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No. 2444802
This thread is for voluntary NEETs who wish to keep up this lifestyle, or are not ready to reintegrate into society yet. NEET stands for Not in Employment, Education or Training, having little/no active social life does not make you a NEET.
Previous thread:
>>>/ot/859842This is not a place for ex-NEETs, those attempting to return to society, or those who wish to. Here is the link to the current recovering NEET thread: >>>/ot/1714003Some topics to discuss may include:
>How you earn or spend NEETbux>Ways you spend your free time>Opinions of others and how you feel>The positive and negatives that come with NEETdomBe considerate of others and refrain from shaming or sharing opinions that are not relevant here.
No. 2448285
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How many chronically online shut ins do you think exist in the general population? Like in a population of 100 people?
i feel like covid caused a mass extinction event of normies by forcing them to spend more time online then they naturally would, destroying their friendships, relationships, jobs, etc, which isolated them, and thus spending time online the internet and going places they otherwise wouldnt has exposed them to retarded ideology and autistic gamma rays.
Do people still go outside and socialize with strangers face to face the way they used to?
Maybe it’s because i been a hiki NEET for 2 years since graduating HS but for some reason I find it hard to believe normal people exist anymore since I see the world through the warped lens of the internet.
Im in the USA if it matters.
No. 2448636
>>2448565But you don’t feel bad about being NEET?
I struggled more in adulthood too and also have a brother. I just hope I can live on my own. Decorate my house the way I want. Have peace that I don’t have to live at home.
No. 2452217
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Many people work hard and still live paycheck to paycheck. Nightmare fuel. I'm lucky that I have a good family.
No. 2458708
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No. 2459643
>>2459627Unfortunately I'm a big retard so even if I wanted to be productive during all my free time, I mostly struggle with trying to make myself do even basic shit. I can answer your question about disability checks though.
Off social security disability payments, which increase or decrease depending on where you live to account for cost of living (what a joke haha), I still need other benefits to make it work. Primarily food stamps, I would be kind of fucked without them. There are also apartment units with reduced rent set aside for those who are disabled/elderly, and you need your benefit statement as proof you are on SSI/SSDI so you qualify to rent there. However, since there are never enough of these units built, the waitlists are years and years long. And a lot of the residents don't move out unless they become unable to be left alone, or die. When I'm not renting in these kinds of units, I'm living with family.
I have never worked. I was declared disabled when I turned 18, before I finished high school.
I do not ever plan to work a normal job, for many reasons which all add up to being unable to perform at a normal job. If I ever escape being on benefits or the charity of my family, it will be because I found something niche that allows me to go at my own pace from home, or on commission. I have a few plans for this, but it's a toss up whether they'll pan out. I've accepted this after many years of grief, it is what it is.
If you thrive off of leaving the house and interacting with people, this life will probably make you want to die. You are pretty broke, so you have to be okay with being a homebody. If you're okay with that, it's hard to get bored. I have an internet connection, my issue is pulling myself away from the internet or sleeping for long enough to be productive. I have started so many retarded projects and hobbies just because I could. Even if I get sick enough to be bedbound, I can pull up lolcow threads on my phone and let the hours go by.
Your biggest enemy will be "lack of enrichment". You gotta shower, you gotta get out of bed and walk outside sometimes, you gotta put down your week long Netflix binge and read a book. You need to mix things up semi-regularly so you don't start feeling dull and depressed. It's the #1 trap of being a NEET, in my opinion, you have to be on point and not let yourself fall into a ditch.
No. 2459662
>>2459656I think. Maybe those high functioning autists have something else wrong with them. Even at my most mentally ill I wasn't wasting time getting into retarded internet arguments, much less about troons.
The situation about being married giving you less benefits is true in the US as well. It's why disability rights activists have "the right to marry" as one of their talking points. You will be forced to rely on your spouse or family members if you try to be on disability and married, which then leads to increased rates of domestic violence against the disabled. I should have clarified in my response, but the other disability benefits like food stamps and reduced rent keep me from having to rely on family. Which is good, because if my parents die when I need to rely on them, I'm totally fucked.
Sorry I couldn't answer your questions more in depth since I am amerifag, hopefully someone else with more helpful info will be by soon.
No. 2459669
>>2459662>Even at my most mentally ill I wasn't wasting time getting into retarded internet arguments, much less about troons.We're all nerdy late millennial women in Europe so tbh some of my friends care too much about this topic without even being autistic. I think in the case of the two women I'm talking about it's really just that they were on tumblr and twitter as teenagers and then young adults to talk about fandoms and arguing on the internet became their new special interest later. If we were zoomers maybe things would have been different because we would have been exposed to different information and opinions, I believe it's a matter of wrong time and wrong place here. They both were diagnosed a few years ago as adults too. One of my close friends is a neet too and she does the same thing but she has anxiety on top of that and has been doing a lot better since she started taking antidepressants recently so maybe you're right and they all have both issues at the same time or something similar.
>Sorry I couldn't answer your questions more in depth since I am amerifagNo need to apologize, I just want to have personal experiences and opinions so I can see what I should do next before my job gives me a mental breakdown and I suspect I should try and be a neet for some time to "recover" and use my free time on hobbies.
No. 2468420
>>2468071Maybe retarded of me, but the way you described your neet situation made me feel a lot better.
My neetbux were recently cut off and I'm in a long appeal process. I would have been homeless were it not for my dad and stepmom helping me move out of my apartment and taking me back in. I've been feeling so awful about it, but something about "warm in my room, playing minecraft" makes it feel less like the end of the world.
No. 2492477
>>2459627>have you ever worked? If yes, did you quit, were you fired, did you last contract simply end on a set date?Yeah. My job gave me some awards for being decent? I got sick and had to go to the ER and they didn't rehire me. It was a fall job, around Black Friday, back when it was hell.
>are you earning unemployment benefits? If you're disabled, are you earning disability benefits instead? Is it enough or do you need a bf/husband or parents to financially help?Disabled. My disability isn't even enough to buy me food because I pay 1/3rd the rent with it. My mom does the heavy lifting with her retirement funds.
>do you plan to stay a neet for as long as possible or do you maybe plan on staying one for a specific amount of time? (example, my big sister only accepts job contracts for 6 months or a year at most and doesn't do shit until she can't earn unemployement benefits anymore on purpose so she can have as much free time as possible)I want to not be a NEET but there are more reasons to stay one than not. My mom's a bit… irresponsible since I have a disability and need her for assistance at times, so moving out would benefit me. I just can't because the symptoms are getting worse and it apparently isn't accepted as a diagnosis by real doctors kek. I make money by being a digital artist, but my unwillingness to draw NSFW has netted me absolutely nothing in the past 6 months. (2 were used to recover from a surgery, and I just hopped accounts to dodge horny commissions). I think beliving I'm going to "make it" is holding me back from ditching art all together.
>do you still keep yourself busy during your free time or are you bored most of the time?I spend 24/7 drawing and studying art. I'm not amazing but I would like to think my dedication to it is worth something. I don't know the last time I was ever bored.
No. 2492820
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I quit college and i became a NEET again. Seeing someone achieve everything i wanted in front of me with ease while i failed miserably despite trying my best made me realize that nothing will improve. I am tired of seeing prettier, more intelligent women achieve things i want with ease while i fail again and again. It is what it is, i cant change my destiny. Might as well enjoy a few years of happiness then off myself with dignity than spend my life trying to chase after a dream that will never become real.
No. 2492822
>have you ever worked? If yes, did you quit, were you fired, did you last contract simply end on a set date?
I worked a ton of jobs. I volunteered when I was 13-16 and started a wage job at 14 and did various random things for money. I was very money-making oriented from a young age and was always looking for opportunities to turn a small profit while giving something person I was proud of, like the little slushie stand, I was like 8, I made my own slushie syrups from sugar and koolaid mixes and made it extra gooey everyone loved it.
The jobs I liked a lot were phased out by bad economy or automation. I’ve never had a full time job I could handle. I planned to be a professional with a masters or PhD but my health had other plans.
>are you earning unemployment benefits? If you're disabled, are you earning disability benefits instead? Is it enough or do you need a bf/husband or parents to financially help?
I was supposed to get disability but it fell through. I got a judge who has literally never approved anyone who wasn’t actively on death’s door/severely violently mentally retarded. My lawyer was basically like, this guy never gives anyone disability. And he had horrible reviews online. Basically if you can speak he won’t grant disability. I got bad luck. I’ll need to reapply. Sucks but, it’s all I can do. For now my parents support me but they are impoverished so it’s a struggle. Thankfully they have housing security at least and my dad can make good money when he tries, it’s just hard cause he’s auDHD af and has an autoimmune condition and is a shitty scrote so he struggles to do his work. Also THANK GOD for being an only child.
>do you plan to stay a neet for as long as possible or do you maybe plan on staying one for a specific amount of time?
Unless a treatment comes out for my most debilitating condition, I plan to stay NEET. Even then idk if I could get over my other issues.
>do you still keep yourself busy during your free time or are you bored most of the time?
I’m only bored when I’m bedbound and can’t play video games and when it’s too taxing to even watch stuff on a laptop. That’s very boring. I’m not bored when I’m well enough to sit my ass up and watch stuff or better yet play video games. Thankfully I’ve always been at least able to go to the bathroom and brush my teeth but being stuck in bed due to feeling like absolute garbage is SO BORING especially when videos fuck with you or worse, you have a migraine on top of being so disgustingly unexplainably fatigued.
>inb4 ur fat
I’m not fat and even though I’ve been very unwell I’ve been prioritizing a daily walk and a few sit ups/push ups. I’m hovering slightly above underweight. Eat my ass.
No. 2492855
>>2492803>you just won't have any time to yourself due to the exhaustion once that happensI'm just not sure how people get motivated with that reality.
I did okay with freelance art for a few years after my first breakdown over being a NEET. I started strong, slowed down, then stopped recently since I started stressing over everything. It did help a tiny bit with independence, and I liked feeling useful by being able to lend family money.
But my parents told me that even if I made some progress during that time, it wasn't much progress.
>>2492816Mid 20s. Parents are aged, but healthy currently, I have a decent support net with functional sibling as well, but the thought of them having to support someone dysfunctional like me while they're having their own family, I don't want that.
No. 2492870
>>2458708Not a neet technically but I work at my mom's firm so I guess in actuality I would be.
Yes that's very familiar. Not really controlling, but rather pampering? I think the job she gave me is a perfect example of it. It's just 4 hours, extremely easy and comfy, but pays juuust enough for the bill and food. Can't move anywhere from there. My basics are covered but there is no forward path. I will never earn more that the basics there, but at the same time my hourly pay is good enough that I can find shitty jobs with less hourly no longer interesting even if the total hours would result in better pay overall. There is just 0 incentive. It's too comfy in this puddle. Shameful and depressive but so goddamn easy.
No. 2492873
>>2459669Arguing on the internet is kinda just coping mechsnism for me (as an autists myself). If I don't argue with other people I end up arguing with myself in my head annd basically going schizo.
I am a zoomer.
I just subconsciously understand or think that unless I tickle another person emotionally they won't give me the time of day. There gotta be something provocative involved. I am the lowest of trolls.
No. 2492921
My mom seems to be grasping that this country is done for. She used to be much more anal about mine or brothers job failures, now she just says whatever. She has also poked me saying that I should move elsewhere (referring to different country). I told her I dont have resources and she said she would pay but like damn. She doesnt seem to understand how much worse other places are in terms of rent, her expenses on me would rise from like 300 a month to 1500 and its too much shame for me to handle. She also doesn't get that I am a total dependant - not just financially but emotionally and psychosocially. Its fucking terrifying to be without her. I even have a nigel, but he is just indulgence thing for me while my only real friend in this life is my mom. I know she will never move, she is fine getting bombed if it comes to this because she doesnt care anymore. But I am actually terrified being here. It is not just looming threat of war, but all of the social services are being uprooted. The unemployment offices are closing, neetbux are getting cancelled, higher education is no longer free, the health insurance is slowly erasing important fields out of it - last year it was psychiatry, this year its orthopaedics, every year there are more people that just do not get to have a gp meaning they cant even have a sick leave. All of this is combined with persistent inflation and rising taxes, while it doesnt affect me personally that much it just adds to the anxiety. I feel like the gov is just planning on amassing as much money as possible and then running away themselves.
No. 2493868
>>2493802Same. Do you socialize much with others in real life or mainly online?
I'm just not sure how much damage I've done to my psyche by not having proper social interaction for so long. When they were talking about the long-term mental effects of covid lockdowns, it made me feel like I must be beyond broken.
It was kind of a blur the first 5 years, but then I became more aware of my situation after that.
No. 2493936
>>2493868I'm long past the hikki threshold of having to remind myself to open my windows once every other month not to end up suffocating and blacking out
not even sure when was the last time I talked to someone IRL, probably my parents many years ago, since I've been living alone since I dropped out of school at 16 basically
but it's not like I have online friends either, sometimes I may vent here when I feel more sad than usual, but I'm never really expecting, nor getting, any replies anyway
I doubt I'd be able to hold a conversation without stuttering or feeling utterly terrified, so that probably would count as "long-term damage" for you
also my health went to the gutter, but that's a given at this point
No. 2494943
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>>2444802I wasn't originally a NEET, I wasn't even a socially anxious type but I started getting stalked online and in real life and now I shun society as a whole. I graduated hs got my bachelors degree. Now I just fantasize about killing men and society is dirty vile trash to me. I've had experience working in hotels and will turn my mom's house into a bed and breakfast business to help fund her care and my life. But I will never rejoin society. I Am through. I will cook for people and garden and can things and sell bee honey, split the dinero. That is as far as I will go anymore. The rest of the time I will make art that enrages people behind the scenes and enjoy it. You can all kiss my ass.
No. 2495057
>>2495052I've already had the privilege to experience mind-numbing sedatives to treat "psychosis" and the so-called "zombieland" when I was a teenager
so not sure how some glorified drug prescriptionist is going to fix anything for me
No. 2495062
>>2495057You seem to have severe depression, not psychosis.
If you're talking to a good psychiatrist, he will argue better than me the pros and cons of going on medication, and even if you don't want to go on drugs, they are not even supposed to be the main treatment. The main treatment is therapy, which will be prescriped by him as well.
Drugs are supposed to help you get back up. The drugs used for depression (SSRI) are not the same as those used to treat "psychosis", they are more mild and have less side effects, they are much less numbing. They are supposed to be taken for 6 months to 2 years until you can function correctly on your own, so it's not a life sentence either.
It's at least worth a try going in for a consult, hearing out what he thinks your diagnosis is and what treatment options he has to offer, you can ask all the questions you want and judge him based on his answers. If you're not convinced you can always walk away.
No. 2540008
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Any tips for making friends as a NEET? I don't really have many opportunities to meet people and when I do, half the time it seems like they get uneasy when they find out that I'm a NEET who isn't currently planning to go back to school or get a job. The reason is due to physical health and autism (people can tell that I'm autistic but not that I have health issues) but people only seem to get more uncomfortable if I reveal that I'm kinda disabled, they can't seem to understand that it doesn't bother me so it always tanks the vibe as if I said I had a terminal disease or something. Plus normies talk about their classes and/or jobs and their existing friends so much that it feels like I'm just locked out of conversation most of the time. I know you should try to ask people about themselves but it gets really boring and one-sided, and people tend to gravitate away from me towards others who actually share their experiences.
My life isn't bad, I have supportive family and I don't have true mental disorders besides autism but I just get so bored and wish I had more of a chance to participate in the world and make people happy. I don't have bad self-esteem but sometimes it seems like others view me as less than and assume that I must feel the same. E.g., people insist on dwelling on my NEETdom even though I'm trying to talk about anything else and "reassure" me that they're sure I can find a job soon, even though I don't want to and don't aspire to have one, and when I explain that, they get this stunned look and stammer as if they're upset and confused that I didn't feel helped by them. I know that being alone all day isn't what I really want and is leaving me unfulfilled, but in practice talking to people sucks most of the time because they fundamentally can't relate to me and things get awkward. How to get out of this dilemma?
No. 2543335
>>2540008Your health is your business. It's not anybody else's, so you really don't need to be telling people that you're disabled if it isn't already obvious. Maybe you didn't know because your autistic, but going up to people and talking about your disability makes people uncomfortable. It's not so much that they don't understand that it doesn't bother you, it's that they don't understand why you think it's an acceptable thing to bring up in conversation. If other people can tell that you're autistic, you should probably buy some self-help books for autists, or attending therapy to learn how to mitigate the symptoms of your autism.
>normies talk about their classes and/or jobs and their existing friends so much that it feels like I'm just locked out of conversation most of the time.You're locking yourself out of the conversation by refusing to get a job or go to school. Normies talk about their classes or jobs because those topics are used as a starting point for conversations because almost everyone either has a job or goes to school, so it's easy for people to relate and contribute to the conversation.
>people tend to gravitate away from me towards others who actually share their experiences.Working and studying aren't the only 'experiences' that exist. Have you ever thought about volunteering or doing charitable work? Lots of animal shelters need people to play with the animals, lots of old age homes need people to talk to the elderly, lots of soup kitchens need people to help cook.
>How to get out of this dilemma?If you're really going to avoid getting a job and avoid studying, then you have to get a life. That includes volunteering, going to social clubs, going out and about often, traveling, engaging in your hobbies and interests, attending conventions, going to hobby clubs. The more active and full your life is, the less that work and school matter. You probably seem uninteresting in conversation because you are uninteresting (no offense). You have to actually create a life for yourself that you can tell others about.
No. 2543616
>>2543335I try not to bring up my health issues unprompted but usually people ask why I couldn't keep working or why I do certain things (like sometimes I limp or fall) and idk how else to answer those questions without at least saying I have a health condition. I used to go outside regularly even if I sometimes felt mentally overstimulated but since I developed chronic disease it has become much more difficult and I can't always walk well. I am getting medical care its just slow
I want to do things like volunteer or even work if possible, but idk what opportunities are possible. I don't have credentials so I only qualify for labor-intensive jobs that I'm not strong enough to do. I worked fast food for a little while before my health got worse and I physically could not do a lot of the tasks that were supposed to be required of everyone and constantly needed help, and people kept commenting about me acting autistic. I think I'd enjoy volunteering at an animal shelter though, that's a good idea. Currently there isn't one nearby but I will seek that out once I move later this year.
>That includes volunteering, going to social clubs, going out and about often, traveling, engaging in your hobbies and interests, attending conventions, going to hobby clubs.I'm gonna be honest, a lot of the difficulty for me is that I'm at a level where I don't understand "how" to do these things and feel like I need a step by step for stuff. It's like being told to build a sandwich when you don't know what type of sandwich or where to obtain ingredients. I started seeing a psych for autism and I hope it'll go well but I need to wait for them to get back to me.
No. 2543742
>>2543642I think maybe you misread my post because never once did I tell her to get a job or to go back to school.
>>2543616>I'm at a level where I don't understand "how" to do these things and feel like I need a step by step for stuff.Have you ever seen how baby birds learn to fly? Their mother usually drops them out of the nest and watched them fall, and lo, the baby birds manage to fly. You're never going to get a perfect step-by-step guide on how to accomplish some things, you just have to do them and try your best. You will learn as you go. It can be overwhelming, and nerve-wracking, but it's much more beneficial for you to step out of your comfort-zone and develop your character in new ways like this instead of waiting in the sidelines for the perfect moment (which will arrive) to arrive. Working with a psychologist is a good first step, and I think that your problems will be further alleviated by exerting yourself in social situations like through volunteer work.
No. 2543903
>>2543820No? I never said that she should get a job or go back to school. You drew your own conclusions. Don't pin your thought process on me.
Volunteer work is not the same as having a job. You aren't required to volunteer, nor are there any time constraints, nor any expectations. If I volunteer at a soup kitchen and I don't like how it goes, I can leave whenever I want to, and I can never come back, with no consequences. Petting kittens at an animal shelter for 30 minutes once a week is not the same thing as having a job. Be for real.
>>2543876I think that sometimes we don't want to admit that we're afraid to leave our comfort-zone, maybe because we know deep down that once we admit it, we're gonna have to leave it. Your life will always stay the same if you stay in your comfort-zone, and that's fine, but if you want to change your life or improve your life, you're gonna have to be brave and try new things and be uncomfortable for a while. I used to hate swimming, I'd always try to make excuses to avoid going to classes, I'd always flop around in the water nearly drowning, but I still did it. Now, swimming is one of my favourite activities. If I didn't challenge myself to be uncomfortable, I would never have learned that I loved swimming, and I would be missing out on that part of myself. We're human beings, we live and we learn and in a way we should be living to learn while learning to live.
No. 2544284
>>2543742For me it's difficult because I don't have social anxiety and in the past few years I've made an effort to try to engage with people whenever I have opportunities, but I can tell that people don't connect with me and it sucks to exert a ton of effort to socialize (it takes a lot of mental energy to process what people say and formulate responses) only for the result to be unsatisfying. The idea of just throwing myself at something over and over until one day it magically works is hard for me to follow and my instinct is that there must be a logical strategy I can adopt to better my chances of success.
I guess what I mean to say is, I am not finding success by "just trying my best" with the opportunities I get, and I'm trying to figure out how I can adapt my approach. I feel like people who are able to "just put themselves out there" and find success without further instruction must not have as many social issues as me since I do do that and I don't seem to get the promised results.
No. 2545559
my only source of relief has come down to sleeping, sometimes 14 or 16 hours a day if possible, I barely even eat anymore, I wish I finally had the will to put an end to this, but I already know I'll keep on living like a coward, my only social interactions have been whining anonymously online for the better part of this year, thankfully even that rate have been declining has well, it's unbearably cringe, I should just suck up and die already, but no, I have to rawdog this without even being able to drug my brains out anymore, and make it everyone else's problem
No. 2545946
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Hi nonnies. How are your dating lives, or lack thereof? I always hear and read online that it's easier for NEET women to date and that men don't care if a woman works. But, in my experience, that's not true. I've received insinuations of laziness from many men around my age. Women too. They can't fathom a life without working. On the other hand, I've seen many unemployed men with working girlfriends who pay for their stuff and put up with them. I swear it's a fucking psyop. If we don't work, then we must be gold diggers. I think. I'm a western eurofag, if that helps. I seriously don't understand this mentality that everything is fine for women who don't work. The women around me are the ones who hold everything down. This only adds to my feelings of inadequacy, of course.
No. 2546334
>>2545946So I temporarily was not NEET when I started dating but I was working at a snail's pace towards a dead end college degree that was very obviously a dead end to anyone who knew anything about it
(basically I spent years taking random easy classes that weren't actually on track to earning a degree, and the uni didn't kick me out because I unintentionally exploited a loophole). My then bf was actually relieved that I said that I wanted to drop out because I knew it was pointless, since he was worried about how he could gently try to convince me to work at something that isn't completely retarded and useless.
He has told me that in his life he knew a lot of women who were extremely ride or die about having a prestigious career and/or having a big salary, and that it was a big fear of his that he would date someone only to be faced with some tough situations if they had disagreements about money or work-life balance. He did not care about how much money a woman made or whether or not she wanted to pursue a career, but he cared a lot about whether a woman would neglect relationships with family/friends/future children in favor of careermaxxing, and he cared whether a woman would be obsessed with having the "posting Instagram pics of biannual trips to Milan and Paris while in designer jewelry" type of luxurious lifestyle that requires long hours at work to maintain. I'm not trying to diss anyone by saying this since I love his family but tbh since getting to know the overall genre of both men and women he grew up around, I get why it was a concern for him. He is glad that I am too autistic to ever behave in this status-seeking way or to socially police him for being spergy himself, and that we are in agreement about living a simple lifestyle where we don't care what others think. For instance we are getting married this year and it's going to be very small and frugal—he told me he has an acquaintance who's set on having an expensive wedding with hundreds of people and we both think that's a nightmare.
However, he also knew that I had spent time as a NEET in the past and had said that he isn't ok with it if I'm literally bumming around doing nothing, but that he didn't care about how much money I made (or even if I made any) as long as I was doing
something. I got a wagie job for a while (which he loved since we both got free food from it) but stopped because I had a health scare come up, and he is ok with me being a NEET who is basically bumming around doing nothing for now because he wants me to focus on recovery until I am healthy again.
Based on a few men who've shared their relevant thoughts on this topic with me, it seems like many feel similarly where they are very scared about dating a woman who is obsessed with her career and have possibly exaggerated fears about how many women are actually LinkedIn hustlers, which is probably where the "ugh men don't care about your work life!!" messaging comes from, but they are also wary of NEET women because they are worried that she is or will become irresponsible or immature. After all, a lot of NEETs
are neurotic and unhealthy. It is less specifically about the job and more about whether you can show that you are levelheaded, kindhearted, and able to meaningfully work hard towards something that's important to you. Disclaimer that these guys are generally secure about their income level and that this likely doesn't apply to men who are low-income or men who just place a high value on wealth/prestige, which is admittedly lot of men… I've gotten a lot of negativity from both sexes for not working or for not doing work that they think is good enough, regardless of my reasons, and including in a past relationship where the guy insulted me a lot over it (despite being NEET himself…), so I get how you feel. There are people in the world who just think everyone's value is derived from grinding even if they're disabled or something and you just have to ignore them and look for people who are able to see the bigger picture. That doesn't mean we shouldn't reflect and work on ourselves in our own ways, especially if your reason for being NEET is tied into some personal flaws, just that you don't need a fancy job title in order to be valuable in people's lives.
No. 2546448
>>2546334appreciate this post.
i have lupus and struggle with employment because 40 hours a week is too much and even with part time hours i end up killing myself for wages that i can’t even survive on. i want to support myself but it feels impossible. the only time i’ve been able to date has been when i’m unemployed and i’m ashamed to tell men that i’m not working despite doing my best to fill my days with meaningful things (learning new skills, working on projects, reading, etc) when my health allows. they act like i do nothing all day and like i’m on permanent vacation.
No. 2546458
>>2546448ayrt I possibly have an unspecified autoimmune disease (doctor said I have ANAs but testing is inconclusive) and I am also too weak to do most work. Even walking and standing can be difficult for me at times and it does suck when people get socially uncomfortable about me either because they think a young healthy(-looking) person should be active and independent, or because they get sensitive and downcast about the concept of disabilities. I kinda get it but it's also silly to me that some people get outright squeamish if I'm simply moving slowly lol I guess it's uncanny to them because I'm not geriatric and it reminds them that good health isn't a given.
It is great that you're intentional about pursuing meaningful activities. I don't think your situation sounds shameful at all, there is nothing immoral or less human about being disabled but there are plenty of people misusing their abilities to do shameful and inhumane things. And while it is a sad reality that many people are ignorant or cruel about disabilities, it also weeds out people who would be a waste of time. It'd be better to be single than to be with someone who'd turn unreliable as soon as you need extra help, a truly good partner is someone who is loving and willing to learn about your needs regardless of how healthy or sick you are.
No. 2547219
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Long spergy vent I'm sorry I have no one. I feel like I have finally hit rock bottom. After all these years of being an on-and-off NEET, even at my lowest points, I always managed to distract myself and genuinely enjoy my little hobbies. Reading, watching anime or movies, gaming, even going on walks once in a while. Now, I don't know what to do except doomscroll. I tried to rotate between these things but I can't find joy in them again. I feel completely stuck, and maybe I'm severely depressed again.
But I'm not going back on medication. That shit made me fat, left me in a constant state of depersonalization, and I couldn't even cry. As for therapy, it was the same old shit, "make friends!", as if it is so fucking easy and would magically solve all my life problems. Not to mention how "self-aware" I supposedly seemed to be. Thanks for nothing. I didn't learn a damn thing there. Yeah, I knew I was right. God I hate living. I don't know what to do with myself and I don't know what to make of this life. How do I get out of this? Oh find a job right. Go back to studying. I tried, I always end up having a meltdown and going back home. I wish I was born rich. I'd pack a bag and travel the world. Not even in a "finding myself!1!!1" way. I just want to wander, go somewhere that isn't this fucking city, eat different food, see different people. At least I still have that in me? But it's probably just another way of running away from myself. I'm one of those materialistic NEETs. I want clothes. I want makeup. I want to decorate my room and buy all my hobbies in physical form. Honestly, I'm genuinely considering prostitution kek. I don't care about myself anymore. At least I'd be getting dicked down, male attention, and money. Yes I'm stupid male bad prostitution bad scum of the earth whatever can I vent. God, I love money. It's so good when you can just go out and buy a coffee, a pack of cigarettes, and not feel like a loser leech bitch. But I never ask my mother for money. There are things I like to buy when I have my own money. Foods my family doesn't like, silly little things just for me, contributing to bills once in a while. I know I'm lucky, but I'm also miserable. I just want freedom. I feel like a womanchild. I don't know how time flew by so fast. How I tried so many times to get out of this loop, but here I am. Sorry, but also thank you if you read all this.
No. 2547228
>>2547219>But I'm not going back on medication. That shit made me fatGo on bupropion. It's the only anti-depressant that works for me, & I've tried over 8 different types. Bupropion isn't an SSRI, it's more analogous to an amphetamine-type of medicine. If your symptoms of depression include listlessness, fatigue, anhedonia, then bupropion is the perfect drug. It leaves you feeling energized, content, and ready to explore your interests. It helps you lose weight as well, at higher dosages it's actually prescribed as a weight-loss aid, and it doesn't impact your sex drive either. Overall, bupropion is a great choice. It's much better than prostituting yourself for makeup.
No. 2547535
>>2547468i feel like weed is a less harmful alternative, i guess? or even a shopping addiction for the dopamine. idk it sounds very pollyanna after school special but take it from someone who’s been on opioids and benzos, tolerance builds up fast and if it’s not prescribed it’s a money sink and dicey. the logistics of how to get it to stave off withdrawals are constantly hanging over you regardless. and if you do decide you want to live after all it’s a lot to come back from.
fwiw i hate psych meds too but imo half the battle is finding a good psych. if they can’t respect that you won’t tolerate weight gain, move on, etc. a good psych knows that meds only work if you will take them.
No. 2547589
>>2547535thing is I've been prescribed heavy analgesics for years due to some chronic illness that's never going to be cured, but it almost never flare-up so only ended up using it maybe once or twice and it's been on my mind ever since, so it's been accumulating and got myself an essentially unlimited supply, while currently sitting on like several grams of morphine equivalent, which is why I've been considering finally putting it to use lately
nothing else does it for me anymore, sleeping brings no relief, I barely even eat anymore, I don't even do anything the few hours of the day I manage to stay awake, I don't enjoy anything anymore, I already live like an addict except I'm out there rawdogging my anguish every single waking moment when I could easily just be forcing myself to sleep all the time and eventually forever
but no I've long settled on the fact there's no recovering in my life anymore, it's been like a decade since anything happened I barely even know what year we're in at this point, I don't even have anyone left to check on me so it's whatever, if I could end it all today I would but I can't so all I have left is finding some way to cope and besides that I feel like I've exhausted them all already
but I've never done drugs in my life ever, so that's all I have, the few times I tried were because of physical pain that they were prescribed for, so I have zero tolerance, barely 5 mg equivalent were enough to make my head spin and send me to sleep for 24 hours straight, so it could just be that easy for me
No. 2548240
>>2547589I don't want to talk you off a bridge cause it's not like I know how hard your life is to live. But you sound like you are stuck in a loop of every day being the same and having nothing to look forward to. I know that's the neet life in general but have you thought of maybe getting some plants, so you at least have a responsibility to water them and a reason to get up and go check on them? I want to suggest a cat but you seem like you would need to start a lot smaller. Either way, little things like that can help you feel more like you have a purpose, and having a purpose of a good way to slowly pull yourself out of that pit.
Again I know it's not my business and I've been in a similar place where it was just nothing day by day and nothing changed but I had to remember that if I'm feeling so stagnant that I want to die that maybe I can do anything like literally any thing at all and it would be enough to give my brain a crumb of dopamine. Even if it's crawling out of bed to lay in the grass in front of my apartment complex for a few hours just to feel something and get the sun on my skin.
No. 2551253
>>2551215there's actually tons of birds singing nearly all day long in the trees in front of my apartment
whenever I feel too desperate I usually open my window and listen for a while… it's especially refreshing very early in the morning before everyone actually woke up like just before 6 am
No. 2552405
>>2551203Because "living" in fantasy isn't living at all. It's against living. The only good reason to believe in or pursue something is because it's true.
It will never truly fulfill you to fill up on lies, and the unchecked idea that we can just choose our own reality leads to a lot of unhappiness. Look at obvious examples like troons or pornsick men, who destroy not just themselves but also cause immense harm to others through their willful delusion. Much of the pain in the world is rooted in rejecting truths—about people's dignity, about what's real, about what love is—in favor of just selfish pleasure, which ironically leads to misery for all.
Many people will argue that this or that fantasy isn't hurting anyone, and it may be that it's not causing widespread active harm like the aforementioned types, but it's still based on the same faulty attitude. Drinking a tablespoon of poison isn't benign just because it isn't a gallon. And even if the responsibility makes you uncomfortable, you're still worth more than hurting yourself.
It's wonderful to be inspired by or to find comfort in fantasies, but we still have to acknowledge and work towards a better reality because reality is all we really have. We do all of us a great disservice when we forget that we have the ability to improve it, even if it's only in small ways. When you never learn to accept the challenges of life or to take action against them, you never learn to stop being miserable. Like the addict, the escapist can't ever really be free of their problems until they recognize that they have a problem.
I know "it gets better" is a super overused stock platitude, but it happened to me, and learning how REAL joy and kindness can exist in the world just didn't compare and is an especially beautiful experience when you're coming from a past of deep despair. There's always time for things to turn around little by little.
No. 2552438
>>2552405>REAL joy and kindness can exist in the world just didn't compareI know this is true, because I've had a taste of it before, I just choose to forget about it and drown my memories in cheap consolations
it doesn't compare because it's nothing like it to begin with, much less raw and much more fulfilling, leaving you with a satiated feeling rather than building a dependence to maintain the delusion
but that's all besides the point because it doesn't really depend on what you want, but what you can afford, and some of us just aren't deserving of anything but shallow escapism
I could be high all day and still cry myself to sleep every night, when a productive member of society might struggle all day but without ever succumbing to the same degree of dread
true happiness comes from the relief of pain, but when your whole existence centers around the mitigation of your pain, it simply ceases to exit, it's like they say, when every day is a party no day really is, it's always the same endless mind numbing blur that only serves as a buildup to the occasional breakdowns
there's no struggle in my life anymore, I've completely given up, there's no stake, nothing to look forward to, no progress, no definitive relief, it's boiled down to glorified physiological upkeep and meaningless stroking
No. 2552554
Anons, how do you deal with the feeling of being completely useless and life not having a point? I'm a neet and sure, the free time to watch shit and laze around is fine, but I feel like I don't have a purpose. Like, at all. I live in a small dead end town. I go out in the morning and almost no one is around. I watch the seasons pass, I watch other people on socials have fun, go on vacations, graduate, having memories with friends. I have no friends. I feel like I'm just waiting for things to get even worse. Sometimes I think that maybe a job or studying gives people a sense of purpose or accomplishments, but I've been there and it really doesn't. Like what if I study and I graduate? Do I even care about what I'm doing? I've had jobs before and I just feel more tired and more miserable.
>>2551215 is right, things like birdwatching and being in nature do calm you down, but then I go back inside my house and I'm right where I was before. I used to really enjoy drawing and reading comics but now it all feels pointless. I don't even talk about any of that shit with anyone, there's no one to talk to.