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No. 247377
Please keep posts focused on women and female homosexuality! If you want to talk about attraction toward males it probably belongs in the bisexuality thread or questioning thread (check the catalog, they're usually not on the front page but I promise they exist!). Please ignore obvious bihet/troon/tradthot/etc rage bait as well. Running low on vintage pics so I hope retro is fine!
Topics of discussion may include but are not limited to:
>first crush?>what’s your local lesbian scene like?>cute stories about your gf>favourite lesbian media? lesbian media you hate?>coming out stories>are there any cows you’d uhaul with?>bitch about being lonely>tips for coping with being lonely>butch? femme? how do you feel about labels?>top? bottom? how do you feel about those labels?>what's your type?>when did you know you were gay?>which lesbian stereotypes do you fit? which ones don’t fit you at all?>what were you like as a kid? tomboy? girly girl who made her Barbies kiss?>what do you wanna be like as an old lady lesbian? >get mushy and describe your dream relationship/date/etc>best date/match? worst?>how homophobic are your family/friends? is it woke homophobia or oldschool homophobia?>dating app horror stories>f/f fanfic recs (pls)>everything we hate about every other online lesbian communityprevious threads:
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>>>/g/200981 No. 247470
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>>247457Twitter would consider her full butch for wearing pants and no drag makeup. I've seen picrel described as 'butch vibes'
No. 247574
>>247569I don't think that online lesbian spaces were much more better in the past, maybe less overrun by trains but imo there never was a high quality stuff. Basically don't beat yourself up too hard for not being involved earlier.
>>247573if these women are going to embarrass themselves by simping for a man, they could have at least choose someone who is not offensive to look at.
No. 247576
>>247569She has a nice voice but I'm not sure if it's just the studio quality reverb or her voice anymore. It's clear 90% of TikTokers only like her bcuz stanning
POC because they're
POC = good uwu and as an Asian this genuinely gives me the creeps.
>>247573Why do these people claim that Hozier's music is perfect for lesbians like…he's a man kek.
No. 247588
>>247470I'm so bitter about the "women in suits" trend because I've always worn a suit to all occasions since I was 15 and been considered a freak for it, now you got all these kinsey 1 women having girlcrushes on top supermodels wearing pantsuits and calling it being a lesbian.
>>247524Soon I hope nonna
>>247579Don't think so, we just moved to "two femmes or two they/thems" instead and killed butches off completely.
No. 247704
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>>247685The pillow princess discourse drives me nuts. Like obviously women are entitled to their boundaries and nobody should be forced but literally everyone except stone tops wants a partner that reciprocates and that’s not predatory or entitled. Even the mildest criticism of it gets you branded a predatory lesbian who wants to literally assault them. If a het male refuses to reciprocate because pussy is icky we’re allowed to call it dumb and make jokes about it.
No. 247733
>>247704My ex was like that, and it genuinely traumatized me. I made her cum like seven times, and when I asked if I could get something too, she just looked fucking disgusted. I started crying, she called me overdramatic and a rapist. This is just one example but it happened so many times. Ironically she was the ""butch"" in the relationship, you would think it was the other way around.
I know it's stupid but it kind of made me give up on women ever finding me attractive.
No. 247736
>>247704Fat men being lazy in bed too, shocking? No. Not really.
>>247733It's not about you being attractive or not, your gf was just selfish and even mentally ill. Calling you a rapist whenever you disagree or want some attention is such a low blow and quite retarded since women can't really be rapists, no I don't care whatever anyone thinks it's just almost impossible. I hope you find someone that values you and cares about your pleasure
No. 247742
>>247740Also are you a man or a newfag who discovered this site from reddit? Your writing style in both
>>247737 and
>>247740 really stick out and it's easy to tell you from other anons because you don't interrogate. I thought you were the original anon at first and tried the assure you you it isn't rape to ask your gf for something you want to try in bed but your talking points make you sound like a pickme or a mra crying women rape too who has no place posting in a lesbian thread.
No. 247752
>>247736Yeah I know logically it's not me not being attractive (I know my ex was not some "sex bomb" on societys standards but I found her hot anyway).
I just feel like it's impossible to find a woman who likes my body as much as I like hers. I don't know if it's fetisization but I am constantly telling a gf how pretty and lovely and beautiful aaah she is because I genuinely think so, and always handsy with her body because I like female body so much…. Basically with women I'm like a teenage hormonal moid, idk what the hell is wrong with me. I have just never met a woman who likes me the way I do her, I feel like a freak. I even tried drinking spearmint tea to tone my libido down last time since it's so annoying.
Spoiler moid mention;
And I did basically give up, and I know it's haram (please do not strangle me) I did find someone who is excited by my body the way I am about women, a fucking moid. But now I do not feel anything like I did with women, I do not feel anything at all. That's why I am puzzled if my attraction to women is just a learned thing from scrotes, some fetishy stuff from porn. I do not know if it's normal to be so obsessed with women. No. 247756
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>>247754>men have higher standardskek nonna
And obviously not looking for advise with muh naigell! Just do lesbians feel they are the embodiment of picrel too
Maybe I'm a man on the inside, time to go on T uguu
No. 247762
>>247752In my experience a lot of lesbians have had a lesbian relationship that traumatized them, more often than not it's being a servant to an unstable pillow princess who mentally abuses them and makes them feel like rapist for having normal sexual needs and desires. I seriously don't know why this is but so many that I've met have issues with their sexuality or fucked off to a miserable dead bedroom relationship with a moid simply because they feel too predatory for finding women attractive.
Whichever the case, it's not your fault and wanting sex with your partner you find attractive is completely acceptable. I
wish I had a partner with a high libido, it feels like finding lesbians or febfems who aren't shamed into borderline asexuality is impossible.
No. 247819
>>247815Not trying to start any fights but I posted it specifically here to get opinions from the pussy fandom. Ok now that I wrote it out I do sound like a troon trying to force my way into a women's locker room.
I just saw "pillow princess" in the first page of /ot/ and got
TrIgGeRed and just HAD to post my sob story, I'm sorry, I should not have.
No. 247842
>>247840That's textbook racebaiting
nonnie.
No. 247848
>>247844First of all I'm pretty sure nobody forced her to put on that shirt and that's simply her identifying as a femme, maybe she dresses in OTT frilly dresses outside of this photo to pass as femme by zoomer lesbian standards, we don't know. Secondly, does she even have lighter skin? Looks the same to me as the girls in the front, only she's wearing a white shirt and standing in the sun while the others are wearing black and have more shadows on their faces. It's a black and white photo so it's impossible to tell.
>>247846It's such a retarded thing to get so worked up over anyway because like you said we know nothing about the context of this photo and I think it's in extremely poor taste to bring racebait brainrot in the lesbian thread of all places. There's a reason why it's a banned topic on Lolcow, it always ends up in infighting and uncontrolled spergery. Like someone thinking you can't be a femme if you're wearing a sleeveless shirt and jeans in one photo unless racism.
No. 247857
>>247762I don't know any other lesbians but this has been my experience to a T with my exes. Bi but prefers men, none of them interested in reciprocating, all of them
abusive and making me feel like a predatory freak for wanting them sexually, and the relationships ending and I feel like I'm gross and unloveable as I watch them go on to date men. I have never been with a woman who desired me as I desired her. I hope one day I'll find another butch who can love me the same way I would love her. Where do we even find each other nowadays? It's all bisexuals and trannies.
No. 247860
>>247840if you look closer, the femme is obviously wearing makeup and her hair is considerably more stylized compared to the self proclaimed butch women in the pic
To be fair,I get the confusion - the butch on the right doesn't show any particular masculine qualities at all - maybe she was a baby butch just starting out?
No. 247989
>>247907
>motorboat her boobasBest thing I've heard today, same nonna
>>247962Yep and basically any woman who talks about woman empowerment or advocates even the slightest towards having women in a strong position within society is now a "lesbian/wuhluhwuh icon uwu"
No. 248391
>>248166Aw it's okay nonna. May you get that perfect chance one day.
>>248041Same with "non-binary lesbians". I don't get it. I thought the definition of lesbian was a "homosexual woman".
No. 248770
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I really need to go into dating since I'm in early college. All the lesbian girls are either ocd-autistic which I hate or giga normies. I get along well with east asian student since I like to teach them my language, but you can never know things about their love life. I was thinking about finding a girlfriend trought hobbies/fandoms but I know I will only find genderspecial or ultra autistic ones like in the past. Please nonnas help
No. 248779
>>248770RIP sorry but that's basically all there is nowadays. Why don't you just go for normies? They're easier to deal with.
Also as a fellow autismo I'd like to know where you find non tranny autismo lesbians bc I've never met one who didn't eventually turn into a he/they.
No. 248794
>>248779thank u anon for that hard fact. I never go for the normies since most of them are boring or non passionate about any subject or worst lazy rich meanies (fashion school in a nutshell).
Yeah I was surprised too by the autistic cis lesbian but they are quite normie-ish and into feminist politics and common lgbt stuff.
honestly I would like either a funny normie girl or a girl who as clear interest and are not OCD about everything ( I'm a fellow autist too but like I learn not to flip my shit it someone take a little too much space when we are working on bulky stuff ).
Funny thing, this evening I crossed a probably korean girl from my school near it and she kept making eye contact while her friend where talking. Idk if it was because I was carrying a fabric roll but it was so strange.
No. 248798
>>248794To piggyback I feel like I've been meme'd into only noticing girls into alt styles or have colorful short haircuts bc my mind instantly thinks 'Oh she
could be "qweer"' even if that just means they are bihet with bfs. Also I think a lot of time these girls are too young for me (like still in highshool). I don't take notice to most normie looking girls because I always assume she's probably straight. Honestly a shame I feel like I'm missing out on some hidden gems.
No. 248960
>>247906She 100% sounded like an incel though
>straightgo away
>>248922She literally admitted she sounded like an incel but sure
No. 249045
>>248770i'm about to graduate and in the same boat as you lol i'm so sorry. i'm too weird to get along with normies but too normie to get along with the genderspecials
>>248798honestly i think i'm finally going to suck it up and adopt an alt look for this exact reason. most of my interests match anyway so it wouldn't really be larping. i think i'm coming across as like a horse girl or something right now
>>249027i've hated it since its inception. kinda seems like it's going out of style though
No. 249055
>>248960Go back to Twitter or Reddit.
>>249027Not just you. Even when it wasn't a TikTok, Tumblr or Twitter thing it always irked me the wrong way. What's so wrong about saying lesbian or attraction to women that they had to come up with this?
>>249045>too weird to get along with normies but too normie to get along with the genderspecialsAh, same here nonna, sorry about that. One day, hopefully.
No. 249114
Can us nonnas just date each other tbh?
>>249088Holey shit that is the best description of the term ngl. So that's why I never liked being called a wlw…
No. 249347
>>249205I believe I experienced "comphet" when I was a teen, as I would convince myself I was into men, but I would suddenly get uncomfortable and turned off once I had a real guy being interested in me in person. Slowly realized I had actually been a lesbian all along, and that's why I could never bring myself to date, kiss or get intimate with a man, even though in my head I would think about having a husband one day (this all prior to realizing I was a lesbian). I believe
that was comphet.
But if someone has no issues being intimate with a man and they cry comphet, she's just a fraud.
No. 249554
>>249543It's fucking hard, I feel for you nona. How to meet normal lesbians has been addressed many times in the past threads so do check out the older posts on the topic. TL;DR is be in a city, use HER/bumble etc but swipe left on anyone even remotely annoying while including dogwhistles on your bio, go to meetups and suck it up. You
have to sift through the annoying genderfucks and spicy hets if you want to meet real lesbians. It's just how it is and fixating on the challenging aspect will only have you sinking deeper into isolation.
It's easy as fuck to get bitter (I was bitter for a long time too) but you can't bring that energy into your new friendships as an opener. Sharing woes is great when you're a bit deeper into the friendship but don't establish them on doomertalk imo. Also, sometimes people seem like turbolibs with all sorts of qweer ideology but most of them only have a surface attitude in favor of it, due to ignorance/apoliticalness. You can easily talk to them about specific issues and find out most of them have no clue about the TRA behavior. For instance I'm in a mega-lib city and
none of the lesbians I met think you have to like girldick as a lesbian, just that you ought to treat transwomen as women in daily life which is not a big ask. We already do that IRL in order to avoid altercation lol. The ones I deepened my friendships all only date "afabs" and are often horrified at the sick shit "
terf" women go through. I've mostly been pleasantly surprised with the women I've met, though I was very picky with who I spent time meeting in person. Btw you can totally only swipe right on lesbians and express that you want to meet other lesbians in your bio, nobody will lynch you for that. Just don't tell people the reason you're excluding them (like when a bi/troon wants to be friends) and focus on the positive. You want to bond with other lesbians. Nobody is owed an explanation for that, trust me.
If you're serious about ending your isolation, you're gonna have to work pretty hard and keep motivated. I believe you can do it, though I know how hard it is first hand. Good luck out there.
No. 249590
>>249543I definitely feel the loneliness. I'm an unapologetic weeb and 10 years ago it was as easy as just walking to a convention group to find other lesbians or bisexuals to hang out with but now so many of them have trooned out or started dating men out of convenience, it's much easier to introduce a boyfriend to your parents. The rare "lesbians" (or at least those that identify as one) are underage yuri manga addicts or straight out transbians. I don't like hanging around normie style lesbians either because I'm an autistic nerd so dating apps or meetups just don't work for me as I genuinely can't connect with them. It would be nice to talk to someone about the woes of growing up a GNC lesbian and the baggage that it bears but the well-adjusted ones who have been dating the same girl since high school just don't understand where I'm coming from. The only people who seem to get it are those who identify as nonbinary transmasc genderspecials and they coped with it by picking up he/him pronouns instead.
Related but I'm more of a tomboy than a butch, due to this my coworkers don't clock me as a lesbian so they feel comfortable spilling out their homophobia and/or butchphobia in my presence. It's depressing to listen to jokes about ugly bulldykes and lesbians in general so instead of diving head first into conflict and making things awkward for everyone I just try to reason with them a bit and change the subject as fast as I can. Hearing peoples' unfiltered antigay statements like that makes me want to unironically rope.
No. 249960
>>249543God, yes, I feel this so hard. It's so difficult. Every single woman I meet that I click with is straight or bisexual and taken, and all lesbians I meet don't mesh well with me… and then the bisexuals who aren't taken are always genderspecials or anti-
terf. Sometimes I wonder if I really will be alone, and part of me wishes I could magically turn myself bi and date a man. It's so tough.
No. 250252
>>250090NTA but before I became more politically/feminist aware I used to be able to mesh with guys as friends, but not being into the moid aspect made feelings impossible, and I hated myself for that. I don't seek male friends anymore since my last male friends inevitably revealed themselves as coomers (which I guess is why if I woke up bi tomorrow I likely wouldn't date a man without extreme vetting, but past libfem me would) but I hate how it's easier to find a not completely hideous guy my age with similar dorky interests to drink with than a woman who is those things
>>249960At this point I'd love to meet a GC/Febfem bi woman but a lot of bi women within my interests or on apps are woke "pansexuals", she/theys, have a boyfriend and want a gf on the side…Even rural areas have queerios on the outskirts
No. 250973
>>249205>>249237when i realized i liked women i thought i had liked men because of comphet. in my experience it does seem to be easier to be one or the other instead of trying to explain you are bi with a preference for women. so in a way I get it for newly bisexual or questioning women. however, i know a lot of straight women who use it to explain why they suddenly overnight have an interest for women when they've exclusively slept with or dated men.
sage for blogpost
No. 251045
>>251041lol I follow a couple personal cows on radblr who have done this. It's funny because it's always the most loud, outspoken, aggressive 'lesbians' who do it. I get that sexuality is tough to figure out and I don't have anything against bi women who assume they're not into men because they haven't met an attractive one yet. But there's this very specific demographic of bi women who flock to radfem spaces and spend 50% of the year posting about how wonderful Nigel is and 50% of the year melting down about how they're really
valid lesbians for real and we're all goldstar incels for questioning it.
No. 251381
>>247495It's crazy how fast things have changed, i met my gf like three years ago on tinder, and back then you'd only see them every so often but now they're everywhere
I can't imagine what it would look like if I were to go in tinder rn, i think I would quickly give up ngl
No. 251472
>>247579I think people go with the dynamics they're most familiar and comfortable with, which explains the subculture.
I don't know if this is naive but I do think most relationships have a decision maker/doer and then someone who lets the other person do stuff.
>>251381Is a safer bet using fansites for girls love/manhwa/yuri? i just feel like at least you have something to talk about already if it's a hobby site, it's not upfront, it's less awkward, but you could meet girls like you there.
i know most shoujo ai/gl weeb spaces are full of men, but i think manhwa are at least more likely to be created and appreciated by women.
No. 252227
>>252081If you’re a lesbian looking for another lesbian, the chances are small. If you’re looking for another lesbian who likes the same stuff as you? Very difficult. I sometimes think you can have chemistry with someone you’re quite different to in interests. It’s sometimes necessary to adapt.
But yeah the internet is here so I’m sure there would be fansites to help you. What kind of nerdy stuff do you like?
No. 252250
>>252227I agree on focusing on chemistry and not too much on hobbies. Focusing on long term life goals (family, living arrangement, job), politics, and attraction would be far more beneficial for people in my view. Hobbies/interests can be shared in time and you may even discover something new that neither one of you expected to enjoy.
But maybe that's just my bias showing because I met my girlfriend thinking we didn't have enough in common on paper and turns out, we were extremely capable of the full spectrum of being into each other's lives. I was kinda guarded on hearing about one of her hobbies for a bit but it's just sweet hearing her talk my ear off about it now. I'm not gonna participate much myself but I love seeing her happy and it's good that she has something she can share with her friends which will help her be social. I don't want to be her sole provider, even though sometimes I want to be the only person in her world from how much I love her.
Ultimately it's helped us to be a bit different.
No. 252385
>>252344Ok i get what you’re saying. Yeah it sounds like you’re in a difficult place and I have absolutely no advice.
>>252250 had a cute anecdote though, like plenty of straight couples have different interests but one small thing they both like.
>>247569I think I’m a little too late to seethe but she really made angsty 15 year old me feel understood with all the rage in her music.
>>252334Amalia Holm
No. 252457
>>252227>>252250To be honest growing up as a geek doesn't necessarily mingle with the so called normies due to the life experience typical to both demographics. I'm a functional person but have chronic depression due to being bullied for my eccentricity and ostracized and isolated to the nerd community that accepted me has affected both my character and world view to the point it's often impossible to have a meaningful relationship with someone who led an average life with its generic ups and downs. I can be cordial and make small talk with my coworkers for example and have good chemistry with them, but I would imagine them becoming frustrated at how I perceive things or even embarrassed by me liking weebshit. It's usually a normie party being judgmental.
>>252355Ellen Page is a lesbian, isn't she? Her girlfriend dumped her just before she trooned out iirc.
No. 252557
>>252496kek she would be my first choice too. detrooners aren't usually treated too kindly though but to have a celebrity detrans would certainly cause some discussion. i definitely wouldn't want jkr to come out as anything since lesbians have a hard enough time as it is without queen
terf saying she's one of us.
No. 252652
>>252647If you're questioning, bring it to the questioning thread. It's generally frowned upon to assume being lesbian is a 'phase' to grow out of, if you're feeling attractions to men then call yourself bi, there is no shame in being bi as long as you don't still pretend you're
totally lesbian and still talk about how you want to be with dudes.
Though I relate to the feeling. Before I understood my own feelings I dated a guy in school because he had a crush on
me and I thought I had to. Looking back it was awkward as hell, I didn't really let him touch me and I knew I didn't like him but he was the only person that asked me out so I felt like that was my only option. I still think to this day my family believes a man will come along and I'll be married to him like a good southern wife but I've always been adversed to marriage when imagining my life with a man. Obviously if you are looking for advice from these type of people they would tell you this, I can't tell you either way where your attractions lie, that's on you, but I will say don't just go with an option that is acceptable to other people.
No. 252661
>>252652I don’t feel any attraction to men. Don’t want to do anything with them, fictional or real, they just look boring and a little weird. I wanted to like men for a long time because i wanted to be ‘good’ and not be told I’m gross, and even then i didn’t get attraction to men. If i saw attractive women or women with attractive figures i would look away and try to think of something else so i wouldn’t pervert myself. I’m not questioning, I think I’m just beginning to accept myself as a homosexual. Also, I feel like I’m not masculine enough to be gay. Like my family sometimes says women with short hair ‘look gay’ so because mine is long and i. like skirts i feel like a sussy gay impostor.
>>252651That’s the thing, how do you know you yourself aren’t bi? For some of these women it takes like 30 years to ‘realise’, so could you say all lesbians could just be very very picky bisexuals? Or did these women just prefer women but choose to identify as Lenin until they found the right man? I hear so many people say that sexuality is fluid, but I’ve only liked one gender as long as i have felt attraction.
That being said i am kind of just playing the devils advocate here, i do believe a lot of these ex-lesbians were bi girls with a preference.
And definitely i wouldn’t be visible in any way, it’s not that I’m scared of violence, it’s more that other women may see me as an outsider/not one of them.
>>252656Based, inspirational, and a reminder to all of us to workout kek
No. 252719
>>252385AYRT (late reply), it's tough, so I kinda settled that I won't find anyone. Technically I'm opening my horizons to non-lesbians, I'd love to date a "terfy/queer-phobic" bi woman/febfem that's my type and creative-minded like me too (especially if we could collaborate on original fiction), but then they tend to be too old or too young. I really wish I came out a decade earlier. I try not to be bitter but it's frustrating how half of my younger (early 20s) friends can score a date on Tinder relatively easy (and yes, I've tried that too and almost got catfished since I'm dumb with these things) but women my age are already in LTRs with their sweetheart.
>>252457Heh, I relate a lot although I have autism/ADHD and other "cringe" disorders that affect things. I can LARP as normal pretty easy but I feel like a "how do you do, fellow kids" when it comes to the women I like who are the opposite of me and therefore chemistry-less.
>>252388Sage for slight derail, but didn't Cathy Brennan say she was nonbinary as a way to troll? I'd prefer JKR not come out as a lesbian, because she isn't (and it would have both bad implications due to her being the "
terf queen" and a domestic abuse
victim), but it would be funny if she tried to play TRA's game and be "you know what, I have no gender technically, so I'm agender". Or even, "I identify as a man now you can't call me a
terf since men can't be feminists".
>>252661>That’s the thing, how do you know you yourself aren’t bi? For some of these women it takes like 30 years to ‘realise’I've known some people like that and it's not the majority. You're probably young, so I don't want to be harsh, but in the last thread there was a similar girl who talked about how she only enjoys thinking about women but thinks not liking men is some mental block she can grow out of. Women who realize they're attracted to men later in life tend to have already known in some way but repress it for one reason or another, like guilt or being so attached to "lesbian" as a label. Sexuality is only fluid for bisexuals, some bi people feel like they're 50/50 but go to 90/10 and label themselves as something else during that period.
No. 252808
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I have such a painfully intense crush on my best friend, anons. She said that she feels the same way but we're at very different stages of life, so it wouldn't work. Ughh I wish she wasn't so perfect
No. 252815
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>>247457>>247470For real. Same with Kendall
No. 252826
>>252808Is there no way you two can work to get to a place where you could be on similar stages in life? I can't help but root for shit like this nonita!
>>247457Femme has completely lost its benign meaning, it only means a doctored, synthetic femininity (a la insta models with pounds of makeup and a totally contrived attitude) and every woman who is actually femme but just normal looking now gets gender dysphoria because they feel too masc to be femme. So stupid. I do think the gender-coded sublabels for lesbians is not really necessary anymore since we're not in a place where we have to conform to heteronormative dynamics every time.
Zendaya and Kendall are ever-so-slightly masculine sometimes, but butch?? lol. Zendaya in particular does have mannerisms that are not calculated in the delicate, hyper feminine way we're used to seeing from women in her status which is probably the main reason so many get "gay vibes" from her. Like she behaves in a blunt and kinda dorky manner often times. That and her utter failure to establish chemistry with anyone that she shares a scene with. I wouldn't say she has sexual chemistry with any women either though, she gives me asexual.
No. 252947
>>252936>There is nothing empowering about not shaving, cutting your hair short or wear ugly baggy clothes imo.It may not be super "empowering" in the sense that women's rights will be pushed forward if I do it, but speaking from experience as someone who was pressured by family to do these things or else I would be ugly or unwomanly, it feels a lot better to dress comfortable and not shave or cake my face with makeup.
I only like fem women too, but not
hyperfeminine. You can still look fem or have a naturally feminine body type/demeanor without shaving or wearing makeup (which I highly prefer), since you can still have good hygiene and groom without those things.
>>252941The butch4butch lesbians I know would also love to know where these masc buzzcut dykes even are, lmao. Even on TV most lesbians are mostly fem-looking.
No. 253067
>>252959Pretty sure you just pay more attention to them because they stand out from the crowd, plenty of lesbians look like normal people but they don't catch your eye because they're not kweer activists with a billion flag pins and alternative clothing, and most of them don't visit LGBT places for obvious reasons. For example I look like a completely average woman to the point I always have to hear this "Ew why do
all lesbians dress up so weird???" bullshit from people not aware of my sexuality.
No. 253075
>>253068You sound mentally ill kek
Lesbians are allowed to prefer feminine women
No. 253079
>>253068Well yes they're not normal meaning not conventionally styled. Also why shaving is considered male gaze ?… Having pubes while cunnilingus is a pain. And baggy clothes don't enhance the natural figure of a woman.
>>253067Yeah I was talking about LGBT spaces, bars more specifically.
No. 253092
File: 1648806540521.jpg (651.72 KB, 1159x1500, owlyjules5.jpg)
>>253079very obvious male bait, please nonnies stop responding to the moid
No. 253099
>>253075You can like whoever you like but calling women abnormal because they don't fit your standards and constantly running into mentally ill people means you're not that healthy either.
>>253080This.
No. 253108
>>253099Do you know the definition of normal ? It refers to a norm. I said it was an unpopular opinion but damn I didn't except so much offence.
And if I don't have the same opinions as you I'm necessary a man, right. Ok nice lol !
No. 253125
>>253108So short haired women and women who don't always shave are out of the norm? Have you ever seen women irl?
>>253121My friendgroup consists of straight women and they don't wear makeup, do their hair or shave every day either. Yeah they'd do their makeup and style their hair if we were going out to somewhere fancy or there was an event but otherwise not really. It's not normal to be this obsessed with performative femininity. She's not attracted to women if seeing bodyhair or natural beauty disgusts her.
No. 253161
>>253150I don't think homophobia shouldn't appear in media at all, but it's really nice to have more light-hearted representation too. I like watching sitcoms to unwind, for example, so I'd love a good sitcom with a lesbian main character whose sexuality isn't the butt of a joke.
>>253067This. I'm pretty normal looking and when I go to lesbian events (especially outside of pride) 85+% of the women there look really normal. As someone who prefers butches it's honestly annoying how rare they are and how much competition there is for their attention.
No. 253164
>>253145I prefer when stories don't have homophobia. I respect that it helps you process your stuff but for me it does not help.
I like heavy subjects and hate romantic comedies though so finding a lesbian film/show that is both angsty but isn't about homophobia or lesbians being "crazy" (looking at you Duck Butter) or porny is like… yeah it feels impossible.
No. 253215
>>253168have you considered that some lesbians don't want to be lesbian
like i don't get it some insane women literally go and mutilate their own bodies because they don't wanna be gay but straight instead and try to become men and that's understandable and something that people agree with, yes of course some women go and get their damn tits cut off etc bodyhorror shit because of homophobia, but somehow trying to become straight by having straight sex is completely unthinkable behavior
No. 253224
>>253135>wants shaved long haired women with makeup>well it's not a bimbo!Retard.
>>253168There's definitely a moid baiting, this is one of his posts along with calling lesbians ugly and unkempt. He's trying to start an infight, please don't fall for it.
No. 253228
>>253225Stop trying to start infights. If you wanna bring bisexuals do it in the questioning thread or vent in the vent thread if you just want to vent.
>>253215This is true and very sad.
No. 253245
>>253079>Also why shaving is considered male gaze ?I can't tell if you're dumb or a moid baiting, but do ever remember having your mom force you to shave because it's "gross"/"unladylike" and whatnot? And it's male gazey because moids tend to think being a hairless Barbie doll is peak attractive. Also I don't like crazy forest bushes either but I'd rather a woman at least trim than imitate a child and wax her crotch completely.
>And baggy clothes don't enhance the natural figure of a woman.Ok? Women don't have to always look pretty for you either… Like I said in another post, I only like fem women too but I also like natural femaleness too (no makeup or waxed hair).
>>253145It depends, however I personally find it cathartic when fantasy does have homophobia. I don't have full-on magic fantasy OCs but my worlds do have some form of -ism since I use it as an outlet to vent.
>>253168I'm a "non gold star" because I was assaulted. Does that count as being "pure enough" or should I have just known better, lmao?
No. 253627
File: 1648965301016.gif (300.97 KB, 1280x1280, tumblr_0d016172f79ba3a989807ae…)
bump, be careful with scrolling
No. 253796
>>253784Wtf
nonnie I love piers and arcades lets go on a date ♥
No. 253871
>>247377things I would do w my gf if I had one:
go on road trips
go backpacking
shrooms
start a really bad girl band
take naps
rent airbnb in mountains and go skinny dipping at some waterfall
go for long walks in middle of night
make out by a nice bonfire or fireplace
what would you do?
No. 253906
>>253901Then talk with your gf about it, how you feel uncomfortable. Your girlfriend isn't mentalist, give her a chance by expressing your feelings to her. Otherwise you'll end up resentful.
I would personally tell her to block him since I don't value online relationships+this guy clearly wants to fuck her. But that's a very personal opinion as I don't know you, her or the guy. But the first step is to tell her your feelings are hurt.
No. 253911
>>253608It's one thing to have unrequited feelings for someone who you know isn't attracted to your sex full stop.. it's another thing to voice those feelings repeatedly. He's trying something there. I had male friends do this shit when I was younger and looking back I wish I had cut them off sooner because it's disrespectful for them to keep trying to plant that seed in your head. There's no grey zone where him voicing that over and over again is somehow innocent and not just passive aggressive horny male behaviour. Most people feel unrequited feelings at some point but he's handling it in a douchebag way.
Is she young enough to legit be naive about his nature here? In my early twenties I was legit that naive and I wasn't enjoying the attention, I just didn't see it for what it really is.
No. 253928
>>253608So weird. It can happen to have a male friend crushing on you and shooting his shot, but him trying it over and over? I would be really uncomfortable and cut him off myself. And the fact he even tries to break you two up makes things worse.
Don't even know what to say, I don't understand why is your gf allowing him to be so disrespectful both to her, you and her relationship. She's either bi and keeps him sniffing around because she's half-interested, or she really needs to strengthen her self esteem and set boundaries.
No. 253930
>>253608I would honestly not stand for this and would confront the guy instead of my girlfriend if she's not comfortable enough to be direct with him. Even if they've been friends for a decade it's still extremely inappropriate behavior and very disrespectful. Agree with
>>253928 too, she's either keeping him on standby or needs your intervention.
No. 253973
File: 1649094637365.jpg (65.69 KB, 615x578, E_FQxhIWEAE3kjQ.jpg)
I've never had sex with any other girl than my gf and lately I've been fantasizing about having a hoe phase. I love my girl and I'm not even the kind of person to hoe around but damn, these fantasies are hitting rn.
No. 253975
File: 1649095092204.jpg (85.16 KB, 563x695, 989c2c9a22fda8a496db345524d6e6…)
>>253871oh shit this is so cute
nonnie, it's gonna hurt but I will answer too
-go to the cinema/watch movies at home and spend hours talking about it
-go to museum together, and I take tons of photos of her and all the art pieces
-read in confortable silence in a dedicated comfy area
-take long walks together, especially in nature
-massage her head and play with her hair if it relaxes her
-furnish and decorate a living space where we can feel at home
-encourage eachother to do all sorts of weird art and crafts
-kiss her hands at any moment of the day if she's ok with it (it sound weird but I really love this medieval display of affection kek)
-cook her her favorite food
Feeling very maidenless today kek
No. 253979
>>253908you sound very online, maybe surround yourself with less
toxic content. i'm sorry your parents are homophobic, im sure that doesnt help.
I think your partner is supposed to also be your best friend. there are many different forms of intimacy, maybe you can build them up over time. also you dont have to do anything you dont want. sounds like you dont feel comfortable dating a woman even in your personal space, so it makes sense youre not comfortable being out in public. thats fine, maybe work on your inner acceptance and confidence first and then take some small steps.
btw its okay to be gay and work with children.
No. 254064
>>254059if this has happened to both of you before it seems extra insensitive that she would keep being friends with this guy. i think you need to talk to her and explain what you’re feeling.
i was in a similar situation where i had some casual guy friends who were clearly trying to hit but as i was young and naive at the time (i was 19) i didn’t really realise it for what it was. i told my girlfriend about it and she was told me they clearly don’t have good intentions and are just biding their time so i broke it off with those guys because i ultimately didn’t value their “friendship” as much much as i valued my girlfriend and i also didn’t feel comfortable being friends with dudes who i realised are only sticking around on the off chance they could fuck. it also just wasn’t respectful to my relationship to my girlfriend. it’s different here because this dude sounds like he’s closer friends with your girlfriend but i think any self respecting lesbian wouldn’t keep guys like this around. maybe she’s insecure or maybe she’s secretly bisexual i don’t know but i know that i wouldn’t want to keep being friends with a guy who clearly just wants to fuck.
i used to be naive and projected my own experiences onto these guys. i used to fall for my straight friends and i was able to continue being friends with them whilst i got over my feelings so when i was younger and didn’t really know any guys (went to an all girls school) i assumed men would be the same. they’re not and i was in for a shock as i entered the adult world and realised that plenty of guys only act friendly with girls if they think they can hit.
No. 254103
File: 1649135099614.png (234.87 KB, 500x616, A610F3C9-3653-4FED-8AF7-4CBBBA…)
made me chuckle
No. 254132
>>253970Sounds like a load of excuses on her side and the story seems inconsistent as fuck (now she sexted this guy, now it's another guy, now it was just looking for attention, now it's "self harm") and the trying to turn it around by saying "No actually
I worry that you will drop me for a man" despite what's happening seems textbook bullshit. I've seen this before.
I got a bad feeling about this, and you probably have it too since you mentioned getting bad vibes from this, but I do hope we're both wrong and there's nothing going on between your gf and this guy. Did you settle the thing about this guy sniffing around and trying to break you up? Is she going to cut him off or stop his insinuations in any way?
No. 254179
>>254166She knows. Her outlook on her past was that it didn't matter but for me it does, so there was some misalignment in terms of expectations on disclosure between us. We had a talk about all of it. Bottom line is neither one of us wants a bi partner and we agreed to confront the other if one of us has a late bloomer situation.
Also just wanna clarify on an earlier point made, it was
my speculation that the sexting was self harm at a time where she was dealing with being dumped by her transitioning gf, not something she said as justification. Also there is only one guy involved in this whole thing, it was never multiple guys. Not sure what gave that impression. Again thanks a lot to the nonitas that chimed in regardless. It means a lot to get perspective and I feel stronger as far as facing future consequences go.
No. 254275
>>254267the mental illness is you being pressed at other people's sexual preferences and constantly talking about how horrible men are while comparing lesbians to them at every chance you get just because some don't want to date bisexuals you lesbophobic creep
>>254265yeah and it's the bis
No. 254277
>>254269You don't get why men and lesbians get mad about
being cheated on? Did you even understand what was being discussed or did you just drop by to insult lesbians
No. 254352
>>254305>you're just like men for not wanting to be cheated on or lied to about your partner's sexualitythey think it's fine to casually call lesbians psychos just for openly daring to say they've never dated/fucked a man, and it's perfectly ok to call lesbians incel men every 5 seconds for having a problem with literal cheaters, but i can't call them a bisluts and dick suckers for those things or else they jump to the lesbophobe's/cheater's defense by saying
>>254264 "lesbians behaving like incels. not even surprised" as their big feminist gotcha lol
No. 254355
>>254243Because there are newfags/moids who intentionally try to start lesbian/bisexual infights. I don't care about goldstar shit and hate how it's brought up as a gotcha in every retarded infight. Literally a lesbian refusing to date someone because they've been dating men for years isn't lesbo/biphobia, it's a preference and lesbians probably know most of those girls will attempt to settle down with men later so wasting time on them is useless.
>>254303You sound like one of those kiwifags who are upset lesbians won't date him to resort to calling them incels in a poor attempt to uno-reverse. Kek.
No. 254363
>>254360lmao i’m a gold star too and it’s not because I figured it out before men it’s because the few times men tried to be intimate with me I sperged out and left.
It was a literal “dad come get me I’m scared”
No. 254411
>>254351you know that acting like an incel has different meaning nowadays ie you act like a misogynist and calling women dicksuckers is exactly that. you are a misogynist.
but you know what since both of you
>>254355 focus so much on the incel quip instead of what i actually said, that calling women dickriders and bisluts is indeed psycho (and dare i say it again, incelic) behavior, i kinda think that insult hit the target! hope you get dates soon
(infighting) No. 254418
>>254305Except you are just like men for caring about the gender a woman leaves you for. Stop being gross and entitled. Bisexuals date both genders so who gives a shit? If she dumps you then it doesnt make her bisexuality any less
valid. Some of you lescels are insane
No. 254420
File: 1649259968196.jpeg (57.55 KB, 392x612, FCAE2E45-9F7C-44E0-81D6-FD9A2D…)
>>254275No one wants you kek
I dont give a fuck if lesbians dont date bisexual women but if you date one and she leaves you for a man and you act as if it invalidates her bisexuality then youre just as gross as an entitled moid who rages. For people who whine about “MUH HOMOPHOBIA” so much you have no issue invalidating someones sexuality all the time and acting just as insufferable as straight people
(infighting) No. 254422
>>254282>>254277A bisexual woman dumping you for a man isnt being cheated on kek
You truly cant read. All i said was it doesnt fucking matter if she dumps you for a woman or a man shes still bisexual and it doesnt make her attraction to women any less
valid.
No. 254427
>>254422Dear BPD-chan, the topic of discussion was a (possible) lesbian-identified bisexual woman cheating on her gf with her male friend. It's you who can't read.
You can also reply to multiple posts in the same post, you don't have to shit up the entire thread with your non-sequitur ramblings every time you browse it.
No. 254429
File: 1649262302538.jpg (15.33 KB, 370x370, pizza cat.jpg)
Sorry to sperg but I'm so tired ladies, so fucking tired of the lack of decent (or actual) lesbians in my city, it's all either fucking troons (ffs even if you chopped your disgusting dick off hell no will I EVER want to sleep with a scrote at all, and no one is going to gaslight me into thinking this is acceptable, nasty ass incels) but the only other options is a specific type of butch lesbian I just can't stand (short/obese/dress and act like 13 year old boys and come with the same edgy "humor" and shit, like I went on a date with one but she didn't realize I'm just a pale af Arab and called some poor hijabi girl minding her business a sand ni**) like where can I find a cool, tall woman with nice arms who will let me eat her out and we can watch my awful turkish dramas and knafeh with?
No. 254440
>>254420>>254411>>254404>>254422Obsessed BPD-chans shitting up a thread that's not even theirs.
Stop crying about how leaving a woman for a man and cheating on her with a man is based in the same sentence you call any lesbian that rejects you incel. Kek.
Anon is right you really are cockbreaths because you simply can't keep cocks and men out of your mouth, everything has to be about them and you need to shit up threads about how it's so based normal that bi women will leave and cheat on lesbians with shitty men and that this totally doesn't mean lesbians can "invalidate" their true and honest homosexuality.
No. 254446
File: 1649265395819.png (112.34 KB, 840x856, 1618355819801.png)
88% of bisexuels are in a heterosexual relationship. It's then understandable for a gay person to not engage with bisexuals. Especially since with age, the social pressure to be with the opposite sex increases.
Before judging the fear of some lesbians, check the facts. Their fear is valid.
No. 254447
>>254440It's a moid baiting once again. "You're just like genderbent incels!!111" is their go-to insult they love to throw around like confetti.
That said it's annoying when bis don't understand how hurtful it is to be left for a man, 90% of bisexuals are in a heterosexual relationship because so many have a lesbian bout in their 20's and then once their biological clock starts ticking or they leave college for regular work life with normies they swiftly marry the first Nigel they come across. So a lot of lesbians just don't see the point in wasting their time with them. Plus as someone who actually is dating a bisexual girl it's gross when she's gushing over sexy moids that I find hideous or tolerable at best.
No. 254458
>>254429No advice to give but you sound cute
nonnie. I hope you can find the cool, tall woman of your dreams soon!
No. 254486
>>254429Come to Paris anon, I adore kadaif.
Now that I'm thinking about it. What's your typical first date anons and do you pay ? I like gallantry but not many women returned me the favor lol. Usually it's a beer in a seedy bar dressed in jeans. Which is sad. I think getting dressed and going to a nice place is so seductive.
No. 254526
>>254523>you expect anyone to believe you're either not a moid or that fucking so many has done irreversible mental damageKek. I love you anon. That dumbass has been mocking lesbians the whole time but got so
triggered when someone called her a dicksucker or whatever which is actually supposed to be a
valid part of her sexuality.
No. 254572
>>254458thank you queen, hope nothing but love and good arabic food for you
>>254486very diff but I once dated a Native girl and she took me to her families potluck and it was so nice and fun for our second date after I paid for our first date. They kept on feeding me and I really loved the hospitality (also she had these amazing abs, like damn I miss her so much now)
No. 254797
>>254440>>254447>>254522again, what schizophrenia is this.
once again i see the incel insults hit the target, hope you get dates soon you incelic misogynists and so on.
lescel meme is real sometimes, you can cry about lesbophobia but i am a lesbian myself and i actually do not date bisexual women myself either kek, i just can go on about it without throwing tantrums about it.
i can reject women without calling them cocksuckers and other unhinged INCEL LITE behavior, and i personally never even said anything about lesbians having to date bis, just that you don't need to insult women but you are so unhinged in your paranoia that just saying that mayhaps calling women dickriders is wrong it makes you lose your shit over it, which honestly is way more BPD-like behavior. the black and white thinking and all that, you know.
and funny thing that i have noticed during the years especially in online circles is that the most unhinged cockbreath insult throwing maniacs often turn out to be bisexuals themselves kekkkk
No. 254830
>>254814>Why are you calling lesbians misogynistic menthat's your own insecurities speaking. i never called you a man, i called you incel like. i happen to be one of those people who thinks women can be misogynist too and i don't think women are good people by just the virtue of being women, and that women have some responsibility over their behavior. like i actually do think some bisexual women uphold lesbophobic things with their behavior like calling themselves lesbians while dating men
if you read that calling you a man that's your own damn problem and your own insecurities speaking. again and again, what i said was "calling women dickriders and cocksuckers is wrong and misogynist" and you throw a tantrum about it
No. 254832
>>254816I like your energy anon. I wish I could say I'm super picky with personalities but for me I look for intense physical attraction first. If that's not there, I'm out. My attraction isn't for a narrow type so I just meet people and sometimes there is a magnetic draw, none of these women even look similar besides being slim and having nice skin. After the initial attraction I start to discern traits more and see if I can make a relationship work with her. Things I look for are an ability to function independently, ability to set boundaries and respect them, self confidence or at least an interest in self-care. Intellect and sense of humor are big too, I want there to be wit in our conversations. I look for tenderness less than I should. Sometimes I get stuck on a woman who is so cerebrally compatible but does not have the emotional bandwidth. Emotional connections are hard for me to forge due to fear as well, I hide myself sometimes. So a certain disarming force from my gf is a huge plus.
I was lucky enough to find someone who fits what I'm looking for and she has actually avoided dating for years so she could find someone she is truly invested in and impressed by. It's a little overwhelming to be told I'm exactly the kind of woman she has been looking for but it also makes me feel kinda proud.
No. 254852
>>254848I really can't think of a better choice. I assumed it would be easier to hide since we'd be living in different continents. I know they'd never hunt me down if they did find out, they're lovely people who were
victims of indoctrination. It's just that they're very old and frail and telling them that I'm gay is basically saying "Hey the daughter that you raised and love is going to suffer in hell for eternity". That would destroy them, I don't want to risk making them go through that. Cutting them off isn't much better either because I still love them very much despite everything. This issue has been on the back of my mind for years now, and it's only gotten worse as they age/get sick and need my help more. All I can do for now is prepare to leave and hope I figure it out once I'm more or less stable abroad
No. 254854
>>254852NTA but it's extra hard to find someone in the west willing to live a double life like that, especially if you move to a city and not somewhere more rural. I personally would not date someone who needs to keep me a secret in any capacity. I want my partner to be fully out and able to include me in any reasonable activity like work parties or family functions.
I'm an immigrant from a Muslim country, though grew up with a non-muslim family. It isn't your responsibility to coddle your parents but I get why you don't wanna come out to them anyway. Tough situation, you're totally right to just focus on relocating for now. Best of luck!
No. 254857
>>254832Happy and proud for you also!
>>254841I hope you focus on yourself and escape asap also! Check out Rainbow Railroad in Canada, they help LGBT people escape their own home countries, if you can write to them or similar organizations to help you? For me I was lucky in that while my mom is Christian but ironically more disappointed in me but thankfully she has come around, my dad who is Muslim didn't mind at all, but that's more for a sad family history, where his brother/my uncle who was gay was sadly killed for it back in the 90s.
But for me the situation wouldn't turn me off, I dated women who have had to hide it from their families, but they were low contact with them and I wouldn't want to ever pressure them into revealing themselves because I know how dangerous it can be but it would be frustrating (and was for me at times) I know to have to live your life hiding such a big part of it, sorry habibi nonna I don't have any solid advice really to give I guess but I hope your situation really does improve and you find love and acceptance wherever you end up!!
No. 254870
>>254830lmao no several anons commented calling lesbians men, just as bad as men or simply categorising us as the same as men for caring about being cheated on and the only reason anyone called you dickriders and cocksuckers (which is supposed to be a
valid part of your bisexuality anyway so what's with the shame?) is because bigen was busy calling lesbians who've never been with men psycho shit, nutters, moids and saying they harass women when clearly the opposite is true. now you're here with the "incel militant secretly bi" projection when it's actually bis who want lesbians to date them and flipped out because some of us said no
No. 254876
>>254830Based
nonny. Unfortunately women here have no problems using incel words (like cocksuckers, talking about how women suck dick etc) just like moids but will get upset if you call them out on it. Just typical incel lite behavior
No. 254884
>>254877You're ashamed of your own sexuality. Sucking dick is literally a part of your sexuality and it's not an insult because of that fact alone.
>>254875Some bi women mocked lesbians who weren't "goldstar" because of abuse or wrong choices and tried to argue they must be bi too, since they fucked a man once. They also called lesbians psychos if they were goldstars. Anon called only those bi women cocksuckers, she didn't randomly attack everyone and even then, her calling them cocksukers isn't much different than bi women thinking most lesbians would fuck men because they themselves don't.
No. 254910
>>254841my girlfriend is from east asia and from a very conservative christian family. she was straight up with me when we first started dating and said she can’t tell her family she’s gay. they wouldn’t understand and she’d likely be disowned. she actually broke down in tears to me like 4 months into our relationship because she didn’t think we would be able to get married and she didn’t want to disappoint me. now three years on she is planning to fully immigrate to my more liberal country where we will live together. not so sure about marriage yet - she said she’d feel weird if we got married and my entire family was at the wedding and she just had a few friends who knew she was gay, but i’m not too fussed.
really you should be honest straight away about this, especially if you think the woman you’re into is looking for a serious relationship, it’s just a waste of both of your time if you’re not. and don’t stay with anyone who says they’re okay with it but then pressures you into coming out
No. 254915
>>254870>which is supposed to be a valid part of your bisexuality anyway again with the schizophrenia. anyone who says calling women cocksuckers is wrong must be a bisexual evil witch bitch woman or whatever, you think lesbianism is some sort of political identity instead of a sexuality so you cannot accept that some lesbians like me disagree with you. you think lesbianism is some sort of political identity.
you are blaming me for shit i never said. all i said is that calling women dick riders is wrong and incel like, but because you think lesbianism is a personality or some sort of act you personally follow instead of just simple sexual attraction to women you cannot accept that some lesbians think differently from you! sorry polilezzie but it doesn't work like that
>>254884plike here. polilezzie bullshit, if someone disagrees with you you cannot comprehent that they share a sexuality with you because you view sexuality as a personality and a political identity
No. 254919
>>254917oh now we're at the "i was just acting retarded" part of polilez bullshit.
i dunno you seem to think calling women dicksuckers is hurtful enough since you wanna use those words as insults towards other women, don't try to act as if you never thought you weren't trying to hurt others when you used those words. we live in a culture in which women are made feel dirty and disgusting about their own sexualities and reducing women into nothing but "dicksuckers" or "cockbreaths" is also centering those women around men, that they as persons are nothing but servants to males and their cocks.
and speaking of insults, rugmuncher was/is an insult that lesbians heard very often and lesbians were insulted for wanting to lick pussy but hey if being a lesbian is nothing but an online identity for you i guess you never ever had to hear those insults. like sure i "munch the rug" but still people who called me a rugmuncher used that word to insult me, to make me ashamed of my sexuality, to make me seem perverted etc no matter how that describes my real sexual behavior. they meant to insult and shame me, you meant to insult and shame others at least be honest enough like the homophobes who happily admit that they invent and use words like rugmuncher to insult others and don't try to act coy like "well how is calling women cockbreaths insulting anyone" fucking own it at least coward
No. 254920
File: 1649371020588.jpg (33.48 KB, 735x431, 58b17702e63cf0104b966ae1fd1a5e…)
Everybody shut up and look at this
No. 254926
File: 1649371856834.jpg (678.64 KB, 2048x1724, 1172902_743728178971027_172602…)
>>254923offtopic but andrea dworken never even been translated to my language now that i googled her smh should have been born 40 years earlier and i could have been a feminist scholar
ANYWAY let's talk about happy stuff i post granny dreams of life being together with your wife pictures
No. 254930
File: 1649372154008.jpg (942.08 KB, 818x1160, scan0008.jpg)
>>254929i want this life so much
No. 254932
>>254926>>254923Excuse your ignorance, but as a lesbian it's pretty hard not to know what a feminist lesbian is and who their influences are.
Why? Because your types have invaded our community since the beginning of time to be the shining lights and anti-misogyny guard dogs for the poor minority of women who suck dick. Yes, straight and bi women tend to suck dick. Sorry that trigers your polilez spidey senses.
Keep writing essays about real lesbians being men lite or incels because lesbians are grossed out by their girlfriends lying about their sexuality and cheating, or because lesbians can beat lesbophobes at their own game by dishing out some deserved backlash, cheapshots or not.
We don't exist for you - or the
victims of men that you're whiteknighting - to escape the evilness of men which you just ranted about here like a safe space. Lesbianism isn't your radical feminist haven where we have to accept being stepped on because a man was mean to you once and lesbians standing up against your bullshit reminds you of it. Get help.
No. 254933
File: 1649372319555.jpg (184.4 KB, 350x500, 26-Howling.jpg)
>>254930i can post more of this artist if you want but if you don't like them sorry for the spam but this is like my granny dream to have a wife to have fun with as a granny
No. 254935
File: 1649372443818.jpg (78.69 KB, 500x705, 22_gummor.jpg)
>>254932>Keep writing essays about real lesbians being mennever did, you are letting your own insecurities speak again. blahblalbhalblah we dont exict to you blaablaa paranoia shit just because i said that calling women cocksucker is wrong take your
victim shit and shove it up your ass idiot
No. 254937
>>254935>Keep writing essays about real lesbians being men lite or incels because lesbians are grossed out by their girlfriends lying about their sexuality and cheating, or because lesbians can beat lesbophobes at their own game by dishing out some deserved backlash, cheapshots or not.Try harder.
In the future, avoid butting into /lg/ conversations that you're not a part of, just to use single words from them as an excuse to spam unrelated tirades for days, and then pretend to act surprised when multiple people tell you you definitely don't understand what was happening and only sound deranged.
That way you won't be warned by a mod for infighting once again.
No. 254939
File: 1649373073618.jpg (50.5 KB, 350x500, gfgdfg.jpg)
>>254937perhaps multiple people are idiotic and at least it is me who actually has dreams of growing old together with a woman i love! report me again for saying that calling women cocksuckers is wrong lmao polilezzie
No. 254940
>>254939I have to give you credit for how dedicated you are to projecting.
>>254440Why does every BPD chan on this board type exactly the same too? I always get a good laugh from the frenzied low caps stan twitter girlboss hysterics.
No. 254941
File: 1649373448999.jpg (41.71 KB, 293x419, 66_gummor-293x419.jpg)
>>254940bpd obsession kinda screams like projection, once again, black and white thinking. you cannot accept that people who share your sexuality could have different opinions from you
and i at least tried to bring this thread into more positive place with my art posts but i guess it is in vain! anyway
No. 254942
File: 1649373664861.jpg (295.24 KB, 693x1000, melaughingat.jpg)
>>254941be happy and become a granny with your wife like i said this is my dream life to be fat and old and wrinkly and happy
No. 254944
>>254941When at least three different anons can see the BPD in you from miles away, it's time to take your fingers off the keyboard for a second. Just one second.
And your self-righteous feminist lectures against lesbians - for not coddling bisexuals being lesbophobic - rest on your own inability to accept lesbians have different opinions from you on these subjects, and cries of "but I'm defending women from misogyny by calling you incels" aren't your get out of jail free card for literally just defending lesbophobes from backlash.
You do not even understand what the conversation was because your personality disorder wasn't part of it before it started bombing the thread to shreds with buzzwords.
>and i at least tried to bring this thread into more positive place with my art posts but i guess it is in vain! anywayYou mean by continuing to spam? The past 20 shitposts are yours.
No. 254945
>>254944me: "calling women cocksuckers is wrong"
you: AAGAHGUHAHGAHAH BPD BPD INSANE ALSSADHSDGDSAJ
look i don't give a shit what you mentally ill women think, i know i am right: insulting women is wrong, no matter what great cause you have behind those insults, i don't create all these conspiracy stories inside my head about you or anyone else. i just say: insulting women with terms like cockbreath is wrong, never questioned are you a woman, never came up with these conspiracy theories of you being a kiwiperson or something, or being a person from some other thread
i just judged your behavior in this thread, called a spade a spade, you throw a tantrum, put words in my mouth, form whatever enemy image of me about me inside of your head
because i said calling women cocksuckers isn't very nice
lol
No. 254946
File: 1649374566296.jpg (597.75 KB, 853x1200, juliste3toonattu-1.jpg)
anyway i came back to post more art
No. 254949
File: 1649374667130.jpg (210.01 KB, 1200x847, 1920-rotated.jpg)
>>254948art
>>254947unhinged. lol?
No. 254952
>>254947like you are not actually responding to things i say but things you think i say? my esl of course makes my words unclear but my point wasn't anything about heterophobia?
weirdoes you are
No. 254954
File: 1649374868619.jpg (302.6 KB, 859x1200, kuningattaret.jpg)
>>254951unhinged? lol. you are not arguing with me but with some imaginary person?
No. 254956
File: 1649375108040.jpg (668.37 KB, 631x863, Inge_Mummot_34.jpg)
>>254953this is legit weird behavior like i might have beenb funny funny womaning here before but you are WEIRD
No. 254960
File: 1649376421452.jpg (94.19 KB, 803x696, 1633904120366.jpg)
Both of you shut the fuck up.
No. 254962
File: 1649376551405.jpg (60.97 KB, 350x350, chuisvenue_kansi_web-350x350.j…)
i'm screaming because of this thread i was trying to find work from this one lesbian artist from my country but instead i found this many years old article from this one person i know in real life in one of my country's biggest newspapers talking about how she is a lesbian who fell in love with a man?
okay i gotta admit i understand why people are so paranoid but oh my god lol never thought that she would be like that
but i try to bring more happy things so more art
No. 254965
File: 1649376891263.jpg (41.26 KB, 405x382, fdfwf.jpg)
>>254964"for hygienic reasons i will become a lesbian"
No. 254970
>>254968oh yeah did you know smoking was seen as a lesbian thing one point so in old movie smoking woman was a dog whisle for a lesbian
rökande kvinnor är lesbiska
No. 254973
File: 1649378307328.jpg (358.59 KB, 1024x1014, cowcig.jpg)
>>254949love this art, anon. keep em coming
No. 254980
File: 1649379275537.jpg (86.39 KB, 350x494, i-ringen.jpg)
>>254979this artist made a lesbian comic but i don't know if it is in english?
No. 255192
File: 1649449611627.jpg (647.14 KB, 2560x1704, GettyImages-1205358157.jpg)
at what point do you consider age gaps to be problematic in a lesbian relationship? 5, 10, 15, 20+ years? do you think is the same as heterosexual relationships?
No. 255212
>>255192It's not the same as het age gaps. If both parties are past their 20s it's not really
problematic imo, but while in one's 20s it's important to avoid age gaps bigger than 3 years imo. I personally don't like the idea of dating someone other than my peers.
No. 255215
>>255192Even though I know it happens, I don't think women generally can be as predatory as older men dating younger women. But for example someone in their late 30's dating a girl in her early 20's for example is sketchy in other ways, it makes me wonder if she has some emotional problems that cause her not to connect with people her own age, not that she's outright exploiting the younger girl like a man would. But stuff like someone in her mid 20's dating a woman in her early 30's isn't
problematic at all to me. It depends a lot of the context and their age group, like once you reach your mid 40's there doesn't seem to be a limit to how much older your partner is.
No. 255280
File: 1649464146634.jpg (63.7 KB, 604x368, kathy.jpg)
>>255192I'm 18 but mostly attracted to women who are 45-80. I don't think age gaps are inherently bad if the younger person is over say 25, so right now (even though it's my fantasy) I'd side eye the shit out of a 50 yr old lez who wanted anything more than a one night stand. I can't wait to get older lol, women only get lovelier with age
No. 255307
>>255280Are you saying you would date someone up to 80 years old?!? Not judging I just couldn't see myself
dating anyone as old as my mom or older than my grandma. I'm in my early 20s and would probably only date someone in their early 30s at most.
I saw a video with a large age gapped couple they were getting a lot of flack because they wanted to have a baby. People were more mad about them wanting to have a baby with their age gap than they were about them being a lesbian couple which is kinda funny, no one bats an eye when there is a big age gap hetero couple and the moid accidentally gets the younger girl pregnant, if there's nothing wrong with that what's the problem with this?
No. 255332
>>255307Probably healthier than basic age gap hetero couple where moid gets the girl pregnant to trap her or has a weird fertile young girl fetish and only uses her for that. Ew.
>>255280You and me both, anon. It's one of the reasons I'm not afraid of aging, I see older women as beautiful and every sign of aging only adds to women's beauty.
No. 255419
>>255381nooo anon…i want this so badly. i want our hallway to be filled with pictures of stuff we did together, and to slow dance in our living room in candlelight
>mfw i just realised im describing Ellie and Carl from Up if they were lesbians>>255398when i was growing up i remember being like 'omg booba booba' and now i still appreciate them, it's just a little calmed down. i do think we get used to our own bodies.
anyway i've become a thigh enjoyer but if i really like a girl everything she does is attractive and looks matter less
No. 255428
>>255405I feel this way about nudity too, I took a bunch of art classes and I don't really view a fully nude body as inherently sexual or provocative like moids do, it's literally just the human form. I think it's hotter if someone is halfway in their clothes if that makes sense. I saw this female firefighter in the store the other day halfway in uniform doing casual shopping and thought that was extremely attractive to me.
>>255416I wonder if we're attracted to traits we don't have, like I used to want darker skin so bad and now I find tan skin super attractive. I'm also kinda average height and like taller girls, but I'm not picky about heights either.
>>255419Yes personality makes or breaks attraction for me, it doesn't matter if they are cute if they are annoying. But their appearance can grow on me if I like their energy. I still do hope whatever physical traits I have someone will enjoy and i will enjoy hers too
No. 255576
File: 1649605017403.jpg (46.9 KB, 564x705, 539b52c02b8f9d5ff5a813fa380143…)
I have a faint memory of this being discussed before but do you nonnies think you can be butch with long hair? I usually identify as butch due to having masculine mannerisms, way of dressing and all the other things but I like keeping my hair at almost waist length. I don't feel long hair is necessarily "effeminate" because plenty of masculine men like to grow theirs out but very often the classification seems to be based on hair length (I'm also a bit of a metalhead so I'm biased). I used to date a girl who had short hair and despite dressing and acting super feminine she was read as a "butch", does having long hair but otherwise masculine vibe just automatically make you "just" a tomboy or a futch?
I'm probably just insecure but I often feel like the cute girls I meet are borderline disappointed that I sport long hair because they want a Male Light complete with an undercut and a pair of gigantic biceps.
No. 255587
File: 1649607565912.jpeg (194.86 KB, 1557x2000, image.jpeg)
>>255576Butch to me doesn't mean short hair and cargo shorts, it can be more of someone's mannerisms or they way she talks. Long hair length isn't always associated with masc/femme energy just as an example Audrey Hepburn characteristically had short hair and I doubt anyone would call her butch for it.
No. 255590
>>255576The hair alone doesn't make or break it but like you said to outsiders it can often be the very first thing they see. I'd never look at a woman in a dress with a pixie cut and think 'ah yes butch' but I feel like some men might manage to. It's a combination of things that come together.
Maybe getting ot but butch mannerisms and body language like in that pic.. I'm butch leaning myself and I sometimes get second hand embarrasment from how ott some womens masc body language is. Idk why I get like that but I do. It's not like I don't have a bit of it going on myself but sometimes it reaches a level that feels too put on?
No. 255640
>>255590idk, i date butches almost exclusively and i think it's kind of cute. it's a social signifier like any other, so it makes sense that they want it to be immediately noticeable - even when they're obviously playing it up i think it's more endearing than cringy
i'm not trying to condescend or armchair psychoanalyze you or anything but it sounds a little like you're worried other women will see you the way you see them.
No. 255846
File: 1649706785284.jpg (62.74 KB, 1280x720, FKebLfzXEAYOc0l.jpg)
I'm fucking tired of people policing what lesbians can and can't do. Why are we always living in other people's heads rent free? The only people that should be concerned with what lesbians are doing are other lesbians. Fucking exhausting.
Picrel whenever a lesbian mentions doing anything at all to men, bis, hets, troons, and normie women.
No. 256749
File: 1650100227918.jpg (79.92 KB, 564x1002, 3c90d1b5e0f265a18efd72fb1dfe4a…)
Related to the discussion above but god, I need to vent. I fucking HATE it when obvious bihets butt in to the discussion about LGB rights to act like bigoted straights. You know the type, the one who says shit like "I agree that Pride is unnecessary, gay people have enough rights already" and "I'm bi and I don't mind homophobic jokes tee hee" or "I'm bi and I agree that LGB people are encouraging dangerous heterophobia". Sis you have been dating men exclusively for the past decade and you're engaged or married to a moid so keep your fucking mouth shut. You have never been subjected to legitimate homophobia and this """hate from the LGB community""" you get for being """bisexual""" is because you're a straight person completely unempathetic and oblivious to the struggles gay people face and thus unable to understand the nuance in making an ironic joke about straight people to demonstrate what gay people have to deal with on a daily basis. Not because you're """bisexual""" (or more often "pansexual") and mean lesbians and gays and other bis are bullying you for no reason at all. Fuck off.
No. 256879
How can you tell whether you are attracted to someone or you just really admire them?
i thought i just wanted to be this woman's friend but now i'm psychoanalyzing a text i sent her. i think i'm might be infatuated to her.
btw i'm not questioning, i know i'm lesbian.
>>256331>Is it going to end when they make normies start to hate lesbian and gays again?no, it's when the generation that calls themself queer to look quirky gets to the marrying and starting a family age. then it's not cool to be lesbian/gay anymore.
No. 256963
>>256960There's a lesbian bar nearish to me called Pearls.
I like >lebanese
No. 256997
>>256969Lmao the contrast between woman enjoyer and pussy faggot you’re like the jeckyl and hyde of lesbians
>>256967Yes but the one positive about being in a minority group is that you are allowed to say more slurs, and that is epic
>>256963>LebaneseAdded to the list and that gave me a kek
No. 257418
File: 1650361874389.jpg (266.55 KB, 1028x1455, bdp.jpg)
very nice flier i saw. i love butches in denim
No. 257538
File: 1650418535152.jpg (8.08 KB, 480x360, hqdefault.jpg)
In your experiences, which do you think is more prone to hookups, butches or femmes? I really want to just hookup with someone to get this out of my system, but I'm also at odds about my monogamous feelings, I don't want to be just an 'experience' for someone. I wish it could work out and turn into a relationship after that, but usually that's not how it pans out.
No. 257542
>>257519Just be honest and end it, I'd be so depressed if my girlfriend talked about me like this.
>>256967Idk anon I thought pearl divers and lady gardeners were cute lol
No. 257587
>>257580Because oddly, I’m the one not wanting to be intimate not her. And I don’t exactly know why.
All of you tell me Im disgusting and that I should dumb her but its been years we’re together. I love
No. 257588
>>257587*I love her.
I wanted to know if there was any of you who went through a similar experience and how you dealt with it. Not judgement.
No. 257599
>>257588we deal with it by not being pieces of shit
damn I feel bad for your girlfriend. just let her go, she deserves someone that wants to touch her, doesn't want to cheat and make excuses for it, someone better than you.
>no judgementthen stop being so shit
No. 257606
>>257588you're flirting with other girls behind your girlfriend's back and contemplating cheating on her, did you really expect not to get judgement? fuck outta here with the
victim mentality, your girlfriend is the
victim here. break up with her if you really love her because as other anons said, she deserves better than you and you're wasting her time
No. 257612
>>257606I get the hostility, I'm definitely not the
victim. But some qualified advices would be great. I can't be the only one to have gone through intimacy issues in her relationship, right?
No. 257613
>>257519>>257587Do the decent thing and break the news to her now before it escalates to you fully cheating. Being consumed with those thoughts isn't something you can work your way back from or salvage esp as you're flirting already. Be mindful of how it would feel to be on her side of things, kept in the dark about this, your time wasted. Even that is insulting. There's a reason why you're being judged, it's because she's in a worse position than you right now, you're in a position to either really hurt her or be better than that.
It always sucks to end a relationship (first love in particular) but being cheated on goes on to affect that other person for years into their future. Leaves them with trust issues and sometimes image and self esteem issues that affect their future relationships too. It's kinder to end it now because wasting her time or letting it escalate is legit a really shitty thing to do to someone. This is bigger than just you and her. This is you contemplating damaging someone in a way that will stick with them. And you've already crossed lines. Like listen to the judgement because you need to hear it.
No. 257635
>>257612>qualified advise stop acting like a scrote and break up with her
you already hurt her by not being intimate with her and not communicating, she probably already has some issues because of it you moid
No. 257900
>>257869I can't imagine being jealous of gay men and their std-infested asses but you do you anon
your best bet for casual sex tho is probably lesbians that are in open relationships, I see them all the time on dating apps
No. 257926
I confess: I love cavewomen.
Not real cavewomen. I mean Eep from The Croods was kind of a baddie but I digress
There’s this really tall and awkward girl from my old workplace. Romanian, doesn’t speak so much English. We’re the youngest there, most people our age wouldn’t work like this. And she’s so. Bloody. Awkward. Can’t make normal eye contact, can’t sit in a chair on lunchbreak without stretching her long legs in every direction. But she’s so comfortable with her gangly awkwardness, she reminds me of a cavewoman. She’s awkwardly taking up space and it reminds me of a cavewoman in a city for the first time. I can’t explain the appeal, but I became rather infatuated from afar, or close, as we sat opposite each other and she didn’t know how much eye contact was appropriate so she just stared straight at me like it was normal, no fear, but without vitriol. I think I adore awkward women. Especially when they own it so fearlessly. Gosh I want her to throw me ooga booga
Sorry in advance if this confession was bizarre and offensive.
>>257904spicy
No. 257931
File: 1650573807547.jpg (90.61 KB, 820x635, cloris-leachman-the-croods-eep…)
>>257926I get you
Ungaaa bungaaaa
No. 258232
>>258143Enough. Shut the fuck up. Read the thread already.
Anyway what kinda flowers should I buy for my gf this weekend? It's out first spring together so I wanna be sweet.
No. 258242
>>258232A big beautiful mix with lots of texture and a warm color scheme, I'm thinking white, orange, yellow, pink. Sunflowers, dahlias, daisies, wildflowers, carnations, sprigs of lavender, maybe black eyed Susans.
No. 258271
File: 1650696742565.png (192.08 KB, 999x1500, AmoL-F16KwqUTanJ-IzTxA_1935-17…)
I'm going to suggest to my gf that we make lovers eye jewelry! I think it's so lovely and personalized and romantic, plus we can have a day where we make them together. I love her so much anons
No. 258274
File: 1650697020509.jpeg (251.6 KB, 1400x1151, eye miniature 2.jpeg)
>>258271That's a lovely idea! I've always wanted to do the same thing.
No. 258316
File: 1650720211982.png (1.65 MB, 1112x1014, hahaha.png)
A lesbian march is taking place in Paris today. Guess who was chosen to represent it? A Muslim and a man.
Everything is fine ! Crazy how we're going backward.
No. 258317
>>258316What a joke.
How many out and proud hijabi lesbian muslims are there btw? Considering the entire religion is based on not saying no to men.
No. 258528
>>258525Nonna, I think you've really just had terrible luck. I absolutely can't stand men, not their smell, or their voices, let alone the way they look (or act kek.) I'm not really into femmes either, I just can't stand men and want absolutely nothing to do with them, I don't talk to them and I don't go into their spaces.
I'm with a longterm gf and she feels the exact same way and has since she was very young. Please believe me when I say you've just had very bad luck with women. Rough women or soft women, I would prefer ANY woman over a scrote and I think any lesbian would tell you the same.
No. 258554
>>258525I kind of think this is a view every woman has had in teenage years/ early 20s. And then as you slowly learn to love, trust and be proud of yourself that societal pressure to look up to men and think they're always "right" goes away. Reading pink pill etc also can help not feel below men.
And some lesbians (especially young ones) like to really adhere to the butch/femme (top/bottom)dynamic. So you might feel you have to put yourself in these boxes or else. Not all lesbians are like that and would like you however you are as long as you are the genuine you.
No. 258567
>>258525I can sort of relate. I made the mistake of sleeping with several straight bicurious women in the past and they of course all went back to men. I've only had one real girlfriend who didn't go back to men and actually turned out to be a lesbian too. Of course you're never going to be good enough for a straight woman or a Kinsey 1-2 bisexual. Even a hook up hurts when they go back to men afterwards and I started to question myself, wondering if I did anything against their consent, since they weren't really into women apparently. Other times I stopped an encounter before it even got that far, because I noticed that she's probably just straight and wanting to ~experiment~. Right after that one of my best friends decided to transition and tried to encourage me to transition too, which caused me to cut contact. Now I'm mainly angry that scrotes have it so easy and they still fuck it up. Women put them on a pedestal and will go above and beyond for them, but even washing their own ass and doing nice things for women is too much to ask. They can't give women orgasms, but it doesn't matter, even when they don't know how to use their equipment and think oral is icky, most women just prefer them anyway. Even most bisexual women do, because they're brainwashed through female socialization and there's less societal backlash when dating men. My ex is the only other lesbian I have ever met irl and I still have difficulty believing other lesbians exist due to the isolation. Going to events doesn't help much either, because you just find AGP's, straight Aidens and 'asexuals' who love talking about BDSM for some reason. What helped me were books like the Well of Loneliness, because it helps to know this is a tale as old as time and it's not just me. It doesn't change that I'm practically a (partially voluntary) femcel, but it's something.
No. 258569
>>258525Absolutely, I've definitely developed a fear of dating over it. It sucks to put yourself in a vulnerable position being emotionally involved with a woman when there's a chance she dumps me immediately for a Nigel. I don't have anything against dating bisexuals per se but with them you know there's a 90% chance of them treating you as a temporary solution until they find a moid to marry. I'm still haunted by the girl who said "If you were a man I'd date you" to my face years ago and it
triggered my then tranny period.
>Groomed by male dominated culture or not, it seems like women tend to crave roughness and I’m just super full of estrogen.No, I think they
do sincerely want to date you and other women but it's made too hard to stay in a same-sex relationship when thinking about the logistics of having children and dealing with homophobia around you. Some of the women pick the worst fucking low value males ever just because they want to be accepted in society's eyes.
No. 258607
>>258589discord is for peasants, queens use the bathroom wall.
>>258592she sounds like a very lucky lady
No. 258618
File: 1650817541009.gif (4.8 MB, 480x640, female-chad-female-gigachad.gi…)
>>258525>does anyone else feel kind of inferior to men?No, never.
No. 258987
>>258525I don't think men are superior. However I always wanted to be a guy. I remember being 5 and wearing suits in my room imagining I was a gentleman. 20 years later I still daydream about being a man.
But I know I will never be a man. So I prefer to look feminine.
No. 259109
>>259104Yes, and it has the stench of black and white teenage polilez bullshit. I don't have the need to cape for gay men but I don't have the need to really hate them either because I've sometimes found more solidarity with them than with straight women for example. Sure there are catty misogynistic gay men but just as much there are plenty of lesbians who aggressively cape for AGPs and LChat staceys who have a solid hate boner for any GNC woman. To me straight/bi men are the worst option but putting gay men in the same category is being dishonest in my eyes. Despite everything they don't have the same incentive to abuse and oppress women as female-attracted men do.
>especially as i feel like lesbians get viewed as being “on thin ice” just by association.Ditto. It's obvious that those anons have it out for lesbians as well and consistently try to throw sly spergfits about them, but instead of claiming them as pedo degenerates they always try to force that "why are mean goldstars always bullying me, a bihet" infight even in this thread or bitch about "ugly manlike yaoibrained pornsick TIFs" when talking about tragic butches who were pressured into transitioning. Not to mention how they clearly hate troons for their association with homosexuality, not because they're psychos appropriating LGB and female spaces.
To be perfectly honest it's why I've lost more and more interest on this site. It's exhausting when the topic seems to come up more and more and you know no matter how nonchalant they try to be about it you know there's unironic homophobia hidden behind it.
No. 259121
>>259119also i forgot to mention but she told me if she knew my parents didn’t approve of her she wouldn’t have stayed with my family in the first place. i could tell that talking to me was making her annoyed so i didn’t press this but i think if she hadn’t have met them it would have completely soured their opinion of her possibly beyond repair.
i just don’t know if telling her that what she’s experiencing now is what i’ve experienced since we first started dating. i know and have come to peace with the fact that her family will never approve of me as a partner to their daughter and i’ve extended her that grace but it’s like she can’t do the same for my family.
i don’t know. i guess i will give her space and try not to be too much of a nervous wreck
No. 259136
File: 1650991575643.jpeg (706.2 KB, 2048x1536, 1_kAJJurY91nxR1DBId6iwcQ.jpeg)
>>259119I'm not sure what's the "fuck up" here, but I see you're feeling bad about your situation and it's very hard for you. I feel like I'm getting two storylines here.
First one is that your gf is hurt that you haven't told your family about you two moving together, and that you didn't tell her about the hurtful comments your family has made about her. When it comes to the family comment, I think all you can do is say sorry and maybe reflect on why you feel responsible for managing others' feelings (I assume you didn't tell her to spare her from feeling bad). (I realize you said she doesn't want you to apologize - it's not unreasonable to ask her what other action you could take for her to feel heard, understood and feel better). I think this moment is not the time for you to defend your decisions. Yes, you may have perfectly rational explanations which you feel should make her understand - and they could make her understand, but what they won't do is undo her being hurt. Just be there for her and validate her feelings (it's ok she feels one way - and it's also ok you feel differently), and try not to take it personally. It doesn't (or shouldn't) mean that she thinks you're a bad person or a bad girlfriend. However, I hear that she set a boundary with you: she doesn't want to talk to you until you see each other in person. This sounds like a boundary that is hard for you to accept, and honestly, you should be open with her how that makes you feel, without being accusatory, and what would you prefer. Maybe not talk about the conflict yet, but still be in contact?
The second storyline are your grievances with your girlfriend. I'm hearing that you sacrificed a lot for her by coming out, and that you're disappointed her family is not accepting of you. These are very
valid feelings and are very much worth discussing, but maybe at a different time, when you two aren't both in high arousal state, maybe even trying to "one up" the other in terms of being hurt. When people argue, I think it's important to keep in mind a singular issue, otherwise the argument gets confusing and messy easily.
Basically what I'm trying to say is: most conflicts are not about the specific things that happened but more about the feelings and thoughts that they
trigger. When it comes to conflict, I like to try and use non-violent communication skills. It can be hard sometimes but also so rewarding, especially in a relationship (both person must be willing to try to use these skills though, and not fall into fallacies).
I believe you two can get past this situation, and that you can stay true to yourself while listening to the other person. Best of luck, anon.
No. 259144
>>259136thank you for this well worded response. i couldn’t sleep without getting this somewhat sorted so i sent her a message and then we had a chat about this. we’ve dated for long enough that i know she likes to do this when she’s mad - go radio silent until she feels better. that’s really hard for me to do so i’m glad she went against her own preferences to talk to me.
i do realise that a lot of what i initially posted about was me making excuses and venting so i really tried hard to listen to what she wanted to say.
as it turns out she was planning on proposing to me as soon as i arrived in her city and my more flippant comments made her think i wasn’t committed to her or something. in hindsight it seems so obvious but i honestly am still in disbelief that she loves me that much. i think it was this insecurity in myself that made me reject even hoping we’d take the next step in our relationship.
anyway i’ll spare you the details but we talked for a while and got things straightened out (lol) so to speak and i think we’re better now. it’s now nearly 4am and i think i can sleep soundly.
No. 259160
>>259142Why do we try to shut up other lesbians whenever their posts include mention of how other gays can feed into a negative view of gays in general and come back to hurt us too. Health, stigmas, social overlaps. Things that we are affected by. That's usually still relevant to the thread tbh. Being a lesbian doesn't mean pretending that men don't exist.
There's a difference between say bicurious anons shitting up the thread with 'omg I think I like a man all of a sudden, lets discuss' and what you're so upset by here. I mean anons often act like this is the relationship advice thread (which it's not) but nobody complains, we're chill.. no nitpicking.. General talk about gay community stuff though is considered a no go? How does that make sense?
No. 259169
>>259104>>259109Yep and yep. It's been happening for a little while now, which is really fucking annoying, and there's been a weird conservative bend happening at the same time. The two don't have to be related, but both viewpoints embolden the other to appear. So we get people shitting on gay moids and ftms for the completely wrong reasons under the guise of 'based troon/manhate.'
I only keep tabs on a few threads here anymore, because the blatant baiting/astroturfing that gets genuine responses and support is lame as hell.
No. 259176
File: 1651003549044.gif (964.45 KB, 500x282, PUCKENTINE4EVER.gif)
Now that we've established that Sam and Cat were a lesbian couple, which of the pair do you see yourself as in a relationship?
No. 259273
>>259160Yeah, men make up 50% of the world population and a lot of us have to deal with them on a daily basis and seeing how the lesbian experience of an interaction with a man is very different from a straight woman's it's appropriate to talk about it. I can't talk to my straight Nigeltending female friends about how I see men and their presence and have them understand me. Even my girlfriend is bi so she doesn't fully "get" me.
>>259169I wonder why it's happening tbh, sometimes it sounds like a purebred scrote or an edgy cool girl and sometimes it sounds like those domineering twitter sapphics who pretend to love women while crying into their pillow for never being able to marry Jungkook. Either way I don't trust them at all when they say they're "okay with lesbians", especially how often their masks slip off.
No. 259309
>>259110I once tried explaining the predatory lesbian issue to my friends who were lesbian, straight and bisexual respectively and only the lesbian understood what I meant. The straight and bisexual women didn't get it at all, they sincerely assumed that women could just compliment and touch each other all they wanted and never be considered rapey because that's the reality for them, not for lesbians. They didn't have to deal with being considered a rapist for existing in the same locker room growing up.
The same goes for the appeal of trooning out for GNC homosexuals, only gay people seem to fully understand the mechanics behind it. While I will always unconditionally defend women's rights and feel physically safer with a woman than a man, I still don't fully trust straight women when it comes to LGB issues. The people I see caping for trannies the most are heterosexuals, both men and women, because they don't have to deal with the full consequences.
No. 259469
Anyone struggle with what you're attracted to vs what traits you want for yourself? It's stupid because I
know you don't have to have a different dynamic for a relationship but I find the differences kinda cute. Like I find muscles and tomboy aesthetic hot but I am also into working out so would it be weird to find a gf like this as well?
>>259383You don't have fit in all her clothes nonie, if you want you two could share a couple of pieces like oversized jackets or jewelry.
No. 259485
>>259478It wouldn't be, I just think it would be nice to admire something I don't have (or vice versa) Kinda like height differences, I don't care
too much about it but it would be cute to be held by someone taller than me and she liked me for being shorter if that makes sense
No. 259957
File: 1651295160714.jpg (113.82 KB, 841x852, Im_probably_screwed.jpg)
>>258319It's not looking good. Can someone please help me on the ethics of this? I honestly don't want to die without ever having sex again, but I don't think it's fair to put another woman through that. Even if it's a one night stand, I can imagine it's still fucked up if your temporary bed partner dies not super long after. Unless they are a tourist I guess and have no way of finding out. I don't even know how I'm going to attract anyone, I lost so much weight and muscle, I look like a ghost with a slightly yellow tinge. I'm honestly even considering contacting the lesbian escort agency, I hate that my brain even went over that as an option, but what if I don't even get to have a PCHP? I keep getting more bad news after doctors say "oh it probably won't be that bad".
No. 260167
File: 1651353548025.jpg (40.04 KB, 735x429, 1651092554353.jpg)
>>259957I hope you make it nona. Don't leave us.
No. 260345
File: 1651411136171.jpg (33.61 KB, 540x521, 1561167427546.jpg)
I started to follow a smaller celebrity on social media and find her irresistibly pretty and she have a shy/akward charm and personality but is not a doormat. She very rarely post stuff or interact with fans, but commission art sometime. I was thinking about doing a drawing of her for her birthday but it's super cringe right ?
She is like the only celebrity crush I ever had who is active now and not 30+ years ago.
sage for shit blogposting
No. 260369
File: 1651414875180.jpg (500.66 KB, 1000x600, the-overrepresentation-of-butc…)
>>260277>She's an ultrafemme, lowkey disgusted by butches and GNC lesbians and doesn't know how to keep her fucking mouth shut about it, thinks she's oppressed for "not looking like a lesbian"I hate this oh my god. Fucking where? Where is this magical land where society respects butch lesbians more than conventionally feminine women? Where is this secret lesbian island where butches get all the positive media representation and femmes are reduced to punchlines? Is that where all the butches are hiding? Is that why I can't find any non-trans butch women on dating apps? Are they all living on the secret butch supremacy island?
No. 260386
File: 1651417725404.png (68.67 KB, 1080x2280, Screenshot_20220501-100151.png)
I'm trying to see how quickly I can get myself banned from Lex because that app isn't even good for shitposting. It's all deranged troons, slightly less deranged ftms, and really young she/theys who would probably be disgusted by actual sex with a woman, and almost everybody is overweight and/or fugly. My profile is blatantly TERFy without actually using the word and I still get random trannies like picrel messaging me. Maybe if I succeed here I will move on to trolling on Her but I don't want some creepy troon dev to hold onto my IP and account details.
No. 260506
File: 1651428297460.png (255.24 KB, 700x700, 1650964817920.png)
>>260277>She's an ultrafemme, lowkey disgusted by butches and GNC lesbians and doesn't know how to keep her fucking mouth shut about it, thinks she's oppressed for "not looking like a lesbian"Oh god. I can't express how much i hate those kind of woman
No. 260538
File: 1651434806107.jpg (34.58 KB, 563x514, cebd26a0615786bc24fe661900824e…)
>>260167Realistically I have a great shot due to my age and prior fitness level, but I'm just scared shitless either way due to how much I've deteriorated in just a couple months and how much seems to be affected.
>>260277>She's an ultrafemme, lowkey disgusted by butches and GNC lesbians and doesn't know how to keep her fucking mouth shut about it, thinks she's oppressed for "not looking like a lesbian">"I would date a trans woman no problem because trans women are women!"What the actual fuck.
>>260369Oh god the Lword did butches so dirty. All we got was a troon who ended up sleeping with a man and Ivan who ended up being poly and trying to get with straight women. Shane barely even counts as some form of masc and they did her dirty too. People who complain about butches, are living in the past, which they weren't even a part of. The 40's/50's were a weird time from what I've read and femme4femme was rare in working class communities for a while, but that hasn't been the case since the 70's at the very least. Ruby Rose as Stella in OINTB was thrown out real fast, the other butch Dominga "Daddy" Duarte literally went to prison for being a pimp and getting one of the women killed after pressuring her into it. She also got other women in prison on drugs. Which is worse than whatever most of the other women in prison did. Let's also not talk about Big Boo and what they made her do with the dog and why Lea Delaria has some weird hatred of other butches (idk if she's even actually butch). They consistently do butches dirty.
No. 260561
>>260517Not about to dox myself but I more or less wrote "I hate men". Considering just nuking the whole venture by making a post about JKR for the lulz.
>>260400Your guess is as good as mine. I think he means he's going to attempt some sort of fertility ritual on a chaser he's been talking to but who even knows.
No. 260578
>>260563Butch is a lesbian identity or description and refers to a (considered by general society) masculine manner of dress and behaviour. It's more than just an aesthetic or 'look'. This shouldn't be misinterpreted as "butches have to act like scrotes", which isn't the case, but a femme with short hair is a femme with short hair, not suddenly butch. I don't know how "dyke" describes a look? Tomboy can refer to women of any sexuality, usually children, implies that it's something you grow out of, usually not seen as masculine as "butch". Often used by people who believe that "butch" is a dirty word and they think it refers to fat ugly women who don't know how to dress well; it feels like a cowardly copout. People who call everyone who wears a suit or has short hair "butch" are retarded too and should stfu, because that's not how it works.
>>260565Stud refers to black butches specifically, it doesn't mean "classy butches". Butches can be classy too.
No. 260667
File: 1651488384110.jpg (155.55 KB, 1280x720, maxresdefault.jpg)
>>260538>Oh god the Lword did butches so dirty. Have you seen any of the reboot yet? They made Shane fall in love with an AGP. Finley is cute though so I'm still watching.
No. 260837
File: 1651545650764.png (38.76 KB, 1001x303, sure.png)
Pride month is one month away. Have you anons prepared your nuclear bunkers yet?
No. 260937
>>260723Shane fell super hard unfortunately. They also added one true butch to the series but she's old and annoying and kind of an idiot. The L Word only "improved" in terms of shoving even more trannies into storylines.
>>260634You need to work on trust first. Don't set up expectations of sex (or later, orgasm) from touches and just focus on going as far as you can handle. Talk to each other, a lot. She will need reassurance and feel bad for it, so will you. But looking in her eyes you'll find reassuring her comes easy, and she will feel the same. Imo stop escalating as soon as one of you starts getting in her head and learn to communicate that effectively. Sometimes you will misread or fail to speak up but you need to be patient and focus on feeling safe. Just support each other and slowly explore intimate interactions that feel good and safe. Trust comes first, there is no special technique that will make sex easy.
No. 261076
File: 1651619316042.png (80.44 KB, 750x600, image0.png)
>>260386lex has banned my burner accounts 20+ times. i dont care. i spammed their servers w accounts and set location to coordinate in antartica.
No. 261122
File: 1651639794550.jpeg (61.35 KB, 800x420, f5093fa0-3037-11ea-ba66-81d7bf…)
>>260937They made her go from Quiara to an AGP? While I hate that Quiara constantly pressured Shane into having kids together, when it's been clear Shane is extremely terrified of that, at least she was an actual woman and quite hot.
No. 261308
File: 1651704347647.gif (1.03 MB, 400x225, e69348abf15f009cedf763c8b44404…)
>>261170The writing was on the wall already tbh from the beginning (gif related), but I hate they went that route anyway. I think Ilene Chaiken hates any kind of gnc or slightly masc lesbian and has made it her lifegoal to give the shittiest representation ever.
>>261290I'm sorry for reminding you, kek. Thank you! I had another test procedure done today, they've taken some biopsies and the waiting game is starting again. I think they want to do a Whipple procedure, but are still looking at how much to remove. I hoped to get away with a simple resection, but of course not kek
No. 261311
File: 1651704763534.jpg (62.02 KB, 564x564, 6c407da06e44b0ff9f2c8269d7f166…)
>>261290Also I'm glad the person you're caring for is doing better now! She's lucky to have someone like you caring for her and I hope things get only better!
No. 261375
>>261370Thanks
nonnie, you are right. Do you listen to any podcasts from non handmaiden lesbians? Any nonas have any suggestions?
No. 261479
>>261472Got it from my grandma, it's a cheaper 80's office lady ensemble but this time I had to swap out the skirt for a custom made formal pant (no ready to wear pant will ever fit me well). Honestly I'm lucky because the vest stop at my waist, and the jacket is curvy enought for my hips. Honestly a 3 piece suit off the rack can't really work for any woman who is not build like a runaway model. Appart from this jacket, the only that fit me is one I did with a custom pattern.
>>261474True! There really need to be some kind of revival in butch fashion that is not just man sportwear or skater boy stuff thrown on a woman.
No. 261687
>>261683I wouldn’t worry about it. Online dating if full of tims, gender specials and handmaidens anyway. Oh and spicy straights looking for threesomes
>>261684i feel you. i want a gnc
terf gf to be cat mum with.
No. 261861
File: 1651902342107.jpg (50.91 KB, 800x533, 384764674 5.jpg)
How do you deal with family member's passing by homophobia? Not even always directed towards you. My mom is generally an accepting person (I'm not really out to her but hinted at it and suspect she knows) but every so often will make jokes or remarks about lesbians and it kind of stings every time. Like she's pretty traditional so when she saw Jojo siwa dancing with another woman on Dancing with the Stars and said she thought it was 'unnatural' for the competition because all the other contestants were man/woman. She also believes strongly that kids should have a mother and father, not two mothers or fathers and doesn't think they could be raised right. I've never told her that if I ever wanted kids it'd be with another woman, it somehow makes me feel like I'd be an incompetent parent if I ever did want kids one day. I have other family members make fun of lesbians' sex preferences which always makes me wince like heterosexuals don't do disgusting things too?? Idk I just feel embarrassed everytime it's brought up like I'm the butt of the joke
No. 261923
>>261861i used to think i wouldn’t invite them to my wedding but i’m just going to elope lmao
i moved away from my family and only keep in touch by calls. i never share more than i need to.
No. 262057
>>262038What color do you want to dye it? Unless you get it cut weird most normies won't suspect you're trying to be gendery, a lot of straight girls I see have colorfully dyed hair nowadays.
I think makeup and clothes affect this though, I wore and oversized jacket and colored lipstick together once and someone had to confirm my pronouns were female
kms No. 262186
>>262057ayrt. like a slicked back mohawk? sides are shaved in tight. and the kicker is my fav colours are green, blue (the danger hair colours) or purple.
I’m so ducking angry for you nonna. how is it lesbians have been gnc for literal centuries but it’s only of note when it’s done by non-binary/tif kids. If i wear green lipstick i don't want to be they/them’ed. I want to look like Jolyne Jostar.
No. 262222
>>262186god it was green lipstick. I don't want to hate the color now either because I
[thought] it looked cool
No. 262278
File: 1651971239928.jpeg (328.68 KB, 2048x1915, FRR9lwbXwAA3DEy.jpeg)
We need more lesbos
No. 262315
>>262286There's nothing wrong with single moms. I've seen masculine guys who were closeted from both their parents. Men act hyper-masculine to hide their desires away, these are the same men who compare dick sizes and talk about them more than us, and they decide to talk shit about us. Pakistan where being gay is haram, they watch alot of gay porn. this
triggers me. Men place women in different hierarchies when we do more or equal
No. 262339
>>262038I'm embarrassed of my nickname now because I worry it makes me look like a gendie but I also haven't gone by my birth name in five years kek. Just do it anon, people will always make assumptions about you. And you're right,
>>262186 lesbians have always been gnc. We're the blueprint, they're copying
us. So don't let them take your self expression just because you're embarrassed you might be associated with them. We do it better lol
No. 262343
Internalized lesbophobia and somewhat explicit What is the actual difference between attraction and objectification? How many women are you allowed to be attracted to before it gets gross and a cliché? Is it bad to not have a type, but have very broad interest, from high femme to even SOME TiFs, various bodytypes? Is it objectification and degrading if you want to go down on a woman, but wouldn't want them to go down on you (I'm not completely touch-me-not, just a weird hangup)? I don't want to transition, but I also don't want to perform femininity because it makes me feel like an AGP and look like one (imo). Dressing gnc makes me feel like I actually look like a woman, because the contrast brings out my feminine features. Meanwhile if I do anything feminine, I feel like my ogre bonestructure comes right out. Same thing with short hair, I actually think my face looks more feminine and soft with short hair and less harsh and sharp than with long hair. Is not wanting to perform femininity internalized misogyny? I feel like a gross hypersexual scrote who is just larping as a feminist. How can I shit on scrotes, when I'm basically seen as scrotelite anyway and I have a very high libido? I never use misogynist cuss words iirc, I don't comment on women's bodies irl or even online really, except something vague like "oh she's beautiful". I would never talk about "owning" someone and I'm not a jealous type afaik. I don't watch porn, I've never been interested in actual porn, there's enough mainstream media which is already borderline softcore. I'd be fine with a completely monogamous exclusive relationship, but I think my sex drive is too high for that and it would've been better if I were asexual, because who the fuck would want a gross horny simp around all the time? If I were actually attractive, I would totally want to be some sort of stripper for women exclusively or even an escort (I saw something about a lesbian escort bureau on the news) and I feel like a scrote over it. I wish I could nuke my libido and become asexual. I almost feel like the polilez are right and it's better to be a cottagecore asexual, because it's hard to marry feminism and my scroteishness.
No. 262362
File: 1652003573985.jpeg (65.17 KB, 1200x600, 989.jpeg)
>>262343>because it's hard to marry feminism and my scroteishness.Maybe you need to step back from feminism a bit? I read your whole vent and I've had most of those feelings too. When I spend too much time thinking about radical feminism (and especially if I'm participating in radfem communities full of straight women) I end up with this weird OCD about my sexuality where I obsess over rooting out the '
problematic' parts. It's not healthy.
I don't think you sound like a scrote at all. I think you sound like a normal lesbian. Thought crime isn't actually a thing you know? You're never going to be scrotelike just for being attracted to women. Men are disgusting because they turn their thoughts into shitty IRL behavior like leering and harassing. And then patriarchy enables that shitty IRL behavior and makes it worse. It's not even comparable to you like, seeing a woman and privately wishing you could go down on her.
I'm so sorry you feel this way. I wish I could type more but I'm stoned and barely functional, I just wanted to make sure someone replied. I wish I could give you a hug.
No. 262366
>>262362I think I've internalized it on top of the religious conservative and TRA stuff. I had supposed other lesbians in radfem spaces send me links to polilez articles, it all honestly sounds very similar and has blended together. I've left all radfem online communities quite a while ago and I try to avoid general lesbian communities too, because that is either filled with TRA's or more conservative types who think
butches give lesbians a bad name and should
transition already. I feel like because of the
gnc/butch thing I have a bigger responsibility to root out the
problematic parts, because
we have such a bad reputation already. So now every time I realize I feel attracted to a woman, my mind immediately goes down the list of how I'm a fucked up gross predatory monster and I probably traumatized her with my presence, I'm being a bit hyperbolic, but it does feel that way. I know realistically speaking thought crime isn't a thing, but I remember that back in the day there was discourse about how it feels like thought rape if someone does have private thoughts like that and that it's fucked up and objectifying either way. What even is the difference between leering, staring and just looking? I try to glue my eyes to the floor or ceiling, but then I catch myself looking anyway and sometimes I think I do stare because I'm trying to get my gaydar to work and wonder whether it's just a straight woman with a spicy haircut or maybe a lesbian too. Sometimes I've complimented other women on their arms or hair and maybe that's harassment? I usually try to get away as soon as possible afterwards
I probably look like a tard running away so I don't make anyone uncomfortable, but maybe it feels threatening and predatory anyway when it comes from someone like me. Your stoned thoughts were very coherent and I do appreciate you taking the time to type all of that out. Thank you.
No. 262398
>>262380I never wanted to transition really. When a fujo ex-friend transitioned when we were teenagers, I reacted really extreme to it, so it's never been an option to me. Though it doesn't matter, because people have always compared me to men anyway and everyone from christians to TRA's think I should've been a man,
conservative lesbians would prefer if I'd transition, so I wouldn't give the community a bad name and add to the stereotype of the "mannish" lesbian. I don't necessarily take all of society's bigger problems on myself, but I'm worried that my existence makes other women uncomfortable and that's the last thing I would want. I've not really met another lesbian since my ex (and I dumped her to save her from my horrible monstrous predatory ass, but she turned out to actually be into women), even when going to progressive spaces. Actual bi women seem rare too. This is going to sound insane, but
it makes me sometimes doubt whether others even exist. I see it online, there are some tv shows and movies, a book here and there, women on dating apps who only want to chat, but irl there's nobody. Straight women seem so unbothered, they hug each other, give each other compliments, stare at each other all they want and it's fine. Meanwhile I haven't shared changingrooms with other women since late primary school. The mind might be a lonely place, but irl is not much different in my experience. I'm not even sure whether those "other people" exist. I've come across gay men in passing, but never chatted for longer than 15 minutes. The guy who I knew for a decade and who I thought was gay, ended up being bi, so I'm completely ignorant.
No. 262408
File: 1652023710278.jpg (58.32 KB, 610x1024, 9154a41dd19ac517827c781c684483…)
This is such a retarded question but would this still be considered somewhat femme or just tomboyish?
No. 262484
>>262343>Is not wanting to perform femininity internalized misogyny?Even if a fear of femininity in presentation does come from a place of internalized misogyny, I think a lot of women are simply afraid of experiencing misogyny from other people because of the way they look, which imo makes it completely fine to want to avoid it. Feminists before us fought for the right for women to have more freefom over their bodies, clothes included. Also, if anything, I think being gnc is very beautiful and admirable. I'm very femme myself and sometimes I do wonder if I dress how I do because I've been brainwashed by society, and I admire women who don't try to fit into that mold and just do what looks best to them.
>I don't watch porn, I've never been interested in actual pornI actually did/do suffer from porn addiction and it really just worsens everything. I've always loved and admired other women and their bodies and absolutely hate even getting compliments from men, but it makes me feel just as bad as any man when I would objectify porn actresses or just fantasize about having consensual vanilla sex with other women. I hate being objectified myself but I also am terrified of objectifying other women even though I don't think my own thoughts would be disgusting if another woman thought of me that way. It's just an all around upsetting and confusing experience sometimes, but there are definitely other lesbians who have high libidos, I hope you can find someone who would be happy to be with you. No. 262486
>>262484Samefagging to add, not wanting to perform femininity is not misogynistic. The imposed restrictions and standards of femininity as dictated by men is what's misogynistic, and wanting to exist as your natural self in comfortable clothes with an easy to maintain haircut is definitely not misogynistic in the least. If some women want to perform femininity, that's fine, but femininity is not synonymous with womanhood, it is something that's
expected of us.
Anon, I recognize a lot of myself in what you're saying and I can tell you carry a lot of guilt and shame. Please trust your heart and body. None of what you're describing is wrong, it's only homophobes that have a problem with what you're saying. Being able to self describe this as internalized lesbophobia is the first step towards healing. There's nothing wrong with you at all.
No. 262487
>>262343Fuck, sorry, samefagging one last time.
I am also a horny simp. I have a wife who I love and I could cum just from eating her out. When we first got together we were having sex like three times a day. I am foolishly over the top in love with her, and before we met I also had thoughts of wanting to strip for women, serve them, be used by them. Now that I'm in a stable, loving relationship I no longer feel like a desperate horny little freak because I've learned that mutual attraction actually exists and it's not just me acting like an incel. We've both had past sexual trauma that can make things hard for us but we're understanding of each other and we make each other feel safe.
Other lesbians exist and they're horny for you as well, I promise it's a fact. It's going to get better. Please don't be afraid to put yourself out there because I guarantee you will feel so much better meeting other women like you. Nothing has helped me like finding community with proud, established, gnc lesbians. Just keep looking until you find them, whether online or irl.
No. 262506
>>262485>>262486>Radfem lesbians are great>radfem lesbians are good for the soulNona, all I've gotten from radfem "lesbians" are polilez articles and constant shaming. There's an approved gnc uniform, but anything more gnc or overtly masculine than just being lazy, is seen as male aligned. You're also still expected to perform some femininity to fit the uniform and there is a list of approved behaviors that comes with the uniform. Handing a tissue to a femme or opening the door? You're upholding heteropatriarchy, infantilizing her and oppressing yourself! Getting sent Bev Jo articles and podcasts, where she talks about how anyone can choose to become a "Lesbian" and having her kiss Terri Strange's ass. You can have a sex drive, maybe once a month, but you HAVE to let
other women go down on you or you're basically a
trans man already! If you're attracted to overt femmes? You're practically a scrote, that's male gazey, go think about what you've done! Attracted to TiF's? Straight to the gulag with you! You can only find other enlightened radfem "Lesbians", woman-identified-women attractive and whether it's a butch or a femme, they uphold heteropatriarchy and aren't true woman-identified-women. Also if you're not an open
terf everywhere, you're not even a true "Lesbian" don't you know?! Nah I don't think I can be around radfem "Lesbians" (you have to capitalize the l don't you know? To signify how you're better and different from those "lifelongs" who didn't CHOOSE to be a Lesbian!!). They even tried to pressure my bi friend into identifying as a lesbian, because if you know you're bi, you must be a disgusting slut who is open to men, you have to call yourself a lesbian to signify you're not open to men! Can't just call yourself febfem! I swear straight radfems are more sane than them and any actual non-polilez lesbians run away very fast and don't last long in such an environment.
>>262487>Please don't be afraid to put yourself out there because I guarantee you will feel so much better meeting other women like you. Well radfem Lesbians aren't like me, because I didn't choose any of this and I don't want even more pressure to hyperanalyze everything I do. I'm glad you found happiness and all that, but those radfem communities are a minefield. I'll have to look in other places which aren't explicitly radfem.
>>262484>and sometimes I do wonder if I dress how I do because I've been brainwashed by societyHumans have been painting their faces and decorating themselves since the very beginning. I think even if we were on a planet with just women or with no patriarchy or whatever, you'd still have women who would dress in what we consider now feminine. Crows like shiny things, humans can like shiny things too and put it on themselves.
I hope you'll recover and will no longer feel shame from it. I lucked out, but it's difficult to avoid porn in today's society™ and even mainstream media seems to be full of borderline softcore stuff. it's not your fault!
>I hope you can find someone who would be happy to be with you.I feel like I'm too late, I don't know how long I have left, whether I can even recover and I'm probably spending the rest of my 20's in treatment and what if I need chemo and it'll wreck me even more? I'm already not very attractive, have low confidence and a femcel attitude, so I've kinda resigned myself to the fact that I'm probably going to stay alone. I don't even want to go on dating apps anymore, I'm gross skinnyfat and look like a junkie teenage boy since I lost weight, full of bruises and a sickly skintone. I feel guilty anyway for not having my priorities straight. Why is this the thing that bothers me when there's so much other shit about life I'll be missing out on? It makes me wonder if I deserved this, for being this messed up. Like karma for being a coomer. No. 262678
>>262506What you wrote about radfem "lesbians" is so spot on. I actually came out feeling
worse about my sexuality after spending a few months on the radfem scene. I remember talking about extravagant fashion purchases with one woman and I mentioned getting expensive designer boxers as a treat and she flipped the fuck out on me telling me I'm gonna troon out and I'm a misogynist for preferring male styles of underwear. Absolutely batshit insane and that's the tip of the iceberg for the mad shit I heard from these women. I agree with a great deal of their politics but you could not pay me to hang out with radfems again. I don't even want to label myself a radfem or radfem adjacent, lest I attract more polilez freaks.
No. 262754
>>262734Finding radfems who larp as lesbians is easier than finding actual lesbians somehow. I even went to a party in a progressive area a couple months ago and the only technically lesbian women I saw, were TiFs with a beard and everything. Every androgynous woman I came across was a straight Aiden and thought I was one too for just being a babyface butch. The only person I came across who was actually into women, claimed to be asexual, while also talking about going down on women and playing choking games with her friends. Though I don't know if she meant an actual woman or an AGP, because she was sitting next to one. I feel so fucking out of touch, they were older than me, practically millennials, but they were acting more like zoomers than me the zoomer. I feel like a fucking boomer in comparison. A gay guy took pity on me and was the only one who actually recognized me as a normal butch woman. I think I maybe saw one butch4butch couple leave early on from the corner of my eye. Why is it so fucking difficult to find other lesbians? They're not with the radfems, not with the queer TRA's, I feel like everyone is already coupled up and hiding in their bunker in pure bliss.
>>262678They also freak out if you want to read about lesbian history, because they are deadset on the narrative that true lesbians didn't exist before them and that they invented being gnc. Sharing fucked up articles with a religious undertone
some polilez writers were theologians, there's a reason polilez lesbophobia is similar to what religious nutjobs preach is fine, but please don't read about female masculinity or lesbian history, because that is icky!! Their politics are fine on the surface, but for some reason they want to control the tiniest details because of the "personal is political" thing, everything is under a catholic-guilt-like scrutiny. It's how you just know they're not really lesbians, because if they were, they'd know that we are already hard enough on ourselves and don't need even more of that shit, we already got enough shit from religious conservatives and all sorts of lesbophobes screeching about how we're wannabe men over a clothing item.
No. 262841
>>262506I'm sorry my suggestion wasn't helpful anon, I didn't mean to bring back any bad memories for you. I've never had this experience before honestly, the radfem lesbians and bi women I know are really nice understanding people and are strongly critical of the type of behavior you describe. Maybe I was wrong to suggest seeking out a certain group, I more meant to look for other women who are proud of their sexuality, who value and center other women and their autonomy. I hope things get better for you. We don't deserve the harsh scrutiny we receive.
>>262754>>262833I'd never heard of them before this thread, is this like a new tier of separatism? "Choosing" to be a lesbian because you hate men? Why not just be celibate, I don't understand this.
>>262733Fuck that.
No. 262854
>>262833I hate that sexuality is tied to political identity, ffs. I don't like associating with the lgb community sometimes because it's so tied to other politics. I get that it had to be in order to have like marriage rights and to not be killed in the streets, but making it revolve around every othe aspect of your life is crazy.
I live my life in the closet mainly because of this and never bring up my sexuality unless its relevant because I don't view it as my whole personality, literally just as who I want my partner to be.
No. 262866
File: 1652207756555.jpg (981.27 KB, 2218x1590, polilez_collage.jpg)
>>262841Sheila Jeffreys, Julie Bindel, Andrea Dworkin, Mary Daly etc. are political lesbians.
>Political lesbianism originated in the late 1960s among second wave radical feminists as a way to fight sexism and compulsory heterosexuality. Sheila Jeffreys helped to develop the concept when she co-wrote in 1981 "Love Your Enemy? The Debate Between Heterosexual Feminism and Political Lesbianism"[3] with the Leeds Revolutionary Feminist Group. They argued that women should abandon support of heterosexuality and stop sleeping with men, while encouraging women to rid men "from your beds and your heads".[4] While the main idea of political lesbianism is to be separate from men, this does not necessarily mean that political lesbians have to sleep with women; some choose to be celibate or identify as asexual. The Leeds Revolutionary Feminist Group definition of a political lesbian is "a woman identified woman who does not fuck men". They proclaimed men the enemy and women who were in relationships with them collaborators and complicit in their own oppression. Heterosexual behavior is seen as the basic unit of the patriarchy's political structure, lesbians who reject heterosexual behavior therefore disrupt the established political system.[5]Many of them never slept with women or even dated women, but still claimed to be lesbians, like Dworkin (love a lot of her writings, but she was a polilez). The ideal lesbian to them doesn't sleep with women, but just has a friendship and does some handholding once a month. It's also btw why Julie Bindel tried to convince JK Rowling during that lunch that she could choose to be a lesbian. That sadly enough wasn't a joke. It's not a "new" tier of separatism, is the original kind. "Lesbian feminist" is generally code for polilez and "Lesbian feminist" theory is ironically enough vehemently lesbophobic. A lot of radfem "lesbians" aren't actually lesbians, but people don't notice that when they just reblog memes and some fun quotes, but never read where those came from. Picrel some online polilez retardation, sorry for the shitty collage.
>>262833A polilez as a partner sounds like actual hell, being constantly shamed for your sexuality and actually being attracted to your partner.
No. 262874
File: 1652208691107.jpg (143.67 KB, 1313x526, kek.jpg)
>>262870Yeah she did claim she's a lesbian and she also sperged out at a lesbian conference for actual lesbians, called them nazi's for not accepting her as a lesbian iirc
No. 262898
>>262866>>262874Awful, I hate seeing this. Thank you for the write up and collage, and taking the time to explain this to me. I had no idea this was going on. Blogging a little but it's been very difficult to come out of an extremely sheltered Christian upbringing (literally was not allowed to go to school) and land in the laps of various groups who don't have my best interests in mind, and then find out there's even more layers of this shittiness. Every day it feels like there's a new way to deny that same sex attraction exists and is unchangeable and degrade people for it.
I'm very disappointed to hear this about Dworkin in particular. I started reading her work recently, she was saying a lot of what I was feeling and that was comforting. I still think what she had to say has value, but still. Very disappointing. Again, why can't they just call themselves celibate or asexual?
No. 262903
>>262898AYRT, yeah same with the sheltered upbringing. I went to a school where parents had to sign a declaration promising that their kids aren't gay kek. Everywhere I turn I run into a wall of lesbophobia. A lot of Dworkin's work is still good and valuable though, don't have to throw everything in the trash. Just a thing to keep in mind. Some of the other writers I mentioned though, really did only write polilez bs and nothing useful. Polilez feel like they are the true lesbians and "lifelong born this ways" still uphold patriarchy, so aren't true lesbians in their opinion, which is why they won't drop the act and just say they're celibate.
>>262893It's not embarrassing to not have dated yet, I feel like it's common when you're SSA that it can take quite a while. I've had one relationship in my teens and I feel just as inexperienced as ever. Idk if lesbian bars and clubs even still have actual lesbians or any women who are actually attracted to women. So you might not be missing much. You could try dating apps, but I've not had much luck with that either. I might just be ugly and uninteresting kek, but many just want to chat and never meet up.
No. 263093
>>263000I was afraid of the same thing but was pleasantly surprised to see that the main character explicitly calls herself a lesbian several times. While there is queer/gender bs, it's not too bad
one character is a T-voiced themlet and the ex of one of the love interests, but she's just a side character. There isn't much other than that. I wasn't a big fan of the movie however. Most of the jokes didn't land. The plot is kinda meh. It has weird pacing, it starts off slow then shit happens too fast at the end, which I guess is typical of a romcom. There's also a weird focus on a very PDA straight couple who are the MC's best friends and they're constantly shown fully making out. It was really jarring and kinda nasty imo.
It's cute and watchable enough for a romcom, but you shouldn't expect much from it
No. 263180
>>262754>I feel like everyone is already coupled up and hiding in their bunker in pure bliss.That's literally every actually non-trooned out lesbian that I know personally. They're with their long-term girlfriend away from everyone else, never wanting to interact with any other gay person outside of their bubble because why the fuck would you in this time and age of kweer brainrot.
>>262866>>262833>>262886Hundred percent agreed on all of these posts, polilezzies can go fuck themselves. They only muddy the waters and make it miserable for all genuine lesbians. The amount of bitter hatred they have for specifically butch lesbians and depressed Aidens is both heartbreaking and enraging.
>>263168I doubt they ever said they were lesbian, most of them are just heterosexuals who claim to be "fine with female homosexuals" only because it's easier for them to dismiss and ignore due to like you described, lesbians not being taken seriously by anyone. One of them even has had several spergouts tinfoiling how a HSTS will seduce/has seduced her Nigel so she definitely has a chip on her shoulder.
No. 263268
>>263168Even if I don't feel personally offended at the homophobia towards gay men, it still worries me because in the end we're all the same to (religious) conservatives. You're either seen as predatory, asozial or as a brainwashed
victim in need of reeducation, no matter whether you're a lesbian or gay man. Yeah sure, there are gay men who hate lesbians or are vindictive, but there are also enough straight women who hate lesbians and are vindictive, so not a great argument. Why do they even care about what homosexual men do in the bedroom? It literally doesn't affect anyone. Whatever is annoying about gay men is because they're men, not because they're gay, but homophobechans are somehow convinced that the gay part makes everything worse.
>>263180I get why they hide in their bunkers, but not all of us are coupled up and some of us could use some sane friends!
No. 263281
>>263180at least one of those posters said that they were a lesbian in the tranny thread
>>263180sorry but i find it kinda funny how people keep saying that polilezzies feel this big hatred towards butches when what i have seen they constantly have displayed this performative and fake love for butch women and their path to lesbianism many times seemed to involve shaving their heads etc like where do you see this butch hatred
No. 263287
>>263281though i'd like to add that these same women did always insult transmascs though so like i said, their love for butches always was performative but maybe it's just some tumblr radfem circles where these women would flip out at other tumblr radfems mentioning wearing make up and other stuff kek so while their love for female masculinity didn't come from a sincere place they didn't show love towards feminine women either? though i guess they only loved female masculinity when it comes to outer appearance but when it comes to behavior they always acted like real proper women are meek, non confrontational, behaved (in stereotypical) feminine ways while (stereotypically) masculine behavior was demonized like women in their heads couldn't show sexual desire because that is manlike, or women couldn't be aggressive because that means they are fake women or moidish for example because women are always meek, nurturing and good?
like there were these weird rules of behaviors like female masculinity is ok when it comes to clothes and hair but femininity is approved when it comes to behavior
No. 263290
>>263268Yeah it's quite obvious they're not hating gay men because they're misogynistic but specifically because they're homosexual, especially when they suggest they're "worse than straight men" which makes them definitely sound like larping, homophobic scrotes. I remember when my old LGB friend group involved an archetypal misogynist gay twink with pussy envy snapping at women and while it was annoying as fuck and I even slapped him once for it I would much, much rather deal with that shit than a straight incel. At least he wouldn't rape or sexually assault me and straight men don't back him up so we're on almost equal grounds, and I can somewhat understand his trauma while straight men become spree killers for not having a bangmaid. And besides, like mentioned, letting any kind of homophobia be normalized directly affects lesbians as well.
>>263281>>263287It's been discussed a number of times in this thread. Just go to any polilez-infested place and you see people either calling butches ugly and disgusting (like Lchat) or being more discreet about it (like Ovarit) in the fashion of treating them as gender traitors. At the same time those people go against the trans rhetoric by claiming that people should be comfortable not performing traditional gender roles but then lowkey shame butch lesbians while treating them as male lite and potential rapists. The worst I've heard some anon mention was doormat butches on Ovarit saying that they'd
never touch or harass women in the female bathrooms unlike male troons. Like what the fuck kind of feminist space conditions you to say something like that?
No. 263291
File: 1652351536557.jpg (868.59 KB, 2452x1158, Butch_Femme_hate.jpg)
>>263281On the surface they pretend to care about butches and they might even call themselves butch, but there's more to being butch than having short hair and dressing in a lazy way. Polilez have a gender neutral uniform, but they disavow female masculinity and still skew more towards femininity. Whatever the fuck Terri Strange or Sheila Jeffreys wears cannot possibly be considered masculine. The moment you actually want to look handsome or dapper, get a proper haircut, you get shit for it. You're not allowed to be chivalrous and you're not allowed to date femmes or be attracted to them. They can't decide whether the femme or the butch is the
victim in that situation even. Sometimes they assume the butch is exactly like a male chauvinist, other times they assume the femme is oppressing the butch and isn't a real lesbian. It's also a form of classism, polilez are generally (upper)middleclass bihet women, an actual butch is horrifying to them due to the working class connotations. They can't even pretend it's just about the butch-femme coupling, which they think is heteropatriarchal, because if two dapper butches would be dating and being chivalrous to each other and dressing up for each other, that's just as bad to them. Because don't you know, we're all supposed to be sexless or else we're exactly like men?! Even suggesting you're actually attracted to your partner and you're trying to look nice for them in any way shape or form, is just too much!
>>263287Oh yeah the hatred towards lesbians who wear make-up and skirts is a lot more overt, but that's because they're not afraid of pushing you to transition. They won't admit it, but I think polilez definitely played a hand in butches not feeling welcome in the lesbian community nor within feminism. They encouraged the isolation of butches at a critical time when the medical industry first started preying on butches and trying to push for transition. Now polilez are acting like a cult, constantly screeching that they are a safe space for butches, having their minions all over claim that butch women are on their side, when they're actually extremely lesbophobic and butchphobic. I feel like they even ruined the reputation of butches, because I've seen F4F lesbians complain that butches are against their preferences and presentation, when it are the polilez who hate femmes. You're right, ironically enough they seem to love female socialization when it comes to behavior, a strong assertive woman scares them, no matter what you look like. Or the only strong assertive woman is allowed to be their ring leader and the rest has to bow down to them.
>>263290>The worst I've heard some anon mention was doormat butches on Ovarit saying that they'd never touch or harass women in the female bathrooms unlike male troons. Like what the fuck kind of feminist space conditions you to say something like that?I've even seen some say that they don't mind conservative lesbophobes harassing them in the bathroom, as long as it keeps the TiMs out. Since when do TiMs look like butches? Also if they still try to kick you out after hearing your voice and everything, they're not uwu concerned radfems, they're lesbophobes.
No. 263304
>>263290>lchat>polilez placeLMAO what? what lchat have you been to, from what i remember they surely don't identify as feminists and aren't big on politics, they're just bunch of high femmes who hate everyone who isn't a skinny high femme if they're not moids larping. they invented the word bislut for fuck's sake what polilez uses that kind of word and they have no tolerance for non-goldstars at all, again, what polilez is like that
like lchat is bitchy and butch hating as fuck but calling them polilezzies??
No. 263308
>>263306i always thought political lesbians were the kind of women who choose to be lesbian and simp for bisexuals and women who have sex with men and call themselves lesbians
like on lchat they used to have long threads about tumblr queers and calling them polilezzies, now lchatters are polilezzies, polilezzies are everywhere and i have no idea anymore who they are supposed to be
No. 263310
File: 1652359581154.png (717.6 KB, 1203x933, terf-gender-uniform.png)
doubleposting, honestly i am just rambling here like i don't disagree with you guys i know what you mean. i also used to feel bad for being attracted to more feminine women like i am some scroteish predator or that i just have a moid taste because i like femmes or whatever.
at the same time though i felt like i am supposedly giving in to the patriarchy because i care what i look like, like yeah it felt like that unless you dress like hoboish slovenly middle aged woman like sheila jeffreys you are falling to the traps of femininity or something. i am not butch or femme the way i dress really varies a lot but when i dress more masc i want to wear nice shoes and nicely fitting clothes. though it is kinda impossible for me to look properly butch anyway, my body and face is too feminine and i end up always looking femme if i am not wearing frumpy baggy clothes and then i just look like an old auntie playing dress up. i'm just bitter i don't have more androgynous look
No. 263323
>>263308Polilez hate proud bi women. Febfem and not sleeping with men isn't good enough for them, they want bi women to larp as lesbian. They think calling yourself bi is a political statement which indicates you're available to men. They only like bi women who are polilez and call themselves lesbian. Majority of Lchat always came across as more conservative assimilationist, they think butches give lesbians a bad name and want us to transition so lesbians aren't being associated with being butch/masc anymore. They act like we're all that's standing in between societal acceptance. They also think butch=fat and if you're skinny you must be a tomboy kek, lots of coping. There are some polilez, bis and rf's on there, but it's not the majority afaik. They're absolutely insane on Lchat thinking Ruby Rose looked better in dresses and long hair btw.
>>263310I'm sometimes jealous I'm not curvy or petite kek. We all got stuff that works for us or doesn't.
No. 263332
File: 1652370406662.jpg (Spoiler Image,26.53 KB, 306x409, 11254400-6832983-image-m-25_15…)
>>263310Anon wear what you want, as for that picture there are plenty of more feminine famous terves as well. I know she is straight but just look at Posie Parker.
>>263323>Polilez hate proud bi women. Febfem and not sleeping with men isn't good enough for them, they want bi women to larp as lesbian.This reminds me of Julie Bindel, I like her work but she once wrote an article about how she thinks bisexuals don't exist. I guess she is in denial of her own feeelings. Sad.
No. 263343
File: 1652372166345.jpg (55.07 KB, 564x780, 199ac8b718277e62da2c0da3ce5227…)
>>263341>>263339KD Lang would already be too much for them. Omg a suit! Coordination, she thought about her outfit for longer than 2 seconds! Way too, dapper, off to the gulag!
No. 263513
>>263317hm i don't fully agree because plenty of l chatters sperg to death about how butches are man wannabes upholding unequal patriarchal gender roles to oppress "normal" feminine women like scrotes do, the femme4femmes there base their sexuality on being pure from anything that reminds them of men which is basically everything (their focus on men when talking about lesbian relationships is obsessive like a polilez) and they write essays bashing butches because "butches make lesbians look bad". that's political
i've even seen some start to bash femmes and say being feminine is just so normal it doesn't need its own word and femme was invented by butches. they think polilez only means bashing femmes for wearing makeup but they do the same thing to butches for not wearing it because it "aligns them with men"
No. 263517
>>263504>I see lesbians get told they're acting like gay men for using the labels and I don't think that's fair.I seriously think that's a part of the obsession with desexualizing lesbians, even in straight relationship people have varying preferences with sexual behaviour. Leaning towards being more dominant or submissive isn't some BDSM degeneracy, it's just how things tend to be and I hate how some people act as if everyone sexually healthy is just a strict 50/50 when that's never the case.
>>263511>They also think that it's a roundabout way of butch-femme, at least how they view butch-femme.Agree. My girlfriend is femme and definitely the more dominant one than I am as a butch, and it's clear it's them projecting their manhate (or more precisely in their case, hatred of masculinity) to butches once again. Butches are evil, violent, oppressive rapist male lites to them and they treat lesbianism as some fun girl club filling whatever emotional hole they're trying to patch up.
>>263513This.
No. 263544
File: 1652446246922.jpg (51.58 KB, 608x294, wewdasq.jpg)
>>263529gay men have always called themselves gold star, there is an old joke that gay men who were born through caesarean section are platinum star because they're never touched a pussy in their entire lives
does anyone even have source for the tumblr claim that goldstar started as an insult, i only ever have seen whiny tumblr types to talk about it
pic related, some of you might not have even been born yet when this was added
No. 263564
>>263554>one woman acts out what we think a man isYou can't possibly say that, you know what men are like, right? They would never be as caring and chivalrous as a butch, they will never be able to empathize with another woman like a butch, they will never be able to pull off masculinity like a butch. Men rape, abuse, neg, expect their girlfriends to cook for them and do everything for them, won't wash their own asses, don't listen to their girlfriends and won't go down on them. Why the ever loving fuck would we ever want to act that out? You have no idea how fucked up it is what you just said and how misogynistic it truly is what you just said. Butches have a sensitive soft side a man would never have, not the way a woman has. If you want butches to transition, keep saying it's exactly like being a man or acting out what a man is. If you don't want that, then shut the fuck up, you know nothing.
>another woman acts out in a submissive roleThere are strong dominant femmes who could kick anyone's ass, there are femmes who only top butches, there are femmes who only date femmes, but a fucking lesbophobe wouldn't get that.
No. 263578
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No. 263604
File: 1652457892310.jpg (Spoiler Image,36.97 KB, 564x469, 82c87277c0b6e645783e8e88fe49a4…)
ladies(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
No. 263679
>>263601I'd bet good money she is.
>>263666Give and receive what, head or strap? Or both? Either way you're not weird. My wife and I give and receive head nearly every time we have sex. Strap both ways not so much as I'm physically disabled and overcoming a big illness but we have done it a fair bit in the past and I'm sure we will in the future. I've also done it with a couple other partners. It does take a few hours and a lot of stamina but it's good fun. Don't let people meme you into being either top or bottom, stone or not. For the longest time I felt like I had to be the stone top because I'm a butch and no woman would want to do those things to me anyway but it's simply not true. I think there are more versatile lesbians out there than pure tops or bottoms.
No. 263692
>>263687No offence,
nonny, but do you have mother issues? 'cause I sure as hell do and in my late teens and most of my twenties I also preferred to date older women (most over 40) for their "maturity" but it was all a big cope. I've made my personal and professional life quite awkward by jumping into bed with any older woman who nurtured me in any way shape or form and mentally it kinda fucked me up too. I hope I'm wrong about you and I don't mean to offend you but I don't want to see anyone go down a similar path to me. I relate to not wanting a wokie or soon to be troon gf though. Just hang in there, love strikes when you least expect it.
No. 263694
>>263692It's okay nona, I appreciate your concern though! I don't believe I have mother issues, I had a good and present mother during my childhood, and overall never have felt like I needed the sort of nurturing, in fact that tends to make me feel belittled at times.
Maybe it's all just me not wanting a woke troon who calls everything
problematic or someone who's entirely dependent on me kek. Idk anymore, I'm waiting though lol
No. 263698
>>263666>666kek, but people talking about how a concept exists and isn't the most horrible thing on the planet, doesn't mean you're suddenly weird for feeling like it's not for you. You're completely normal, don't worry too much about it.
>>263679>For the longest time I felt like I had to be the stone top because I'm a butch and no woman would want to do those things to me anyway but it's simply not true.Which is why labels can be actually useful, because that is an assumption people still make. At least if someone has "pillow princess" in their profile I'll know to avoid and I have to indicate I'm "versatile", otherwise I will be put into that "stonetop" box anyway. Even without words like stone or top being in use, they will still project stereotypes from the 40's on butches, so actually having the language to explain what I am and what I'm not is useful. When I was younger I didn't even know what pillow princess, stone, butch, top or bottom was so I was just wondering why I was constantly treated like that and I just had no words for what was going on (I'm ESL and grew up sheltered).
>>263692How does one know they have mother issues? Asking for a friend.
No. 263704
>>263694Aight, sorry for sperging. Glad you had a good mother. Dating older lesbians is definitely safer politics wise. My wife and I are both 30 and the lesbian group we hang out with and go on outings with is mostly older couples as a way of keeping out wokies. It's a sad state of affairs that I don't trust lesbians my age until they've said something "transphobic", but you gotta insulate yourself from handmaiden shenanigans.
>>263698Oh don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of labels. Without the word "butch" I wouldn't have met so many of my friends. I just feel that LGB circles can pressure people to adopt them too fast, now more than ever which is why zoomers go through them so quickly and have like a 100 past labels before finishing puberty. I used to think I was a stone top but now I just say "top leaning" as I can only bottom for someone I'm heavily emotionally bonded with because I have capital I issues about it (dysphoric, nearly trooned out, say no more). I also grew up ESL and sheltered so I get what you mean about the importance of defining yourself.
I'm mother issues anon and for me what helped is deeply examining my attraction to older women. Don't focus on the physical, but the emotional. Are you seeking comfort? Do you feel a deep satisfaction from the most simple acts such as cooking for you, looking after you when sick, etc? Also, if you interact with your mother still, is it because you want to? Or because you feel duty bound? If you still live with her, think about moving out, would you truly want to see her still? Honestly though, it's not that easy working it out. I only pushed my mother halfway out my life two years ago, I'm 30 now and still falling back on old habits and letting my sense of "duty" rule my brain so I end being a sucker that sends her thousands of pounds because she's hitting me with guilt trips.
No. 263715
>>263704>now more than ever which is why zoomers go through them so quickly and have like a 100 past labels before finishing puberty.Seems like that generally happens with the ones living in more progressive areas, I feel like a different species of zoomer sometimes kek
>but now I just say "top leaning" as I can only bottom for someone I'm heavily emotionally bonded with because I have capital I issues about itYeah I get that. I consider myself a submissive or service top generally, which maybe makes no sense, it does in my brain. Factually speaking I'm versatile, but I also can only bottom for someone I really trust. Once that trust level is reached, I'm completely fine with 50/50 usually.
>Do you feel a deep satisfaction from the most simple acts such as cooking for you, looking after you when sick, etc?Hmm not really, I rather prefer cooking and doing stuff for others. I grew up without a mother, don't really know her and last spoke to her on the phone almost a decade ago. That role was taken up by other female family members since I was an infant and they did just fine. So personally I don't feel like I missed anything, but the mother figure is really revered in society. I'm practically hardcore ghosting her, because she won't admit she's an addict and won't acknowledge the reasons why she lost custody in the first place. So I wonder if that still leads to mother issues.
>I only pushed my mother halfway out my life two years ago, I'm 30 now and still falling back on old habits and letting my sense of "duty" rule my brain so I end being a sucker that sends her thousands of pounds because she's hitting me with guilt trips.Ah that sounds rough, I guess I'm not missing much then kek. It's a lot easier to cut off someone you barely know anyway. Alternatively I do have a sense of duty to those female family members, but they generally don't guilt trip me or ask me for anything. It's more that I'm grateful they were there for me and they keep telling me to not get them a mother's day gift and instead save my money kek.
No. 263931
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>>263722I'm sorry
nonnie, I feel this too, even though I'm not in a culture that has strict expectations to have kids. I'm the oldest girl of my siblings and I still feel like I'm the least accomplished, I'm not dating anyone rn so I don't feel like a 'normal' 20 something and I'm stuck in a shitty retail job while my siblings have more career oriented jobs. I know my parents would want grandkids eventually but I'm holding my breath they don't expect any from me soon. It's hard to not want to disappoint your parents but you have to remember you don't exist just to please them (or anyone)
>>263805I don't get why wanting a partner that is nice and to take care of you is mommydom stuff… Isn't that what you should want in a partner? I would get it if like you wanted a gf that did
everything for you, but I would try to take care of my gf whenever she needed it & vice versa, I wouldn't expect one of us to do everything unless she was better at it and liked doing it more. Though I get the older attraction thing, I think I could date someone a little older than me (like early 30's at max, I'm in early 20s) I think this comes from just being attracted to people who have their lives more together than mine though
No. 264080
File: 1652627984600.jpg (8.32 KB, 208x148, 1476588496379.jpg)
Sorry for the super retarded question but how do you protect yourself from std if your hooking up or starting a new relationship ?Obv most of the nonnas here who are sexualy active are in couple so it's not much of an issue for them. I only did stuff where I had no risk of std transmission longtime ago but now I'm a bit worried since I'm trying to date again. I know about the technical stuff ( dental dams or diy alternative ) but wondered how it actually roll out irl.
No. 264102
>>264080I remember they used to give out dental dams for free at a local lgbt centre I went to in my youth, I also remember hearing alot of jokes about them "so has anyone in history ever used one of these things" and sticking with that theme I never ended up using the stash of free ones I had on standby. Even went through a sleeping around phase and I found nobody was thinking of barrier methods when it got down to things.
If you're dating with no overlaps you could just test at the beginning of dating
No. 264174
>>264103tbh just the name dental dam surely did not helped it to be commonly used. interesting to know how it was
>>264102Thanks for the advice nonnies, since we don't see that stuff in sex aid and the online stuff is on the same level of text book explaination it help to have people talk about it more in context. Tbh I'm lucky the STD testing system is good in my country.
Also
>Most see it as overkill but I used to put a condom over my fingers too during sex. Fingernails can retain a lot of germs over the course of the day anyway so I dread to think about adding sex to that equation.Do peoples don't regulary use nail cleaning brush ? As someone who get my hands daily covered in ink and paint this scare me
No. 264180
>>264033Sometimes, it depends on the area like
>>264055 says. Usually it are just nasty looks from old people and mothers who feel like they have to protect their children from the scary dyke kek. It rarely gets violent, but it's possible. In liberal areas you're a lot safer, but you will be aggressively assumed to be a TiF from both political sides and one will constantly ask your pronouns and the other thinks "woman" is an insult and not a statement of fact. I don't know if what I'm saying makes any sense, but they will legit try to use "woman" as an insult and it feels very misogynistic to try to turn a normal word into an insult.
>>264080When I was younger I didn't even know there was protection needed for lesbian sex because sex-ed acted like lesbians don't exist. Only straight people, gay men and trannies. So I was an idiot, but a lucky idiot. Even if people make fun of you for it, insist on using protection.
No. 264556
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>>264500I never knew wtf a dental dam looked like I thought it was something more like pic rel where is goes over your lips. That honestly is more appealing than the rubber sheet those look so clinical and unsexy it would kill the mood super quick. It does remind of those stretchy exercise leg things though I think I would just play with them like that the whole time kek
No. 264650
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>>264590While I was looking these up I found they have fang ones…
ngl it might look stupid but it could be fun to play with different teeth shapes I agree it should something fun to explore with someone and not take too seriously. I think it's one of the reasons why I'm not keen on hookups if I just met the person like that day. I'm too much of a introvert to really let myself loose around someone I just meet. I used to be envious of people who can jump into connections like this but I guess I'm just not like that? I'd rather wait and feel safe with someone I trusted.
No. 264668
>>264650>I'm not keen on hookups if I just met the person like that day. I'm too much of a introvert to really let myself loose around someone I just meet.One thing I will forever regret is how the ~community~ in local gay bars told me to experiment and sleep around as a baby dyke. I'm painfully autistic and couldn't sleep with a random without being drunk and/or high (which naturally led to addiction problems) and as someone who struggled with being both butch and gay I got stuck in a cycle of:
>crave romantic and/or sexual companionship to tell me I'm not a bad person for being homosexual and GNC>need booze and/or drugs to talk to people though>end up having one night stands that do nothing to give me the companionship and acceptance I crave>feel disgusted by my sexuality and try to supress it by not going to gay bars and meeting up with my friends who support my sexuality>become lonely and depressed and unsure about my identity>rinse, repeatSorry for the blogpost but I just want to say that waiting around for the right person is so, so,
so worth it. I'm happily married now but if I could go back in time and do this all over again I would never have casual sex and only sleep with the girlfriends I had a real connection with.
No. 264705
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>>264539I would have questions about how the husbandofaggotry works for you specifically, but you had me until the last point.
>>264668NTA but how it went for me
>be only butch in town>part of emo groups, where it had become popular for everyone to claim they're bi>became designated person to experiment with, get ego boost>most decide it's not for them and immediately go back to men>lonely, feel unattractive because of aforementioned and just want connection so keep allowing being used for experimentingI'm still not sure if I've ever had sex with someone who was actually attracted to me and not because I was just available and visible. I feel like I've been really lucky not to catch anything from that time of my life. Now I feel so emotionally stunted, more avoidant and while I'm far from a virgin, I still feel like I haven't had any real experience. At the same time I've also let myself get strung along by straight women who used me as some sort of celibate female boyfriend, until they got an actual one and it took me a while to pick up on how much of a simp I am. Bit of a mindfuck.
No. 264809
>>264539The most important thing to me by far is having similar personality and interests so
>nerdy af>openminded to trying new things, willing to go out of her comfort zone to experience new things>polite and well-intentioned towards people and animals>loves catsbut when it comes to appearance I'm way less picky. Honestly as long as we get along and have chemistry then that's way more attractive to me, but I do tend to have patterns in who I've dated before.
>mid length hair, around shoulders or shorter, preferably curly/fluffy>strong fashion sense, can be either androgynous/masc or very femme, having a personal style in itself is attractive to me>chest on the smaller side>brown eyes>slim, but some chub is fine, especially around the hips/butt>cute face, big smile No. 264819
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As young as I can remember how I think my adult life would have been, I never saw myself living with a man. I would like have a child or two but always live with a female, a sister or a "friend". Idk why it always appeared naturally like that in my mind, I always wondered if it was the same for other lesbian ?
>did you remember how you projected your adult life as a child?
>Did you saw yourself living with a man ?
No. 264826
>>264819When I was 6, my male best friend and I decided we were getting "friend married" when we were older and living together. Of course we didn't know back then that "friend marriages" weren't a thing so we never got joined together in holy matri-homie. Aside from that I was generally terrified of my future. To this day I don't
really know why. My only guess is that I was starting to realise I was "different" from the other girls and my brain tried blocking it out. By the time I was 13 I did know that I didn't want a man in my life but I didn't really want a woman in my life either. Thing is though, as a butch I've really struggled with female friendships my whole life. I was always the weird nerdy tomboy that none of the other girls could relate to so my experiences are usually different to more gender conforming women. I'm also autistic so naturally I was more inclined towards solitude. I did think about having a child, I thought it would be nice but I didn't want to do the deed with a moid and didn't know sperm banks existed back then. I always just assumed I would be comfortably alone until I got together with my first girlfriend and realised that I do enjoy companionship after all, with the right people. I'm now 30, happily married and my wife and I hope to start trying for a baby in the few months, fingers crossed.
No. 264838
>>264819When I was a child I wanted to become a plant or animal researcher who travels the world and goes on adventures, yes I'm a sperg. I didn't really think about children or marriage. I did self-insert as the guy in some movies, which didn't mean I want to be a man, because most men in those movies aren't like irl men at all, I just really liked the actress. At some point one of my friends got her period early and everything changed, she wasn't allowed to play outside anymore and suddenly everything was about her preparing to become a good wife and mother. I freaked out and had 2 weeks I told everyone I was a boy because of it when I was 7. When I was explained in detail how pregnancy works, I decided I never wanted to get pregnant. Family members started freaking out that I wasn't growing out of being a tomboy and almost sent me to their home country for some sort of femininity training, I managed to luck out and avoid it. I started pursuing other girls when I was 13 (though most came to me)? I insisted I was straight though, because I was basically told that lesbianism is an immature thing you need to grow out of and nobody stays that way. Which was kinda stupid, since I stayed gnc, it was obvious what I am to everyone else anyway. The lesbophobia and some mild conversion therapy made me feel very conflicted, because while I never saw myself living with a man and never wanted to, I did want to be accepted, to be (seen as) mature, so sometimes I did wish I was straight. Especially when my father started making thinly veiled threats.
No. 264843
>>264826Nonnie! I read this thinking this would be a sad tale of solitude but hearing your happy ending made me ♥ hope your baby comes out healthy, I'm sure babby will be extra loved with two mothers. I am really excited to do that in the future too.
Honestly I found your post quite relatable. For me, as a little kid it was
>cutting my hair really short because long hair was annoying>wearing boyish clothes>sometimes calling myself a boy (i am so glad 'trans kids' weren't accepted around 2011-2014>being friends with mostly males but wanting very strongly for girls to accept me>having one female friend who i was way too possessive over>feeling guilty about hugging girls and avoiding contact with other girls>never thinking about a future with a man but wanting a 'best friend' who i stay with forever and live with, pretending to be the husband of my best friends just for a giggleExcept for me, at puberty, I didn't think I was homo. I thought
>'kind of weird I don't find men attractive and I think of women like a man would', but it will probably sort itself out by the time I'm…18? Yeah! I'll like men one day! And I remember in school many people used to call me slurs and I didn't know why. So I chose my male friend and convinced myself I liked him, except when he got romantic i just felt disgusted and avoided him permanently, all whilst having a secret 'involvement' with this other girl (who was a blatant lesbo in retrospect kek). I also watched tutorials on how to act feminine, wore skirts, pretended to like things my friends liked, and it kind of worked for a bit! I felt like I was going to be accepted into girl world. I just wanted to stop being seen as a weirdo/not one of the girls/masculine.
These days I have only just started allowing myself to wear clothes that are more comfortable for me, like I can wear more masculine clothes if I feel like it, and don't feel the need to pretend to like different things. I now know that because I'm a little different I think my life may be a little lonelier, but I'm not pretending to be someone else anymore.
>>264838That's kind of sad anon. I think it's pretty normal for young lesbos see see themselves as men because they don't see other lesbians in real life, so liking women makes them feel like a man. I don't know where you grew up but it's heartbreaking that a little girl loses her childhood for the perceived responsibility of womanhood. I hope you're not in that environment anymore.
No. 264846
File: 1652902852899.jpg (Spoiler Image,144.64 KB, 710x590, Margaret_White_quote.jpg)
>>264843>I think it's pretty normal for young lesbos see see themselves as men because they don't see other lesbians in real life, so liking women makes them feel like a man.I unironically cope by reading books by butch authors where they explain in detail how x character in movie is actually based on a butch and not a man, so if you identified with that character, you still indirectly identified with butchness or something adjacent to it. Maybe it's a retarded cope and butchwashing, but it works for me. I did pick up things from those men in movies and shows, because sometimes I did admire them, but someone like Gomez Addams is not exactly a source of
toxic masculinity, so I think I'm fine. I still don't feel connected to womanhood, because I grew up in an environment where that meant straight housewife and it was always tied to reproduction, fertility and femininity. At the same time I've never actually felt like a man or truly wanted to be a man, because I started hating them pretty quickly and got upset when I was introduced to the concept of transitioning for the first time. I just feel like a butch female.
>I don't know where you grew up but it's heartbreaking that a little girl loses her childhood for the perceived responsibility of womanhood.Biblebelt, it was genuinely shocking. It felt like living in a place where everyone is Carrie's mom (Margaret White picrel). The whole neighborhood was speaking shame of her getting her period early, as if she caused it herself through sinning or something.
>I hope you're not in that environment anymore.I'm not in the most extreme part anymore, but also not exactly a liberal area. Though I don't know if I'd enjoy a liberal area either with all the pronoun stuff and I don't want to be interrogated about my gender (expression).
No. 264850
>>264843I'm glad I could show you there can be light at the end of the tunnel! Also nice to know I'm not alone with wanting to be a mother. I feel like modern lesbian circles are slowly becoming against the idea of having children. From my experience a lot of women will turn it into a political slapfight and insinuate you're a misogynist for it. I don't mean women who simply don't wish to have children (I have plenty of friends who don't and I get it), what I mean is those who ideologically oppose it and are the types to post on r/childfree about how much they hate kids.
>>264846Drop the butchwashing book links, I could do with some copium. I've always had periods of obsession with movie men since I was a tween where I've either been like:
>"Whoa, he's literally me! Except he should be butch instead!".>"Whoa! I want to be him! Except butch!"I also went through a phase of wanting to be called Johnny. Not in a troon way, but in a cool, butch way. Kinda still do, ngl.
No. 264854
>>264846wtf? i don't get why there are places where girls are made to feel guilty for their biology. and when women go along with stuff like this it's extra sad.
i get not feeling connected to womanhood. it helped when i found a circle of dorky weird girls to be feral with, and a sports coach who was a masculine woman and mother who lived on her own terms. if i grew up somewhere like that i would have hated it too. i think 'biblebelt' means america? i always assumed america was really fair to women and that you had freedom, so it was sad to hear some people grow up like that. but yeah i know i would hate being around pronoun people too. it's a fine line kek
>>264850the r/childfree types creep me out tbh. motherhood is very admirable, you're helping build society, and it's not like you stop being a human who does other things after motherhood, especially if your partner is supportive.
No. 264907
>>264080Sorry but whats the point ? there are very little chance to get std and the dental dam are gross and a pain in the arse.
Just be careful if you have cuts in your mouth.
No. 264929
>>264850>Jack/Judith Halberstam - Female Masculinity>Jack/Judith Halberstam - A queer time and place>The Butch Woman Inside James Dean or ‘What Kind of Person Do You Think a Girl Wants?’ by Marie Cartier (her theory is that he hung around butch women and based his characters on them, because he was gay himself).I was given a gender neutral nickname which I still prefer, so I get it.
>>264854>>264875Other countries which seem progressive have biblebelts too. I basically moved with catholic family to an area with the equivalent of FLDS or Pentecostal types. All the women had to wear long dresses and skirts, long hair is very important to them etc. My family is conservative too, but holy shit biblebelt places are on a new level. They even caused my family to walk out during mandatory (because of school) Christmas church service, because they implied Mary is a whore, like no woman is safe from scrutiny, not even fucking Mary.
No. 264933
>>264710Honestly if gay men were larping as anime girls together with no interest in IRL women I would think that's the gayest fucking thing I've seen, it's no different with lesbians. Don't know why so many anons choose to die on the "liking unrealistic cartoon men means you love and desire actual men" hill when they probably wouldn't have a problem with anons simping female characters created by and for men.
>>264705>>264775Yeah personally my experience with bi women has been being treated as "male lite" i.e. someone they don't quite see as a woman but a more emotionally available version of masculinity. It's painful to listen to them gush about men that you can never become and you know they're most likely longing for the muscular, tall Nigel that they'd be proud to date and show off. I mean I absolutely understand why bisexual women end up with men out of convenience, it's much easier since you don't have to deal with homophobia anymore and having children is much easier, but they shouldn't act all hurt and offended when lesbians don't want to date you and don't start whining about how much you hate straight sex and miss having a girlfriend. You made your bed and now you have to lie on it.
>>264819I had this weird thing where I subconsciously knew I was a lesbian but saw myself growing up to a straight marriage because I didn't even know you could have an alternative in my bumfuck conservative town. Yet at some point in my teens I realized this "husband" that I had made up in my head was actually myself and "me as the wife" was the girlfriend that I had dreamed of.
No. 264967
>>264934Anime isn't real.
>>264933>I subconsciously knew I was a lesbian but saw myself growing up to a straight marriage because I didn't even know you could have an alternativeYes same here. I was totally defeated by the idea that I'd have to marry a man because I knew from the start I could never love him. I'd be like "maybe it'd be fine if we were just really good friends…" kek. I feel grateful to have grown up in a relatively progressive area so I had the opportunity to date other girls and realise it doesn't have to be that way.
>>264965I check all of these boxes lmao. Let's date
No. 264973
>>264950Thank you! I'm incredibly nervous but also very excited and already knee deep in baby books kek. My wife and I have the exact same problem with donor ethnicity. When we were still trying to work out the specifics of when to try and where to have it done, etc, we tried finding someone who was my special blend of mutt but to no avail; and my wife was looking for
months. I did try telling her I don't mind using someone who isn't a perfect match, but I can understand how she feels. We're now going to do reciprocal IVF because it feels more natural that we're both involved in the process; thankfully finding a donor for my wife's ethnicity is easier.
No. 264975
>>264934Ugh i get so annoyed by ‘lesbians’ who can’t stop talking about men from books/anime. I hated myself for so long for not being attracted to the male form, or anything resembling a man, so I was so happy to find women who feel the same way. Someone is attracted to drawings of children, would you not think them a pedo? So why is being attracted to a drawing of a man not being attracted to the male form? You’re either biphobic, hate men too much to admit you may be attracted to them, or feel too ugly for a man so pretend you never wanted them anyway. To an outsider, someone who doesn’t use this website, they would think that someone who shlicks to a drawing of a man is obviously attracted to men. But some people here get so hostile about being told they’re not lesbian that no one wants to call them out. And with more posts about this here, I think people are going to get tired of it.
Then there are bisexuals who try to tell us that you can be attracted to the male form and be a lesbian as long as ‘it not real!’, and will come into spaces made for women like us to tell us we’re wrong. Just be who you are. Ok, so maybe you hate men. That doesn’t make you a lesbian. Being bisexual is fine, but lesbianism is not a political statement or a refuge from you issues with men. I just want to be in a space where I’m understood and there are people appropriating it.
I wouldn’t say a man who dreams of fictional men and has figurines of anime boys is straight.
Also, if you want to dress up as an anime boy because it feels more ‘you’, please go ahead. I’m happy to see butch acceptance in this thread. But if you’re attracted to males, fictional male included, and want to sperg about their bodies or how sexy they are, please leave.
No. 264983
>>264978I'm the OP of that dream girlfriend post and I find it very funny how many anons derailed to scold me.
>>264975None of the people defending fujos or yumes ITT were gushing about men or the male form or trying to convince anyone that they should be attracted to men, fictional or otherwise. It's literally just you samefagging and shitting up the thread. You are the only sperg here.
No. 264986
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>>264983>I'm a fujo but my girlfriend is a husbandofag who finds IRL men repulsive. She just asks me to cosplay as her husbandos all the time and I'm fine with it kekI want you to reread this sentence about you masturbating to men all the time and letting your gf pretend you're a man from her animeys and reflect,
dear bi4bi anon.
(derailing) No. 265279
>>265275You can't come to lesbian thread, talk about male characters and get upset people don't like it. Even this anon
>>265073 got redtexted. Go to bi thread.
No. 265320
File: 1653080982839.jpg (9.4 KB, 236x236, cba9f23b1843cd35336aa06fa3db65…)
>coming out story
So I was not coming out, but found out. In the worst way possible.
>be me, 13, hormones are raging
>i was mildly obsessed with mermaids ever since the tv show h20 came out when i was small
>so i doodle mermaids in my spare time
>think…what if booba…BIG BOOBA
>lennyface.jpg
>pretty much the babydyke version of the sketching scene from 'turning red'
>i cut out my booba mermaids and hide them in my schoolbag to look at later
a few days later
>my older sister is being a b word so i steal her tie and hide it in my schoolbag for the keks
>mum says i know you have it give it back or i'll scalp ur bahookie (ass whooping in scottish terms)
>i don't lose my cool
>she approaches my schoolbag
>i freak out a little too much 'MUM I'LL GIVE IT BACK NO'
>i give the tie back
>and my mum says 'what are ye hidin in there?'
>am covered in sweat
>she opens my bag as i freak out and procures my artwork
>'we need to have a talk about this'
>she shuts the door and we have a talk in another room together
>why did ye draw THIS? are ye gay?
>i am making some crazy excuses on the spot:
>i just…love art haha
>it's like societal commentary on how women are viewed (cringe)
>it's a present for someone?
in the end the drawings are binned and we never talk about it again. but i think since then my mum always kind of knew, and it was probably the most mortifying moment of my whole life. please tell me someone else has a more embarrassing story
No. 265408
>>265320I insisted I was straight to family while being a tomboy who pastes pictures of attractive women everywhere (bedroom walls, closet doors, school locker, school agenda, etc.), drawing big booba anime girls and I didn't hide anything, except my exgf, but it was obvious what was going on. I was wondering why people called me a dyke when I'm obviously the straightest straight who ever straighted, which straight doesn't dance with a girl at the school dance while wearing a suit and top hat? I think it's pretty cringe that I brought girls up to my coomer tier bedroom from back then. I don't know if I was too autistic to feel shame, but my family doesn't believe lesbianism is real anyway. They only started freaking out real bad when I turned 16 and they started to get suspicious that I might not grow out of it kek. Some family members have accepted it by now, because I'm such an aggressively obvious case.
No. 265413
>>265394>be you>trip>spaghetti falls out of pockets>your plethora of butts fall out your pocket>your great wealth of butts is guarded by the great dragon Smaug in a deep and hidden cave (shaped like a butt)>you squirrel away your supply of butts in a tree for the winter>>265412I’m HOWLING at the imagery of the ass rat kekekek
>>265367That sounds embarrassing enough to make me feel better lol
Anime thighs are supreme and I understand your interest
>>265408Idk if we’re the same person here, right down to
>why every1 calling me gay??It sounds like you were kind of a player though, hopefully the rest of your family accepts you.
>>265360Not since that day, very tragic lol
>>265382if i did i would be good to her and never hide her skins
No. 265421
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>>265408LMAO i was also very insistent about being straight but i guess my dad suspected something when i begged him to buy me a ranma ½ book with this exact cat girl ranma in the cover, like my dad was just like "really? you want this?"
No. 265696
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i know i should not be angry but, when i was 12 i had this little middle school "girlfriend" and my older sister found out one day, and decided to tell our very religious single mom. she took me to her room and grieved in front of me, crying about how unnatural it was. i remember it weirdly vividly and i even asked her why it was wrong.
now 9 years later my sister comes out as bi & is dating a butch lesbian
>rage
>i don't really care if she was repressing or whatever she still threw me under the bus
No. 265887
>>265741typical polilez pearl clutching, lesbians that arent reserved and practically ace are akin to moids, hmmm? whats moidy about her post, specifically, enlighten me without pulling out seething lesbophobia. Plenty of women have come into this thread before and said they saw a hot woman they would like to preform sexual favors on her. Is it that she mentioned being turned on at her instead of going straight to describing her fantasies of sexual acts that
triggers you so? Women have described much crasser to a positive reaction, which leaves me to believe the problem is with you and your delicate (paranoid) sensibilities. What is the "good" lesbian statement when a woman confesses her attraction? "Omg girls are so pretty!!"? Or "i want to braid her hair and hold hands!!"?
No. 265949
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I was such a comphet when I was younger it make me want to kick my formerself in the jaw.
Also if it was not shit enought I have no "gaydar" and the only girl at school who show interest in me is bi and cheated on her boyfriend with girl.
I wish I was not a stupid autistic lesbian.
No. 265977
>>265887Doubleposting/samefagging because I just saw this but the agp literally samefagged so their sexual fantasy gets attention, see this where he
>>265745 replied to himself two times and then got redtexted. It's literally a very obvious larp.
No. 266205
>>26620132 single virgin here. (man that’s gross). i am very pro-sex toys. self or with a partner. i’m scared of them cause they’re so powerful but so many women swear by clit suckers. i ended up giving mine away.
I don’t know how toys feel like with partners. but i could never masturbate acoustically. putting my own fingers in myself feels like when the doctor does it. or like trying to tickle myself.
No. 266219
>>266201When I'm with a partner strap-on play just isn't high on my list of things to do usually. Like anon above I mostly crave penetration close to or even during my period so I go solo with a toy. I can't personally be arsed initiating strap-on play with a risk of blood. Thanks body lol
I used to like Tantus toys alot but where I live now customs rates make them too pricey for me, I switched to Lovehoneys own range of silicone toys. Both have a decent range of harness compatible toys or offer bundles where you can buy the set together.
No. 266344
>>266201With my gf we quickly bought sex toys. A strap but also bondage and a whip. It's ok but the installation time is annoying kek. It's less spontaneous. My girlfriend craves penetration tho so she loves it.
Also quite embarassing but using a strap quite worsen my dysphoria about having a penis.
No. 266348
>>266346Since little I wanted to be a boy. Then porn kinda fed this dysphoria - since it's mens POV. And finally yeah using a strap on a woman doesn't help to fight the dysphoria !
But no worries I know I could never be a man.
No. 266364
>>266363and not to be too graphic but:
eating a girl out while I grind on her leg until she comes & she then devotes attention to me >>>>
No. 267027
>>267019I
used to consider myself stone butch. I grew up in a very conservative religious environment, lesbian sexuality was unknown to me, let alone butch sexuality. When I did start looking into things online I thought butches were meant to give and seldom receive. I figured I was such a freak I should be happy to live that way. I ended up with women where I couldn't properly communicate my sexual feelings and desires and even if I could these pillow princesses weren't going to listen. Not judging pillow princesses as a whole, I just had shitty luck with women for a while. TMI but I come easily so if I was using a strap-on I would be satisfied that way anyway, for years I told myself that was enough and not to ask for more. Even my "romantic" partners still saw me as basically male so head for me was never really on the table and because I felt awkward getting it with these women I assumed I didn't like it. There was also elements of dysphoria in there that I had to overcome. Things changed with my wife though, she also grew up in a religiously conservative environment so she knew I'd be weird about sex too. For the first time in my life I
talked about sex before having it. We took it slow while I did some more research. This post actually helped me a lot:
http://dirtywhiteboi67.blogspot.com/2009/06/stone-butch-blues-stone-butch-shame.html?zx=6b254407f118b064 and after a lot of going slow and communicating with her I now have a healthy sex life. I do know several other butches who had nearly the exact same experience that I did. There probably are some women out there who are happy being stone, but I think the proliferation of the term "stone butch" has made butches even more hesitant to explore our sexuality. We already deal with being treated like men so when hear about this concept a lot of us are like "oh, that must be me then". Heaven forbid we think about it or ask for more and not be anything other than a stereotype, we're already on thin ice in the LGBT community for being dinosaurs of the past who apparently single-handedly uphold gender roles and
toxic masculinity. You'd think in 2022 these issues would be better, but I still see a lot of baby butches go straight to identifying as stone butch without ever really thinking about things and finding themselves a partner who truly listens and doesn't treat them as two dimensional. Sorry for the word vomit and not really being stone butch. But I did live that way for nearly 15 years, so yeah.
No. 267035
>>267033Oh I agree, getting rid of the term would do next to nothing as masc women are already pressurised into certain believes. I'm ESL and before I ever immigrated or learned that term I had been conditioned to think that way. But with internet communities now often trumping IRL ones and with English being the predominant language online I think the meme'ing of "stone butch" to just mean "extra butch" is fucking things up a bit. I agree Stone Butch Blues is nuanced, but also I don't think it's
that nuanced. I think it was too little, too late in the story. Feinberg was a fencesitter wanting the troon asspats and the homelike community from other lesbians so it's no mystery her writing comes off as at odds with itself. Not trying to argue with you, this issues goes way beyond that book anyway.
No. 267039
>>267035The futch scale is the bane of my existence kek.
Butches were considered fencesitters in general at that time. At some point you were expected to either femme it up a little so you could fit in with radfems, because all the femmes had moved on to radical feminism, or you were expected to transition and fit in with the trans activists. There was no place for butches anymore and no I don't consider whatever polilez were doing to be inclusive of butches at all, the world turned black and white. Fencesitting should be allowed and forcing people to pick a side is only going to cause more trouble, when you don't fit in at either side. I think that's what Feinberg was trying to say and that's why both sides FUCKING HATE that book. Same reason both sides practically hate all butch authors for trying to be nuanced and trying to explain that you can't expect anyone to pick a side, when it means having to get rid of a part of yourself either way.
No. 267073
>>267061This fucked me up for a long time. I'm married and we're going to try for kids soon via reciprocal IVF which, don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly grateful for, but it's kinda bittersweet that genetically the kid isn't a mix of us. Originally we were going down the traditional sperm donor route where I played no biological part but it upset my wife, it was very important to her to have my child after some health scares I've had. I hope if we have a second kid (we've always talked about having 2 or 3) we can have one who is biologically hers though. I guess it's always gonna be a battle of sorts because we each want the others biological child, it's only natural to desire that. God, I fucking hate being homosexual sometimes. Opposite sex attracted people have it so easy and take the power to produce a child that is both you
and your partner for granted.
No. 267074
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>>267069Same
nonnie same. I'm hoping there is someone out there who is a little weird like me, I don't want to be a normie couple.
The problem is I don't even know how to approach women who I could be interested or vice versa. I
know I get looks and compliments from girls flirtaciously (or at least I read it like that- is it projection perhaps?) but I never know if they are being sincere or just being polite. Idk how lesbian I read, I do dress a little unconventional in baggy clothes but have a fem face and body, so people might just assume I'm a straight girl with bad style. The only person that had a crush on me in years was a moid (go figure)
Sorry for the blogpost, hope we both meet someone cool one day
No. 267221
>>267213>They're some flavor of 'queer' but ultimately still fairly femme even when they have short hair.I never get this. They'll have short hair, still wear feminine shit, still wear some make-up and everything, but they decide the short hair alone means they have to use they/them pronouns and are totally nonbinary. Like I get that people think it's ridiculous no matter what you look like, but it just feels silly to have to treat someone like "not-a-woman", when they're 100 times more feminine than me.
>>267219>Anyways I wish I had another butch to hold hands with at pride this month.It's not pride here yet, but same.
No. 267244
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I hate being expected to choose a gender identity, to have something I feel like on the inside. No I don't feel like a woman and I don't like to be gendered feminine all the time, no I don't feel like a man on the inside either, or at least I hope not because I fucking hate them. Nonbinary doesn't make any sense to me either, because I'm not ambiguous, I'm obviously on the masculine side of the gender expression spectrum and I'm female. You know what I feel like on the inside? Like shit, a freak. Why do I have to say which pronouns I'm okay with? I legit don't give a shit if you want to call me she, he or they. Why does everything have to mean something, why do I have to commit or pick a side? Why do I have to either be completely comfortable being a woman or try to be a whole ass man?
Why can't I just "bind" one day and not the next? Why can't I be given just a tiny bit of testogel to increase bone density after being put on birth control during puberty (yes I already lift)? Why do I have to choose to either become a whole ass fucking man or change my identity, because for some reason we've decided that women aren't supposed to have testosterone? Oh no you might get a stray hair at these tiny baby dosages! But they are fine with giving it to you in GIGA dosages if you decide you want to be a whole ass man and get lots of surgeries. It's legit fucking retarded that people have decided that wanting any form of T ever means you must be a repper or want to be a man. Ever heard of female bodybuilders and athletes? Ever heard of how T can be used by regular ass women for health? Did you know that the only reason researchers thought it was a bad idea, was because it was unbecoming of a laadyyyy to maybe get a stray fucking hair? Did you know they used to recommend that you'd take T alongside birth control exactly to avoid losing bone density? They stopped that recommendation, because it didn't feel very ~feminine~ to recommend THE MALE HORMONE (even though women literally need it too) to women.
Retards on both fucking sides have decided that taking hormones or wanting to take them means you are trutrans and should be pushed out or dragged into the community and means you can't be butch, but that you have to want to be a man. No I wouldn't want to be on T all my life, just to fix whatever damage is done and to gain more muscle.
How come it's fine to mess with the hormones of teenage girls through birth control, because doctors can't be fucked to figure out why you have highly irregular periods or very painful periods. But oh no, T for an adult is too far, laddiiiess aren't supposed to want that! No matter how tiny the dose is. It must mean you're a real mans man or want to be one! All I want is to be in the upper ranges of what is normal for females, that's all.
I'm a fencesitter, always will be. I like having small boobs which I can easily hide with a good sportsbra, a super mild binder or just a regular sweater. Other times I like wearing a T-shirt and making it obvious I'm braless. I'm never going to want surgery, I know that for sure. I would never want any legal recognition or change my name, because I actually enjoy confusing authorities and the government. People sometimes use a gender neutral nickname for me, but I'm also fine with my given name, as long as they don't use the diminutive version. I enjoy that people come up with something else every time they see me, I don't want to tell them what I am, it's more interesting to see what they think.
I let people think I'm a boy if it's safer for me and it gets me treated better. I let people know I'm a woman if I think that suits me better. I'll say I'm transmasc to hang around other masc female lesbians around my age, because butches don't exist anymore and honestly I don't care to isolate myself for purity reasons of the RF cause. I'm attracted to butches, but if I say I'm a butch lesbian, they get muh dysphoria, so it's to get a foot in the door. My fencesitting gets people to think about how you don't have to go "all the way" and they detransition. I don't have much success in the romance department, but I've got that going for me.
You know how many my age think butch is a dirty word and have zero clue about butch history? They think it means being ugly, fat, old and mean. Not that there's anything actually wrong with those things, but that's all the representation of butches they see in the media. If they actually read the queer theory they claim to love, they would know that there were all sorts of butches. Including butches in grey areas who would be on T, would bind occasionally, be a drag king on the weekends etc. People nowadays (on both sides) draw these weird fucking lines in the sand as a form of cope or because they're deadly afraid that if they'll cross it even with their pinky toe, it means they will fully transition or that they are a scary butch. Some people draw the line at binding, many draw the line at being on/wanting T, to the point that there's not much difference between either side's logic. Unironically proving horseshoe theory right.
Am I coping? Maybe. I have to do something to deal with the fact that I'm at risk of being used as a political pawn by either side, which doesn't actually give a fuck about me. I'm just trying to connect with masculine females all over the political spectrum, live my fucking life and present in the weirdly specific way I want to present myself. Hopefully find a partner, or something.
No. 267250
>>267248>And how will fencesitting work out when the trans mascs find out you hold terven views?Many secretly hold terven views themselves and have no problem shitting on AGPs behind closed doors?
>You're gonna have to pick a side eventuallyNobody would have to pick a side if they weren't constantly hounded and told to do so. Judith Halberstam predicted the gender wars that are going on now already back in the 90's. Nobody wanted to listen to her, but both sides of the political spectrum have manipulated masculine females to infight only further and draw tribalistic lines in the sand. Instead of realizing that masculine females who chose differently aren't the enemy, but that either side will use you as a political pawn to discard later. Siding 100% with radfems means having to apologize for being in the women's bathroom or avoiding it, having to pretend I'm totally okay with femininity, always making it obvious I'm such a fucking female even to my own detriment and safety, having to isolate myself and disavow TiFs etc. Having to side 100% with TRA's, well you already know the downsides of that, but not everything is bad all the time. Several TiFs decided to detransition after meeting me. I think my approach works better than to call them mentally ill gender traitors who should all kill themselves for having internalized misogyny like practically every other female.
No. 267251
>>267245This is hilarious I admit but also very dismissive. I don't think OP is constantly ranting and raving like this. It seems to me more like she's been bottling up all this frustration for a long time and finally let it out.
>>267244I'm sorry it's been so difficult for you. Being a lesbian is isolating, a masculine woman doubly so. I respect your dedication to looking for the grey areas of life and not allowing yourself to be subsumed by extremist opinions. I wish it was easier for everyone to just be themselves.. And I hope that you'll find more friends who understand you and love you exactly as you are.
No. 267265
>>267247Don't be an idiot, just get on some dating apps and meet people at gay bars. It's not rocket science. There are tons of people in your exact situation, you can meet them if you make an ounce of effort. Definitely don't rape yourself just to live a lie, it doesn't work.
>>267250I'm not seen as a total butch (whatever the fuck that even is, lol) but I've actually been a GNC role model and caused a lot of my lesbian friends with dysphoria to reconsider as well, just by existing the way I do. Many tifs and handmaidens actually just don't know much about the TRA camp. When they see a healthy GNC lesbian who isn't afraid to share her perspective they often realize they do relate to us just fine. TRA's just weaponize nurturing language to prey on vulnerable women. Glad you're out there too, showing people you can just present whatever way you want and not be a tool for political fuckery.
No. 267275
>>267019High femme/pillow princess here, I think some of it is repression. I grew up Catholic and With my family where I got little to no privacy. I was a virgin til my late 20’s so I never felt the need to do that or experiment or anything, I never masturbated like most woman either I would cross my legs and I always felt like if I couldn’t finger myself how could I finger another woman? (That’s just me tho I’m know other lesbians started out not knowing how to do things and just learned) the only person I’ve ever been intimate with is my gf. but part of it is I just don’t think I’ll get enjoyment of giving during sex. I’ve never liked when ppl told me I had to try things to figure out if I liked them or not. I know myself really well to know I wouldn’t and in my lonely lesbian years the thought of trying to please someone didn’t turn me on. I am open to trying different things with my gf I just have to make sure she’s comfortable with me doing it
My gf is stone butch, she leans heavily towards being non-binary and it makes me sad but she says she doesn’t like being touched because she doesn’t like ..to feel like a woman? Like being reminded she has a vagina. I feel like our dynamic could change we’ve both talked about it In depth and I told her I’m open to doing certain things like going down on her and she says she’s open to it. You have to go into it knowing who you both are and and understand that someday it could change, or even stay the same, and that you’re both okay with that. We talk about sex a lot, and not in a sexy flirty way but In what does good sex look like to the both of us and boundaries and things like that just to make sure neither of us is missing something in our sex lives. I tend to be more vocal if I dislike something, while my gf is more passive and thinks she can do anything for me as long as I’m happy and it’s a bit unhealthy I want to make sure she’s really happy in her sex life too.
Something lots of lesbians don’t realize is that all stone butches are different. I've heard from other high femmes/pillow princesses that they’ll do some giving like fingering or oral if their stone gf asks them to, but lit’s really rare when they do I think all stone butches really dislike penetration , the main one stone butches want to avoid is having the strap used on them (which is perfect for me because as a high femme I never want to be the one wearing the strap). Writing it out it just sounds like being stone butch is like any other lesbian with preferences on penetration but I just feel like their boundaries are stricter and I imagine for casual dating or hookups a label like stone butch is really useful for those who want to be clear about their boundaries
I agree that no matter what, butches/masc lesbians are always expected to top or be dominant and it’s gotta be annoying and tiring to have that stereotype
No. 267328
>>267275>butches/masc lesbians are always expected to top or be dominant and it’s gotta be annoying and tiring to have that stereotypeI'm a faggot butch (also into femmes though) and I honestly hate that when I hit on the rare few other butches on datingapps that it's assumed that I think they're less masc than me and that I just want to top them. Or they think I just want to be friends, which would be cool too, but no I want them to [explicit sexual description with homoerotic wrestling included]. Oddly enough, TiFs are more comfortable with it? With femmes I'm more a servicetop, submissive topping, I don't want to step on anyone. In a relationship, I would probably eventually let a femme do everything occasionally, but for a hookup? Nope. Am I being ridiculous? Probably, but since butches are so rare, it feels like if I give the greenlight for one thing, there are femmes who think everything is suddenly okay. Or they mock that I'm okay with one thing, but not the other. Or they get visibly turned off for me allowing anything. With other butches/masc females I think they get it more and don't suddenly treat me differently or as more feminine for wanting to receive.
No. 267332
>>267326Yeah if it were so easy and everyone agreed with it, I wouldn't get shit constantly in the women's bathroom, having to avoid the women's lockerroom since primary school, my own fucking doctor talks about me like I'm not one of many other women when she has a literal scan in front of her face with everything on there. I've been pushed out of womanhood my entire life and now I'm suddenly expected to feel super duper comfortable in it and wanting to claim it? Technically they're right, but if it were the case, why is everything targeted towards women always assuming that they're all heterosexual, all gender conforming? Even within radfem spaces "all women do xyz" "no women do xyz" "no woman looks like that/is shaped like that/fits in men's clothes"etc. I was already peaked before I found radical feminism, never even been a part of TRA shit or anything and constantly hearing that crap so much was just more alienation. Shit I never thought of as weird, was suddenly something women just never do. So how am I supposed to feel, when on one hand it's supposedly as simple as woman = adult human female, but the moment you actually become part of radfem spaces, you are bombarded with extremely restrictive lists and descriptions of what a real woman is supposed to be like? Getting accused of writing like a man or thinking of like a man? Like fucking hell, I thought I had finally found a place where gender nonconforming women would be accepted. Not one big celebration of femininity, heterosexuality, celibacy, lesbophobia and female socialization.
No. 267343
>>267342First of all, some semblance of proper grammar would help kek. In all seriousness though, the prompts her gives you are pretty decent, full body, face, with friends or animal if you have any, some casual and some more made up but never your best pics, you don’t wanna look like shit compared to them irl. I also add some meme that dog whistles my
terf opinions
No. 267348
>>267343kek my english is broken today. I had difficulties to put a finger on the never put your best pics. I was thinking about putting some songs in my bio that sound a bit terfy ( ref to biological female stuff in the lyrics)
>>267346thank you! I'm so bad with this type of stuff. I will have to dive for some, I'm the type who never take pics.
No. 267352
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>>267348I used some pics of family member's cringe compilation of me doing random shit, because I don't take many pics either kek
>>267350I actually used books for signaling I'm terfy under one of the questions, but which have enough plausible deniability.
No. 267464
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>>267460"Hey publishers, can I have lesbian books?"
"We have lesbian books at library."
The lesbian books at library:
No. 267471
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>>267464Legit, trying to avoid books by polilez is like traversing a minefield. Rubyfruit jungle is often touted as a lesbian novel, but Rita Mae Brown was a polilez, doesn't even believe homosexuality exists and thinks everyone is bi.
No. 267519
>>267460ayart
i fucked up. that’s on me. the only other lesbian books i know are smutty or a very indulgent story about a werewolf who falls in love with a pathologist(i think) and they develop the emotional connection where they can sense each other.
yes it’s cringe as fuck judge me all you like.
No. 267541
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>>267519Name the werewolf book and author and nobody gets hurt.
No. 267558
>>267519Aww
nonnie, it's ok, if straight women can have their cringe viking barbarian romance books and 50 shades of grey, lesbians can read cringy smut books about werewolves too.
Where do you find lesbian books? The only place I know is Goodreads, but they all are tagged and referred to as "queer" or "sapphic" and it is never made clear how truly lesbian are the characters and romance (or if there is one) in the books
No. 267587
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>>267541kek i dug my kindle out just for you
nonnie. Wolf by Meghan O’Brian. It’s exactly what you’re expecting.
>>267558I’ll search on good reads then google them for a more in depth synopsis or review. Tipping the Velvet had good reviews and was made into a BBC show but i’ve not watched it yet.
No. 267605
File: 1654129003479.jpg (33.44 KB, 307x475, 6773700.jpg)
>>267587Omg anon nta but I've read this and I loved it so much. If you have any other werewolf book recs please post them. I read picrel last month and it was okay but it has
some weird a/b/o type dynamics. the alphas don't have dicks at least, but iirc there's some weird supernatural clit stuff and magic squirting. I skipped about 1/3 of the scenes..
No. 267660
>>267625Yeah I'm indeed taller than you and do fit the other points, though I have no clue what your voice is like kek
>The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari 1920>Solaris 1972>Mister Designer 1987>The ugly swans 2006>Cat people 1942>Noroi the curse>Pulse 2001>Jacob's ladder>Midsommar>The babadookSome horror movies I like, to give an idea
No. 267679
>>267587Bless you for digging out your kindle,
nonnie. ♥ I'm gonna get this today and read over the long weekend. I need more indulgent lesbian fiction in my life.
No. 267727
>>267720Maybe you should for real? I just checked out LChat thread about books, as
>>267599 recommended, and from what I gather a lot of published books are so bad, they even have grammar/spelling mistakes. Girlies are settling for formulaic basic stories simply because the bar is truly in hell. So I think if something is good, it has a chance of getting a lot of attention.
Congratulations on getting published!
No. 267863
>>267711AYRT, I feel very vindicated now that I've never bothered to read the book.
>>267720Congrats and please do! I wanted to write books too, but I think I'm a little too schizo for it.
No. 267941
>>267872Every time I make an attempt at reading yuri because that's apparently the requirement for being a true lesbian it feels porny and uncomfortable, and this is coming from someone who has a high sex drive and finds women ungodly irresistible. Girls barely aged 18 (but often drawn way younger) living the lesbian life transbians think lesbians do. And even the ones that are supposedly serious center around the retarded "but we're both girls" drama with the other one being a mousey unkempt geek and the other an assertive popular high femme. Even BL developed past those tropes and has more variety these days.
I wish lesbian media wasn't just either coomershit or some tryhard artsy feminist performance piece, I just want a regular story about two adult women falling in love. I loved "My lesbian experience with loneliness", I want more of that.
No. 267958
I wouldn't say it's my type but I hate the pattern of women i'm attracted to
>bpd>bpd>histrionic>npd>bpd>>267640This missed connection
No. 268010
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>>267941God me too
nonnie. I just want to see two adult and normal women together. I'm also constantly looking for stuff with two nerdy women being together but I guess it's not sexy enough for men. Does anyone knows some good stuff ?
No. 268026
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>>267624umm… she just described me actually?
No. 268095
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>>268030>>268062I read a lot of GL and mainly use mangago to find them but honestly it's pretty hit and miss. Most yuri manga is as other anons described, scroty as hell and just unbearable. There are a few diamonds in the rough though, Still Sick, How Do We Relationship? and Crescent Moon and Donuts come to mind. Most of the stuff I enjoy is korean or chinese GL webtoons cause they're very obviously written by women and rarely feature underage girls. Here's some on the top of my head (genres and quality vary widely, you can find them all on mangago and a lot are legally available as in English as well):
>Opium>Ring My Bell (cute af highly recommend)>Swallow Tail>Mojito>Mom, I'm gay>Bai Lijin among mortals>Straight Girl Trap>Her Shim Cheong>Re-Blooming>Relationship Guidelines>Kill Switch>Please Leave My House>Pan Focus>Unrequited Love Skill>After the curtain call>Maid in heaven>Soulmate>My princess charming>Would You? Could You?I could add more but I'm starting to think that I have a problem kek. Judging a book by its cover is key here. Just browse and pick the ones with art that isn't very male gazey
tfw no gf to sperg about GL with No. 268219
File: 1654423565022.jpg (60.74 KB, 564x618, wife.jpg)
>>268095thank you so much
nonnie, this is amazing, I will check all of them!
>I could add more but I'm starting to think that I have a problem kekPlease do it if you have time!
No. 268228
>>267727>>267863Thank you, both! Actually my grammar and spelling is a lot of what holds me back from branching out, as stupid as that sounds. I only got published with the the help of online grammar checkers, my wife and my editor. I'm ESL and dropped out of school at 15 so you can imagine what my raw manuscripts looked like kek. Also I'm a certified schizo and my book survived two separate psychotic episodes, so don't worry about it too much. I found that writing out my schizo tangents in a separate document helped me a lot. It's like vomiting, you just gotta get it out of you.
>>268171If you don't mind me asking, what kind of conversion therapy did you have? I had aversion therapy where I took a drug that made me sick whilst lesbian pornography was shown to me. For a while I couldn't get past kissing and even that was a struggle for me. From talking to other lesbians who went through this kind of conversion therapy there's no real roadmap to success. The most obvious thing is to go slow, of course. If you had aversion therapy though do NOT try to initiate sex after eating, I needn't explain why. Give it 4-6 hours if you can, you'll still dry heave but at least you're not repeating the link of lesbian sex = being physically sick. If you have an understanding partner just spend a lot of time of being tactile with them but not in sexual way. Hold them, be held. Stroke them, massage them, etc. But don't escalate it. What helped me was doing this clothed at first for about 5ish times before graduating to underwear for a while before finally graduating to being naked but still keeping it non-sexual. Bringing hobbies into this can help. I would play video games while being held or lying next to my wife and it would help with repairing my associations of being with a woman. It sounds odd but basically just get your brain to understand that being undressed or nude with a woman = happy chemicals. Then from there go to making out and progress sexually at the pace of a snail. It's not perfect and even now I will suddenly retch sometimes. I don't think I'll ever be
fully healed but I do have a healthy sex life. If you don't have a romantic partner I suggest looking into sexual/intimate therapy, I forget the proper name for it but basically these therapists will hold you whilst on a couch or a bed while you talk things through. Sounds skeevy, I know, but I promise it's not prostitution (although some women in the US tell me some "therapists" do offer sex), apparently it helps. That's all that comes to mind for now, sorry for the wall of text. If you have any questions though feel free to ask. I wish you the best, nona.
No. 268232
>>268171>>268228NTA, but I think I was lucky. The kind I got was mostly just talking and not much aversion. Also things like yelling and hitting with a ruler and an "exorcism" to cast the "male demon" out kek. So I don't have a physical response like disgust, but just a whole bunch of psychological brainworms. I sometimes go into a panic about how lesbianism doesn't exist, women can't really be attracted to women, I'm just a dirty fetishist, nobody could ever love me blablabla. I get
triggered when people shit on hedonism, because me "giving into my unnatural impulses" was framed as hedonism which would ruin my life and is just mindless pleasure seeking. But stuff like that is a lot easier to overcome and push to the side, than an involuntary physical response I assume. I have created my own schizo lesbian Christianity as a cope, which does actually work somewhat because there were saints and nuns who dressed as men and lived with women and were accused of sleeping with them. So apparently butch lesbians do have grace, ha! I can't even really believe in a god and yet I still need the cope because "what if"? I also went to get massages at a spa to be okay with being touched and to not feel as much like a disgusting horrible monster who shouldn't be allowed to exist.
No. 268233
>>268171I think you might need trauma-based therapy to work through this one. Just imagine you have PTSD and sex is your
trigger. If you can find a therapist specifically trained in trauma recovery who understands your situation and is unbiased against lesbians, they should be able to help you. If you can't trust a professional with your story like that, there are plenty of other options to try. Reading books about trauma is a good place to start, like Jasmin Lee Cori's Healing From Trauma. She outlines many different jumping off points for working through your pain.
No. 268240
>>268232>I have created my own schizo lesbian Christianity as a copeAnon, are you me? I converted to Christianity after becoming disgusted with Judaism only to create bigger problems for myself with conversion therapy (I'm
>>268228). I managed to walk away from conversion therapy before my exorcism though, so I guess I still have my male demon kek. I got yelled at daily for being butch though and hit for talking back about it. I know exactly what you mean though about the "what if?" feeling, and yes there were butches in the religion! We're not alone! Men just don't know how to interpret divine grace, tbh. Now I kinda view my homosexuality like my autism: a developmental disorder that is not natural but not inherently evil either. I think the most powerful force in the universe is love, so how can my love make me evil? I know it's mental gymnastics but I was raised in a strict religious environment and I just
need that religious framework behind me in life to make me feel at ease. I'm sure you know the feeling.
No. 268257
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>>268240Evidently the exorcism didn't work on me, so I think it doesn't matter either way kek. I think men are just hypocritical, if they actually followed theology to the letter, they would know you can only say where grace is and not where it isn't. That no sin is worse than the other, so you can't single out gay people like that even if it were an actual sin. But especially when they don't give alcoholics or pedo's even as much shit as they do gay people. The original texts don't even condemn homosexuality per se, but pederasty and pedophilia. Typical that they changed that into condemning homosexuality, leaving out the pedo part, of course men would do that. I view my homosexuality as god given and nobody can truly say why god did that and they would be lying if they said they actually had any idea. Ironically enough what kickstarted accepting myself was hanging around a bunch of nuns, who told me about what their life was like before they became a nun, many were lesbians. They told me to go live my life and do what they didn't get the chance to do.
>I think the most powerful force in the universe is love, so how can my love make me evil?If the only true commandment is love god and thy neighbor, technically you're just doing what Jesus told you to do. The truly evil thing is conversion therapy and trying to make people not love people.
>I know it's mental gymnastics but I was raised in a strict religious environment and I just need that religious framework behind me in life to make me feel at ease. I'm sure you know the feeling.I guess I do. It's weird though because I don't think I've ever been able to truly believe in a god. I never really got the comforting from it. Yet it's still something that nags me in the back of my mind. Pascal's wager I guess.
No. 268268
>>268249It all works out in the end usually, I told my mother I was Bi and I've never said oh actually I'm a lesbian but with enough of my man hating she knows. Same with my father now I think about it but he just straight up asked if I was a lesbian.
I unfortunately cannot weigh in on friends because I never really bothered coming out to them and just stay Bi so the ones who could be secret homophobes stay secret.
No. 268276
>>268257I love that quote from Anne Lister so much. On a good day I truly believe that, but most of the days it's the developmental disorder thing that I mentioned. Considering that my average opinion used to be "unholy, unnatural, I should kms" that's a huge improvement. Moids really did butcher theology, I haven't met many nuns but the ones I have talked to have all said things that hugely helped me and impacted me. If only men of the cloth imparted wisdom at the same rate.
>>268268>I never really bothered coming out to them and just stay Bi so the ones who could be secret homophobes stay secret.I genuinely don't mean this in a cruel way, but you need to grow a fucking spine. If you're content to stay friends with a potential homophobe because it might cause social disruption and you might lose that person as a friend you will never lead a truly happy life where you are comfortable as who you truly are. I know that sounds harsh but I did the same thing you did as a teen and when I ended up in a relationship with a woman I was socially ostracised and such a pussy that I didn't even say anything. To this day I regret it and wished I was honest about who I was and stood my ground against those piece of shit homophobes.
No. 268297
>>268276I get you genuinely and if a friend of mine came up straight and was like yes I am homophobe I'd drop them (and so would my other friends, they're progressive but not the the extremes) as I've done publicly in the past (to a racist). Luckily we all grew up around diversity.
Only one of my friends I would wonder, but I think she's more the "lol don't have a crush on me!!" type than anything.
No. 268336
>>268233Sometimes I feel like I can't even ask or say anything to anyone because it's all stuff I chose to put myself through. I had a planned life trajectory that needed to stay on course for the good of my family (long story but I will be a caregiver to a family member when my parents can't) and as a teenager I couldn't see that happening if I was gay because I would either be kicked out or given an exorcism like my friend D and I couldn't let either of those things happen for my own sanity. It's so fucked and stupid I can't even talk about it without feeling like an insane person. Not even anonymously how fucking dumb is that.
I still ended up coming out when I was an adult and just utterly panicking and doing it in the stupidest way. And now I've got all these horrible memories and associations that pop up what feels like every five minutes. What I went through doesn't even compare to what the other anons here had to live with but I still feel like I'll never be able to heal from this.
Typing this up I think you're absolutely right. I need to talk to my therapist about this or at least tell her I need to talk about it, she's good at sussing me out. Sorry if this is incoherent I just feel so ashamed of myself. I hate talking about sex at all and it feels weird to go to therapy so you can enjoy it more.
No. 268385
>>268336>>268337That's ok, nona. I'm
>>268228 and I willingly put myself through conversion therapy too. I think it's more common than most people would imagine. It doesn't mean that we that we don't have the "right" to talk about our experiences, we suffered too. If we were of sound mind we would have never put ourselves through that in the first place. I hope you find a way to help heal yourself, nona, you deserve it. We all do. ♥
No. 268425
>>2684181) a wife, obviously
2) secluded property where we could live unbothered
3) scrotes to leaves us alone, really all women who don't want their attention
No. 268429
>>268418Can no more troonsbians be a gimme?
>unlimited money to buy my wife gifts and take her on dates>publishing deal for my gay little stories>more irl lesbian/bi women friendsThis was cute anon
>>268385Same to you, I hope we can both heal. Thank you again, I really appreciate it.
No. 268469
>>2684181. Wife
2. House
3. Cat(s)
No. 268673
>>268509I think she's mad at the other people who made butches feel that way, not you. I understand the anger because I was also bullied as a kid because everyone thought I was a boy, lol. This was way before the trannyshit. Heteros just hate women who aren't feminine as fuck or just happen not to fit beauty standards.
Trooning out in the past(before 20th century) was mostly reserved for women who wanted to marry other women or work in male professions. Rather than being gnc, those women were discriminated against and held back just by the fact they were women and most didn't want to become man, they just acted like one. Afterwards, society's views on women changed and the women who were bullied for being gnc either went all the way or tried their luck at looking feminine.
No. 268732
File: 1654609769618.png (222.85 KB, 512x547, bleh.png)
>>268724>Won't say what she wants but punishes you anyway when you don't give it to herThis made me groan. Totally. Even if the punishment isn't intentional (ex. she withdraws involuntarily) it's a red flag. Adults should be capable of communicating their needs.
No. 268842
>>268724Here's my red flag special for my fellow butches IIT, all of which stem from experiences I've had in real life:
>bisexual women who have only or mostly dated men and talk obsessively about men they find hot>being treated like a dildo on legs, sex is only about penetration and your needs are barely considered>supporting troons>thinks being butch is a choice>thinks you emulate men>assumes your butchness stems from trauma>finds it funny when you have stereotypically feminine traits or hobbies>faghag>doesn't take you to meet friends or family when they claim to be openly same sex attracted>is into polilez activists and authors>no GNC women in friend group>calls you daddy, zaddy or any other variation>degrades butch4butch relationships and friendships>derides you or is disappointed in you when you cry or show emotional vulnerability and intimacyI've probably missed a few but that's all I can think of for now.
No. 268934
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>>268842This is why I barely dare to date femmes at this point, those points hit too close to home.
No. 268938
>>268895>disney urgh every adult woman i’ve met who’s obsessed with disney has been so manipulative and self obsessed.
Cosplay is a red flag. Self own too cause i cosplay and I can be a judgey bitch. But some cosplayers can just be the absolute worst women you’ve ever met.
No. 268957
>>268934AYRT and big same. I'm so relieved my wife is GNC because after dating femmes I just don't think I could marry someone like that. I know it works for some butches and I'm not bashing it. But for me personally I've been burned too many times, I needed a partner who gets it.
>>268938>urgh every adult woman i’ve met who’s obsessed with disney has been so manipulative and self obsessed.I won't even befriend people who are obsessed with Disney. They're emotionally immature, narcissistic and like you said, manipulative. Fucking weirdos too.
No. 269003
>>268957NTA but same, I avoid femmes like the plague. I'm GNC and my gf who was trying to fit into the femme side of things has become liberated from that shit after meeting me. Apparently she didn't really want to dress that way, was just doing it because she thought she had to… turns out she had this idea in her head that she looks male when not dressed a certain way and it's just not true. Very few women legitimately look confusing anyway, like Rain Dove who still looks female if you look at her for longer than a second. I'm still more GNC than her but I love that we don't give each other stupid gender related bullshit, that we can just self-express in whatever way is comfortable and appealing to us.
Thought of a silly red flag
>sends reaction gifs on discord/twitter/textIt's okay in an imageboard setting but people that send gifs on other social platforms are bound to be basic as fuck. Kind of like The Office fans I guess? I feel like it's related.
No. 269037
File: 1654714311182.png (223.98 KB, 540x529, popp.png)
i hate that dressing in alt styles is often a massive red flag i just want an alt gf who isn't a gender special or batshit insane please
No. 269176
File: 1654773976344.jpeg (457.71 KB, 750x815, 0AF9F35C-A58A-42F7-8747-1170C2…)
Xbox have “designed” a pride controller. the lesbian flag is hidden in the bottom corner and here is the stunning and brave lesbian they’ve chosen to represent the company.
No. 269177
File: 1654774100057.jpeg (78.26 KB, 347x297, 589927A3-C868-4D90-A528-113C41…)
>>269176the controller.
excuse potato quality i’m on work wi-fi but it’s not quiet who influenced this the most.
No. 269179
>>269177Lmao, not the trans flag being the biggest one and in the center. Xbox knows their target audience
Also, ignoring the politics, the design is very ugly. Doesn’t look like a professional did it it is just some rainbow puke all over
No. 269188
>>269176Lord give me the strength not to a-log.
>>269177If you shook this in front of me enough it'd
trigger a seizure. It looks like a queer vomited on it.
No. 269198
>>269012You're not for me in a dating capacity but I think you are charming. Do you, basic friend.
>>269177>intersex flag more prominent than the lesbian flag and repeated twiceWhy is that even in our fucking umbrella. Even trannies are gayer than intersex people.
No. 269209
>>269005I wish I had a gf (or wife) to call me her himbo. Your relationship/marriage sounds really cute, glad you have found each other!
>>269037>>269180I'm vaguely alt (I can't stick to a clear aesthetic) and masc, but I am indeed batshit insane. In the schizo tinfoil at 1 am way, or sperging, but at least bpd free.
No. 269220
>>269202Ok so I know what it's like to have this issue of feeling like I'm predatory so consider this the preface to what I'm about to say. I don't think you can blame your paranoia/internalized homophobia on children trying to relate to characters online. That's a you problem. I get that there is a disability element to this but there isn't anything actionable about what you said besides forcing people to stop head-canoning gays? You're better off working on your level of discomfort around being near women. Straight women generally don't give a shit about being found attractive by people who can't harm them. Lesbian attention (that doesn't cross a line like hitting on her when she already shut you down) isn't the same as male attention. We aren't gonna rape or murder straight women the way men do when rejected. You are not a threat. Think of it this way, does a straight woman feel predatory when she has a covert crush on a male friend? No. She's harmless and whether the guy is into her doesn't change that she's harmless. Lesbian attention is female attention. It's not predatory.
There have been discussions about this topic in the past threads so you may wanna CTRL+F some keywords and see what others have said on the topic as well.
>>269209My gf calls me a short king to tease me sometimes kek
No. 269223
>>269209same
nonny. blue (or green) hair. septum ring. friends think i have undiagnosed adhd i’m such a sperg. gonna be a pride next month like “nobody knows i’m a
terf”
No. 269248
>>269220>My gf calls me a short king to tease me sometimes kekyour gf is based
>>269223Oh I haven't dyed my hair. I can just slick back my hair and put on a suit to pass as a normie at work (I only get tattoos I can cover easily). I just have the eboy haircut. My style and music taste is all over the place: emo, goth, punk, metal, ska etc. I used to dye my hair and I used to have piercings, but I quit all that when I went to uni and had to be presentable to get an internship. I didn't exactly study something which is alt-friendly. As an old zoomer I look pretty boring in comparison to the average young zoomer "queer".
No. 269335
>>269273Let them try it. I'm a former boxer, still in shape and the only exercise those men get is beating their girldick raw. Nah I'm joking, I wouldn't fight a troon. It's social suicide and I've already been arrested for fighting a homophobic moid, if it happens again I'm fucked. Besides, troons are so unwashed I wouldn't want to get that close to one. The t-shirt idea just popped into my head and made me laugh.
>>269307>>269321I feel like I'm constantly on the verge of leaving this place because of the lesbophobia but I'd miss you nonas in here. Finding a community that accepts me as a lesbian AND a butch is hard but you ladies in here get it. I don't have social media but I want a place to sperg about my wife and complain about the issues I face being GNC. For me, there's no alternative as there's no way in hell I'm rejoining social media.
No. 269338
>>269335>I've already been arrested for fighting a homophobic moidgod this is why cops are fucking useless, always just protecting bigoted men
>Finding a community that accepts me as a lesbian AND a butch is hard but you ladies in here get it.I really look up to you and I love your sperging about your wife.
No. 269346
>>269338Well, I spent a night in a cell but the cops did let me off in the end with a warning so I can't really complain. CCTV and bar staff proved that the guy started it and he was already well known to the police for getting in fights. They didn't care about the homophobia though, they asked more questions about goddamn football as I was there to watch a match in my teams jersey and they thought it was a hooligan related punch up. One pig even had the cheek to say
"well you did choose to dress macho" when I had on a fucking football shirt and jeans with a leather jacket. You'd think I turned up dressed like the biker from The Village People with a dumb comment like that. Thank you though, you're far too kind. Don't look up to someone with anger issues, lol. As satisfying as it is to put moids in their place, it's not worth it in the long run.
To end my post on a positive note and sperg about my wife: we've got time off from work coming up and she thinks that we're gonna spend it at home chilling but I've actually booked us a holiday in Italy because I know how much she wants to go there. I can't wait to surprise her! I've been so self-involved lately with my work projects and when I was seriously ill she was my rock. I'm gonna spoil her rotten
and also cop some awesome Italian menswear for myself.
No. 269350
>>269335Never stop sperging, I love lesbian sperging.
Also I went to the pride thread hoping to laugh at some "queers" but it's a whole lot of homophobia in there, no thanks. Better for our mental health to avoid threads that invite that sort of content.
No. 269354
>>269346>"well you did choose to dress macho"The butch version of being told/asked "what were you wearing?" I swear it's common.
>Don't look up to someone with anger issues, lol. As satisfying as it is to put moids in their place, it's not worth it in the long run. I mean more that I look up to you because I've seen you impart wisdom regularly. You've been through a lot and seem to be in a good place now in many ways. Just really admirable. I'm already an aggressive fucker myself kek, but I luckily haven't gotten in trouble for it and managed to stay out of situations like that for years now.
>To end my post on a positive noteYou two sound like a fairy tale couple, legit made for each other! Have a great trip!
No. 269360
>>268842>finds it funny when you have stereotypically feminine traits or hobbies>derides you or is disappointed in you when you cry or show emotional vulnerability and intimacyGod if this isn't painful. I'm a butch attracted to femmes like a dumbass but the fact is that so many of them willing to date butches are just bihets treating us as diet male and expect us to be stoic daddymommies for them. I get that it might be "cute" that a masculine person likes something feminine but the joke gets old real fast, especially when it seems to be done as a way of genuinely attempting to assert control over you by humiliation.
>>269335>>269346I know wasting your time on a scrote isn't worth the jail time but you sound so cool,
nonnie. Your wife is a lucky woman. I'm too much of a wet noodle for physical fights but my girlfriend, a very petite femme, is the meanest bitch you could meet and she's made men fuck right off just by flipping on her foul mouth switch on kek
No. 269364
>>269346You sound like a very cool person lol, much love to you and your wife from me and mine.
>>269360That shit you said about the joking resonates so hard. I get made fun of anytime I reveal a 'feminine' interest or do a high pitched laugh because I'm supposed to exist as some kind of stoic rock caricature of a man at all times I guess? We had a friend over recently and she made fun of my wife for lying w/ her feet kicked up (like the slumber party pose). Like it was just light spirited joking between friends but it still annoyed me. Who cares it's comfy. Would manspreading on the couch be less funny? idk.
No. 269479
>>269354>The butch version of being told/asked "what were you wearing?" I swear it's common.Ugh, you're right, it is the butch version of that. It's far too common and I'm sick of people expecting me to doll myself up. I've got a muscular fridge body, I'd look like an MTF. Maybe I'm the real Kikomi, kek. Thank you though, you're so sweet. ♥
>>269360>the joke gets old real fastI know the feeling. I understand something like my fear of spiders is funny because even though I'm someone who prides myself on fitness and physical strength I will jump on the sofa at lightning speed if I see a spider across the room. I don't even like killing them, I don't wanna be near the fuckers. And yeah, it is funny. I admit that myself. But I've literally been shamed by a bihet for offering to sew up a rip in her jacket before.
"I thought you were a rough and tough bad boy" bitch I'm a three dimensional
woman who has useful life skills like sewing that everyone should know regardless of sex. Fucking ridiculous. People are often shocked by what a clean freak I am and how much I love cooking too. I guess I should apologise to tradthots for appropriating their culture, kek.
>my girlfriend, a very petite femme, is the meanest bitch you could meet and she's made men fuck right off just by flipping on her foul mouth switch on kekAs a tall butch I acknowledge that small femmes are the real fighters of the lesbian community. You NEVER piss off a short femme without at least getting your ear chewed off for it. If we went to war it'd be them on front line, not us butches kek.
>>269364Much love to you and your wife too! I wish I knew more lesbian couples IRL. My wife and I try socialising on bumble and the like with other couples but they usually end up being kweerios, swingers or some poor straight woman and her AGP husband. Hell world.
No. 269497
File: 1654869770764.jpg (424.56 KB, 1045x1306, 654323456.jpg)
Has anyone watched this yet and if so does it have any surprise troons? It looks like a lesbian Buffy fanfic and I'm cautiously excited.
No. 269502
>>269497Thank you
nonnie for posting this, I watched the trailer and am excited, yes it looks corny and very YA, but if it is with actual lesbians and isn’t some queer-inclusive alphabet soup abortion, I am sooo watching this
is it just me or the black family being monster hunters looks like a nod to Blade? or am I tinfoiling? No. 269510
>>269479>I've got a muscular fridge body, I'd look like an MTF. Maybe I'm the real Kikomi, kek.Same, I've joked before when AGPs try to "crack my egg" that I'm an afab transbian boymoder kek.
>But I've literally been shamed by a bihet for offering to sew up a rip in her jacket before. "I thought you were a rough and tough bad boy"Just a couple generations ago men were expected to know that stuff too. Farmers would even knit. In some ways we've regressed with gender shit.
>People are often shocked by what a clean freak I am and how much I love cooking too. I guess I should apologise to tradthots for appropriating their culture, kek.Nobody dares to laugh at Gordon Ramsey for loving cooking and wanting things to be clean. An older butch once told me we're not supposed to cook, which I didn't expect to hear. While it's an essential gender neutral skill, imo you can make cooking masc too, it just depends on who does it really.
No. 269517
>>269479>You NEVER piss off a short femme without at least getting your ear chewed off for it.I love my gf for that, I'm somewhat socially awkward and every time some moid tries to hassle us she's spitting fire before I even realize what's happening. It's amazing how she makes people back off immediately and would probably beat you the fuck up with her purse like a cartoon character if given the chance but she's super sweet and caring otherwise. Saucy femmes are my weak spot.
>>269497Ehhhh I think I'm way too old for this, it looks like something teenage theater kids would watch and be all "omg she's
totally me i'm a lesbian vampire too!". I'm glad lesbian relationships are being represented but I'm still waiting for one that has a GNC character and one that doesn't have a porny poster like this.
No. 269607
>>269510Kikomi club! We are AFAB boymoding sisterbrothers, kek.
>Just a couple generations ago men were expected to know that stuff too. Farmers would even knit. In some ways we've regressed with gender shit.I fucking hate the gendering of life skills like cooking, cleaning, sewing, knitting, etc. It's incredibly retarded and tiring to hear about. I've actually met an older butch who said that about cooking too, she also looked at me with complete disgust upon hearing about my hook-up with a mutual butch friend of ours and called me a "filthy faggot" for it. They're rare, but these dinosaurs do still walk among us. You can usually spot these women as they only date femmes and are very insistent that butches should only date femmes and vice versa. This might be a controversial opinion but these women are FTM's in all but name. They have the same archaic views on gender roles and will react negatively if you go against them. Yeah, they don't mutilate themselves, thank god, but they can still spread their harmful views to young and impressionable baby dykes. It's sad because I have some great friends who are older butches but it does make me more hesitant to talk to other ones now.
>>269517My first gf was a short femme and I have many happy memories of her going psycho on homophobes back when I didn't have the confidence to speak up and defend myself. One time in a club bathroom I got called a tranny and my 5'0 skinny gf had a much taller, older and heavier woman up against the wall just by yelling at her. She had ovaries of steel.
No. 269688
>>269514Good luck
nonnie! I guess it’s 31 days now? How did you two meet? I bet you have a bunch of fun stuff planned together
No. 270218
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Comments on a thread about needing more butch lesbian visibility in media. This is so fucking depressing.
No. 270245
>>270218Fucking ghouls, leave us alone! Butches going on T to hide out as men should be a sad relic of the past, like fucking martyrs or some shit. Like oh isn't that awful, thank god we can be ourselves now.
>>270244I don't know and it weirds me out, I understand liking masc women but as soon as they start bringing identity into it, idk, I just can't deal with it. I just wouldn't want to be with someone who hates themselves like that. It's different for detransitioned women, I don't know why. Being in the active throes of troonism is just a turnoff I guess.
No. 270247
>>270244It's different from what is going on at radblr, but the reason why butches are encouraged to transition in the lesbian community, is to get us out of the lesbian community. It's like an ultimatum, either femme it up and become like the rest or transition and fuck off, because we're seen as the only ones standing in between lesbian acceptance. Similarly to how feminine gay men are viewed by masc gay men. It's a whole lot of "I didn't become gay to date someone who looks like the opposite gender, I might as well date women/men then". This happened when polilez suggested that butches are "male-identified" and "gender traitors" for just being themselves. You have to understand that "male-identified" doesn't refer to identifying as a man back then, it meant looking masculine and having masculine hobbies. Polilez had their own uniform, which some mistake as butch, but it's more something from their hippie background if anything and is distinctly middle class instead of working class. They said that butches are chauvinists who oppress femmes, they put in effort to shut down lesbian bars, because they were projecting their past relationships with men onto lesbian relationships and decided that butches are "the man".
Polilez also started cultural feminism. While most other radfems were against saying that women are naturally feminine, naturally have feminine hobbies and feminine behavior, you know acknowledging socialization. Polilez decided that it's nature and that it's good. Which means that a masculine woman is automatically bad and trying to be something against her nature, i.e. "male-identified" even though she could literally say she's a woman. They said that butches were doing roleplaying, even though that wasn't the case anymore since the 40's and 50's, if anything it was often pushed onto butches. Then when polilez were done wrecking the lesbian community, they went back to men, had daughters who then started 3rd wave (liberal) feminism. They mixed the femininity = good masculinity = bad, sexuality = choice, woman-identified-woman "male-identified" together into the monstrosity we know today. Where hyperperforming femininity and "bimbo" is seen as an empowered choice to make, but being gnc is icky and you better transition before you taint us with that or become feminine like the rest.
The effects of this can be seen in magazine ads from the 80's and 90's even, where it's obvious regular lesbians started talking about butches like we're dangerous chauvinists who need to be avoided. Getting butches to transition is a strategy to get us out of the community. They want to get rid of the "mythic mannish lesbian", they see it as an image problem.
No. 270254
>>270218I figuratively want to kys myself after reading this. I've already felt like being seen as a freak all my life for being a GNC woman who didn't troon out and every time I manage to convince myself that it's all in my head I see takes like this.
>yeah cis butches are ok I guess but god the ones who get life-altering surgeries removing healthy tissue and poison their bodies with testosterone shortening their lifespan by decades are so hot!!! Just admit you want a man.
>>270247A very good writeup, thanks anon. I was actually pretty surprised to learn how much effeminate men are hated in the gay community and how much their situation parallel ours - GNC members are shunned, they often get in
toxic relationships with
abusive bihets because that's all they can get and end up trooning out as a last-ditch effort. It really does show how the GNC hate is universal.
>>270251Holy shit anon, glad you got out. The opposite happened to me, I really wanted to transition because I bit the "transition or start being a femme, you're making us look bad" bait bad but my girlfriend talked me out of it. I'm forever thankful to her for that.
>>270225We have nicknames based on our actual names that are the kind of "only we know what they are" thing, like you wouldn't recognize what the pet names are supposed to mean without knowing the origin.
No. 270291
>>270225My wife jokes that handsome is my MK Ultra
trigger word because I'll do anything if she butters me up by calling me handsome first. She's not wrong, kek. Other than that it's usually king, baby/baby girl or my initial. For her I mainly use gorgeous, babe or queen.
>>270251My bihet ex used to tell me similar things too; sometimes during sex which had the effect throwing ice down my boxers. Aiden chasers definitely exist because I've been a magnet for them in the past. Some times even in allegedly radfem spaces. Back in the day I was in radfem discords with women I met on radblr and I would get inappropriate comments like "hot" or straight up flirting after venting about my PCOS making me hairy and how being tall, muscular and butch on top of that makes life difficult and pushes me closer to trooning out. And I get it, I'm hopelessly attracted to butches too, but when a woman is talking about the societal impact of being a big hairy butch and how upsetting it can be, maybe
don't start hitting on her and treating it like a fetish.
>>270270I'm getting war flashbacks to those lists now and how I could play bingo on them, kek.
No. 270557
>>270547I think you are idolizing transition a bit too much and not seeing the actual downsides that will come with the medical transition. The effects of taking T in long term will be way worse than being hairy and will absolutely ruin your body + you have pcos which I assume will only make symptoms worse. So you sacrifice your body, health, social circle and wife to gain what? Have you seen an actually happy trooner? The only way they exist is by coping 24/7 by being terminally online alongside other degen transes and living in a fantasy land. I know Ellen Page is a tiny woman with a skelly body you many not associate yourself with, but just look at her now.
Nonnie, I do not believe one can become happier by transitioning; you may be miserable now, but going trans will just make it worse tbh. I know I may get dogpiled for saying this on here lol (and also idk how wise this advice is), but if you are so dysphoric maybe just become a pronounhaver without actually transitioning?
No. 270570
>>270557Oh I'm definitely seeing trooning out from a "grass is greener on the other side" perspective. Even with all I know about the reality of being trans from friends that have went on T, I still occasionally think "but it might be different for me!". I wouldn't say idolising as I can't stand most FTMs and I hate MTFs with a passion. Honestly? I probably won't do it. I have these bouts of dysphoria every few months and after a few bad encounters with homophobes on the street today I just needed to scream about it somewhere. There is no way I could look my sisters in the face and tell them I'm trooning out. Especially my 6 y/o sister who is a tomboy just like me, what kind of message would that send? That alone would make me want to 41%. You're definitely right about happiness too. They only achieve it by living in an echo chamber 24/7 but then you look at their pics and they're still dead behind the eyes. No sparkle of life, nothing. I hope you don't get dogpiled for recommending pronouns. I'm feeling very down about living as a butch woman and you recommended something that didn't involve going full troon cultist and most importantly didn't involve medical transition. I can't imagine going he/him tbh but I'm very thankful you replied. Just hearing someone calmly say "no, that's bad for you" helps because if I went to a doctor or a therapist or mainstream social media with these concerns I'd be fed lies about the wonders of trooning out. Keeping myself grounded in reality is the key to getting through this, I've found in the past. I just need to calm myself down and remind myself of what I want in life and the kind of example I want to set for my sisters. Thank you for the reply,
nonnie. I hope you have a good day.
No. 270576
>>270547Yeah, it’s uncomfy feeling like you’re not a guy but women still might see you as an outsider. I’m probably not as masculine as you, just recently i dressed in a way that’s comfortable for me and a teacher didn’t know which pronouns to give me. I called myself a boy and looked like one as a kid. It means nothing. You have to detach your sense of self from how other people are you, know yourself, know how to be alone, and that this mortal body is temporary, so focusing on how you’re perceived instead of the experiences you can have from this life is a mistake. Some people may call you a guy. It’s no biggie. And honestly, I don’t think gender is a feeling, but if you don’t care what people call you you don’t have to correct them. Live how you want. It’s just important that you accept yourself and don’t mutilate your body, because that’s the opposite of self love. Find women like you, I think i had a couple good role models of masculine women, so friends like that for you would help. Maybe you’ll be that role model for your sister.
Also I’m really proud of you. It’s hard to be different, it can be lonely and confusing. Being the version of yourself instead of the version people are trying to mould you into, whether that’s a good, feminine woman or a mutilated self hating ftm is brave. Loving yourself despite that pressure is really punk. I hope you stick to being yourself and keep telling your story for the sake of every other lonely butch woman, so that they know they’re not alone, for your wife and your sister too. Hopefully there’s more research into gender dysphoria as a mental affliction rather than a diagnosis needing physical treatment.
No. 270611
>>270576You're right, anon. This body is just a vessel. I remember an older butch once telling me to treat my body like I treated my motorbike: Keep it running, don't let it fall into disrepair. Treat it kindly, or else you'll suffer. Make it as pretty as you want but some people might disagree with your preferred style, but who cares? It's
your bike. It's still the insides that count most anyway, and ultimately it's just a tool to get you from point A to point B; and it's the fun that you have on the journey that matters. Not the vehicle you rode on that journey.
Another part of her metaphor was "let all the pretty girls you like it ride it to hell and back, but keep it clean and let a mechanic check it over regularly" kek. Sadly we lost this amazing woman to covid in early 2020 and I miss her like crazy. Especially on days like today. She actually lived partially as a man in the late 70's to be able to work in a factory and she was full of so much wisdom about lesbianism and your innate identity that I wish I wrote it all down. I actually have a good friend group of masc women and butches but due to my illness and then work stuff I've not seen them in a long while (maybe that's why I'm wound a little tightly about this stuff). I'm hoping to get the crew together for a camping trip later this year though, fingers crossed.
>Maybe you’ll be that role model for your sister.God, I hope so. I love my three sisters and fret about all of them but with the middle one being a tomboy I'm so scared for her future with all this tranny shit infecting schools. I gotta stay strong for her and show the other two that women can be buff, tall, hairy and masc dressing and still be women and have feminine qualities. To not to judge a book by it's cover and all that stuff. If I trooned out I'd be a hypocrite to them. I don't know about loving myself but on a good day I do quite like myself. Maybe I'll get there one day. With regards to dysphoria being looked into
properly I unfortunately don't think that'll happen 'til the tranny astroturfing slows down considerably. I hate to say it but I think it will take more deaths from puberty blockers and cross sex hormones for shrinks and the like to realise that they've fucked up. I do believe that we all have an innate preference for how we express ourselves; like for example as young as two I would kick up a stink and cry if my mother put me in dresses or something pink, at two years old I don't think I even had a grasp on gender roles yet so there must be something ingrained in me that makes me like that. I just don't believe in it the same way trannies do. It's like trying to run tests on why I like oranges so much - it's just a preference, we all have them and they're all slightly different. The problems start when society treats you differently for your preferences. The root cause for dysphoria in females is often rooted in misogyny (both internal and external) and sometimes homophobia, IMO. But it's not very profitable for big pharma to admit that so here we are. Sorry for the rambling reply but thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I really needed to get that outta me today. Take care nonna, have a nice day/night/whatever and a lovely weekend. ♥
No. 270666
File: 1655460401525.jpg (157.96 KB, 567x817, lesbian_aesthetic.jpg)
>>270611> I do believe that we all have an innate preference for how we express ourselves; like for example as young as two I would kick up a stink and cry if my mother put me in dresses or something pink, at two years old I don't think I even had a grasp on gender roles yet so there must be something ingrained in me that makes me like that. I have a theory about butch socialization, but nonnas get upset at me when I talk about it. They think it's just autism, but I think it's related to the sexuality you're born with in combination with some environmental factors, which makes the difference between whether someone grows up butch or femme. There's evidence that gnc is partially genetic, but it's usually linked to homosexuality, so it's difficult to know if it's really separate. Babies and toddlers aren't that stupid, according to Delusions of Gender by Cordelia Fine, socialization really starts from day 1. Kids that young do look at the relationships around them, gender relations subconsciously, there might be an inherent disgust towards things they've noticed that would usually make a girl or woman attractive to males. I've noticed that with bi women there is also a tiny subset which also leans to the masc side from a young age, but usually not as much as a butch lesbian. I know it's controversial though, because you get the whole "lesbian doesn't have a look!" thing and I don't have a ready explanation for why femmes end up the way they do. Though there are probably environmental and genetic factors for them too, it's interesting that the more progressive things get, the more common femmes are.
No. 270721
>>270628Oh, nona. You're so sweet. It's butches like you that help keep me sane. You're right about us being divided and conquered, now more than ever masc women gotta stick together. My wife sensed something was off with me last night and she suggested that we go back to basics and forget about identity and just focus on the sun on our skin. So we went to the beach today and man, she was right. It's so easy to get wrapped up in identity politics when people politicise your body against your own will. Taking it back to "sun on skin feel good" really helps in a strange way. I hope you and your wife have a wonderful weekend. I know life as a butch can be rough enough but when you're with another GNC/butch woman you can catch even more flak. It's like being double gay, kek. Take care, nona. Thank you so much for your wonderful reply. ♥
>>270666I think what you said makes a lot of sense. My best friend growing up was a gay guy and we were two sides of the same coin: From a young age we both rebelled against gender roles and were othered immediately when we went to our respective playschools. Like everyone around us knew we were flaming homos except us. Honestly I am not a smart woman, so I can't explain anything but there must be
something genetic. There absolutely are lesbians looks and mannerisms, just as there are gay looks and mannerisms. Stereotypes about lesbians and gays didn't just appear out of thin air. Of course the crueller ones were mostly the work of straight people, but there's no smoke without fire, if that makes sense. I understand peoples reluctance to look into homosexual genetics with regards to eugenics, but I think a lot of people overlook how for people like me, it would be a huge comfort to know once and for all that I truly was born this way.
No. 270791
>>270721I know what you mean about being double gay! Sounds fun, I love to swim and I also find nature very grounding. I'm glad we both have someone in our life that provides that anchor.
>>270782I see you anon! I'm glad you're in this thread with us even if we don't know each other irl. Even small connections are worth something.
No. 270991
File: 1655633408216.jpg (187.9 KB, 640x447, naomi.jpg)
I just looked at the photos from the local pride and everyone there had a greasy hair with men wearing anime loli shirts. Half literally looked like kids lost on their way to comicon. Why do queers insist on looking as ugly as possible?
No. 271060
>>270666>it's interesting that the more progressive things get, the more common femmes areTrue, but the more progressive things get the more common GNC straight women are too, which does solidify the idea that lesbianism does not have an inherent look or attitude.
>socialization really starts from day 1>Kids that young do look at the relationships around them, gender relations subconsciously, there might be an inherent disgust towards things they've noticed that would usually make a girl or woman attractive to malesPretty much. The less femininity and female heterosexuality are associated with one another and the less pressure there is on women to be attractive to males from day one the more lesbian femmes you will find (because femininity is less strongly tied to attracting men so there is less of an impulse to reject it in order not to attract men) and the more GNC straight women (because attracting men is less strongly tied to femininity so there is less of an impulse to embrace it in order to attract men).
No. 271090
>>271060>because attracting men is less strongly tied to femininity so there is less of an impulse to embrace it in order to attract menI was the butch posting about being dysphoric and I think you're right. Bit of a blogpost but my mother was a model, appeared in a few fashion magazines like Vogue, travelled all over Europe and went to America and mingled with C and D list celebrities in the 80's which in our tiny, shithole hometown in Israel is a huge fucking deal. Now, I am practically her double, albeit a lot taller. So the assumption from her and other family members was "oh, you'll be a model like your mother!" and I hated it. I knew I never wanted to pursue modelling and that I never would despite the pressure from my family. Another thing about her is… well… she was the town bike. Yes, I'm being mean but she emotionally abused me so fuck her. Anyway I saw from a young age that being a good looking
feminine woman attracted men like moths to a flame. I always wonder if that fucked me up a bit as many of her boyfriends were shitty to me and some straight up hit me. Yes, I was GNC since a young child but as an adult I'm a bodybuilder with Irezumi tattoos covering a lot of my body and I dress extremely masc. A far cry from my mother in her prime. Don't get me wrong I like the way I look. It took me a while but I'm actually pretty happy with my appearance, despite the dysphoria around being perceived as this freakish third sex. But I do wonder if I would be different had I not had such an intensely feminine and heterosexual role model. Is this all an intense cope for my rebellion against my preordained "destiny" as a so-called model? This shit makes my head spin. Maybe I should become a nudist so I don't have to think this deeply about goddamn clothing kek.
No. 271221
File: 1655751717690.jpg (219.42 KB, 887x900, ugh.jpg)
>>271212Sex advice time please
Love my gf but our sex life is not where I want it to be. She's always had an easy time with me because I'm good at being present and don't masturbate so I'm quite horny when I'm around her. Aka I climax easily before she tires out. I've started to give her more and more specific feedback during sex as we've begun to have sex more often and my sex drive isn't quite as sharp as it was when we fucked once a week. Anyway point is, I communicate about what I like, encourage her, I guide her hand if she's kinda off, adjust my hips to get the right angle, the works. I cum every time we fuck and it's not just her prowess, though she is good with her hands and mouth, but also my active efforts to engage my kegels and participate.
She on the other hand is the opposite of me. She's always had issues with orgasming with a partner and it takes her a long time to do so, if at all. Previous partners basically didn't really try to work on it with her, they just let her get them off instead and called it a day supposedly. While she's so active when servicing me, she tends to just lie there when I'm working on her. She often doesn't rock her hips much and she requires a lot of pressure in a super specific way on her clit due to her daily-ish use of vibrators. I can't really replicate the intensity of that stuff with my hands or mouth, it's just a super strong motor afterall. She also doesn't communicate and barely guides me in general, it's so hard to tell what's working and what's not. When I use the vibrator on her she still wants it wielded (kek) super specifically and it's hard to do it when I can't actually feel her on my fingertips. Plus even when I do get it right it's taking a long time, my hands begin to cramp because the dumb gadget needs to be used super fast despite how hard it vibrates. It's just a bummer in general.
She is very attracted to me
fluids prove it if the way she looks at and touches me didn't and when she finally does focus on relaxing she has a great time. I don't need every session to be perfect, sometimes she doesn't get it right for me and I work my clit while she fingers me and it's never made me second guess things. What I want is more of a balance, I want to be able to please her. I don't think she really knows her own turn ons maybe. I've asked her about it and she's always like "I dunno". I've brought up quitting vibrators for a couple weeks and only using her hands to readjust her sensitivity but there seems to always be an excuse for going back to vibrators within days. She says she gets mentally stuck on "having to orgasm" with me and it takes her out of it but I can't really make her more present. It's actually extremely difficult to work her clit the super strict (motion-wise) and hard way while multitasking caressing her and kissing her/sucking etc which I would ordinarily do to make the experience more immersive but like. Holy shit I'm frustrated. I can't make her focus, I can't convince her to quit the fucking toys, I can't even give much feedback on how difficult it is for me because it's gonna make her feel even guiltier about her orgasm problems. Feeling stuck and alone.
I love her so much but I can't stay with her for the rest of my life like I want to, if I can't solve this thing. I don't want to look at sex like a chore but it's slowly starting to happen. I feel like she's not doing enough to address the disparity between our experiences, maybe that's super shitty of me. She does way better when she's drunk but I don't want to go down the road of intoxication just to have sex. That sounds awful.
No. 271224
>>271221NTA but dude, your gf
has to stop using a vibrator every day. Like that's not a negotiable thing, she's fucked her clit up. My wife and use vibrator like once or twice a month because we're heard these horror stories about them. I'm gonna sound like a nofap bro here but masturbating kills passion, IMO. I think you should try and explain that to her and that if she really wants a good sex life she would stop being selfish and try this for you. Yes it's harsh but she's really self-sabotaging here. As for being a dead fish in bed and not moving… this is gonna sound harsh but is she bi? I've had multiple bi women just flop down and expect me to take them like a cavewoman and do all the work. They were also the ones who had burnout from vibrators. If so that's an issue with how she views lesbian sex. If she's a lesbian you just gotta talk it through and try to get her to talk about her turn on's and stuff. I've froze up a few times in the past, mainly with new partners. I'm super eager to service them but with my body issues and general nervousness I get borderline neurotic about receiving and makes thing incredibly unsexy. Honestly you just gotta talk through this shit and get her off the vibrator, or at least ween her off it, idk. After that she should consider going masturbation free because I do believe there's huge benefits to that. Good luck,
nonny.
No. 271231
>>271212what do you mean when you say 'dry spell'?>>271224
nah i think there's reason in nofap. i try to limit my tickle time to once a week/every two weeks, i think it makes me more go-getter and creative. everything you do is using energy so it makes sense. also this anon's advice is sound, if the anon with a dead bedroom is reading.
No. 271234
>>271221I'm not saying you're doing anything wrong but… Every time I had a really hard time reaching orgrasm with a partner it wasn't because of their technique, but because they didn't make me feel relaxed enough and also didn't really meet my emotional needs. And I needed really strong and specific stimulation to get off because I wasn't all emotionally there.
Maybe there is some emotional component, anxiety, or stress to this that you guys aren't addressing. I don't really think the vibrator is the problem, she's probably overusing it to make up for something the sex is lacking. Maybe she "doesn't know" because it's not a concrete physical thing she can tell you to do, but something more abstract
No. 271246
File: 1655760327155.jpg (53 KB, 591x652, morbin time.jpg)
>>271224>>271231OP again, I do agree with you both. I usually don't masturbate more than a couple times a month for two reasons: improve my sex drive and leave orgasm as an option for super high stress days where I need release. My gf is a lesbian like me, describes her exes as pillow princesses. Maybe it's really simple, she just never learned to be an active recipient because her experiences were with women who lie there while receiving. She did think it was interesting that I move a bunch when we're having sex, that seemed new to her. She says she doesn't have body issues and I want to believe her but she does come across as at least a little insecure about her looks despite being gorgeous, just based on some stuff she has said. I'm not gonna be like "No you
are insecure about your looks" when she has told me she isn't already, though. Even if it's true, that's something she needs to explore at her own pace.
I think I'm gonna bring up the vibrator thing again. I recall her sometimes texting me she masturbated because she got too horny thinking of me and couldn't sleep, maybe I can make more time for her and she can just use me instead of a clit obliterator.
No. 271249
>>271231AYRT, I seldom meet other nofap women as they usually think it's incel nonsense (can't blame them tbh it does have an image problem) but I find I'm also more creatively driven, a lot less lethargic and sex with my wife (also nofap) is much more spontaneous, fun and erotic. I feel like chronic masturbation just trains your mind to think of sex as more of a release, a means to an end if that makes sense. It's literally just about controlling your energies and directing them to the right areas but men had to ruin it and talk about magic fucking semen kek.
>>271246How long roughly does your foreplay last? In the past I've found that when I'm acting like a dead fish in bed more foreplay (optimally at least an hour) can make me move more as I become more turned on and desperate for action. When you're in a long-term relationship it's easy to just throw your clothes off and get to it but taking it back to how we were when my wife and I first hooked up has been key. Keep clothes on longer, wear underwear that makes you feel sexy, undress each other slowly, pay attention to every erogenous zone you can, compliment each other, tell her how much you want to please her, how much you want her, make out until your mouth gets numb, etc etc etc.
No. 271254
File: 1655763912494.jpg (75 KB, 640x635, e9e00ae5e3cb03e478e2d5b8ce1c0f…)
sorry for the stupid question but what does this meme means kek ?
No. 271257
>>271249Foreplay is something like 35-50 minutes, kinda depends on the mood. We're also basically constantly touching each other when we're not even planning to fuck, just in general. I'm more guilty of random fondling than she is tbh lol. The way I view sex is very much a slow-burn, when I don't masturbate and nuke my sex drive every interaction has the potential to be erotic. As you said, it's spontaneous and I love that it can come out of nowhere as we get carried away with touching. I'm amazed that my gf still wants to have sex despite masturbating often, her libido is certainly higher than mine even though I'm the one that cums easily.
I do spend time teasing her and she goes nuts which is when I eventually fuck her but basically "too much" time elapses in her view after a while fucking and she visibly just stops being a desperate mess in my hands. She gets more rigid and I can see that she's lost it, totally lost her flow. I guess she's telling the truth about taking too long and feeling bad about it but I do think it would get a lot easier if she'd just stop desensitizing her clit every week…
No. 271347
File: 1655831164115.jpg (Spoiler Image,138.08 KB, 574x842, asdgsde.JPG)
>>271305I don't identify as butch but I'm firmly GNC. I've always cared about fashion, even as a very small child. I'd refuse to wear certain outfits if I felt the pieces didn't go together and I've always loved jewelry. My mother dressed me in a gender neutral way some of the time, and I had totally feminine things as well like pretty dresses. I always skewed elaborate in my outfits, whether it be masculine or feminine presenting. Gender was not a huge deal to me as a child. After I started going to school my interest in feminine things grew as all my peers were getting attention proportionate to their feminine presentation. I wouldn't say I dressed super cute only to fit in, but the social currency was attractive to me and I also like putting outfits together regardless. Once I started to fill out in the hips and breasts I got a lot of very inappropriate male attention (not just from my peers either) and began to dress very masc, hiding my body. I tried very hard to look weird or unappealing in general, though my fashion had always been a bit out there before this masc phase too. In college I went back to presenting really feminine, again for the social currency. This time the feminine presenting was solely to fit in, to get people to like me. I never really felt comfortable with what I was wearing but I was so starved for validation that I did my best to work my hourglass figure. When I show my gf pictures of who I used to be she can't even recognize her. It's such a different vibe and in both our opinions it looks wrong on me lol. My energy didn't match my fashion back then.
Now I dress in a way that feels comfortable but attractive
to me. I still wear a lot of jewelry (but not bedazzled stuff, more alt) and I meticulously curated a wardrobe that has items that go together just right. I'm told I look gay and I think there is a bit of fulfillment in that, like it affirms that I exist to love and be loved by women. I "designed" my appearance according to what looks good to me but it turns out it grabs the attention of women who think like me so win/win. I don't shave or wear makeup, I only did those things in my earlier life because I was taught it looked "gross". I actually find hair attractive on women now and prefer bare faces.
I was never "girly" in attitude though, I've always behaved in a GNC way that made men antagonize me because I wouldn't fall in line with what they want women to act like. I never got shitty reactions from women though. Maybe it helps that I mostly presented feminine and was not out as a lesbian.
Pic unrelated.
No. 271381
>>271257AYRT, sounds like you're doing everything right then. You just gotta get that clit obliterator away from her! Godspeed, nona.
>>271374You're goddamn right we are.
No. 271410
>>271305Not butch but my gf is and I see her childhood pictures whenever we visit her parents house and she grew up very girly it wasn’t til she got to college (before we met) and she shaved her head and started dressing more masculine.
I think I went through a sort of opposite phase where I was a bit tomboyish as a kid and teen and ended up being a femme lesbian instead
No. 271500
>>271450>Which one of you proposed?I did. As a butch I know that sounds stereotypical but it wasn't the whole down on one knee schtick. We were camping, which is one of our favourite things to do, and we were laid in the tent watching the sunset and it was the perfect laidback way to do it, IMO.
>Did you deeply discuss marriage beforehand, or did you feel like you did not want to be married before you met your wife?I was actually engaged once before, but my fiancée died suddenly and for a few years I was really down on the whole concept. That was the worst pain I've ever suffered in my life and I didn't want to open myself up to that kind of hurt again. I didn't even want a long term relationship. But then I met my wife and the closer we got the more it slowly but surely awakened those feelings in me again. We fell pretty hard and fast and it was
sort of discussed in that we regularly talked about wanting to spend our lives together and we "joked" about wanting kids and what we would call our kids and all that kinda stuff. My wife said that due to my prior engagement she didn't want to talk marriage with me in case it brought back that trauma for me. I kinda sensed that she would feel that way as I would too if the situations were reversed so that's how I knew I had to be the one to propose.
>Did either of you care strongly about what type of rings you got?I knew my wife loved floral designs for jewellery from snooping on her pinterest and that she also liked her jewellery pretty lowkey so I got a custom made ring to look a flower with a diamond at the centre. Nothing too flashy but enough to show that I care. As for wedding rings we really weren't that bothered. It took us ages to decide between gold and silver but it wasn't through disagreeing with each other, just being like "I don't care, I just want the marriage, a ring is a ring" etc.
>How did both sides of the family react to you two getting married?What little family I'm in contact with were fine as I've already cut the homophobes out. My stepmother and sisters in particular were thrilled. My wife's father was really happy about it as he and I get along great (I also asked for his permission prior to the engagement as I had major feelings of not being worthy of my wife's love), her stepmother not so happy as she and really
don't get along so great but my wife doesn't really get on with her either so it was just like… meh. She had a few cousins grumbling that she shouldn't marry an Arab, why not a black woman, why are you still gay, etc etc etc, but we were having a small wedding anyway so they were never on the guest list to start with.
>And finally, was it legal to get married where you were, or did you have to go somewhere else?Neither of us were born here but we live in the UK where gay marriage is thankfully legal.
No. 271601
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>>271590I want a masc gf nonna don’t give up I’m searching for you.
No. 271625
>>271624Wishing you luck on the date
nonnie!
No. 271643
>>271638I don't know if this will help you
nonnie but I use to be an handmaiden and I changed so everything is possible. However, I think that you have much more chance to change someone who is more logical and science oriented in general. Or maybe a more "philosopher type" someone with an open mind, open to debate all sorts of ideas, so I think you should definitely try to look for this type of qualities in a potential partner kek! Good luck
No. 271734
>>271711I have a larger than average clit too due to PCOS, not measured it but, well, it's prominent. I know how you feel because it makes me feel like a freak too. Situations reversed though, would you care if your partner had a big one? I'm guessing no, right? Most women don't really care about it, at least from my experience anyway. I have brought it up before, usually when I take my underwear off I give them the stock "yeah I know it's kinda big" speech and I've yet to have a woman make a cruel remark or look at me like the freak I feel like for it. Honestly a lot of women worry about their downstairs. In porn you always see little clits, small, neat vulvas and little to no pubic hair. I think most women know what it's like to worry about these things and aren't bothered by any perceived "abnormalities". I agree with
>>271724 that insecurity is the more off-putting thing. Just remember that if this woman does react negatively or make a cruel remark, she's not worth your time. Women aren't made in a factory and we come in all shapes and sizes. It's nothing to feel guilty about.
No. 271743
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>>271624Bless nonna, manifesting success for you guys! I'm so jealous lmao
No. 271934
>>271711Big clit insecurity is common but don't even fret. You don't have to warn her beforehand, and if she's someone who actually enjoys sex with women she'll probably like yours because big clits are easier to stimulate imo.
>>271741Technically it's not "more" pleasure, it's just the same amount of nerve endings distributed in a larger area, which can be less pleasure if the partner isn't doing a good job covering the larger area.
>>271827>>271831Based. I don't identify as a radfem but I'm also very open about my politics in social situations. No actual lesbian really thinks trannies are women, they're all just pretending they do to appease the queers or some just have never been in the same room as a tranny and change their minds as soon as they do. There's a lot of propaganda about how neovaginas are "just like the real thing" and women don't tend to google if that's actually true, for instance. I also like to speak up about how the trannies around me tried to get me to transition to a man just because I'm GNC and how they resented my "cis" gf and openly spoke to me about how unfair it is. That changes minds super easily and it's all literally true. You can trust lesbians ime.
No. 271949
>>271934I'm
>>271831 and I don't identify as a radfem either. Though I have told trannies I'm a
TERF before because that word is like their kryptonite, kek. Honestly the radfems I've known IRL have mostly been too obsessed with being nice and how TIFs are poor widdle baby girls and they end up being about as useful as a libfem in the end. If you do not give these freaks pushback in real life they will think they're winning. You have to remind them that real life is different and that the general population will not play along. TIFs are incredibly insidious with their agenda and will try to garner sympathy from everyone while singling out any GNC woman for brainwashing. I've been told before that I'm "wasting" my body because I would pass well and I'm "practically trans anyway" because I'm a butch. These kinds of TIF do not deserve sympathy and I will not give them any.
No. 272038
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>>272032>How do you flirt with women?Rather badly!
No. 272045
>>272038noooo
nonnie please lmao
No. 272061
>>272044I like this, you assume even as the ultimate turbovirgin i could still have a chance.
>>272046Thank you, yoda of lesbians. I will remember this, it definitely sounds like it would world
No. 272063
>>272045Sorry, nonna. If I don't make bad jokes I will die. That said, as an autist I have found making women laugh is genuinely a good way to make them feel comfortable around you. My wife and literally
all my exes have said my humour was one of the first non-physical traits that drew them to me. Just don't make dirty jokes 'cause I once said that "I like your clothes… they'd look better on my hotel room floor" line in a bar whilst absolutely shitfaced and I got a glass of wine thrown in my face for it (which I deserved). It was red wine too! Fucking ruined my shirt.
No. 272066
>>272032>those examplesmy sides nona
Anyway I agree with
>>272046 , the non-creepy compliments like telling her new haircut or shirt looks nice and being genuinely interested in what she says by reacting and asking questions works well.
>>272063 is right too, jokes and humor are charming as long as they're not the dirty kind. When I was younger I used to make those raunchy jokes and immediately found out they make you look like a sleazeball and I hate receiving them myself as well. Save those for later.
No. 272195
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Tried dating again and I am not enjoying it. Everyone is into casual shit, hooking up with as many people as possible, open relationships and polyamory, and of course I had to crush on yet another (turned out to be) fuckboy(fuckgirl?) who's just playing with me and I can't admit it to myself or to others.
Getting a gf in 20never, rant over
No. 272205
>>272199It's dating apps, I don't know where to meet lesbians irl outside of bars. But I think it's a cultural thing, the place where I'm living is very "open" and the same issue was pointed out to me from another lesbian who moved here a year ago. Maybe it's not in the cards right now, maybe I just need more luck
or maybe I need to fix my taste in women, but thanks nona!
No. 272207
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>>271949>>271934I didn't realise radfem wasn't always synonymous with
TERF, I assumed it was because the RF part. Good to know though!
Curious, anyone from outside the UK watch Gentleman Jack? It sadly makes me pine for being a lesbian in 1800s. Occasionally they say weird things in the show though, like call her a man and she doesn't always correct them. I'm genuinely scared they're gonna go down the 'maybe she was a transman' route and fully commit to pretending lesbians don't exist.
No. 272213
>>272207>I didn't realise radfem wasn't always synonymous with TERFI know Aiden's rights are included under feminism of course, but IMO they shouldn't be allowed in the movement. They're female but they're traitors in same sense libfems and anti-feminists are traitors. It's part of why I left online radfem spaces. I'm only rad leaning but what's even the point of having FTMs join? I've been called harsh for it but you can't trust the fence sitters. I've seen them backstab before and go full troon,
TERF hater after months of trying to prove they're a radfem. As for Gentleman Jack I haven't watched it because lesbian tv programs usually suck, but plenty of butches are comfortable with being called by male terms without it being a ~gender~ thing. I'm butch and my butch friends and I often call each other brothers. It's just a "you are like me and we have a special relationship because of that" thing. It's not that deep.
No. 272337
>>272331>cishetHappy for you but for the love of god stop using tranny language.
>>272335Thanks! I'll check her out.
No. 272343
>>272342No worries, nona. I didn't mean it as an insult or anything. I just believe the best route is to not comply at all with their rules and lingo. I'm happy you had a good time! I've never really enjoyed pride myself as deep down I've always held resentment towards people who are unapologetically out, which in the past has come across as hatred. The one big pride parade I did attend years ago in Tel Aviv got interrupted by protesters and I ended up running from the pigs for punching one, kek. Trying again at a pride parade is on my bucket list though. Maybe now I'm married I can just be more… me. If that makes sense.
PS: if you wanna integrate here type "sage" in the email field when replying to people so you don't bump the thread every time as you can catch a ban for that.
No. 272345
>>272343Thanks for the sage advice lol
Ah yes, punching cops, a pride tradition. When we went back out at night I overheard some people arguing with the cops and getting aggressive since they blocked off a bunch of streets for no reason and people were pissed since it made navigating way more difficult.
Trust me, nyc pride is the only one I've enjoyed so far. After only going to pride events that are aimed at under-21s or under-18s it was such a breath of fresh air. Not that young gay people don't deserve it, but where tf do older gay people gather that isn't like… an AA support group. Being old enough to legally drink made me feel weird and out of place at my local pride.
I'd definitely go to NYC pride with your wife if you ever get the chance! It's huge, loud, fun, and is more about being yourself and gay than being proudly out and wearing a pride flag as a cape. You don't need to shoot rainbows out of your ass for people there to know you're homo, because why would you be there if you weren't?
No. 272560
>>272528The polilez witch hunt only really takes place online, but yeah sure it's excessive there.
>>272555Oh I've never had someone say this to me IRL but I would absolutely immediately tell them the comphet doc was written by a bisexual and that they are bicycling when they think they only like women, nothing more. They're just confused/misinformed since the LGBTroon community constantly lies about what's normal and what's not. If they call me a biphobe or heckin invalidator I can always out-argue them in their woke cred better than they can. Luckily for them I haven't crossed paths with any lesbian larpers IRL besides troons but I will absolutely call that out if I do.
No. 272564
>>272560It's happened to me twice IRL. First woman I'd gotten close to for about six months or so and when a mutual friend discussed having unsafe sex and we were telling her to get checked this woman casually chimed in "I get checked regularly now because this guy once gave me a really bad STI" and my friend and I just went completely silent. Totally stunned. The polilez started talking about comphet and how guys may be attractive but she's a lesbian now and we just changed the subject, not wanting to argue over it. I slowly distanced myself from her afterwards. The second time hurt because it was a GNC woman who I had known for about year and who I thought understood me as both a lesbian and a butch. I was lamenting one day about the comments I'd heard from co-workers about me and how it upset me to be judged constantly and she says to me, as coolly as if she was discussing the weather, "well, you did choose this life, the butch lesbian thing" that did erupt into an argument because I was furious about it. Thankfully I've had better luck with lesbian friends since then but the thought is always there meeting friends of friends and going to gatherings with new people. Have you got a link for the comphet doc? I've never actually read it as I didn't hear of the term until about three years ago.
>>272562Yep, radblr is crazy. IIRC one blogger did have an old DD/lg blog and was strongly suspected to be polilez and another one who was detrans used to have men send in dick pics for her to rate out of ten (I wish I was joking) and that kinda started the trend. Radblr was always a very
toxic environment though. TBH I'm kinda blackpilled on online communities as they all inevitably become full of drama and slapfights. At least on here we're anonymous so it's more of an even footing where there's no cliques or mean girls shit.
No. 272596
>>272564Here's the accursed doc
https://www.docdroid.net/N46Ea3o/copy-of-am-i-a-lesbian-masterdoc-pdf
>it's way more important to ask yourself if you can be truthfully happy with a man than if you’re attracted to them. Ask yourself if you can have healthy fulfilling relationships with men and actually wanna be with them.> if your attraction to men makes you uncomfortable, you may be a lesbian.So stupid. Only a bihet would struggle with this.
> it’s not fair that straight women can have “girl crushes” and straight men can have “man crushes” without anyone telling them they can’t be/aren’t straight anymore, so the reverse should not be applied to lesbians.Maybe this is wild of me but I'd consider any "het" who's got a real "girl/guy crush" to be a bisexual. It's actually very simple.
No. 272601
>>272596All of that is just jumping through hoops to make yourself a REAL ~
valid~ big gay and not a boring old bisexual. I know bicycling and bi attraction can be really confusing, but please let's not do this. "Febfems" have a similar aura, wanting to be validated by lesbians and not being like those other dirty bihetties. I don't mean the not having sex with men part (that's sensible and good!) bit making a whole MOGAI identity of it.
This talk got me thinking about my ex, who was quite butch and all, everyone saw her as a lesbian and that's what she identified as. But she did drunkenly have sex with men, many times! She also creamed her pants every time she saw that Stranger Things jock on screen. But she also got fucking upset when I called her bi. It was confusing.
No. 272610
>>272596AYRT. Oh this looks
awful! I'm gonna read it with my wife in a bit for a laugh. Will report back to grumble about it.
No. 272618
>>272610We only managed eight pages, kek. Holy shit I cannot believe people use comphet seriously now after reading this source.
>b-b-b-but movies about straight people made me like dick!Yeah? That's funny because I was never interested in those films. It's almost as if there's a fundamental difference between us. The commodification of "gay" and "lesbian" to mean "cool, alternative people" was a mistake. I'm sick of bisexuals on literally every social media platform writing essays on why it's a homophobic hate crime to say they're not gay. Yet ironically enough it's not biphobic for them to staunchly deny their reality and type up 31 page essays trying to prove that lesbians are attracted to men and that's totes normal. Good grief.
No. 272623
>>272618>movies about straight people made me like dick!Lmao I only now noticed that this is the "video games cause violence" argument word for word, holy fuck this is real bad.
> The commodification of "gay" and "lesbian" to mean "cool, alternative people"Seeing western libs talk about how homosexuals are cool and how they wish they were one gives me a serious whiplash since I have only been exposed to extremely negative stereotypes about lesbians; it is like communicating with aliens from another dimension. Those people are just stupid, imagine thinking "I think lesbians are cool therefore I am a lesbian" okay and I think dinosaurs are cool, what now?
No. 272625
>>272623NTA but
>SpoilerYES! It is so wild hearing westerners say that shit when lesbians and gays are still getting beat to death/imprisoned where I live. I don't understand how they can casually forget the horrors that homosexuals went through, and still go through in most parts of the world. How did this even happen?
No. 272627
>>272623>Lmao I only now noticed that this is the "video games cause violence" argument word for word, holy fuck this is real bad.Oh fuck, you're right! I can't believe I didn't pick up on that. I did notice the mention of fictional characters though, anything to defend having a husbando and reading pornographic fanfiction about him, kek. I relate to the whiplash feeling from hearing western libs talk about homosexuality (or anything, really), I'm mixed Arab, go figure. They talk about how white people invented homophobia and literally every other form of bigotry and when non-whites speak up about homophobia in their community you get radio silence. It's like they think that acknowledging that all races are shitty makes them a racist or something. They just baby non-whites like "aww you poor widdle colonised peasant, life must be so hard for you, I support you though did you see the positivity post I reblogged!!!" like oh my god
please fuck off. Sorry for the rant, the bihet manifesto is giving me tumblr flashbacks, kek.
No. 272814
>>272813Huzzah for
nonnie!
No. 272852
long time lurker, first time poster. I just went to a (female only, everyone there was on board with gc) lesbian retreat this past weekend and it was amazing. different from what I expected somehow but very healing and chill and I met so many amazing women of all ages. 100% recommend you to go even if you have to travel if it's as all possible for you; I'm in the states and there were women from all over the western half of the US there even though it was nominally a regional thing (I myself had to take a plane to get there). Being with only lesbians irl is so different from just being online in spaces like this, in a good way. If you're one of those recluses like me that's like, 'ugh, I should go to LBGT things and meet new people but they're probably just full of people with genders or TiMs and/or I won't be able to relate to the women there, and it's so much effort….': please, please, if you ever get the opportunity get out of your room and go to these things, I swear it's worth it. Sign up for Lesbian Connection, it's free and it's how you can find out about some of these festivals and connect with other women who are normies/gc. There's also nansheonearth, she's a rf which I know not everyone here is on board with but she constantly posts about women's festivals and connecting radfems regionally. There's also a gc lesbian zoom/discord group that I know about that women from all over the world (but mostly US, it is true) are in, cowboyjen on tumblr can tell you more about that and and she's also on tiktok & etc. if you're not on tumblr
No. 272874
>>272869Oh fuck off, reddit behaviour is aggressively gatekeeping the thread because a 100% on-topic post didn't meet your exact tone requirements.
>wahh wahh don't be too excited about stuff or ur a redditor I am very smart>>272852This sounds like heaven nonna, I'm happy for you. Did you meet anyone special?
No. 272890
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>>272852This came at the right moment honestly. I've been building a network of lesbians here in town but it's been an uphill battle all the way and I was considering giving up on connecting with other actual gay people because it's a handmaiden minefield… I actually used to interact with Cowboyjen and also dykemind on tumblr so maybe I should go back to that and finally go to a retreat. My gf accepts my views on gender which I'm grateful for but I just really don't even wanna fucking debate anybody anymore, don't wanna think about the gender shit. I just want to be in the company of other real lesbians and exist.
No. 273222
>>273138There’s /lgbt board’s /clg/(cis lesbian general)
There’s also L chat forum, but that one focuses a lot on celebrity gossip
No. 273496
>>273465in my own experience gay men have also belittled my trauma as a woman and even as a lesbian and let's not act like bisexual women are more likely to be sex pests than literally any kind of man but if i point this out i'm a mean "homophobe"
>>273492i agree with you, i just don't see how homophobia is a worse issue than misogyny. both are horrible but misogyny is usually more likely to be tolerated
No. 273497
>>273496It depends. If you're active in the "queer" community you often end up being harassed by troons, pressured into pretending to be sexually available to them to spare their feelings etc. Bi women just don't get the struggle of being a homosexual when it comes things like that. In that sense only gay people get what we're going through, straight people aren't pressured to date troons, it's just us gay people.
There is no oppression hierarchy at the end of the day, people are affected differently by different things. Someone who doesn't deal with working in a male-dominated field, with a feminist circle may think it's not that important to connect on misogyny because it doesn't take as much mental real-estate. For me the troonery is rooted in misogyny because gay men largely don't even tolerate transmen, it's basically only lesbians being bullied into bending reality to spare someone else's feelings. Thus, I avoid anyone who isn't a lesbian but everyone has different priorities. You can't just say they ought to care about misogyny more.
No. 273514
>>273497These days lgbt is about everyone but gays-homosexuals, i mean, not ‘bi’ women who call themselves so gay whilst juggling their nigel’s balls in their mouth. It’s nonbinaries, trans, aces, and barely any lesbians. I mean i can’t talk, i wasn’t alive to see the early lesbian scene, but it sounds like they went through a lot, so i have a lot of admiration for them. i hope to be brave, a good networker, and skilled with my hands so i can carry on their legacy.
>tfw we have yet to make another michfest