up even if it was kind of cunty. Hope you're in an okay place with your medication now

No. 1515078

>>1515068
Sorry for being cunty nonny, I’ve just seen the same stimmy song and dance happen with every ADHD bitch I know, including myself. First you start the stimulant and it’s like somebody waved a magic wand and everything is better even if your symptoms aren’t actually being helped that much, you feel so damn good cause duh, it’s a powerful stimulant you’re taking. And then people will say stimulants are bad for you even if you have adhd, and you wanna shiv them because how dare they suggest you shouldn’t get this medication that’s finally making you feel like life’s worth living and that you’re a whole ass cool person for the first time in forever? That’s the honeymoon phase with stimulants, can last for a few years depending on how you tolerate them. But eventually it all comes crashing down when eventually all the stimulants stop working and they don’t give you any of that happy yum yum dopamine serotonin cocktail anymore. Never known anyone to stay on stimulants for more than a few years before they realize what a racket they are, or they’re forced to stop because of physical issues caused by the stimulants. I truly don’t believe stimulants can safely be used on a daily long term basis.

No. 1515081

>>1515078
Nta but absolutely. The burn out happened to me in about a year. By the end I was a fucking zombie, constant suicidal ideation, I had to be hospitalized, obsessive thoughts, lost way too much weight, etc. But those first couple of months were so productive. I was so sure I was cured kek. It took me months after getting off of them to be able to laugh again. I had to relearn how to be a person again. No bueno.

No. 1515082

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>>1515078
Samefag but there’s literally only one “stimulant” that, after studying the pharmacology of it, I believe can safely be used on a long term daily basis, but its usage for ADHD is off label. Modafanil aka provigil.

>https://www.vice.com/en/article/ava7za/why-cant-we-all-take-modafinil

No. 1515085

>>1515078
>>1515081
>>1515082
It's all good- I'm excited to feel better for now, but I appreciate you both being realistic and reminding me that just because it makes me feel better doesn't mean it's safe despite it being prescribed and normalized. I'm so used to bracing for things to make me feel worse, or have an unexpected reaction, that it working the way I was told it would made me feel relief and comfort. I'm screenshotting these for later, ty both again

No. 1515164

>>1515082
I agree with you. I was wondering if you know what I should say to my doctor to try and get modafinil? My mom used to have it prescribed but idk how but she’s been prescribed everything under the sun at some point. I always feel worried about being invalidated by doctors if I ask for a specific drug.

No. 1515381

>>1515164
I first got my modafanil script from a fancy neurologist after a car accident. I asked him for it, reasoning that I’d been extra tired since the accident and had tried adderall for adhd in the past and it made me an anxious mess. Said I researched alternatives and stumbled upon modafanil and asked what he thought. He said it’s very well tolerated and he doesn’t see the dependence or other serious side effects he sees from other stimulants, the side effect and safety profiles of modafanil being far better than the alternatives.

Then I told my primary care doctor hey look, this medicine helps me a bunch but this neuro doesn’t take my insurance now that it’s not being covered by the auto insurance - will you prescribe it for me? And she asked me a lot of questions about the medication cause she’d never really heard of it. Be knowledgeable about it. I have to go see her every month for it because office policy against giving refills for controlled substances without an office visit (meanwhile the neuro would give me 6 refills at a time kek) And my insurance doesn’t cover the cost of the meds themselves - I have to pay out of pocket cause I’m using it off label - lame cause otherwise all my scripts are an affordable $0 with my insurance. Thankfully with goodrx I can get a months worth for under $20 at like, any pharmacy besides CVS and Walgreens, where it’s like $200 even with goodrx?! I just hope they never jack up the prices.

No. 1515489

>>1515078
I've been taking 50mg Vyvanse daily for the past 6 years and it still helps me just as much as it did when I first started taking it. My body refuses to build up a tolerance to Vyvanse or something.

No. 1517106

File: 1678193735529.jpeg (21.75 KB, 236x301, moomin.jpeg)

can we share some things that help us manage?

the main things I struggle with are social situations, hypersensitivity and executive dysfunction. the list below won’t be helpful for everyone, it’s just things from my own experience:

>a couple of years ago I started making an indexable book (folder with tabs) with information on how to do certain things

like step-by-step instructions on who to call or what to say if something goes wrong. i’m trying to inb4 a lot of scenarios that i worry about in the background of my mind and organise how to deal with them. It’s also got phone numbers, email addresses and websites I might need to use for appointments and paying bills etc. so I don’t get lost and paralysed. i’ve even thought about making mini “scripts” of what I need to say in certain situations kek. (is this too crazy? i dunno)
>white noise machine (plus white/pink/brown noise youtube vids)
>learning to love being alone
i always liked being alone but kept trying to be normal and make friends even though it made me miserable. once i accepted that i’m not the friend-making type, i began to look at life differently and enjoy my time a lot more. living alone is a luxury that i’ve only been able to afford in the past few years but i love it.
>getting a work from home job
another luxury but nice work if you can get it
>keeping lots of storage boxes and bins within reach, around the house
when i just need to tidy a space but feel paralysed, i can just put everything into the box to sort when i have more mental space, which at least clears clutter and makes me feel better. plus having actual bins in every room to put trash in.
>meal planning
personally i eat way healthier and feel less stressed about having to cook and clean as much when i batch cook food for the week. it can become a bit of a fun obsession too - finding recipes to try and cute bento boxes to buy.
>worrying less about social norms and being impolite
at my peak people-pleasing self, i still said the wrong things and people still thought i was awkward so i’ve learned it doesn’t help to bend over backwards to be accommodating, it actually makes things a lot worse (burnout) and the same gesture is rarely returned. say no if you don’t want to do something or if it makes you uncomfortable and don’t explain yourself. people get offended over the stupidest shit (like if you don’t want to try their food or attend a big party) not suggesting to take this to an extreme or obnoxious level but just talking about setting boundaries.

what are some things that help you with aspects of ASD or ADHD?

No. 1518230

>>1515164
Wondering this too. I didn't really get into an accident like the other nonny, but was prescribed it a long time ago and it helped me with my issues a lot–and then I was displaced and wasn't able to get more.

No. 1518238

File: 1678300464833.jpg (349.75 KB, 2048x2048, catbento.jpg)

>>1517106
This is a nice post nona!
When I was still working I also did meal prep. It was fun putting everything in the bento boxes… Everything looks more tasty inside of those!!

Unfortunately, I don't have any strategies to share since most of my coping mechanisms crumbled after my last breakdown.

No. 1518255

>>1517106
I guess this is for something hyper specific, but social media and interacting with people always stressed me out, so what I do is I always set a time limit for myself. Like, actually set a timer if I want to be on Tumblr or something and when the timer is up I turn Tumblr off. Also, I refuse to check email after 6PM. I noticed unplugging myself, so to speak, from online shit helps me feel so much better. I love really strict scheduling, though.

No. 1518268

>>1488500
I'm not super consistent with taking it. I skip at least 1 day a week, if not 2 or 3. Over the ten years, I have stopped taking it for weeks at a time probably more than a dozen times. I think a few times I've stopped it for months. I'm prescribed 4 x 10mg (short acting) tablets a day but I normally take only 1 or 2. If I take 4 there is no difference except I might get more physical anxiety. I always tell my psych that it works well for me because it is difficult to get prescribed the short acting tablets where I am from and I'm nervous that if I get taken off them I won't be able to go back on, and I'm nervous about complaining in any way in case they decide I'm better off unmedicated. I like to have the meds as a security blanket even if they don't work that well. But that's probably extremely retarded since they're not that great anyway and I should just be honest to get better help. It's not possible to get adderall here at all though and I don't know that much about other medication.
(Sorry for such a late reply nonnie!)

No. 1518307

>>1517106
>that first tip
Welp, I know what I'll be setting up in the near future. Thanks nona.

No. 1518325

File: 1678304535810.jpg (152.46 KB, 800x500, Japanese-Bento.jpg)

Idk if it's related to anything but does anyone else hate when there food touches other food? I love to keep things sperated and never mix things.

No. 1518645

>>1515052
Was the 500$ for the Connors Test with the two shape tests?

No. 1518891

>>1518325
Yes absolutely, I was like this as a kid and got made fun of by my parents all the time for wanting to have foods that wouldn't easily stay apart from the rest on separate plates. I got over it as I grew up though, I think it's because nowadays I mostly cook food that's meant to all be mixed together like pastas or salads. I think the way it's all separated and tidy is what attracted me to sushi to begin with though, seeing your pic, and it remains my favorite food to this day.

I used to be a bigtime picky eater, especially when it came to textures. It's weird because now I genuinely like many things I would have found afwul back then, but at the same time I can still remember how excruciating it felt to me as a kid to have to eat all these things. Sure, picky eaters can be very annoying, especially when they're adults, but I'll always sympathize with them because nobody would willingly choose to have such an aversion to so many foods. It's different from just thinking something isn't great.

No. 1518930

Being conventionally attractive and most likely being an adhd aspie is hard. People expect me to have good social skills and act idk "popular" and confident. So in social setting people often come up to talk to me and try to talk and I'm not what they expect at all and it gets really awkward. I'm weird, have selective mutism and either super deadpan/quiet or overly excited and all over the place. lol. I know I give people major uncanney valley.


Its also really annoying knowing good social rules in theory, but in practice just being an awkward mute mess. Like I know what to do and say, but irl I just get too overwhelmed and anxious. Its like watching myself out of body fuck up every time, even though I know what to do and say, I just cant do it. Which is also makes meeting people embarrassing bc I act perfectly normal over text, then I'm really weird irl.

No. 1518958

>>1518255
i love strict scheduling too! I haven't been able to apply that to the internet though unfortunately. i don't use social media but i just look at random shit constantly when there are better things i could be doing. i might try the timer thing and see how my brain responds…

>I refuse to check my email after 6pm

this has become easy for me because i'm scared of my email kek. i only check it when i feel strong enough to deal with shit (just in case one of the emails is an unexpected bill or problem i have to deal with). it's the same reason i turned off notifications on my phone except for emergency calls, because i can't handle it otherwise.

No. 1519074

File: 1678373863870.jpg (65.18 KB, 620x764, 0ef341497d73ce247ed41c755f0589…)

Tips for dealing with a realllly bad procrastination habit?

I procrastinate everything from doing the laundry to doing my hobbies. I cannot seem to do anything that requires even a bit of an effort. I used to use timers and productivity apps and bulletjournals and all that but I after a month or so this habit inevitably falls apart and I cannot keep it up. What do you guys use that helps you get stuff done and/or how do you motivate yourself?

No. 1519076

>>1518930
People talking to you doesn't mean you're attractive, a lot of extroverts try to talk to awkward people like you so you guys don't feel left out, I did it a lot in the past where I'd try to get weirdos involved in conversations so they weren't sad.

No. 1519081

>>1519076
Thus making them sadder.

No. 1519096

>>1519074
I struggle with it too. so far, the only thing I can get myself to stick to is cleaning the dishes every night without fail. i have a rule that the only time i listen to a certain podcast or audiobook that i enjoy, is when i'm doing the dishes. so when i want to listen to it, i am motivated to do the dishes. it's been part of my routine for over a year now and it's actually made me enjoy washing up kek. could you apply something similar to your chores? sometimes i use high-energy music to motivate me too.

these are really my only tricks though and i really wish i could find more focus for my hobbies and general housekeeping.

No. 1519298

>>1519076
Sorry I am objectively pretty, like stopped in the street to be told I'm pretty-pretty. I dont get why find it so hard to believe attractive people use this site lmao. Sorry you're ugly or something and feel better by hating on an anonymous imageboard.

No. 1519308

>>1519298
I believe that you're pretty but what did you mean by "most likely being an adhd aspie" – did you self diagnose? sounds like you're shy and awkward but why do you think you're autistic? (like, don't steal aspie valor just because you spill your spaghetti)

No. 1519316

>>1519308
*sorry not autistic, "adhd aspie". don't know why I typed autistic, braindead moment.

No. 1519362

File: 1678391890386.jpg (94 KB, 1080x810, 2jille.jpg)

sorry for the negativity but I feel like autism robbed me of my life. why was i born with this disorder i wanna be a normie sooo bad I know that tons of autistic people go on and live fullfilling lives but I'm not one of them

No. 1519376

>>1519074
have you heard of the term demand avoidance? maybe looking into that will help you find some leads.

i have a problem with procrastination too and i understand it has to do with anxiety and feeling lack of control over my situation and emotions. i think reminding yourself how satisifying and good it feels to be productive and get things done and that you want to do so is helpful. i realized i do not gain genuine enjoyment no matter what i do while procrastinating because it all is stewing in my anxiety. if you put off doing your hobbies and important tasks, maybe just starting to try to get into a habit of doing your hobbies and seeing how satisfying it is to do something you said you would. becoming someone you can trust to do things takes time so don't expect change overnight. also, look at how you procrastinate. social media? remind yourself these sites are simply addictive and not meaningfully satisfying, and have diminishing returns past very basic value they add with minor regular use.

No. 1519505

File: 1678401090594.jpg (47.57 KB, 539x391, cat.jpg)

For those with ASD, ADHD, ADD: how did your issues (sensory, social, wtv) evolved over time? Have you become more functional over time, or have you devolded? If you use coping strategies are they always useful or do you find them to become less efficient over time?

No. 1519525

>>1519505
probably because im a neet now so im rarely in situations that are overwhelming anymore but it doesnt bother me that much anymore, the only times i really get sensory overload these days are from my boyfriend grabbing on me too much and not letting me go. he thought we were just wrestling until i started crying one time because its really hard for me to vocalize when im overloaded kek. for the most part i just avoid being around loud people.

No. 1519535

File: 1678402402282.jpeg (23.76 KB, 832x555, cat hug.jpeg)

>>1519362
let it out nona! not everyone can be the quirky but high functioning austist that is always romanticised. a lot of people are severely crippled by it so try not to compare yourself to normies cos they don't have to deal with this shit. sending a hug (if you want one)

No. 1519979

>>1519362
You can let it out. It’s okay nonnie. Even us “high functioning” autistic people get negative and feel like autism took stuff from us. It impacts us and it makes shit hard. It’s okay to admit a disability is that and not a super power, despite what the normies push, and grieve for the things it made more difficult. I hope you find peace and comfort. ♥

No. 1520036

Does anyone else ever latch onto one joke and think it's hilarious even after other people don't think it's funny anymore? It makes me sad but people have gotten legitimately upset at me because "it's not funny anymore"

No. 1520670

>>1519505
My adhd is absolutely atrocious and I wonder if one day it will evolve into something worse. I already have issues with short term memory and lately i've been leaving my key in the door or being careless with it. As for sensory, idk if i ever have/had any or not. It's one of those things where idk if it's just me or if everyone experiences the same shit as me. Socially? I've regressed. Because i wasn't diagnosed as a child, it really crippled me. Imo, if my parents got me treatment i would be pretty close to being a normie right now imo. Instead i am an extreme recluse and I have never initiated a conversation in my life. I will be completely quiet if i am never promoted being i literally have no desire to talk to anybody and idk what the criteria is for somebody to be deemed as interesting or worthy of being approached. I've always been confused how people decide who their friends are just out in the wild without knowing anything about them first. I feel like in terms of autism, this is the area where i am the most crippled and I actually feel it. I used to think i had social anxiety, but i don't feel anxiety at all. I just live life like nobody exists because tbh i just don't understand why i have to care about them and i don't understand why they are concerned with me. people are just "there" to me.

No. 1520786

File: 1678526172246.gif (7.35 KB, 107x61, animated-health-image-0006.gif)

has anyone else with ADHD stopped taking stimulants and if so, what were your experiences like?

I was on 20mg dexamphetamine daily, there was a supplier issue in my city in January and I decided to just stop taking them for a while. It's been two months but I'm having trouble focusing again and I keep gaining weight despite no change in diet.

I don't want to go back on them and I feel like towards the end of my time using them they were doig nothing for me but it's frustrating

No. 1520808

>>1519376
I checked it out, haven't heard of it before. I used to feel resentment over people asking me to do things (mostly in a work setting) and would procrastinate endlessly, but I feel like I mostly got over it. I do procrastinate if the task feels complex or overwhelming though.

The ridiculous thing about my hobbies is that once I get over the initial procrastination phase, I genuinely enjoy them and get that 'being in the zone' feeling. But despite this I still have to fight myself and get over that every single time

No. 1521422

I know that hyper fixation and special interests are terms mostly associated with tumblr, twitter and tiktok but does anyone else feel like it really does apply to them? I often get obsessed with something for months where it's literally the only thing I can think about and want to talk about. I never really had a special interest where it lasted years and I researched it in depth but I do get fixations/obsessyions where I will do nothing but indulge in it for months and then out of nowhere lose interest in it and then never interact with it again. Though I'm not sure if this is an autism thing or not does anyone else relate?

No. 1521591

>>1519505
i feel like it fluctuates with my other disorders, so when i'm highly manic or depressive my senses are prickly. once i was so so social and bubbly and my adhd tendencies were to great advantage, these days they drive me up the wall, especially when my mood worsens or i split. thank you isolation and trauma resurgence

No. 1521708

>>1521422
yeah, I can't focus on multiple things at once, so when I'm interested in something it becomes pretty much the only thing i'm interested in and the only thing i really want to talk about for weeks/months/years. it's annoying.

No. 1521733

>>1521422
Hey. When I get hyperfixation on something, that lasts years. I’m still obsessed with this one character. Downloaded every episode he appeared, saved over 50k pictures of him/featuring him, have one moving box worth of doujins and merchandise of him. Even build a shrine for all the stuff I collected. It literally makes my day if I see/find a new art of him. I think he first appeared in 2016 and it’s 2023 now, so I have been hyperfixated on him for 7 years and still going.

No. 1521744

>>1521422
I have an obsession for one of my favorite video games that comes every year, where I basically keep up on research of concept material, have the urge to mindlessly play the game (finishing it isn't the goal), and talk about it in general. Sometimes it'll last 2 months or as long as 9 months in the year. It's pretty much been like this for this one video game for over 15 years.
I'm still into other things, but not as severe. Like I recently had a burnout from a different video game series I induged in for like 8 months straight and then couldn't make any progress at all on the game for over 2 years, but I still tried to keep up on prototype material and data mine through as many games as I could during the burnout.
I don't believe I have autism, I do know I have ADHD, though. I really don't understand why they happen or what could be the root of it, maybe in my case it's because of neglect, but I'm glad I have something in me that gives me the feeling that I'll never be truly bored with nothing to do because I can just "keep up" on these favorite things I like.

No. 1521750

Any other nonnies here who's bodily response to sensory overload is to cry? I hate it so much. It's beyond embarrassing. I can generally know when I'm overloaded and it'll happen within 5 minutes of that but sometimes I'm not in a situation where I can quietly take a short leave to calm back down and my big grown ass has to cry in public. It was already bad enough as a child but at least then you're, well, a child. But now I'm nearing 30 it just makes me look incapable of being an adult.

No. 1521817

>>1521750
not too much personally but this reminds me of my autistic friend who cries very easily and HATES it, mostly because it makes people come over and try to hug her and comfort her which makes the overload soooo much worse (she actually hates hugging). she is late 30s btw and her age is definitely part of what makes it worse for her to deal with, so i sympathise with how shit it is to deal with.

at worst, my reaction is feeling physically sick and faint, and sometimes passing out. sometimes i cry if it's bad. but i do have a health condition that i blame it on and use it as my excuse to take breaks. but my general reaction is just stress and then fatigue later. i've gotten better at avoiding the overload as I get older but it also really depends on your personal situation, other mental health issues and relationships etc. too.

No. 1522167

>>1521750
For years I thought I just had a panic disorder so I noticed that crowded places, loud places etc would overwhelm me but I put it down to panic. I had a few times where shopping centres were too much and I needed to get outside. I'd be shakey and on the verge of tears and att I was dating a guy who thought I was faking panic attacks (he also had this weird belief that women cry on demand for attention) so that didn't help the situation. I cringe looking back on that time. Had a handful of similar incidents where I held back the tears.. kept it mostly together til he started publicly berating me for just needing a minute outside. Then the floodgates would open. I hated whatever was up with me. I hated him. I hated the frustration of this becoming a pattern where I wasn't allowed a moment of peace to just calm down and then head back in. I'd be managing it when he'd freak out. The last time it happened a concerned woman tried to check in and make sure I was safe with him because it looked dodgy. I'm shakey and trying to compose myself and take a few breaths, meanwhile hes pissed off and looks it like hes threatening me. That was a wake up call. I was close to 30, away from him when I finally went to an appt and really described the sensory side of things that always set it off. Later found out I've autism. I mostly disguise it as say a bathroom trip now. I don't go places with people who'll endlessly question me on why I need a moment or who'll escalate the situation into a whole scene. Back when I thought it was an anxiety issue I would always have people saying you have to 'face the thing that makes you uncomfortable' and that way it'll go away over time if you just keep at it. Whereas autism.. at least people know its not going to be overcome from forcing it like a form of exposure therapy. That switch in how I view it has been a relief. And tbh, no matter what the cause is.. needing a moment isn't the most shameful thing. Being visibly overwhelmed isn't. I built it up into this weakness or failure in my mind and that made it so much worse.

I haven't had a full on embarassing moment like that since. It took alot of pressure off and alot of the negative self-talk that was in my head over it stopped. I'm 5 years into a job where its stressful but I haven't had it pop up. The less that I dread it happening.. the less it plays out and actually happens.

No. 1522645

>>1520036
I do! Irl when I'm part of a big group of people I will often latch onto a joke that made everyone laugh assuming it is now an inside joke. Then I will repeat it even when the conversation has changed 5 different times. It can take me a while to realise that people stopped laughing the third time I repeated the joke.
Online I will latch onto a meme and will use it even after it's dead.

No. 1523365

File: 1678808308561.gif (759.66 KB, 250x183, ezgif-1-5c39ac942a.gif)

So i've never been diagnosed. The closest I ever came to doing that was when my mom took me to the pediatrician and asked about my hyperactivity and disruptive behavior in class. Of course the male doctor just dismisses it as a phase and that i'll grow out of it. To make a long story short now I strongly suspect I may be high functioning ASD or just ADHD or both, i have no idea. Either way, I always knew something was different or "off" about me.

I'm wondering for the nonnas that were diagnosed as adults, what made you suspect something was up? Should I be worried about being dismissed again?

Gif rel is me fighting with my weird side because i want to be normal

No. 1523366


No. 1523378

>>1519505
my issues w ADHD seem to wax and wane. they were always pretty bad growing up, but i could manage bc i was smart (and thus i was never medicated). after high school, i fell apart and couldn't handle college life because there was 0 structure. after a couple of years of floating through life, i suddenly lit a fire under my butt and became this really functional person who worked 50-60 hours a week, moved up very quickly at my new job, and somehow became known as a very reliable, stable person overall. unfortunately once covid hit i feel like i slowly entered a state of severe burnout, and after catching covid in 2022 & dealing with long covid symptoms, i'm barely hanging by a thread lol. i don't do much besides work & sleep, i have no hobbies, my sensory issues are the worst they've ever been….oops sorry for the novel lol it just makes me sad tbh

No. 1523429

>>1523378
Nona I deal with similar issues and I’m sorry you’re feeling burnt out.. I know what that feels like and it’s just like everything’s an exhausting chore.

For me, being in nature/outside just a little each day, as well as meditation (even really really short meditation) has helped to sort of reset my brain a bit. It doesn’t fix everything but it just sort of helps me to be aware of my needs more? Like when I’m hungry, when my back hurts, when I’m losing focus etc.

And please don’t forget to rest and give yourself a break when you need it.

No. 1523878

>>1521750
Yes, and to be honest I just own it, people won't stop their day or what they're doing usually and they move on quickly. Unless I'm actually sobbing or making noise, I've noticed that most people can't tell I'm actually crying anyway. Or maybe I'm just around shit people kek but I feel like most people don't care because that's just how they are. So I wouldn't worry about it too much nonny.

No. 1523961

>>1520786
So I made this post here >>1515489 and had to quit taking my meds for a few days because I ran out and couldn't get a refill. I must legit be retarded because now that I've been off my meds for a good couple days, I feel so much less anxious. I had no idea my Vyvanse was giving me this intense anxiety I've felt nearly every day for years. I constantly felt like something bad was going to happen. I knew I was bad at understanding myself but this really says a lot kek
>It's been two months but I'm having trouble focusing again
I worry this will happen to me too. I'm considering asking my doctor if I can switch to modafinil.

No. 1524033

ADHD anons who take stimulants, other than your ability to focus, did the stimulant affect you in any other way? Did you notice changes in your emotions?

No. 1524035

>>1524033
I take Adderall and the crash at the end of the day can leave me feeling hopeless over nothing in particular. I

No. 1524066

>>1523365
I think for most people diagnosed as adults, it was a result of them not coping from childhood and hoping they would "grow out of it" or some such. When you get to late 20s/30s and you're still unable to function properly, hold down a job, make friends or whatever else is expected, and most likely having regular breakdowns and anxiety etc. then it's worth getting referred from a doctor. If you're able to pay privately for a one off assessment ($$$) even better, cos then you can speak to someone who won't dismiss you. Even if they don't think you're ND they can give you some advice.
Also lol at that gif

No. 1524158

File: 1678886237682.jpg (9.46 KB, 275x178, 1640893472421.jpg)

>>1524066
ayrt This is exactly what I'm going through. I can't hold down a job that involves working in teams (I work so much better alone), can't do anything that's expected of me as an adult and keep friends and i have breakdowns regularly. The problem is I can't find a doctor in the area that is taking on new clients. Trying to keep it together.

No. 1524392

>>1524033
Adderall made me harder-hearted. I felt more efficient, aloof and disconnected. It still gave me anxiety and made it harder to sleep, though. It was a lifesaver when I needed a big hand to grab me and make me do stuff. After a while, it just became less effective and my scatterbrain came creeping back, just with added anxiety kek. Now that things are on a more even keel in my life (partly thanks to Adderall tbh), I prefer doing regular meditations as I get the focus that I need without physical side effects.

No. 1524460

>>1517106
these are all nice tips nonna, thank you for sharing

No. 1524606

I have some questions:
How is it like getting training on giving conversation? I need to get a councillor to help me with this because apparently i am bad to the point where it is detrimental, but i feel very awkward about it because this let me know i am not as good at masking as i thought and i thought i do a decent job with eye contact.
Is there anyone else with hyperactive symptoms of adhd who got told they were at risk of criminal behaviour and abusing drugs? I got told this, honestly, the only thing i abuse is food, but i am very straight edge and am paranoid about drugs and alcohol so it made me offended, ngl. I know tackling this issue is the only thing to stop my yo-yo dieting. I just want to know how it made people feel to be told this.
Lastly, how do people deal with their awful short term memory? I've known for years i have had this issue but a lot of people i saw just told me it was depression. i just want some recommendations, particularly in regards to studying. I feel like i do a decent job adapting to this issue practically in life by doing tasks slowly so i can remember i did them ect.

No. 1524611

>>1524033
I take ritalin and the moment it stops working i literally am knocked the fuck out. I can't complain about this because it helps me sleep.

>>1523378
>after high school, i fell apart and couldn't handle college life because there was 0 structure.

This happened to me also. Unfortunately my parents don't understand just how much of an impact adhd as on my life, likely due to language barrier and they will probably straight up refuse to accept it's a real thing and just some western bullshit. Congratulations on getting your life on track somewhat, you shouldn't feel sad. A lot of adhd people literally just succumb to drugs and depression when they don't get their shit together.

No. 1524639

Maybe this has been posted about before but does anyone else find themselves drawn to this site because of neurodivergents tendency toward 'justice sensitivity'? like, there is so much about this site that i don't like, but i could never leave permanently because I just can't stand it when I see someone being shitty. I know it's not good for my mental health because 99% of the time the cows are never going to get better, change, or apologize- or on the other hand lose their platform and/or go to jail. I get really happy when I think about Andrew Tate rotting in prison, though. I think we're all guilty in some way of being addicted to the feeling we get when someone finally gets what they deserve.

No. 1524641

it's crazy that I'm 24. I know that it isn't old but I still feel like a kid sometimes. I never had a romantic or sexual relationship, I haven't even been kissed. And I fail at every social interaction so that's never going to happen. And then there are other stuff I haven't done that people my age or younger than me are familiar with. Doing new things or doing things spontaneously is a foreign concept for me. not because I dislike change but my mind operates like a child where I feel like I need to get the approval from several people before I do anything, because in my mind doing exciting things just because "I feel like it" is not how the world operates.
>I have never traveled without my family
I don't even lack the funds and (I think) I'm high-functioning enough that I could do it. So idk why I have never done this. Solo travel looks fun
>I have never gotten a tattoo or pircerings
even though everyone I know got one between the ages 15-18.
>Never been to a festival or concert
even though everyone I know has been to at least one.
>Never gotten plastic surgery
Though to be fair I have no desire to get it but I see so many people online at my age who are so familiar with the different operations, while I think I'm too young to get anything done. I legit forget that I'm in my mid-20's.
>Never been clubbing
I have been to a club once but went home quickly. And the only reason I was there was because I was at a party hosted by my university and at the end of the party everyone moved over to the club and I tagged along.
>Never had a job
This one isn't exciting but it's such a common thing. The whole applying for job process has always been confusing for me and I was struggling so much in school that my parents deemed that a job wasn't necessary for me(luckily I live in a country where you are paid to for to school otherwise I would have been fucked)
These are only on top of my head but there are many more examples. Its just weird when I talk to people at the 18-24 age range and they all start talking about sex or concerts or sex with strangers or anything "wild" and I have nothing to add. I just thought I was a late bloomer when it came to stuff like this but when the rare occasions where opportunity arrived I didn't do it. Not because I didn't want to but because I legit forgot I was an adult and I could do it.
At first I thought it was because I have 0 friends but lots of these things you can do alone. Then I thought it might be my upbringing and slightly overbearing mother but my siblings did these things when they moved out. Then I thought it was my autism but I see so many autists younger than me going to concerts and getting tattoos and stuff.
I'm not even content with my life right now so it's not even because I like being at home all the time. I can't even devote myself to vidya, even though I like it but there is a voice in my head telling me that I'm bot allowed to play it so I come home for class and do nothing. I need to accept I will live a forever alone and unfulling life.
Sorry if this isn't the right thread. I'm not sure if this behaviour is autism related but I know other autistic people struggle with some of these things

No. 1524642

>>1524639
I feel the same way about shayna after recent events. I never cowtip or engage in the threads much but there's a thrill for me in the idea of her getting into huge trouble eventually.

No. 1524648

>>1521422
I don't really have any hobbies, but there's literally only like 5 topics that can get me to go on and on for ages, you literally can't get me to shut the fuck up even though i normally say absolutely nothing most of the time.

>>1524639
Tbh, not for me. I think the thing keeping me here is that it's the first place on the internet where i can literally be honest about myself without backlash. I do enjoy the cow boards very much though nonetheless.

>>1524641
I definitely used to have this mindset tbh. I used to be so depressed that i missed out on having a teenage experience and pretty much depleted my early 20s. Tbh, i am glad i isolated myself because i do not belong with normies in any capacity. I realised i was lying to myself about wanting these things because i wanted to be normal so fucking bad to the point of driving myself into depression. I also do think that it is important to not deprive yourself of life experiences of like travel. A lot of those experiences that are things that you think you should have. You don't have to do anything you are not comfortable and tbh i think you should reflect if you have any business being around such people. You don't need their approval, it's not worth anything.

No. 1524654

You guys have such an idealised vision of normies. Like yeah, they function better than you in certain select aspects… But otherwise they're just as clueless and childlike and lost as you.

No. 1524659

>>1524648
>i think you should reflect if you have any business being around such people. You don't need their approval, it's not worth anything.
no one is really trying to force me to do anything and no one has judged me for not having any life experience but it's hard when I try to talk to people and they all start to talk about any of these things

No. 1524667

>>1524158
what about online services?

No. 1524748

>>1524667
My state doesn't allow Medicaid recipients to use online therapy even if they're paying out of pocket. I was shocked as well, it's so cruel

No. 1524846

>>1524659
I have no idea what your problem is tbh, I think you should just be grateful your parents don't make you go to work and stop comparing yourself to normies. It's not healthy or good for your self-esteem. If you feel like you can't relate to them, you can just start daydreaming or something when they talk about boring shit, that's what i do lmao.

No. 1524849

>>1524641
Some of those things are pretty overrated anyway, like tattoos get so dull and blurry after only a couple years, and clubs are overrated and only seem interesting for people looking for a place to find random drunk sex easily. 24 is so young really too. I didn’t go to a big concert until I was almost 30. Anyway, I think you can rest assured that you don’t need common normie experiences on their timeline or at all to have a fun, satisfying life that even has thrills in it. If you think about it almost all of human existence has been people who haven’t done that list of things, it’s more or less modern contrivances. While I’ve enjoyed some of it, particularly as a fellow autist I’m glad to just enjoy life at my own pace and in my own way now.
Fear of the unknown and inability to take on new tasks (both from executive function issues and autistic demand avoidance) can be playing into your issue of coming home from class and feeling like you can’t do anything and that is definitely the thing you have to tackle. Try taking it in more palatable small steps, or thinking of activities that might feel more approachable and “allowed” (maybe something that feels healthy or productive and therefore good, or think of starting up a new hobby as a goal) that could still make you feel happy. Also look into autistic inertia, that may be relevant for you too.

No. 1524968

>>1524748
wtfff i've never heard of that before. utterly ridiculous. hope a spot opens up locally soon nona. hang in there!

No. 1524984

>>1524641
I'm in my 30s now and if I could make one thing clear to my younger self it's that growing up (whether it's becoming a teenager or adult) doesn't mean having to experience what everyone else around you is experiencing. And there is no checklist of things you have to do and achieve. It's personal. This was really hard for me too. Not that I ever wanted to go clubbing or get a tattoo, but just feeling like I was abnormal for not being interested in that stuff. And even if I was, I wouldn't know how to go about it.

I didn't have a relationship til my late twenties, and it's still weird to me that it even happened tbh kek. I liked the idea of travel in theory but in reality it's not been something I've ever felt motivated to do. I'm still very much a "childish" woman and my life is never going to be like my peers. I did try and force myself a lot when I was in my 20s, I would put myself through so much discomfort and panic to try and be like other people because I kept falling for the "you just need to put yourself out there" and "get out your comfort zone" meme. I was constantly burned out from the smallest amount. I never even did anything wild, but even the attempt made me freak out.

Then I discovered the concept of figuring out what I like and what I want to do instead of obsessing over what I should or should not be doing. It sounds like you need to do the same thing if you're feeling alienated, try and figure out what a fulfilling life really looks like to YOU, whilst removing all notions of what other people your age like to do from your mind. It can be very liberating.

>I see so many people online at my age who are so familiar with the different operations

Also this depresses me. Crazy how normalised surgery has become.

No. 1525165

>>1524642
yeah, it was really cathartic when momokun got called out and then creepshow (granted not the same year) and its hard not to just feel ecstatic when people get whats coming for them.

No. 1525207

>>1524641
I'm 25 and know exactly how you feel. It makes me depressed at times thinking about how childish and stunted I am compared to other people my age. I don't drive, have never had a s/o, no friends or social circle, spend all of my time outside of work at home, don't go out on holidays, etc.

The only thing I find that helps is just doing the things I want to do alone and remembering that I don't need permission to do things anymore. You could start with some smaller, easier things like going to a cafe/restaurant or out to a movie on your own. It helps me feel a bit more grown up as silly as it sounds and it gives me something to talk to normies about so I don't sound like a total hermit kek

No. 1525309

Does anyone else have the problem that you used to be very forgiving and kind of gullible but got burnt so many times that now you are very closed off and hostile to people you don't know? It's like I can't get the balance right of when to be open or not and come off rude often.

No. 1525619

i hate my brain i hate having to take medication that gives me minimal side effects but exacerbates my anxiety i hate seeming weird to most people if i don't mask myself because i talk in a fucking ouroboros that only other people with weird brains can follow I HATE THAT I CAN REMEMBER EVERYTHING FOR EVERYONE ELSE OR JUST ANYTHING NOT FUCKING USEFUL BUT MY STUPID FUCKING BRAIN WON'T CONNECT THE NEURONS TO THE ONES I NEED. until eight hours later and i wake up and realize where i left my pen

No. 1525684

Anynonnas here that were (or know another woman) misdiagnosed with social anxiety?

I visited one of those state funded mental health facilities and of course the male clinician is listening to me communicate calmly and effectively in a controlled environment and have the audacity to say i might just have social anxiety and not asd because i wasn't presenting stereotypical symptoms of someone with aspergers, while I fail to maintain much eye contact and describe in detail how dysfunctional i become in group settings and a team-based work environment BECAUSE SOCIALIZING IS EXHAUSTING AND CHALLENGING. Of course what can you expect from talking to someone that isn't trained for ASD.

I'm close to reaching a breaking point if I don't get assessed in the next year or so.

No. 1525690

>>1525684
uh why are you so convinced you have autism? if a trained clinician is diagnosing you, i wouldn't use a self diagnosis

No. 1525724

>>1525690
who said anything about self diagnosis?

No. 1526019

>>1525684
Idk anon, it could actually be just anxiety. In my experience of having a more social form of autism, it's actually not that easy to have self-awareness as to how exactly your autism symptoms manifest. I think the truly key thing to think about is why exactly do you feel stressed out about being in a group? What you posted was quite vague and literally any introverted normie can feel that way about being in groups or talking to people.

No. 1526028

>>1525309
I used to be desperate to have friends when i was younger and regrettably behaved in a cringey way i.e copying behavior of people around me who i saw as socially successful but going too far with it. People would get me to embarrass myself or would ask really rude questions to me and i was too scared to fight back because i was so desperate to be liked. One day, i just have up when some girl told me i was incredibly boring and when somebody i was forced by teachers to be friends with got into a huge altercation with another girl and i was too afraid to be associated with her because i fear conflict and being hated. I just kept myself in social isolation from there on well into my 20s which is now. I learned that i really don't need friends which sounds like a cope, but my behaviour was just me being desperate to be a regular normie and that's not what the universe wants for me. When i am by myself, i can actually relax, do what i want and breathe. I finally feel somewhat free. I also actually feel like my need for socialisation is completely met by lolcow and reading discord so i don't actually feel lonely.

No. 1526055

>>1525684
why not both, a large percent of autistic people have anxiety too. if you don't think a separate diagnosis is helpful or correct then say why.

No. 1526161

Nonnas.
I am going to therapy for the first time soon. I have always known that something is wrong with me. I don't know if it is ASD or ADHD.
Here are some of my supposed symptoms for either:
>always sperging about my special interests with my family and friends.
>choosing to seat on the same seat of the bus when I take it.
>forgetting important things
>drop my pasta when I interact with another humans
>sometimes late
>can't concentrate for shit
Nonnies, is it over?

No. 1527077

>>1526161
Nah, you sound normal.

No. 1527692

>>1526161
it depends how detrimental to your life these things are.

No. 1527818

I’m drunk I’m usually better at lurking but I need to say that this thread pic is so relatable maybe it’s a little extreme with how horrific the unmasked expression is but I get that it’s supposed to signify the intensity felt after being a seemingly functioning human all day

No. 1528199

>be child me, perfectly happy playing alone
>ANON JUST GO ASK TO PLAY WITH THEM, JUST BE YOURSELF, JUST GO SAY HI, DON'T EVER LET YOUR DIAGNOSIS HOLD YOU BACK!!!
>go say hi and be myself, get brutally rejected and bullied
>die inside
>go back to playing alone
>ANON JUST GO ASK TO PLAY WITH THEM, JUST BE YOURSELF, JUST GO SAY HI, DON'T EVER LET YOUR DIAGNOSIS HOLD YOU BACK!!!

Did anyone else get stuck in this loop with teachers as a child? I guess it's a type of toxic positivity, pressuring socially awkward people to just "put themselves out there" even though everyone knows it's not going to work. I have so many awful memories of being cringe and socially retarded and it was all preventable, I don't understand why I wasn't allowed to just read a book quietly by myself. Fuck being forced to publicly humiliate myself over and over and over again because some TA or recess supervisor thought she was gonna cure my autism with a pep talk.

No. 1528252

File: 1679252286037.png (35.4 KB, 452x686, unworthy.png)

>>1528199
100% nona. I know picrel isn't specifically autism-related - and that being a loner or having low-self esteem isn't synonymous - but this excerpt from Unworthy hit the nail on the head for me.
There is a superficial and sometimes naive understanding of how different people function in the world. First, there is this magical idea that everyone can and will accept you for who you are. Second, even though they say you should "be yourself" and deserve love etc etc. they are still trying to correct your personality (eg, shyness or introversion is always something we are told to overcome).

No. 1529116

>>1524984
NAYRT but this was wholesome and I needed to hear it. Cheers nonnaroni ♥

No. 1529330

I took all these notes for work, and showed my designs to my boss today and he was like "your designs all missed the big crucial thing" and I was like "Whaaa!??!?" Then I looked at my notes and saw that I did indeed write down "ALL DESIGNS NEED TO HAVE THIS THING IN EM". Fuck me for not reading my notes during my work. I even copy-pasted the crucial bits into Photoshop so I could look at them AS I WORKED. Ughghgghgh.

No. 1529966

>>1528199
You literally described my childhood. But tbh, the most truamatic bullying happened when i was an adult and everyone kept telling me that adults are so amazing and forgiving. I am speaking purely for myself, but i feel like i wasn't born with the capacity to understand the concept loneliness. What i thought was loneliness was only the shame of looking like a loner because i was taught that i needed to be sad about being alone. I also find that i only seek out "friends" because i want somebody to sperg about my interests with, i don't actually care about an emotional connection, because i just don't really have the capacity to do that nor do i care to learn. I feel like not many autistic admit to being this way because it reinforces negative sterotypes or what not, but i could literally be alone for the rest of my life and not really give a shit.

No. 1529982

How do ya'll handle sensory overload if you're sensory sensitive?
Diagnosed ADHD and as I've gotten older, it's noticeably uncomfy. Sometimes I cannot be touched/hugged at all or my brain gets fuzzy from sound overload. I recalled stumbling upon an etsy that had "gem stone disguised chew-sticks" for adults and backed out of getting it from inner embarrassment.

No. 1530133

>>1529982
I've always disliked plastic yet all sperg toys are made of it. Guess texture issues aren't such a common thing.

No. 1530136

>>1529966
>the most truamatic bullying happened when i was an adult and everyone kept telling me that adults are so amazing and forgiving
I feel like adults are more likely to make snide comments and then act like you are over reacting when you say something about it or get all upset when say something back. Just why.

>What i thought was loneliness was only the shame of looking like a loner because i was taught that i needed to be sad about being alone

Same. As soon as I got used to doing more things alone and no longer had an "audience" for most of my day, I stopped being lonely. I do like having a partner though as I'm quite huggy for an autist but I don't care about friends as find them exhausting and I never get the same amount of energy out as I put in.

No. 1530297

>>1529330
this is me at work too. i try so hard to be good at my job, and the actual work (skill) i am good at but sometimes i just miss really obvious things that everyone else somehow managed to take on board. i'm so focused on the small details that i make things more complicated and end up missing the big stuff in front of me. really fucks with my self esteem at work.

No. 1530299

>>1529982
time alone, going somewhere quiet (or noise-cancelling headphones / white noise), wearing something soft and heavy like a big coat with the hood up, immersing myself in a book or podcast, playing a game on your phone or a puzzle book, chew gum or drink some tea.

No. 1530301

>>1530297
samefagging to add that whenever i bring up this issue, people say "make a list and stick to it" but i already do that and still miss basic things somehow. it's embarrassing. what else could i try to make sure i'm seeing the big picture? this is actually one of the things that makes me want to try medication because it feels like it's something beyond "working smarter".

No. 1531595

>>1530136
>I feel like adults are more likely to make snide comments and then act like you are over reacting

There’s nothing like getting lightly bullied by whole ass adults as an awkward little child. I was chastised for being too slow or acting like a “bimbo” just by adults. Just why

No. 1531611

I want to know why health professions tell me I seem too put together to be autistic even though it took years of social cluelessness and copying other girls to get to this “level” and yet someone says they’re the opposite gender and these professionals are like ok yeah that makes sense. It just feels like misogyny. So basically if I’ve always been into collecting objects, been socially awkward especially with girls, stimmed, had a great talent for detail in certain areas, been very literal and straightforward, easily recognized autism in other people, struggled with fabrics as a child, been a loner, been told I’m like an alien or a robot or a guy, and that DOESN’T mean anything. But if I say all these things give me a male gender identity then that makes sense? What a fucking joke.

No. 1531665

>>1531611
You sound more autistic than i am and I managed to be diagnosed with little incident once i actually came into contact with professionals who actually understood autism. On top of that, i don't even have sensory issues or stim, or at least i am not aware that i do and i did not come to them for an autism diagnosis in the first place after dismissing the possibility due to being put off by unqualified general practitioners and cbt therapists who only work with neurotypical people. I feel like the issue is not just being a woman, but it's being adult. So many resources online as heavily geared towards children and i think that there are still people who cannot fathom the notion that somebody who has autism would go undiagnosed because they already have a stereotype in their mind as to what it is and of course a woman who they see as socially acceptable doesn't fit the idea in their mind. Idk if i am miss reading what you said, but are they trying to imply you are trans or something? That's very outlandish and gross.

No. 1531682

>>1531665
Thank you nonna. I appreciate hearing that I sound autistic kek. I feel like it’s hard to feel seen most of the time.

I guess the state of the mental health field in the US just makes me feel totally disillusioned and constantly… confused. I’m dumb so I tell my therapist I think the idea of being trans is illogical and misogynistic, and she sort of treats me like a lost soul who will hopefully come to the light someday (she doesn’t engage with the subject directly but that’s what I assume she’s thinking). At the same time, even though she admits she knows little about autism, she gently tries to steer me away from the idea that I have it. I’ve read multiple books on female autism. I have lived my life as me. I think I have a better idea of whether it fits. And she’s otherwise very nice. She’s not even the only professional who has just dismissed me outright. I have brought it up with three other professionals and they all dismissed it right away.

I have anxiety, they can see that— but why? Could it be that I’m terrified of saying the wrong thing in a social setting from past experiences where I was punished for my awkwardness? I wish professionals would take a deeper look into the root causes of these so-called disorders.

Unfortunately/fortunately, I recognized the importance of appearance for women while I was growing up, so I treated clothes and makeup like a special interest. I engineered my look. And I guess I look normal, attractive even. I wanted protection from my awkwardness and in some ways the “mask” did the trick. But now I guess it’s too convincing. Never mind the level of disassociation and discomfort the mask required over the years. I assume that I’d need to do stereotypically autistic things in front of them for a professional to take me seriously, and at this point I have lost too much respect for them to jump through their hoops. Sorry for the rant.

No. 1531686

>>1531682
I think it's time to ditch your therapist and just skip right to talking to a psychologist who can steer you in the right direction or at least a councillor who has indicated they have experience with autistic people. It's abhorrent how many people in the mental health sector just don't understand autistic people in any capacity, they don't deserve to have their careers imo. I know you speak of the US, but it's the same issue in the UK too. All this talk about mental health this, mental health that, they really only mean it for neurotypical people who have light depression, everyone else can get fucked. I am kind of the opposite to you, i unfortunately gave up on my personal appearance because I am not very attractive and it was giving me depression, so i probably fit the physical description of what people think a female autistic woman should look like. A little off topic, but it reminds me of that one tiktok where that pretty girl who allegedly had autism made an uwu cringey tiktok about her sensory problems and she got heat for wearing makeup and that being the reason why she couldn't possibly have autism. Idk why people think autistic women can't be groomed or be attractive, i bet if a good looking man had autism nobody would say shit.

No. 1531694

>>1531686
I am glad you did get a diagnosis and you were believed. It’s just so frustrating how simple-minded people (even mental health professionals!) are about appearance, like it directly translates to who we are inside. It’s like the trans thing, it feels like normies are like “if you can trick my eyes, you are whatever you say you are!” How are people this shallow? That’s like the reasoning of a literal baby.

It does feel like autism is a very niche topic for some reason, even though it seems like it should be so fundamental, as the neurodivergence is the base reason for so many things in life. Of course there’s no medication for it, although there is for anxiety. So just to tinfoil a bit, why would an official medical body support or promote it over a downstream disorder that can be medicated? There’s no money to make from it.

Kek you’re right, I think good-looking and high-functioning guys totally fly under the radar. Seems like more of them feel totally unashamed and comfortable in their awkwardness and I feel so envious of that sometimes.

No. 1531696

>>1531682
Anon i just want to say i really understand your post. All my life i never correctly fit with people. Even the weeb/fandom girls who slowly became ftm weirdos. At most i could get along with males who had asperger's into video games. Even though i just wanted to be socially well enough to have a group of girl friends. It got to the point where skincare, hair care, make up were an interest to make me fit in. Started wearing the most generic shirt with jeans and backpack to college. Stopped playing music i actually liked at work. I just wanted to be normal. I could physically pass but after some talking people would say im quirky or odd. Conversation is just never natural so im always leaning back on previous normal talking scripts. I see people socialize easy but for some reason i just cant. The mask is only good enough looks wise. Found out last year im considered attractive but I'm not even into men. All this song and dance while i still really struggle at studying. I cant even decide if i want a diagnosis because i worry how that would affect my life. It would help my life by allowing longer time to study and maybe reach my profession but it worries me for jobs. At this point i still wear make up for work to be normal, put together, but im letting it slip again because i do miss being me. I just wish me got along better with people naturally.

No. 1531702

>>1531694
Find a professional that has experience with late diagnosed women. If you contact some charities they might be able to recommend someone.

Also, I know people in this thread hate self diagnosis but if you truly think you have it and don't need a formal diagnosis then that is enough.

No. 1531721

>>1531702
I agree tbh, if you can live your life normally as it is, imo i don't think seeing a professional is always compulsory. But sometimes it's nice to have your curiosity quenched.

No. 1531730

>>1531696
It’s not easy and I’m sorry you’re dealing with it, too. That does seem to be a common thread, getting along easily with Asperger’s guys. Guys are easier for me too but I prefer female friendships, especially now that I realize how unlikely it is that guys actually can be friends. Other aspie/non-neurotypical women are the absolute best. I still wear makeup, too. I really don’t feel comfortable without it and I probably don’t feel good enough just as I am. But I love how other women look naturally and I think there are plenty of people who won’t judge you if you want to go without it.

>>1531702
>>1531721
Thank you, nonnies. I’ve thought about getting diagnosed before, but after searching around for local resources I sort of lost steam, and now I just feel sort of disillusioned with the whole thing. Part of me still yearns for validation, and I’m sure I’d love to get it from a mental health professional. But idk, I was misdiagnosed with other things until I figured out I have ADHD and then gently lead my psychiatrist to that conclusion myself, and it just seems like they look at a checklist that you can look at yourself, and don’t apply any extra critical thought. So why bother. I’m sorry if I sound bitter. I’m just disappointed by my past experiences.

No. 1531731

File: 1679624228927.jpg (12.59 KB, 275x275, aba0516d7646f6a28a8777684dee8e…)

it's 3am, I need to be up at 6am, I have a shitton of work and preparation I need to do for class and I haven't done any of it. My meds aren't fucking working. I'm fucking tired I can't live like this anymore

No. 1531754

>>1531731
Nonnie at the risk of sounding like a mom try to lay down at least so your body can rest even if you can’t sleep. I have a friend with serious insomnia it sucks.

No. 1531755

i don't know if i am autistic or not. growing up, my teachers would tell my parents that they thought i was because i avoided eye contact, had difficulty relating to other girls my age, liked typical autist stuff like egypt and ghosts (and later mlp and creepypasta) was generally a chubby, lazy, stubborn and weird kid. i got better at learning social cues and appearing 'normal' during puberty. i got assessed for it when i was 16 and the lady concluded I wasn't autistic. she said i had made an effort to be polite and followed social cues, and i felt like all the tests were weird and juvenile since they were clearly designed for younger kids. i've since been diagnosed with adhd which i don't really identify with as much as i do with autism. my pediatrician was a pill pusher who knew something was up with me but barely examined it. i still think i'm autistic, but i don't want to pretend like i have it when a professional has concluded i am not.

No. 1531756

>>1531755
So, while I think it's important to respect professionals opinions, professionals can also make the wrong decisions from time to time, too. Women without autism mask more, so it's really common for autistic women to act polite. I don't think it would be wrong of you to go to even a different psychologist and look for another opinion if you feel like your diagnosis doesn't fit, or treatment for ADHD isn't working for you. I've had some doctors tell me things that I just didn't feel fit me. IT's okay to want to hear someone else's opinion.

No. 1531766

>>1531755
If you're diagnosed with one ND thing then it's much more acceptable to self diagnose for others. You can get a lot of the same allowances for school and work too as it's known that there is crossover. Just be honest and say diagnosed ADHD, suspected autism if it's anything official.

No. 1531796

Is it worth anything to get diagnosed? I think I may have adhd, and though i really doubt it, maybe a bit autistic, but is there anything good out of a diagnosis? Like, what good do you get from it?

No. 1531801

>>1531755
It can of course be hard to say without a lot more details about what you’re really like and what your internal experience of living life is like, but if advice for adult autistics to help manage life helps you, then it helps you. It’s worth pursuing just reading everything you can about autism traits and difficulties and appropriate management techniques and realistic limits and boundaries about those things and seeing if it helps you. Part of how I realized I was previously misdiagnosed with a ton of other irrelevant stuff was that after I realized autism sounded like me, I realized I’d been doing most of the coping strategies my whole life, and that the ones I hadn’t heard of actually did wonders for me. Like it turns out I can stand long days surrounded by chaos if I wear earplugs as soon as I start getting overwhelmed or upset by it.
>>1531796
If you’re already done with school, then often times no if you have low support needs and wouldn’t be looking into workers rights or disability payments. There are downsides to having an official diagnosis like that it can result in work discrimination. It also costs an insane amount for the full proper tests. Simply getting a more informal initial assessment from an autism specialist and/or seeing a therapist who works with autistic people often and seeing how you feel from there is my personal usual recommendation for low support needs adults.

No. 1532306

File: 1679704274113.jpg (13.26 KB, 275x275, g-4.jpg)

I'm so frustrated I hate those online second-hand shops/marketplaces where you have to message the seller and talk to them because I suck at communication and articulating myself because I'm a sperg. I feel so awkward just telling them my address(for shipping purpose) right away and will wait until they directly ask for it. I just find the whole process painful and I can't begin to describe how much I hate talking to strangers while having to appear polite and not like a sperg.
I want to get an out-of-print translation of a book but this guy who was selling it stopped replying to my messages and now I'm scared if I appeared like a shady scammer or something. I don't even now if I should bother messaging him back. He also replied in short responses which made it harder for me to know what to say to him so he probably thought I was a weirdo and stopped replying. I hate this I just wanted to get this book without going on a scavenger hunt trough several used bookstores across the nation

No. 1532313

>>1529982
I don't goddamn know. I have a problem where if there's music with lyrics playing I can't properly hold a conversation. It's made me sperg out so many times at the cash register, I fucking hate coffee shops that insist on blasting an indie rock spotify playlist, I just want to relax. I visited Japan for a while and one of the major things I noticed is that the shops play soft jazz or mood music, rarely anything with lyrics. It was such a breath of fresh air. When I'm going out in public usually I have ear plugs in, but I have to take them out at the cash register which doesn't solve the conversation problem.

No. 1532339

>>1532306
>scared if I appeared like a shady scammer or something
I hate anything like this too nonnie and get the same anxious thoughts. I swear I come across so bad all the time because I just don't know what to say and get the timings wrong. usually I just give up and ghost people because the whole thing is too stressful.
>replied in short responses which made it harder for me to know what to say
having this problem right now with my boss. she gives such short and vague instructions that i don't understand and i literally don't even know how to ask her to elaborate. i spend hours trying to craft replies and it's painful.
communication problems suck so much.

No. 1532390

>>1532306
Just send him a message saying "is this still available?". You might find transactions like this easier if you make a script to follow in the future, e.g. "Is this still available? … Does it have X? … Can I pay by X? … Paid, my address is X". Don't think too much about the responses, they might just be busy or get a lot of annoying messages.

I've stopped worry about seeming like a sperg these days because, well, I am one. Oh no, people are going to see what I really am and it's not even some terrible thing? I've got better things to do than worry about that. Plus it's not like I'm even going to see them again ever.

No. 1532646

>>1532306
Sellers get tired of answering too many questions because it generally means the person is not serious, otherwise they would have bought it already, especially if the item is not cost prohibitive. People who ask to many questions or seem invasive ALWAYS find "problems" with an item, demand a refund without returning or return the item damaged, etc. He probably doesn't want to deal with it.

>t. seller

No. 1532647

>>1532306
Sellers get tired of answering too many questions because it generally means the person is not serious, otherwise they would have bought it already, especially if the item is not cost prohibitive. People who ask to many questions or seem invasive ALWAYS find "problems" with an item, demand a refund without returning or return the item damaged, etc. He probably doesn't want to deal with it.

>t. seller

No. 1532651

>>1532306
Sellers get tired of answering too many questions because it generally means the person is not serious, otherwise they would have bought it already, especially if the item is not cost prohibitive. People who ask to many questions or seem invasive ALWAYS find "problems" with an item, demand a refund without returning or return the item damaged, etc. He probably doesn't want to deal with it.

>t. seller

No. 1532652

>>1532306
Sellers get tired of answering too many questions because it generally means the person is not serious, otherwise they would have bought it already, especially if the item is not cost prohibitive. People who ask to many questions or seem invasive ALWAYS find "problems" with an item, demand a refund without returning or return the item damaged, etc. He probably doesn't want to deal with it.

>t. seller

No. 1532656

>>1532306
100% he forgot about it or he thinks you're not serious about buying it. i used to be super scared about this stuff too but at some point you realise that this isn't something you have to or can be 'good' at. i dont think most sellers care about how someone comes across, just if they want the item and have the money. id say just start off with 'hey, im really interested in this object! i'd like to buy it, what are the next steps?' or something

No. 1532661

vent because i think i have adhd or some condition that renders me incapable of any sort of planning or following through with plans.

i know this girl with adhd and i'm so jealous of her because she does a million things at once and i don't know how she does it at all. i know a few people like this and it makes me wish i had the adhd they had even though i know thats the stupidest thing to ever wish for. i've spent my last five birthdays cramming for tests and pulling allnighters. ive got no structure in my life.

i feel like im on standby mode all the time. if someone forces me to work on something, then i can do it really well without losing focus, but on my own im utterly incapable. it's really bad for my self esteem too because i dont trust myself to do anything. i've missed out on so many opportunities cause i see the deadline coming up and whizzing by. i'm scared my whole life ill be stagnant and never climb out of this hole ive dug for myself.

i dont want to get help because i dont know if im adhd or not and even if i were i dont have the ability to argue for something for longer than a an hour and its like ive called my doctor twice this past year saying i need help and then i keep missing the appointment lol I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO !! ! i want to reach my full potential but im standing in the damn way :(

No. 1532719

File: 1679767133058.jpg (94.94 KB, 942x942, 337799999_1267781453812182_185…)

retard parents didn't take the clearly autistic kid to the doctors (me) now i'm an adult without a diagnosis of something I always had, people just think I'm weird and fucked up bc of my hyperfixations

No. 1532738

>>1532719
You can think of the positive side that is at least you are not officially registered as retarded t. someone who wasted ten years in useless therapy between ages 8-18 and is still seen as a freak and also gets asked irrelevant questions about autism whenever going to the doctor to treat a physical illness. (I'm not trying to be rude, I can see how it can suck either way.)

No. 1532906

anyone taking modafinil for adhd? Im skeptical of meds but recently talked with a psychiatrist and brought the possibility of a diagnosis because I have executive dysfunction and low doses of modafinil as treatment

No. 1533328

>>1532906
i got some from this online shady place because i had really bad executive dysfunction too (no diagnosed ADHD) but as far as i can remember it didn't really help? i think it just made me so chatty, like id have a million things to say to someone in a conversation when i normally have nothing to say. as for getting stuff done, i cant remember, i dont think it really helped.

No. 1533474

File: 1679857611310.jpg (10.83 KB, 312x296, tsj8l8ahuw431-3345458751.jpg)

>>1532390
>>1532647
>>1532656
thanks for the replies! would it be inappropriate if I contacted him again and asking him if he was still interested, or is weird since it's been some days nows ince we first wrote?

No. 1533479

>>1533474
go for it! its not inappropriate at all, if you want inappropriate, i used to message a guy about a desk like once every week until he figured no one else wanted to buy it and gave it to me 100 pounds cheaper lol

No. 1533521

Does any body else deal with alexithymia? I remember seeing therapists who really only cater to neurotypical people and i would struggle so hard trying to organise my feelings and often would just allow therapists to make up my emotions for me because i was so confused as to what they wanted from me. Ngl, i did get a little agitated when they would try to coax information out of me and i always felt completely unsure what they wanted from me. Tbh, most of the time when i talk to people, i always feel like they expect a certain response, every conversation always feels like a quiz and i am constantly policing myself making sure i try my hardest to provide the correct answer. I feel like almost autistic woman talks about feeling every emotion intensely, but for me, my emotions are just confused and jumbled or often times they feel non-existent.

No. 1533676

>>1533521
I'm the same noni, but I also do feel very strong emotions at times, like I can't seem to stop crying when I really get going and am upset. For me at least, it's just getting moved to that point of emotion that's difficult. I understand you though. Every interaction feels like a performance. Any time I tried to describe this, people would get freaked out and call me some kind of unfeeling psychopath/sociopath, kek.

No. 1533701

>>1533676
Tbh i straight up have written on my diagnosis report that i have low empathy and that's something about myself i always knew was true but i thought that having a decent sense of morality negated this but apparently not.

No. 1533990

>>1533521
Pretty sure I do. I recognize anger, happiness and excitement in myself but sometimes all I feel is that I just need to cry and cannot pinpoint what I feel exactly

No. 1535035

File: 1680020643339.jpg (11.26 KB, 261x275, 1671624684966.jpg)

This is more of a vent but I need to get this of my chest. I'm the anon at >>1532306 and >>1533474 and I genuinely think this guy blocked me or something because our previous chat doesn't show up and when I tried to send him a new message it didn't show up either, but he hasn't taken the sales page down because I can still see it. I'm so mad. This translation is rare and I felt so lucky that I just stumbled upon it so fast and then I screw it up with my poor communication skills. Honestly, I don't even think I was being pushy but it's always hard to judge yourself so what do I know. It's just that I asked stupid and obvious questions like "is this form for payment okay"(even though it is the only form for payment people use on this site), "can you ship it"(even though it says so in his profile), "when do you want me to send the money?"(of course he wanted it ASAP so idk why I was stalling). I'm just frustrated by the whole ordeal. I really wanted this book and then I fuck up. I also feel a little hurt that I was blocked but that's silly since I don't even know the guy and he is allowed to block whoever he wants.
at least I found out that the library has the exact same translation so I get to read it, so that's good news! but if I want to own it then I need to start looking for it on different sites and stores

No. 1535039

>>1535035
Nonna I've experienced this in several hobbies: sometimes scrotes don't want to sell their precious hobby thing to a woman.

No. 1535151

File: 1680031543846.png (80.44 KB, 750x737, Feelings Wheel WIP.png)

>>1533521
yep, a therapist told me about it a few years ago (implying she thought I have it) after numerous agonising sessions where I couldn't put any feelings into words. i would just talk about the logistics of things without any feeling behind it. i sort of wanted therapy to be me presenting a problem and the therapist to give me a solution but turns out that's not how it works at all… basically I only know i'm stressed if i'm literally having a panic attack or get diarrhoea or something (sorry) and don't know i'm sad unless i'm in tears (which is rare and always unexpected). she gave me a 'feelings wheel' to help me put feelings into words which was kind of cringe. i'm 30 years old. but in fairness it was quite useful, it basically gives you options based on intensity, so if you know you feel vaguely "bad" or "off" it will help you narrow down. over time i have gotten better, mostly through verbalising (even if it's just too myself) when i know how i'm feeling. turns out i'm pissed off a lot more than i realised kek. but generally speaking most of my feelings are nebulous and uncertain to me.

No. 1535734

>>1535151
>i sort of wanted therapy to be me presenting a problem and the therapist to give me a solution
Same for me. This seems to be a common autist thing and why therapy is known to not work well on autists. I expected to get advice, tools/techniques to "help myself", help to understand why I am the way I am or do the things I do. Turns out they expected me to come in knowing exactly what my problem(s) are, how to fix it and for me to tell the therapist exactly what they can do to help me fix it. That's basically the opposite of what I expected. I had no idea what my issues were, couldn't even understand my own feelings and was completely lost so time and time again a dozen therapists just told me they didn't know how to help me because I couldn't tell them exactly what I needed.

No. 1535739

>>1535035
make a new account and try again nonna. or use someone else's

No. 1535741

>>1533701
I think I had very little empathy up to about mid twenties but now I seem to have more than most people and kind of hate this planet for how much everyone just doesn't care. Saying that, I do still find myself sometimes rolling my eyes at people going through something difficult that I had to face alone (also have abusive parents) even though I know needing help shouldn't be a bad thing. I guess that's more a form of jealousy though than not recognizing their feelings.

No. 1535744

>>1535151
I had a physical problem and got told it was a mental one by a dismissive doctor who didn't even examine me. The therapists I saw were all awful, expecting me to talk at length when I just briefly explained the situation and then expected a step by step guide how to solve it (therapy isn't a common thing where I'm from). The last one kept pushing for me to tell them how I felt about things and I would say "I guess I felt …?" or get annoyed at me because I didn't care much about life milestones. Stopped going as all of it made me feel worse like I was a failure at therapy. This was before I was diagnosed.

No. 1535792

>>1535744
ayrt this has been the bane of my life, really. i have a lot of chronic pain and illnesses, many of which don't have straight forward explanations and was given diagnoses like fibromyalgia, even though I have confirmed EDS, to dismiss it away or imply it was emotional pain manifesting. it's so frustrating. the thing is, i tried so hard in my 20s. i accepted that i was perhaps "emotionally repressed" and needed to get in touch with my feelings, and that's what led me to therapy but i also tried meditation and breathing exercises, journaling and all that shit that is meant to make you more emotionally aware. i found it all very damaging, truthfully. it just brought attention to how unnatural it is to me - to the point where i actually disassociated for a while and felt like an alien. i feel physically worse than ever after trying to be something i'm not. there is so much pressure to be expressive and open in this current climate and I don't think it's always a positive or useful thing. especially if you're being told that your physical pain is reliant on you addressing your emotions. did your health issue get resolved in the end by the way?

i just focus on learning how to communicate roughly what i might feel about things now by taking cues from my physical state, instead of expecting to feel a deep connection to my emotions at all times. but it was always more of a problem for others than it was for me.

No. 1535836

>>1535792
I would say it’s mostly solved now. A doctor years later confirmed it the area was sort of shaped strangely which causes issues but I also think I have a lot of physical tension from growing up with abusive parents (I wasn’t aware they were abusive when I did therapy as that was “normal” for me). Maybe therapy could have actually helped if the therapist was better and not so determined to make me feel like my way of thinking was wrong. Anyway, I’ve focused on the physical issues mostly and it worked.

Agree about meditation. Seems to do great things for some people. I tried a few times alone and in a group and even went to a special session in a temple in Asia. But it doesn’t work for me. I have ADHD and having quiet in my head is mentally painful for me. Why is always being curious and wanting to learn new things a bad thing anyway. I’m happier just accepting how I am.

No. 1535872

File: 1680104462328.gif (355.87 KB, 258x524, yep.gif)

Is there anyone else here who was physically/emotionally abused for their symptoms growing up, wasn't diagnosed until adulthood, and has become completely estranged from their family? I am in my 30's and have absolutely no support system, I can't hold a job, and I am so intolerably lonely. I don't know why I exist, no one wants me around and I contribute nothing to society, my brain will never shut the fuck up and I'm too chickenshit to kill myself.

No. 1535890

>>1535872
I’m exactly like this. I’ve applied for 40 something jobs in the last month and got nothing. I would have applied for more but I know I can’t do in person work (tried many times before my diagnosis) so applied for everything else I’m remotely qualified for (abusive parents meant I have awful qualifications which doesn’t help). I’ve very lucky that I have a partner I live off of but we’ve been in a long distance relationship for most of it so I’m physically alone basically all the time.

>I contribute nothing to society

Please stop having a capitalist mindset. You are allowed to just exist. I bet that almost most people contribute hardly anything beyond the bare minimum required (e.g. taxes) and what it takes to maintain relationships for their own advantage. Forget about the big picture and just focus on you and your needs. It’s what everyone else does. Autists are a lot less selfish but unfortunately we live in a very selfish society so we need to adapt to survive.

No. 1535891

>>1535872
I’m exactly like this. I’ve applied for 40 something jobs in the last month and got nothing. I would have applied for more but I know I can’t do in person work (tried many times before my diagnosis) so applied for everything else I’m remotely qualified for (abusive parents meant I have awful qualifications which doesn’t help). I’ve very lucky that I have a partner I live off of but we’ve been in a long distance relationship for most of it so I’m physically alone basically all the time.

>I contribute nothing to society

Please stop having a capitalist mindset. You are allowed to just exist. I bet that almost most people contribute hardly anything beyond the bare minimum required (e.g. taxes) and what it takes to maintain relationships for their own advantage. Forget about the big picture and just focus on you and your needs. It’s what everyone else does. Autists are a lot less selfish but unfortunately we live in a very selfish society so we need to adapt to survive.

No. 1535915

>>1535836
>happier just accepting how i am
me too. glad you came to the same conclusion too despite the horrible stuff you went through.
>having quiet in my head is mentally painful
I actually love quiet and just sitting doing nothing, blankly staring. it's basically daydreaming, which relaxes me. but meditation is so different because it's not allowing the mind to wander naturally - it's focusing on one thing (eg, breathing) and disconnecting you from yourself or "ego". if you're already a daydreamy person who has trouble connecting to their inner feelings or lacking identity, then this can be dangerous imo, not to sound too overdramatic. i've heard about people going into psychosis just practising for a short amount of time. doing things that ground you is a much better way to relax from my experience, like walks in nature or something.

No. 1536307

>>1531696
adding to this train to say I’m the same. I really wanted female friends so I studied fashion and makeup and pop music really hard. But it turned out most normie women don’t think about it that much, they just enjoy it, so I still ended up isolated. At least I had a topic to make small talk with if I held myself back from sperging. These threads really are making me realize I was in deep denial about my autism. I met a group of semi autistic men and I realized I was way more autistic than I realized, that I stim all the time and make weird facial expressions and people just don’t tell me. It kind of sucks because I thought I had made progress and it turns out people were just humoring me. Better than being bullied for it anyway.

No. 1536331

>>1535872
I an not estranged from my family yet, but i do plan on ditching them after i get a decent job. But yes, my mother in particular would yell at me for acting autistic constantly and has pushed me into having mental breakdowns by constantly making me go to huge family events where my social capacities were pushed beyond my limits. When i would vent to her about how nobody wanted to be my friend in school one time she got angry and blew up at me saying that it's my fault that nobody likes me and that i am just a terrible person. Before hand, she would beg me to make friends at school and said she would give money if I make friends and introduce them to her. The kicker is that they know what autism is but completely refused to do anything about it and threw me into school whilst i was non-verbal and got angry about how much time i wasted having to sit with me for speech therapy, which is the only treatment for autism i ever got. I had been asked if i was autistic constantly as a child. I am sure i never got diagnosed because my parents were too lazy and selfish to sit through the 2-3 hour assessment and would rather waste their time watching tv. They have constantly let me down with their own selfishness and disinterest in my well being.

I also wanted to say to you anon is that don't worry about not contributing to society, the vast majority of people work for their own benefit, not for the sake of society or else people would be pursuing things that they actually enjoy. I envy autistic anons whose parents let them be neets. My parents forced me to work awful jobs. My job i straight up got fired in, my second one i had very kind and understanding managers who let me stay away from the till and my current one, i accidently had a little sperg out and I want to quit because of it and I am embarrassed, but there's literally no other jobs near me that will let me not talk to anybody so i am stuck with it until i get fired.

A side note, but i also am a little annoyed at introverted people who are socially successful pretending that they understand me or have anything in common with me when they don't. I know they would die of loneliness if they had my life and literally complain about having no friends when they have people to hang out with, a bf and an overall happy life.

No. 1536333

>feel strongly i'm probably autistic and everything from my childhood to now would make sense
>look up places near me to try look into getting an evaluation
>they're all for children
wtf do i do

No. 1536334

>threw me into school whilst i was non-verbal and got angry about how much time i wasted having to sit with me for speech therapy

Lol I had the same thing. My mother kept my sister back a year as she supposedly “wasn’t ready for school” but me being younger than she would have been (if wasn’t held back) and non-verbal was somehow fine? While I don’t recall them being angry about speech therapy, I do remember showing basic memory problems in the sessions (not being able to remember what I did the day before) and being social awkward but no one mentioned autism that I recall. Looking back it was pretty obvious.

No. 1536335

>>1536333
Find a someone who specialises in diagnosing adult women online and contact them.

No. 1536483

i have so much trouble recognizing or even feeling internal/bodily urges at all. i can genuinely never tell when i am hungry until i get the shakes, get confused, then think of the last time i ate, and only then do i know. i have also gone days without drinking simply because i never feel like it so it slips my mind. i'm probably going to have bladder or kidney problems in the future because i have no idea when i have to go until it hurts so bad and the pain from accidentally holding it in is now starting to last hours if not days. i've never known when i have reached the point of exhaustion until i literally pass out from it. i can't feel anything that is internal in the moment until it gets glaringly painful or obvious

No. 1536625

>>1536483
If I were you I'd set a strict schedule for when I eat and go to the bathroom and then just stick to it every day. Even set alarms if needed. I heard autistic people are soothed by rituals so this should be an ok solution for you. It will pay off in the future and you will be healthier and more long lived as you will not be exhausting your body like now. And tbh it sounds dangerous, these things you do can have disastrous consequences

No. 1536641

>>1536625
I second this. Set a schedule and set alarms on your phone with notes like "time to eat & drink", "use the bathroom". Maybe there's something more discreet you can use in case it seems embarrassing to have your phone go off telling you to use the bathroom. Like an emoji or something that only you know what it means.

No. 1536645

>>1536483
i second this as well, a solid schedule is not only very satisfying but also can benefit you so much long term, nonnie. you dont want to have bladder or kidney problems and be on expensive meds and piss yourself in diapers down the line, prevention is always superior to treatment.
there are many actually great "hot girl" trends going around right now, like waking up and drinking hot lemon water (coffee is fine too but not right as you wake up as you may crash but its great if you want to make yourself poop early)
then you should have a few weeks of trying your hardest to listen to your body and see when its usually ready to come out, could be an hour later or two but you can just sit on the toilet and take your time.
eating something at noon and drinking afterwards would put you into a similar spot, try hard to be cognizant of your schedule if you cant rely on your bodily urges. im sure you can do it if you truly want to nonna.

No. 1536699

>>1536625
>>1536641
>>1536645
thanks for your advice anonettes! a schedule seems like a good solution. i actually did have an app a few years ago that reminded me to drink, iirc you can set something up like that on ios now so i can do different things without much storage. like the last anon said it'll probably help with listening in for cues in the future maybe. i'll incorporate this into my routine!

No. 1536725

>>1536483
anon are you me? I relate to this so much

No. 1536742

Anyone else who struggles immensely with having limits due to Autism and/or ADHD? I have both and I wish I could just be a productive girly like those youtube vlogs. I'm sure those aren't entirely accurate but I just wish I could wake up, do what I needed or planned on doing, and sleep knowing I did so.
Instead I got a part time job and I'm already having anxiety attacks because it tires me out so much, let alone being able to do anything outside of the job because the days off I'm basically recovering mentally.
It made me realize I'm never going to be able to work a full 40 hours a week and it's honestly destroying me a little.

No. 1537030

>>1536742
They are 100% doing all that for the camera. Anyone who really lived like that wouldn’t see the value of filming their “normal” day.

No. 1537106

>>1536742
If it helps, I was like that for years and I'm now much happier and working full time. Mento illness is in nowadays so of course loads of people will film their daily routine and slap an ADHD or autism label on it so they get views. Never feel like you're a failure for not having that life. Don't worry about the future or compare yourself to other people, take life one day at a time, you'll get there.

No. 1537582

>>1537030
>>1537106
Thank you nonnies, that does help, genuinely.
I think it got to me more lately because since the pandemic happened I became a shut in the ways I've only been since my worst bout of depression. And it wasn't even a choice in this case.

No. 1539002

Autistic nonnies, do you think getting an official diagnosis was worth it for you? I'm pretty convinced that I am autistic but I'm terrified of getting an official diagnosis incase it ends up being used against me in a discriminatory way, let alone in the future.

No. 1539040

Anyone else feel really heartbroken about the Audrey Hale case? It's spooked me something crazy reading her story, how she was stuck mentally in middle school because that's the last time she had a friend group? It's opened this big floodgate of emotion I didn't even realize I had, it's uncanny seeing someone so like you and seeing the way other people talk about her. And the way she ended up doing such awful things, that she killed three kids, makes it feel even worse, like I'd never do something like that, but what does it mean that I relate to her backstory? Beyond being a pathetic sperg lol. My life is pretty good overall but reading about her has made me really sad, both her story and how she ended up taking other people's lives. It really makes me wish I could do something to help other autistic girls, because this site is proof a lot of us are lonely.

No. 1539042

>>1539002
I’ve never been discriminated against for having a diagnosis. It disqualifies you from military service I guess. No one has ever asked about it otherwise and you can get disability accommodations for it if you are in college.

No. 1539047

>>1539040
I wish I didn't because what she did was absolutely fucked up and she comes off as a retard. I see a lot of her behavior such as her obsession over her former teammates to be symptomatic of extreme loneliness. I can’t help but feel a bit bad for her because I have struggled with loneliness my whole life. However, she is still incredibly creepy and fucked up to do things like show up at her friend's funeral unannounced and then immediately ask her other friend afterwards if she wanted to hang out. Still, I can get how you feel because I am a pathetic sperg too lmao. Just not as hopeless or emotionally retarded as Audrey was.

No. 1539090

>>1539047
Ultimately, there’s no excuse for what she did, there’s no reason those people she killed had to pay for what she went through. And even before she became a murderer, the way she acted towards her exfriends in her final years of life was very inappropriate. But I know a lot of people like her too, obviously less bad, and it makes me wonder how many of us there are out there. And on some level, I’m afraid something like that could happen again. If people catch on to the fact she was autistic and female, I’m worried they’ll start being afraid of female autists.

No. 1539160

File: 1680422918179.jpg (1.74 MB, 3000x2397, 10976878_fullsize.jpg)

>>1539040
Yes, actually. Of course nothing can justify what she did, but I can't really bring myself to hate her the way I've seen some commenters do. I just feel a really uncanny sense of grief and sadness, and it makes me uncomfortable how much I actually relate to her story prior to the shooting. Being GNC, idealizing the few childhood moments when I felt like I belonged, feeling terribly lonely when I realized my friends would only hang out with me at school and not on our freetime, obsessing unhealthily over crushes (though with me it just results in me distancing myself from them in order to not be seen as creepy). I even did sort of flip out when a friend khs when I was a teen and spent a while in the hospital, fucking hell.

I mean, my life is good now and I have a career and friends (sort of? mostly my colleagues who are also spergs and don't mind me being weird) but it's still painful to acknowledge that I'm not actually able to pass as normal, that people are always going to see me as a weirdo.

No. 1539225

>>1539002
For me the biggest thing it was worth it for was peace of mind, and knowing i wasn't crazy or just terrible at dealing with life. It will also be very useful in the future if I need support or accommodations.
Who would you plan on sharing your diagnosis with? socially, I haven't mentioned it to anyone except my parents and don't plan on telling anyone else. I don't have any close friends that would need to know. Most other people I know already think I'm "autistic-like" but I'm obviously high functioning so there is no need to confirm it or draw attention to it.
It is on my doctor's record of course but haven't experienced any different treatment so far and I'm glad they have known about it for the times I've had panic attacks. But I suppose anything that requires sharing your medical history could lead you to discrimination potentially, unless legally protected. However, unlikely (unless we want to get into hypothetical futuristic dystopian scenarios).
Legally workplaces cannot discriminate against autism. For insurance purposes, my employer's automatically have the information of my diagnosis but it's never come up otherwise as I work from home. However, it's something to bear in mind that some corporations and bosses go overboard with the positive discrimination because they have a quota to fill with disabilities and neurodiversity, which can be embarrassing (and also a big reason why narcissists milk their diagnoses) but if you share with your colleagues it's possible they'll treat you differently, even if you're very high functioning.
Sorry for the long answer but in summation, I think it's worth to not always be wondering why you are the way you are. Cos that fucks with your self-esteem a lot.

No. 1539243

File: 1680441812931.gif (1.97 MB, 498x278, where was i.gif)

how do you deal with disruptions in routine? I had a week earlier this month where I had to leave my home for a few days and deal with stressful stuff, I didn't cope with it very well but now I'm back home and could get back to normal but don't know how. forgot everything i'm meant to be doing.

No. 1540023

>>1535872
same except i'm stuck with the family that treats me like trash, no motivation or self esteem to even get out of the situation.

I don't care about contributing to society, it's all shit and they can all go to hell, but i would like to at least be independent so i don't have to walk on eggshells and get insulted constantly

>>1536483
i have this issue too, i'll have bloody fingernails by the time i realize it's because i've got low blood sugar and need to eat, and by the time i realize i need to pee i have to run to the toilet

>>1539002
depends on where you live, you can get financial help in some countries, it was useless for me tho since we don't have that where we live, there's no help that i can receive as an adult, and disclosing in a workplace or socially would just get you mistreated because their understanding of autism is of only the most extreme cases. and who the fuck knows what the future holds, maybe we'll get a hitler 2.0 that wants to kill the tards, or just some laws that fuck us over. Last time i went to a psych and mentioned my autism she said it was irrelevant to my issues anyway since i appear smart, none of them care or understand it.

No. 1540194

File: 1680545788137.jpg (37.79 KB, 600x419, Black★Rock.Shooter.(Character)…)

I can't let go of all the bitterness and pettiness I have. I have aspergers and ADD but I got diagnosed late in life. Regardless of that it still has affected me my whole life specially in school. I have been falling behind every class ever since I started school because ADD made it hard for me to focus and aspergers made it hard for me to actually understand the stuff we learned and understand orders. It also fucked up my social life and I hated being at school because I could never talk to people and while I was lucky enough to never get bully people did think I was weird. My parents has always been dismissive of my struggles in school and told me to just try harder. When I got my diagnosis they became more sympathetic to my issues. But now they want me to drop out of university because I'm struggling so much and they want me to move in with them again because they think I can't live on my own and while it is the most logical thing to do it just breaks my heart that I have to do that because I don't want to.
I do appreciate that they became more supportive and understanding but honestly all I want is an apology for them. They have dismissed all my problems trough my life telling me that I wasn't trying hard enough, I was being dramatic, I was the one who caused the issue to begin with, etc. I don't blame them for not getting me a diagnosis earlier. This was in a time where people weren't diagnosing kids left and right and they are from a country where mental health is still taboo but I wish they could at least admit that I needed extra help growing up and sometimes other kids where just cruel when they called me weird. I am grateful that they are supportive now but I feel like they didn't even try to understand me as a child and dismiss everything that happened to me and force me to do extra work that I couldn't do and then get mad when I failed at it. I just feel like that pity comes to late

No. 1540325

How to go about shutting up. I ramble, I overshare, I voulenteer information, I tell dont show. I am a quiet, private person in my heart and used to be better about keeping it in check. But I just start going and get really worked up and can't stop. I have maksked as Charismatic, Chill and Funny for so many years I can't drop nor adjust it. This isn't for moids, just being around others period. What do you do? If you want to just shut the fuck up but find a medium between completely mute and word vomit what do you do?

No. 1540667

>>1540325
i relate to this. used to have very bad social anxiety and was basically mute as a child but now i'm older, I ramble and volunteer information that actually makes me feel uncomfortable as i'm saying it.
when someone mentions something i know about or am interested in i get this overwhelming urge to vomit everything i know about the subject onto them and it's very cringe. and it catches people off guard because i come across shy and quiet at first. it feels like I just can't let it pass. and if anyone opens up about their personal life, i will overshare in return even though i absolutely hate it and it makes me feel so stressed afterwards.

not a suggestion but i just deal with it by avoiding talking to people, period and overshare anonymously online instead kek.

No. 1541052

>>1540667
>i just deal with it by avoiding talking to people, period and overshare anonymously online instead kek.
same

No. 1541116

>>1540667
I relate painfull to this. I'm not sure if it's a variety of social anxiety or what, but I dread and avoid social interactions because of how upset it makes me afterwards that I've had to share information with myself. I'm the one who volunteers it, but it always feels like somebody else took over my body and handed it over without my permission after the fact.

No. 1541125

>>1540325
If you can't shut up, then just angle the conversation to be about the other person. Can ramble on and on about something they brought up or interests them, just don't bring it back to yourself and if they ask, lightly answer with consideration abojt not oversharing, but return the topic to outside of yourself.

No. 1541141

>>1540325
I don’t do anything. My therapist I go to who specializes in autism basically just consistently gives me the following two main pieces of advice: 1. take the rest and draw the boundaries you need, and 2. do everything in your power to stop giving a fuck that people find you weird.
My mental health, my overall comfort, and my social life have skyrocketed in quality and richness since committing myself to doing whatever the fuck I want and unabashedly accepting that I am autistic, that I have different needs and boundaries, and that I’m always going to be weird. I don’t make myself smaller or apologize or look down on myself for it now. If people dislike it then I don’t care about them. And it turns out people don’t dislike it as much as I thought. People are surprised, curious, amazed, sometimes even creeped out—and yet they continue to seek out my company, despite how different I am and the weird way I socialize, how I infodump, how strange my interests are and everything. And if they don’t like me they can go fuck themselves. That’s my advice. I’ve lost some connections since accepting myself, and I feel okay with that. I’ve also gained some new ones since realizing I can open up without fear.
Obviously for concrete specific goals like thriving in a work environment for the purpose of making money, it pays to put on a mask and play a character of a more bland palatable normie. For that I tend to be a little on the boring side, erring on the side of caution, giving bland responses, imagining a character to play.
But in random social interactions? No, I’m not gonna do shit to change myself anymore, and now I’m happier than ever. People can go ahead and listen to my 30 minute rant about one of my weird special interests and go “huh… that’s super weird but kind of in a fun way! I thought you were really shy and scary though, I didn’t know you could act this animated!” and it just slides off me or I even enjoy it. I would rather be seen as who I am than spend the rest of my life 24/7 play acting as a thin shadow of something I can never be.

No. 1541164

File: 1680675565072.jpg (12.9 KB, 622x467, FB5mRyPXsAAgpQE.jpg)

I am still not really sure if I have ADD. I am certainly a sperg but I have always had really bad executive functioning issues even on my best days and tend to be distracted easily. I want to not worry about completing things but my brain is horrifically broken wow I really had to be blessed that way

>>1500666
>>1519362
>>1532719
me too nonnies. 80% of the time it just makes me want to get run over but at this point I'm just hoping for the best and trying not to freak myself out by thinking about my future anymore
>>1539040
>how she was stuck mentally in middle school because that's the last time she had a friend group
I honestly haven't been keeping up with it but this is so similar to me ouch

No. 1541342

>>1541125
this is good advice.

No. 1541890

>>1541125
ntayrt but can you give an example of how this might work? I'd really like to practice this.

Also… has anyone noticed how anti-autism this site has gotten at the moment? I know all imageboards have a history of mocking it and I'm not really talking about the light insults that can sometimes be thrown around or used as jokes. I mean that there's a real aggressive anti-autism rhetoric on here lately that seems to be everywhere on /ot/ and I think the recent Audrey Hale case has caused a nasty explosion of it in the FtM thread too. I always assumed a large chunk of nonnies had autism themselves or some other kind of neurodivergency, so the weird vitriol and backwards talking points I've been seeing everywhere have been really getting to me. I've been thinking of taking a break for awhile until nonnies go back to normal, or maybe just browsing /m/… is it just me? I swear anons haven't been so aggro about autists in awhile.

No. 1541927

I'm really sensitive, sensory issues, discomfort in a physical body, obsessive behavior. My family says I have no empathy and wouldn't care if they died. I always score high on the do you have autism quizzes but at the same time, not all squares are rectangles. I can understand sarcasm and literary analysis but I can't take a hint or read social cues. I don't know if a diagnosis would help this deep into adulthood. I've always felt like there was something wrong with me and I don't know what. It seems like very mentally ill girls or neurodivergent girls are the only type that seem to understand me, I can relate to their thoughts and experiences.

No. 1541976

>>1541927
Self diagnose then.

No. 1542038

>>1541927
There’s two types of empathy anon. Cognitive and emotional. You probably have cognitive meaning you can care if you think about how the other person feels and can understand it, but you don’t feel what they feel when you see it in front you. I. E. You don’t feel sad watching them cry just confused, but reading a sad story where it explains the characters pov makes you sad (very simple and poor example). Does that sound similar to you? Sorry the no empathy thing doesn’t sound fair if you relate and understand women on the spectrum. If your own the spectrum you could have alexithymia I do. It makes it hard to feel your emotions and grasp them to process in the moment. More like lots of physical sensations to me and sometimes it affects the speed of my thoughts more than the content. Everyone is different though. If you think you are and can’t get an appointment. Nothing is stopping you from applying advice meant for ASD women in your life. Maybe try making a few adjustments and see if you do better?

No. 1542212

>>1541890
>Audrey Hale case has caused a nasty explosion of it in the FtM thread
nasty KF moid explosion more like. ever since the Hale thing, that thread has been littered with them. not sure I've noticed more elsewhere in general but depends what threads you're looking on i guess. I think a lot of nonas, even ones who are autistic themselves, hate on male autism more than anything.

No. 1542281

you know the dril i am not officially diagnosed my parents took me to a doctor as a child but it didn't go anywhere because i am a girl they just thought i am difficult out of spite anyway as a person who feels like i am def autistic it's just sometimes so frustrating in work etc social situations that in theory i understand what's going on because i've learned and studied how people behave and i remember how i was treated at school etc as this kind of pet retard, like for example just now my co workers kinda bully me and treat me like i am a complete idiot, because in the social situations itself yes i often act stupid yes i often don't know how to read the social cues because it doesn't come for me naturally, but at the same time i am painfully aware how the situation is how and why i am seen as an idiot and how i should react and act to be seen as normal because in theory i understand it all. i know they're lying to me and using my certain naivete as advantage and then i catch on and remember oh shit they're doing these kind of social games now but i am not able to react in the situation itself and i am still the pet retard.

No. 1542293

>>1542281
samefag i know this is so stupid thing and example to get worked up for but for example, i work at military where we use codes for different things and so on. i needed something and sent my co workers what i need with the code, with small typo. they all start acting as if they have no idea what i am talking about, first they accidentally use the non-code name in the chat which revealed that they knew what i meant but deleted the messages, and kept acting as if they have no idea what i am talking about. at first i take it at face value, i reply to them oh i need this and that, and they keep going on wtf are you talking about, and then i finally catch on that they're just fucking with me because it is easy. i don't know i just got so angry i actually started shaking like they need to make such a small thing like very small typo into some pecking order thing at our work chat where everyone can see. and were still civilians and not actual military personel so we don't actually need to be that anal about the codes if there is a typo or not.

No. 1542306

>>1542293
they were bullying you. report it

No. 1542442

File: 1680829735675.jpg (394.52 KB, 2257x1715, 81157874_p0.jpg)

A couple of days ago I went for a screening for autism with a psychologist as I wanted to know whether or not I had it as I always suspected it since I was younger as my behaviour and interest didn't often align with people around my age and the fact that when I was younger a classmate of mine asked if I had it which I didn't even know what that was at the time until much later.
What I wanted to ask is the fact that the psychologist had halfway into the interview confirmed my suspicion based on the pitch of my voice and body language particularly the way I was sitting on the sofa for example when I heard that I had struggled to either sit up straighter or gain my composure as I was crying with this revelation as I was actually hoping it was untrue. There was more however, I don't really remember it. Is it normal to get a confirmation so easily? While I'm not diagnosed as the psychologist wants to speak to my father and I have to come back later for further testing as the psychologist wants me to get evaluated for autism and I want to as I want to understand it better and give it to the university I'm going in to show that I'm not a terrible student, just that I have difficulties with adjusting to it.
Also the psychologist told me I most likely have ADHD which I was surprised to hear as I never suspected that and only thought I had diagnosed dyslexia and maybe autism.
One more question is why has aspergers fallen out and instead the use of autism spectrum has become more normalised? Asking because I had tried to look for a screening test for aspergers years ago in my country but could never find one. Picunrel

No. 1542458

>>1542442
Aspergers no longer exists in the dsm and was grouped under autism diagnosis with a few other diagnoses in dsm-5 which came out in 2013, that'd now probably be referred to as "autism level 1". Because it became better understood that rather than being two separate phenomenon, and it being hard to tease out the criteria for one condition and not the other, combining them into one diagnosis makes sense.

https://www.spectrumnews.org/opinion/viewpoint/why-fold-asperger-syndrome-into-autism-spectrum-disorder-in-the-dsm-5/

Which is what I was diagnosed with when I got my autism diagnosis in 2021. Personally, I see the benefits of both having the Aspergers as separate diagnosis, or group it under a wider autism umbrella diagnosis for people with this level of social disability where they can mostly function on their own and don't have an intellectual disability. I hope over time a better, more precise diagnoses that chart specific levels of social, emotional, intellectual, and intellectual disability/challenges/needs evolves.

Also, Asperger was a nazi collaborator and sent children to their deaths. Sometimes it seems superficial to rename terms because the labels seem problematid, but imo it's good here when he was part of and enabled a very evil system. It's sick to name a condition after someone who sent children with disabilities to death, vs. other people (many women!) in psychology like Lorna Wing who made strides.

Link about Asperger and mentions book which I recommend
https://www.vox.com/platform/amp/conversations/2018/5/22/17377766/asperger-nazi-rename-syndrome

No. 1544422

Nonnies, how to know if I am possibly autistic or not? Not that I want to use your answers to autodiagnose myself and post all over Tumblr like an attention whoring tumblr-chan or anything but honestly I always have felt that I am too weird to be a neurotypical and at least that would give me a good pointer to see if I should seek an official diagnosis (when I get the resources to it) or if I should bury that questioning alltogether. I will left unsaged because, honestly, I hope to get more answers this way. I mean I am not socially inept, I can do things and don't have much of social anxiety but there is some weirdness when I interact with other people. I can't maintain eye contact when talking with other people. I can talk about a lot of subjects but I just feel weird about my tone of voice/timing so I most keep listening in group talk.
There's also my hobbies. Some of them are very normie-like, like literature or cinema, but at the same time I like anime, am a fujo-chan and kpop-chan and have interests that I get too fixed about like dolls and doll collecting in general (I have two other interests that I am super fixated too but I can't say since though they are not niche it would be identifiable still). And I tend to get fixated on some random subjects from time to time, which is very much a waste of time when coupled with my procrastination tendencies.
I used to behave more weirder when I was younger. I often sat all alone and kept either reading/drawing/daydreaming during recess. So much that some people thought I was a huge retard maybe except that I got the best grades in class so I dunno. That stopped when I was in 6th grade thankfully.
I don't have stims which seem a common thing in autistic people, maybe except if you guys count picking my own skin as one. It is awful because I have marks all over my arms and legs (though I do effort to hide them and don't go outside a lot which helps), but it is automatic and it gives me something to distract and it is soothing though it is literally self harm.
Idk what to do. I feel like I am odd one out but I wouldn't give a single fuck if that didn't affect things like finding a job (that is admittely a source of anxiety for me, not the working part but the selection part), I hate being rejected but honestly I am tired of not being a productive member of society. That just heightens my suicidal thoughts and feeling useless. If somehow I could get a job without doing all the hiring process part it would be perfect but I am not a heiress kek.
Sorry if it is confusing to read. I can give more details and answer questions if you guys have them. But any kind of help would be greatly appreciated, nonitchkas.

No. 1544431

>>1542442
Yes, it often is that easy. I was given a ton of related/false diagnoses my whole life and slid under the radar because my parents didn’t follow up on doctors’ suggestions of autism, but when I finally went in to an autism specialist it was insanely easy and fast, they flat out told me after 1 hour they were certain they could diagnose me based on my history. I don’t have the same paperwork I’d get from the several hours of tests costing several thousand dollars, but they even told me it was optional for me and up to if I wanted it or not because their confidence was so high already. So yeah it can be easy despite how the internet claims “all doctors will doubt you and you’ll meet 20 doctors who say you can’t be autistic because you’re a girl,” tbh I think some of those people just don’t have it kek, doctors may miss it in girls but when they know they’re specifically looking for autism then they rarely miss it once they start testing you and asking you the relevant questions.
>>1544422
Autism is a developmental disorder that significantly impacts social and life function. See a specialist if you think your behavior and struggles warrant it. The world has many awkward people who watch anime and pick their skin and aren’t disabled but we cannot judge based solely off an internet post.

No. 1544471

>>1544431
Sorry, nona. I didn't want to be a bother, didn't realize the thread was only for diagnosed nonas. Nevermind.

No. 1544593

>>1544471
No worries that is just my actual advice how to know if you are or not, the only way to get a truly substantial opinion on it is to see a specialist, ideally one with experience with autistic girls/women and adults in general if at all possible and not just those centers that are totally focused on little kids. You could be or you could not be based on your post it is too hard to say and while I think doing more research online can help tilt your suspicions in the right direction, you likely cannot know 100% for sure until you meet with a specialist equipped to give autism diagnoses. If your post had some more glaringly obvious stuff like mention of extreme social and sensory difficulties and regular violent breakdowns then I’d feel comfortable telling you I heavily suspect it, but what you described can be the traits of some autistic individuals or also the traits of some allistic individuals, so you would need both more research and ideally a professional consultation to know.

No. 1544690

>>1544593
I have never had a breakdown but I feel insanely overwhelmed by lights and like to stay in dark unless it is absolutely necessary. Noises too but those can be manageable. I am a picky eater because lots of textures and tastes bother me a lot and my nails are always short because I hate the feeling of them digging on my skin when they are growing up. I hate the sensation of combing my hair or brushing my teeth (I do them both don't worry, but I don't comb my hair daily if I can get away with it kek). Idk if those would count as sensory issues.
Another issue that I have is that I take things too seriously and have trouble touching other people. I feel uncomfortable with them crying next to me or just chewing. Hell I hate standing close to crying kids or loud teens. Or any crowd in general. I avoid most of it but I can force myself if I have to do something.
I guess I will have to find a way to get some money and save to a psychiatrist. They are insanely expensive in my country and not all of them are specialized in autism so I will see how I can get a diagnosis.

No. 1544964

Can we please make a separate thread for people that aren't yet sure if they have autism or not? This isn't in response to anyone in particular, it just gets a bit frustrating to see the same basic questions asked over and over. I don't blame people for asking but it can disrupt the discussion a bit.

Unsure people would also benefit from having a first post laying out info and links since it can be hard to find good female information online.

No. 1545784

I am so frustrated about adhd. I have an exam tomorrow and I feel so unprepared despite cramming for a whole week. I can't concentrate on my notes. I also did some exams for another class, i did a decent job studying, but on the day of the exam it's like is straight up got amnesia. It was really fucking upsetting and I ended up failing. My most recent exam, this happened to me again, except i managed to pass with an ok grade. I know grades don't matter because c gets degrees, but I am totally sick of feeling like i have potential to excel in certain things and I have a decent interest in the things i am studying in, but my memory is so fucking awful and I can't centrate for 20 minutes. It's so fucking annoying working so hard, but getting the same results as somebody who barely tries, is lazy and goes out every night partying. To top it off, i might fail one of my classes just because I forgot to hand in a piece of work and procrastinated informing my professor about this. I also have another piece of work i didn't hand in and I have been procrastinating completing it for almost 2 months even though I can do it at any time and it's literally half done, all because there was one question that was really hard to do. I also only got my diagnosis in the middle of the semester, too late to get special accommodations like extra time which i REALLY needed for the courses where you have to memorise formulas and shit, also so my professors can understand that my autism makes me struggle with group work, i literally had a mental break down when i had to find a group on my own and all the groups were full… It was so embarrassing, i had to hold in my tears so much. I feel so embarrassed to ask for help for stuff related to adhd because i have it in my head that nobody will believe me and think i am making everything up.

No. 1545827

>>1544964
This is a good point, if we can work on putting together a FAQ and resources thing for the top of new threads that would be awesome. Maybe the official diagnostic criteria, important studies on female autism that could be enlightening for people to read, reputable sites discussing adult female autism, that kind of thing.

No. 1545865

>>1544964
>>1545827
I second this, maybe some kind of google doc anons can contribute to can work?

No. 1546039

>>1545827
>>1545865
be prepared for absolutely no one to read it because no one reads OPs

No. 1546042

>>1545784
poor nonnie do you take meds for adhd?

No. 1546135

>>1542458
>Aspergers no longer exists in the dsm and was grouped under autism diagnosis with a few other diagnoses in dsm-5 which came out in 2013, that'd now probably be referred to as "autism level 1". Because it became better understood that rather than being two separate phenomenon, and it being hard to tease out the criteria for one condition and not the other, combining them into one diagnosis makes sense.
The DSM-5 is not a universal standard and many countries (including mine) still to this day in 2023 give out Asperger as a valid diagnosis.

It wasn't a justifiable merge to me because everyone already knew they were related conditions, just as we all know ADHD is related to autism but we don't call ADHD "autism level 4", and having a clear distinction is more useful for everyone involved. For example something like "my child is autistic" could now mean "my child can read and write far above their level and is aceing every test at school but struggles with sarcasm and that makes it hard for them to make friends" or it could mean "my child has little to no social awareness whatsoever, can barely speak and spends all day every day listening to the simpsons intro over and over but doesn't watch the show". If I go to an autism support group and they are aimed at helping lower functioning people I get no help and feel alienated. If I go to a an autism support group aimed at high function people then the lower functioning people get no help instead. If it's a mix of high/low function help, then still half the time and resources will be for things not aimed at the end I'm at. They are so different they might as well be different conditions. That's why they stupidly have "levels" now instead, to fix a problem they created that didn't exist before.

Sorry for sperging nonas, I just feel autisticly passionate about it lmao

No. 1546384

>>1546039
Even if they don't, the same old questions can be directed to it instead of having a new response each time. My autism loves efficiency.

No. 1546389

Yes I'm an ugly aspie but you know what? I'd rather get pumped and dumped by normal guys than date aspie guys. I'm dating one now and it SUCKS, it's my first time dating ever at 29. I got so caught up in being this perfect super understanding partner (that I always wanted for myself). I cater to his every need and his 1000 sensitivities and depressive meltdowns. He's over the moon about finally meeting someone who gets him, for the first time ever. Yet I'm miserable. I have ONE event that's stressing me out and he barely cares.

The only other man who was ever interested in me (recently too) was a super handsome guy who was funny, charming, asked me out for dinner at an actual restaurant, and texted me every day. He was so caring. And I rejected him because "oh he'd never fully get me, only another autistic person could" but no. I don't care about being 10000% understood anymore. Maybe a normie boyfriend would think I said and did some retarded shit but at least he'd ask me how my day was at work and fucking care when I'm upset. Idc anymore fuck me and throw me away as long as you're able to care about MY pleasure for 1 night or ask if I'm hungry or thirsty or BE ABLE TO LAUGH AT MY JOKE WHEN THEY ARE FUNNY.

No. 1546395

>>1546135
This. One of the links posted above also pointed out that it's going it make it even harder for women to get diagnosed and more will end up with a BPD or vague anxiety diagnosis instead.

The fact that people still use Aspergers, use "what used to be called Aspergers", use "high functioning autism" wrong, and say "a bit autistic" shows that there is clearly a need for a term to separate people. Even if it was just something like "type 1 can live independently, and type 2 can't live independently" it would be really useful.

Was any autistic person actually asking for the change? I'm guessing not.

No. 1546397

>>1546389
Doesn't have to be either way anon. Level up your looks and then just go on a lot of first dates (like aim for at least 50) until you find a hottie who is not a jerk. Be picky and don't settle for less.

No. 1546566

Celebrities you think are undiagnosed autistic?

Dita von Teese
Harold Bloom
Lana del Rey
Richard Francis Burton
Caroline Calloway

No. 1546568

>>1546566
Hannah Louise Poston

No. 1546639

today was a rough day. i'm just so tired of feeling so stupid all the time. i can't focus, and i just feel trapped in an endless loop. i'm about to cry and go to bed but i feel so defeated. i feel so overwhelmed, i'm shutting down and snapping at everything when i'm not feeling apathy. this isn't how i want to live and i feel incapable of fixing it. i keep telling myself tomorrow will be better but i just dread the cycle starting over again.

No. 1547111

>>1546566
Bella Hadid

No. 1547119

UKfags, any success stories of getting formally diagnosed on the NHS? I'm getting desperate

No. 1547541

File: 1681324389465.gif (563.41 KB, 220x279, 1331316521855.gif)


No. 1547584

>>1547541
She's confirmed diagnosed as ADHD and comes across like she doesn't really know who she is. Not all female autists are obvious spergs.

No. 1547591

>>1539040
Definitely a tragedy on all parts. I kind of relate to her as an autistic girl and I've been trying to find more of her internet footprint. I think audrey was lonely but I think she is a sick and sadisitc individual. Though I am lonely due to my awkwardness and social ineptness I would never have wished harm among the friends who have created distance with me throughout the years.
I definitely agree with you though. Autistic girls need community just as much as regular people.

No. 1548286

>>1547584
im not hot and consider myself below or near average but i feel really bad for female autists who are really attractive. they must never get taken seriously like ever. like i'm bullied enough as an average woman i can't imagine the gaslighting pretty autist women get from both men and women

No. 1548474

>>1547584
she got that ADHD diagnosis because she and her mommy wanted dat adderall for weight loss

No. 1548763

>>1541890

I always kind of assumed that much of the hate of autists/aspies on image boards/chans were contextually either self-deprication or self-protection from self-hating spergs - especially factoring in that these boards/cultures are supposedly ruled by a high frequency of autists?

No. 1548879

>>1548474
Seems to be the opposite? She was diagnosed with bipolar, then ADHD, then developed anorexia from the meds. I don't doubt that her mother likely caused some of it but Bella has been pretty open about things so I'm not sure why she would lie about this.


https://professionalwomanmag.com/2022/01/bella-hadid-opens-excruciating-debilitating-mental-health-struggles/

https://www.vogue.com/article/bella-hadid-cover-april-2022

No. 1549778

>>1545784
THIS. Omg I totally feel you! I spent literally my own life like that, with my mom telling me since I was in elementary school “at your age I would be able to do my homework by my own, why can’t you do the same?! You’re so intelligent, why wouldn’t you put more effort in your studies?”. I lived like this literally until I finished high school, and it didn’t stop to my mom, but also the teachers and the psychologists I went to during my whole life always told me that I should “concentrate more” and “limit distractions” and also “study more” and such. I’ve accepted that I basically suck at school and in studies, and apparently my mom had accepted it too. All of this mess stopped when I found out about ADHD through a friend of mine who has it diagnosed from a very long time. This friend gave me the number of her neuropsychiatrist, and it literally took one and and half session for this doctor to diagnose me with ADHD, like, it was so clear…. Now I’m doing other tests about logical thinking and such (there’s basically a whole lifetime to unpack, lol) with her in order to formulate a complete diagnosis, and after all of these years of being misdiagnosed (?) I almost feel excited that everything is falling on the right place.

It literally took me a lifetime to go to my mom and tell her “I’m sorry I’m not able to study on my own, but I literally did my best and I couldn’t do more than that”. She did what she could, and I hope that something will change now

No. 1550509

>>1546395
nayrt, but I agree and it annoys me in the same sense in that appearently they're currently trying to get rid of the terms "high" and "low" functioning.
Just makes me so mad. Like I don't care if it makes someone feel bad. The spectrum is huge, you can't just go "everyone's a little bit low functioning sometimes!" when on one end you can hold jobs and have normal relationships, and the other end can't speak, eat, or go to the bathroom.

No. 1550582

>>1550509
Since writing that, I learned that there does seem to be some sort of system similar to what I said:

https://theplaceforchildrenwithautism.com/diagnosing-autism/the-three-levels-of-autism

>ASD Level 1: Requiring Support

>ASD Level 2: Requiring Substantial Support
>ASD Level 3: Requiring Very Substantial Support

Clearly its not working though.

No. 1550625

Can I be an aspie if I dont struggle with reading between the lines/sarcasm/irony/picking up body language etc? I have no problem with the input, its the output Im struggeling with. Like I know what the other person is feeling in the conversation, I just dont know how to respond. Or often I do know how to respond, I just worry about formulating it properly or I go all mute. Like a lot of the times I know what to say, I just cant bring myself to say anything.

No. 1551643

what does autism testing consist of? I’m considering getting tested. I was in therapy for 8 years as a teen for ED and selfharm. I was hospitalized and in outpatient therapy for years and years. My sisters and I were really neglected as kids and cps got involved. I was diagnosed with MDD, anxiety and PTSD. They wouldn’t diagnose me with BPD because I wasn’t 18 yet but exhibited symptoms. I stopped going to therapy or taking meds when I turned 18. Im 23 now and don’t doubt that I have depression and PTSD but I really think I am and was autistic. My sisters think we all are. I stim a lot and have major meltdowns from normal social interactions. I still get the urge to selfharm a lot literally just from being overwhelmed. I don’t understand sarcasm and I have the hardest time socializing. I’m a NEET SAHM who has never been able to hold down a job and I’m thankful to even have a husband to support me because I would probably be a homeless crackhead if I didn’t tbh. I dropped out of high school even though I was top of my class purely because I was suicidal from socializing and the pressure I felt at school everyday. I had panic attacks so often I had SPED privileges that let me go sit in the library whenever I needed to for my anxiety. It’s all clicking I think I’m autistic. Idk how my therapist and treatment team never caught it? None of my treatment really helped besides teaching me how to stop cutting myself (tragic) I never integrated into society besides being a caring person

No. 1552013

>>1550625
Yes, I think so as I'm the same. I think things around aspies sometimes get a bit black and white in thinking, like you must get everything or nothing.

I don't tend to have issues with people I know well but I get thrown by people being sarcastic but not using a sarcastic tone if I don't know them.

I used to be quiet a lot at school, not because I was shy, but because I just did not know what to say to people.

And I often get people thinking I'm stuck up because I'm quiet and don't have "warm" body language. I know the things people do but it's not really automatic for me and sometimes I do it wrong and seem weird,

No. 1552014

>>1551643
Sounds like the common overlooked female aspie experience. Testing can vary but usually involves being interviewed by a psychiatrist and having someone you know fill in a form about you (they should be able to work around if you don't have anyone). Make sure the person testing you is familiar with adult female autism so they test you correctly.

No. 1552064

>>1550625
>>1552013
that just sounds like social anxiety, not autism, but a doctor will probably diagnose it however you want

No. 1552451

>>1552064
No, social anxiety is being afraid of social situations. The first anon does have aspects of that but not knowing how to respond is more aspie. Female autists often get misdiagnosed with anxiety first.

No. 1552770

I hate how limited NTs are in conversation. It's like they cannot cope when you bring up something and their measly brain cannot see an obvious connection to whatever they were talking about. They push it back onto us and make it seem like we're the problem, being weird, or random. They just suck at making connections and seeing patterns or are just too limited to take something unexpected and roll with it.

Like, I accept so many senseless things NTs do on a daily basis without commenting but do one small thing that doesn't follow their way of doing something and they have to make a big deal about it.

Also when you realise that the reason people laugh at people falling over and whatnot is because they are not seen as "behaving like a human" anymore, it makes you realise why NTs treat us so terribly. They don't see us as human.

No. 1552801

>>1552451
>not knowing how to respond is more aspie
NTA but ain't no way I'm autistic and I'm like this. Social anxiety makes you clam up and then you can' think of anything. Especially if you avoid interacting with people because of the anxiety, then it only gets worse. Not saying she's one or the other but it really isn't that simple.

No. 1552811

>>1552801
That's not what I meant. I can often be is social situations in groups, perfectly calm and comfortable. I want to join in but I don't know how. Nothing comes to mind. I don't know the rules.

If do manage to say something and I'm not masking strongly, then it's weird and doing things wrong.

No. 1552885

>>1550625
aspergers is much more than struggling with communication. You could be an aspie but then again I know plenty of non-autists who experience what you described. it's hard to judge from one post on an anonymous imageboard. Try reaching out to other autists and see if you can relate to them or read about other symptoms and autistic experience. If a lot of that stuff resonates with you then try to see if you can get an official diagnosis

No. 1552888

>>1552770
> the reason people laugh at people falling over and whatnot is because they are not seen as "behaving like a human" anymore, it makes you realise why NTs treat us so terribly. They don't see us as human.
kek wut

No. 1552924


No. 1553013

>>1549778
Thank you anon. I have been stuck in school for well over the amount of time that is expected of me too. I failed two university courses, ran out of funding for them, was hurried along into community college and now i am probably going to settle for an associates degree and pray it actually gets me a job. I take ritalin, but i often feel like it's not working or i have trouble recognizing that i need to top to up. My parents don't give a shit about my diagnosises because they know it's their fault i am struggling because they refused to get autism testing as a child and keep downplaying it and gas lighting me every time i bring it up. I could probably live never knowing i had autism tbh, i managed to drag myself along with my horrid social skills pretty well by literally keeping silent and trying my best to police my speech when i am forced fo talk. Idk, adhd has ruined my life and caused me to waste so much of my life and the fact that my parents don't give a fuck and refuse to understand my struggles is making everything more difficult. People in general that i have talked to irl prior to the diagnoses would feed the notion that i need to pretend my problems don't exist much like my parents, it's gotten to the point where i did believe i was doing this all to myself. I am scared to bring it up because i know i will get irritating speeches about how negative i am and that i can overcome autism and adhd and i shouldn't let them control me… i really hate normies.

No. 1553049

>>1552811
Do you think being neurotypical means being a perfect Stacy who is never awkward or shy? You aren't autistic.

No. 1553105

>>1553049
Thank you for your assessment Dr. Lolcow.

No. 1553188

>>1553105
Congrats on being normal, nona

No. 1553266

>>1553188
The psychiatrist that assessed me before will be pleased to hear it /s

Seriously though, why are anons so obsessed with being the only autist in the thread here.

No. 1553449

File: 1681846534609.png (84.65 KB, 356x643, autismtranslaed.png)

I'm trying to figure out how common being a TERF is for autistic women. we all hear about how trans & enby identities are super common for neurodiverse people but it never made sense to me (both the gender shit and why it's popular with autistic people, especially). I cannot accept trans ideology because it's completely illogical and even pretending to understand it would be a lie. I would have thought this would be the same issue for way more aspies than I'm seeing. is it just that all the autistic spaces online shut down all debate and maybe people are too afraid/confused to speak out?

picrel is a now deleted post, that had one or two comments in agreement but mostly comments scolding and "educating" her. one comparing her to a nazi. I know it's a woman on reddit so it's not that surprising but it's only the second time I've seen someone bring it up in an autistic group (the first time being on a facebook group and that very sweet, polite and well-spoken woman got banned too).

I thought it was well understood that many of us have trouble understanding social things and are sticklers for logic. hell, that's why so many of us are gender non-conforming in the first place, because gender is made up social stereotypes that make no sense. I know some of us are more attuned to fantasy and magical thinking whereas others, like me, cannot even engage in fiction. I suspect this is a big part of it. what are your thoughts and experiences nonnies?

No. 1553457

>>1553449
>I'm trying to figure out how common being a TERF is for autistic women
>I thought it was well understood that many of us have trouble understanding social things and are sticklers for logic
I have always attributed my terfism to my autism. I do not have an innate need to be accepted in a way that I would naturally start going against logic

No. 1553483

>>1553449
>>1553457
Good lord you do not need autism to observe basic things like sexual dimorphism. A huge majority of trannies are autist too so the logic doesn’t hold at all.

No. 1553491

>>1553483
>you do not need autism to observe basic things
no one said that. i'm the first anon and my post is trying to figure out why so many autistic people don't question trans logic. we are normally sticklers and often outspoken when things aren't logical.

and the other anon - as I understood it - was saying that these are the qualities she attributes to being a TERF by default. not that neurotypical people can't have the same (that's obvious).

No. 1553495

>>1553491
Being a terf is just your special interest right now

No. 1553541

>>1553457
%99 of women are terfs even though they might not identify as one because they think women deserve equal rights but don't see trannies as women.

No. 1553552

>>1553449
>>1553491
I feel like gender non-conformity and troonery is highly predatory to autistic people, particularly women. I completely understand where that poster was coming from, i never used to understand why being a woman or a man was such a big deal if it's something you can't control and why there was so many rules on how to be whatever gender aside from just being born as one. Autistic people usually enquire about social norms a lot more than the typical neurotypical people and receiving this kind of backlash from tras was obviously going to throw them into the laps of radfems who are thrilled to talk to them and probably actually relate to them a little. I did see a video that stated a high proportion of autistic people suffer from gender issues, imo this probably stems from the fact that a lot of autistic people in general have a lot of identity issues from not being to understand their own feelings and constant masking. I don't typically like the therapist from vid related because i don't like the fact he bothers with incels, but this video was interesting, aside from the fact he is probably pro-transition.

No. 1553553

>>1553449
>>1553491
I feel like gender non-conformity and troonery is highly predatory to autistic people, particularly women. I completely understand where that poster was coming from, i never used to understand why being a woman or a man was such a big deal if it's something you can't control and why there was so many rules on how to be whatever gender aside from just being born as one. Autistic people usually enquire about social norms a lot more than the typical neurotypical people and receiving this kind of backlash from tras was obviously going to throw them into the laps of radfems who are thrilled to talk to them and probably actually relate to them a little. I did see a video that stated a high proportion of autistic people suffer from gender issues, imo this probably stems from the fact that a lot of autistic people in general have a lot of identity issues from not being to understand their own feelings and constant masking. I don't typically like the therapist from vid related because i don't like the fact he bothers with incels, but this video was interesting, aside from the fact he is probably pro-transition.

No. 1553576

>>1551643
my experience with getting my diagnosis is probably different than others since I went to get tested for ADHD but they concluded I also had autism.
I got interviewed together with my mother where they asked about my childhood and my relationship with school. I was 16 at the time though so I don't know if you need a parent there if you are an adult.
I also took an IQ test which involves stuff like memory tasks, logic tasks and common knowledge questions(a real IQ test is screened by a psychiatristx don't believe those bullshit online quizzes). Btw IQ doesn't really determine autism since there are autists with high, low and average IQ. I think the point of this section is more just to see what sort of help you need.
I also went trough a private interview where I would just talk about myself and my interests and hobbies. When I got my diagnosis they said that I was fidgety and couldn't hold eye contact so I think they look after those things in the one-on-one interview they also asked if they could record this interview, which I agreed to and I regret it to this day but that's beside the point. Honestly it was a pleasant experience for me but I think it depends on the psychiatrists you get. None of the questions they asked where invasive

No. 1553709

>special interest is learning languages
>autism affects verbal abilities
why just why

even worse when I take lessons and during free conversation all my brain power is already diverted towards trying to act normal and remembering what I did recently

No. 1553916

>>1553709
I have been learning a language for a few years now and whenever someone puts me on the spot to say something I completely forget everything and can't think of a single thing to say. social situations turn me into a bumbling idiot, even when I'm being asked a basic question on a topic that I might be an expert in.

this happened recently in front of my mum, where I was asked a question on a topic I know well from someone and I said "I don't know" - my mum interjected and said "what?! yes you do! you talk about this all the time!" but I just couldn't verbalise my thoughts at that time so it's easier to say I don't know. I hate it.

No. 1553933

>>1553449
Every autist but one that I know is a terf. The last one is a guy who says he is enby/trans despite "not believing in gender". He's a loner gamer with trans gamer friends so he'll do his best to explain troonism using logic and science. Naturally he gets it all wrong and doesn't listen to real women so I dropped him for being a hypocritical sexist pig.

I think part of what makes autists more vulnerable to trans ideology is that we take things literally and don't understand social cues. So there's a portion that gets told "taking estrogen makes you female and all your problems will go away!" and they literally believe that will be true and they don't understand that handmaidens saying "omg ur so pretty gurl" when they objectively look like shit is just to be polite. And having been a loser all your life and seeing this group love-bomb you is going to make you want to never leave.

But then again almost every single detrans person I've seen have been autistic, or am now getting tested for it because they have clear signs of it. So it seems autists are also the ones who get out of it easier once they realized it was all lies and they didn't magically turn into a woman like they had been told. Of course then they're too socially inept to understand that all the other trans people just keep their mouth shut about all the dark sides and their autist selves start speaking out against trans ideology.

I really think being an autist makes you more likely to be a terf, to be a victim of trans ideology and to be the one who gets out of the ideology (and then becomes a terf) all at once.

No. 1553965

been starting to suspect myself of autism (i have add, diagnosed) but i can't recall ever having problems with eye contact. not sure if i've ever actually had a special interest either.

>>1553933
wish i was you. every autistic i know is a tif, or otherwise getting their. i feel like gender ideology offers a lot of "fun" rules and guidelines autistic people might enjoy.

No. 1553975

>>1553965
*there
i'm so fucked

No. 1554073

>>1553933
>taking things literally
good point. this is probably a big part of it. "do you feel uncomfortable with your body? you should chop your tits off and you'll feel much better" = giving he/they autistic women not only an explanation for their discomfort but also a "cure". and when it turns out it probably just makes them feel even less comfortable (cos losing sensation in your chest doesn't sound too comfy) the illusion is shattered.
the fact that pretty much all autistic orgs promote this is absolutely vile.

No. 1554191

File: 1681926277426.png (363.47 KB, 1174x1960, 1529811052069.png)

>>1553916
I've pretty much accepted that I'm only going to ever be intermediate at speaking (can get my ideas across but not always correctly) and will never have a good accent. I'm tired of relearning the same grammar points over and over as I'm too spergy to practise output. Recently I've started studying ancient languages instead to feel less pressure as they skew more input focused.

I'm terrible at doing things on the spot. I have a STEM degree but I struggle to do basic maths or anything with more than 2 steps if I feel someone is watching me. I'd happily take the most basic job if I could. I'm afraid to sign up for unemployment as it's hard to explain this.

picrel

No. 1554302

>>1553965
Yeah no wonder you write like a tard.

No. 1554998

>>1554191
>have a STEM degree but I struggle to do basic maths if I feel someone is watching me
YES. and when i try to explain it to people they think i'm simply afraid of being judged… that's not quite it, because I will have the same issue in front of people I know are not judging me. I think it's a lot to do with multi-tasking or getting overloaded by the communication and social aspect. and being "observed" is the worst feeling ever.

it's also performance or anything that involves focus and brain-power. for example I love playing piano and have been practising some really challenging pieces with good results at home. but I can barely play chopsticks in front of anyone. i don't necessarily feel that nervous i just literally forget how to play instruments. and I don't know how to overcome that.
kek at the last comment in that pic btw.

No. 1555003

>>1552770
>I hate how limited NTs are in conversation. It's like they cannot cope when you bring up something and their measly brain cannot see an obvious connection to whatever they were talking about

Nonnie, that's unironically incredibly autistic of you kek. Of course people aren't going to get the absolutely random ass connection you made in your head from one topic to another. And I say that as someone that often gets told so. But it's not them being meanies or 'limited' it's us being the fucking retards and it's fine to admit that.

No. 1555109

>>1554998
Exactly. It's like the part of my brain required for doing these things just switches off and refuses to be turned back on. I know what I'm doing is wrong but my brain either won't access the parts it needs or won't record what I am being told. On top of this I have ADHD which means sometimes I miss really obvious things in front of me.

I've had some people treat me really rudely or like I'm an idiot in these situations. I have a high (tested) IQ as well.

No. 1555928

>>1473042
Nonnie late as fuck but I am literally like you. Are you into writing? I wish we had a writing thread. Can I create it? But I'm so afraid nonnies ganna call me retarded for doing something wrong. I wish I could talk to you.
I feel like I'm cluster A. Never seen anyone discuss it but it feels more suitable for me. I wish I had the money for an actual diagnosis. Also, it's so annoying when I'm looking for a friend like me, like those weird autistic girls I can relate to, and every single time the "totally weirdo outcast autistic girls" turns out to have a boyfriend/a shit ton of friends/goes to parties every Friday.

No. 1556117

>>1555003
I get what you mean but it feels like we are seen as the bad ones solely because we are the minority. Objectively, being able to make more connections is not bad. Reminds me of that stupid study that found autists have more strong moral values and are more honest and they somehow spun it as being a bad thing.

I'm not delusional enough to autists are superior in ever way but it's frustrating that if there's an issue it's always seen as us being at fault, yet all the geniuses that people strive to be like are clear autists.

No. 1556841

>>1556117
If anything you make fewer connections than normal people, not more. You just feel entitled to expect others to read your mind during conversation because you're too dumb to explain yourself. This entitled self-absorbed behavior is the main thing everyone else hates about autistics. It's worse now because you all get coddled and told that your differences are special and wonderful when actually you're incredibly boring, annoying, and a lot of work to be around.

No. 1557509

>>1556841
No, better abilities at spotting patterns and making connections is one of the ways they test for autism. One of the things associated with Aspergers is high IQ, which goes hand in hand with making connections. NTs are just dumb and bitter about it.

>It's worse now because you all get coddled and told that your differences are special and wonderful when actually you're incredibly boring, annoying, and a lot of work to be around.

Lol because listening to NTs go on about themselves and their boring lives is soooooo interesting. Having to mask constantly so NTs don't make up some story in their head that we hate them is sooooooo easy. Being bullied wherever we go is such coddling!

No. 1559772

What do you autistic nonas think of your experiences with reducing how much you mask?
Ever since my late diagnosis I’ve decided to drop the mask more and it’s been extremely interesting. Beneficial in many ways but also exacerbates how often people find me overly aloof and intimidating. However, I’m actually more social now because I expend so little energy doing it compared to before because I don’t try to play the game of running all the mental math of how I’m supposed to appear. I just show up and do what I want more now and it feels pretty great overall. I’d say it’s benefitted my social life especially because I don’t really care about the criticisms anymore.

No. 1560097

>>1559772
Masking is tiring but at the same time I desperately want to be seen as 'normal' so it's kinda difficult. I know it's stupid but that's my life goal really, just having a normal regular family one day. And I feel like I can't do that if I ever don't mask constantly. So it's hard.

No. 1560142

>>1559772
My attempt as making is literally saying nothing. I have very limited range in conversations and honestly i don't have a lot in common with normies at all, so even if i didn't have autism, there would likely still be difficulty for me to connect with them. I also can't really help myself from rambling about shit only i care about or accidently saying something rude and offensive just because i wanted to be honest about something. At this point, my only goal is to make irl friends with 1 or 2 other autistic people who share interests with me and understand me. I have no desire to try to be normal or have a normal social life, the friends in question are people i may only interactive with once a month and i'd be fine. I am also torn. Deep down inside, i don't give a fuck about the feelings of normies, if i make them upset or uncomfortable, especially since this situations only come about because they force me to interact with them and i can't say fuck off because it would be rude. At the same time, i'd like to have a job and masking is just something you will have no choice but to do in the work place, even normies have to put on some kind of mask at work. I guess my point is that i refuse to mask in situations where it isn't vital. Outside work, i don't owe anybody shit, i don't owe them a conversation, validation or normality since they aren't paying me.

No. 1560185

>>1559772
I honestly don't really get what masking is. I guess the closest to masking I do is like >>1560142 says to just stay quiet so I don't stand out, which feels very natural for me to do anyway because I'm not very social. What do you masking nonas do to mask, how does it work?

No. 1560191

>>1560185
I do people-pleasing so I agree with whatever the person I'm talking to is saying. Also I try to figure out what this type of person would like if I said and I try to say that. So I change my masking depending on the person, I will just act either more similar to that person or more similar to someone I think they would like. If that is too difficult I just default to the agreeable person type which everyone likes on a basic level. I feel like I am acting as a character and not myself. I feel like I am looking at myself sometimes from the third person view when I do this. I also repress doing anything "weird" like stimming, saying my actual thoughts or opinions, pacing etc. I feel a lot more sick after socializing if I don't mask. I'm not sure if that is something specific to autism because most people say they find masking hard. I more find it hard if people perceive the real me.

No. 1560251

File: 1682534086725.jpeg (142.71 KB, 1080x1152, kittybabushka.jpeg)

my desk got moved to a room with a bunch of other people (previously it was me and one other coworker) and it's making me hate having ADHD even more than i already did. i am so overstimulated. people walking in, phone ringing, coworkers asking me questions–all while i'm trying to crunch numbers. i need routine to function. while i had somewhat of a notice ("we're moving you to a bigger desk next week") i literally walked into work and all my shit was in a different spot and it's so overwhelming.

i just hate that tiny changes in routines, too many things going wrong, a tag itching me will make my brain shut down. i warned all my coworkers that i would not be very eloquent or succinct for a few days until i feel 'cozy' again, but right now i just feel stupid and overwhelmed.

i got back from vacation and that's when they moved me, while also changing a lot of my job priorities because another coworker is out, so i'm just completely out of my element physically and mentally and i'm really worried i'm going to have a melt down at work. i really like my job and the people i work with, and a handful of them also have ADHD, but i don't want to accidentally be mean to anyone just because i'm overwhelmed, thanks to anyone who reads this, i feel a lot better just typing out how i feel

No. 1560649

>>1560185
>>1560142
Whenever I try to do quiet masking people think I am stuck up and treat me badly then blame me for their behavior. Let me live!

No. 1561254

File: 1682630200732.png (9.87 KB, 547x467, window.png)

Can any of you recommend any books or videos about depression / mental health / self-help? I have had chronic depression for 10 years but sometimes it gets really bad and starts to move into disassociation, then I feel like I'm losing my mind. I think I'm on the edge of that right now and want to do anything that might help me feel better. I've been working on a routine, daily exercise, healthy eating, trying to engage in hobbies but it all feels pointless and there is this bubbling sensation inside that I'm about to break down. However, sometimes simply reading self-help books makes me feel better temporarily (cos I feel calmer that it's being "addressed" and get some motivation) but most of them are terrible so looking for some good ones that have inspired you. Not strictly ND related but we are more prone to depression and I didn't know where else to ask.

No. 1561272

File: 1682632588208.jpg (17.57 KB, 254x275, m-31.jpg)

I can't tell whenever I have a crush on a girl or if I just enjoy her company because she is the only one who isn't putt off by my obvious autism. I have always struggled with being social because most people think I'm weird. I also struggle with identifying romantic feelings(not to mention I rarely fall in love because I'm so disconnected to other humans). Last time I had a crush was over 6 years ago, and even then it took my years to realize it was a crush.
Not that it matters anyway. This girl is straight so romance was never an option and I have sworn myself to the hermit lifestyle because socialising is too stressful

No. 1561723

>>1561272
You will get physical responses when around crushes. Palms sweating, heart fluttering, cheeks blushing, breathing weird etc. It depends from person to person but there will be some physical response. You don't get that with people whose company you just enjoy.

No. 1562232

Has anyone lost interest in your bf/gf after starting medication? Is it possible?

I was recently diagnosed and have been medicated for nearly two months now. I was in denial of my condition for years and suffered through life because of it. Felt like shit most days and hated how I couldn't accomplish anything. Now I'm excited to get things done, I'm working out regularly, and making plans for a better future. As I visualize this better future, it doesn't include my current boyfriend. Now I see him as more of a friend or annoying little brother than I do as a romantic partner.

I heard that meds can kill your libido, but I can masturbate, and I still get aroused by reading erotica and watching sex scenes in movies, so I don't think that's the problem here.

No. 1562234

>>1562232
*diagnosed with ADD

No. 1562902

>>1560185
When I was in hs I had no idea I was autistic but obviously I was very weird. I had an abusive bf who would often get embarrassed by my autistic mannerisms and yell at me, so I developed a method called “normalizing”, which was just masking before I knew what masking was. I would basically just not do the things I’m naturally compelled to do and copy the girls around me who seemed normal. It worked really well throughout my 20s but I basically buried everything about myself to achieve this. Now I’m 30 and idgaf anymore kek

No. 1563826

File: 1682889685068.jpg (300.94 KB, 1920x1396, wp.jpg)

Has anyone in this thread ever been to a concert and how did they feel about it? I know that no one experience autism the same but I'm still curious to hear other people's opinions. I have never been to a concert before but I'm considering going to one alone. I'm scared that the experience will be unpleasant specially since I won't have any friends with me. I'm not good with large crowds but I can cope with them if I have time to prepare myself and psych myself up for it. but I have heard that crowds at concerts can get rowdy and people drink and I hate being around drunk people in general.
This concert is coming up around at the same time as another (non-concert) event that I also really wanna go to, but I can't afford both of them so I have to chose carefully. I know what to fully expect at the other event so any opinions about concerts would be neat

No. 1563927

>>1563826
I've been to a lot of different concerts so I can say the genre of music played will affect the atmosphere a lot. Rap, metal, and more aggressive-type scenes will have rowdier crowds than indie-rock shows where people mostly stand in place. It also depends on the size of the venue, bigger venues let you spread out more so you don't have to mosh if it's not your thing.
I went to a shoegaze concert last night and the crowd was very mild mannered and polite. The best advice I can give is to do what feels best and drink a lot of water

No. 1564321

I think I'm starting to realize I have undiagnosed autism on top of being neglected as a child. It's becoming more obvious when I come home from work and my social masking pretty much is going away when I'm around my boyfriend. He mentioned how soft my voice was the other day, I kept blaming a fan, but it's never been that quiet before so it was harder for him to understand me. I, myself, have started to notice the patterns of how I talk to him are almost like broken English: short phrases, baby-like speak. Also, I'm recognizing I have like 6 total moods and it's difficult for me to express myself more, so I tend to default to crying when I have a rush of emotions.

No. 1564383

>>1563826
Going to concerts is one of my hobbies! I go whenever I can and I’d go even more if I felt comfortable going by myself. I have so much fun, it’s a huge rush of endorphins and I feel like I’m floating. I stim via dancing also so I dance or head bang like crazy and it’s a great release! Definitely not for everyone with autism but for me it’s one of the best things in life.

No. 1564456

>>1563826
I went to a few in my teen years due to peer pressure. Some of the smaller ones for indie pop bands or something mild are OK but still a bit of a sensory nightmare sometimes - you're very close to other people, the air is very warm and the music is very loud. The huge concerts and festivals are a no-go for me personally because they'rejust too large and overwhelming. The one I went to - I had a meltdown and lost my friends I was getting a lift home with (and my shoes, somehow kek) so that wasn't a good experience at all. But the ones where you are seated in a stadium away from the crowds are probably OK. Like going to the theatre, I guess.
Bring ear plugs, stay near the exit and I'm sure you'll be fine. You can always leave if it's too much!

No. 1565845

>>1563826
Most concerts I've been to have been sit down concerts with assigned seats and they're a lot easier to deal with. Just find your seat, enjoy the music and then leave kek

No. 1565849

>>1564321
You might have undiagnosed autism as much as the next stranger, but none of the things you listed are that indicative of it. I mean baby-like talk around your bf, really? You should sort out all of your issues stemming from child neglect and see how many autistic traits are left after that.

No. 1566414

>>1565849
according to this thread no one ever has ever been autistic

No. 1566704

>>1566414
Clearly not right since you're in the autism thread where people discuss their autism all the time. Sorry you feel personally attacked over someone not thinking a person traumatized from neglect growing up to show signs of trauma is a sign of autism rather than from the result of said trauma.

No. 1566768

Has anyone else asked for accommodations at work? I have a union protected job but haven't disclosed my autism to anyone. How has that process worked for you if you have?

No. 1566871

>>1566704
>Sorry you feel personally attacked
I don't? I've just noticed that every time someone asks if they could be autistic, they are told they are not. Every time someone speaks about autism on social media, they are deemed to be faking. Every time someone talks about their experiences (diagnosed or not), they are told they are not autistic.

No. 1566910

>>1566871
>Every time someone talks about their experiences (diagnosed or not), they are told they are not autistic.
Nona you are literally in the autism thread where people discuss their autism and give each other advice, you can just scroll up and read it, what are you on about?
the only time I see people getting fake claimed is for people like pixielocks where it is pretty obvious she is faking disorders for attention online

No. 1566917

>>1566768
I told my boss shortly after getting hired and it has helped me a lot. I get to work shorter hours and I get time off for autism-related doctors/therapy meetings without any questions asked, I get the most secluded desk because I require peaceful environments to focus and they require less of me in general. If I do something weird they know why and won't judge me to harshly. I can tell the difference between before and after a new colleague finds out, before they find me stand offish because I don't talk much but after they know they suddenly talk to me and are keen to help. I think some of it is slightly infantalizing but they're being nice so I honestly don't mind kek

No. 1566961

File: 1683134797414.jpg (21.33 KB, 400x243, IMG_20191209_093804.jpg)

Do any nonnies here struggle with having conversations and meeting friends? It never seems like autistic people around me have trouble doing this and I feel very lonely, like none of them have experienced how overwhelming maintaining a friendship is or how impossible it seems to have a conversation with someone that lasts more than a few minutes. All I ever hear is other autists talking about struggling with social faux paus but I can't even get that far with connecting to another person to begin with, in the rare times I manage to talk to someone for more than a few exchanges it becomes unbearably stressful to keep up with, and it's very rare people don't just ghost me or forget I exist in a group setting because I have such a hard time talking and making connections with others. I just feel really depressed about it, like not even other autists are on this level.

No. 1566995

>>1566871
Ive found the opposite to be true. Is this the only part of the internet you hang out? Check out TikTok or Reddit where it’s highly encouraged to self-diagnose, people actually fear-monger against getting actual diagnoses, and every single thing a person does is a sign of autism.

No. 1567006

>>1566961
I’m the same nona. It’s an extremely lonely life and I get jealous of the other autistic women I know who are like 90% normie, have active social lives and close besties they post all the time. It makes me sick kek. I have had an embarrassing amount of failed potential friendships bc I was too autistic and rarely click with anyone. I’m so lonely that I’m considering hitting up my ex best friend from junior high whom I haven’t seen since high school graduation (10 years ago). You’re not alone!

No. 1567044

>>1567006
Are you me? It's awful nonna, I'm sorry you have to deal with it too. I've tried the advice of making friends with other autistic women, but even those kinds of relationships are just too much… and the failed friendships give me so much regret. I wish there was a way we could just stop feeling loneliness, kek.

No. 1567201

>>1566917
did you have to fill out a lot of paper work to HR? that's the part I'm dreading

No. 1567219

>>1566917
Nta but I admire your courage anon. I would never. I remember just mentioning to my manager that I might be on the spectrum, just to test the waters, and she said something like
>but you aren't, RIGHT?
and then she said that as long as she can't tell someone has a disorder or an illness she doesn't care. So I think that if she knew my behavior is tied to my disorder and it can't be changed, she wouldn't be so happy with me. Right now she still hopes I will somehow change and be more outgoing, like my coworkers kek. I can't afford to change my job for now

No. 1567254

>>1566871
I completely disagree, i just think the anons here want people to keep their options open.
>>1566917
I've pondered doing this myself. I feel like i'd either get judgement or they would feel confused as to what to do with the information.
>>1566961
Idk how so many autistic people are able to have children and live relatively normal lives. I haven't had irl friends since my early teens and at this point i am completely numb. I feel living this way actually stifles my ability to communicate in general and it's a terrible thing. However, i've never met a single person irl i can be honest with or feel confident being myself with. I've ever made a meaningful connection with anybody in my life.

No. 1567285

>>1566961
I do struggle with those things but am mostly ok with it. The only time I "socialise" is when I see my parents or have a work meeting. And every now and then through activity-based things like exercising or hobby groups. I have 2 friends who live in different countries now and see once every couple of years, which is very stressful when it happens but otherwise they're OK with the odd text or email here and there. They're the only people I've managed to keep in my life long term and they're barely in my life at all. I've had countless failed friendships for the reasons you mentioned.
For me I think there is a lot of avoidance issues related to it too. As much as I love the idea of a close friendship - the reality of it whenever I come close is too much for me to deal with. It always feels so unnatural and uncomfortable. Plus, I just need so much time to decompress after even short conversations with people and sometimes I need longer periods to shut myself off from the world. I mostly dread the thought of spending time with people i genuinely really like because of the stresses of socialising. It's my own fault. Even if I make a connection I can't maintain it.
I think I just got over the feelings of loneliness after a while as a coping mechanism. But I enjoy my time alone a lot more now and just accept how I am.

No. 1567288

>>1567285
samefag to say that adopting my cat helped a lot too. she is great company. my best pal.

No. 1567491

>>1567201
No, but that's not a common thing in my country. I didn't have to fill out anything at all, my boss did all the paperwork because they get compensated/supported by the state for hiring a disabled person.

No. 1567498

>>1567254
>I completely disagree, i just think the anons here want people to keep their options open.
I agree with this. People online are already self-diagnosing way too much with things they clearly do not have (not just autism). Some conditions don't even exist yet they spread through social contagion (people thinking they're physically nonbinary and no one can tell their real sex, or a vampire who needs blood to not die, that they are mentally an animal and so on) It can be harmful for an individual to be convinced they have a disorder or condition they don't actually have. Especially in cases such as the most recent in this thread where the person in question has a known trauma cause is it unwise to assume it's something other than the trauma.

Autism is not a badge of honour, it's not a good thing to have, it's not an explanation for your odd behaviours, it's not an identity. There are a hundred other things that could "look" like autism that would get untreated or mistreated if you were to wrongly assume the cause was autism.

No. 1567502

>>1566961
I have 2 local friends and I still struggle to keep up with them. I find it easier to keep up with online friends because I can come and go as a I please, I can reply an hour later and that's accepted. The ideal is an online friend group that meet up 1-2 times a month so we get to hang out but I'm not expected to see them too often.

I feel like I was made to be something like a travelling hunter in medieval times, leaving the village to go hunt alone or with a partner for a week and then come back to socialize for a bit selling the meat I got from the hunt before leaving again. I wasn't made to live in a town with strict social rules, I was made to roam freely on my own.

No. 1567505

>I just need so much time to decompress after even short conversations with people and sometimes I need longer periods to shut myself off from the world
It gets easier to keep up with friends as you age! Normies (or perhaps just extroverts) find it to be the opposite since they're no longer kids who can hang out every day or weekend, I on the other hand find it's so much easier to maintain healthy friendships when people expect that everyone else is busy with their own family most of the time. It's now natural that you can't see someone for a month or 2, because they've got kids to take care of or work. And if you have social media and you can just go in and like the photo they posted so you're still in touch with them even when not talking.

No. 1567582

>>1567505
>It gets easier to keep up with friends as you age
ayrt sorry to be blackpilled but I'm in my mid 30s now and find it only gets more difficult. I have less and less energy. the only thing I will say is, like you've eluded to, being friends with more mature people will mean they are likely to have less time themselves and more understanding if you don't text/email/whatever back right away.
but in terms of tolerance and desire to keep up with friends, mine has plummeted as I age. the upside of that is I care much much less kek. I've heard this from a few women now… post-30s you tend to give less of a shit about things in general.

No. 1568055

>>1566871
but why do anons feel the need to announce in this thread in particular? I like this thread because I get to share my experiences with being an autistic woman and I get to read other women's experiences. I hate when it gets clogged up with "I think I have autism". I'm also genuinely curious what's the goal of the anons who makes post like that? If they need to vent about their undiagnosed disorder then go to the vent or confession thread. If they are looking for advice with how to deal with a symptom then go to the advice thread in /g. Maybe someone should make a "I think I have autism" thread so people can discuss symptoms? but I don't see the point in that. An autism diagnosis requires someone to hear your life story, observe how you talk and your mannerism. It's not something a few anonymous people on an imageboard can do.
I got my diagnosis late so I do sympathises with these people but there is a time and place for everything and I don't want this thread to turn into a suspected autism thread instead of an autism thread.
I think the least you can do if you suspect you have autism and want to use this thread then just vent about the behavior that could be an autism symptom, don't announce that you are not diagnosed it's uneeded.
Also as >>1566995 said tiktok, reddit, tumblr and twitter has big communities for self diagnosed autists so there do exist placea where people can discuss their suspected autism

No. 1569448

>>1566871
t. offended zoomer faking autism mad at being called out

No. 1569779

Question for fellow autists: Have you ever had your handwriting be described as masculine/unfeminine? (And if so, would you provide an example?)

No. 1570041

>>1569779
I don't think my handwriting is necessarily feminine or masculine, it is unreadable chicken scratch though lol

No. 1570082

>>1569779
Yes but that's because "feminine" writing is readable and mine is parkinson's tier

No. 1570091

>>1569779
I regularly have my handwriting mistaken for a guy's unfortunately. Once I found a reddit scrote with the exact same handwriting as me, which was extremely weird

No. 1570127

I've tried several medications for ADD so far, but none work. The moment the dose starts being at a level it does something for me, it instantly becomes useless because I also become extremely anxious and jittery. But at the same time I seem to be increasingly unable to function day to day.
I honestly want to cry, I just want to be able to sit down and do what I need to do, even if just every other day. But apparently that's too much to ask of my retarded brain.

No. 1570282

>>1570127
Which have you tried, and at what levels?

Also, are you doing other things to try either to improve executive function/ability to "turn on" focus, or to create workarounds for yourself (reminders, rewards, routines, reflection, etc.)?

Last Qs - is anxiety an issue generally and are you addressing that at all? If you have some existing (even latent) anxiety, the keying-up from the stim may be augmenting what already exists - so if that is managed or reduced, then perhaps the stim effect won't be enough to raise it to untolerable levels.

Also - and it's kind of a hack that assumes the meds do help you in some ways and to the degree that you'd want to avail yourself of the benefits but for the jitters/anxiety; if they don't have much positive effect for you then ignore - sometimes doing some kind of exercise (whatever for you gets you feeling it) not long after taking a med /before or as it starts to act. It elevates mood and gets your mind and body engaged not purely based on medication but also organically. Exercise is also often an effective way to blow up tension/anxious feelings in a day. On stim meds I can get hyper focused and sit in one body- cramping position for 16 hours (very occasional bio breaks) and I don't like to switch gears - I'm both intense and intensely lazy at times - but I always feel far better when I balance out the "get shit done" stuff with at least some movement. When I remember and/or am not intent on self-sabotage, anyway. The breaks also, contrary to what I expect in the moment, keep me on task because instead of going down rabbitholes, etc., the break gives me a chance to remember my purpose/goal.

No. 1570359

>>1570282
Ritalin, vyvanse and Atomoxetine. But you're right that I've always been anxious and nobody ever seems to really want to address that part.
Sorry for a bit of a vent but I'm at that point where, because I have both ADD and autism, I get send back and forth because one specialist will say it's the autism, the other will say it's the ADD.
But thanks for the tips, I think I'll bring it up with my psychologist next time I see them.

No. 1570426

>>1570359
I wish you luck! Don't be afraid to advocate for yourself. It is your right, and it can be done respectfully and productively. I once had a minor battle/debate with my prescribing psych over something I wanted to try, discussion of current-state medical literature included. It was a little uncomfortable (he's the expert, etc.), and I didn't even press that hard…but I won (lol), and what I proposed works pretty well for me (better than the prior approach, anyway). It can be useful sometimes to challenge when you're handed a standard solution that doesn't work, or at least to press a little when you're given the brush off. A lot of prescribers take the usual path and don't like to take on insurers, but it's your life, not theirs. (I'm not advocating demanding x or being unhelpfully combative, but you deserve to be able to ask questions and probe the answers.)

You might also want to ask/push for your two providers (you mentioned you see someone for ADD and another for autism) to actually talk together and coordinate an approach. I don't know why that's not more commonly done (I get it's not the culture and idk if there's a consultation code that would get them paid by insurance [should be]…but imo, as professionals they should be proactive, and I don't think they're practicing as they should if they don't even think about looking a little deeper and more broadly, but I digress).

No. 1570445

I feel doomed to always and only have moid friends. I started a new job a couple months ago and so far the only people I end up talking to and hanging out with are men. It's just difficult to find girls who want to discuss philosophy or unironically debate political topics or just know any of the youtube/video game/internet stuff I mention. I started off strictly speaking to girls but they tend to kind of wander away from me after a bit and I can't form connection with them. In fact, I even made the moid friends because they overheard me talking to a girl about Dark Souls speedrunning.I don't want moid friends for obvious reasons but especially because they always end up catching feelings. I also don't want to pretend to be someone I'm not to connect with women but also the problem is clearly with me, so… Of the top 10 people I chat with at work, only 1 of them is a woman.

No. 1570463

>>1570445
i can't say its the same for me, mostly because i avoid men who try to talk to me unless i'm forced to be in a male dominated environment, i guess. i have similar interests that you do, and the way i typically make female friends is by talking about cute things or animals. Sometimes music and art works too, or even just talking about the type of foods that you like. I don't know about you, but I feel like my feminine and masculine interests are 50/50 so I can usually find someone. I think, what, statistically women play video games more than men because a lot are into puzzles and platformers? The moms who play candy crush demographic is huge. Safest topics are Kirby, Animal Crossing, and sometimes Pokemon. Everyone is a weeb these days so it's less cringe to talk openly about that as long as you don't get too niche.

No. 1570509

>>1569779
Mine's all-caps, it isn't very elegant. I've found using a caligraphy pen helps.

No. 1570638

>>1570445
don't make friends at work.

No. 1571035

>>1570638
nta but why not?

No. 1571312

>>1569779
I have been feeling very insecure about my handwriting lately and have considered to upload pictures of it in this thread so anons can judge whenever it looks autistic or not No one has described it as masculine or anything but it has been called ugly and messy. I have always used connected writing(I have always been a slow learner but connected writing was the only thing I learned fast kek) so it was a good way to hide my messy-ness. But whenever I don't use connected writing my handwriting looks very childish specially when I have to write in all capital letters then my handwriting looks identical to a 10 year old boy's. I did have some girls judge me for my handwriting growing up while boys never commented on it

No. 1571354

Anons idk if I have adhd or autism a little bit. Should I seek a diagnosis? Its not that I really suffer, I would just like to understand myself more. Do I need to ask my family doctor? (I’m not a burger)

No. 1571478

File: 1683578654801.png (58.86 KB, 726x922, groomer behavior.png)

fucked up the screenshot rip but anyways whenever I think r/adhd can't get any worse, it does

No. 1572768

>>1571354
If you don't suffer from it,then you don't need to seek out for a official diagnosis, these are only to get especial arrangements, I think.

No. 1572856

File: 1683694486002.jpeg (211.38 KB, 1052x1358, D4BAD843-E78F-4E7D-996A-42CB06…)

>>1569779
Yes my handwriting has been described as boyish. My partner told me a page handwritten by looks like a collaborative effort. Here’s a standardized test essay I wrote in high school that I later found being used as a rubric/example of a perfect scoring essay and why exactly it scored perfectly. I was honestly surprised it scored so well because I was the first one finished in class and thought I bombed it. Looked up how to actually spell paparazzi when I got home and was kicking myself over it (we were given a couple random previously unknown prompts to choose from and had 40 minutes to write an essay in the formulaic way we’d been taught to write essays).

No. 1572901

File: 1683699779142.gif (88.88 KB, 240x240, cec7098b605ce3f01963e995f896fb…)

>>1572856
Congrats, nonna! It's awesome you did such a good job on the test that you are used as a sample of top-tier work. I am no writing expert but I don't feel like your writing is inherently masculine or feminine. It's very neutral IMO, and this is coming from someone that grades semester classes. I don't know how to describe it well, but if your writing was more masculine, I'd say it would have more jagged strokes and bold lines, and be a little bigger. In the exams I've graded, male students can be really illegible because they go too fast and too powerful; female speed writers go smaller but their writing is more uniform. If your writing was more feminine, I think you'd make your rouder letters even more round (your a's and b's are pretty feminine though), and you'd give longer or more swoopy tails to y's, g's, and q's. Your w's are really cute, too. Honestly if I graded your work I'd be so happy because it's like and legible, even if it is a tad small and some letters can be mistaken for others (particularly, your e's can get a little too fast and some n's skew a little into r territory. R's in general suffer from speed and oversimplification, but don't sweat it, nonabella).
I hope this helps? I wrote like a novel, and I'm not even remotely qualified to analyze handwriting. Sorry, tl;dr I like your handwriting and that it's not exactly too masculine or too feminine.

No. 1572968

>>1571354
>Should I seek a diagnosis?
>Its not that I really suffer, I would just like to understand myself more.
Hard no on that. A diagnosis isn't a little note for "finding your true inner self" like social media would have you think. It's strictly medical to allow you access to the medical care/accommodations needed for you to function in daily life. There is no reason to seek a diagnosis if you don't need it. It's just a disability marker.
I promise you also won't understand yourself better at all. The reason people say they finally understand themselves after getting diagnosed is typically because they had no idea why they were acting the way they did their whole lives, and then one day a therapist is like "actually, I think it may be because you're autistic" and people are like "holy shit I didn't even know that was a thing". You're already aware of whatever symptom you think you have, and you don't suffer from it, so you won't gain anything new this way.

Many countries can deny you residency based on having an autism diagnosis, so if you ever have to/want to move you may not be able to because they'll kick you out. If you ever have legal trouble they could potentially discredit you due to your mental disability. Say an abusive ex spouse wants to take your children as revenge on you, he could easily claim you're an unfit mother due to your mental adhd/autism struggles. Even if you don't want kids yourself, what if they're your niece or nephew and you're their last hope to escape abuse? There are many risks like this that aren't brought up very often but they are very real. Getting a diagnosis you don't even need could fuck you over big time.

And then of course another reason is that many people do suffer from their adhd/autism/whatnot, but competent professionals who can help and diagnose them are limited. So you'll be taking up time and resources that people who are suffering then don't get because you took it despite knowing you aren't even suffering.

I would again stress that every autist and adhd person is different, so you won't learn anything about yourself from getting a diagnosis even if you do have adhd/autism. To learn more about yourself general therapy can help, but most of all just living in the real world helps. I've seen countless fakers/wannabes (not saying you are nona! just as an example) who fall into the label trap, they start exaggerating their (real or fake) symptoms and develop new ones to fit into the label of adhd/autism/other disorder. It becomes their identity. That is stupid and only limits you from being your "true" self. If you run into a problem, let's say time management is an issue, then look into how to better handle this one issue at hand. Rather than going "I struggle because of adhd, guess it can't be helped" you can instead look for solutions on how to solve it. Perhaps someone with adhd has the perfect strategy to help, perhaps a neurotypical has it, or maybe your unique own method works best.

You understand yourself through experiences in the real world, you don't get it from a medical note with a list of symptoms.

No. 1572971

Do any other nonas here have a history of school refusal? I missed 80% of my education after age 11 because I really struggled with transitions and the chaos of the school environment in general. I’m now trying to catch up by myself but it’s really difficult.

No. 1572974

File: 1683710144579.jpeg (7.43 KB, 178x284, lonelycastle.jpeg)

>>1572971
Same nona. I was the same age as you when I stopped attending regular education. Still trying to make up for all the damage that's been done, it feels impossible to make up for all that lost time.

The YN novel Lonely Castle in the Mirror deals with this subject. I recommend it for that reason alone.

No. 1572975

>>1572968
yeah i honestly think i'm on the spectrum but i don't wanna get an official diagnosis bc i'm scared it'll be thrown in my face, i'm done with being offered friendship out of pity and that's gonna get worse with a proper diagnosis, the oppression olympics only works on the internet

ive seen way too many examples of people with even the smallest disability moved down the list for bonuses, promotions, etc at work too. one of my colleagues has limited mobility and i overheard my boss go "yeah we'll just give [employee] the grunt work, let the senior offices go to people who can walk up to them" before he howled like that was the funniest shit on earth

No. 1572979

>>1572971
Yes, but I was still a smart nerd so I passed all the tests and they couldn't hold me back despite missing a lot of school time. The work wasn't hard, it was just physically going to school and having the environment be an unpredictable mess there that made me suffer.

No. 1572999

>>1572971
i pretty much almost got kicked out of 11th grade because going to school made me suicidal from the anxiety

No. 1573028

>>1572974
Thank you for the recommendation. I’m 19 and feel very alone and ashamed because I did not attend for years at a time and don’t know anyone else who missed so much school. I was practically a NEET growing up. I went to a special school for some time when I was 14 and that was the last time I ever went. I don’t have a diagnosis so sorry for posting here but growing up psychiatrists kept on telling me I’m probably autistic and I was supposed to go for an assessment at age 14 but I didn’t go because I was embarrassed. I have an exam this month but I struggle to study.
>>1572979
I got very bad depression and anxiety due to school refusal and how I was treated for it so I did nothing for years. I was personally blamed for it and ridiculed by everyone even though I could not physically leave my room. Maybe this is dramatic but I think it traumatised me a little. I try not to blame myself today because I know I was just a child and it wasn’t my fault.
>>1572999
It’s so horrible how schools punish you for something you can’t control. I was constantly sent to an isolated room with no windows. They did everything they could to strip away any control I could feel over myself. My parents were going to be fined a lot of money for my school refusal so I stabbed myself so that there would be a medical excuse/reason not to go to school.

No. 1573034

>>1572971
I left school at 14 because I couldn't deal with the bullying anymore lol it got so bad that both classmates and teachers alike where involved and the only mechanism of defence I had was freeze so I got pulled off.
I was really sad because I liked school and I was a top tier student when I was younger, but my grades started going downhill because I couldn't understand absolutely nothing they were teaching, and when teachers came to explain to me individually they would often tell me I was distracted and that I wasn't paying attention even if I was giving everything I had.
The only thing I was good at was English.

No. 1573268

>>1573028
>I stabbed myself so that there would be a medical excuse/reason not to go to school.
I've also self-harmed just to get have a "valid reason" out of school. Insane that they push us this far, and insane that we do it.

No. 1573330

Blog incoming but I really need to vent right now.
Everywhere I go, anything I do (school, university, internships, jobs, courses, etc.) I’m being told that there’s clearly something wrong with me that I need to get fixed. One supervisor in university told me that I was an excellent student but really needed to see a psychologist to “get this sorted out [gestures vaguely at my head]” if I ever wanted to get a job in the field. MH professionals just threw SSRI’s at me for ten years (and got annoyed with me when that didn’t magically turn me normal) until I was diagnosed with Asperger’s shortly after turning twenty. It made a lot of sense, and I was able to sit in on some mildly helpful support groups for a few months. The diagnosis didn’t fix anything but at least it felt like things might get better and hopefully I would be able to find my place in the world.
But then Asperger’s stopped being a thing. Instead, everything was one big autism spectrum, and I’m on the “privileged” end of the spectrum. Because I can live independently and have managed to scrape together a STEM degree I’m not considered disabled enough to qualify for anything, and if I seek support I’m shamed for trying to take resources away from people who need them more. But nobody outside of the mental health field seems to have gotten that memo. I’m still essentially being told that I’m too autistic to be employable and that I need to seek help with [gestures wildly] before I can be accepted as a functional member of society. Even the accommodations I’d need at work are in this weird limbo where they’re too minor to really count towards the HR disability/diversity quota but too annoying for any employer to want to bother with them, so they don’t.
Literally just a quiet place to work. That’s it. That’s all I need. Put me in an unused broom closet or whatever and I’m happy. I’ll have my lunch breaks in there too. Nobody has to deal with my weirdness and I’ll be extra productive. Everybody wins! Why is this so hard

No. 1573938

>>1573330
>But then Asperger’s stopped being a thing. Instead, everything was one big autism spectrum, and I’m on the “privileged” end of the spectrum.
Remember that aspergers IS still a thing, it's just not in the DSM5 anymore but other diagnostic systems still use them and give the diagnosis out. It's absolutely retarded that they expect a group of disabled people (who don't like change as part of their condition) to change what words they use to describe their own disability. I will never stop calling it aspergers, that's literally what is on my diagnostic papers.

Depending on where you live if you can get people to admit that they don't want you because of how you act because of your disability even though you qualify for the job you may be able to sue them or something, because that's generally illegal in most places.

No. 1575687

File: 1683933085411.jpg (68.05 KB, 539x561, 0_original.jpg)

>>1439814
youʼve discovered that the world built around you has walls. join the others who have climbed theirs, come enjoy the view

No. 1577716

not only did I embarrassed myself today I also put someone else in an embarrassing (and maybe violating) situation. this is why I never go outside to any social events without my friend. I need her to tell me what is considered social acceptable. I feel so awful and guilty and humiliated

No. 1577892

Anons, i really want to be able to have a job where i can actually sustain myself and not be a homeless neet. I straight up don't even have the option to be a neet, my parents don't take my diagnoses seriously and are still hoping i will turn out to be a normie even though i am in my late 20s. I am really frustrated by not having anyone irl to support me and help me navigate what jobs i can actually get hired in and keep for as long as possible. I am still kind of mourning the life I thought i could live prior to my diagnoses too. I also hoped i would become a normie and all my anxiety, awkwardness and overall shortcomings would resolve. It's also so much harder than i thought to get a specialist for autistic adults. My social skills are not good enough, i am frustrated about coming off constantly as flat and missing my cues to fake a smile or provide an appropriate reaction so people don't think i am rude. I wish i knew what it was like to understand human interaction, to have the natural instinct to be animated, full of life and sociable.

No. 1577972

>>1575687
What does this even mean? Ntayrt but "autistic content" is some of the most embarrassing crap out there.

No. 1578128

>>1573938
I still call it Asperger’s when I’m talking to anyone who’s unlikely to be knowledgeable on the issue, because most older people I meet still think autism = severe intellectual disability. Many people seem to get their frame of reference from the media and I’d rather have a prospective employer think of me as Sheldon Cooper than Rain Man.

Unfortunately it seems to be very difficult to get anyone, including HR, to care about this kind of discrimination. Employers can reject anyone for “not fitting in” without having to explain what they mean by that. Workplace cohesion is important, after all. My last employer chose not to renew my contract for that reason, and because I “seemed unhappy”. The coworkers who bullied me like a bunch of middle schoolers got to stay, of course. They did fit in and did not seem unhappy.
Even when colleagues and fellow students have been openly hostile to autism in general (e.g. using it as an insult, mocking stereotypical autistic behaviour) they got away with it because either I hadn’t disclosed my diagnosis to every single person I worked with (was I supposed to wear a tag?) or in one case because “isn’t everyone a little bit autistic nowadays?”. Apparently it’s fine to mock others for traits you have yourself, even if you don’t actually have those traits yourself. Once again I’m disabled enough to be discriminated against but not disabled enough to deserve protection from discrimination. I just wish people would pick a side.

No. 1578157

>>1571478
>my dream job as an online sex worker
this is fake

No. 1578512

Does anyone else constantly have people laughing at them when they say something that wasn't meant to be funny? Or they just get "the stare" like they spoke a foreign language so you keep rephrasing yourself trying to get it "right" while they stare expressionless? Is it a tension defusing technique or is my tone or wording so fucked up all people can do is laugh? Being misunderstood is a huge issue for me in general. I feel like if I don't phrase things super literally people will always take things the wrong way. Also like I said earlier about the blanking response- this in a way is worse. My mom did it to me when we were at a family dinner and embarrassed me like a month ago. She asked me a question I responded and then she just stared at me blankly and silently until I got anxious and rephrased myself several times and she finally "came back to reality" and engaged with me. Is this like a tactic normal people use to punish me for being "too autistic" or not giving the "right" response? It's agonizing when I get that blank face. It reminds me of the psych experiment when the mothers just give their baby a blank face and won't react to their bids for attention until the baby freaks the fuck out because the baby's getting 0 mirroring and feels alone

No. 1578953

>>1578512
>Does anyone else constantly have people laughing at them when they say something that wasn't meant to be funny?
Happens frequently and I just embrace people thinking I'm funny, if anything it makes people like me more kek
But I do try to take note of all the things I say that get the "wrong" reaction and contemplate why without judging myself too harshly for not getting it right. For example when I was new at my job I accidentally gave my boss an order once, although I didn't intend to and in my mind I was just being supportive like I would be with a friend.

>I feel like if I don't phrase things super literally people will always take things the wrong way.

Do you have examples of this? I find that one of my autist friends was always over explaining to the point of confusion rather than it making it clearer. (Of course normies like to put in "hidden meaning" you didn't intend though, that's really annoying when you're like me and literally only meant exactly what you said.) The way my friend did it made things worse and less clear because every sentence he used was an information-dump. For example let's say he wanted to ask "Could you turn on the kettle?" he would say it more like "Could you take the black colored kettle that is on the back end of the counter top in the kitchen and fill it up halfway with water from the kitchen tap and then put it back on the boiling plate that it was standing on and press the little button at the bottom on it to turn it on so the water boils?". In the end it made me feel both overwhelmed with information and like he was over-explaining to me because he though I was too stupid to know how to do it or unable to figure it out on my own and I think other people had the same reaction. Of course people being confused at what he said only made him MORE adamant that he had to over-explain things because people kept taking what he said wrong. Not saying this is what you're doing, but it could be worth thinking about.

>Is this like a tactic normal people use to punish me for being "too autistic" or not giving the "right" response?

Is it possible if your family does this that they're autists too and don't know how to respond? Autism is nearly always hereditary. Maybe they're not silent because you said the "wrong" thing and you're repeating yourself and feeling anxious for no reason. I know a few people, both normies and autists, who are silent when they think. It appears as if they won't respond but eventually they do. But either way, it sounds a bit to me like maybe you're a bit overly dependant on others validation and attention. It shouldn't make you that level of anxious if someone goes silent for a bit. She asked a question, you replied. Doesn't seem like you had any reason to feel embarrassed. Why does the blank face bother you? You already gave your answer, if they want something clarified it's on them to ask for it. You aren't a baby, you don't need constant attention from your mom. Be more confident nona!

No. 1579079

>>1570445
me too, I guess in a way too female friendships seem way more important to me, so if they show signs of not liking me/talking about me behind my back it sends me spiraling. at least with men 99% of the time you know what you're getting up front

No. 1579517

>>1578512
Yes anon, all the time, and the stare part is so true. However if they do the same to you, no one notices or cares. The worst is when they do the stare and ignore everything that you just said and change the subject. It isn't even stuff that makes them uncomfortable, they just don't understand and don't ask for clarification.

No. 1579691

File: 1684287107513.gif (2.09 MB, 320x287, 07D75EB7-3737-45EE-A95B-B768FD…)

I seriously hate when one of my cousins tells everyone that anecdote of the 4 of us (two male cousins and my brother) on a road trip with my parents.
He’s always laughing and mocking me because during that trip (a 6 hours trip, all of us cramped in one car) I was vocally stimming because breathing was already annoying to them.
I would do that unconsciously, I still do it unconsciously, just like when I’m rocking myself or constantly moving, like I literally can’t help it, people are always telling me that it’s annoying but I can’t control it and at this point I don’t even want to know how to do so.
So when I was a kid, like 7 or 8 years old, I was getting mocked by my cousins and my brother because I would carry toys around, so I, of course, wasn’t allowed to have them on the seat with me.
I was then doing like different animals like meowing and such, it’s annoying, I know, but fuck, I just couldn’t stop doing that.
The started telling to “shut the fuck up” and that I was being “damn annoying” so I ended up crying because I didn’t know what to do, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t distract myself with anything, I had nothing to talk about because I was also told that I was fucking stupid all of the time.
Which I’m still constantly told that I’m stupid but whatever, I try to not think about it too much.
Though it still makes me want to kill myself, because since then I would always think of going outside in a car as something annoying or bad and all I would want to do was opening the door of the car and just let myself go. I seriously hated going to visit my dad’s side of the family because it was the same issue all of the time.
But it’s okay, everyone, it’s just a funny thing, they really got me there I guess, they made me shut up by telling me to shut the fuck up so that’s very funny and hilarious, my cousin makes sure to tell everyone he sees around me so he can laugh with everyone, it’s just so much fun.

No. 1579778

>>1570445
It's just the nature of females. I gave up on IRL relationships with girls in elementary. At best, you will always have shallow friendships with them that deal in the cutesy (animal crossing, outfits), mundane (venting about their boyfriends/husbands), and maybe comradery about shit moid behavior and this over-arcing girl/womanhood we all share at some basic level (along the lines of Anrdea Dworkin). It's not bad, but it's hollow and enough of it with no substitute will leave you empty. If you want to discuss politics, religion, science, etc. you have to find a specialized group or class in which 1 in 35 might be a woman, and no guarantee you have shit in common or that she even desires a friendship. Everything will be online. There's a reason 4chan gravitates towards woman hating. Most don't have any distinct personality other that plumping their lips with gloss and waving their crusty long nails while pinching "YASSS QWEEN."

inb4 I'm "not like other girls" sperging. there are genuinely outlier women in the world who can't relate to others. Get over yourself.

No. 1579846

> If you want to discuss politics, religion, science, etc. you have to find a specialized group or class in which 1 in 35 might be a woman.

My take on the reasoning behind this is that girls and women are socialized to be passive and have a "collective" mindset.

A guy saying what he has on his mind is seen as being confident and masculine, if a girl did that she'd be seen as rude and bitchy (ESPECIALLY when we're talking about something like politics and religion). Look at female TV characters like the "nagging wife" who are portrayed negatively for saying what's on their mind.

Non-autistic women are more prone to have a "don't want to kill the mood" mentality.

No. 1579865

>>1579778
Why don't you head on back to 4chan then, sounds like you'd fit in a lot better there than here

No. 1579891

>>1579778
Just because you're stuck in an elementary level of understanding female friendships doesn't mean other girls and women are. The true reason you don't have female friends is because you lack social skills, you come off as incredibly immature and unpleasant to be around.

No. 1579902

>>1579778
You are the one who should get over youraelf.

No. 1579903

>>1579778
The reactions you got were so predictable. For most women, social death is worse than real death.

No. 1579908

File: 1684316322150.png (21.67 KB, 1064x254, social isolation.png)

>>1579903
If you look at studies it's the opposite though, women fear death and violence and men fear being laughed at and being seen as weak.

In general humans are social pack animals, being lonely does actual physical damage to your body and brain.

No. 1579919

>>1579908
Oh come on. The fact that all humans are social animals doesn't change that women are more conformist than men, women exclude each other for petty reasons, women care more about social rules, women are easier to influence via social shame, women care more about being in the in-group. There's no special insult for men who dare to display individuality.

No. 1579927

>>1579919
Then make one? Lol

No. 1579932

>>1579927
My point was if people considered men expressing individuality to be a cardinal sin like they do in women, there would be one.

No. 1579941

>>1579932
>if people considered men expressing individuality to be a cardinal sin like they do in women
Have you seen how 99% of the world treats feminine men?

No. 1579951

>>1579932
I disagree, men are a lot more conformist and they're unwilling to step out of line to express themselves in any way even in societies where they're relatively safe in doing so. Most men wouldn't even dream of doing something as scandalous as standing out by wearing red jeans. They even find it embarrassing to have the wrong brand of car.
>>1579919
>There's no special insult for men who dare to display individuality.
Yes there is, they're galled "gay, faggot, poof" etc and then get violently beaten up.

No. 1580015

I consider retarded to go full
>muh wahmens aren’t as deep as intellecktuall as I am
Because in the end you’re generalizing like how people generalize having autism, race, nationalities and so on.
Maybe instead of saying
>It's just the nature of females.
Say that you just haven’t been lucky finding women that align with your ideals, like it’s idiotic to assume that just because you’re yourself, that you will somehow attract people that are exactly into the same things you are into or that you will naturally find people to talk with and befriend.
Do you all even know the number of people that exists? Do you even travel? >inb4 no money. Whatever. Just going to another city may surprise you and let you meet new people that you can connect with, if you want to connect with them.
I’m an absolute autist with shit taste and I still somehow manage to find people that want to hangout with me, maybe not everywhere, but I still get to find at least one person that wants to talk with me and engage in interesting conversations even if all I’m doing is just listening to their ramblings.
Because autistic or not, you have to have an open mind and maybe just make some effort to get along with people instead of looking at them like separate depersonalized categories.

No. 1580023

>>1579778
This is sadly true but when you do find a another woman with whom you can talk about the topics that interest you, it's the best sort of relationship. Nothing else compares.
>>1580015
> Just going to another city may surprise you and let you meet new people that you can connect with
You don't sound autistic at all. What's next, "live, love, laugh" as an advice?
I'm sure most autistic women have experienced how alienating it is to be a social outcast among peers and girls can be particularly cruel if you don't learn how to fit in. So it doesn't come off as a surprise that there is going to be a decent amount of autistic women that are disappointed and disillusioned with friendships.

No. 1580024

>>1580015
A lot of people commodify human relations, including friendships, thinking those have to fit a certain criteria to be valid (and often, those criteria are vapid, usually not the essential things like respect, good intentions, etc and more vain things like common interests and how can people benefit from them in a material way), autistic people also do it too.

No. 1580027

>>1580023
Let me get you my official diagnosis so you can corroborate that I’m an autist then? Girl, just because you have had bad experiences doesn’t mean that everyone is shit. I was bullied to hell and back for being an autistic idiot and not understanding what I was doing “wrong” I don’t get along with /everyone/ people /knows/ that there’s something “wrong” with me.
I still get mocked by some people like some family members or friends of those family members.
But just because I’ve had bad experiences doesn’t mean I have to become the next judge that says “from now on all females will be vapid and boring bimbos that only talk about hair, clothes, eat hot chip and lie”.
But have fun never making friends unless they’re 4chan /r9k/ losers or redditfags.
It’s sad to see people using being autistic as an excuse to be an asshole.

No. 1580045

>>1580027
It's hard to believe that someone who is autistic would think it's advisable for another autist to simply waltz into another city and hopefully meet new people and connect with them.
> Let me get you my official diagnosis so you can corroborate that I’m an autist then?
The diagnosis doesn't mean a thing anymore and I say that as someone with an official diagnosis as well. Everyone with a bit of social awkwardness and nerdy interests now likes to label themselves as autistic and can get a diagnosis for it which wouldn't matter if it didn't establish unrealistic expectations for actual autists who are naturally going to be puzzled as to why they have far more trouble than these "autists" who are able to make plenty of friends with ease, do networking, get married, have children, and don't even have any special interests to start with.
> “from now on all females will be vapid and boring bimbos that only talk about hair, clothes, eat hot chip and lie”
I wouldn't agree with that but it is difficult to find another woman to talk about specific interests that don't involve beauty, fashion, gossip, and other interests that are typical for women. It doesn't mean that women who are into make up and such are vapid (there's a strong cultural & social component to it which rewards women for being like that) but it's hard to make a connection if you have completely different interests and personalities. Normie women are more likely to "other" you first not the other way around and they're the first ones to bug you for being a certain way instead of more like them. If you don't conform to these rules, you're out of the clique.

No. 1580051

>>1580045
Nta I think you're having a sour grapes moment. Women I meet have extremely varied interests, I know philosophers, scientists, writers, sportists, you name it. The narrowness you describe just doesn't exist.

No. 1580060

>>1580045
you clearly don't know enough women. most women are something beyond having to look good to society or taking care of someone. those are duties, not interests.

No. 1580064

>>1580060
It's just a typical defence mechanism.
First she gets othered and not accepted in the clique, so then she goes "oh they suck I didn't even want it in the first place" like the proverbial fox.

No. 1580079

>>1580045
It took me years of going out of my comfort zone to be able to talk to random people comfortably. Hell, I still get nervous when I do things that are outside of my routine, as in to the point of feeling strong palpitations and wanting to throw up.
I just think that being autistic doesn’t mean you have to live like some one dimensional person forever, while also considering others one dimensional too.
It’s hard to get out of your comfort zone and intrusive thoughts telling you that you’re fucking up and that everyone hates you or thinks that you’re weird but I don’t think it’s impossible. Some people even find it interesting when you talk about how much you love trains, specific fashion eras, types of coffee, philosophy or arts.
I guess live, laugh, love kek.

No. 1580103

>>1580045
So what are you interests then that you can't find any woman who is into that?

No. 1580121

how tf am i meant to make friends??? i feel like everybody feels annoyed by my presence alone, and whenever i "make a new friend", they stop talking to me days after. i have no interests to share with people, and i feel horrible because whenever someone is barely nice to me, i obssess easily, and i've only have had one friend who didn't share my interests or commitment to our friendship, and she was only with me because she felt bad for me.

No. 1580131

I hate how people in this site associate autism with troonism. Yes, I know about the Chris-chan lite degenerate AGP scrotes and the kids being groomed via social media, but I think a lot of these "autistic trannies" are actually cluster B or munchies larping as auties for “opressed points”, since most of them are too much of attwhores and profiteers to have true ‘tism™.
Also, I consider the fact of me being a "terven" nowadays directly related to my actual asparagus™: I never believed in the "trans women are women, trans men are men" woo-woo bullshit and only had empathy for them for thinking it must suck to have dysphoria, but nowadays any rape ape can put on a skirt and go into the ladies' bathroom, there’s all this "trans youth" Mengele-like pedo shit, etc., I see no reason to support them just for "be nice" reasons and social acceptance by the woke crowd.

No. 1580147

Nonnas I'm kinda reeling a bit and need to get this off my chest. I was diagnosed when I turned 18 after some shit went down and I needed a psych assessment. I've always kind of written it off because nerdy girls and assertive girls get pathologized a lot and it was the 2000s, every nerd was claiming they were an asshole because they had Asperger's syndrome. Plus I was in a really bad place in my life and was on a lot of drugs so how accurate could that assessment possibly be even if it did take two weeks. I'm just an asshole with anxiety lol

I was hiking with my mom recently and she causally mentions that when the docs told my parents I was autistic they literally laughed and said no shit, they've known that since I was a small child. They "figured out what was wrong with you" after reading some book about autists. Apparently a bunch of my elementary school teachers told them they suspected I had autism too. What the fuck? Why did no one tell me? They knew all this time and they still put me through all that shit? They did all that shit to me knowing it was just autism? Was the reason they were way harder on me than my sister because they were trying to train the autism out of me?

IDK. I try to forgive and forget the shit she put me through because we have a good relationship now, she was young, and our religion is hideous and abusive. She actually worked on herself, admitted her wrongs, and has done her best to make amends so I don't want to hold it against her. I figured she didn't know any better but now it kinda feels like it was on purpose and she was trying to abuse the autism out of me. Learning I am such a massive autist that everyone around me knew and talked about it is really humiliating too. I didn't think I was acting that strange but I guess I really was. Why didn't anyone tell me why I was having such a hard time?

No. 1580274

>>1579778
> If you want to discuss politics, religion, science, etc. you have to find a specialized group or class.
I understand your frustration but I'm so over people complaining that they're unable to find people to talk about politics, religion, or science with. Those people are always so insufferable and you can't even disagree with them so what's the point in these discussions.
I'm not calling you insufferable I don't know you well enough to say something like that but personally I want more "normie" friends and I recommend you gravitate towards people that are actually fun to be around because having "friendships" built on debating the above topics is not good for you.

No. 1580280

>>1580131
>I hate how people in this site associate autism with troonism.
I associate it with both troonism and terfism. I believe autists are more vulnerable to getting caught up in the trans ideology than average people for many reasons. But then I also see clear patterns in that terfs, gender criticals and people who base their stance on science and logic are more often than not on the spectrum too. I think to some degree we autists lack the social awareness to get that we were supposed to shut up and nod along to the lies like everyone else.

I think there statistically is an over-representation of autists who identify as trans, but there are so few autists to begin with that even within the trans community they're still a small minority. Realistically I think they're less than 10%, but they're probably more likely to be internet dwellers who make unhinged posts so they look more common than they are because those unhinged posts are what we end up seeing.

Truly I think most disordered groups are more likely to end up in the trans community. They've sold it as the one and only cure for literally every problem a person can have, be it mental, physical or social. Above all else they highly encourage narcissism and a victim complex. It's a scary cult of lies, but it has made me better understand how and why religions got so big and that's something I've wondered my whole life.

No. 1580797

How do you nonnies feel about this meme?

No. 1580807

>>1580274
This. It's fucking exhausting to deal with someone who always wants to debate or talk about heavy topics. Sometimes I just wanna talk about makeup or goofy shit

No. 1580816

>>1580280
there's definitely a disproportionate number of autistic young women in gc and radfem spaces, probably because most of us have been peaked or directly affected by this shit in our friend circles and interests. it may be the case with older gc women too, i've believe i've seen some also discussing autism and adhd traits.

No. 1580819

>>1580797
he. is. a surgeon. HE IS A SURGEON, he is, he is a sir gin, he is a SURGEon dr han. he is a surgeon!

No. 1581724

does anyone else feel the need to chew on everything? I bite my nails in public and in private I'm chewing on pencils and stuff. Ironically enough I'm really squeamish when it comes to drool and spit but I chew on stuff unconsciously but when I realise what I'm doing I start freaking out. its embarrassing

No. 1581812

i just need to rant a bit about this because it's really bumming me out. i hate being adhd, it makes my life so much harder and worse in every single area. i have lost jobs because of it. even when i have been able to keep jobs, i do a worse job than other people, and i can tell that my bosses and coworkers think im stupid. the worst thing is when people expect me to know things without being told them or ever being trained. i know everyone has to struggle with this to some degree but for me its noticeably worse and combined with my fake cheerful work personality people end up treating me like i'm braindead. in school i could get accommodations for things like notetaking, but i don't struggle with taking notes when i'm on medication, and even before then it was something i knew would help me learn so i made myself do it anyway. what i cant get accommodations for is what i really struggle with. things that everyone assumes you will know, all the dates you have to remember, all the billion unwritten rules for things. i'm not autistic, i can read facial expressions and i know social cues, but i still struggle because there i just forget things and my emotions are overwhelming so i can't act normally, i CANT act normally even if im happy, i cant remember everything i'm supposed to remember, i cant keep up with the things im supposed to keep up with. i know i'm not stupid but it doesnt matter because in practice, i am stupid. i act like a stupid person acts so what's the difference. even when talking to people who are also neurodivergent, it's hard to express how much harder adhd makes my daily life. someone who i consider a friend talked about how annoying people with adhd are. yeah i fucking know. i know i'm annoying and i cant behave normally, i know i'm flaky and hypersensitive and either talk nonstop or am dead quiet. i wish i wasnt this way so bad. i dont want to be annoying and stupid. i dont want to overreact. i want to be able to remember things and pick up on things like other people do. at the very least i'd like it if people recognized okay, this is a developmental delay, not an excuse i made up to be annoying. i don't know. i feel so hopeless.

No. 1581845

>>1438835
sage for off-topic - but omg, I loved Nemi so much as a child/teenager. Thank you OP because that really brought me back to being a baby goth

No. 1581865

>>1580274
>>1580807
I have enough surface relationships, sometimes I just want to meet ONE person who understands my niche views who won't totally eradicate my humanity and ditch me if they disagree on something controversial. All the rage replies I got only prove my point.

No. 1581868

>>1581865
Just study a career like literature, that’s where I met my best friend who is a sperg about stuff like politics and such.
I honestly don’t get the appeal of talking about such things in general, specially because they always end up with people getting butthurt and relationships getting cut off.
I prefer just reading about them and understanding where things come from, just acknowledging that my points of view are uniquely based on my personal experiences and that everyone also has their own opinions on many things like who should be in a position of power, who should be in charge of some things and whatever else there is.
I’m genuinely curious though, what exactly would you like to discuss that you wouldn’t be able to discuss on a Reddit blog or here?

No. 1581870

>>1581865
> I just want to meet ONE person who understands my niche views who won't totally eradicate my humanity and ditch me if they disagree on something controversial
Honestly? Normies are like that. The only people I feel comfortable talking about controversial topics are considered "normies".
This is irrespective of gender. If you find a chill woman you can talk with her about almost anything, same goes for guys.
Again good luck with your journey

No. 1582044

>>1579778
Sounds like a you problem nonna. I don't understand other autistic women who only want to hang with the guys. I've met lots of women autistic or neurotypical that I've had deep conversations with. Sucks to suck I guess.

No. 1582182

>>1579778
People are attacking you, but you are right. I don't bother with irl women either for the exact same reason, idgaf if it's mean or makes me a nlog, it's just true. That being said, i'd rather just continue to be alone than befriend moids and have at least been able to find like minded women online after years of digging.

No. 1582191

>>1579778
I’ll agree most women are brain dead but most normie men are brain dead too and the only ones who deeply care about politics are psychotic

No. 1582227

>>1582191
So you’re an enlightened being, right? Tell us your wisdom, educate us then.

No. 1582338

>>1582227
this thread has been hijacked by r/iamverysmart types

No. 1582636

Does anyone else have troubles with answering phone calls? Not in some “ugüu I’m so nervous ogüo” way but in a “I know I should answer this call but this task isn’t finished yet so I can’t do it” way. Is there a way to override the task I’m doing so I can answer a call? I keep getting nagged by everyone because I don’t do so but I can’t help it.

No. 1582676

>>1580274
This right here. Somehow it's all feeeeemales fault that you can't get along with someone who doesn't share not only your exact interests, but your exact way of enjoying those exact interests, and your exact opinions on those exact interests. I understand the frustration that clones of ourselves don't exist to be our bff's, but neurotypical people aren't less than us for wanting to talk about casual things that everyone can relate to and not constantly engage in spergfests. I only understand the other side of this because my father is even further on the spectrum and fucking insufferable. Neurotypicals compromise and understand that relationships are a mutual exchange, you don't always get to say and do exactly what you want to, when you want to, you play along with each other's quirks and make sacrifices. The subjects of small talk are not the only thing normies care about, they just understand that there is a time and place for things and don't force their personal philosophy on anyone within earshot. They play along with popular consensus to keep the peace, but will speak their true opinion once trust is established. They are more than they seem, and walking around thinking you're better than everyone only makes you more off-putting.

No. 1582901

>>1582676
It's pretty standard for autistic people to care only about their own interests and brush off other people's while never shutting the fuck up about their own, better she be friends with people who actually share her special interests than endlessly irk people who dont want to hear about speedruns.

No. 1583389

>>1582191
ew you're the exact type of autist I hate. you're not better than anyone else, get over yourself. no wonder you're here asking how to make friends. why would anyone, autistic or not want to be around someone who thinks they're better than everyone else? go away

No. 1585751

>>1582636
I just tell people I don't do phone calls so text or email me instead

No. 1585759

>>1582676
I'm the opposite, my true special interests are mine and I don't want to share them like I'm an annoying jealous girlfriend. But I love it when others sperg about their interests to me and then in my mind I relate it all back to my own interests.

No. 1588462

I've been working in one place for almost 2 years, it's my very first job. It's very noisy and I had to literally traumatize myself in order to stay there, I was vomiting and suffering from chronic diarrhea from stress for the first 2 months of working there. At first I also didn't talk to literally anyone and they almost fired me for the lack of communication. Then I was constantly asking questions about the same thing, which also irritated them. Then when I learned certain things, I was faster and more productive than my neurotypical coworkers, but I was still a total spaz, not "representative enough for the company". They couldn't sent guests to me because I would sperg out, unable to talk to a total stranger. I still don't socialize much, although way more than before, but overall I feel like they still don't take me seriously, no matter how hard I work. Other coworkers have small talks with our manager etc., I can't do that. My behavior is the main problem. Sometimes I feel like I can't do it anymore, but I'm so scared of any kind of change and new people and now when I kinda got used to people here I don't want to traumatize myself again by changing job and meeting new people. Every day is the same now. The first 5 hours are kinda ok. But during the last 2-3 hours of my shift I'm getting gradually more angry, irritable and agitated and I can't control it, I can't control my autism. I'm overloaded from multitasking, noise from the music, machines and people's voices all around me and it literally makes me insane. I feel like my face is burning and my eyes are blurry. Sometimes my coworkers point out I'm being mean and ask what's wrong with me etc. One of them is also offended by the fact I don't say goodbye when we finish and I just walk out as fast as I can. But I just can't help it, I just want to leave as fast as I can, I don't think straight, I don't think about whether to say goodbye or not, I just want to be alone in my room. It's friday and fridays are literally the worst. Every friday I feel like I'm changing into someone else, just pure anger and stress. I wish I could find some way of out this, but I feel like I can't, I can't change who I am, and I'm too scared to change my job

No. 1588700

>>1588462
This is almost exactly how I felt at my first job, I was undiagnosed and it was pretty much the only line of work accessible to me. The daily anxiety from struggling to socialize, getting reprimanded for every honest mistake, and constantly watching the clock became so fucking painful and perpetual that started getting blackout drunk as often as I could. Of course it only made things worse in the long run so I don[t recommend that.

Get another job. It will be another challenge in a lot of ways but it also be an unbelievable relief. You do not need to subject yourself to feeling like this for the rest of your life.

No. 1589395

Im not really sure where else to ask this but how do you deal with being bullied as an adult? My coworker is literally three years younger than me but she comes in off the clock and calls me names and throws stuff at me as a "joke". Yesterday she threw a cup directly at my face pretty hard and didn't get in trouble. I thought about hitting her back but I didnt. I don't want to be a snitch and ask the manager to do something(not sure what action would even be taken tbh) but I don't know what else to do. I also dont want to get a new job because it was a miracle I got this one. I guess I don't really have anyone I can ask for advice so I'm asking here. For what it's worth Ive tried responding with only kindness and her behavior is just getting worse

No. 1589407

>>1589395
I personally would talk about it with my manager if telling her to stop on different tones doesn't work. If the manager does nothing about it, i don't know in what country you are in, but in mine i can threaten to send either work inspection or (kinda the equivalent of) an union and tell them that the manager is doing nothing about work harrassment and it's worsening your mental health (and mention to them that you got adhd/autism if your employer knows that).
My mom (who funnily enough was the one that passed to me her adhd), was in a similar situation and only when she threatened to notify the union she was part of did they do something, with apologies added on top.
Ik sometimes you don't want to pass for a snitch but if you can't deal with it by diplomacy and discussion, you gotta try threats.

No. 1589418

File: 1685215615297.jpg (246.82 KB, 2400x1080, Screenshot_2023-05-27-20-49-25…)

>open youtube
>gets random monster high g3 video recommended
>i watched some of the g1 cartoons as a kid maybe i should see what all the g3 fuzz is about
>play video
>character say she is autistic
it's surreal how normalised it has become to discuss autism in media. I don't think it's a bad thing but I don't think I'm ever gonna get used to hearing people say it in cartoons since autism was so taboo when I was growing up and no one thought girls could have it. Based on this short clip I saw the character isn't portrayed in a negative way either though I do think they mixed up autism with social anxiety but those disorders do share symptoms when it comes to shyness and being socially awkward, I guess. she spends a long time sperging about books and when they need a certain book she just shurgs and say "they probably don't need my help". Personally I lose all my shyness when I get the opportunity to sperg about my fave things She is very sensitive to noise though which I find relatable.
But overall I don't know how I feel about autism being discuss so much in children's media. On one hand it can help kids with autism but I also fear that highlighting autistic traits can make them easier targets for bullying but they where probably going to be bullied anyway. I think I'm overthinking this
Unrelated but I can't deal with Frankie's and Clawdeen's new personalities. They remove Clawdeen's appeal by making her a geek and why did they make Frankie the ditzy, hyper one when that would had suited Draculaura better

No. 1590961

>>1589395
No matter the job she's being unprofessional and you should snitch on her.

No. 1590962

>>1588462
>I'm overloaded from multitasking, noise from the music, machines and people's voices all around me
Noise-cancelling headphones nona! Or if you like music, regular ones with your own chosen music

No. 1591829

>>1589418
I don't think I like it being mentioned by name, I prefer it to be like before when characters were just "coded" autistic. Autists will still see themselves in the character, normies or people with other disorders who share a few traits will see themselves in them too. Less risk of misinformation being spread or people larping it as a trend.

Maybe it's the autism in me, but I don't ever feel the need to be "represented" in things I see. At no point in my life have I consumed anything and actually thought "I wish they had my race/nationality/sex/appearance/autism" in this. It never bothered me that the fellowship of the ring was all male, it didn't bother me that everyone in Mulan was Asian, it didn't bother me that none of the Disney princesses are autistic and so on.

No. 1591911

File: 1685445366251.jpg (705.98 KB, 1875x2500, 101667397_p5.jpg)

I think I may have autism, obviously higher on the spectrum since I live on my own, have an OK job and degree. I never really thought about it when I was younger, I just thought that I was weird and that I needed to change. I used to cry that no one wanted to be my friend in school, or felt as passionate about things as I did. From my whole K12 experience I was always outcasted or bullied or ignored, when I did have opportunities to be around "normal" girls I had troubles relating or just tried to hard and outed myself as weird. I always struggled with topics or classes I saw as "pointless", no matter how much my teachers or parents yelled at me. I get very hyperfocused on my hobbies and interests and cycle through them (one month I'll be very into learning more advanced coding, the next I'll be very into reading manga after manga). I always feel ashamed when I'm overwhelmed/over stimulated and want to shut down/hide but know that I can't. It hurts to think about how girls are so overlooked with ASD, even if it turns out I DON'T have it. Boys get the diagnosis so easily and then end up being even MORE coddled than boys already are, but girls just get told to change themselves and stop doing things that come natural to them. I also grew up in the rural Bible belt so that didn't help, a girl having autism in the area I grew up in was basically impossible unless it was VERY obvious.

From the perspective of other anons I want to know; is it worth getting a diagnosis at 25? I'm very sure my parents would be in denial, it wasn't until I finally moved away that I got diagnosed for a brain adenoma and PCOS because my parents just ignored or gaslighted me about how I was feeling. Other parts of my life wouldn't care either since I don't "act" autistic enough. So would the diagnosis really just be for peace of mind? I'm also scared of being turned away by specialist or laughed at because autism is "in" now and I'm sure they get weekly patients seeking diagnosis because they saw a tiktok or twitter meme. Sorry for typing so much.

No. 1592010

>>1591829
>I don't ever feel the need to be "represented" in things I see
I feel the same way. I never felt the need to see autism discussed in media. In general I have always seen characters as well…. characters, instead of something I can project on to. I genuinely got sureprised when I first joined online fandom spaces and saw people discuss how much they love a character because the character is relatable. There might have been some traits and living conditions I can see myself in when it comes to fictional characters but overall I never felt the desire to see my exact story and life being told. Even when it comes to characters that are similar to me I still just see them as a tool to tell a story instead of going "she is literally me fr".
However I can see the positive in having openly autistic characters in media for children(I know Monster High has a huge adult fanbase and the reboot is cashing in on that but there is still going to be small children who watches this) because it can be used to explain what autism is. If a girl gets a diagnose at a young age her parents can say "it's like how Twyla is sensitive to noise you are the same way" or if a little girl befriends an autistic girl her parent can say "you know how Twyla have the need to stim? Your friend experiences the same thing"of course a parent would say this less blunt-y but you get the jist of it.
But there is going to be a risk of people faking autism when it gets so much publicity which is super annoying. Cartoons can't really go on a tangent with "only a doctor can see if you have autism" because it would turn the episode into a lector and ruin the fun of a cartoon. I think now that discussing autism has become less taboo we also need to emphasise more on seeking out a diagnosis and how claiming you have something you don't is hurtful. I don't have kids so I don't know how to solve that. Parents and teachers now have anew task in talking about disorder-faking with their kids

No. 1592012

Being pretty as well as spergy is a curse. People think I'm a stuck up bitch who is too good to talk to them, and not that I'm too retarded to have social interactions. So many people have said they thought I was mean before getting to know me, bc I keep to myself and dont seek interactions and look well presenting and put together otherwise. Wish I could trade some looks for social skills.

No. 1592310

>>1592012
Oof same. Back in school one girl came to talk to me and after some weeks she finally confessed that she thought I would be an asshole but I'm actually nice.
I don't know people automatically assume I'm going to treat them like trash

No. 1592319

>>1589418
Tbh I'm more angry that they made Frankie a they/them. All the fucking instagram posts discussing Frankie's dolls are full of tards who correct you at the speed of light if you call Frankie by she

No. 1592439

Does anyone else hesitate to tell people that you're autistic because you're worried people will assume you're a self-diagnosed attention seeker? When I first started working at my current job, the only person I told was my boss. Earlier this month, they hired this retarded TiF who constantly mentions that she's trans, "poly" and autistic. It fucking pisses me off because she so obviously is not, and she actively bullies one of my other coworkers who is a legit autist. She's making things harder for us and I despise her for it.

No. 1592907

>>1592439
I have only ever told a handful of friends partially for the reasons you listed. I come off as high-functioning though according to them so I don't feel as compelled to ever mention it. There just isn't much of a reason to ever bring it up. Plus, I don't let my diagnosis define who I am. I really dislike how it seems over-diagnosed these days because it feels like a lot of people do use it as a label to attention whore, especially the genderspecials.

No. 1592908

>>1592010
>we also need to emphasise more on seeking out a diagnosis and how claiming you have something you don't is hurtful.
I really wish this was discussed more but fakers will reee about "gatekeeping" a diagnosis

No. 1592909

>>1592319
It made me hate Frankie. I wonder if they'll retcon her into a she/her again, or cut the character fully in a few years when the trans ideology scandal explodes.

No. 1593435

>>1590962
Unfortunately we can't wear headphones at work anon

No. 1593452

File: 1685581323852.jpeg (76.91 KB, 720x960, 1662519871904.jpeg)

>>1592907
It's not even over-diagnosed. Most of the people using it right now (especially on Tumblr and Twitter) are "self diagnosed," i.e., not actually autistic. The other day at work I felt SO tempted to ask this bitch when she got diagnosed, because I knew she'd spout some nonsense about how she's self-diagnosed because fuck the system or whatever.

No. 1593484

>>1591911
Unless autism is actually causing you issues, then it's pretty pointless to get a diagnosis.

No. 1593485

>>1593435
Can you wear earplugs?

No. 1597034

>>1591911
i know you got your information on autism from a bunch of zoomers faking cause they all love going on about how it is impossible to get diagnosed as a woman, it really isn't. They keep saying that because it makes it easier to LARP. If you genuinely believe you are autistic then get tested, it really isn't that hard especially now.

>>1592439
i don't tell anyone, they will either think you're tiktok autistic or genuinely retarded. There's no benefit in telling people you have a developmental disorder

No. 1597699

>>1597034
>i know you got your information on autism from a bunch of zoomers faking cause they all love going on about how it is impossible to get diagnosed as a woman, it really isn't.
I never thought about it like that before; you have teens whining it's hard to get diagnosed when they're like 16 and likely haven't even tried to get evaluated. Or if they have, it clearly failed and they didn't get the result they wanted, hence it being "hard".

While on the topic, what's everyone's least favorite autism lie you've seen spread by tiktok/social media? (saying vaccine causes it is cheating, pick another one lol)

No. 1597736

>>1597699
yeah i got diagnosed as a child in a, at the time, pretty backwards country, if i could get diagnosed here they sure as hell can in a western country.
They keep going on about how the diagnostic criteria don't fit women at all which is complete nonsense.

the most annoying lie is that autism has anything with someones moral or political values. Got into an argument on tiktok cause they kept saying that autistic people cannot be transphobic because a study showed autistic people have a strong sense of justice, i guess we are un-diagnosing anyone who doesn't have views popular in current year because there is no way someone can have different ideas of what is just.

They seriously think autism comes with some set beliefs rather than being a fucking developmental disorder, it's a cool club for kids that share your moral and political ideas and it makes you special and quirky, and not fucking miserable.

It was on a post about the good doctor, they absolutely hate that show bc they think he was transphobic, when it reality it's an incredibly woke show, he "understood" and accepted it later. They even had an episode with a "non offending" pedophile, trying to make people feel bad for pedos.

No. 1597760

>>1597736
>Got into an argument on tiktok cause they kept saying that autistic people cannot be transphobic because a study showed autistic people have a strong sense of justice
Funnily enough that is exactly why so many autists are against trans ideology. You can't convince my stubborn autist ass that physically cutting up mentally ill children's healthy bodies will magically heal their mental health. Or that they should be chemically castrated and have their brains developmentally stunted (there are enough of us already!). It's immoral and disgusting, everyone professionally involved with it should go to jail.

Ironically the same people reject the label "aspergers" because… the guy it's named after supposedly "experimented on autistic children"…? Sound familiar?

No. 1597782

>>1597760
it is absolutely insane, they are advocating for the sterilization of gay and autistic people (and weird fetishists but they love their girldicks), sterilizing the undesirables is totally not like what the evil natzees did though, this is totally positive. The terf autists i know all experienced body dysmorphia, i'm glad this shit wasn't popular when i was young because i thought i would be happier if i was a boy, there was no one encouraging this idea so i eventually learned to accept myself, but now the psychs would have encouraged me to go with this shit rather than offering help for my actual issues, i'd destroy my health and nothing would be fixed. It's not like their autism, anxiety or depression goes away after, they are all still miserable. I had a friend as a teenager that had all the issues i did, i checked up on her and she's had her breasts removed and is a gayboy now, but even more depressed and anxious than before. I doubt being constantly told that you are persecuted and at risk of hate crimes makes their anxiety any better, and worrying about passing etc. It's really insane that people don't see it for what it is, we look at some of the horrifying medical treatments of the past and wonder how they could do that… it makes no sense that so many people support this, that they don't see what they are doing.

No. 1599538

I should know better than getting into arguments but I got "called out" for being ableist because I said it's creepy and uncomfortable for most people to have a stranger tell them they're autistic the first thing they do. It's overly personal and not appropriate to tell a random person right away imo. The guy (adult, recently diagnosed, clearly high-functioning enough to go that long without it getting noticed) said he did it because he was scared of coming off as creepy and weird but he literally is making people feel exactly like that by dumping his disorder on them the second they meet. It's also definitely a safety risk if you're female.

No. 1599578

>>1599538
Last time some random person felt the need to tell me they’re autistic I could have guessed as much quite easily myself. You don’t have to tell everyone you’re autistic when we can tell.

No. 1599579

>>1599538
Last time some random person felt the need to tell me they’re autistic I could have guessed as much quite easily myself. You don’t have to tell everyone you’re autistic when we can tell.

No. 1599580

>>1599538
Last time some random person felt the need to tell me they’re autistic I could have guessed as much quite easily myself. You don’t have to tell everyone you’re autistic when we can tell.

No. 1599605

>>1599538
protip: be openly autistic from first impressions to filter normalfags and make people think you're dumber than you are

No. 1599623

adhd fag here. pysch also thinks high functioning autism.
ritalin doesnt do jack shit. i dont feel better but it keeps me awake during work hours (i only work part time because my brain is fucking stupid and its retail) all the stupid adhd tiktoks and memes talk about hyperfixation and random bursts of energy to clean and shit. ive only been hyperfixated on dumb internet shit, i have zero motivation to leave my room and will only do it for work (so i dont feel like a total piece of shit) for dick and for drugs. i love drugs nonnies, it feels like im living the same day everyday until it gets to the weekend and i can have my fucking dopamine from drugs and animalistic sex.

people at work can smell the autism on me. i try to wear makeup and look "pretty" so i can pass by hiding in the corner doing my menial daily tasks avoiding any socialization. the only coworkers who willingly talk to me are the filipino ladies, who are very epic.

i cant be fucked going through trying other basically meth pills right now but the ritalin doesnt make me more productive. ive lied to everyone saying i did an exam but i keep rescheduling it to next week. the ritalin also makes me have random heavy long periods but my doctors are moids so they dont listen. im on like 5 medications to make me function as a normal adult but i still cant do it. i cant drive because my spacial awareness is terrible and id end up killing myself taking a wrong turn. i cant figure out my left and rights if they get reversed somehow. i cant do basic math without feeling like my brain is itching. I feel entirely numb but when i stop the antidepressants i just want to cry (gay).

but being an autist woman is still fun and i wouldnt trade it

No. 1600208

>>1599538
it can be awkward but it's far from creepy

No. 1600221

I have weird medical history. A different nuero disorder essentially gave me the symptoms of adhd, and I am semi formally diagnosed asd, just never went all the way 'through' with test referrals from therapists Ive seen for unrelated reasons. Anyway, my 'adhd' like issues are so, so much better after getting nuerological issue finally treated. I fried my brain's attention span like every other person with an internet connection. Now that I function much better I have been actively training my focus and attention. Screen time is pretty low most days, I read more, draw more, write more, meditate. Its been a process and takes work, real work esp being phone addjcted prior. And I dont have adhd for real so I can imagine the struggle for anyone with it trying to do the same. There is a reason I didnt before my underlying brain issue was treated, it was so hard. Anyway. Now I can actually focus better, and be very in tune to the right here. But, when I get interrupted, I get more and more pissed. Its a bit unreasonable sometimes, like if I am focused on my tasks and my nigel says something in passing which is a convo initiation I feel a rage inside of me. I can no longer focus on what he says if there is any other voice happening, like a podcast and he wants to say something mundane like 'the package arrived' its like my brain immediate scrambles and neither he nor my podcast is heard and it fills me with anger. I have a much harder time switching tasks now. I cant text and then have someone say something to me kek it pisses me off. Idk if my asd is now showing up more with the rage at being interrupted or if by using ear plugs so often to aid in focus I lost the ability to filter noise? Idk.

No. 1600498

>>1600208
It can be creepy as all heck if you're a normie woman and a grown ass man comes up and starts talking about his autism and you have little to no knowledge what it means. Most people aren't chronically online in autist spaces nor have they (knowingly) met autists. A lot of people still think autism means "severely retarded" so in their eyes it's sort of the equivalent of an unknown guy who clearly isn't severely retarded coming up to you claiming he is for seemingly no reason.

I also personally think some autists use it as an excuse to not care about learning social rules. So instead of the guy blaming himself for having accidentally broken an unwritten rule and made a woman uncomfortable he can instead go "she's just an uneducated ableist, I don't need to change my beahviour because she's the one in the wrong here".

No. 1600502

>>1600221
>I fried my brain's attention span like every other person with an internet connection.
I have been seriosuly wondering about this. Some people claim ADHD in particular has been overdiganosed the last decades, but a lot of ADHD influencers say the opposite (of course, makes their fan base bigger kek) and we're simply now properly diagnosing more people. But then we have SO many studies showing all people's (especially kids) attention spans are going to shit because of how we've made media to be, having shit diets and having phones available at your fingertips. And the lack of toys and playing outside is swapped to flat screens, so practical hand abilities are lost too.

And not to defend males but we know boys are more likely to be into rough play and have a harder time focusing than girls on average. My friends young nephew is getting medicated for ADHD because his mom is convinced he has it, but everything described sounds like perfectly normal boy behaviour. I'm wondering if she honestly doesn't know girls and boys are "supposed to" behave diffrently. To be fair I'm an autist so maybe I'm not the best judge, but I have worked with young kids before and even I can tell the difference between male and female kids behaviour patterns. If we could medicate out stupid moid behaviour then that would be something, but I think all it's doing is giving werid drugs to these boys making them even more fucked up adult men later in life instead of dealing with their actual issues, if they had any.

No. 1600529

>>1600498 Agree with male autists using it as an excuse, creepy autist moids are the worst because they're male. They can say that and appeal for understanding but a few moments later they're behind you and smelling your hair.
Though in general I dislike whoever use autism as an excuse to be a nuisance or whiny piece of shits. They sadly weren't bullied or disciplined violently enough.

No. 1600749

A thing that annoys me with people with aspergers and high-functioning autism (as an apsie myself) is that how they think they get to speak on every issues regarding disabilities. I'm specifically thinking of media portrayal of disabilities but there probably are some more serious issues where this also happens.

Whenever a public discussion comes up of regarding something mocking or harming people with a physical disability, low-funcitoning autists or people with down syndrome. apsies always has to be peep in and say "I'm disabled and I don't have an issue with this". I know that it isn't easy growing up with aspergers and it does affect your life, but we can still live independently without care takers, we can still learn to blend into society, it's not easy but it's possible. Aside from that we got more agency and autonomy over our voices and life. Some disabled people are in extremely vulnerable positions and can't even get in a position where they can advocate for their rights.
I'm just tired of other people with aspergers who refuse to see that some disabled people have it harder than others and insist on the can relate to every issue regarding disability. Aspies always has to shoehorn themeselves in on the discussion of ableism and act like an authority on itof course everyone on the autism spectrum experience some form for ableism in their lives but c'mon you can't claim you understand every aspect of ableism because it's impossible to experience it all. It's like when people with depression and anxiety claim that their mental illness is exactly being in a wheelchair, I'm not saying you aren't struggling but don't take over other people's issue and make it about yourself.

I also hate how many burger aspies I have seen who are working on removing the aspergers diagnosis and removing high/low-functioning label and just call it all autism. That is only going to harm the low-functioning autists. They deserve to be able to talk about their specific struggle and get the accommodation and help they need, which is completely different from the accommodation high-functioning autists needs. If we remove the distinction between high and low-functioning then all accommodation is made to suit one type of autistic, which either means that high-functioning autists can no longer get help because they no longer qualifies as autistic, or that low-functioning autists lose all their help and accomidation because "other people with their diagnosis can function fine without all this help".

Anyway my point is that I have seen high-functioning autists and people with down syndrome talk about how they have no autonomy over their lives, are extremely vulnerable legally and statistically very likely to experience abuse. So aspies should stop drowning this conversation with "people made fun of me in school because I couldn't hold eye-contact", it's not the same!! stop speaking on these issues!!!!!!

No. 1600816

>>1593484
If it doesn't affect your day-to-day life, then you DON'T have autism. Everyone with autism has issues in at least one area of life.

No. 1600828

>>1600749
Nonny, same. And I really hate when autism/aspie or depressed people talk over physically disabled people and won’t let us exist without having to whore all the attention. Like I know it’s kinda silly but Eda from the owl house is an extremely rare actually decent representation of physical disability and chronic illness but any discussion on it gets drowned out because she’s been claimed by the mental illness gang.

No. 1601527

>>1600749
I feel like a good portion of those "aspies" aren't even autists to begin with but people who are self-diagnosed because they're "quirky and different" and like the attention they get from speaking about it. But perhaps I just get defensive because I so strongly disagree with these people and don't want to be associated with them at all.

But even then it just proves the point that I've also been saying for years, that merging the two, autism and aspergers, was a mistake from the start. They are better explained and treated separated from each other so I absolutely agree with you, and it IS the fault of mainly American self-diagnosed "autists" rejecting the label.
>either means that high-functioning autists can no longer get help because they no longer qualifies as autistic,
I've long since decided that I'd much prefer this outcome where I am actively harmed by no longer being labelled an autist, if it means autist goes back to just meaning the low-functioning end and all the "high functioning yet somehow magically without a single issue" self-diagnosers all got kicked out. If everyone is an autist, no one is an autist. I only have a sliver of the struggles some other people have, and that's enough to convince me that they have it hard enough that they need and deserve help more than I do and should be prioritized.

>>1600816
This is so true. If you do not match the criteria of a medical diagnosis, then you simply do not have it. The struggles are in the criteria. And the struggles are such that they would still be struggles no matter if the outside world changed to be accepting, because the problem is within us. As someone once told me "you can't diagnose a sprained ankle as a broken bone and be correct, even though your foot hurt in both cases". It's not really autism if you're just socially awkward, even if the social awkwardness is on the same level as an autists, for example.

No. 1601973

i cant fucking stand working in customer service i actually want to strangle each and every person. today i got so overstimulated by all the bullshit i almost passed out and got reprimanded. i cannot stand it

No. 1602003

>>1600502
Ayrt yeah I totally get what you mean. I know this is a thread for adhd nonas and dont want to piss anyone off, I am 100% certain its a real inherited disorder, and also it is a disorder that can be given to a person via environment. Im talking mostly children these days as young adults today still probably didnt have the sheer amount of stimulation kids do now, I think children's brains are forming and growing around the constant stimulation hence developmental adhd. And yeah between female and male there is a noticable difference in behavior on average i totally agree. I think adults w adhd should take a look into the nueroscience behind it as there are ways to take advantage of nueroplasticity in a way that mitigates symptoms of adhd, but I also do not want to imply it is easy to self cure, you know what I mean? Most women itt seem to be actively trying to handle things wheras my experience with adult males with adhd is just an 'oh well, let me pop an adderall and let it do all the work so I only need to be 'better' 9 hours a day with no effort outside of remembering meds'. A small anecdote from a lil while ago is that I was hanging out w my nigels sister and her kids. Those kids just straight up dont know how to entertain themselves, and their mom is actually astoudingly well disciplined parent when it comes to patience and structure and routine for the kids…. they just cant entertain themselves somehow. She ranted to me about 'what happened? When we were young we use to play with sticks and mud and it would be an intricate story of knights and castles and fairytales…its like they have no imagination' while tell them to go play outside. They just literally dont know how. I am an autist and love tinkering with hands on projects and so I took them and showed them how to blow massive bubbles with a pan of soapy water and a rickety makeshift bubble wand made from random trash wire and they LOVED it. I think the problem is also that most adults, normie or not, also lost their creativity, assigning it a 'thing' you lose when you grow up. Expecting a kid to just figure out how to engage with the world in an entertaining way, without seeing any examples from adults doing the same because we are all tired and want to sit down and mindlessly scroll to take a 'break' so the kids get sent outside to play, never understanding what real play actually is bc its a foreign concept. Idk why I ranted this weird disjointed rant, but whatever. My nigel does have adhd and I believe it, but fuck I wish he would actively attempt, even if the result is failure, to make some sort of behavioral adjuatment to deal w adhd and not just pop stimulants. He thinks that my attention comes easier somehow, but I actively work hard on that shit.

No. 1602063

Im sorry it sucks so bad. Im lucky enough to have left retail but one time back in the day a customer straight up put his hands on my neck while screaming 'is that a tattoo??!!??!', touching the basic black choker thing from the 90s I was wearing. People are shit a lot of times and dont even think about the humanity behind the service worker.

No. 1604345

>>1602003
>I am 100% certain its a real inherited disorder, and also it is a disorder that can be given to a person via environment.
I absolutely think you can "get" ADHD without having been born for it the way you say, but I can't see it for autism (not saying you said that, just speculating). I remember reading a bit of a study saying drug use in your teens led to ADHD later in life, so this is despite them having had 0 ADHD symptoms as kids which doesn't add up for the "can only born with it, it's natural" crowd. I think many autists naturally have ADHD as a symptom of how their autistic brain works (and neurotypicals not knowing how to deal with it stressing them out leading to the "problems" getting worse over time), but it's still far from every autist who has it. I think for a non-autist to get autism they'd need some kind of severe brain trauma during their developmental years that makes their brain reroute in a way that happens to mimic an autists brain, which would be super unlikely to happen even if it technically probably isn't impossible. In the end I think the real spectrum is ADHD and not autism, there are a billion reasons why someone could develop into having a hard time focusing and end up perfectly fitting the ADHD criteria, while autism really is more narrow. I guess the fact that you can also "medicate away" ADHD to some degree but not autism is also in a way proof of this.

Anecdote - I watched a detrans youtuber who claimed she was autistic for a while when she was trans but got cured from it. The next minute she said she sees herself like a cold unemotional robot just mimicking real humans - I was watching it thinking "sweetie you clearly are still an autist" kek

No. 1604453

File: 1686570210845.jpg (97.7 KB, 1080x1370, Screenshot_2023-06-12-13-33-01…)

omfg shut the fuck up. Everyone thinks they have autism or adhd now. while it's a good idea to research the disorders before seeking a diagnosis if you suspect you have them. But suspicion isn't proof enough that you have autism/adhd. It's like thinking you have ocd just because you don't like dirt

No. 1604457

>>1604453
This is the same thing they do with gender identity.
>If you have to ask, the answer is yes

No. 1604466

>>1604453
It's the fault of the shrinks making the symptoms too broad and vague. They are like horoscope now, and I fully believe the ratio of autism diagnoses will rise until it reaches approximately 1 in 12. That's the % of any one sign in horoscope, and the broad 'symptoms' of autism are almost indistinguishable from traits ascribed to the Virgo sign.
They should just get rid of the "spectrum", it's obviously a failed idea. If such a huge percentage of people have these supposed symptoms, it's not a disorder, it's just a normal human variation. A classic personality type that is so prevalent throughout history it even got a horoscope sign.

No. 1604467

>>1604453
This isn't even how venn diagrams work

No. 1604486

>>1604466
>It's the fault of the shrinks making the symptoms too broad and vague.
As previously discussed, they really ruined it for autists by doing this shit. They keep saying "well all autists are different" but dear god were we all similar until the self-diagnosers came in

No. 1604489

>>1604486
It's a huge disservice to a very vulnerable population group. I hope the psychiatric industry comes to its senses soon.

No. 1604496

>>1604489
I think they should separate aspergers and autism again for real, they can give it a new name if they want (as long as it's cute, until then I will still call myself an aspie kek)

No. 1604503

>>1604496
Yeah, it was completely braindead to put them both under the same label. How does a high functioning, job keeping, independent person who struggles with social situations relate to a shit smearing non verbal sped? Every tool and help they need is going to differ. All bc uwuwu inclusiveness and omg nazi!!1!. Its completely retarded.

No. 1604531

>>1604503
I think the psychiatric industry is failing to uphold a high standard for itself as it should.
This results in such serious life-impacting blunders like that scandal about misdiagnosing tons of kids as trans in the UK.
The formation of the autism "spectrum" is another such blunder, negatively impacting people who have the worst autism symptoms.
It's like they're in a rush to slap everyone with swooping labels, where is the care for the individual

Another big problem I see is how psychology is divorced from sociology, it just takes for granted the current social climate and treats it as a healthy default and every deviance from it as a problem. But it's much more complex than that.

Nobody can hold the phych industry accountable apart from themselves, but they aren't interested in doing it.

No. 1604561

I hate having ADHD and I hate that I got diagnosed AFTER I was done with school. My entire school career was teachers sitting me down and asking me why my test scores were good when I never did homework, what's wrong, anon? I internalized it and thought that something must be wrong with me (and I guess there was lol). I really do think it made my depression so much worse than it could have been. I might go back to my psychiatrist and ask if we can try treating the ADHD primarily rather than continuing the frustrating anti-depressant route.

No. 1604896

So today was in the bus back home and there was a lot of people, noise, whatever so I put my earplugs and feel a little less anxious about the noise. But for some reason I started to feel worse and I was on the verge of crying for some reason. What the fuck happened there?

No. 1606241

>>1604896
Whenever I wanted to cry but didn't know why it tended to be related to my period for me, so is it possible that's it? Both around ovulation time and right before my period I get those hyper emotional days. I think it's easy for autists to not be in tune with our bodies so I felt it's worth pointing out even though it's "obvious". Especially because at least for me I was never told ovulation, which is like at the mid point between periods, could cause the same symptoms as PMS. I spent years being confused over why I got randomly depressed or had cramps thinking "oh must be my period is coming up tomorrow" only to wait two weeks with no sign of said period. All because no one ever told me ovulation could have the same symptoms.

On the other hand now as an adult my PMS days are often some of my best days, because rather than getting depressed-emotional I get happy-emotional instead and it is the biggest blessing I could ever have received. It's prime time for watching movies or reading books, because everything is an emotional masterpiece for me kek

No. 1606243

>>1604531
>I think the psychiatric industry is failing to uphold a high standard for itself as it should.
100% this. They now seriously think and advocate chopping of the breasts of a trauma victim at 13 years old who hates her body will help her because she's truly actually a boy, it is so ludicrous.
>>1604503
>All bc uwuwu inclusiveness and omg nazi!!1!. Its completely retarded.
I can't stand that other autists will accuse you of either being a nazi or "gatekeeping" if you say aspergers and autism should be split. Yes, I do in fact want strict gatekeeping when it comes to severe mental disorders, and every sane person agrees with me. I don't want scare resources meant for sufferers to go to people who don't need it in the first place.

No. 1607960

File: 1686847331066.jpeg (23.89 KB, 377x400, 6256cac1c6069.jpeg)

>>1580797
Ok nonas. Prepare for some major tinfoiling.
I think that the "I'm a surgeon" meme sprouted as a smokescreen for a less known meme of the same series that was becoming somewhat popular where Shaun (the surgeon) was being trannyphobic to a MtF patient. Shaun kept referring to him as -him- (based) and the other colleagues keep correcting him. Just to culminate with a "Well, she has testicular cancer" or something like that, funny shit in general.
That became popular and then out of nowhere the "I'm a surgeon!!!!" one appeared and the other one was forgotten.
The people of Twitter must be "happy to see that transphobe oppressor suffering!11"
I have no evidence but also no doubts.
Sperging over.

No. 1609928

I'm currently in the process of getting a diagnosis and I'm terribly afraid of the results. Reading anons here talk about how it's piss easy to get a diagnosis scares the shit out of me. What if I don't have it but I get misdiagnosed anyway? I only went to the docs because I wanted to get some answers, she told me I showed enough signs of it to warrant further testing, and this being healthcare, it's pretty standard that the entire process is going to take months and there hasn't been a day where I haven't spent at least a few hours thinking about it. Did I actually get hyperfixated on autism? What the fuck? I'm high functioning enough all things considered, but maybe actually not, since I'm a NEET. I do agree that aspergers and autism should be separated again, being an aspie makes so much more sense in my head than being an autist.

No. 1610993

>>1609928
If you get a diagnosis but think it's inaccurate you can go see another health care provider and ask for a second opinion. There should be notes about you in the diagnostic papers, so if they say something like "anon literally didn't shut up about their special interest the whole time, clearly an autist trait" and you disagree because you only mentioned said topic one time because they asked, and you're not actually that interested in it at all but they kept asking forcing you to reply, you can bring things like that up.

Part of the reason why it's so easy to fake tiktok autism is that normal people can super easily mimic autistic symptoms on purpose so they just have to go in and play pretend for a bit. Or even by "accident" (like how kids started getting actual tourettes symptoms out of nowhere just from watching people fake it on tiktok). If you're the kind of person who reads horoscopes and goes "omg this is SO true, I AM such a virgo sun rising tauros moon sauron star person, this totally makes sense the stars are right" then you're more susceptible to "adopting" disorders you don't actually have.

No. 1611721

File: 1687160105481.jpg (80.54 KB, 700x997, based.jpg)

Stolen from another thread but the person who coined the term "neurodiverse" is openly "transphobic" (also just known as capable of rational thought and logic), I thought she was too woke and pandering to the internet crowd from some previous statement so this was a huge win in my book.

You can usually easily trick an insecure autist into thinking they're trans, but once we've peaked we can never go back and we can't be bullied into shutting up about it, unlike the cowardly normies who half of the time end up backing down and apologizing.

No. 1611726

File: 1687161108302.jpeg (92.58 KB, 1242x668, IMG_1622.jpeg)

>>1611721
She back pedaled after being bullied and I think she deleted the original tweet too. RIP.

No. 1611728

>>1611726
so much for the "autists don't back down" lmao
tbh I don't actually know if she is an autist herself or just a researcher though

No. 1611732

>>1610993
I gotcha, for now I have a bit of faith in her because she pointed out that how other people see me is a lot more telling than how I think I act, especially if it's something that's consistent or happened when I was a child. The only other thing that made me a little miffed about sperging was that I felt like she was more interested in seeing me sperg than what I was sperging about. I'll only get the full diagnosis report in a little over a month, so fingers crossed.

Aspie nonnas, is it possible to be on the spectrum without much sensory issues? Like I'm totally okay with certain loud places if it's expected (movies, arcade) but I go fucking insane when I'm home in the living room with all the people moving around, watching TV, closing the door too loud or talking on the phone. And I guess I also hate showers, I hate the feeling of wetness on my skin. Like showers themselves is fine, it's when I come out of the shower that irks me. Ugh. Yeah, this is the one thing that makes me think I'm probably neurotypical.

No. 1611741

>>1611728
I think she said she is autistic in another tweet as a reason why she posted the transphobic thing. I partially think she’s full of shit and just trying to appease people but she doesn’t actually mean the apology. They aren’t even accepting it ofc because she apparently follows other terf accounts and has liked terfy tweets. She’s like 72 or something, people should give her a break regardless. Zoomers bullying an old autistic lady for thought crimes is peak twitter.

No. 1611747

>>1611726
Just thinking out loud here, but twitter really turns you weak. People who deal with science and research shouldn't be on it, they let it influence their thoughts and words too much, it's unhealthy both for themselves and for their work.

An analogy would be a classical musician posting their work, then one day they do a classical cover but of a modern pop song. More people are fans of pop music, so it gets more attention. This larger group keep praising only the pop song and asking for more pop covers and the musician caves. Suddenly they're only ever doing pop covers, no original works whatsoever, which in turn makes the original fans leave while feeling sad to have lost a rare modern classical composer. All the original thoughts and intention is lost to just mimic what is the most popular at the moment.

I think researchers face the same issue when they're told "gender is real", "troons are women" over and over. They start pandering and lose sight of what was the real issue.

No. 1611750

>>1611741
>I partially think she’s full of shit
I doubt she peaked in a day just from angry twitter troons. She should have pulled a Rowling and not backed down. All she's done now is 1) make troons mad but terfs happy, then 2) backpedal so troons are still mad and now terfs are disappointed and mad too.

No. 1611785

>>1611721
this highlights how much the trans movement revolves around denying reality. We can all agree that a white person claiming to be black is racist, and a black person claiming to be white is insecure. But the minute we say that a man claiming to be a woman is a misogynist then it's suddenly bigotry
>>1611732
>Like I'm totally okay with certain loud places if it's expected (movies, arcade) but I go fucking insane when I'm home in the living room with all the people moving around, watching TV, closing the door too loud or talking on the phone. And I guess I also hate showers, I hate the feeling of wetness on my skin. Like showers themselves is fine, it's when I come out of the shower that irks me
I feel the same way when it comes to sensory things. I'm also not bothered at all by bright lights and certain food texture like most aspies are. It's a spectrum for a reason people experience it differently. I still have other aspie symptoms like not being able to converse with other and struggling with holding eye contact and sitting still (several doctors have pointed out to me how my eyes keeps shifting when I talk to people) and general other aspie traits

No. 1611800

>>1611732
>Aspie nonnas, is it possible to be on the spectrum without much sensory issues?
Yes, but also no. Previous nonas have written it in these threads but every single autistic trait can be experienced by normies, and every trait can be because of something else even if you're autistic. It's both simple and complicated.

Sensory issues is one of the main traits of autism, so finding an autist without any sensory issues should be virtually impossible. But it's also extremely common for all people to be sensitive in some area. I'm someone who doesn't have a lot of sensory issues, or I accidentally "mask" out some of them. For example I'm light sensitive and really struggle with seeing outside if it's not overcast, but thanks to hats and sunglasses being seen as perfectly normal people don't get how much light hurts my eyes, and in turn it took me until I was an adult to understand that normal people aren't in constant pain and just pretending to be fine from sunlight like I was. But normal people also use sunglasses and hats for the same reason, because no one can really look directly into the sun without pain, so it might as well not be an autist trait and perhaps I just have weak eyes! Point is though, I had no idea it was me being "oversensitive" until normies were shocked that I couldn't see because of the sunlight. I thought my eyes were normal.

>for now I have a bit of faith in her because she pointed out that how other people see me is a lot more telling than how I think I act

This is probably a good sign. This also ties in with what I said above, I remember seeing a video pointing out an evaluation scenario of autism that made sense to me.
You had the evaluator asking the potential autist:
>"Are you bothered and get sensory issues from X?"
The potential autist replied:
>"Oh no, I'm not bothered by X. Because I have a system that keeps X from bothering me."
And that's a bigger sign of autism than if they had just said "yes, X really does bother me". The natural autist need for rituals and systems. And possibly the fact that (using myself as an example here) thinking something like wearing caps and sunglasses at all times warrants a "no" to the question if I'm bothered by light, when a normal person would probably say "yes, that's why I wear those things".
These are the details a trained clinician should know, as an autist I don't even get all of the signs they should be looking for.

No. 1611805

>>1611785
>this highlights how much the trans movement revolves around denying reality.
It actually makes me so happy that autists in particular are against and see through troonism. For all our flaws seeing how logical and honest you all are makes me feel empowered and like we're not so bad. Maybe we have shittier social skills, but we're not fucking stupid and see through lies even when normies can't.

No. 1611829

>>1611800
>I accidentally "mask" out some of them
I never considered this, it might very possibly be doing this but am completely unaware. Or it could be that I just don't have them at all. That evaluation video you pointed out also explains the autistic thought process pretty well. I can't remember from the top of my head in regards to anything like this for me, so that's up to my doc to get it out from me or the interviews with my family members.

>>1611785
>eyes keep shifting when I talk to people
This entire time I thought it was normal to do that! I have a subconscious timer in my head where I count how long I'm allowed to 'look away' and 'look at them' and people say it's rude to not look at the other person but also rude to stare so this entire time I thought it was pretty normal, till I asked my siblings about it and they admitted that my eye contact is unusual and that sometimes I say things with a facial expression that doesn't match. I really don't like looking too long into people's eyes, it feels like they're looking right into me. But this could also be anxiety. Come to think, that explains why I have a hard time remembering people's faces till I meet them over 5 times, because I'm barely looking at their faces properly most of the time kek

>>1611805
Not gonna lie I kind of disagree slightly with this, the number of troons who are also autistic is staggering. IIRC there's a few studies talking about the over representation of autistic traits among trans individuals. I swear troons probably just have autism. When was a tiny little girl I was more drawn to toys/clothes for boys and wanted to be a boy because I kept getting told 'you can't do that because you're a girl' but ultimately realized that I can still do and have all those things anyway, fuck the haters. I'd bet all the money to my name that they ended up TIFs because of gender rubbish spouted on twitter/tumblr and a sexist environment.

No. 1611832

>>1611829
>Not gonna lie I kind of disagree slightly with this, the number of troons who are also autistic is staggering.
ayrt, it's been discussed here before, autists are both more likely to be roped into the trans cult and to then get out and be against it. They'll all realize it eventually. I was talking specifically about seeing already peaked terf nonas though, it's amazing how many terfs are on spectrum.

No. 1611834

>>1611829
>Come to think, that explains why I have a hard time remembering people's faces till I meet them over 5 times, because I'm barely looking at their faces properly most of the time kek
I feel like my brain just exploded lmao this explains so much for me

No. 1611839

>>1611829
nta but isn't it normal to shift your eyes when you talk to someone? I find that when I'm thinking I have to look away, for some reason it's easier to find my thoughts when I'm not looking into someone's eyes

No. 1611849

>>1611829
>I swear troons probably just have autism.
I think it's more like "most (young and chronically online) autists identify as trans", but that overall most trans people aren't on the spectrum at all.

ROGD, trenders, homosexuals, and AGP tend to overall not be autistic, but there definitely is a a nerdy awkward autist class of troons as well, I just don't think they're as common as people try to make them out to be. But of course the groups can overlap, there are plenty of autistic AGPS and trenders too. Saying all ROGD kids are just all autistic is ridiculous, there are school classes where within a month or two 90% identify as some flavor of trans. The class isn't suddenly 90% autists.

When you say autistic TRAITS it's easier too agree, because they overlap even when the cause isn't autism for most of them. Like "being gender non-conforming" is a sign of both transness, autism and being gay. Doesn't mean a person is all of those things. Autists are vulnerable in many ways and other groups of people who are vulnerable in the same or similar ways thus get the same labels. The traits aren't necessarily "autistic traits" per se, but instead "traits that are common in several conditions, one of those being autism". Just my thoughts though.

No. 1611851

>>1611839
I think it kind of just depends on the person? It can easily just mean you're shy, or easily distracted, or scared of the person in question.
I end up staring at people because I was told eye contact is important and I'm focusing really hard on paying attention to them

No. 1611880

>>1611832
Fair enough, it's actually pretty great that most terfs here are like this so they 'get' that feeling of being different kek it makes their posts have that extra edge

>>1611849
>Saying all ROGD kids are just all autistic is ridiculous, there are school classes where within a month or two 90% identify as some flavor of trans. The class isn't suddenly 90% autists.
Yes of course, this is ridiculous, hence the 'probably'. I am of the opinion that the rest of the troons are probably either teen tryhard snowflakes that got brainwashed online. I actually did a quick fact check on this and:
>Autistic people are more likely to be transgender, which means having a gender identity different to one’s sex assigned at birth (Van der Miesen et al., 2018; Walsh et al., 2018). Warrier et al. (2020) found that that transgender adults were 3.03–6.36 times more likely to be autistic than cisgender people (i.e. people with congruence between their gender identity and sex assigned at birth). Other research has explored the relationship between autism and transgender identities, ranging from case-studies of transgender autistic individuals, to measuring autism traits and diagnoses of Autism Spectrum Disorder in transgender people and individuals accessing gender clinics, and rates of transgender identities in autistic individuals across the lifespan (for reviews, see Glidden et al., 2016; Øien et al., 2018; Thrower et al., 2020; Van der Miesen et al., 2016). This association may not be unique to autism; systematic reviews and large-scale studies have indicated that attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) may also be more common in transgender individuals compared to cisgender individuals (Thrower et al., 2020; Warrier et al., 2020).
Since the current stat of autism among children worldwide is 1 in 100, that would only raise it for transgender people by not a staggering amount. My logic deduction and application of math on these figures are likely extremely flawed so I'd take my own words with a grain of salt. But in that vein, you are correct. Gomen I have made a mistake

>>1611839
AYRT and yes it's normal? Though I was told that I shift too much. From my POV it's like a battle inside that I look, and then I look away because I get uncomfortable, and then I tell myself to look again and the cycle repeats. I get so pre-occupied with it that I don't remember actually looking at their faces properly. But to be fair others here pointed out that every single autistic trait can be experienced by neurotypicals. But that's enough blogposting for me. I'll keep you nonnas updated if anyone is actually interested.

No. 1611904

>>1611880
>gomen
u adorable weeb kek

No. 1611914

>>1611849
>there are school classes where within a month or two 90% identify as some flavor of trans. The class isn't suddenly 90% autists.
My discord group (fandom) is suddenly like 50% autist and I hate it. I'm a stealth autist in there so it makes me roll my eyes that they all have to loudly proclaim that they are oh so autistic. People don't give a shit and it's not gonna make a difference, if you act like an idiot and break rules people won't accept "oopsieee, am autist" and let you off the hook. I also can't help but wonder how many of them are "accidental fakers" given that all the new people are 100% woke, pro-trans worshippers etc. If tiktok told them autism is now white supremacy they'd stop being autistic within a week. And that's a fact given how none of them would touch the word "aspergers" with a ten foot pole, yet every single offline autist I've met prefers the term.

Is there a word for tiktok disorder adaption? Social contagion perhaps? But then saying autism can be caught via social contagion sends the wrong message. Or is it a subtype of hypochondria?

No. 1611940

>>1611914
I think Munchausen by Internet suffices

No. 1612046

File: 1687188934847.jpg (31.5 KB, 500x333, 1634754144849.jpg)

Is it possible to have autism without notable social deficits? I was diagnosed with autism when I was younger but I was also traumatized at that time which resulted in things like not being able to make eye-contact at all, barely could speak, selectively mute, monotone, no expression, etc. As I got older it turns out my general social skills are good, people would describe me (on initial meeting) as warm, friendly, people definitely tend to initially like me very much, I'm very polite and in a conversation I will pick up on non-verbal social cues. I almost never unintentionally say anything rude or inappropriate or ever make anyone feel uncomfortable, usually have a high awareness of that stuff (even more than an average NT). I can mostly tell along the lines of what people are thinking even if they are not saying it, or even if they say one thing but mean another I can usually tell. I'm also not sure if this is just another result of trauma, fawning, extreme desire to make people like me, and being hyperaware of non-verbal signals and small shifts in atmosphere because I constantly feel threatened. However all other autism stuff I connect with besides social capability. Sensory issues, stimming, special interest, I don't know if these can be attributed to other mental health issues (although I think some sensory issues can also be nervous system dysregulation due to trauma). I have zero idea how to explain the stimming without autism which I have done very heavily since childhood. Also even though I say my social skills are good, I am not able to really maintain friendships or anything like that because I get uncomfortable when I'm close to people and I am avoidant. I actually like small talk because I have had this conversation a million times already and I prefer something predictable and without sharing true feelings. Any friendship I have is with someone who is very eccentric, also autistic, and understands if I ghost them for a year at a time. I also experience severe social anxiety although I can mask this for periods and get the effect I described above of people liking me. I get extremely tired from social interaction and something like a one hour coffee with someone will ruin me that day and the next day (I will be paralyzed by anxiety beforehand and have to go to bed with the lights off for 24 hours after, I'll sleep badly and the next day I'll feel groggy and bad, plus everything that happened in the meeting will play on a loop non-stop for the day with added criticism, analysis).

Recently speaking to doctors and it sort of threw me because they asked how I felt about my autism diagnosis and said they did not see me having autism because of my social skills. This is after a somewhat in-depth, long interview. I like having the diagnosis because it more easily explains things like my level of functioning to me (barely can leave the house, can't get an education or job, can't have real relationships, can't drive, etc) and whatever is wrong with me I just find extremely confusing otherwise. By the way I am in my 30s so this is very much an established pattern of behavior, I have genuinely and honestly made big efforts and commitment to improve my life and it just never works out. Sorry for rambling nonnies, I would be very grateful for any advice or opinions if anything comes to mind on this topic.

No. 1612079

>>1612046
It's pretty common for autistic women to mask hard, are your interactions with people learned behavior? e.g. you learned how to read expressions, how to answer a certain way, how to move your face during a conversation and etc. Getting tired from socializing if you're masking is natural, you're pushing yourself to constantly act. Also a long in-depth interview, while helpful, is only small snapshot of your life. What did you talk about in the interview?

No. 1612153

>>1612046
I was diagnosed like a year ago and idk how it was back when you were diagnosed, but for me they heavily focus on questions about childhood trauma so they can rule that out as a reason for presenting autism symptoms. Yes you can have both, but it is also very possible that you have these issues directly relating to that trauma and don’t have autism. If you’re already diagnosed and fine with calling yourself autistic then it’s really not a big deal since your life is the same regardless of what causes your symptoms. but something to keep in mind

No. 1612247

>>1612046
>Is it possible to have autism without notable social deficits?
No, not really. It's a developmental disorder that primarily affects social abilities.

Nobody here can diagnose you but you know that already, and generally we don't like it when people use this thread to ask "am I autistic", but I think your case is interesting and want to offer insight anyway.
Often the most likely and obvious answer IS the answer. It seems the most likely answer is your "autistic" traits came from your trauma. And as you healed from your trauma you also healed some of those traits, which is a super good thing and I'm happy for you!

Something that's not pointed out enough is that nearly all autists have a direct family member who is also an autist, meaning a parent or sibling (or both). The number should be even higher if you expand to grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Even if undiagnosed, you should be able to recognize clear autistic traits in someone around you. So that's something to consider.

>However all other autism stuff I connect with besides social capability. Sensory issues, stimming, special interest, I don't know if these can be attributed to other mental health issues (although I think some sensory issues can also be nervous system dysregulation due to trauma).I have zero idea how to explain the stimming without autism which I have done very heavily since childhood.

Stimming is often a "self-soothing" method used even by neurotypicals. But to me it seems like it's fairly common for ANY kind of mental disorder and it being linked to autism specifically seems to be the fault of social media. Among ND people I've met it seems the ADHD side stim more than the "just" autistic side, but that is anecdotal. You say "since childhood", but if it was also around the time of your trauma that still seems to be a clear link there? Stimming appears to be common in distressed kids as a way of soothing and self-control, so at least to me it makes perfect sense that trauma could lead to stimming.

How intense are your special interests? Most people have something they're passionate about like a hobby or topic, and that's not something that should be pathologized. Was your interest established in childhood and has been an interest without a gap since then? Does it change or shift ever so often? Does it affect how you interact with other topics and interests? For me I developed my special interest in early childhood and it's my main interest to this day. I accidentally bring it into every other thing I do even when I actively try not to, because it truly brings me so much joy I can't stop myself.

Sensory issues is a very typical autistic trait, but it's not at all exclusive to autism. It could just mean you're sensitive in certain areas, or that you have lingering trauma. For example, soldiers with PTSD struggling with loud noises.

>I also experience severe social anxiety

Social anxiety is honestly disabling in of itself. I can't diagnose you, but to me it really sounds like your problems came from trauma rather than this one specific developmental disorder called autism. It might feel odd to suddenly have to think of yourself as possibly not-autistic anymore, but if such is the case that is absolutely the best possible scenario for you! Because it means you're not doomed to these traits, you can heal and overcome them! And that would be wonderful!

If I were you I wouldn't immediately discard the diagnosis, but I would move on as if I didn't consider it correct. You don't have to tell people about it if you don't want to, if you benefit from people thinking you're autistic right now then, fuck it, keep it for now. But basically ignore the "autism" and just hyper focus on further healing your trauma and your social anxiety. You matter as a person and you deserve to heal, you even owe it to yourself to try to heal. Don't look for autistic specific solutions, and instead look at them from other perspectives. Worst case scenario, it just turns out you healed your trauma further and still have autistic traits - so at least it won't get worse. This got pretty long and probably to rambly, but it's what you get when you ask an autist kek good luck nona!

No. 1612923

Does anyone have any experience with assisted living for autism? I'm currently planning on moving into an assisted living place per the recommendation of my psychologist because I cannot function well on my own but I'm kind of anxious about the whole process.

I also don't know if I should move into a group or if I should get my own apartment. On one hand, I don't want to be forced into doing group activities and I get overwhelmed when places are too crowded/chaotic but on the other hand, I tend to isolate myself very quickly and I'm worried I'll become even more of a hikikomori.

No. 1613022

I hate being both autistic and self-conscious, I wish I could be one of those severe (usually male) autists who gives no fucks about what people think. Can I train myself to stop caring about masking and just be myself?

No. 1613027

>>1613022
samefag, alcohol and/or weed helps a lot but obviously it’s dangerous to become dependent on that, I don’t want to have to be under the influence all the time just to act like a normal person. I have no idea how to change my mindset around social situations.

No. 1613135

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>>1613027
NTA but this post inspired me to go on a little blog kind of relating to this. At 18 I discovered that substances strangely make me act/feel NT and i sort of ruined my life in the pursuit of feeling normal. I got addicted to feeling a sense of belonging and acceptance and went way overboard with the substance use, which led me to throwing out my education and career plans so I can spend more time with “friends”. It sounds pathetic but I literally became a drug addict so I could be liked, especially by men (I had a weird fixation on drug dealers). I went from adderall to ecstasy to benzos to opiates. When I landed at heroin I got stuck there, which is pretty cliche but it happened. I’m clean from hard drugs 6 years now and even quit weed last month. I only had one other (diagnosed) autistic friend who did drugs but he was a moid and he ended up ODing and died. I feel kind of isolated in my trauma because almost every other autistic woman I know has a good head on her shoulders and would never do drugs harder than weed. I’m way past it now but still feel a lot of shame in my stupidity and desperation, especially since I now look at the people I tried to impress with disgust and hatred

No. 1613164

>>1613027
Does weed actually help though? I take 0,50 of Neuryl at morning and 0,50 at night and my psychiatrist (who is really against weed lmao) said that smoking either duplicates the effect of the med or eliminates it completely. So what should I believe?

No. 1613218

>>1613164
weed is my best friend.

No. 1613229

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I couldn't socialize with other kids and I was often in therapy as a kid. Now I'm in my late 20s and I'm cleaning some stuff and I found some old papers collected by my mother, and I found out the psychiatrist actually diagnosed me with schizotypal personality disorder when I was 13. All this time I thought I was only diagnosed with anxiety. Can you even diagnose SPD in a 13 year old? Also, throughout all my teens I heard that I don't have a proper diagnosis and everything is unclear for them and they will have to diagnose me after my 18th birthday. I did some tests after my 18th birthday, there was like 200 questions, and then the same psychiatrist who "diagnosed" me with SPD analyzed those tests and she told me the results were too contradictory and that means I wasn't honest while replying and I didn't cooperate????? I was so tired at this point, after years
of useless treatment, and I wanted to know what's "wrong" with me, and this woman basically accused me of lying. Now, after like 6 years of not being in therapy and zero contact with the psychiatry, I started therapy with a therapist I found on my own and she tells me she's basically sure I'm on the spectrum, an aspie to be precise (but now it's also in the spectrum anyway). She worked with diagnosed autists btw. So what the fuck??? When reading about both autism and SPD, the first one fits way more to me. Not just problems with communication, but sensory issues, problems with coordination, stimming, even "T rex" hands that I make unawarely and I only found out I'm holding my hands like this because my coworker was mocking me for it and I consulted it with my therapist and she told me it's about muscle tension. If I'm indeed an autist, and I think I am, how could no one notice that, despite being in therapy since I was 11, and being seen by like 3 different psychiatrists? I live in an eastern european country so maybe we were even more backwards when it comes to autism diagnosis in girls than the west, idk. But I was still seen
when I was 18-20. I always had sensory issues but nobody EVER asked me about those things when I was a kid, or when I was 18, so I never talked about them. I'm so confused

No. 1613292

>>1613229
I don't relate with anything you said but only with the fact that some therapists tend to overlook or even ignore some symptoms when you are a teenager, because most of the issue with girls is reduced to "oh it's the hormones!"
Some of the things I told my first psychiatrist were that I have a lot of problems with hearing, that I don't have friends because I can't socialize and students bullied me 24/7 for things I couldn't understand, and that I forget the faces of literally everybody -even my family members- the second I stop looking at them (as of right now, if I had to picture my face in my own mind, nothing comes up, so once in a while, I go to the mirror the remember how I look like)
He brushed off all of that. Didn't ask me to elaborate, no nothing. Just went "oh, I see" and proceeded to tell me I had social anxiety.

The second therapist I went to told me I was Aspie. But maybe the second one is wrong and maybe I DO have social anxiety, but then what the fuck is up with the other stuff?

Anyway, good luck with your things nona.I'm sure something will come out of it

No. 1613302

>>1607960
the show is actually incredibly woke and pro trans, a lot of the time it's beating you over the head with shit it feels more like a lecture, they do cover shit that's actually important too like racism, misogyny and medical misogyny in it but they could do with being more subtle. He eventually accepts the mtf and in another episode they have a pregnant gay trans man. I mentioned the pedo story line they had somewhere in this thread too. I agree that the hatred is largely because of his "transphobia" tho, they can't even accept a storyline that in the end is supposed to be about someone learning to accept trannies bc he dared to not be fully on board at first. The other part of their hatred for this show is that it shows negative aspects of being a sperg and the self identified tards like to pretend those don't exist.

>>1611747
why do they all have twitter? I don't get it, literally everyone seems to need to be on there, it's not like you can have a good discussion about anything there anyway. Politicians, scientists, authors, and every fucking company being quirky and relatable, i hate it.

>>1613135
i have my own issues with drug abuse and the autistic women i know do too, i think we're all just pretty quiet about it. I would never suspect they had issues with drugs too because they seemed to have their shit together much more than me, but it's probably a lot more common than you think. We all look for ways to cope somehow, i used opiates during my time in uni because the whole thing was overwhelming for me.

No. 1613482

>>1613135
I've heard autists get addicted easier and getting sober is harder because we have hyperfocus brains that won't let things go. If you got out you did really well nona.

I'm one of those autist drug-prudes who don't even drink energy drinks kek I feel like my brain is already messed up enough, I'm not going to make it worse on purpose by taking drugs.

No. 1613485

>>1613302
>i have my own issues with drug abuse and the autistic women i know do too, i think we're all just pretty quiet about it.
Samefagging from >>1613482 but for aspies around me it's the opposite, none of us have ever touched drugs, most of us don't even drink alcohol even though it's fully accepted and even expected here. But my crowd is mostly the "nerdy science autists" so idk if other groups are different.

No. 1613507

two things id like to ask you kind anons

does taking too much adderall/ritalin make you sweat profusely

have you noticed early/longer lasting periods on these meds
if you have any other strange side effects im also interested to know. i consider light jaw grinding, tongue clicking, and faster speaking to be my main "normal" side effects.

No. 1613510

>>1613229
i got diagnosed avoidant personality at 13. i dont think it can even be diagnosed before 18 but this is where they fuck us up, young teen brains ARE insane and usually level out after 21. so imagine being an insecure identity confused kid being told you ARE this list of symptoms, you end up geeking yourself out until you fit the diagnosis

No. 1613956

>>1613485
ayrt i'm a nerdy science autist too, that's probably why no one would guess i use drugs, i just can't cope with sensory overload and opiates made it easier to deal with shit, i don't drink though because i'd end up an alcoholic, i get addicted to things often enough though, i usually manage to quit…except the nicotine, used it to help me focus in uni and now i can't quit. I used to be against drugs and alcohol when i was younger too but life sucks and i can't cope.

No. 1614115

Has anyone here tried receiving an ASD diagnosis through a private clinician, out-of-pocket? I am almost certain I have ASD (many reasons, won't list them all out) but I have been reading about the consequences of receiving a diagnosis, such as limited immigration opportunities, custody/adoption restrictions, insurance companies either won't accept your application or hike up the premium, etc. etc.
I don't believe I need any accommodations for my condition, the diagnosis would be more so for my own knowledge.

No. 1614396

>>1614115
>I don't believe I need any accommodations for my condition, the diagnosis would be more so for my own knowledge.
I'm gonna be honest, it's a complete waste of time and money nona. To actually qualify for a diagnosis you need to be "suffering" from it, and this is true for all conditions not just autism. If you're fully capable of walking without a problem and don't need a wheelchair, no respectable medical provider would approve you to get one. Even if you were born without a foot and have to wear a prosthetic leg to walk, getting a wheelchair would still be silly. Getting an autism diagnosis just because you feel a few not-bothersome traits match you is equally silly.
However, if you went to a private medical provider saying "if you think I could get a wheelchair I will buy it from you for a lot of money" they will most likely sell it to you, because they can and you'll just be a happy client with a shiny new wheelchair. Or diagnosis in your case.

You're already aware of several downsides of having a diagnosis and you're clearly already aware of whatever traits you have you think match autism. You're fully capable of accommodating those needs by yourself. There is literally nothing for you to gain. You don't need a dumb ass label (or to be denied one) to know yourself, you just need to know how YOU function and how to deal with it. And you already know that!

No. 1614423

>>1614396
I suppose you're right—my mother has been saying the same thing dissuading me from a diagnosis such that I don't get labelled. I'm just a curious type of person who likes to know the "why" behind everything.

No. 1614444

>>1614115
Is it possible to ask the clinician to diagnose you but not record it down in your records?

No. 1614450

>>1614444
Yeah that would be the reason for going to a private clinician and paying out-of-pocket. If you do it under insurance they will find out

No. 1614728

>>1614423
>I'm just a curious type of person who likes to know the "why" behind everything.
I think it's a mistake (by people in general, not saying it's just you) to think a diagnosis even explains the "why".

For example, let's say you have 2 common autistic sensory issues: one is with clothes, most of them hurt your skin and you can only wear a specific really soft kind of clothes without being in severe discomfort and pain. The second sensory issue is bright lights, you can't stand it and the specific lights make you unable to focus. Then one day you get diagnosed with autism and you finally have an explaination to why you were so overly sensitive to those things! It doesn't take away the sensory issues, but having an explaination makes you feel a bit more secure in yourself. For years you do your best to deal with them, with varying results. Then one day you go to the optician to get sunglasses to protect you from the bright lights that so bother you. They notice something is off with your eyes, and it turns out you have an eye disease that gets worse from UV light. Luckily there's a surgery to help it, you just have to see a doctor. The next day you meet a doctor and you mention your skin is overly sensitive. The doctor makes you do a test, turns out you've been allergic to synthetic fibres all along and that's why you couldn't stand most clothes. So in the end neither of your sensory issues came from having autism, and could actually be treated, so your suffered for many extra years because you already had your "why" explaination.

Now this could be the case for every single of your autistic symptoms. What if your eyes really were sensitive from autism, but your skin issue really was an allergy. Or the other way around. How would you know? The person who diagnosed you just checked the "sensory issues" box and took it as a sign of autism.
What if your slightly sheltered upbringing made you feel like your social skills don't match that of your peers? What if you have a mild case of dyslexia that neither you nor anyone else ever spotted and that made it extrememly hard to focus in school and made you feel like an outcast? What if you're naturally smart and love to read, and as a result there's a clear gap between you and your peers when it comes to knowledge and intelligence where you're way above them? What if your parents not being native speakers of English led to you having difficulties in detecting sarcasm because their and your native language doesn't have it? What if you watched so much tiktok or youtube that you became so convinced you have difficulties you didn't have that you actually developed some of them for real? What if you have another disorder entirely? What if that childhood event that "wasn't that big of a deal" but you still remember it often actually did give you some lasting trauma?

Nothing listed negates having autism on its own. But treating a diagnosis as an explaination when it comes to a very uneven condition frequently called a "spectrum" has been a mistake from the start. And it's only getting worse the more they broaden the diagnosis criteria. You still won't actually know anything new.

No. 1615001

>>1614728
Thanks for the response.

You've raised many valid points, though a fraction of me remains unconvinced. I still feel like a diagnosis—or even a sort of impression from a psychiatrist—would at least provide me some closure, but you're right in that a diagnosis won't change anything. I think in my personal understanding, it is most likely I have ASD and a diagnosis isn't like a magic potion which instantaneously infuses autism into my blood the moment at which I drink it.

I thought this point
>And it's only getting worse the more they broaden the diagnosis criteria.
was very interesting and very true from what I've read. When I was very young they said I had PDD-NOS and then they undiagnosed me (I do not know the specifics behind this.). I read on Reddit that they now absorb it into the ASD diagnosis. I think maybe it was a good idea that my parents did not pursue for me to have an ASD label when I was a child.

No. 1616698

I hate being autistic, I hate having no situational awareness, I hate my monotone voice, I hate how disconnected I feel from people and my surroundings.

No. 1617132

>>1616698
Study those things you wish you had nona.
For example you can learn how to make your voice not sound so monotone. I'm assuming you can tell what is and isn't monotone since you're complaining about it. You can try to copy the speech patterns of someone whose voice you like, like a youtuber. Watch their videos and try to copy what they're saying. Maybe use your phone to record yourself saying it and then play it back and see how you compare and if you can match it closer to how they said it in the videos. By studying it by doing it you will get to understand when and where they put emphasis on words and can start to mimic that pattern when you speak.

What can you do to increase situational awareness and being aware of your surroundings? Cognitive behaviour therapy with a pro might help you the most, but on your own you can do things like sit at a public place and people watch. Get used to considering what people around you are doing and try to figure out why. Doesn't matter if you're wrong, they're strangers so you'll never know for real, but make up your own plausible reasons based on what they're doing. For example, a lady walks past you at a very quick pace - perhaps she is late for a meeting. She is also holding a coffee - perhaps she overslept and is now both tired and late, and grabbed a quick coffee to perch her up before hurrying off to work. Train yourself to make little observations like that and eventually they'll come more naturally as you train yourself to observe people and consider their actions. Doesn't matter if they're correct observations or not, as long as they seem plausible to you. If you feel comfortable doing so you could tell a friend or family member to come with you to help you work on it, most people seem to enjoy some people watching and are happy to help and "gossip" about people around them.

No. 1617215

>>1617132
thank you for the advice nonny, I commented that after I got a warning at my job for complaints of me not being cheerful enough from customers. I got way more emotional than I should’ve because it felt like an issue with me as a person more than an issue with my job performance. But you’re right, I really just need to put more effort into masking and learning how to mask properly.

No. 1617222

Did any of yall nonnas have signs of being autistic when you were children or babies? I have a 9 month old daughter and my husband is slightly autistic imo (enjoys solitude, loves his routine, sometimes repeats single words or phrases a lot bc they sound funny etc.) and I'm starting to think she might be as well? She was always a very "good" baby. She almost never cries, and mostly just sits around and observes stuff. Since birth basically. She does make eye contact though, but never for too long.

No. 1617230

>>1617222
Signs of autism in early childhood is a requirement for the diagnosis.

No. 1617340

>>1617132
This actually works,when I was really young the school kids laughed at me because I used to walk with my head down and with both arms basically glued to the sides. I really didn't paid attention since kids always found a reason to bother my dumbass, but when my mom told me that I walked strange I took it more seriously and started to "study" how girls walked and to this day I use that way of walking, sometimes I see my reflection in a store and catch myself walking rather normal and I think - wow you can't even tell I used to walk like a penguin when I was a kid! And same goes with talking, but in my case what helped me was learning English as a kid, I picked up the language really fast and therefore the accent, and that stuck with me for some reason. Nowadays I'm also more aware of the fact that I speak in a weird way and with weird words, my mom says that I speak in my own accent, so that's better than nothing I guess kek

No. 1617821

>>1617215
>I really just need to put more effort into masking and learning how to mask properly.
Don't see it as masking and "having" to mask, you want to train yourself to learn these things for your own sake to ease your own life. Masking is more of a charade to pretend to be more normal than you are, what you want to do is to actually learn skills to be more observant or to use your voice in a different way, but a way that is still authentic to you.

No. 1617823

>>1617222
It will probably be easier to tell once she's a bit older. Just love her as she is and don't worry until you see signs of actual problems, no reason to worry over her having autistic traits if in the end all they really did was make her an enjoyer of solitude and liking routines you know?

No. 1617824

>>1617340
This is really how everyone learns, we autists are just not as good as doing it subconsciously or may need to have someone else point out what we did that isn't "normal" to begin with because we can't spot it as easily

No. 1618087

>>1617222
Yes, and my mother said I was also an easy baby but then casually mentions I was difficult/"strange" about sensory stuff even at that age (sounds, smells, textures of baby blankets, etc). I'm an aspie fwiw and my father is also an aspie. It's hereditary, but it's not always passed down, like any genetic condition is.

No. 1618423

>>1613218
well since you mentioned it, how much does the "effect" of the weed last on you? I've read it last for a few hours but I'm willing to try to see if I can be different when I'm outside.

I don't know if this happens to everybody but I feel like I'm not in control of myself or what I say when I'm interacting with people.I laugh, I smile, and do things automatically, and inside I'm thinking "I'm not like this, why I'm I behaving this way? This is not me"
but I don't know how to change that.

No. 1618426

>>1618423
Nobody behaves "like themselves" around other people. It is instinctual to change your behaviour when not alone.

Don't do drugs.

No. 1620166

Autist nonas a lot of people come in asking "am I/is this thing autistic" but I would like to flip it to the other side:
>what are signs someone is NOT autistic?
It can be someone faking it on purpose, someone who's been misdiagnosed or someone who just thinks they might have it because they share a trait or two. What are our autist opinions and observations?

No. 1620167

>>1620166
Personally, I think some sociopaths are misdiagnosed as autists.

No. 1620196

>>1620167
could you explain more nona?

No. 1620527

>>1620166
Making tiktoks about their stims and how it's ~cute~, really just glorifying autism. Extra points putting on e-girl/goth make up and outfits. Tiktok in general was a mistake. Like that whole stuttering and tourettes shit

No. 1620620

>>1620166
People who have BPD (or other cluster B traits), people who use it like an identity/label/defense in an argument for any reason, anyone who posts on tiktok or makes videos on youtube and claims to have it.

No. 1620966

>>1620166
>what are signs someone is NOT autistic?
>>1620527
>>1620620
>Making tiktoks about their stims and how it's ~cute~
>anyone who posts on tiktok or makes videos on youtube and claims to have it.
I agree with these 2, with a VERY occasional exception for youtubers. I used to watch a girl called Anja Melissa (she sadly removed them all recently) who made realistic videos about aspergers and autism and the first good sign was that she used the label aspergers. I actually count that as a red flag - no real autist/sperg is offended by the term aspergers, it's always just been the chronically online fakers who took offense.

So to list all red flags I can think of right now:
>thinking aspergers is a bad term
>having social media featuring their supposed autism
>posting their "stims" online
>calling themselves a spokesperson of autism
>their "special interest" list is suspiciously long and contains things they seemingly rarely even engage with
>magically getting autistic traits overnight the second they get a diagnosis/self-diagnosis a la simplykenna/cozykitsune
>"I'm autistic but don't really need any support" sorry to certain nonas kek
>having a long list of other mental conditions and illnesses
>not acting autistic at all, none of us can mask THAT well and we know it
>being offended if someone thinks they're not autistic
>they agree with ALL typical "correct" autism opinions online without fail

I need to talk more about the last point because that is SUCH a red flag to me! In real life the autists I know all have pretty strong opinions and aren't afraid to be accidentally controversial, even the softest most doormat people pleasing autistic girls I've known have had this trait. And we typically don't infight about it either because we sort of lack the social awareness to think disagreement means we are no longer on good terms (which is how people act online). We are stubborn and think what we think, and it doesn't ever 100% line up with what you're "supposed" to think. For example I mean things like "aspergers is a nazi term", "only an autist can play autistic acting roles", "self-diagnosis is good and valid", "troons and gender are real", "autism speaks are bad", "ABA therapy is always bad", "wanting to erase autism is evil" etc. It seems every faker online agrees with all those points because they've seen on social media that those are the correct opinions to have. But irl most of the autists I know are against several or most of them and will challenge the narrative of the claims.

No. 1620987

>>1620966
>>posting their "stims" online
I don't notice when I stim it's just something I do unintentionally. I'm a little suspicious of people who sets a camera up, wait til the feel the need to stim, and then record themselves stimming. I also don't get people who watch stim videos what do they they out of it? I know visual stim is a thing but personally for me it's more about things thats cordniated and feels "satisfying" to look at. Hand flips and chewing stuff looks very chaotic and while I do both things when I stim I can't understand the appeal of looking at others do it
>their "special interest" list is suspiciously long and contains things they seemingly rarely even engage with
I think it's a red flag when you meet someone who puts too much empathis on special interests and hyperfixation. All the autists I know irl rarely talk about those symptoms (and tbh I don't even know what the difference is between them). When we talk about autism we usually talk about how it affects our social lives, how it makes it hard for us to understand instructions, or how it can make us being too obsessive with following instructions too a tee where we end up doing something wrong because we took it to literally, how upset we get when our routines are broken or our enverement change, etc. we never define ourself after our special interest.
Much like stimming, special interest is a symptom I don't even notice. Lack of self awareness is a part of autism and it usually plays into my interests as well. One time I spend one whole hour just talking uninterrupted about a play I like and all the different actors who has been in it and how it has affected their careers, and also talk about the costumes and how they have changed over the years. It was only when my dad asked me "how do you know all this stuff" I realised that the play might be a special interest.
My point is if you meet someone who says "my special interest is trains" and someone who unpromptely starts talking about trains with so much enthusiasm that they lose self awareness then it's pretty easy to figure who has autism.

No. 1621014

>>1620966
I agree with your list. Another thing I’d add is just having a track record for being an attention seeker or trend-hopper. I know a girl who is well known for histrionics, like literally has posted pics of herself crying while naked on Facebook, on and off again anachan, I could go on but you get the picture. She recently self diagnosed and has been posting about it in a really annoying like wannabe edgy/funny way. Sometimes the things she does are so obviously annoying that it does seem a bit autistic, but it’s really a lack of social awareness and that’s it. She even posted that she put in her tinder bio that she wants to date an autistic man. Like?? I wanted to dm her and be like no babe you don’t want that and you also don’t want to advertise that you’re autistic on tinder knowing men will try to take advantage of that (if you actually were autistic). I think people like this do have mental issues like narcissism or bpd but it really doesn’t seem like autism.

Also your last paragraph is every “autist” on Reddit hehe. They all feel sooo strongly about AutismSpeaks and parrot the same shit over and over. I have been saying we need more gatekeeping kek

No. 1621020

>>1620966
Thank you for compiling this list nonna!

No. 1621063

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Anyone else feel like that they become less effected by their autism as time goes on? I was diagnosed as a kid and I still stim, sometimes speak too loudly, admittedly struggle a little in maintaining friendships and pace around my house talking to myself, but aside from that I don’t think my autism ‘disables’ me or makes things more difficult. Though it’s difficult to gauge if some of this stuff is due to autism since I don’t really have any other reference, so it’s possible that it’s still effecting me in other ways without me knowing that there’s a relationship between the two.

When I read about autistic people talking about certain symptoms like struggle to follow non-direct instructions, talking about their ‘special interest’ etc, it’s what I was like when I was a kid, but I don’t think I struggle with those things anymore, at least not as much

No. 1621078

>>1620987
>I think it's a red flag when you meet someone who puts too much empathis on special interests and hyperfixation. All the autists I know irl rarely talk about those symptoms (and tbh I don't even know what the difference is between them).
This. Listing your special interests on social media always felt so performative to me, but even moreso with the new autism activist types. Their special interests always sound like the blandest things someone would make up when trying really hard to come up with a special interest, like "putting on make-up" or "movies" and they don't seem too invested in them, either, like they say their special interest is movies but then they watch like one movie a month and never talk about anything related to film. As if normies don't have hobbies at all.

Also it seems like such a kid thing to call it a special interest, because doesn't everyone have things they're passionate about? What used to be called my special interest actually became my career, and to call it a special interest would be so infantilizing, like imagine going to a conference and announcing to my colleagues that this is my special interest kek

No. 1621107

Does anybody else suspect they were misdiagnosed as autistic? I don't feel autistic. I don't think I'm unable to understand social cues. If anything I've just got some emotional issue.
How would I even know?

No. 1621205

>>1621107
Recognizing social cues is just a part of it. Here’s some diagnostic criteria you can look at and see if it still sounds like you don’t fit most of this.

https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/autism/hcp-dsm.html

No. 1621258

>>1620987
>One time I spend one whole hour just talking uninterrupted about a play I like and all the different actors who has been in it and how it has affected their careers, and also talk about the costumes and how they have changed over the years
Nona this sounds fun, i'd listen to you sperg about plays any day
>My point is if you meet someone who says "my special interest is trains" and someone who unpromptely starts talking about trains with so much enthusiasm that they lose self awareness then it's pretty easy to figure who has autism.
Well put, I see exactly this on the internet a lot. Obviously I can't know their every thought during a given day and only know what they do post, but you have people like pixilocks who says her special intrests are a LONG list of different things she likes, some of which she never even talks about or brings up. I'm sure she does like those things but they're literally just her interests and it's clear she doesn't understand the autistic meaning of a special interest or hyperfixation.

>>1620966
>having social media featuring their supposed autism
One thing I just thought of is that a lot of my autist friends simply do not use social media at all. Several didn't even care to get smartphones until their family literally forced them to a year or two ago (I even remember being really sceptic about getting one myself as a teen and still wish my phone was less advanced), they have so little interest in social communication that they barely remember to carry a phone. So I see it as a "green flag" for autism when an autist is inept when it comes to social media or having an interest in it kek

No. 1621263

>>1621014
>Another thing I’d add is just having a track record for being an attention seeker or trend-hopper.
It's so odd to me that this point is overlooked so often when it comes to internet "disorders" in general. If even us socially retarded autists can tell they're just trenders jumping from one thing to the next and collecting lables like they were pokemon then why can't normal people?

A funny thing I've noticed is that like 50% of autistic females have pokemon as a genuine special interest. Myself included lmao
Well, I do run in those circles so of course I would find more fellow pokemon-autists. But still! There are SO many of us!

No. 1621488

To add to the topic of everyone diagnosing themselves, I wish people would start considering other factors such as being sheltered, simply spending too much time online and not having enough interactions irl, other disorders, the way their parents raised them, etc. for the way they behave instead of just fucking jumping to the conclusion of autism. Like honey, you’re not autistic because you’re socially awkward. All the bpdchans in my town constantly share/make posts about MuH aUtIsM…. Like everyone else has said already, it’s become a label you can use to excuse your behavior. If those same people were to meet a real autismo they would certainly get frustrated and impatient with them and think they’re weird because it’s not something that’s as quirky as they make it out to be.

No. 1621508

>>1620966
This is a nice list! I really couldn't think of a single thing to add, maybe like the fact that they infantilize themselves.
>>1621488
It definitely seems like bpd chans desperately clamour for an excuse for their awful behaviour.
>>1620196
Nta, but it can be confused by normies if the sociopathic individual makes attempts to correct their own behaviour. The difference is that an autist's may disregard or misunderstands other people's feelings on accident, whilst a sociopath knows how people feel, but they just don't care or react.

No. 1621555

>>1621263
I had a friend who was a huge trend follower on social media, totally swayed by whatever algorithm was thrown at her from each website she used the most at the time. By the time of her unfortunate death from jumping on the Munchausen's train, she claimed she was autistic, ADHD, anorexic, nonbinary, a spoonie, and had some rare immune disorder.
I remember a lot of this started on Tumblr, then jumped to Reddit, Vine, Instagram, Twitter, and then ultimately Facebook.
She was nowhere near what someone would call autistic. There was no one thing she hyperfocus on, it was all just trends she would go to extremes for.

No. 1621577

>>1621258
>literally forced to get a phone
I didn't realize this was a thing. It frustrates everyone around me that I constantly just forget my phone exists, kek. I hate having to use it so much.

I actually wanted to bring up if any other autists in this thread have trouble with muteness? I'm always hearing that other autists can go on and on about certain topics they love, but I'm honestly so bad at talking that I can't even do that. I don't know how to explain it, but it's like the words won't come out of my mouth or my mind goes blank after I say a sentence or two. I'm much better at speaking through text, but everyone around me hates it. Depressing.

No. 1621880

>>1621577
>I actually wanted to bring up if any other autists in this thread have trouble with muteness?
I don't think it's so bad for me I'd actually qualify as a mute/selective mute, but a lot of the time I struggle really badly with talking. I've always just called it being shy or being an introvert because it seems more "reasonable" to call it that for myself but I think it must be related to what makes other autists mute, just a "light" version.

No. 1622063

>>1620966
>"I'm autistic but don't really need any support"
This probably referred to one of my earlier posts >>1614115
I don't disagree with your post, but I'm only writing this more as a vent about this generation and their idea that everyone should get "help" for their mental problems, despite the regular abuses that disabled people/people who aren't considered "normal" face because stuff like that will go onto your record and give society a reason not to treat you as a fully grown adult. As my parent comes from the Third World, I grew up with a negative perception of autism/mental health, so it's not like something I'd be proud of saying to people. I do think I need "support", but not enough to risk losing any of my rights because of a label (and I hate talking about my emotions because it grosses me out). I don't want to lose out on a position someplace important because they think I'm a liability. I'm not bashing my head against the wall so hard that my retinae have detached completely, so I think I'll be okay without help. I only believe it's autism because there is a precedent in my immediate family and in my own medical records, that I have virtually every "symptom", and because I am female it might be less obvious than in my male relatives. If anything and no offense to anyone I would much rather have social anxiety/agoraphobia or whatever than to be called an autist (the next closest thing to being called retarded), and I've denied it much longer than I have accepted it as a possibility/probability. There's no advantage to being an autistic adult—other than as a way to make money if you're a grifting "e-celeb" faker—or having inordinate knowledge about boats/naval architecture

Sorry if I come off defensive or if this came out really long, y'all can tell me if you feel I'm not autistic, I just don't want to be lumped in with a bunch of first world TikTok dangerhairs who just collect labels because they're ashamed of being white/straight/[insert here]

No. 1622098

>>1621078
>because doesn't everyone have things they're passionate about?
No, not always. Many normies don't have any hobbies, especially if they have a job and work many hours. In any case having a hobby doesn't indicate having a passion for something. There's a distinction, for example, between a hobbyist dancer and a professional dancer, and a distinction still between liking something vs. making it a hobby vs. being passionate about it

No. 1622116

>>1622063
>this generation and their idea that everyone should get "help" for their mental problems, despite the regular abuses that disabled people/people who aren't considered "normal" face because stuff like that will go onto your record and give society a reason not to treat you as a fully grown adult.
>I do think I need "support", but not enough to risk losing any of my rights because of a label
>>1614115
>I don't believe I need any accommodations for my condition, the diagnosis would be more so for my own knowledge.
>>1614423
>I'm just a curious type of person who likes to know the "why" behind everything.
So to summarize, you went from thinking you didn't need any accommodations to now thinking you need it but it isn't worth it because you'd get a permanent label. I'm what I consider to be on the side of the most high-functioning kind of autist and I still can't afford to not have any accommodations or my life quality would suffer, and greatly so. Yet I'm so high-functioning that I would accept it if the diagnosis was redefined to kick me out of the label and strip me of my support. I'd suffer for it, but autism is defined as a certain level of severity of symptoms for it to be considered autism (like a fat person isn't automatically obese, but an obese person will always be fat. Autistic traits don't mean it's autism, but autists will always have autistic traits). My parents both have autistic traits which genetically literally lead to obvious diagnose-able autism in their children, and thus IS autism in it's purest hereditary form, but neither of them ARE autistic. Despite having the literal genes for it and light traits caused by it.

>Sorry if I come off defensive or if this came out really long, y'all can tell me if you feel I'm not autistic, I just don't want to be lumped in with a bunch of first world TikTok dangerhairs who just collect labels because they're ashamed of being white/straight/[insert here]

I'm not trying to say you are like them at all nona. I think you have genuine concerns about yourself and your own well-being. But if you do not need help and can afford to be without it you may not be on the spectrum, but outside it.

No. 1622232

>>1622116
This is probably very long but you had many interesting points that I wanted to address. Some of what I have written is new info, but I am trying to keep at a distance.

>you went from thinking you didn't need any accommodations to now thinking you need it but it isn't worth it because you'd get a permanent label.

No, this was not at all my thought process, I just will not write down every bit and detail of my machinations on this website.

>I consider to be on the side of the most high-functioning kind of autist and I still can't afford to not have any accommodations or my life quality would suffer, and greatly so.

You and I are two different people. Again, my parent comes from the Third World, so it may be that I am biased to hardship. I don't use the word "suffering" or any other emotional descriptor because I do not like to reveal nor describe my emotions, so you'll never read anything from me which states that I am suffering. As a compromise, I do maintain that I think my condition complicates aspects of my life and career. But I am reluctant to receive support from outside my family, so generally I am not looking for it.

>like a fat person isn't automatically obese, but an obese person will always be fat

This is not a good analogy, as there is no clinical definition for what a "fat" person is. By the most conventional definition, a fat person is synonymous with a clinically obese person (it's not a high threshold to surpass). "Autistic traits", meanwhile, have a more robust (if not quite definite, given the nature of human behavior) meaning. BTW this didn't really have anything to do with the convo, I was compelled to address this part as a logical fallacy

>My parents both have autistic traits

As do my own.

>if you do not need help and can afford to be without it you may not be on the spectrum, but outside it.

It's not so black-and-white, hence why it is called a spectrum. Someone eschewing healthcare does not preclude them from needing it. A very close relative of mine has diagnosed autism and does not receive any treatment for it. They now work as a medical professional and earn about six figures. Plenty of people with autism are in graduate studies or work within the professional realm and do not actively engage with therapy (their experiences do not preclude still the legal and social prejudices with which autists are burdened). Thousands of women and ethnic minorities are undiagnosed autists because doctors could not/cannot shed their subconscious biases of what it means to be autistic (they think it's just for white boys), are they not autistic because some of them may not be receiving support for a condition which they do not know that they have? On the other hand, if an autistic someone who has received treatment felt traumatized by their experience, does their later condition of refusing further treatment disqualify them from being on the spectrum (i.e., were they misdiagnosed)?

I am endeavoring to remain brief and scant of too many details (hence relative and absence of gendered pronouns, among other things), but I didn't just decide one day that I might be autistic instead of socially inept; it came out of a medical precedent of which I was unaware until very recently—at which point I started putting things together about my own idiosyncrasies from my early childhood through the present, my close relatives, and so forth. At length, it's not like anyone here knows me, so it would be fruitless to discuss whether or not I (personally) am autistic (the initial request was for experiences with private clinicians from whom to receive a diagnosis)—but many of these generalizations are much more nuanced, in reality. I do not take it as an affront, but it's just a misconception that all autistic people "do this or do that".

No. 1622298

if you saw me delete and repost this 30 times no you didnt
>>1622232
Samefag. I will note that I initially said I didn't think I needed treatment but wrote
>Someone eschewing healthcare does not preclude them from needing it
I was speaking in a more abstract (general) sense but I think the implication that it applies to me is still there. To clear this up, I don't believe that I need help, as I am high functioning, but at the same time if "support" and "accommodations" would make my life a lot better, then I possibly do "need" them. But if getting "support" means that I have my rights taken away, then I would rather endure a little bit of "suffering" in order to keep them. A life without liberty is far worse than that of "suffering" in silence. As long as I'm not head banging myself into a TBI, I think I'm good. Those kinds of people do actually need the label kek

No. 1622350

>>1622298
I saw it kek
nta but if you DO have autism, the private diagnosis route is a good idea since it won't go on records (if you really want to be sure) and it means that you can get better care in therapy. I went with a private doc because of really bad experiences with public healthcare and I also didn't want it on records because of insurance. And in a way I wish I knew of this earlier, because I feel like my previous counseling sessions would've gone so much better if they knew I was possibly a sperg. I remember talking about how I wasn't normal and I didn't feel 'normal', how I never felt 'normal' and how much I wanted to be 'normal' and the therapist just spewed the "everyone is different" jargon and I ultimately didn't feel helped at all and eventually quit. And in a way, unlike some nonas saying that a proper diagnosis is useless, I'm in a country that treats mental health like shit and imagine rolling up to a therapist and saying "I am self diagnosed with autism" and expect to be taken super seriously especially with all the tiktok self diagnosed autism/adhd teens out there lmao

Speaking of which I'm this anon >>1609928 with a small update, doc said seems pretty set that I'm on the spectrum, but she needs time to compile the full report. I was pretty surprised when she told me at the end of the session because I felt neurotypical as fuck when she did some tests or talked to me like:
>I pointed out the facial expressions of the animal characters when she asked me to read a picture book
>I used gestures while explaining how to use an imaginary product
>I managed to tell a story with a bunch of toys (although after a lot of struggling), but wasn't really imaginative with them (like treating a car as a car, not anything else)
She made a pretty big deal about pointing out facial expressions in that book and that I could explain my emotions well so I was kind of under the impression that I was giving pretty neurotypical answers? She started writing down stuff pretty aggressively when I answered "What does feeling happy feel like?" with "How happy are we talking about?". I hope she'll explain what she saw in me in the report, I'm so goddamn lost

No. 1622476

Do y’all drive? How?? I’ve spent the past 10 years trying to figure it out but my brain gets too overstimulated and it makes me want to cry. I took a 2 hour lesson today and it was so horrible the whole time I was screaming internally. I want to get my license this year as a bucket list thing but this is one of the aspects of autism that makes me feel actually disabled. This shit sucks.

No. 1622481

>>1622476
It's overwhelming for most conscientious people at first, it's a thousand+ pound metal snare. You will start to feel better after some practice. Anxiety when you first begin to drive is a good sign, at least you understand that being good at it is important. You'll ease into it. I know a couple autistic women that drive, one didn't get her license until she was almost thirty I believe. If it's overstimming you to a point where it can be potentially dangerous after you've been practicing for awhile, then it can pose problems. But most normal people feel panicked and overstimulated when they first begin driving.

No. 1622652

>>1622350
That's good to hear about your experiences. What was the cost for your evaluation? I think it might differ by region and country.
And does therapy help you now (if you're still in it)?

No. 1622693

>>1622481
thank you it does feel better to look at it that way. I’m also 5’ and even with seat adjusted as high as possible I can barely see and it makes it scarier. I’ve already failed a few tests which is why I gave up on it for years until recently. I want to be independent so badly. This is the only major challenge in my life that I’ve not been able to overcome and it feels so defeating since it’s something that’s like a basic part of life for most people

No. 1622727

>>1622693
There are tons of people who can't drive and don't intend to, but if you aren't in a walkable infrastructure it's really limiting. You just need practice and experience. It really won't take too long for you to get the hang of certain actions and apply it to muscle memory, once you get past the initial fear you become more confident and at ease so you don't overcorrect. You can see it as a handy tool you don't necessarily need and try to approach it as low-pressure as possible. I failed my first test from sheer nerves, it isnt out of question for you to be failing because your anxiety is causing you to overcorrect and make mistakes you wouldn't make after a bit of time with repetition. I'm not autistic but I think its generally true that autistic people can be really good with repetitive tasks, soon it will begin to feel really repetitive for you and you'll develop a sort of autopilot with your body response that will make it much easier for you to focus more on your surroundings so that you can easily be aware without becoming overstimmed or panicked.

No. 1622830

>>1622476
Most of my autistic peers do not drive, myself included. Don't know if I'll ever be able to drive but it would sure be useful. Then again I have no issues getting around without a car.

No. 1622992

>>1622652
My evaluation costed roughly $1.5k USD, which all things considered, is not too terrible. I saw this as my only chance, unlike others who go around shopping for second opinions. I quit therapy because it was getting costly to be paying a lot every other week, but it's nice knowing some answers, because it'd help so much the next time I can afford for therapy. I heard from a friend that there are specialized therapy and classes for autists to better read and understand emotions, which is something I kind of need honestly.

No. 1623533

Do autists struggle with cause and effect in general, and not just in social situations? Like reading behind the lines on how objects and tasks work? Bc my mom is the most obvious autist I know, I have no idea how she hasnt been diagnosed. And she doesnt understand that at all. Like she'll clean up something gross, then use that same cloth and water to clean the rest of the house. She doesnt understand that whatever gross thing is now mixed into the bucket, that isnt not magically clean now. Or doing landry and shoving it to the brim so the water doesnt even fully submerge it, bc its effective to do it all at once, not undertstanding the nuances behind that clothing+washing machince=/=clean clothing. Or when cooking, not understanding that things has to bee cooked through, bc she did cook it, the food was in the pan so it should be cooked….while not cooking it though.

I see it with friends who are autistic too. Down to the exact same things, like they have an inability to read behind the lines when doing tasks. So I was wondering if thats an overlooked symptom of autism? Bc its easy for people to see the social aspect, but one has to live pretty closely with an autist to see the other sides.

Also not meaning any offence, I think I have the tism too. Almost guaranteed with a mom that autistic. But I dont struggle with reading between the lines, and I've not seen anything info on this before, so Im just curios.

No. 1623583

>>1623533
Anon your mom doesn’t sound autistic at all she sounds retarded and gross. I’ve never known a functioning autist to be that gross but I know a lot of retarded NT people who act exactly like that.

No. 1623592

>>1623583
Kek same. My mother and nearly all the people from her generation that I know have those behaviours. Idk maybe it's the way they were brought up, people overall were a lot more gross and stupid back then. I wouldn't think of it as an autism thing.

No. 1623626

>>1623533
Sorry nona but your mom just sounds like a dumbass

No. 1623655

>>1612079
The interview was to see if I was a good candidate for a particular type of therapy. These doctors are connected to my psychiatric team (who I have a very long history with) and I know they will have discussed me with my psychiatrist before and looked at my notes. So I don't believe they will say something like that so flippantly. It might not actually be flippant to them and it could be the case that my autism diagnosis was queried and revoked years ago and I just don't know about that. That's a complete tinfoil though.

I have no idea how much of my interactions are learned. I know when I was a child/teenager I had no social skills and was extremely awkward but that also seems not so unusual for that age. But I could barely speak until I was finished being a teenager. I also was bullied very heavily at this time including by "friends" who would bully me under the guise of friendship and I was not able to recognize what that was until I was way older. I wasn't able to make actual friends until I was like 20 and it was with other "weird" people. But a lot of how I act around others seems like it comes very naturally to me, things like reciprocal smiling, catching someone's eye at the right time, sensing when someone is uncomfortable, intuitively knowing how someone else is feeling without them verbally expressing it. But even though this feels natural it does take a lot of energy and any social interaction always feels terrible to me. I guess my interactions with others have been somewhat limited though so maybe it's easy for me to just say this stuff. But definitely it has been said to me a lot that I'm warm and likeable and for example when I was inpatient in hospital for a long time I made a lot of friends to the point where the nurses said it was unusual and very nice to see. I know in deeper relationships when others have done something I didn't expect/prepare for like express a strong emotion (e.g. start crying) I really lose my mind and dissociate/can't speak for some time. I plan all social interactions and I wouldn't know how to act if it went off-script, although I'm confident that I would act in a completely socially acceptable way in any unpredicted situation (as long as it wasn't involving strong emotions). Again it seems opposite to autism in that I am completely comfortable with something like small talk but if I had to talk about something deep or that was important to me I would freak out.

>>1612153
I definitely wasn't assessed for trauma at the time of my diagnosis. My mother was present but it was more for questions about how I acted as a child with regard to stimming, eating issues, social issues and so on. Which of course I would score autistic based on those.

>>1612247
Thank you so much nona. I really appreciate the long answer.
>Genetics
There seems to be a genetic link as my father (undiagnosed) 100% is autistic and his father before him. But I wonder is it possible to absorb these traits through upbringing without having them developmentally. My mother's side doesn't have autism.
>ADHD/stimming
I do have (diagnosed) ADHD but like I'm not even sure if that's real either. I think it could be more like it seems I have it due to dissociation and various trauma things. I definitely don't have the hyperactive type. I stim like crazy though and often in "stereotypical" autistic ways (e.g. hand flapping) and I have done this ever since I remember and all the time. I don't think I've ever spent less than an hour a day on just stimming.
>Special interest
My main special interest is something from around age 7 that I will normally take part in for at least a few hours a day, maybe 5 hours is average. I feel basically suicidal if I don't do this every day but honestly I wouldn't say it brings me joy? I can't really imagine anything bringing me joy, kek. It's just something I have to do, I think it's important and I'm getting better at it. But I don't know if it's out of love for the thing itself. However my emotions are very cut off from me so maybe it's unconscious. I feel like it must be a lot more important to me than I'm aware of so I just keep going. Something I think might be important is that I know it's common with autism but I don't think I can imagine having a special interest that is something like a character from a media or something like that, for me it's more like an area of study. I have never been able to engage with media in that way and I don't normally read/watch tv/play games/etc and I don't really have any imagination in that way whereas this seems an important part of life to many autistic people.
>Overall
I really appreciate your opinion and I think it is very valuable for me. I have always thought of myself as possibly not autistic but I suppose it's weird to have a doctor mildly confirm that. Since I don't like to share much about myself normally it feels like a kind of shield to say I am autistic and that's where my issues come from, plus I like to have an explanation that makes sense to me and other people. So maybe I am just clinging to it. Trauma is a lot more difficult to explain and people don't understand it at all. Another thing is that for around ten years I have had a social worker through a charity for autistic people, she is extremely insistent that I have autism any time I talk to her about this. But that's just one person, and she hasn't worked with as many people with complicated trauma like my psychiatrist would have. Plus I think if you meet and get to know someone in a particular context (they're your autistic client) that can influence how you see them. I did notice that when I was trying to find professional help and went to several different types of professionals, they always tended to lean towards my issues being whatever the particular issue they specialized in was, kek. So I am probably just kind of malleable/suggestible or maybe that is how the medical industry works.

After reading over your posts and mine I think I can conclude I probably don't have autism since the social stuff seems so important and I really don't think I have notable social deficits besides what could reasonably occur from anxiety and trauma. Realistically a lot of my autistic traits could be from my autistic parenting. Or maybe I have very high functioning autism which is clearly not the core of my issues and I won't focus on it for now. I do think that could also explain why I was so terribly affected by and vulnerable to experiencing trauma. Sorry for shitting your thread but maybe this can be interesting or relatable to someone else. Thanks so much for all your help.

No. 1623724

>>1623533
Yeah I am gonna say thays just nasty behavior. My nigel grew up in a house like that, his parents house is nasty. Their washing machine smells like rancid eggs and rotting meat. We ended up with the same model and I had to remind him over and over and over to leave the door open or it molds. Didnt believe at first, then he went to visit and their washing machine could be smelled in every corner of the house. He had never noticed the smell before cuz that was normal to him kek. I also finally got him to understand that no, a washing machine also does not destroy every bit of foreign material on clothing, so stop putting entire chunky cat vomits stuck to a shirt which he left on the floor directly in the machine. He has come a long way now before I get dogpiled for dating a gross moid, his parents are filthy people and he didnt realize the extent and has worked to unlearn those behaviors. Im the autist of us and got so, so pissed when I found out he was using my kitchen cleaning rags to wash his ass in the shower…he thought it wasnt an issue as in it never crossed his mind bc it gets washed anyway….yuck. Washing machines cant get hot enough to kill e coli and other poop stuff. But no not an autistic thing, thats just gross human behavior. Btw, bleach expires. It degrades in light too. Switch out your cleaning solutions often to ensure effectiveness.

No. 1623735

>>1623724
Damn I don't understand how you could even stand to date someone so filthy. I would have given up on him a long time ago. But I mean, someone's gotta do it I suppose.

No. 1623937

>>1623626
kek i wanted to say the same thing. It reminds me of this other anon I saw once who assumed she hated soup, because her mom was a dumbass who didn't know how to make soup. Like, her mom would just put a bunch of ingredients in a pot and cover it with water and boil it, and then cry because the kids didn't like her "soup". Because to her, food + water + pot = soup, I guess.

No. 1624011

>>1622693
Unless you've got dyscalculia really really bad, I promise you can learn how to drive, it will just take a little longer. It took me much longer to 'learn' how to drive (ie not make any obvious mistakes, like mixing up the gas and break pedals or my left and right, etc), and I didn't pass my driving test twice. But I'm honestly the safest driver I know now. I think all of my NT friends are honestly much more reckless with how they drive, ADHD drivers are especially the worst imo.

No. 1625111

File: 1688551761224.png (97.23 KB, 228x275, 1531756525738.png)

Being openly autistic means dealing with a huge amount of stigma, but it also has certain advantages at the cost being treated quite poorly.

One of the reasons I do it, is normalfags will assume I'm naive and easy to manipulate. But trolling/deception is an autistic special interest of mine, I've been trolling since I was 12, was part of Anonymous during the 2000s, participated in meme wars during the 2010s, and have a degree in a communications-related field. When people immediately assume I'm an easy mark because I'm autistic, they're putting themselves at a disadvantage.

Because far from being easy to influence, I am actually an uncommonly experienced, knowledgeable, and skilled troll.

No. 1625115

>>1623724
What the actual fuck. Please be trolling.

No. 1625122

>>1623583
Well I didnt write that my mom cant have eye contact, she cant even pretend bc she cant look at the person at all. She also doesn't get sarcasm/irony, only talks in monologues, cant read other people, has frequent meltdowns if things arent exactly how she likes it, rocks back and fourth etc. Still think she doesnt have the tism?

Like that was not an example of why my mom has obvious autism, its just something I've notices she and a lot of my autistic friends do. Also since they are so set in routine, they get meltdowns of someone tries to even just explain the correct way of doing things. Havent seen any NT get than when corrected in that way

No. 1625127

>>1623533
>>1623724
I think struggling with cleanliness has more to do with mental health generally than with autism per se. Autistic people are more likely to experience mental health problems because we live in a world not built for us, and so when you combine this with people who probably don't even know they're autistic and how to take care of their specific needs, you end up with mentally ill behavior. To give only one specific example, if you already experience executive dysfunction and you're in an environment which even further kneecaps your executive functionality, obviously you're not going to be able to thrive and take care of yourself properly. I see this a lot with my retarded narcissist father, who is also very obviously autistic but never learned the life skills autistic people need to know that normalfags don't

No. 1625455

>>1625111
Stop pretending to be autistic.

No. 1625491

Have any nonnies here got out of really bad/toxic friendships and then healed from them? I need hope. I feel like I can't trust anyone anymore because I'm too spergy to see warning signs when trying to make new friends.

No. 1625494

>>1625491
I'm in the same boat as you anon so unfortunately I don't have advice but I do feel for you and understand

No. 1625497

File: 1688593732981.jpg (9.72 KB, 326x293, IMG_7129.jpg)

>>1625491
I just kinda never got over my toxic friendships and never got too close to anyone again.

No. 1626002

>>1625491
I was in a few, but mainly one, toxic friendships most of my life. The kind where she wouldn't have been my friend if we hadn't just happened to know each other as kids because teen and adult me would never have been cool enough for her to even look at.
I didn't realize until she moved away how I was constantly on edge about her suddenly calling me and forcing me to do things I didn't want to. The more time went on the better I felt, it's been a few years now and I feel free for the first time in my life. I did feel very guilty afterwards, because she was my "friend" so any bad thoughts I had about her made me a bad friend and person. But the more I talked to new friends about her the more I could see their reactions and even see it from another perspective. They were in agreement that she was toxic and a bad friend and it wasn't my fault she acted like that.

I always tried to keep my distance from her but I was a doormat she bossed around so not until she moved away did I finally get free, I didn't manage to get out on my own. I guess me moving away would also have helped.

No. 1626038

>>1625491
I just ended up biting the bullet and tried making new friends anyways despite my trust issues. I recommend trying to have some leverage, only reveal embarrassing shit when they reveal theirs and only reveal personal stuff after knowing them better (they reveal theirs). It makes me feel better when those "oh god are they actually just collecting info to make fun of me" thoughts come in.
Also remember if you're the one making effort to see them always and they never make an effort to see you, it's a warning sign, remember to be lazy sometimes and that in a friendship they got to put some effort too.

No. 1626059

>>1625455
I have a clinical diagnosis if that matters to you, normalfag

No. 1626272

>>1626038
This is what I think saved me from my last toxic friendgroup, because they had overshared so much and I had so much dirt on them that when I left they didn't really try to do anything to me. To be honest I wouldn't know what to do with blackmail anyway because I hate drama and I hate being mean. I don't practice the art of bullying others so I'm bad at it kek. Luckily they didn't know that.
>>1625494
>>1625497
>>1626002
I'm so sorry this has happened to all of us. I want all my autist nonnies to have nice people in their lives. Wish we had a group that gatekept males and non-spergs.

No. 1627594

>>1622476
in my country you are required to take 30 hours of lessons but i was still super stressed out after that so i had like 60 before i felt like i could try the exam, took me 5 tries to pass it anyway, i'm still very anxious when driving but it's nothing like the stress i felt at first, i thought i would just give up and wouldn't be able to do it but after so many hours it wasn't as bad, 2 hours is nothing so there is no reason to give up yet nonnie. Make sure you get a good calm instructor.

No. 1630911

Can autists develop schizophrenic-like symptoms? All this time I thought I'm an autist and my therapist also suggested that. I not only had problems with socialization but also many sensory issues and I developed slower than other kids when it comes to motor skills, I also couldn't even read hours from an analog clock till I was like 16 and had learning problems despite having above average intelligence. But in my mid 20s I started developing some obsessive thoughts, and it's been getting worse for the past 4 years. Stuff like thinking about gang stalking and "magical thinking". And everytime something bad happens to me or someone is being mean to me I have thoughts like "this is a conspiracy against me", I feel observed etc. Or when I buy something nice for myself, which I do rarely, and then something bad happens, I think "I'm being punished for wasting money". Of course I'm obsessed with patterns and conspiracy theories (it started when I was 13) and I look for patters and conspiracies everywhere. I don't have any friends not only because I just can't connect with people unless they have the same specific interests as me but also because I know their way of thinking about the world is too different from mine. Also I h a t e moving from one location to another so something like traveling or even going to another city is too tiresome for me and normal people usually like that kind of stuff, with me it wouldn't be possible. But anyway, I'm most concerned about the schizo thinking. My therapist wants to give me an "official diagnosis" but I'm too scared to go through evaluation process, I'm scared it will turn out I'm a schizo. Also I heard they need to talk to people who knew you as a kid and my mother is dead and my grandma is like 90 and disconnected from reality kek so I can't bring anyone who took care of me when I was a kid

No. 1631042

>>1630911
I don't know whether people with autism can develop schizophrenia like symptoms, but know people have both. I don't think you should need someone from your family to come with you to get a diagnosis. They just like to say that because schizophrenia can be hereditary, but it isn't always hereditary. Also, I know getting a diagnosis can be scary, but the diagnosis doesn't actually change your disorder it only puts a label on itm if you have schizophrenia, you'll technically have it whether or not a doctor has observed it in you yet. Plus, if you get diagnosed, maybe you can get some kind of treatment, or special disability services.

No. 1631044

>>1630911
I know some autiaya that have comorbid disorders that can result in schizotypal type episodes. for example someone's bpd and autistic, cptsd and autistic, bipolar autistic or even something like actually schizoaffective or schizotypal.

No. 1631156

>>1631042
>They just like to say that because schizophrenia can be hereditary, but it isn't always hereditary
I meant diagnosis for autism, she said that usually they need to interview someone who took care of you when you were a child so they can ask them about autism symptoms that you couldn't remember but they could

No. 1631298

This is going to sound stupid but does anyone ever get weird looks from workers at a store? I have sensory problems, and I often get really anxious going out to places like malls, grocery stores, etc. I feel like because I'm so anxious about being in public, people think that I'm suspicious and I am going to steal something. I also get really nervous when someone approaches me (i know it's their job to ask how I am doing, some sales pitch, etc) so that only adds more to my paranoia.

I still think of this time of when I was at a grocery store and some dude kept following me around. It was creepy. I just wonder if I look as bad as I feel, which causes a worker to think that I am going to steal. IDK.

No. 1631533

>>1631298
In a weird way I don't mind getting looks from workers because they unknowingly keep me safe from others by keeping an eye on me. Ain't no one gonna assault me when staff is watching me kek
>I was at a grocery store and some dude kept following me around. It was creepy.
I haven't tried this myself but I've read about social interactions and I would try something like this if it was me: if it was a staff member you could think of something you want that you don't know where it is (or pretend not to know) so you have a reason to ask them something. So you can go up to them like "excuse me where do you have tomato paste(random item example)?" and after they reply/show you where then make sure to say thank you properly and maybe throw in a line like "you guys are always so helpful at this store!" which will make them feel good and like you're a nice person who can be trusted. Then try to remember to smile at them if you come back to the store and you see them, as if to say "I remember you, you helped me last time".

No. 1631566

File: 1689156017976.jpg (52.16 KB, 466x462, 81P4SbEd-VL._AC_SX466_.jpg)

This is embarrassing because its more on the tard side of the spectrum but does anyone else have a problem with what i guess would be called pain seeking stimming? I'm not diagnosed but that's what my friend who is diagnosed told me it was called when i told her about it. Ever since i can remember i would hit myself in the head when i got upset or overwhelmed, and while obviously my self control increased as i grew up i still sometimes end up with bruises on the back of my head. I've tried the acupressure rings and holding ice and they mostly work but there are times i either forget to use them or they aren't available. I feel really alone and humiliated being an adult with a full time job and still struggling with this because all the resources assume the autist in question is also an intellectually disabled child.

No. 1631585

>>1631566
Same anon, I usually just bite myself now, I used to run against walls and fall down stairs on purpose when I was a kid though. And yeah, it's sad there's so many autism related resources target kids/parents with "your child" wording, it feels as if it's something that you should already have dealt with/know how to deal with.

No. 1631595

>>1631566
Have you tried wearing a rubber band on your wrist and popping it on yourself whenever you get the urge?

No. 1631597

>>1624011
>ADHD drivers are the worst
Totally a crapshoot, my Nigel has severe ADHD but is hyper focused when driving. He is the best driver I have ever known.

No. 1631706

Adderall is causing me to constantly clench my jaw for the past couple of weeks and it's driving me insane! My jaw muscle has been feeling tense or tired on top of already having TMJ so it's just uncomfortable in general. Besides a mouthguard, does anynonny have any tips or tricks? To ease this or make it go away? It seems like such a small issue but I don't think I can take much more of this

No. 1631800

I am sick and tired of the internet demedicalising autism and turning it into uwu quirky different way of thinking, silly stims and obsessive silly interests uwu.
Secondly, why is it ableist to acknowledge that autists can be annoying and problematic with their behaviours? Autists can be blind to or struggle with social or emotional cues, while struggling with emotional regulation and self-perception themselves, and having highly obsessive interests. Yes we can't help it a lot of the time, but it seems to be perceived as ableist to say it out loud, or say that it very much does impact our relationships and communication with others.
Blah blah not all autists are like this blah blah I'm making a harmful generalisation and whatever, but many of these are literally in diagnostic criteria.
Is it really "ableist" to admit that most people would find me super annoying and weird if I started sperging out about some new special interest or lore behind some series I hyperfixated on? Is it really "ableist" to say that making noises or moving my body (stims) in a designated quiet setting is disruptive?
It also seems to be perceived as ableist if you offer them help for this, like just because we can't help it doesn't mean those things don't impact our friendships, relationships, social functioning, etc. It isn't fun being unable to read others, being unaware of their needs, but expecting them to cater to you and still be friends with you.
That's also why I don't get the hate on ABA therapy; if it openly abuses the child, is too demanding to their learning pace, or physically punishes them for more natural things like stims then that should absolutely be condemned, but most of what I've seen on it is that it teaches them skills to function and self-regulate in a neurotypical society. What is wrong or ableist about this?
If ABA therapy didn't exist, I wouldn't be able to talk and would be a retarded womanchild living off her pensioner parents as a grown adult, and the internet will call me internally ableist or whatever buzzword for it.
Why is it encouraged for neurodivergents to stay blind to cues and be socially inept and excuse all the times they emotionally hurt people or do something wrong, just because they may not have the full intention? Arguably, wouldn't this be ableist?

No. 1632009

>>1631706

i happened to see this but i suffer with tmd myself and i got a botox injection in one of the muscles of my jaw and it helped a lot with making my jaw more relaxed in general, it's not really a cure but it may help you with pain.

No. 1632640

Nonnas I definitely have adhd but I am seriously thinking I should get tested for asd but it is such an expensive process and I feel so frustrated because out of the few people I have confided in about my mental health half of them totally see the signs and the other half are so dismissive. Alot of my friends are neurodivergent/diagnosed asd and can recognise the signs but I can also see what other friends are saying in that I am very socially competent. I just feel like there is something more than adhd going on with how I struggle to identify my emotions and I can become overwhelmed in a way that I can't control. It could also be bpd but at this point in time I have no clue. I have this theory that maybe adhd and asd are like opposing forces that kinda balance each other out in ways that make me "normal" enough to function in society but also I am weird enough that I definitely stand out. I know I should just go get assessed but its so expensive and I don't want to spend all that money and time just to be told I'm a self diagnosing attention seeker.

No. 1634362

>>1631800
I agree with all of this and I find that a lot of people who are actually autistic do too, but that people who claim to have it online disagree… I'm sure they're not all faking it, but fakers have the monopoly on "autisitc opinions" online.

No. 1634441

I'm going to ramble for a bit nonas but I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.

I still feel like there's something profoundly differrent about aspergers and "classic" autism but I'm not educated enough to know exactly what.

For one thing they say aspergers/autism is hereditary and every aspie/high functioning autist whose family I've met has had at least one other family member who seems very aspergery as well. But for the low-functioning autists I've met neither parent has seemed like they're on the spectrum, they all have seemed very normal. Of course this is fully anecdotal, but it's still made me wonder about the differences. Down's syndrome, among other genetic disorders, is typically not hereditary, and I've started to wonder if maybe classic autism isn't either but the blurred line of what autism is and aspergers (and adhd) being called autism now may have overcomplicated it all and mixed different conditions together.

In a way I just don't buy that "it's a spectrum". In my opinion the disorder was made into an "identity" online, as a part of subculture, and that made people want to fit into it to be part of a group. Experts in the last 20-30 years have made the mistake of listening to the emotions of the group they're studying and ignoring facts. We see the same pattern in the trans movement where experts are now advocating for the literal mutilation of healthy children and teens just because "they want it, and they want it now". And most of those children aren't even suffering from gender dysphoria, just like how I strongly suspect the autists that have been listened to weren't even autistic to begin with.

Currently I feel like there should at the very least be more sub-categories of autism. There are currently different diagnoses for OCD and ADHD but they're creeping closer to being called just "autism" every year it seems. Some aspies/autists biggest struggle is sensory issues. For some it's almost purely social issues. How do we know the cause is REALLY the same thing? Why don't we separate them from each other and treat them as separate issues?

When I see a low functioning autist I can't really relate (and not just because I'm a sociopathic sperg kek), not even in a "I do that too, just on a lower level" way. I just do not function like them at all. I also can't relate to specific ADHD traits, because I simply do not have them either. Yet I look at other females with aspergers and we all act very similar and I can relate a lot.

No. 1634449

>>1634441
I agree, merging the aspergers and autism diagnosis was a mistake and only made it harder for each group to get the help they need. Autists have help took away because "autism is a gift" or "it is merely a different way of thinking" meanwhile aspergers have a hard time getting a diagnosis for "autism" since aspergers isn't a diagnosis anymore and since "it isn't bad enough" they can't get any help at all.
I tried getting a diagnosis in my country but since it was lazily changed to comply with the new meta they just took out the aspergers diagnosis. I can't get any help or use any resources or get help from organizations that would be available to me just 10 years ago. I went to multiple doctors and they straight up told me "we know you have it but we can't officially diagnose you with it since you aren't in danger to yourself or anyone around you and are over 18". My dad got a diagnosis before the switch but can't use any resources since "aspergers isn't a thing anymore" and he doesn't have "autism" on paper.
However if I complain about this in other places online I get called a nazi because of the name "aspergers" and also dumb shit about everyone having autism since it's a spectrum.
I wish the merge never happened.

No. 1634579

>>1634441
>the disorder was made into an "identity" online, as a part of subculture, and that made people want to fit into it to be part of a group.
I'm not sure what you mean by this. Are you saying that people with aspergers and autism fakers created a subculture online where they revolved their whole personality on autism (but only the quiry parts of autism not the hardship) which led to a social pressure of merging the diagnosis?
I agree with everything you said btw.
>>1634449
fuck that sucks I'm sorry you have to deal with that. Merging the diagnosis benefits no one and now both groups struggles. The merge hasn't happened in my country yet but american idpol is starting to take over so I dread it's only a matter of time. I'm not active in any aspergers community but I sometime lurk on aspergers and autism advocacy groups from my country and so far none of them has suggested a merger so that's good
>I get called a nazi because of the name "aspergers"
I hate this so much. Yes the name is unfortunate but most people haven't even heard about him yet they get accused for being nazi sympathisers for calling the disorder aspergers. Someone online told me once I should stop saying aspergers but it's literally my diagnosis. It's what my medical journal says what else am I suppose to say? If I seek accommodation for autism I'm not gonna get it because that's not my diagnosis

No. 1634625

does anyone feel like they have support? my therapist is great because she's like a mom to me, she's not the stereotypical cold and aloof therapist. she says I can text her when I'm going through things and need help (I of course do this within reason) and I can ask her about random stuff like haircare tips and she will share personal anecdotes and tips. I wish more Healthcare was personalized rather than frigid. it really feels like she cares about me and helps. I don't really have that with many people

No. 1634731

>>1634441
I agree with all of it. I hate the Reddit/tiktok-ification of autism/aspergers (which is forbidden to say apparently). You can’t even say “low functioning” or “high functioning” anymore because it makes people feel bad I guess. These people act like sjw stereotypes, constantly language policing and purity testing. I believe most of them don’t even care about the shit they claim to be offended by… it’s just some weird complex to try and make people feel bad or stupid for misspeaking. Maybe in some years more research can be done. I never even thought about it but I also noticed the lower functioning autistic types had NT parents.

No. 1634753

File: 1689460264237.jpg (52.49 KB, 440x693, 9781914240461.jpg)

Has anyone read Strong Female Character by Fern Brady? She's a sperg too and she's so fucking funny

No. 1634779

>>1634441
> I've started to wonder if maybe classic autism isn't either but the blurred line of what autism is and aspergers (and adhd) being called autism now may have overcomplicated it all and mixed different conditions together
This is a fascinating thought nonna, if anyone knows more about it please respond. From what I've looked up, classic (or low functioning) autism is different from aspergers in terms of gray matter volume in the brain at different parts. But both aspergers and autism have volume increases in clusters in the ventral temporal lobe of the left hemisphere. So, that's one aspect where it's 'linked'. Though I admit I was looking at older scientific papers from 2011 since the scientific community doesn't use the term aspergers anymore (see: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3201995/ and the researchers themselves admit limitations in their study). But as for why both parents can be NT while the kid is severely autistic, it has to do with how parents, despite not having anything themselves, may carry certain genetic variants that increases the chances of their child developing neurodevelopmental disorders. (See: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30258228/ Just an abstract so don't take it as gospel) Almost 7000 children with severe neurodevelopmental disorders like intellectual disability, autism and birth defects were looked at. Usually these disorders are caused by single gene mutations but researchers found that about 8% of the risk of the disorders in this group was actually due to common genetic variants (small normal differences in DNA that many people in the population share). Honestly I suck at reading research papers and science behind autism is pretty everywhere and not great so take everything I say with a grain of salt. I'd love to see more stats and info about the parents genes of spergs versus parents of classic autists, or just in general what the fuck is going on. I hope one day some sperg finally figures it out.

I really really dislike how it's all a spectrum now and the whole identity factor. The whole deal about fitting into a group sounds way more NT than spergy but maybe that's just me lol

> When I see a low functioning autist I can't really relate (and not just because I'm a sociopathic sperg kek), not even in a "I do that too, just on a lower level" way.

Same, but I could see that for sensory issues and being overwhelmed or the tics or stimming but the social aspect? Like, they don't even speak much. How could you know that's the same thing? They straight up have limited social abilities, not that they can't understand what the other person is feeling immediately or taking things literally.

No. 1634852

>>1634779
Nta but I believe adhd/autism/aspergers are all various over activation of regions in the brain associated with pattern recognition (except adhd, I believe that is underfunctioning pattern recognition i.e. unable to predict time passing or notice it passing etc). More severe autism you get rhythmic hand flapping, rocking, etc usually in response to sensory overload….sensory overload imo is something going on in the autistic brain where it laser focuses on whatever the stimuli, example- a low murmur of voices at a busy restaraunt, and their brain being hardwired to pick up on the pattern much stronger than an nt person, in order to understand it/find meaning in it…not being able to do so results in panic and creation of their own stimuli in which they understand and can predict (repeating noises, tapping, flapping etc depending on the person afflicted). Pattern recognition was vital to our evolution, so we know when a poison berry is mimicking a non poison one, seeing edges and outlines clearer and clearer, and to notice when its time to plant a certain crop. I think most of the time there is balance within the brain where patterns are picked up and labelled, example the features of your moms face get filed away as "mom" when you learn to recognize her, but maybe some autistic people cannot see a sea of faces and recognize that as "crowd" and only have the brain juice to assign specifics a meaning or definition so they panic or get anxious. I think that is a spectrum, the severity and locality of how and where the pattern recognition bits got wonky

No. 1634856

>>1634852
Same anon forgot to mention I also think there are so many genes involved with pattern recognition that of course the entire population will have some mixed concoction of them all, since we all are ancestors of creatures who evolved to recognize things with precision over millenia, and that means any little defect in one of those abundant genes can manifest as an autistic trait, yet not be traced to a specific genetic lineage

No. 1634927

I'm so tired of being a stupid sperg, and I just knew about this 6 months ago.
I don't like going out and whenever I have to I go through a phase of intense sadness and fatigue (I think?) because I dont really want to go but I force myself to do it, and I feel like that until I get home and get some 'alone with headphones' time.
I told my therapist about this and he just told me that if I don't want to go out, I shouldn't, but the thing is… I never want to go out. I used to work in a tattoo shop but since 2020 I lost the job and work as a digital artist, so I dont really need to get out to work.
I force myself because I feel like my life is going to be inside my home all the time, I see people my age going to parties, having friends, studying and stuff and I can't help but think that I'm failing at doing what I'm supposed to do at 24 years old, but like I said, I don't want to do those things.
So I'm in a constant loop. Does anybody else feel like this?

No. 1634988

>>1634927
I'm exactly the same as you are. I'm working freelance online at home like you, but because I never leave my room for anything but errands and my sleep is around the clock (plus I literally don't have any irl friends that I didn't meet from the internet, even then that's like… 2-3 people), it makes me feel like the rest of the hikki NEETS here. I should go outside, but where? I don't know how to meet people, and I also don't want to meet people. Even online I find it hard to make friends, so why try? But at the same time, I feel like the world is passing me by. Sure I love this 'freedom' of mine, but there's a nagging feeling that I should be more like everyone else. But I don't want to work a 9-5, I don't want to have to put up with small talk and colleagues, I don't want to face interviewers and people. It's conflicting. Once I went to a social party event at some club looking place, my anxiety was through the roof and I ended up keeping to myself or hiding out in the bathroom. It's like I'm lonely but also not.

No. 1635110

>>1634579
I'm glad no one advocates for the change in your country nonna, in my experience it's normies of all people who manage to get that changed and ask for you not to say aspergers. They changed it in my country since the "english" changed it and they're always right and shit. It came from the upper side of things not the actual people who suffer from the diagnosis change or the organizations and the doctors obviously disagree with it but nothing can be done about it. So I believe you shouldn't look at the autism/asperger groups but how normies react to aspergers because that's what got it changed here, because it's "uncomfortable" to say it or even talk about it due to nazis or something.
>>1634731
I noticed most normies who fake being autistic now and complain about aspergers or "low functioning" are just those so quirky le random people from the 00s or the "geeks" (not really) from the 10s, this is just the new form of them being so weird and quirky in current year. It's also amazing how uncomfortable they react to me in real life and to my weirdness since I do that shit with camera off and not for likes.

No. 1635161

I really can't stand all the "relatable" content on autism/etc that people reshare a million times because "that's soooo me", anything from getting moody and irritable because of sensory shit to the inability to connect emotionally with other people or leaving things half-finished for eternity. I don't really find the shit that makes everyday functioning difficult a cutesy thing.

Also holy shit do the moralist type of autists annoy the shit out of me

No. 1635594

>>1634927
I was very much in the same situation as you and nonna who responded to you, just a couple weeks ago even. The #1 thing to look out for is making sure you are eating properly, hydrating, and getting vit d. This is essential since you are not leaving the house as much so you are getting less sun exposure. Low vitamin d will wreck your life, you can easily get your levels checked with a blood test. People with sun allergies have to take supplements for most of their lives, and this is perfectly fine, so you can do that too if you stay inside a lot. You also want to monitor your iron levels bc as women we are particularly prone to anemia, and that can really suck
>I see people my age going to parties, having friends, studying and stuff and I can't help but think that I'm failing at doing what I'm supposed to do at 24 years old
Look at what nona said >>1634988 she went to that party and didn't even have fun. People who go out drinking, partying, dating do that because they WANT to do that. They enjoy it. Forcing yourself to do things you don't want to because you think you should is going to make you unhappy. You are not those other people, you are you. Don't waste your short time on this earth feeling bad for being autistic. Find things that make you happy and then enjoy doing those things. And don't worry about "missing out" on stuff. You're going to be so worried about not getting what everyone else has, you're going to miss what you have right now.
>>1634988
>It's like I'm lonely but also not.
I think a lot of us are in the same boat where our high school friends moved on to college or the workforce and found relationships there, but we struggle with making new acquaintances since school ended. The same principle applies to making new relationships: find somewhere you can be present at consistently and there you will begin interacting with people. This can run from built in community (grandma's house on the weekends) to seeking out a group and scheduled time with them. Pick a frequency that doesn't make you want to die. A hiking group every weekend for 4 hours can be nice, or you can find a book club that meets up every few weeks for light discussion and you leave after a couple hours. Try looking for groups at the library, your local college, or even online.

Of course, you may also be depressed. There are high rates of depression among autistic people, which makes sense given the general social incompatibility. You can see a psychiatrist about medications for depression and/or anxiety. It honestly helped me get out of a huge rut when I was in my early 20s, and anything that improves your mood without negative consequences is always worth looking into.

No. 1635810

Speaking of loneliness, do any of you get lonely but have 0 desire to make friends? I feel like maybe the issue is that I've been let down by other people for so long that my brain has become blackpilled on them or something, idk. Like my primitive unga brain hates being alone for too long but the rest of my brain finds being around people stressful and unrewarding. I like being a part of group settings where no one has to see me. idk

No. 1635811

>>1635810
Yes, I feel this way exactly! I just wanna be my own best friend.

No. 1635812

>>1635810
yeah at this point in my life I don't feel like I have the capacity for it. I'm thankful for my few close friends who i mostly interact with not in person.

No. 1635828

I think I might be autistic but I'm scared to get a fucking diagnosis.
A lot of autists say getting a diagnosis makes navigating through life ten times harder due to attached stigma and hearing that makes me feel like shit. I can't help that I am the way I am and unfortunately there's nothing I can do to make myself more comfortable to non-autists. I've already tried everything and each attempt was an utter failure and left me friendless with severe abandonment issues.
And to be completely honest, I don't know if I can handle being autistic on top of my depression, PTSD and anxiety. Are there any nona's itt who feel the same way? Is staying undiagnosed the better choice? Why does the world find pleasure in making us feel like literal burdens just for being born different? Sometimes I wish I could be normal.

No. 1635838

>>1635810
Yes. It’s rarely worth it by the time you get close enough to someone to realize their flaws or annoying habits. I already have to accept my boyfriend’s and that’s more than enough for me. I hung out with some potential friends last night and it’s fine but conversation always ends up circling to astrology, and I have to bite my tongue trying not to tell them what I think about it (that it’s lame bullshit). There was another autistic girl there and I liked her the least… I somehow get along so much better with BPD or bipolar girls than another autist. Especially the one who loudly announces she’s autistic every chance she gets. Sigh.

No. 1635853

>>1635828
Having a diagnosis hasn’t changed my life at all.. it’s your choice on who you disclose that info to. So far I’ve chosen not to disclose it to anyone besides close friends and my therapist. I will say that my evaluation was a bit humiliating and awful because it was done by an unpleasant gay man. If I could go back I would choose only to be evaluated by a woman. If you don’t want a diagnosis at all, that’s perfectly fine too. It’s your life!

No. 1635854

>>1635810
I actually really enjoy hanging with others and am naturally extroverted. Problem is I only like hanging with people I know well. Another problem is I have limited opportunities to get to know people well these days. Yet another complication is that I end up not liking 9/10 people I get to know.

No. 1635960

>>1635810
I'd probably like someone to go and eat burgers with, but i genuinely do not like having conversations with people very much. I often just don't know what to say and i get frustrated when i can't figure out what kind of conversation they want to have or i constantly miss my cues to make a facial expression.
>>1635828
My life has not changed, all it's done really has given me an explanation for my behaviour. I completely relate with you though, i've just settled for living in isolate since i was a teen and get all my interaction online.

No. 1636301

>>1635594
Thank you for the advice nonita, I greatly appreciate it.
>>1635828
I was diagnosed but it wasn't written in my medical story, so only my mom knows, my father barely does because he's one of the people who flat out denies it. Honestly I think he may be an aspie as well.

No. 1636317

>>1635828
You don’t have to tell other people you have a diagnosis. However, there are still some real negative drawbacks where required disclosure is concerned: it can kill your chances of getting life insurance or getting citizenship in certain countries like New Zealand, for instance. For me personally I feel like those drawbacks outweigh any benefit, although I’m also a person who doesn’t feel the need to have a doctor’s permission to understand and have empathy for myself.

No. 1637474

>>1636317
>it can kill your chances of getting life insurance or getting citizenship in certain countries like New Zealand, for instance.
wait really? Im in the US and already have life insurance through my job. Would it not be paid out if I did die? also what other stuff like this is there? now I regret getting an official diagnosis as an adult..

No. 1637834

I'm not sure if it'd be called time blindness, but do autists have like a reality-perception centered only on the present? What got me thinking today is a conversation I had with my coworker saying how XY will be soon back in the office, and that it almost seems like he left yesterday and time just passed by without noticing he's not even here. And for me it's the complete opposite. He's been away for 2 weeks and at this point it feels XY is almost a stranger to me after months of working together, and since he hasn't been around, it became the new normal to me where I wouldn't even notice if he never returned. Why the hell is my brain so fucked?

No. 1637877

>>1637834
Im like this too. Its the main reason I cant keep friends it seems. Out of sight out of mind, I mean nothing malicious from it. But it comes off very cold and I understand completely why. I also just dont have the energy capacity to talk to someone as often as a 'normal' friendship seems to require either, kek.

No. 1637996

File: 1689789325037.jpg (301.69 KB, 1280x1814, a2c8c0e225d16c99a1d0b8418b1104…)

My aspergers has made me incredibly isolated and lonely. I can not connect with people in any meaningful way. I can small talk to people just fine (or at least I think I can) but I can't take the relationship to "next level" I don't know when I can start calling them friends and when it's appropriate to start hanging out.

I know many people with social anxiety who have Nigels or actively dates, I know other aspies and autists who have huge friend groups they frequently hang out with. Don't get me wrong I'm happy for them but these are disorders that affects ones social life and yet others just seems to "get" it. They know what to do to connect with other people but I just can't.

I'm close with my family and I love them so but even when talking to them I feel like their is some sort of invisible barrier I can't get trough. If it wasn't for the fact that I grew up with them I don't think I would ever have gotten close to them.

I only celebrate my birthdays with my family and sometimes my siblings brings their partners along and it feels weird because I don't have any friends of my own to invite. I'm reaching that age where people start to travel with their friends but no one is inviting me to comeeven though they love to talk about their planned vacations in front of me which makes me super bitter. If I outlive my family then I'm gonna die alone.

No one has ever shown any romantic interest in me. Not even flirted with me in a liggthearted way. I know there is more to life than romance, I know I should focus on myself before desiring a romantic relationship. But it still feels weird that no one has ever desired me in a romantic context. Specially since so many other people with disorders that affects social skill has no problem with dating.

I don't know how to get close with people it's so complicated I just want a friend but I don't know how. People don't mind hanging out with me but they don't want to be my friend. I'm not pushy or clingy, so maybe I seem to distant? But If I acted less distant I would jsut become annoying and I don't know what to do

No. 1638014

>>1637996
Try joining a group of some sort, perhaps art or sports. It can be a newbie group, it doesn't matter what your level is. Just something you do about once a week with the same group of people. Even if it never leads to "real" friendship (it could, just saying if) I've noticed you still get some of the mental benefits of having friends. You get a group to consistently hang out with and have fun, and you feel like you're part of something.

I recommend art groups, especially ones where middle aged and older ladies like to hang out because they're all chill and friendly. I did a pottery class for a few weeks and had a great time with the older ladies there. Even if you struggle to make friends it still helps combat the loneliness!

No. 1638026

>>1637834
Yes, I get like this too, even with people I've known my whole life like my parents. For people I genuinely love and enjoy, I try to make a little time each day to talk to them even if it's stressful. For me that's a grand total of 3 people (parents and partner) but it's the only way to stave off feeling like a wild animal that's never interacted with people before kek.
>>1637996
I could have written this when I was in my 20s. I really feel you nonny. It's incredibly difficult. Social interaction has rules and hierarchies to follow that you might not enjoy or might stress you out. I don't have it all figured out myself, but the people you're looking at right now know these rules intrinsically, they spent their life learning them as children upwards and we did not. That's why they seem to 'get' it and we don't.
I think what you should ask yourself is if you really want to put a mask on and pretend to be someone you aren't in order to perform friendship for these people. Loneliness cuts very deep, and I know seeing other people having fun without you, like you're invisible, is so painful. But the performance has a high chance of just stressing you out and feeling more like a job than something natural that these people can do, so it might not solve the problem anyway.
If you're really set on it still, my advice is to try and make friends with people who have ADHD. As weird as it sounds, they usually have one foot in our autist world and one foot in the normie world. A lot of the time they can be too weird to be normal and having a grounded autist friend they can be a bit of a sperg with is something they love.

No. 1639571

hello noners once more i have become reclusive. it comes in waves, but it is making me feel really selfish because my best (and only) friend thinks i am starting to leave her behind. going outside is a huge overstimulating jackhammer to my brain because of how fast my brain is moving compared to the world. i have been diagnosed with autism and adhd, but i have been reading a lot about aspergers and it seems like i fit into a lot of those categories. now i am an adult it is much harder to seek further diagnoses/alter my diagnoses because i was diagnosed as a child. my problem is that i want the social interaction but i cannot provide one, and when i try it is the worst, most uncomfortable experience for me and i am certain it is more uncomfortable to whoever i am talking to. every time i am on my own outside all i can think about is everyones eyes on me and how i am being perceived, i notice everything about myself and how i walk, breathe, what i am doing with my hands, what i'm doing with my face (i usually have a retarded blank expression on my face)… i didn't want it to get to the point of people thinking i don't care about them or i'm leaving them out, i want to have these cool and fun social experiences but the lead-up to those experiences and my paranoia seems to ruin it all before it can happen. also, being bpdchan my ambition and any drive i had to do anything productive can be wiped away in an instant. it seems like a ticking timebomb to when things will all go wrong, i feel like people will eventually see me as selfish or as if i don't need them anymore, but a lot of the time i need to be on my own. it gets to the point where even the presence of others or hearing their breathing/chewing/general existing irritates me and i lash out. how do i stop my friend from thinking i am just an uninterested piece of crap?? aaaaagh.

No. 1639639

>>1639571
>how do i stop my friend from thinking i am just an uninterested piece of crap??
Tell her about all of this nona. Be honest and say you have periods like this when you'll need to be alone more but that you do enjoy her company and will eventually get back in a period of wanting more contact. If she doesn't accept it then you shouldn't be friends in the first place.

Lonely nonas should google to see if there are any autism/sperg groups arranged in your city. There's one in mine, people on the spectrum are free to come and go to any of their meetups and you might meet some like minded people who get it if you need to be alone sometimes.

No. 1641696

File: 1690128655226.gif (4.94 MB, 498x345, ena-joel-g.gif)

I feel so stupid, dumb, confused and scared. Last week a co worker asked if I would like to eat lunch in the weekend. As a retard i first thought he actually meant to ask if I normally eat lunch in the weekend. Then later I realised he meant to like invite me. I said yes and it was very fun, this Saturday we went to the Barbie movie and then he mentioned he really liked me and I just feel so fucking dumb because I had no idea this was supposed to be a date. In the end I just told him that I wasn't ready for a relationship and that I was sorry because I had no experience and didn't know this was supposed to be a date. He actually was super nice about it and now I feel bad even more. I'm confused because I just never expected someone to confess to me so I was unprepared and now I have 1000 scenario's running through my head. Should I have not rejected him to try it out? But I don't want to kiss or have sex, what if he expects those things. I don't even know if I like men or sex at all. His face is nice and talking with him is nice. But I don't want to see him naked or touch him. I just feel so stupid and scared because it feels like have led him on. Will I ever be ready to date, do I like men or women will I never like anyone at all? I didn't want him to say he liked me my life was fine before I knew people could feel this way about me and now I can't stop thinking and worrying about having to be in a relationship. It makes me want to cry so bad. Do straight women force themselves to like a man body?? Like do all straight women just pretend to not be discusted by penisses and male bodies and still have sex with them? My sister told me that I should maybe experiment and try out stuff with him because she confessed that she isn't even attraced to her husband and had to force herself to like his body and she was only attracted to his personality. Which just seems horrible. If I wasn't socially retarded would I have noticed that he felt romantic towards me and would I just have accepted without panicking as much and being a normal fucking human being? I have so many questions and worries right now, I want to dig a hole and never come out of it. I will see him again on Tuesday what do I even say to him? I'm to scared to text him too, I feel so bad because I don't have many friends and I finally thought to have made a friend.

No. 1641702

>>1641696
maybe i should have posted this in the advice or vent thread instead but because i have autism and really struggle with the concept of romantic relationships i would hope other autistic anons would maybe relate or maybe give me advice.

No. 1641733

>>1641696
Calm down nona, you didn’t do anything wrong. Actually it was really cool of you to be straightforward about the misunderstanding once you realised. He probably really appreciates that.
>Do straight women force themselves to like a man body??
No
>Like do all straight women just pretend to not be discusted by penisses and male bodies and still have sex with them?
No. The vast majority of straight women are physically attracted to male bodies.
>My sister told me that I should maybe experiment and try out stuff with him because she confessed that she isn't even attraced to her husband and had to force herself to like his body and she was only attracted to his personality.
Okay, or this I guess. It’s pretty retarded to get with someone you’re not attracted to, though. You can’t force physical attraction and it can really fuck you up if you try. Your sister made a mistake and now she’s giving you bad advice as cope. Do not experiment on this basis. Only ever experiment if you feel excited to do so. (Nervous-excited is okay and normal. Scared and/or disgusted is not okay or normal.)
How old are you?

No. 1641811

>>1641733
Thank you for your message, I feel a lot calmer now. Also it makes sense that straight women are attracted to male bodies. I don't think I was nervous excited, def more scared. I'm 22 years old right now, but I have 0 experience with romatic relations. I only had a crush one a girl in high school because she was very pretty and nice but that went away quickly so I'm just very new to these kind of things.

No. 1641995

>>1641733
>Like do all straight women just pretend to not be discusted by penisses and male bodies and still have sex with them?
>No. The vast majority of straight women are physically attracted to male bodies
Just adding that the vast majority of straight women still find the vast majority of men's penises gross and are not attracted to them, hence why dick pics are revolting even if you're straight. For most women there has to be some sort of emotional connection established before the man becomes attractive. The connection could be one sided and made up but it's usually there

No. 1642085

>>1641995
Most women find most dick pics gross because most dick pics are unsolicited. Plenty of us love dick pics from the right man at the right time. But very, very few (maybe even none?) enjoy being surprised by a random dick.
>>1641811
You’re welcome! Please don’t worry too much. Maybe you’re gay, maybe you aren’t. It’s okay to find out at your own pace. You’re still so young. It really does all get much easier with time, I promise.

No. 1642357

>>1641995
>Just adding that the vast majority of straight women still find the vast majority of men's penises gross and are not attracted to them
Is this really true? Because I definitely like looking at and thinking about attractive men's penises if I am really horny. Obviously it's annoying when you're getting it unsolicted. No one likes being sexually harassed like the other anon said.

No. 1642367

>>1641995
yeah definitely. it doesn't help that most men really do have ugly dicks and vaginas are much nicer looking. almost all dicks are pretty objectively ugly. also useless.

No. 1642428

>>1642085
You are right I still am young, I really shouldn't worry about this.

>>1641995
>>1642367
I am not going to lie this makes me confused. I understand the point about how an emotional connection also is important but surely you still need to find them sexual attractive? Like you can have friends and have an emotional connection with them but not want to sleep with them because you don't think they are attractive like that? Do straight women who do not enjoy penises still enjoy sex and are they even sexually attractive to there partner?

No. 1642434

>>1642357
See, even the oddity of women who do like dicks only do so when they’re hormonally challenged like yourself. Do you often engage in reckless behaviour?

No. 1642437

>>1642428
Straight women are attracted to the idea of a man who loves them and “get off” on making him feel good. Unlike gay men they never chase men based on looks, and the uglier your boyfriend is the more social points you score. It’s like you’re making a point about how serious you are about the relationship by saying, see, if I’m willing to fuck this ogre of a man I must be really serious about him! Of course there are exceptions here and there but they’re mostly mentally ill women who have BPD. Not normal(bait)

No. 1642441

>>1642437
Only women with BPD want sexy men? Wtf are you smoking?

No. 1642446

>>1642441
I’m a licensed psychologist.

No. 1642448

File: 1690193701892.gif (485.44 KB, 480x221, sure-jan-322150634.gif)

>>1642446
Kek of course you are.

No. 1642456

File: 1690194851147.jpg (7.34 KB, 225x225, FB_IMG_1659862759929.jpg)

I have an ex-friend who's a girl and was diagnosed with autism in her early teens. I have zero doubt that she has it, when we have had several conversations mentioning her special interests, how she blends up food on the days she's "tired" because she can't stand texture, I sometimes catch her outside in social events lightly stimming and other past ordeals. The thing that surprises me about her is that she's literally a vicious person that plays some scary ass psychological games to people she doesn't like, she was actually extremely popular (she's also very pretty) all of her life and was never bullied, in fact, she was the bully, always. A while after I cut off contact with her due to her and a friend doing me wrong in a very serious issue that involves housing, I sat and realized how she is a "leader" to her group of friends (I was not that close to her so I wasn't part of that) and can manipulate them to bully who she wants, depending on the season and that she has insane social capital in our small town society. I feel like this demands good enough social engineering skills. On the other hand, I'm not doubting her diagnosis and I'm actually happy she doesn't suffer in loneliness like many people with ASD that struggle with their everyday life and social relationships but she's the exact opposite of what the "profile" would be, and I'd like your opinion. Could this be the other side of the coin of autism? Of course, not the inappropriate bullying but being overly aware of social cues and using it to mask effectively? Is the bullying, on the other hand, a way to cope for something? I always thought she was a bad person after all the shit she's had people around her go through, but I'm trying to be empathetic in case she's hurting too and I can't see it.

No. 1642460

>>1642456
The “overly aware of social cues” thing happens with girls who have autism sometimes because they train themselves so well to mask. Never saw it with rape apes tho

No. 1642478

>>1642460
I can see that, the thing is, wouldn't masking seem to be more of a survival thing? She has well-crossed that line with bullying.

No. 1642481

>>1642446
Whatever you say Dr. Scrotus

No. 1642515

Sometimes I think autism is when a person forgets what their friend's favorite color is

they believe they are the problem and so never cease hanging out with socially demanding nuisances

"people pleasing" beyond one's actual capabilities until you grow up entirely uncomfortable with talking with most people, expecting them to be thin skinned and looking for potential flaws in you, and are more comfortable with situations where you know what to expect and what you will be asked to do. Seemingly mindlessly but with excessive notice to strange aspects of interaction or life

No. 1642517

File: 1690201499004.jpg (271.32 KB, 720x2435, w-1.jpg)

taken from the jill thread i needed to rant about this but didn't want to derail lol.
>stim toys
>craft toys
this sounds like an event for children not for autistic adults. I'm very sensitive to loud noises but I'm still an adult and I enjoy doing adult things. I like going to bars to drink but problem is most bars plays loud music. If a bar really wanted to make a "sensory friendly" event then they could just play quiet calm music for a few hours before putting on regular loud club music. I hate how things for autistic adults focus so much on toys. I know some autistic adults likes craft but they can do that at home or at an art center no need to go to a bar to craft. I get the intention of offering stim toys but autistic adults who rely on stim toys already carries their own with them.
And I doubt this event was meant to children even if it sounds like that. First of all it does not specify that it's for children or family-friendly and second, who the fuck takes their child to a bar? I know the event took place at a time that is normally not considered drinking time, but I have been to plenty of parties that starts between 2-3pm. Plus pride is very festive so it makes sense if anyone wants to drink a beer at that time, specially when they are at a bar. also I agree with jill, playing loud music and turning up the lights without any sort of heads up was in extreme poor taste kek

No. 1642520

>>1642478
I don’t know, people are unique and complex sometimes…

No. 1642655

>>1642428
>I understand the point about how an emotional connection also is important but surely you still need to find them sexual attractive?
No, not really. I would say not at all, but this is the autist thread and I am an autist. Because the way I see it, thinking dicks LOOK attractive is one thing.
And liking the sensation of having sex with one is a different thing.
So you can be attracted to men physically overall, such as liking their handsome face and muscles or whatever, but not be particularly interested in what a penis looks like. You'd still be attracted to the "idea" or use of the dick because it brings you pleasure.

Just like how most women might enjoy a vibrator or dildo, but you wouldn't say you're actually physically/sexually attracted to a vibrator or dildo. You just like how it makes you feel.

When I say "not really" I feel the need to stress that you still need to be sexually attracted to the person overall so this is only true for straight and bi women. A lesbian would naturally dislike dicks, so I'm absolutely not saying they could still enjoy dicks. Because they do not.

I think part of the confusion might come from the fact that the internet-tumblr-trans ideology (created by literal confused virgin teens pretending to know what they're talking about) made up a bunch of lies to make themselves feel better and to have a bunch of quirky labels. In particular they pushed the lie that there are 2 kinds of separate attractions: romantic and sexual. In reality they're the same exact thing, they're both just sexual attraction.
When you have a crush and feel like kissing or hugging someone, that comes from sexual attraction and is part of it. Sexual attraction isn't just "being turned on and horny", that's just also part of it.

No. 1642714

>>1642655
>When you have a crush and feel like kissing or hugging someone, that comes from sexual attraction and is part of it
What if I'm capable of experiencing those feelings very strongly towards both sexes, but I feel too disgusted by genitals? Touching and kissing someone would be enough for me, but genitals are so repulsive I wouldn't want to touch them even when somebody is very attractive to me. Am I asexual? How can I find somebody attractive and even get wet thinking about them (which means being turned on right?) but still not wanting to engage with their genitals? I don't know if it's because I'm autistic and I have an extremely strong feeling of integrity and that's why I would never allow anything to enter my body, I also find fluids like sperm or vaginal discharge repulsing so even non-penetrative contact with genitals would be a no for me. I really don't understand how can people treat it as something normal. To me it's like playing with poop. And still, I'm capable of feeling "turned on" by someone

No. 1642724

I must be the most sensitive autistic woman ever

No. 1642738

>>1642714
I don't find genitals attractive, neither male or female. I don't find sex itself a problem for me, even oral or hand stuff for the most part, but I really hate the language around it and especially a lot of the imagery. My ex tried to turn me on by describing acts, but honestly most of it actually turned me off, even though I had no problems touching or licking dick IRL and I'd rather not spare a thought on cum besides it just being a part of the process. While a lot of men try to draw attention on it, try to present cum as something sexy and central to sex. But men ruin sex so much in general that even women that were very sexual sometimes find it a relief when their bedroom dies.
This became a ramble, but point is, that maybe the portrayal and how people talk about sex might be more alarming than it actually is in the moment. I don't know if you have actual experience with it.

No. 1642771

>>1642738
>I don't know if you have actual experience with it
I had an experience with a guy I was attracted to but every time I was about to touch his dick it made me want to barf. I also had an experience with another girl when I was younger and the thought of touching her vag also made me want to barf, even though I loved to touch the rest of her body. I would be perfectly happy to just live with someone, sleep with them, touching and kissing them, but no contact with the genitals. I know I will probably never meet someone like this so I will die alone. But I can't force myself to be someone I'm not and to like something I don't like

No. 1642796

>>1642771
This sounds like actual asexuality (not retarded pomo tumblr asexuality). You may find someone who wants to be in this kind of relationship.
>>1642738
I agree with you about talking feeling worse than doing. My boyfriend and I are both autistic and we have sex but never ever dirty talk (during sex or outside of it). Other guys have tried to make me dirty talk in the past and even just thinking about it makes me feel like I’m going to cringe myself inside out, so I’m glad I found a fellow silent autist kek.
>>1642481
>Whatever you say Dr. Scrotus
my sides

No. 1642959

>>1642655
Thank you for your explanation. It makes sense that kissing is part of sexual attraction since that is not something you would do with family or friends. Also now I think I understand why some straight women might think dicks are ugly but still enjoy penetrative sex with a male. You don't have to look much at it either when it's inside you right, so I guess the pleasure outweights the uglyness.

>>1642714
>How can I find somebody attractive and even get wet thinking about them (which means being turned on right?)
This is something difficult for me, I don't think I'm asexual because most often when I masturbate I don't think of anything. I don't like watching porn. However I have watched it a few times and I feel really bad because I sometimes do think of this specific porn video of an asian lady when masturbating. However it's straight porn and I am not a male but I don't want to be in her position either. I feel really bad when I think about the video afterwards.
Does anyone here think that internet exposure to sex at a young age has created some damage? I stumbled on porn, hentai and just "smutty" fanfiction at a young age. I don't read hentai anymore, but I do sometimes read explicit fanfiction. But it's not like get wet or masturbate to it, that's the weird part I'm like desensitized to it. Also when porn is written I don't mind it, but real porn and sometimes drawn porn really stresses me out and makes me feel weird.

>>1642771
>I know I will probably never meet someone like this so I will die alone.
I don't think that's true, I think more people don't like touching genitals but it's just no spoken about. I think I wouldn't mind being in a relationship where my partner just didn't touch my genitals and I don't have to touch theirs.

No. 1643059

>>1642796
>This sounds like actual asexuality
I was wondering if I might be asexual. But can asexuals experience arousal just from touching someone, like I do? I thought that asexuals don't experience arousal at all. I never read on that so idk

No. 1644174

It's been asked upthread, but do any nonnas here have experience with calmer/loop earplugs? I wear noise cancelling headphones/earplugs but they don't cut out really sharp noises, like slamming drawers or cabinets for example, or the television (especially voices). I want to get a pair to try, especially because they look low-profile enough that I don't think people will notice them if I were to idk, go out to the store with them. Why I'm on the fence is that most earplugs I've tried make internal noises so loud when you're wearing them, so just walking around with normal footsteps makes me sound really loud in my own head.
Are there any sound sensitive autists here? What do you use?

No. 1644949

>>1642714
>What if I'm capable of experiencing those feelings very strongly towards both sexes, but I feel too disgusted by genitals?
Sounds like exactly what you just said. You have the sexual attraction to people, but are repulsed at the thought of sex. You are not asexual because you experience multiple different sexual desires such as hugging, kissing and even have the physical experience of getting wet.
It's not uncommon for people to be repulsed by some sex acts, like how many women don't want to perform oral sex (or even receive it) becasue they think it's gross, despite being straight and liking piv sex. You just have this feeling for sex in general. If you wanted to you could get therapy to try and learn how to not be repulsed by it, but it's not like you have to do it. There are also other ways of having sex, such as having a partner use toys on you instead of their own body parts.

No. 1644956

>>1642959
>Does anyone here think that internet exposure to sex at a young age has created some damage?
Studies all show that, yes. It's done a lot of damage of many different kinds both for girls and boys who saw porn at a young age.
The fucked up thing is you're not even "allowed" to be against porn now because then you're "kink shaming", "not sex-positive" and "denying that sex work is real work". In reality porn generally just harms people and make their lives worse even when they don't even understand it themselves becasue they're too addicted to it to see it.

Even without the harms I still think it's the most pathetic thing ever to get off to watching others have sex, not involving you at all. It's like looking at people eating ice cream and going "wow guys that sure tasted good, right?" you got nothing, you know nothing of the experience, you're too ugly and pathetic to get a mate so you had to watch someone else mate and pretend that was somehow beneficial to you.

No. 1646618

>norwegian comic
yeah op has autism for sure

No. 1646642

>>1646618
Idk what this means but kek

No. 1646727

>>1644956
nta but I'm curious about those studies you speak of. Not in any argumentative way, just wanted to see how much it fucks people up compared to controls

No. 1646728

Sorry but I need to vent. I think I'm too autistic to date despite being high functioning. My libido is very low, which is apparently common for autists, so I don't need a relationship just to fulfil sexual/closeness needs. Instead I keep thinking about dumb details like if a guy has a stocky body shape I can't date him because if we had a daughter she'd be stuck with that stocky male body shape while also having my self-hating autist genes. She'd be miserable. And anyone with an ugly nose is a no-no for the same reason. It's not about me not being physically attracted to the features, I'm perfectly fine with them and sometimes find them attractive. But I'm obsessed with the thought that future children would hate them (because I would if they were on my body).
Same with personalities, if he's a bit too autistic I can't date him because then the kids are doomed to be autistic for sure, having it come from both parents. And I feel so stupid because a decent guy will like me and I can't help but reject him because I take this shit so seriously.

No. 1646774

>>1646728
While I understand some level of selectivity, yours is too extreme. Think about this, you could pick the most attractive (physically and developmentally (?)) partner and still have undesired outcomes.

No. 1648010

>>1646774
>think about this, no matter what you'll probably be screwed
Thanks that didn't help. I'm going to switch back fully to being a suicide autist instead, I mean what's the point of even trying to find happiness as an autist? We're all on lolcow because we're pathetic and sad and don't have good enough lives on our own and this is all we'll ever get. Child me was right, suicide is the only answer because life isn't worth it.

No. 1649286

I hate realizing how much my late diagnosed tism probably played a role in putting a target on my back when it comes to men. From me getting into a relationship that was an abusive headfuck and me not recognizing it sooner to me not knowing how to deal with unwanted attention from (ironically also autist) males who turn near stalker all while I don't know wtf to do. I spent my entire twenties undiagnosed but feeling like I was at this unexplained disadvantage when it came to reading people and navigating situations with men. I have this frustrating mix of in some ways a real stubborn streak but then a passive nature at times becuase I doubt myself and assume the other person is always better at assessing things than me. So I'm set in my ways when I'm single and a pushover when attached. I've always been either isolated or low on friends so there's no support system for abusive males to worry about stepping in or even me confiding in someone to get a second opinion.

Not so much now (I hope) but I look back on my younger pre diagnosis self and see how I was such an easy target. I bottled up alot of shit I went through. I found out lately that an ex from ten years ago had been spreading completely made up shit about me even to my own dad? I never spilled my side of what went down att but at this point.. whats the use. Being quiet, socially not great, not having a whole lot of friends and not being someone who shares their struggles when they come up.. perfect storm for taking advantage and getting away with it. I can't change the past but now that I see it I have to be smarter. I can't unsee the target that puts on me. I wish I had the type of tism where you just walk around with no filter saying whatever comes to mind, that old stereotype. No I self doubted like crazy, was easy to manipulate and bottled everything up. I felt inept but didn't know why. I walked on eggshells, blamed myself and left others to spread lies for so long that I can't retroactively do anything about abuse I chose to stay quiet about. Its like I spent my twenties with the emotional vulnerability someone younger would typically have. I feel like I'm only playing catch up to my age now and I'd to learn too much about men/abuse the hard way.

I don't know if bottling everything up is even a tism thing tbh. That's something I really have to work on. I've years of shit I wish I'd told someone about sooner.

No. 1649313

i hate how there's almost no solid advice on how to mask better. ''just be urself masking is bad'' shut the fuck up i want to learn how to not be treated like a freak

No. 1649341

>>1648010
girl stop being this pathetic it's cringe and retarded

No. 1649343

>>1648010
>abloobloobloo suicide is the only answer cause I’ll never be able to find a man to breed perfect babies with
Anon you’re probably not just autistic but also bpd or NPD kek. What an unhinged moid tier response. What the other anon said was right, you could find the perfect man and still have fucked up kids. You’re fucked up already as is. Why are some people who want kids so retarded, I stg. You could both be perfect examples of human beings with all the right physical and mental attributes and you could still birth a hideous retard child. It happens all the time. If you’re obsessed with having a perfect child you are not fit to parent, period, end of. Part of becoming a parent is accepting that your child could be any level of fucked up and being prepared to deal with it. You could birth a perfect child that gets maimed or becomes brain damaged later in life due to no fault of your own.

No. 1649380

why do people even have sex wtf

No. 1650503

Just wanted to vent. For some reason it always takes me a long time to absorb information. Like I can be told how to do something, and given instructions, but I won't 'get it' until some time has passed and it's sunk into my brain. I have to do stuff like read the same paragraph twice, or take a college course twice, and I only feel like I understand what's going on the second time around. Once I get passed that hurdle I'm good but why is it there in the first place? It makes me feel retarded.

No. 1650528

>>1650503
Some people have slower processing times. For people with ADHD this can be due in part to attention issues, and with autism sometimes it can be due to our lack of synaptic pruning, meaning incoming information doesn't go through as streamlined of a process (to simplify the concept), although there are always other variables and it's just fairly normal for a lot of people.
How much do you repeat things back to yourself, or take notes and turn detailed concepts and instructions into bullet points? Do you think actively doing so more often (like on paper, aloud to yourself, and in your head as you're given instructions) would help at all? If information is just kind of buzzing around vaguely in your head until a second go-over consolidates it into something useful, maybe that process can be actively sped up somehow.

No. 1651276

I think i'd rather vent about my issues her instead of the regular vent thread. My dad landed a bombshell on me that he will be selling all his properties as well as the current house i live in with him and my brother to go back to his home country because he makes more money there by the end of next year. I am one of those people who have been perpetually stuck in school mainly because i never got diagnosed for adhd until this year. Even now, i find it hard because i have short term memory issues and it makes school incredibly difficult for me. I can only scrape by getting Cs and using meds. I had to take two classes twice and I feel weary about my ability to finish school. I also don't trust my ability to get a job. I am not good at masking irl and idk what to say to people irl at all, i try my hardest to say what they want to hear but at the same time i am not very emotive and i always miss the cues of when i should make the correct reaction or response for a situation because i am too slow to think of one and too anxious to be sure it's correct. I try so fucking hard to overcome my retardation but literally nobody gives a shit or tries to help me, all they do is call me lazy and accuse me of spending so much time "playing". I am so angry at times like this my parents decided to refuse treatment for my autism and adhd because now i am struggling for fucking bad, i had to pay for a diagnosis when i could have gotten it free when i was a child. I could have been happy and living a fulfilling life right now but i see to hope for me. At this rate i just want to kill myself.

No. 1651315

The discussion earlier in this thread about the lines blurring between ADHD/Autism/OCD made me want to talk about something.
So I've been professionally diagnosed with both ADHD and Autism. Now, my country does give me the option of free psychological help with these… except that's where the issues come in. You see, the institutions that provide those types of help, are divided depending on what disorder etc. is the issue.
Now my point is, is that basically the Autism one said my issues had to do more with ADHD, and the ADHD one said my issues had more to do with Autism. Basically I was being send in circles and just gave up. Because of how closely related they are.

I'm curious to know if any other nonnies here have experienced similar issues. Personally I just gave up and tried going into private psychology where I pay the high ass fees out of pocket but even that's not turning out great because "Oh well you don't have a specific plan you want to work on" so that's ending soon too.
I just want someone to talk to once a month so my family doesn't need to carry the burden all the time of my emotional support, not to mention feelings I might not want to talk to about with them.

No. 1651316

>>1651276
Nonna, I am sorry to hear about your dad suddenly moving and putting you in a hard situation. I don't know what country you love in now, but maybe you could get some kind of disability or assisted living to help you before he moves. Also ask your university if they have any programs to help students who are suddenly booted by parents. It's extremely hard to navigate, but a lot of countries have some programs to help people like you. Of course I don't know your circumstances, but it's worth mentioning, I figured.

No. 1651439

>>1650503
me too anon!

No. 1652071

I think a concern with masking is that sometimes we get lost in our masks and forget who we truly are, which ultimately leads to unhappiness, I think.

No. 1652177

File: 1691018928350.jpg (83.72 KB, 1080x1080, 1660306429768.jpg)

Sometimes I wish I could just shut the fuck up and stop bringing up obvious, unspoken things everyone else avoids mentioning just because they bother me. It never goes well because people would rather defend the person or thing causing the disturbance than break the status quo, and it makes me look and feel like a bitter asshole. It's always minor shit too, like pointing out that joining an online community with the express purpose of selling shit you don't even know how to make yet is kinda fucking weird, but the way people react you'd think I was insulting their families. I hope I don't sound like I think I'm some Neo type amid the sheeple, I just wish I had better impulse control so I'd stop embarrassing myself.

No. 1652987

>>1652177
you're not alone nonnie. sometimes I'm astounded by how much neurotypicals can take. especially loud shit or people

No. 1654772

>>1650528
attention issues? i know ADHD has "attention" in its name but it has nothing to do with attention, it has to do with not properly being able to prioritize a task or a thought. people with ADHD have executive functioning issues. many people with ADHD have been speaking up about this for years and how ADHD is a horrible name for what it actually entails. i'm also sick and tired of every psychologist now telling people with autism they also have ADHD. i don't even believe autism and ADHD are closely related even tho psychologists say so. autism at its core is a social developmental disorder, and adhd an executive functioning disorder. how in the heck could they even be closely related? but i digress. sorry if i come off as rude btw i don't mean to cause infighting or whatever. i just think the field of psychology is full of shit.

No. 1656564

Does anyone else have self-destructive stims and have any tips handling them? I really like to overstretch my hands and I find it really difficult to stop even though I feel like it might be fucking up my wrist.

No. 1657703

>>1654772
>i don't even believe autism and ADHD are closely related even tho psychologists say so
would love to hear more of your reasons for this as I've always been very sceptical that they're really related too

No. 1657833

Did someone here had deep trouble with being potty trained? I know this is a weird subject but I was diagnosed really late and not going to lie I was in denial at first, but then everytime I had doubt my brain goes "remember you left diapers at 10 because you were afraid of the bathroom you stupid bitch" plus other things that I first I thought it was sensory processing disorder but now I wonder.
Mind you going number one was ok since it's quick, the problem when I was a kid was going number two.

No. 1657837

Fitting that the image of choice for the so-called "autism thread" is something that just every adult human ever experiences.

No. 1657865

A bit random but do any of you feel like having 2 screens for your computer/setup is actually detrimental to your workflow or productivity? I always use my 2nd screen for videos and stuff, but lately I've realized that my productivity was better back when I only had 1 screen. However I'm also just too used to having 2 now, so I don't know if I want to take the jump of removing it (I can't just turn it off because it's too easy to just turn it back on again)

No. 1658155

I don't know if I'm autistic and it's very much getting under my skin.

Many people in my life (many of my close "friends") have implied or outright said they think I am but I still have no idea. I would say I am a fairly well adjusted adult despite it all and I understand social cues/dynamics very well. I've jusr always struggled with being seen as really socially awkward and overinvested in my pet topics. I do really well making friends in nerd spaces but in more normal non-Internet poisoned ones not so much mostly due to just being on such a different page than people in my age range or my only social interactions being younger coworkers.

I know hyperfixate on a number of things and this plus my general social anxiety have always made me an outcast. I did have a psychological report done on me when I was 5th grade age talking about my struggles with making eye contact and I found it hard as a child before I trained myself out of it. I even remember having all of my high school teachers having a serious meeting with my parents but I don't really know if they were implying that I might have ADHD or not.

It's just really frustrating.
>>1439766
God yes, chewing and when people bite on forks drives me fucking insane.

No. 1658294

>>1657703
NTA but imho it has more to do about what’s the DSM prescriptive lists of symptoms and description.
It makes Autism and ADHD overlap just like Bipolar/BPD to an extent that, if you fill out most autistic symptoms you also match for ADHD diagnosis.

No. 1658305

>>1657865
I used to focus on drawing a lot more when my monitors were mirrored. When I found out you could have videos on one while drawing with the tablet…it turned into me watching useless info YouTubes. I work much better if I only keep the program, reference, and a screen less music app open. Two screens doesn't help me unless I needed to write essays for school. Even then you can split screen programs on one monitor. Three would be totally useless for me despite it being the norm with pc builds now.

No. 1658320

>>1658155
Anon are you me?
My boss and co workers often tell me they think I'm autistic and I wonder if I would feel closure getting diagnosed or not

No. 1658551

>>1658155
>>1658320
If you are well adjusted and have no problems don't even bother, people need to get over themselves constantly judging you. I doubt you'd have the nerve to tell them you are austistic. I keep it to myself when i would benefit from telling people a lot because at the end of the day, they won't treat you differently and probably won't see it as a valid excuse for your behaviour and still will expect you to act "normal".

No. 1658560

So I have a problem with wearing clothes and it has only gotten worse with time to the point where the last few years I have struggled to to anything besides go to work and home. I am able to work because I have the specific work clothes which also fit my ‘clothes issue’ requirements. I know kids can have this issue but it wasn’t as bad when I was a child but also my mom would never have allowed me to wear the clothes then that I now find comfy. Although now I don’t care at all but i am sure people just assume I’m a slut or deemed slutty due to the fact that I don’t like clothes touching me. It has cost me a relationship on the past but I have no regrets and I know people stare at me because most of my clothes are absolutely tiny. I honestly give zero fucks about people staring and don’t even notice because I’m too busy focusing on the task at hand whatever it may be. But I live where it’s always hot and my clothes consist of black band shirts that I’ve modified so the combo results in tiny clothes. However, that’s not really the issue. The issue is that even when I’ve modified my clothes to my basic requirements which is no collar on my shirts, no edges on the sleeves (I still will constantly stretch both all day because they feel constricting just touching my skin) I hate anything too baggy or too fitted but the right amount of fitted seems impossible. Also I have to cut the hems off any shorts and tend to pull on the edges of those all day as well because I hate the feeling of things touching the front of my thighs and also hate socks with a passion. Since I do have to wear them I tent to cut off the tops of those as well. I absolutely hate shopping for clothes and go years and years without. Bras are the absolute worst. Aside from bras I will only buy used clothes and it takes me fucking hours and hours of testing clothes to fit my comfort and if there is even a question I can’t justify spending money. I have had and worn the same clothes since just out of high school when I could finally modify them to fit. My weight over the years has only fluctuated with like 30 pounds so I have my ‘bigger’ clothes if that makes sense but get extremely stressed when I am beyond them fitting and lose weight for the sole reason of not wanting to buy clothes. However when I’m not working the thought of putting on clothes to simply go run an errand or even now, simply check my mail or water my plants on my porch has become a HUGE task that I will avoid as much as possible to not have to put on clothes. Especially with it being so hot. I will have a pile of tops and bottoms that I feel are ‘light’ enough for a hot day but proceed to put on and take off every single one in a process of at least several hours because I’ll ‘test’ they out by doing inside tasks in them before seeming them too uncomfortable to wear any longer. I am usually just bare ass naked or if I’m feeling a certain way and want to be covered I wear a large loose t shirt but even that has certain specs that have to be met. I get so frustrated even then because sometimes I don’t feel like being nude but nothing is comfortable. It’s to the point where I am struggling hard. I don’t have a social life so that’s not the issue I mean like getting groceries or dog and cat food. I used to get the animal food from work so could ride off that but i out off important things, am always late to appointments because of all this. I just fucking hate clothes but I like how I look when I am dressed. But even the thought of clothing is off putting. I even was watching tv the other day and someone had an article of clothing that had a high and fitted neckline and I could just feel it on my neck and was like ghost stretching the non existent clothing myself. Ugh! I’ve tried a lot of things too, setting out my next days clothes but I’m not organized enough to do that. Also my clothes are in always in a messy heap because of the constant taking off putting on. I am always folding and attempting to tidy it up but it never lasts. So I’m just venting as no one really knows I struggle so badly with this. I feel like I miss out on a lot due to this (even though I am not social, I do a lot of work for people with animals) and have started missing opportunities or evenings where my presence would have been really helpful and it makes me feel terrible. I just want to live my life and not have to be so impaired but something so minuscule. Fuck.

No. 1658632

>>1658560
sounds like you just need to wear a sundress or something. no bra, no collars, no fabric touching your thighs.
honestly though, take it from another autist, loose dresses or leggings and a size XL quality cotton T-shirt are like a liberation on a sensory meltdown day. also sports bras. i just stopped wearing bras with clasps altogether and can't imagine going back

No. 1658749

>>1658560
seconding other anon, try wearing soft loose dresses. You may also have a skin condition making it feel this bad, try looking into that just to make sure you're not suffering over something medically fixable

No. 1658750

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No. 1662785

I've been thinking a lot lately about the whole increase in autism diagnosis etc. the past few decades. Now obviously there's some explanations like women getting diagnosed more, but my personal shitty theory is this: The way technology and individualism has changed in the same past few decades.
Now hear me out, I don't mean this in a 'technology bad' kinda way, I mean it in the way it changed the structure of every day life. 30 years ago life was a lot more simple in a way. You either went to school or your job, came home, and for the most part nobody bothered you. You could properly turn off for the day. No constant feed of information or social media to catch up on. Nobody being able to send you an email at 8pm. Nowadays you have to always be on, even if you are still in high school. I graduated before it became really bad, but I still distinctly remember the switch from having to show your parents your grades to them being able to log in and see it. My point is that people who would have before not been noticed, are getting burned out way easier or earlier in life, and where before they'd just be the kinda weird fucker in the office, they now need the diagnosis because life has become a lot more stressful. But more importantly, you have to keep up with a lot more things.
The individualism part is smaller because imo that affects every person even more, specifically the death of 3rd spaces. I believe that also affects us spergs because we now lack a certain degree of social connection that used to kinda come with life unless you actively avoided it. Even things like becoming a hikkimori are way easier these days because you can just ensure all your life's needs can be delivered or done electronically. Sounds nice in theory but I know for myself at least I've slipped into almost becoming a full on hikkimori multiple times because it's so much easier now.

To be honest, I think it affects a lot more then just autism, but I feel like we especially get fucked over by it because autism means inherently struggling with information inputs, which have exploded since the start of the internet.

No. 1663987

Nonnas, maybe I will get diagnosed soon. I have always known that I was a freak. I relieved but sad at the same time. If I had been diagnosed sooner I wouldn't have been so lost and confused. I was always the weird kid and the teachers thought that I was a brat when I had meltdowns because they bullied me.
Also, my boyfriend wants to break up with me because he doesn't know if he is able to help me, I don't want him to be my caretaker, I just want to understand me, that's it.

No. 1664008

>>1662785
Agree with a lot of this, especially what you said about third spaces dying. In fact, the only autist-friendly third spaces I can think of are either overwhelmingly male (most hobby shops that hold meetups) or have gotten extremely mainstream and crowded (anime/gaming conventions). Furthermore, Discord has almost completely supplanted the need to interact in person for most social nerd hobbies, particularly TTRPGs. Ten years ago, you'd only have games over Google+ if your gaming friends lived far away or play-by-post in forums if you didn't have a local group, but now people who live in the same city would rather have a virtual game than sit at a real table with each other. Aside from being a shit way to play TTRPGs in my opinion, moving all social interaction online is extremely unhealthy for people who already have social difficulties. Even people who don't have autism get socially stunted if they primarily interact with people online, so autistic people probably get even more fucked up by being terminally online.

No. 1664050

>>1662785
There's another very important factor too: The cultural hyperfocus on academic studies and undervaluing of practical skills. It varies a bit from country to country but overall at least in the west this is true. Before if you hated school and were shit at all of it, you could drop out and still get a job. There was an option to work your way up instead of taking the academic route. In my country that is practically impossible, it just doesn't fucking happen these days - you just can't get a job at all without some kind of higher education. Meanwhile my grandparents still managed to create their own very successful and respectable jobs without even finishing high school.

Now imagine an autist who is shit at school, but his special interest is cars. He can take apart a car and build it back up perfectly again. He'd be the perfect mechanic AND he'd love the job. But he doesn't have the "proper education" for it so he's not allowed to work as a mechanic even though he knows more than 10 other mechanics combined because it's all he ever thinks about. A few decades back he could have opened his own small mechanic shop in peace and done well. But he can't do that now because whatever he does, a multi-billion dollar company can do it cheaper, and he's just seen as an idiot who couldn't finish school.
This is the case for a lot of autists - whatever specialized skills and knowledge they have isn't valued because people think a general random degree is the only proof of worth.

No. 1664053

>>1663987
>maybe I will get diagnosed soon. I have always known that I was a freak.
Anon coming her and calling us all freaks isn't going to get you the compassion you expected lmao

No. 1664064

>>1664053
I know, I know, sorry to offend you all, it wasn't my intention. It was kinda tongue in cheek, I should have said it with other words lmao.
But going back to my post. Do you think that a sooner diagnosis could have helped you or it could be the same? I think it would have been better for me.

No. 1664073

>>1664064
Maybe we would have had an easier life with an earlier diagnosis, but maybe not. Don't live your life thinking about all the "what ifs", focus on here and now. Too many people get stuck feeling resentful to teachers, parents and so on and instead of improving their lives blame all these other people for where you ended up. Even though that could partly even be true, that's still not going to help you. Just acknowledge that it was what it was and be ready to move on.
Regarding your boyfriend tell him exactly what you said here, that you don't want or expect him to be a caretaker. If he leaves you he was trash anyway and you deserved better.

Having a few fellow autistic friends is often good and helpful. However my best advice is to avoid online communities focused around autism like the plague (2/3 there are always self-diagnosed fakers anyway). At most use anonymous forums like this to talk about autism.

No. 1664212

I wish autists would stop calling doing something normal "masking". You weren't masking you just did a normal thing the normal way because you knew how to do it. Doesn't matter if you had to be taught that's how you do it, everyone had to learn it at some point. Some adult autists (typically self-diagnosers) will claim they were masking so hard because they didn't throw a tantrum in the cereal aisle when the coco puffs were sold out. Or they successfully bought a book without trouble, so that was totally masking. Just seems to stupid to me.

No. 1664236

>>1664008
That's such a good point too. To add on, the death of specific forums for each thing. They might have been peak cringe, but there was definitely a certain amount of freedom when it came to stuff like roleplay forums. They were all smaller more focused spaces. Kind of like online third spaces. Of course the pandemic didn't help and so many groups and institutions have used it as an excuse to permanently offer online only.

>>1664050
Also an excellent addition. A bit of blogposting, but I personally struggled immensely with my thesis because it had to be written in a very specific way yet the guidelines were always kind of vague. I find that these days it's harder to potentially get a replacement assignment or anything else because things always have to be the same way for every single student, at least in my country. So everyone doing a bachelors or masters has to write a thesis, no matter how little it fits your specific subject. So now me and others in this situation are the weirdos that took forever writing a thesis or even dropped out when it would have been better for everyone involved to look for an alternative solution.

No. 1664286

Can you get off Sertraline? Do any nona here managed to replace it with something else or nothing completely? I asked this question on behalf of my mom on reddit but nobody answered. Her medic told her with 4 months was enough but it's been 6 years already.

I believe she could have adhd but her psychiatrist would not give her a diagnosis besides severe anxiety

No. 1664368

>>1664286
I had it for a few years, the only reason they put me on it was "well you tried it and it didn't make you worse so that means you should stay on it". I was a teenager so I didn't want to protest the lack of logic and assumed the doctor somehow was right even though it sounded stupid to me. Eventually I started getting so annoyed with the side effects that happened when I missed even just 1 day, so I just quit cold turkey and stopped taking them. I was extremely sleepy and tired for a week or two but then I was pretty much fine. I'm off meds now. Initially I had them for anxiety and depression, I honestly didn't feel that much of a difference (if any at all) but people around me gaslit me into thinking I absolutely needed them for years. They said it seemed like I did better, yet nobody noticed once I was off them again. I didn't tell anyone because I knew they'd be mad I quit meds just like that without even consulting a doctor.

Since it's semi-related, the best strategy I've found for managing my own anxiety instead has been this:
>Knowing literally everything is depressing past 3am. It's a real phenomenon that has been known for so long it's called "witching hour" in old folklore. Night is for sleeping.
>Did I eat and drink recently, did I sleep enough last night? Those affected my mood, especially the lack of sleep.
But the most important one:
>I allow myself to acknowledge what my anxiety thinks is a "threat", and in words I think to myself "well spotted to think of that threat, it's highly unlikely to happen but it's a possibility and therefore you did good in spotting it. Now that you've thought of it we can let it go and think of other things."
Basically I act as if my anxiety is a guard dog barking to make me notice something unusual. When I look at it I can see that the "threat" my dog brain barked at was just the equivalent of a neighbours cat, so I tell it "good job for spotting it, but we don't need to actually worry about that one." Because in my mind if I don't tell the dog that it will just keep barking and think it's a real threat. I also like dogs a lot, so it's easier to be kind to myself if I visualize my anxiety as a friendly dog who's just doing it's job of protecting me by spotting potential threats.

No. 1664441

>>1662785
>>1664008
>but I feel like we especially get fucked over by it because autism means inherently struggling with information inputs
the transition where school started revolving around technology was so hard for me. When I started high school everything had become digitalized. Instead of announcing important announcement they put it online and since I didnt have any friends at the time to tell me that kind of stuff i had no fucking idea what was going on the first year. I almost got kicked out my first year because I never did any of the preparation work before class and I never turned in assignments. The counselor asked me why I never did any work and then he got mad at me when I told him I genuinely can't navigate the website where all this information was because the amount of info on there was confusing lol.
>You could properly turn off for the day. No constant feed of information or social media to catch up on.
>moving all social interaction online is extremely unhealthy for people who already have social difficulties.
Really good points. You can't have a private life anymore. If you texted someone pre-2010 you just assumed that it will take a few hours before you got a reply. Now you are expected to answer immediately and it's seen as bad etiquette to turn your phone of when you're home, because you are going to miss texts and urgent emails from your boss.

Unrelated but I I do wonder how the focus on social media and online interactions affects young autistic kids who already struggles socially. Like back in the days if you got bullied you could at least go home and unwind, not that it was easy to deal with bullying back then, but now with cyberbullying the bullying doesn't even stop when youre home. It's not even like you can look away from the screen nowadays because we have build society around on social media, so you're not even gonna escape harassment when you're home. Keeping your socials private from the people you know irl doesnt even work anymore. Whenever i see kids interact they always talk about their social media so sharing socials has become the default way of interacting for kids. This isn't an autism-specific issue, but affects all kids who are being bullied.

No. 1664559

>>1664441
ayrt and I completely agree with everything you said. We probably are around the same age too going by your description. I distinctly remember avoiding things like facebook because I was sure they'd just bully me online too if I did, but the consequence was that I never knew anything going on and had to hear it by chance if I was lucky. It was honestly really isolating in a completely new way, and I can only imagine that has gotten way worse these days.
For a long time I thought the internet was the perfect escape for me, and while I can absolutely attribute positive things in my life even now to it, I sometimes can't help but wonder how things would have been if I was born 15 or even 10 years earlier.

No. 1667552

Autist nonas what are some good check marks for someone not being autistic that aren't directly accusing them of faking it? I have had very normal functioning friends/mutuals on social media who suddenly start to think they're autistic. I assume it's from watching tiktok, youtube and seeing "autists" online. With most other autists I can usually tell just from how they talk or write (not right away but I see clear patterns). A small minority don't seem that autistic until I meet and see them in person and then I can physically see it in them. When the seemingly normal people say they think they're autists I don't know how to tell them I doubt it. They don't seem autistic at all but it's hard to express why. Any ideas?

No. 1667562

>>1667552
Are the friends reaching out to you for help? If its just people you half know online it will only be awkward and not helpful in the slightest to point out they are normies. It is a spectrum, many nerdy normies will recognize themself in a lot of the symptoms and im guessing they are teens so posting online about it is cringe but a part of growing up. Laugh at them yes, but no need to try expose them unless they are taking away resources from those whose autistic trait makes it a disability

No. 1667881

>It is a spectrum
Is it, though? Can someone actually explain exactly how autism is a spectrum? I've never seen any attempt at it that I agree with, and I find the term completely useless and misleading if it's just supposed to be some stand in for "people are different in various ways". Because yeah no shit, every fucking person is unique so why is that suddenly treated as a vital part of this one diagnosis? (I know I'm going off topic from >>1667552 so sorry about that) but how is spectrum in the name when no one seems to be able to actually define the spectrum? Am I the only one who finds that super ridiculous?

No. 1669951

Where can I find stuff about being autistic and absolutely repulsed by genitalia/human fluids and thus never engaging in any sexual activity involving genitals? I wish I could find more people similar to me. I don't think I'm fully asexual since I'm able to feel sexual arousal just from other forms of physical contact or just by thinking about someone, but I won't have "actual" sex

No. 1669999

File: 1692478806884.jpg (112.68 KB, 919x825, Screenshot_11.jpg)

>>1667881
This is the spectrum, but add like 20 more things to the 5 things shown.
Definition of spectrum: "A spectrum is a condition that is not limited to a specific set of values but can vary, without gaps, across a continuum."
It literally just means that everyone is different. Yes, differences apply to everyone, but autism has been multiple disorders turned into one. Developmental retardation and Asperger's are today, both autism spectrum disorder. But they're very different as well.
It's also the fact that autism is unknown, depression is lack of chemical stuff in the brain, DID is trauma in childhood, Phobias are genetic or developmental though experience. Autism just is, we don't know where it comes from, how to "prevent" it. We can't get a POS or NEG in a blood test and because of that it's hard to define what autism is exactly. Especially with the lack of research in girls lol

No. 1670050

>>1667552
Just ignore them, if you openly try to doubt it they'll just make a psa tiktok about how "some chick came up to me unprompted to tell me I don't seem 'autistic enough.' Friendly reminder that you are valid and no two people will present exactly the same. You are enough"

No. 1670170

>>1667881
This is copy paste but it explained it somewhat

*almost every autistic trait has something to do with extremes, and for most of them, autistic people can be on either end of the scale. sometimes this is for hyper/hypo sensitivity reasons, and sometimes it's due to overcompensation. examples of some typical autistic traits and their equally austistic counterparts:
* no empathy? how about having such extreme empathy that you cry when your stuffed animals are ignored?
* no/wrong facial expressions? how about exaggerated facial expressions because you learned early on you were doing it wrong?
* nonverbal? how about being hyperverbal and not knowing when to stop talking?
* highly advanced vocabulary? how about when you can't remember common everyday words in conversation?
* can't tell when things are awkward? how about having such an sensitivity to awkwardness that you can barely stand being in the room when an awkward moment happens on tv?
* has a meltdown over a small tag on their shirt? how about being so oblivious to physical sensations that you don't know you broke a bone?
* doesn't follow social norms? how about a strict adherence to social norms, often accompanied by severe anxiety that you're not doing it right?
* can't stand bright lights and loud noises? how about pressing lights so close to your eyes that you're temporary blinded and constantly making noises when it gets too quiet?
* no eye contact? how about intense, sustained eye contact that you don't know when to break?
constantly rocking back and forth? how about being unable to walk without getting disoriented?remember this when people say "you don't seem autistic" - there is no quintessential autistic representation. this is what we mean when we say it's a spectrum.

No. 1670578

>>1670170
Why am I both of some of these simultaneously?

No. 1670581

>>1439766
Same, I can’t eat when other people are eating around me. I feel like leaving the room.

No. 1671441

>>1669999
I don't agree with it the spectrums I've seen, for example the "correct" one of those 2 implies an autist can be fully functioning in language, motor skills, executive functioning, perception and sensory skills and STILL quality as being on the spectrum. It automatically includes space for non-autists. It also implies it would be equally normal if the skills were distributed evenly. Or that a person who functions well in every area but one is also still an autist, rather than for example lacking motor skills due to a muscle disroder - that would still fall under the spectrum definition. So it means nothing.
Multiple labels shouldn't be included under ASD, because then it's not a spectrum due to the fact that there's no coherent "it". It's basically a spectrum of retardation. It makes no sense to explain autism this way.

The current lack of research in autsim is only further hindered and not helped by going "well they're retarded alright, we just don't care too much about how or why so just call it autism". Autism/ASD no longer means anything, it's literally just the new "standard retard".

Weirdly, even the "less and more autism" makes more sense even though I don't agree with that one either.

No. 1671451

>>1670170
Samefagging, but I also don't agree that this translates to a single unified spectrum. If anything this is presenting it as binary extremism traits. At best you always just get a spectrum for every single possible trait, which would also imply there's a normality for each spectrum and that either every human is on it or autists can be non-autistic in all areas and still be on the spectrum. And like >>1670578 said, a person seems to be able to be both contradictionary things at the same time.
I can sort of see why some people think a spectrum works to explain it, but like I said in >>1671441 there's not coherent definition of what autism is so it all just means nothing.

No. 1672682

File: 1692698211830.jpeg (1.54 MB, 1242x2154, IMG_3218.jpeg)

I’m autistic (diagnosed) and I have a strong dislike for almost every other autistic person I encounter (besides my own family members). Especially the gender-special/tumblr/Reddit types. I suspect a lot of them are fakers, which I’m not allowed to openly comment on because every self-diagnosis is valid. Imo the ones who deny that autism has become some weird fucking loser trend are the ones who need to be side-eyed. I might be able to get along with the autists here If we met irl though. imo just being an active user here means we have pretty similar ways of viewing the world, even if there’s constant infighting kek. I’m just tired of having annoying interactions

No. 1672707

>>1672682
I was just coming here to comment something similar. I strongly dislike what can be called "online autists", bonus if they're doing any kind of activism (be it for autism, trans, anything really).
One thing I've noticed is that "online autists" are typically focusing their ideas outwardly, just like the rest of social media they dwell on. And they rarely present with real autistic problems, but I'll give them a pass because I can't see how they really act. They insist that you and everyone else must use pronouns, hate JKR, be against people who want to "cure" autism… whatever they have all collectively decided is correct.

But then the irl autists nearly always focus on themselves only. They'll be perfectly fine with everyone else doing weird or incorrect things but they'll be particular about their own wants and needs. For example they won't touch any food that's not dry, or they'll wear a thick winter jacket even in summer, and they couldn't give a shit about pronouns but it's not even to be rude, they just don't get it and don't care to. Even the ones who have objectively annoying traits aren't ever as bad as the online autists.

I used to be friends with an autist/ADHD guy. Because I met him irl I thought he'd be like the other autists I knew but he just wasn't. I quickly found out he's a reddit/discord gamer who barely leaves the apartment, and it all made sense then. He was an online autist, I just happened to meet him irl.

No. 1672972

>>1672707
What bothers me is their total denial of anything wrong with the way autism is presented online in the past few years. How many random people misrepresent symptoms. People will film themselves “stimming” and post it for likes and attention. The “autistic women” spaces are filled with trannies that are constantly language policing. They act like calling out any tiny thing is bullying. But nah, Autism Speaks and people with puzzle piece tattoos are the real enemy because someone else said so! It’s a truly miserable community online.

No. 1675689

>>1672972
>What bothers me is their total denial of anything wrong with the way autism is presented online in the past few years.
God yes. I've met a lot of autists through being in various support groups and whatnot, yet I've only met a single one who genuinely hand-flapped to stim. He also had a mental disability that made him unable to even speak coherently, don't know if that was actually related but it made me associate that action with lower functioning capacity. You want me to believe EVERY super-high-functioning autist online suddenly hand flaps as their stim?
It's such a stark difference between talking to real autists and seeing the "autists" online. Online everyone is afraid of the word "asperger" and will call it a "red flag" if someone uses it, while autists I meet in person will literally not give a fuck even when some poor autist-ally tries to explain what a bad nazi man Hans Asperger was. I love how directly they'll say "what the fuck does that have to do with me, stop being an idiot" to the poor ally who can't handle real blunt autism.

No. 1675707

>>1672972
Speaking of trannies I'm really pissed that "autistic women" spaces also have to include TIMs and you cannot even discuss the intersection of autism and female socialization without being called a "terf"

No. 1675726

>>1675707
They also all have that uniquely male autistic entitlement that no autistic woman would ever have. It's honestly baffling how much male autists get cuddled while women are lambasted for having a weird hobby (unless they look like e-girls and then they just get sexually harassed instead)

No. 1675757

>>1675707
Autistic women need to stand up for ourselves and make female only autist spaces. Tifs can join only if they admit they're still female and can't ever be male. Tons of us are terfs so it's almost shocking there aren't more terfy autist spaces

No. 1675765

>>1675689
I hand-flapped as a child, and when I went to school I got instantly bullied for it like on my first day. Haven't flapped since at least in public. I suspect online autists fixate on stimming precisely because they don't have autism and stimming is the kind of easily visible trait they can mimick and make a show out of. They also treat it like it's a tick like with tourette's as in you HAVE to do it, when actually most HF autists can stop stimming at will.

No. 1675773

Do any anons have problems with keeping jobs? It's not the work itself that is stressing me the most, it's everything else around it, mainly office politics and communication with coworkers, the small talk, etc. I keep working for 1.5 year the longest then take a break for a few months, rinse and repeat. I'm neeting on my own resources so I can't neet forever nor do I wish to but fuck, why is it so hard to find extremely solitary jobs that pay somewhat decent?

No. 1675776

>>1675765
I compulsively say words or phrases when alone, the same ones for years with only slight modifications. My mom did the same at home but didnt filter from family kek. Always thought it was weird of her but now I do it too, but hide it even at home. I flapped too when little but havent in a looong time, now I 'save up' and flap my foot or shake my leg at night when laying down. Sometimes move my leg back and forth slower than a shake.

No. 1675777

>>1675776
Nta but while I've never hand flapped I do the leg thing too sometimes. But only at home.
I had no idea flapping existed before tumblr/tiktok.

No. 1675778

>>1675765
I used to repeat phrases silently with my mouth after saying them and one time a friend noticed and pointed out and I stopped doing it in public forever kek they really think we have no control whatsoever. Although I still do it sometimes in private. (I'm ADHD diagnosed but not autist if that matters)

No. 1675793

>>1675773
I quit my job when employed by someone else/ company cyclically about every 18 months too kek. I went into temp work in the past couple years, doing a merchandising project and light remodelling for big chain stores as an independant contractor. So a project might last a week or 2 months, and you pick which ones to do. That sat much better with me. Pay is shit, but everywhere pay is shit. I like making things. I now am self employed making even less, but I do love it. If my Nigel weren't bringing in decent money I would be back doing temp work again. I am very lucky. You might look into something like that, depending on where you are in the world. Brand ambassador stuff pays decent too but you do have to try to talk to people. It's scripted,or at least easy to form a 'script' of your own,so if you can repeat the same type of convo over and over to people, that type of job exists and you work with an agency. Pick and choose when you want to work and the projects are usually one day things or sometimes 3 or 4 days at a convention. Basically handing out coupons and samples and pretending that X Energy Drink really did give me wings earlier, they just wore off before you got here…kek. I worked as a temp in various factories too, so when I was burnt out I would just move to another.

No. 1675804

>>1675757
>tons of us are terfs
Yeah I feel like troonery and autism really dont actually go together despite autistic trans people being a majority of trans… it makes zero sense that gender is a spectrum and much more sense that male and female exist considering black and white thinking. Idk, I guess it also makes sense that an autistic person who doesnt fit into their gender's stereotype would not be able to accept that they are still that gender/sex? I went through that phase thinking I wanted to be a boy when I was a kid because I am stereotypically more masculine in my interests and interpersonal relationships, and I was treated wrongly for it in my misogynistic family…. but I realized probably by age 10 to 12 or so that the problem was around me not inside of me. I suspect lower functioning autistics go with trans more often than higher. But also a lot of autistic trans really arent autistic, just emotionally traumatized trying to figure out something that explains why they are having a hard time in this world. Leaving out the agps here, dont wanna even mess with them.

No. 1675806

>>1675777
>>1675776
I am glad I am not alone in this kek

No. 1675814

>>1675804
I absolutely feel that if I were born a few years later and got into tumblr at that younger age with the brewing genderspecial stuff, I would have fallen into it too. I mean from an autistic perspective, you essentially get a perfect explanation as to why you never were able to fit in. You were just trans! Or nonbinary! You aren't socially retarded, you instead get this perfectly encapsulated explanation.

No. 1675819

>>1675814
Ayrt yeah I think if I were younger I probably would have trooned out too if I was able to access tumblr etc. But at least I did grow out of it soon enough. Maybe I wouldnt have if I knew about trans stuff and accepted it as real. This is why I hate this movement so much, it is straight up dangerous.

No. 1675841

>>1675793
I'm really glad that you managed to find to make things work out. That type of work is sadly not available where I am but I'll hopefully find a way myself.

No. 1676122

>>1675804
>Yeah I feel like troonery and autism really dont actually go together despite autistic trans people being a majority of trans
I think statistically it's only about 10% at most of all trans people who are autistic, but compared to it being 2% of the population it's a lot more than it "should" be. I think it's more that autists easier fall victim to it, making it seem like all the autists you see identify as trans in some form. But the again, autists are also more likely to peak and become terfs!

No. 1676124

>>1675814
Absolutely and I agree with >>1675819 that I was close to trooning out from tumblr. The thing that saved me was partly autism. I had autism in the family and strongly suspected I was an autist too so my explanation instead of "i don't fit in so i must be a boy" became "ah fuck i might be autistic", which was later confirmed by experts. If I wasn't lucky enough to know a lot of details about autism from my family I probably would have trooned out.

No. 1677253

File: 1693004297839.jpg (49.86 KB, 622x460, 20230814_204935.jpg)

Do any adhd nonas hate their hyperfixations? I tend to hyperfixate on certain media/characters for weeks and spend entire days only thinking about the current thing until I get so tired and scream at myself mentally to just. STOP. It's to the point where I tend to actively avoid getting into new fandoms and only pick up things that will be mentally stimulating enough to distract me but just boring enough to avoid being hyperfixated on. Do you have any tips to distract yourself from the current new obsession? Is there any healthy way to avoid the burn out and the void that settles in after you consumed everything there is to consume on certain media and fandom? God, I wish I was a normal fucking functioning adult

No. 1677751

I finally got my autism diagnosis at 28 and I'm crying like a bich. Now my family can officially go fuck itself
>durr you can't be autistic because you talk, my neighbour has an autistic daughter and she doesn't talk at all!
God damn it I had to suffer through so much degradation in my childhood and adolescence. I remember being totally mute in stressful situations and a doctor asking my mother if I'm a 'special needs' kid and my mother telling me to stop behaving 'like a retard'. And then they were telling me I can perfectly control how I behave and I just choose not to behave because I'm lazy and evil. Fuck them all

No. 1677756

>>1677751
Ah yes, the usual "I'm autistic/adhd!some other trendy mental illness! Therefore, I am now allowed to act like an asshole and fuck off to anyone telling me to improve myself!!"

Geeze. By the way, sorry to break it up to you, but literally ANYONE can get an autism diagnosis these days. Just find the right quack and pay the right fee.

No. 1677757

>>1677756
Being mute and sitting alone in a corner instead of playing with other kids is 'acting like an asshole'? I never acted like an asshole to people. I was abused for no reason, just being there and trying not to interact with anyone. You have brainrot from all those tiktoks

No. 1677758

>>1677751
>And then they were telling me I can perfectly control how I behave and I just choose not to behave because I'm lazy and evil.
Jesus nona what an awful family. I would go no-contact with that kind of family but given the autism it might be harder to live alone.

No. 1677759

>>1677757
Yes, it's still acting like an asshole. And look how you're playing the victim. "I did nothing wrong! I just sat there being mute!". And what where you expecting? For everyone else to accomodate your behaviour? Society is going downhill because too many people are entitled manchildren (or in your case, womanchild) and think the entire world revolves around them. That's now how it works. If you're weird, mute, or can't behave and function in society, society is NOT supposed to bend over to you.
Your family was trying to teach you that, instead you're fighting tooth and nails to convince the world you deserve a sort of special treatment. Newsflash: you don't. It doesn't matter if you have any alleged mental or physical issue: that doesn't mean you are entitled to anything. There's the guy who lost his leg and spends his life whining about his disability and living off welfare, and then there's the guy who lost his leg and found a good normal job and joined the paralympics. You seem to be the first category.(infighting)

No. 1677760

>>1677757
Don't know what other anon was getting at, you didn't come off as one of the quirky fakers to me.

No. 1677761

>>1677759
nta, what's your problem anon? You seem to be projecting a lot of anger for no reason other than a person having been recently diagnosed

No. 1677762

>>1677761
My anger comes from having seen WAY too many cases of completely entitled, spoiled, immature individuals who don't want to grow up and get some random "mental illness" diagnosed. I've seen a kid diagnosed of dyscalculia. He was better than me at maths, but he hated doing homework. He got a legit dyscalculia diagnosis. When I got him to do his homework without any electronic calculator aid, and he actually did it all correct, his mom started screeching at me.

No. 1677767

>>1677759
You're saying "disabled people aren't really affected by their disabilities and can overcome them by just working harder". That's a common ableist way of thinking but it's typically not true at all. Most (real) autists strive to become better while the fakers are the ones who parade around on tiktok saying the world needs to cater to them. I didn't get that from the other anon, she just seemed upset over past mistreatment.
>>1677762
Dyscalculia becuase you don't like doing math and autism because you're legit socially retarded are not the same thing though. You're assuming anon isn't actually autistic based only on the fact that her family told her to stop acting retarded, wheras that kids mom the one pushing the diagnosis onto the kid.

No. 1677768

>>1677759
>And what where you expecting?
I had no 'expectations' as a 6 or 10 year old. I literally didn't think about it in those categories.
Yes yes anon, all the week should die, we should let all the retarded people die out and every disabled person to become homeless because they can't care of themselves, the weak should fear the strong etc.

I can work, I pay taxes. I contribute in that regard like most average normies. I also prefer to be alone. I feel hurt for being bullied for no reason as a kid meanwhile the aggressive and mean boys who bullied weak shy kids (not just me) never got the treatment I received. My family was abusive in general, like you know, hiding generational abuse from alcoholics, sexual abusers and narcissistic mothers. Do you think people like this genuinely try to 'reach out' to an autistic kid? Come on

No. 1677770

>>1677761
So, alcoholics, sexual abusers, narcissistic mothers…. you forgot drug users I think. Poor you, a delicate and pure flower coming from such a horrible, horrible family.
I've seen real damaged families. I'm going out on a limb and assume yours is not one. Especially when they try to give you a wakeup call by calling you lazy and evil.
No, the weak don't deserve to die, pal. The weak need to discover they can be strong too. Life's a jungle. Welcome to the adult world.(infighting)

No. 1677773

>>1677770
Sounds like a legit troll

No. 1677774

>>1677770
You're replying to the wrong anon now kek are you perhaps drunk?
MY family is really great, bunch of high functioning autists with cool nerdy jobs

No. 1677775

>>1677773
I'm used to being called that for trying to tell people the truth instead of indulging in their delusions. Being called a troll on the internet is still better than screeching parents.

No. 1677776

>>1677774
Aren't you the one who said "fuck them all" to you family? Maybe I misquoted.

No. 1677779

>>1677775
You accuse other anon of being "the lazy disabled person" stereotype, yet you yourself is the "bitter blackpilled autist" stereotype yourself

No. 1677783

>>1677779
I don't even know what's the "bitter blackpilled autist", but if you mean a socially awkward and shy person who eventually overcame her weaknesses and wants to help others, I guess maybe yes. Heck, I bet if I were in the USA I'd be diagnosed as autistic too. Doesn't make any difference to who I am.

No. 1677787

>>1677776
Nope, I'm the one who asked >>1677761

No. 1677788

>>1677775
I don't disagree with what you're saying, but it seems pretty unrelated to OP's post, she's never said she wants special treatment as an adult

No. 1677790

>>1677770
>you forgot drug users I think
Alcohol is technically defined as a depressant and generally considered as a drug though.
>The weak need to discover they can be strong too
I left my country to work abroad and traumatized myself into working in a noisy environment for 2 years, puking and shitting from stress basically every day, because I couldn't handle being around that many people and in an environment that was too overstimulating for me. I never lived off welfare. I strive to be 'better'. I also wasted many, many years on therapy and medical drugs that didn't do anything. But it sounds like to you better means more sociable but not everyone has to be sociable. I have the right to feel hurt for being abused by my family, who at the same time abused each other

No. 1677792

>>1677783
>Heck, I bet if I were in the USA I'd be diagnosed as autistic too.
So you're not even a diagnosed autist huh and I'm guessing you've then had none of the autism specific therapy that helps autists cope and deal with their autistic problems
>wants to help others
Assuming you're being genuine, what you're doing isn't helping anyone. You're being needlessly aggressive for no reason to assert your own view that some sort of vague "working hard" is the only solution to every problem. You have no idea what other anon will be doing to overcome the problems that stem from her autism or how hard she's worked in the past.

No. 1677801

>>1676124
Pretty much all autistic women I have known have been either TIFs or staunchly GC (including former TIFs)

No. 1677803

>>1677783
How old are you? I'm guessing at least 50.

No. 1677812

>>1677792
Well, I could find a random quack to get an autism diagnosis…. if I wanted to use it as a weapon to get special treatment. But I don't care. I don't need or want a "I'm spechul" card. Besides, these days, the real special individual is the one who does NOT have any mental illness diagnosed.

No. 1677814

>>1677803
Sweetie, I sure hope you're not going for the moid-style "dhurr hurr if you're an old woman you're irrelevant". Creepy. If anything, age makes me more experienced, little kid.

No. 1677845

>>1677812
kek you sound immature. If you are not autistic what are you doing ITT? Of course you wouldn't understand the experience of completely freezing up in a social situation, while knowing you shouldn't behave that way because otherwise people are going to think you're retarded but still being unable to change your behaviour. (Been there, done that, sucks being a non-retarded autistic kid with enough self awareness to notice you're doing wrong but lacking the skills to actually function).

No. 1677847

>>1677812
I don't know about others, I can only speak for myself, also because you jumped at me for no reason other than talking about autism diagnosis in a literal ASD thread: it's still pretty hard to get diagnosed in my country, they don't give away diagnoses as easily as you claim it's happening in America, my psychologist wanted to evaluate me, also she works with other diagnosed adult autists and had autistic students at Uni. I don't want to use this diagnosis for anything and I don't want anyone at my work to know about it. I wanted to know for myself. Literally nobody irl except me and people who diagnosed me know about this diagnosis and I won't use it as a 'weapon'. I don't even know what I could use it for kek

No. 1677850

>>1677814
>"dhurr hurr if you're an old woman you're irrelevant"
You're irrelevant because you haven't posted anything relevant in a thread about the experiences of autistic women.

No. 1677926

>>1677845
EVERYBODY knows the experience of freezing up in a social situation. Newsflash: you're not special.(infighting)

No. 1678208

>>1677812
So in conclusion:
>You're not diagnosed
>You think only a quack could diagnose you
>You think a diagnosis is just something people get to receive unfair special treatment they don't actually deserve
>You don't need a diagnosis because you don't struggle with the symptoms of autism
>You think autism is cured/bettered by just working hard, on your own and without professional support
>You think kids today are just spoiled and receive any diagnosis they want just for asking for it
>You think it's helping autists to call them lazy and evil
I mean this in the nicest way possible: If you think others will turn out fine through getting constant abuse from "the real adult world" because that's what happend to you and you turned out fine… then you did in fact not turn out fine yourself. And I'm sorry about that.

No. 1678225

I'm genuinely not trying to start another fight in here but sometimes you see people who are jaded and spiteful (and possibly older, but not always) and they insist you do things their way because "that's what worked for them". And all you can think about is how much you do NOT want to end up jaded and spiteful like them.

I feel that way from seeing other autists or mentally ill people online sometimes, whether it's them acting spoiled, entitled, selfish, aggressive, etc. At this point all it does is remind me to work on myself to not let myself end up like that, it's one of the reasons I like browsing LC.

No. 1679636

Bumping this thread for the nona in the fakeboi thread.
>do any other autist nonnies do something incredibly autistic, think about how autistic it was, but can’t stop doing it?
Kek, yes. I always interrupt people when they mispronounce something or state something that is false and correct them. I know it's super annoying and I can come off as very condescending, and yet I still. Fucking. Do it. Every time!

No. 1679650

>>1679636
ugh nona you are a blessing. and YES i do that too! i almost got banned from a discord server because i was too blunt about a girl’s artwork (it was shit and i was honest!) and corrected her because she called a figure drawing a gesture drawing. i get super autistic about the things that mean the most to me, which is like cats, art and crocheting. literally the world could end tomorrow and if i had those three i’d be completely set. or like i literally don’t know how to read the room or make the right facial expressions so everyone says i’m super scary and intimidating. or the constant fucking fidgeting and the texture problems and loud places i fucking freeeeze in crowds! the nona in the fakeboi thread put it so perfectly when she said that high functioning autism is like being so close to the life you want to lead but not being able to. i always wanted to be a social butterfly and a party girl and on the surface i looked like it, but i would never have fun and struggled to connect with anyone so hard and ended up becoming an addict (something that i’ve learned autistic people are more prone to). i really relate to when autists say that it’s like living life but everyone else has a guidebook to how to social interact and do things but you got stuck without one. i’m fucking 20 and i still call my mom every time i need to make a decision. but, i’m happier now with my one autistic best friend and my cat, to be honest! i literally looked to every other diagnosis that exists because i was so terrified as being labelled as autistic. but now i think the doctors were right at the beginning, like 10 years ago lol.

No. 1679679

"Teeh-eeeh I correct people when they mispell! I'm so autistic!"
"Eheheheeh, I like relaxing at home with my pets and at the old, mature, ripe age of 20 years old I still phone my parents! So autistic!"

This thread disgusts me. Perfectly normal kids telling each other how "autistic" they are when they do perfectly normal things. It's an offense to genuine mental illnesses.

What is this, Tumblr?(retarded bait)

No. 1679680

Are autists more jumpy or is this just my problem? Not being able to handle horror films is one thing, I know that's not uncommon, but I'm jumpy to the point sometimes people walking in by flying the door open or a phone ringing makes me jump in my chair. Fortunately people haven't commented on it, but it makes me feel quite silly. It's especially bad if I'm deeply focused on reading/writing an e-mail and then someone maybe calls out my name very loud from behind my back, it literally activates my fight or flight response.

No. 1679681

>>1679680
Yes, yes, it's absolutely a sign of autism. If you cry to a dramatic movie, that too, is autistic. If you like pop music, it's a common sign of autism as well.

No. 1679690

>>1679680
Yeah but I didn't think it specifically had anything to do with autism… I've noticed that I have more sensitive hearing than most people so I just hear every little thing. I also can recognize people by the sound of their footsteps. Idk. Sounds can distract me unless it's the music in my headphones lol.

No. 1679691

>>1679650
AYRT, and we sound quite similar, kek. When I was in a gaming fandom years ago, I was that "well ACKSHULLY" nerd correcting everyone on the canon and knowing way too much about the minutiae of the story. I ended up accidentally insulting some other fans when they asked me how their fanfic was, and I said the characterisation was way off and they basically destroyed the established canon just to make the two male leads fuck, KEK. I didn't realise that you're basically meant to lie in that situation and act like it's good. Normal people are so fucking weird for that, honestly. I also love cats and ended up as an addict when I was trying to be social. I'm in recovery for heroin (and other opioids) and booze. I actually met my wife who is also autistic through AA and NA. On the surface, marriage can make me almost normie passing, but my marriage only works because I married a fellow sperg. We naturally clicked together without any lengthy explanations about why we are the way we are. Well, obviously we talked about our habits and how to get our lives in sync, but it wasn't like the seminars I had to give in previous relationships. I also live a pretty lowkey life. Most of my hobbies are solitary or something I do with my wife. We've settled into a really nice pace of life where we both have the routine that we need so badly but we also do try to work on ourselves so we don't become jaded and bitter like >>1678225 mentioned. I'm glad you're happy though, nona! I think the one "good" thing about autism is that we're often genuinely happy with what others would deem a "boring" life. It took me a while to shake loose the "I must socialise and pretend I'm normal" shackles, but I'm glad I did. Life is great now.

>>1679680
I've always been quite twitchy and go full retard if my routine gets thrown off. I used to be quite hyper vigilant about anything that could disturb it - phone calls, emails, people visiting, etc - but I've tried working on stopping that behaviour with limited success. I hate the unknown to the extent that I'll put off watching new films/tv shows, playing new games or reading new books because they're unfamiliar to me, and unfamiliarity = mental discomfort for me. I do go into fight or flight quite easily, but I think that's mostly my PTSD.

No. 1679695

I used to nitpick children's movies when I was like 9 years old and I remember specifically shitting on The Lion King in front of a girl who was a huge TLK fan and I did it to the point she was visibly upset and sad kek. But I just couldn't understand how the animals that have their children eaten by lions every day go to this presentation of the offspring of this one specific lion who is nor the biggest nor the strongest nor the fastest animal in their environment and also eats other animals, it was totally illogical to me and it made me angry. I remember cringing hard at the Circle of life intro and telling my mom to turn it off

No. 1679708

>>1679695
Damn you sound like you were a little turd kek

No. 1679720

>>1679708
I was
>>1679691
>I used to be quite hyper vigilant about anything that could disturb it - phone calls, emails, people visiting, etc
Damn that's resonating with me. I got hysterical every time we had guests, I would hide under the table and scream etc. I also didn't like my own birthdays because of that reason and I would hide in a wardrobe because that was the only quiet place, and when I got a little older I would just run away from the house to the garden. I also hated the sound of the phone ringing, it was extremely stressful, especially when we still had a landline phone. After a while I just started to disconect it from the cable kek so nobody could call us and my mom was furious with me. I liked to walk around the table in our living room for hours and nobody could stop me from doing this, I also used to headbang against the wall a lot when I was overstimulated and back then the family doctor told my mom I would just grow out of this. Yeah sure… Now I just hit my head with my fist and only when I know nobody sees me and it still helps

No. 1679740

>>1679720
AYRT and I also used to hit my head on the wall as a kid when overstimulated. As I grew up, I shifted to open palm slapping my head with both hands, but had to stop that after having a brain tumour removed. It took much longer then it should've to quit though, gave myself a lot of horrible headaches in the process. I've got a heavy bag in my garage that stays up 24/7 now, so I can go to town on it whenever I'm overstimulated. It's not a perfect cure though, as I often punch walls in true 'tard rage fashion. I can't explain why, but that sharp feeling of pain is just so soothing and relaxing to me. It's like a bunch of valium washed down with whisky, but it goes straight to my brain and calms me down.

No. 1680153

>>1679691
AYRT, it is such a breath of fresh air to hear someone like me living a happy life! i hope all is well for you and your wife, that’s literally my dream.

>>1679679
respectfully nona, do you have reading comprehension skills? i literally said that doctors wanted to diagnose me with autism since i was young but me (and my parents) were against it. it’s not that i call my mom every once in a while, it’s that i lack independence. i lack social skills. i sperg out about fucking 17th century art specifically. like honestly, do you want people to be in this thread saying how they have an autistic meltdown in the grocery store because the crackers got moved slightly to the left? or because the mailman talked to them for 5 minutes too long and now their routine got thrown off completely? i know we hate the tiktok and troon munchies that glorify autism, but let’s remember what the female symptoms of autism are. https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/women-autism-spectrum-disorder/202104/10-key-signs-autism-in-women

No. 1680167

>>1679695
We would've been best friends nona, I couldn't fucking stand Lion King as a child. I hated many other Disney movies too, and stuck to watching my favorites over and over again (Monsters Inc. and Time machine kek, it's not like I had a super cultured taste)

No. 1680752

Cannot believe i am hyperfixating on perfume. I guess its better than a criminal from the 1800s.

No. 1681364

>>1679695
I didn't mind fantastical elements in movies for the most part, I instead nitpicked people who nitpicked the movies lmao
Because to me it was ridiculous when someone would complain on just one unrealistic aspect but then not ALL of them. Like using your example say when someone was just mad that the lions presented their baby to the other animals and them caring didn't make sense, but then they would be fine with the basic premise of "talking lions". That sort of inconsistency bothered me more than the movies. To me you would either accept the world of talking lions being unrealistic by default, or you should expect it to be a fictional but mostly accurate nature documentary.

I did specifically dislike most disney movies (and other musicals) because to me it didn't make sense that they kept singing in the middle of everything. I always thought the songs were bad, with (very) few exclusions because I hated "kids songs" in general and felt they were dumb and demeaning. Whenever I was watching a disney movie on my own I'd just fast-forward through the songs.

No. 1681376

What's a weird possibly-autism thing you nonas do that you didn't know was possibly from autism at first?

I'm trying to phrase it in a neutral way so people don't do the tiktok thing of "omg I also do X so I must be autistic too" or to say that the thing is 100% caused by autism. Just quirks you do that you realized could be related to autism that you didn't think about before.

My own example is I would often look up the etymology and origins of words, often related to their "literal" meaning or me questioning the use of prepositional words in different situations. I often ended up only finding answers to the same question on quite obscure asperger specific forums. It started in my "I'm not autistic at all" denial phase so it used to piss me off back then. By now I've just accepted I'm a sperg kek
And as a second question, did anyone else have a denial phase?

No. 1681431

>>1681376
>What's a weird possibly-autism thing you nonas do that you didn't know was possibly from autism at first?
T-rex hands

No. 1681575

File: 1693318982718.gif (2.71 MB, 480x270, trex.gif)

>>1681431
You mean these bad boys?

No. 1681588

>>1681376
When I was little: Quoting lines from movies or shows without really knowing what they meant to try to script out irl conversations.
Apparently it's a common autistic trait to mimic words and phrases without understanding their meaning but just because it's associated with the situation playing out that one has seen from media before.

No. 1681625

>>1681376
Getting overstimulated by my own hair kek
If it gets tangled or won't cooperate I get really upset and have a bit of a meltdown which usually involves me hitting myself in the head with the brush a few times. It also drives me crazy when it's even the slightest bit greasy, it's all I can focus on all day until I can get home and wash it. I know it sounds extra retarded when I type it out like that but I can't help it kek. I hated brushing my hair as a child too because it would get tangled easily and was always really painful for me when my mum would try to comb it out so I avoided it all together.

As for denial? Nope, only within the past year or two I've slowly come to realize I'm somewhere on the spectrum or an aspie. To me it feels good knowing there's most likely a reason why I feel so behind other people my age. Also, it reminds me that I shouldn't get sad and compare myself to them because I'm not really normal and never will be.

No. 1681929

>>1681376
Cataloguing random shit for no real purpose other than the joy of writing out my silly little lists. I collected toy cars when I was little and had a notebook full of their make, model, BHP, etc. I would then pit my toy cars against each other in imaginary races and I would write up how I thought it would go. I loved thinking about different terrains, FWD vs RWD vs 4WD and all the little details that would affect the races. I tracked sport statistics in a similar fashion, which has actually turned into a career for me, and when I started playing video games I would "get into the mind of the character" and plot the most realistic playthrough. I actually still do that one now, kek. I just love facts and statistics and making predictions based off them. I just thought it meant I was a mega nerd (which, ok, is true), I didn't realise that until a few years after my diagnosis that a lot of other autists also do similar things.

No. 1682490

>>1446262
the worst person I knew in the lolcow discord before it was taken down told everyone she was autistic. easily one of the worst people I've ever had the displeasure of knowing online but also liked to act like and call herself a Stacy.

No. 1682559

>>1681376
This is a rather common one but I used to pretend to laugh along my classmates so they wouldn't laugh at me for not understanding a joke. Now I just suck it up and look really stupid in front of my friends. I accidentally thought a friend was antivaxx recently in a misreading/understanding.

No. 1682560

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No. 1683195

>>1677751
>my mother telling me to stop behaving 'like a retard'.


Fuck anon are you me? I remember before I got my diagnosis, my "mother" used to tell me all the time before social events to not go inside and act like a retard. Her exact words were always " don't be in here acting like you're retarded". I remember it always feeling pretty bad. I couldn't help that I would go mute and not know what to say. My brother used to say the same thing to me. I never understood what they meant and to this day I don't understand why they would say that to a child, especially a "loved one". Honestly fuck our families and I hope you're doing better without them!

No. 1686067

I fucking hate talking nonnies. My language skills are getting progressively worse because I get so burnt out just trying to put my feelings into words. articulating myself and trying to get all the information from my brain that I want out is getting so exhausting. I hate speaking. I used to be a fantastic writer and my uni professors were impressed, but now I cant write for shit because I get so tired just trying to get the right words out. I am at the point where I don’t want friends and I don’t care about loneliness anymore because I loathe the idea of having to talk

No. 1686646

You know how many posts about autism go something like

> Not everyone with autism is a cold, monotone, intelligent individual who dresses masculine and likes stem! That’s just a stereotype of white little boys! Girls with autism like boy bands and horses!


As someone who does kinda fit that description, it feels alienating that “autism in women” books tend to assume that women can’t possibly relate or be like “typical” autism cases. So there’s not that much support for women who have a different variety of autism who are then punished for it in society because we didn’t or couldn’t mask. I think studying atypical autism and autistic presentation in girls is important but it’s become it’s own thing where there’s now a “girl” autism that’s assumed to be milder.



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