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No. 580159
Unsure if you're actually straight? Actually gay? Anything in between? Ask for advice here.
Also welcome are "late bloomers" who realized their true selves long after their teen years who'd like to share their experience and tell others what signs to look out for.
Please be kind to questioning anons, no matter how "obvious" it might seem to you what they are.
Thread #1:
>>153246Thread #2:
>>344673Thread #3:
>>430575 No. 581363
Are nerdy women like on here who are very horny for the male body outliers, or do most straight/bi women like this and a lot of them are repressed, low libido or just lying? On lolcow or other places full of female nerds women get very horny for men, but if you look at normie spaces (like reddit kek), there's a lot of straight women who claim they never notice or feel interest in men and just like their boyfriends as people and seem neutral or bored by the male form. I wonder if that's just a normal way for women's OSA to be or if they've all been psyopped or just aren't horny enough to realize what they like.
I know I am bi, but can't imagine ever finding a man cute or sexy or being excited by seeing his body. I can feel intense sexual desire just by looking at a woman I find attractive, women's curves activate my monkey brain and make me want them sexually, but this doesn't happen for men at all. For faces a male face never makes me get butterflies or feel infatuated either, that only happens with women.
I can only see men's bodies sexually in a purely utilitarian sense, like "yes he does have all the functioning body parts needed for intercourse, yes his body is indeed man shaped". It makes me not really have any "taste" in men because the aesthetic part of how beautiful or ugly they are does nothing for me either way. I don't get how you could enjoy objectifying them because it feels boring and a little gross to me, I've tried. This confuses me so much.
No. 581368
>>581363normie straight women who lust after men tend to be in gay/faghag type spaces, like gossip sites
reddit women are a peculiar brand of pickmes for ugly undesirable men
No. 581420
>>581411Yeah I know you're probably right about reddit women kek.
>When one catches my eye though Idk how to describe but I physically long for it, hugging/touching/smelling it and so on.That's so interesting to me since I never felt that way for a man's body even the few times when I was interested in one, I've only felt that for women.
No. 581502
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>>581466Yeah it's interesting, I'm not as smell oriented as you but one of my first memories of sexual attraction was sitting behind a very pretty girl in school and wanting really badly to lean forward and smell her more, and having no idea why I felt that way kek.
>I assume you are attracted to men in some capacity considering you said you are bipicrel is just some reddit incel scrote's rant that got posted on /ot/ a little while ago, but what it describes is mostly accurate for how I experience attraction to men. Whenever I've had sexual desires involving men I'm mostly getting aroused by the idea of me experiencing that kind of sex, and the man is like a prop making that happen and not interesting by himself. It seems pretty common for women but most of them seem to find at least a few men attractive or hot for real compared to me. OSA came later for me than SSA and I feel like it didn't grow in properly.
No. 581525
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Do you think dreams mean anything? I’ve recently been going through it as a “straight” woman who experienced an unexpected “exception” (who was unfortunately straight, hence heartbreak). I’ve been clinging onto my fantasies about her for a long time even though it’s been painful, but I realized over the weekend I had to let my passion for her go. I’ve had a hard time doing this because she’s the only woman I ever felt this way about and I didn’t want the feelings to end. I had previously thought about maybe trying to search for another woman I could be attracted to on an app or something, but I knew the odds were very slim. So this weekend along with deciding to let my crush go, I also decided to leave behind my pipe dream about finding another “exception” and accept reality. It was hard and depressing to make that decision but ultimately the pain of the fantasies and the hoping was too much after three years of it.
Then last night, after finally making the decision the previous day, I had a dream about playing a reciprocal game of cat and mouse with another woman. In the dream I wanted to kiss her but was also enjoying the game of will-we-won’t-we. It was exciting to pretend we didn’t want each other while secretly both being aware of the excitement between us. In the end I did finally get to kiss her, and then I woke up.
Why did I have this dream right after I finally made my decision? Is my subconscious trying to tell me something, or is it just the final throes of my delusions after I dealt them the killing blow? Is this the angel or is it the devil on my shoulder? Or is it nothing at all since dreams are ultimately meaningless amalgamations of waking thoughts?
No. 581544
>>581525If you enjoyed the dream yes, if not then no.
You're clearly bi nona regardless of how rarely you find women you're attracted to.
No. 581661
>>581525If you just dreamed once about a woman it doesn’t mean anything, I also dreamed of shitting myself once but it means something.
If you just fell in love with this exception you might be one of those bi women who will take any scrote that came crawling from the pits of hell but have impossibly picky standards for women. That’s my sentence, next.
No. 581734
>>581661I used to have a lot of dreams about my crush
and it might sound dumb but I regard those dreams as some of the happiest moments in my life. This was the first one about a woman who wasn’t her. It’s true that I have been attracted to many more men in my life. The problem is, I liked her so much more than any man I crushed on in the past. Calling what I felt for her a crush feels like it’s not even an accurate descriptor for how much my fantasies of her took over my life. I’ve never felt that way before and I think that’s why it’s taken me so long to let go, and why I’m so depressed. My feelings for this woman dwarfed anything I’ve ever felt for a guy. Due to that, now I’m not even interested in men anymore. So I’m feeling really broken and confused. I guess I’m finding it really difficult to imagine going the rest of my life without ever feeling that way again. Previously I was hurting myself by hoping for lightning to strike twice, and so I made the decision to feel a lot of pain now by shutting down that hope instead of suffering prolonged pain from searching and finding nothing. But then I had that dream and it’s making me feel like maybe I’m making the wrong choice. I wish I could be normal, I’m so tired of going through this. Sometimes I halfway wish I never encountered her because I would still be normal, but then even though that would mean I never would have had to experience so much pain, it would also mean I never would have experienced that kind of love, so I can’t really wish it away.
>>581549Did it excite you in the dream? How did you figure out what you felt in the dream wasn’t real? Sometimes I wonder if it’s all in my head and that’s why I’m going so crazy.
No. 581755
>>580159i really really wish i knew whether i was actually bisexual or not. i have no real life experience with anyone due to being ugly and autistic and poorly socialized as a child, and lack of understanding of my body means i have no idea how to masturbate or test what makes me horny. i’ve had a number of crushes on anime boys which is why i was pretty insistent about being heterosexual as a young teen, then pivoted into calling myself bi as an older teenager into gendie shit because you know how tumblr is about “”straight people”” kek, i wanted to fit in. but i never felt any attraction to actual moids or moids in american television/cartoons, something about their voices and personality and mannerisms were disgusting to me. bishonen anime boys were just better and for a while i also beat myself up over “fetishizing asian men” lmao. then in my junior year of hs i developed an all-consuming crush on my gendie TIF friend who dressed masc and had a cute short haircut and i was so overwhelmingly obsessed with her and thinking about dating her and having sex with her and also just her mind and sense of humor and laugh and the way she wrote. but looking back on those feelings now it’s hard for me to figure out whether it was an actual crush or me just wanting to be LIKE her because she was cool. i feel like my frequent fantasies of having sex with her or eating her out (which i then tried to shove down as much as possible because i felt ashamed “objectifying” a real person instead of a drawing) and then also the fact that i was such a deranged menhera about her ever paying attention to anyone that wasn’t me (i like frequently had private sobbing meltdowns whenever she appeared even a little bit distant from me lmao) indicates that it was real attraction but at the same time because my sense of sexuality was so fucked i have no idea if i was just misinterpreting my desire to be like her or something. i also as a kid had crushes on fictional women but just considered it emulation on a similar level and as an adult now i cant help but feel like the way i feel about these women is just pickme NLOG bullshit. i feel like the SSA women i know both in real life and online have an innate sense of what women actually like in other women and what’s scrote bullshit, and ive always felt guilty because my attraction to full female figures breasts hips etc (gnc crush in high school aside) feels like invisible personal moid pandering kek, like those women online who defend anime toddlers with tits or larp as lolicons for male attention. i’m not a lolicon fucking obviously but i find unrealistic exaggerated female bodies attractive and feel a lot of shame about that it’s so scrote-y
i wish i just knew if i was actually bisexual or a straight woman larping. i need something that will just tell me definitively
No. 581759
>>581755>my frequent fantasies of having sex with her or eating her outI dunno, sounds straight as fuck. But really, if you're afraid of being a straightoid larping as a bishit, you can just play safe and call yourself straight regardless of your preferences and fantasies. It's not like you're dating a woman right now, if I'm not mistaken, so identifying as straight won't seem strange to others.
>>581757No, finding women's breasts, full hips and thighs hot is clearly a scrote thing and brainwashing by the media haha. We MUST make our preferences subversive or else the world will end. Trve and honest SSA women only find zipper tits attractive.
No. 581761
>>581759i guess the issue is that i’d love to be in a relationship someday, and would never date a man because if i was bisexual i’d be a febfem regardless. and i don’t want to accidentally string a lesbian along if it turns out i’m actually straight, but i can’t help but desperately want a loving relationship with another woman. it probably doesn’t matter though because I’ll die alone regardless lmao
>>581757i mean idk you hear lots of stories about how straight women get off to lesbian porn and i spent a long time convincing myself that was me and my attraction to pussy was just like a bizarre projection of my own desire to orgasm unhindered. but who fucking knows
No. 581948
I used to not believe in asexual shit until I realized I was asexual.
It sucks, and I'm still kind of in denial about it.
Most """asexuals""" are just kids who haven't had sex yet and are like "I'm ace because sex is ew gross icky!!" or people who want to have that """"special rare"""" sexuality label. It's dumb af.
I've had sex plenty before I realized and always wondered what the big deal was? Hell, I've even had "good sex" before and still was like "I could just get off by myself?" Lol
I had sex because I knew that, as a woman, it was basically expected of me. So I went along with it because it's "just what people in relationships do".
I'd like to have a partner, but it's not really feasible for asexual people, tbh (unless you are dating another asexual, ig? But the word "asexual" now apparently includes people who want to have sex LOL so go figure).
Here's why it sucks: if you want to be in a relationship, they're gonna wanna have sex. It's a bond thing, I guess. And if you don't have sex with them, they'll think they're undesirable and become super insecure.
It sucks.
But anyhow, if you're curious about asexual shit, feel free to ask, I guess. I don't speak for everyone, but I'll answer what I know for myself, at least.
No. 581950
>>581947Lol kissing isn't sex.
The desire for a bond / to get closer with someone ≠ sexual attraction.
Desiring to have sex with someone = sexual attraction.
Some people have to form a bond with someone before they start feeling sexual attraction, and that's fine, too.
No. 581956
>>581951Oooo you nasty.
What's next? Holding hands??
No. 581964
>>581950Nta. I wouldn't want to swap spit with randos that I don't find sexually attractive to bond with them or whatever. How would this even go? Two people that aren't attracted to each other at all will have to keep frenching until some of them suddenly be like "wow, now we've bonded enough and I'm attracted to them".
>Desiring to have sex with someone = sexual attractionI'm not sure about that. What about people who are cursed with cuck sexuality kek. Also, this line of thinking makes some women believe that they are asexual or lesbian because they don't want to fuck irl males for various reasons, even though they find males sexually attractive, have husbandos with literal cocknballs, consoom porn with males in it, and they don't even see any contradictions between their labels and behaviours.
No. 581966
>>581965Nta, but OP said
>does wanting to kiss someone count as sexual attraction?While there are non-sexual situations where people kiss (as with other expressions of physical affection), I believe wanting to, as in fantasizing about, kissing someone is an expression of sexual attraction. Do you often think about how much you want to kiss your friends or family members?
No. 582878
>>582827>>582837it's weird to me that you can't finish thinking about your supposed crushes, and don't picture a life with them. I'm 99% straight but for my one female crush who was my exception, I was losing sleep to the point of ill health giving myself many orgasms a night thinking about her, and I wished she could be my wife and shamefully even fantasized about caring for her while she was pregnant.
I do think I was crossing the line a bit from crush to creepy obsession but even still, you get what I mean.It's normal to think women are pretty and to want to be close to them because humans just like pretty people in general, it doesn't mean you want to fuck them.
No. 584276
>>583997If it's any consolation men have objectified themselves so much by objectifying me and other women that I struggle to see them as human. Kind of like "treat others how they wish to be treated" like okay I see moids as massive whores now. Basically I'm glad you're not a moid because you would be a misogynistic freak who would see no issue making sexual jokes every 3 minutes like a broken record (that shit gets old so quickly). Instead, rejoice, for you have a personality that can actually hold an in depth conversation and a brain that can provide intellectual stimulation to another woman. Also penis isn't all that interesting. Porn is the only time moids get to make it look appealing and even then their excretory object is not that powerful that it can make a woman cum, because clitoral stimulation is way more effective. Even on informal polls I've seen done on twitter or tumblr, women there voted oral sex as the most appealing sexual act they wish to receive. Last time I checked both women and men have a tongue. You come across like you have all these self doubts about your ability to please a woman, but you can get rid of those over time by having a relationship with one. You already have a great starting point because you were born female.
Also if this helps, one of the sexiest woman I've met was actually a very slim lesbian woman with a sharp ribcage that jutted out when she laid on her back. She said she also liked slim women for various reasons. We were incompatible in the end but who knows, maybe you'll meet her and she'll take to you?! Basically you'll be fine because there are delicate women 4 delicate women out there.
No. 584348
>>584323Here's why I think this post and a bunch of similar posts about how inferior girl/girl sex is are all a larp designed to hurt the self esteem of women reading this. The person you're claiming to be in this post is a woman who is attracted to women, right? As a woman attracted to women, I find it very easy to look at a woman's genitals and get excited about interacting with them. But you're claiming you're mad and jealous of men because women want to fuck men and not other women. If you were a woman who desired sex with other women, how would you so easily forget that women can desire sex with other women? It's like you forgot you were pretending to be a woman writing the post kek. However, if I met a real woman who said things like "interlocking parts" sex (such a sexy image lmao) was real sexy and female/female sex was "awkward and doglike," then her whole sexuality questioning issue would be simple to solve because it would be obvious she's straight. If a woman is genuinely sitting down and thinking "ugh I'm mad and bitter about what bullshit "awkward" "doglike" lesbian sex is" then she's probably not a lesbian or even a bisexual who's tragically hamstrung by how awful lesbian sex is. She's just straight.
>>584282I think the point of all the posts across multiple threads that say "I'm a True And Honest Lesbian but I'm frustrated and mad that I'll never get to have heterosexual sex with a penis in a vagina because I'll never be able to satisfy a woman like a man can" even though that makes no sense is that sex between real women is inferior to heterosexual sex with a troon.
No. 584392
>>584365>There are a lot of women who feel the way I doThe idea of there being these huge groups of women who are out there fucking women and feeling "extremely frustrated" by gay sex "because your face and hands are occupied and so you can't kiss her" is so funny. That is the sort of lie you tell when you are a 12 year old who does not quite understand how sex works, or I suppose when you're a man who will never understand what gay women like. But more importantly, since this is the Questioning Sexuality thread:
>It’s impossible to achieve the level of intimacy I want with lesbian sexYou claim to find lesbian sex disappointing emotionally. It's "extremely frustrating." It makes you "mad." You're "bitter."
>I’m also mad that women can look at their male partner’s genitals and get excited about how it will make their body feelYou claim to find female bodies disappointing physically. You say that women can look at male genitals and get excited, but women can't feel that way about women's genitals. Remember, you're claiming to be a woman, so if you were excited by women's bodies, you wouldn't find it impossible for women to be excited by women's bodies.
>I want to [do all these things that I associate only with] hetero sexIf these were real thoughts, you'd be straight. Even if you thought boobs were really cool, even if you were out there sleeping with women but then being "extremely frustrated" by the sex never quite measuring up to what you want.
Actually, congratulations: I finally believe that a woman could post this. This sounds like Closeted Heterosexual Fanny Perret logic.
No. 584416
>>584413I didn't skip any of that because I don't actually see one single sentence about being attracted to women, only a lot about how miserable it is to be incapable of satisfying women. In fact, this sentence seems to imply that women aren't ever attracted to women.
>I’m also mad that women can look at their male partner’s genitals and get excited about how it will make their body feelCan you explain how this makes any sense if you're attracted to women? Like, is it that you don't look at female partner's genitals or hands or body and get excited about how they feel? Or is it that you think you're the only one on earth who does that?
No. 584428
>>584421Yeah, I get that that's the claim, it's just that when you date women, you can easily spot the difference between the sorts of inferiority complexes women actually get about not measuring up to men vs. ignorant "how could a woman ever really be satisfied without a dick?" comments from straight people who just don't know what lesbians want, and in the questioning sexuality thread, I think it's worth it for girls who are actually questioning to know that if you're disappointed by the idea of having sex with women, that's a sign you are not sexually attracted to that gender, and if you're constantly fantasizing about sex with men and you think that's the pinnacle of closeness and intimacy, that's a good sign you are attracted to that gender. Intellectually wanting to be with women because it's woke or because men are gross isn't what defines our sexuality, it's about being turned on by and wanting sex with them.
I know a lot of people here are skeptical about women who come out as gay after having a high school or college boyfriend, but it's actually a really common gay experience to date a woman for the first time and find that the sex is emotionally satisfying, fulfilling, and arousing on a level that sex with previous boyfriends never was, and this is something that you encounter pretty often in the real world. It's not like a certain kind of sex is just inherently more satisfying for women–sex with men is only satisfying if you're sexually attracted to men and you feel that connection. That's why I think this particular derail is so glaringly fake. No. 584439
>>584430To be perfectly honest, I actually think that one poster's articulation of the frustration and disappointment, about how you can never be as close and as intimate as you want to be with the kind of sex you're having, sounds a lot like the way pre-gay realization women sound when they talk about sex with men. "Oh I'm just not a sexual person, sex is just never as satisfying or magical for me like the way other people describe it, there's just something undefinable that's missing" etc. Sex and arousal are very psychological: it's not about genitals fitting together like puzzle pieces, it's about truly desiring the person you're with. I think that other person who said she was a virgin could just be inexperienced enough to still not really understand her sexuality though. (Oh, the reason this is relevant to your post is because even if the logic is "I think I want women, but the idea of sex with a woman is just disappointing somehow, I get way more turned on by the idea of heterosexual sex involving a woman, obviously I'm gay but I just recognize how great PIV sex is, and no a strapon could never ever compare" I think it still implies an underlying disappointment with sex with women and speaks to a subconscious desire for heterosexual sex.)
No. 584447
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>>584442Yeah, I could see that nona. At the end of the day, it's a tif-adjacent fantasy to fantasize about sex with a dick, so I guess it comes down to whether someone is the hsts kind of tif or the super straight nlog tif (like picrel kek).
No. 584456
>>584453No, I think it's gay to love sex with women and have all sorts of fantasies about having sex with women. But I don't think it's gay to repeatedly say you're mad, bitter, and extremely frustrated that you can't have penis-in-vagina sex and to suggest that you will literally never be satisfied by lesbian sex by writing
>It’s impossible to achieve the level of intimacy I want with lesbian sexI genuinely do not think there is any way to be gay while also feeling that it's impossible to achieve the level of intimacy you want with lesbian sex.
No. 584457
>>584423I'm someone that has at a point in life (virgin teenager) fantasized about being a man to get with women while trying to understand sexuality, but it doesn't make any sense how you see pussy on pussy as something so complicated and sterile instead of extremely arousing.
>it will not feel much different from rubbing any other body part on the clitI'd say this has a lot to do with body type and experience, or even the amount you are attracted to the woman or the act. It's very different. Anything feels like just bumping parts if you are not into it (and I'm not saying you are a heterosexual).
No. 584461
>>584456i'm the anon and I know I said I wouldn't reply but it's like, holy fuck. So okay, your opinion is that wanting to be able to go in a vagina with my own genitals makes me straight. Let's say that's true. You're right! I am straight.
So what do you call a straight woman who has been, for example, sexually obsessed with another woman for years and masturbates only to thoughts of her? If there are a lot of other straight women like this, I would love to join a support group for pussy loving straight women.
No. 584463
File: 1751598463153.jpg (444.84 KB, 1575x2048, 1000082090.jpg)
Can I ask the low self esteem anons (I'm not sure who is who at this point): What's the point in saying "I will never be satisfied having sex with a woman all becuz I don't have a penits" when you haven't even asked what another woman even wants?
In my opinion if you're focusing on your fantasy over actually having sex with another woman then you're being selfish because you're not putting her first and instead putting your fantasy first. Also if you believe that all women desire moids and male genitalia then you're making assumptions about what other women think before they've even had a chance to speak.
What's stopping you from just talking out the kind of sex that would make you both happy at the same time?
Like personally tribbing is arousing. The feel of a woman's vulva hot, wet, and throbbing against my own actually makes me go crazy. The feel of our clits being in contact and applying pressure to one another is a very satisfying feeling, especially when we can feel each other both getting wetter together as a result. Manoeuvring to get into the right position takes getting used to but all sex is like that, you get to learn about yours and your partner's bodies. That's the appeal of being with someone you like. Nothing matters because you're both together in the moment and making love, essentially.
Why does a penetration fantasy suddenly ruin all that potential for connection??
No. 584466
>>584459For the record I totally respect and understand you and I don't think your original post was trolling or anything. My feelings and fears and so on changed a lot with age and time and experience and that's totally normal. like I distinctly remember being a teenager and thinking that fingering didn't make any sense at all because it didn't feel good to do to myself. some things about the way sex works and turns you on can't be reasoned through intellectually and you only find out through love and sex and dating. it's totally fine.
The thing is, I would have to hunt through old /g/ and /ot/ threads to find example posts but there is a very specific and distinctive tone of post that goes "As A Totally Real Lesbian, I'm SO MAD about how lesbian sex is HORRIBLE and I'll NEVER be happy" where someone will go on and on and on about how frustrated they are that they will never be able to satisfy or impregnate a woman because they don't have a dick and the posts read like they're straight out of the lesbian conversion fetish pages. It's really not the same thing as just not understanding something about sex when you've never had sex, and it reads as very deliberate and obvious. Your post was fine! The other post jumping in to say "yeah, I totally agree! lesbian sex will never be as intimate as sex with a dick will, it's literally impossible" was just too stupid to let slide.
But also, for the record, kissing and body contact and making out are a really big part of sex lmao and kissing is still really fun even when it's not actively happening at the exact same time as oral.
No. 584468
>>584463I don't find that description or idea arousing, no. I'm not sure why, because I fantasize about eating a woman out, about fingering each other, about watching her masturbate, about strapping, about licking her whole body, biting her neck, making out… but thinking about scissoring or tribbing does nothing for me. I would rather have her pussy in my face or on my hands. Maybe part of it is I am not very excited by clit rubbing and never have been, and tribbing is just like a more awkward way to rub your clit.
As for the "selfish" accusation, it's my fantasy and the other woman isn't real, so why would I be focusing it on the made up person's personal preferences kek? Ladies is it selfish to fantasize about things you personally like? Like what.
No. 584471
>>584461Idk but maybe it's the same thing that made the straight girl in this comic sleep with women even though she didn't like it
>>584447 or all the women who say they're lesbians and then call themselves gay men once they're on testosterone. If you think you're gay but you think gay sex is frustrating, unsatisfying, and will never measure up to PIV, maybe you really like the taboo of being seen as gay but you're not actually gay enough to enjoy the sex for real? Read a lot of fanfiction and think gay people are cooler than straight people? Really enjoyed Glee a lot? I just don't think you do love pussy all that much if you say it can never truly satisfy you tbh.
No. 584475
>>584471The entire point of the comic is that she never felt any passion for any of the women and was just going through the motions. Actual scenes from the comic for the illiterate among us:
>"I have never had a crush on a girl">"Kissing a woman doesn't feel right">"I can't feel anything for women">"I don't wanna sext with a woman"So you read that comic, and then read my post where I said "I have a history of being sexually obsessed and masturbating solely to the thought of a woman". and you decided those two things are the same…. somehow. All because I said I am frustrated I can't put my genitals inside a woman.
You're just bullshitting sloppily at this point.
No. 584476
>>584475>I have a history of being sexually obsessed and masturbating solely to the thought of a womanWait, aren't you the same person who posted
>It’s impossible to achieve the level of intimacy I want with lesbian sex? So masturbation is passionate for you but lesbian sex isn't?
No. 584485
>>584480my tinfoil is that anon fell for a unique type of
tranny and didn't realize it
No. 584486
>>584480Yes actually, although I'm a bit dramatic because I did have crushes on TIFs in the past.
>>584483I have seen 3 therapists, wasted thousands of dollars on it actually, and none of them knew what was wrong with me.
>>584485This woman has given birth so I think we can rule that one out.
No. 584491
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>>584486I see. since you love to make "I'm a lesbian who hates lesbian sex and thinks it's deviant and unnatural and I love straight sex and cock and pregnancy" posts (this is obviously you
>>>/g/548641 and probably this too
>>>/g/386335 and
>>>/g/388144) and that's a retarded thing to do, you can understand why it's really easy for other people to think you're a tif posting about how you want to be a man, or a tim who wants to inform lesbians about how great sex with a penis is, or a polfag or tradthot simply trying to disgust lesbians through constant cockposting and pregnancyposting. but since you're also the person posting about your hyperfixation on a mystery woman absolutely all the time, just maybe, maybe the repetitive phrasing and autist logic were completely genuine all along and you simply have a classic case of Sexual Autism, see picrel. In that case, I will never accuse you of trolling again if you just tell us who your sexual obsession is because I just know it's going to be so funny like kirbychan.
No. 584496
>>584491I mean I would honestly accept the autism sexual fixation theory except for this is a real human woman and not a funny shaped cartoon character. The reason I will not name her is because she's a D list actress in a random country and since I've sperged about her to people online before I would be embarrassed if they somehow discovered lolcow and found out I had this problem. That's all.
I would also accept any tips anyone might have on becoming attracted to men instead. I always keep the sexy man bodies threads, the sexy men you want to fuck threads, and the husbando threads open and make myself look at all the posts there to try to
trigger het attraction, but I just feel nothing when I look at their bodies (at best) or find the male bodies actually repulsive. I honestly suffer a lot in my daily life and I would like to be a normal straight woman.
>>584494>>584495Sorry I deleted to add more detail.
No. 584499
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Honestly browsing LC has made me doubt if I'm a lesbian. When I was a teen I dated moids, those relationships were always short lived and I didn't want to have sex with them and avoided it. Being around them felt exhausting to me and I always wanted to do something else, I had relationships with women and it was the complete opposite. I wanted to spend every moment with them and was always thinking of them, planning future apartments and what our future together would be like. My relationships with women were my longest and I was able to be comfortable enough to get sexual (still a virgin though). When I fantasise about having sex it's always giving or receiving oral from a women, the thought of moid sex is very scary to me. I see women as more attractive to men, even "ugly" women have many redeeming qualities to me, moids all look gross to me and many of them disgust me to look at. I watch anime and sometimes a male character sticks out to me, I don't think he's hot or fuckable, just cool looking and admirable. I rarely enjoy female characters, I think they look cute/hot but something just doesn't click for me. I can still like them it's just rarer. When I read over and over again on here that having men in your dating history or liking anime bishies means you aren't a lesbian I began to get confused. Aside from family members I have no males in my life, it's frustrating that I can't seem to figure it out myself
No. 584506
>>584501I actually am 2 weeks clean of looking at her kek. And I haven't talked to anyone about her in about a year and a half. That all might not sound like much but when you've had an all consuming sexual obsession with someone for 3+ years with multiple failed attempts to break out of it, it's actually big progress. My biggest problem right now is she still shows up in my dreams, all kinds of dreams from wet dreams to heartbreaking human drama dreams to random nonsense dreams. And when I wake up from a dream about her is the hardest time to avoid looking her up again.
>>584505I have tried to develop hobbies up to and including rock hunting through knee deep mud in waders for 6 hours by myself every weekend but even when I was faceplanted in the creek bed or fell down a railroad embankment or stuck in a bush for an hour and a half (don't ask) I was still either fantasizing about her or mourning my love of her. When something that extreme didn't work I sort of gave up trying to force hobbies.
No. 584507
>>584503Thank you, that epidemic ironically makes me feel more like a lesbian. My dating history and attraction is nothing like those people's and frankly I find them annoying too because they weasel men into everything
>>584504Not bait, sorry it came off like that. I am genuinely retarded and have a hard time trying to understand my emotions and put myself into words, just in general. I will clarify that I can completely empathise with those posters who say those things, they have every right to stand up for themselves. I'm frustrated with myself for being like a sponge and absorbing everything around me
No. 584513
>>584508You could probably guess this but I don't click very well with other people. I can do a wonderful fake personality that gets along nicely with other people, but real me does not. My one friend I made that I really genuinely clicked with had a family tragedy that happened weeks after we started hanging out and has dropped off the radar entirely and plus will be moving soon.
I can't make close friends with 99% of straight women because their relationships make me mad. I get along very well with gay women but they are rare since these days most are either trooned themselves or queer lgbtqia16253465+ activist types. I don't befriend men because they are annoying and untrustworthy. Aware this is a me problem but it's my natural constitution.
No. 584517
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>>584506Are you the anon with a crush on a Takarazuka Revue member? Anyways, I can relate to your all-consuming, crippling obsession towards another woman. It's painful and bizarre how someone you can never have, either because she's celebrity or fictional or just unattainable in some way, can have such a crushing hold on you. I could touch myself to her till I pass out every night, but I still won't get sick of her. My advice is to have an outlet for your obsession that isn't just masturbation. Draw and write about your feelings towards her. Heck, even make a chatbot of her if there isn't one already. If I get it out of my system for a bit, I can move on to doing other things that interest me. Maybe I'll start off by drawing her
and touching myself to her but then I'll get invested in improving my linework or composition. You might be trying to do this by venting on lolcow, but I think the key is to channel it towards something creative. We might just have a tendency towards obsession, maybe on the spectrum idk, so our brains will work a bit differently. Find a way to be inspired and work with the brain you have to better yourself and make life more bearable. Also, is your crush straight? That could be another reason why you're envious of PIV. If she's a lesbian she wouldn't get turned on by that and imagining what would actually make her wet is much hotter. Or think about it like, if she had a dick, would you still be into her? I think fingering, eating out and kissing and grinding, having your juices mix, the scent of her on you and vice versa…is much hotter.
If you yearn to be deep inside of her there's also fisting. I'm aware that not all of these acts directly stimulate you both, genital to genital, but a lot of straight acts also don't either. Honestly just focusing on making her cum would probably make me cum just from squeezing my legs. And think about how lame it would be to have to wait in-between because you have a flaccid, useless, sausage. With two pussies you could just keep going. There's also benefits to being of a similar size. Just fitting together better, being eye to eye to kiss her. It's much more erotic and romantic. Don't focus on what you can't do but all the things you can do, instead. And sure, this is from another virgin. But at least we know what we're attracted to. Who is to say we won't meet a girl like our crush in the future? It might be slim, but it's not impossible. Even if it never happens, at least we got to experience loving someone so deeply, though it might be at the expense of ourselves sometimes, it's a beautiful thing. I hope you find peace within yourself no matter what. There is nothing wrong with who or how you love, and nothing you can do about it anyway. So don't force attractions that just won't happen. It might be a more lonely existence sometimes, but you're not alone in the way you feel. I wish you the best
nonnie, take care of yourself.
No. 584669
>>584620Undeniably real attraction will contain the aspect of sexual magnetism. You are drawn to someone, you think they are very attractive but the observation of their attractiveness doesn't start and stop there, you feel a sort of pull to them. That's sexual attraction. This sort of thing can develop over time through exposure and bonding or it can be immediate or you can suddenly realize they're attractive and boom there it is. If you don't really have experience in socializing much or you're a sort of autist overthinker you will be confused about this. My belief is as so: if you're
wondering if it's sexual attraction it's probably not. If you're actually
scared it's sexual attraction then there's a good chance it is.
No. 584674
>>584654Sure. But there's a difference between confidently saying "I love gay porn and I'm gay," lying/being in denial and saying "I love gay porn but I'm straight," and saying "I think I might be bisexual, but I can't tell if I'm really attracted or if I just think girls are pretty, and something about lesbian sex feels disappointing, and when I fantasize about women I fantasize about them having straight sex, and I don't know if I could ever date one for real, and the draw isn't so strong that I'm willing to ask them out, but I ruminate on the topic unproductively because I spend a lot of time alone on the internet where people talk about this" which brings us back to: if you want to date women normally, then it's probably real enough and if you are just caught in a weird upsetting mental spiral full of insecurity and confusion and weird caveats, you need to stop thinking about it so much
No. 584680
>>584669This is why I’m confused because I don’t feel that for 99.99999999% of women, but I have definitely felt that magnetism for certain masculine and boyish women and tifs. To the point I honestly avoid them because I get too nervous in their presence. Way more nervous in their presence than even attractive men. Which makes no sense. This will sound dumb but I always felt funny and heart fluttery watching Tig Notaro stand ups as a teenager. That sort of boyish woman. But I feel like if I was genuinely attracted to women I wouldn’t only feel sexually attracted to women with a specific styling. And I do think I might have a bit of OCD because whenever I meet a masculine woman that I don’t feel any attraction towards, by brain tells me it’s proof I’m straight and retarded. And there are very few boyish women around irl so my sample size is tiny which makes it hard to analyze and means most of my crushes are women I don’t know irl and only see online or celebrities
like tig notaro which makes me feel like I must be a faker. So then I try not to fantasize about boyish women because it feel disrespectful(?) towards real SSA women. Honestly typing that out I see how retarded and nonsensical I sound. I don’t understand myself.
No. 584951
>>584669I feel like this is what I’m confused about and autistically fixated on. For me it’s the other direction - I feel very attached and fond for some males in my life and when I was younger I labelled these as crushes (like 3 guys in school and a couple celebrities I got attached to) until I got older and realised how it felt to want to have sex with someone (girls/women). I was confused because even though I fantasised about hugging the boys I liked and it made me nervous/happy I had never had any desire for sexual acts, kissing, being called their girlfriend etc until I started feeling attracted to girls. I thought all straight girls had felt the same way I did about boys because
some feelings
were there. But I was shocked when I realised what people referred to as sexual attraction gave you a tingly/throbbing feeling kek and your brain basically forces you to go there. It made me feel like a pervert for a while because I didn’t know it was the norm.
Also made my BPD symptoms manifest, when I fell in love with girls. I also used to hate the romance genre because I never related to it, but then after crushing on girls I finally started understanding it… I could even imagine getting married and starting a family with a woman even though I could never imagine wanting a relationship like that before. After some years I started to wonder why I had never wanted this with males, despite the fact I feel like I can “love” then. (Yes I am also an anon that has stunk up this thread before haha, I guess it’s always the bisexual questioners in either direction)
No. 584985
>>584951I relate to some of this. Early on, I had crushes on both. I liked a male celebrity in my teens (but in my wet dreams he had a pussy.) I'm sure I'm bisexual with a preference for women. I'll only ever date women, will lose my virginity to a woman. I'm as sure of this as water is wet and the sky is blue. Women are sexier, prettier, understand me on a deeper level, my life would just fit so well with another woman. I imagined marrying my very close friend
that I had a crush on but got over but didn't have domestic fantasies about men. We all know how shit they are too, which for me is just another reason not to be intimate with them. When a guy I befriended at work started to crush on me I got the biggest ick, felt sick when he went in for a hug and didn't let him lol.
Which is why I don't even want them as friends anymore. All this to say, I'm still bisexual. There's a retarded idea of all sexuality being fluid in mainstream culture now, which justifies bisexuals labeling themselves as lesbian due to "compulsive heterosexuality." It's also saying in a round-about way that bisexuals must be 50/50 and if you swing heavily in either direction but have an exception, you're simply "straight or gay with an exception," when you're just bisexual. The only orientation that experiences fluidity or "bicycling," the only one that has exceptions, is bisexuality. This includes if you had a history of liking one sex but then only stay lusting/loving/pursuing the other till you die. People might call you a lesbian or that you'll go back to men. Still, I communicate my sexuality on dating apps or to others that ask simply by saying "bisexual only interested in other women." I'd say febfem too, if it wasn't attached to politics. Remember that even though our experience might look similar to lesbians, they never had crushes on men, or got attached to male celebrities, or felt that nervous/happy feeling from those fantasies. Once you realize this, you won't get so confused or have to fixate on it. And you can continue lusting after other women and dating them and not have doubts about your orientation anymore. Free yourself from ruminating on this and accept yourself as the kinsey 5 you are.
No. 585289
>>584985I get you. The thing that sent me into this spiral in my case was that there was never anything sexual to do with men in my life. Never any wet dreams, never anything sexual with men while imagining them with a pussy. Ever. I tried imagining the opposite - a woman claiming she was bi, has female celebrities or friends she’s gotten attached to but never felt sexual attraction or wanted to be with any woman, while feeling all that for men - I thought it would be weird in that case and I don’t know if I would consider her bi so it made me question. (Perhaps that speaks to our own perceptions and women who come here questioning bisexuality getting told they’re straight is a biased verdict, and they might really be Kinsey 2s if feelings of fondness, nervousness and/or attachment can be seen as indication of romantic interest even without accompanying sexual desire or desire for a relationship.)
But even though this tipped my world upside down I’ve always assumed I was bi since I knew what the term was, my whole life and I still haven’t told IRLs any different. I have been ruminating for too long of a time now never being satisfied because people always give me different answers, or just vague ones. I guess people just can’t tell you what you are. It’s better to identify as bi than identify as a lesbian tentatively and wrongfully and regret it for the impact it has on lesbians as a community. So I am getting past
my symptoms of ocd spiralling and posting here less than I used to. It has made me realise some things about myself though (some flaws psychologically too haha) and has been good reflection.
No. 585299
>>585292sorry for the rant. i'm speaking only of my own experiences (duh) but even when i was facing extreme internalized homophobia and wanted nothing more than to trick myself into bisexuality, i still couldn't actually touch a man. i could try to pretend i was capable of dating a man, so long as i didn't have to speak to him, or see him, or have him in my life at all really, so the mere thought of having sex with a man is on another level of unspeakable. i genuinely could never, ever have sex with a man as a gay person. i think i'd genuinely kill myself if i ever did, it's just so gross to think about.
thing is, i've a lot of friends who call themselves "gay" dudes but the common thread among them has been that they admitted to me that they aren't opposed to having sex with women, she would just have to be extremely, extremely masculine. they say that the pussy isn't the problem but rather the aesthetic. so like… i would say there is an equally minuscule amount of exclusively homosexual females and males on the planet, it's just that both women and men who have slept with both sexes are more likely to want men. i think
that facet of male-leaning bisexuality is learned, since there is a strong global culture of loving men, but i don't think SLEEPING with a man, putting his ACTUAL dick in your pussy can ever be a homosexual behavior, sorry. i'm more sympathetic if you're in a third world shithole or something of the sort but otherwise, i don't get it. even then i always imagine i'd be a virgin vestal type of woman who devotes herself to god to avoid being forced into partnership with a man kek, but that's just me.
i think the most nuance in this conversation comes down to what you mean when you say "lesbian". if you mean exhibiting
mostly homosexual behavior, then yeah, non gs are lesbians. but if you mean those who exhibit
exclusive homosexual behavior, then only gs are lesbian, because like i said, heterosexual sex is not a homosexual act regardless of the societal hangups. for most people's intent and understanding, lesbians are the former definition. which isn't an inherently bad thing, but it leads to confusion and a disconnect between "mostly" homosexual women and "exclusive" homosexual women and everyone else's understanding. as for it being easier for people to accept a non gs gay man's identity versus a non gs lesbian woman's identity, it's more or less because of the prevalent male-loving culture i mentioned earlier.
No. 585313
>>585300i promise im asking this in good faith, but then what do you think of "lesbians who self harm by sleeping with men"? if sleeping with the opposite sex can happen due to personality traits such as
not having a spine or even hating oneself, then would it make it so that continually committing heterosexual acts is like… fine? like idk where the line would be drawn.
No. 585343
>>585322it's not hypothetical, nonna. i'm asking specifically because i've heard this shit from real life women identifying as lesbians. by "fine" i didn't mean to imply it was politically correct i meant more so if someone could truly be an exclusively same sex attracted woman and also be sleeping with men simply because she's a retard with no self respect and with no attraction slant.
>>585338i don't know if i even disagree with you, i think it's just really really inconvenient for the rest of us who only participate in exclusive same sex activities. but that's a different topic. i appreciate the discussion nonnas
No. 585383
>>585343>i'm asking specifically because i've heard this shit from real life women identifying as lesbiansNta but I must politely ask you to use your brain. It's obvious those are bisexual women who hate men but are still attracted to them, and also that those bisexual women genuinely hate that they're still attracted to men because those women interpret their attraction to males as "giving males permission to degrade them" so they think if they deny their attraction to men they will be protected. It's child logic.
An actual self harming lesbian does hard drugs and sleeps around with women and if you try and get her to stop she acts hypersexual with you so you don't reject her, and I know that because when I tried to "save" a couple of lesbians like this, each one said I could use her body for sex. They will also have eating disorders and sometimes send nudes like they're trying to buy your attention. Maybe act upset if you don't reciprocate, or maybe act upset you if you DO reciprocate. They get easily
triggered but they never actually sleep with the opposite sex.
I'm bi for the record and have met several bi women who claim to be lesbians, they all have histories with abuse and believe if they smile at a man it's giving him permission to abuse her. It's literally a case of "claiming to be lesbian for protection" mixed with the lack of ability to say no because these women grew up as girls in a rapey environment so they are just constantly in survival mode and if they denied a moid what he wanted there was actual violence involved.
The alternative route for self hating lesbians is trooning out and possibly becoming a massive coomer who mods videogames and/or consumes a lot of porn, but these lesbians always rotate their interests around a female subject.
No. 585498
>>585365If you have crushes and sexual fantasies about women you are not straight…You could be forcing yourself to think those things, because you assumed you'd be interested in them, but it would be short lived because you can't force yourself to get off to those fantasies unless you truly felt attraction. My friends have "girl crushes" and it's easy to acknowledge women are beautiful, especially because our image is so sexualised. But it's a whole other thing if you're having real crushes on women where you fantasize about them sexually and romantically, touch yourself to them and get off to it.
I'm bi, and if you're wondering if you're suppressing an attraction to men, I can speak on what it feels like to suppress attraction, albeit to women. Personally, I always knew. It's not like I was unaware of my feelings. I just tried to justify it in my head by saying it's not real, stuff it down, over-exaggerate my femininity thinking it would compensate for it and would be vocal and engage with my friends when they wanted to talk about guys. But I'd still be touching myself and getting off to fantasies of sex with women and getting crushes on them. I came out as liking women at 23, but I knew long before that, I just didn't want to admit it because I was ashamed. It's possible your attraction to men just isn't that strong too, but there would've been some kind of hint that you liked them. If you think way back to when you were a kid and there was not as much shame, were you drawn to any boys or celebrities? If you haven't felt any of this and you're an adult, have socialised with men and women, I don't think you should expect yourself to start liking them. If you're nervous about calling yourself a lesbian because you have sexual OCD or something, then just call yourself bi or don't mention it until you start dating. I think you wanted this reassurance by coming here. Relax and go masturbate thinking of pussy whenever you feel unsure, kek all the best nona.
No. 585579
>>585574Do you mean that you can't feel attraction towards people you know in real life? Or that even depictions of real people don't do it for you? Can you get aroused by looking at pictures of celebrities/actors/unattainable people or just imagining a real human?
Sorry for asking too much question, I'm just curious about this topic.
No. 585713
>>585579That's exactly it, I've never been aroused by a "real" person, celebrities included (I even tend to find celebrities very boring looking). I cannot imagine myself as being sexual with another person, probably because I don't see myself as sexual in the first place, but it's probably because I'm too "old" to still be a virgin.
>>585590I don't think being an alien is bad, on one hand I'm glad i don't have to deal with relationship drama, but on the other hand it just feels very isolating.
No. 586104
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I'm gonna sound autistic and like a retard but I'm curious. I've known I've been attracted to women since I was young and consider myself a lesbian. I used to watch some solo soft-core, but I've never masturbated my entire life. In fact, I'd go as far as to say I don't really know what being "wet" or "turned on" feels like, and I've never felt the urge to start playing with my shit when seeing something that would typically make someone want to do that. I mean, I frequently daydream about going down on a woman or fingering her, getting touchy with her, especially fondling her boobs. I've never liked the idea of strap-ons because it's basically just a dick to me and I wouldn't like a girl to try and fuck me with one (and vice-versa). I am a virgin, and don't really want to have sex, but if I had to it'd definitely be with a woman. Other than that, I also like to think about living domestically with another woman or possibly marrying one one day (more so having a wedding than actually marrying). I can see myself with a girlfriend (and honestly kind of want one) but it's not really something important and I could go without one. I read yuri sometimes and often imagine myself as one of the girls in the relationship, yaoi is a no because I don't want to see two guys fuck. I've never had celebrity/fictional crushes on men and don't find them attractive. The thought of oral or having PIV sex sounds repulsive, and I can't relate to any moid/husbando sexual fantasies I see posted here, even if it's the woman in control or the guy being humiliated/objectified. Moid bodies do nothing for me and I find stereotypical male features (like muscles, short hair) more attractive on women. I can say a guy looks cool or cute but I wouldn't say he looks sexy or makes my pussy quake. I can't find the idea of dating a guy or interacting with them entertaining, even if I try my hardest to make it appealing to me.
The thing is, I've been kind of obsessed with this anime character who's canon gender is iffy but almost everyone in the fandom sees them (as in he/she) as a male + it's somewhat implied they may as well be one so I kinda see them as such. Though they're commonly confused for a girl, I thought they were one at first myself, but I think of them as a woman in any daydreams. Technically, they could be either since they are not human and can take on any form, but I imagine them only with a female body.
Other than them, I've always had crushes on female characters, especially those who are/look boyish or androgynous (think Naoto and Kino), but this character's the only "guy" I've ever fixated on. I can't really think of them sexually and I don't think they have genitals, nor do i imagine them with any, but it's nice to think about them after a long day or whatever. I'd describe my thoughts of them as something akin to picrel. To be honest, I find the anons here that said they've came to anime characters absurd, they're so sexless to me kek
The character in question was written/created by a woman as well as voice acted by one (in fact, I find her voice kinda hot, so I've gone out of my way to find her other roles just to listen to her lol), so I guess you could argue they're made for the female gaze. I don't sperg to anyone about them and I keep them to myself as a secret. A lot of nonnies have said that 2d still counts, but at the same time this is just a one time thing and not sexual like other nonas relationships with characters, so I don't think it makes me bi or anything, but I wanted to know others thoughts on it
No. 587784
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I find women's bodies erotic and it's more than just aesthetic appreciation like for men, but when I am attracted to them it's like my brain short-circuits and I don't know what it is I want to do with them. Lesbian sex looks awkward but I don't really know much about it anyway. I'd like to be a man so I can have sex with them easily. In those fantasies the focus is usually on them, so I don't think it's AAP. I dunno
No. 588346
>>588214Yeah, same. Even when I thought that I was only into men and completely disinterested in imagining myself interacting with a woman sexually, het sex seemed extremely mid to me. When I was younger and more retarded I tried to fantasize about penetrative sex, because I felt that as a straight woman I had to do it for some reason, and it felt like chore. And blowjobs are a crime against womankind, I thought so even when I was forcing myself to be more open-minded n shit. Eventually, I stopped fantasizing about het sex and settled on just kissing, hand-holding, more platonic acts of affection. And even that bored me after sometime. Those acts also feel better with women, in my opinion.
Male bodies look kinda weird to me… They either look like skeletal cardboards or fleshy landwhales. Very few actually look attractive in photos, at the very least.
No. 589708
I’m
>>585289 and this picrel
>>586104 is basically exactly describes my feelings towards dudes my whole life. Kpop idols, like maybe 1 western actor, some male characters and some guys at school who unfortunately wanted more and made it awkward + made me question if I’m the weird one and just have some strange hang up. I feel it much less after my libido increased (I could be obsessive before, but not now) and pretty much feel like only concerning myself with women but even now I’ve gotten back into fandom habits and still recognise that same fondness I had before. But I even more easily differentiate that I completely lack sexual or romantic desire when it’s males.
No. 589784
>>589753I’m a lesbian and I second
>>589769 with the internalizing thing. I think certain aspects of my life would be easier if I’m partnered with another lesbian just because we would both relate to one another in specific ways bi women won’t get (and vice versa for bi women with bi women). That being said, if I have real chemistry with someone I’m not going to give that up because of her being bisexual. As long as we’re both being communicative about needs and expectations it’s really not a huge deal. Not every lesbian irl is so anti-bisexual.
No. 589868
I just want to gain another perspective here. I recall when I was around 12 having a strong interest and attachment to a girl who my crush at the time was dating and the same thing happened later on when I got older another time. Is this me actually being attracted? Or am I just projecting? Or maybe envy of some kind and desire to wear their skin? I've dated women, experimented, never felt butterflies only a strong desire to stay in their life, go on dates and do nice things for them like buy them flowers, help them with chores and such. I have little interest in touching genitals with men or women. I have a low libido that barely showed more existence in my 20s. Persons elsewhere said I am probably bi but lean hetero.
>>587786I think this is me. I lean very asexual and have next to no libido unless I am ovulating. Only as I got to my twenties I realised what would interest me in having sex with any of the 3 guys I ever felt clearly noticeable sexual interest in. I have no desire for PiV. Always been horrified by it.
No. 590136
Does anybody here can only have crushes on fictional characters? People clown on this concept, but that's kiiind of how I function? Well, for now, at least. Btw it's not like I only want to fuck Kirby's cloaca and find anything that looks vaguely human repulsive - I'm normal in that aspect, but there's some nuance.
By the time I turned five I already could become turned on by looking at the images of women, but I didn't have a crush on anybody. When other women tell about their crushes on girls from kindergarden or school when they were really young I cannot relate to that at all. I almost feel bad when I hear others say that their lesbian/bi awakening was a crush on girl. I just became a gooner at five years old, this is my awakening kek. I didn't even feel strongly about older women I knew in real life when I was a child, even though sexual attraction to adult female bodies in general was there. To this day I've never had a crush on a real person, never felt sexually attracted to a person I know in real life. I can't even force myself to think of people I interact with in a sexual or romantic light. I don't want to fuck anybody, I'm already satisfied by daydreaming. I had husbandos since I was sixteen. Maybe because of that I cannot feel attraction to attainable people? Like, when I think about fictional characters I can feel warm and fuzzy, I want to cry because of how pretty I find them, tears drip down my legs as well, but with real people? I honestly dgaf. I find a lot of women I know attractive, but it's just a mostly neutral observation. I find all real men repulsive, but I also live in an Eastern European country, so how can even a super straight woman find them truly attractive lel. I like to fantasize about fictional characters that are played by actresses, but does that really count? I don't really care about actresses themselves - I'm here for the characters that they play. I guess I can become giddy when I think about random non-oversharing women on the Internet who barely post photos of themselves online, but somehow I developed a parasocial relationship with them - this is the most I can do. They're still quite unattainable, I can project a lot things onto them.
Anyways, it's not a big deal for me, but sometimes I find it hard to participate in discussions about sexuality because I experience it a little differently. For example, someone will reply to someone "If you can see yourself bulding a life together with a woman you're bi, if you can't - your sexuality was probably influenced by watching too much lesbian porn" or "If you actually fuck a man or woman and end up liking it, your attraction is real" and I become confused. What if I'm lowkey schizoid and I don't want to have a romantic/sexual relationship with anyone. Am I unironically true and honest asexual who's sexuality was hijacked by sexualized depictions of women and japanese pornographic cartoons. But what if I only like to fantasize about being in a relationship with a fictional character - does it count? I've seen conflicting answers from people who share the same ideology and view on human sexuality.
No. 590218
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>>590136I'm similar and it does count but even if it technically doesn't it's really a nonissue. Imagine it like this: instead of trying to put your eggs in a random person's basket who you don't even know you're designing your own sort of mental island getaway outfitted with the amenities and interesting hotties you want. Little guestwork. The "problem" with me is that I've come to realize that in real life I really just care about family and friendship. But in fiction? My…questionable tastes seem almost designed around wanting relief and escapism. I don't ever expect real people to make me feel whole or
valid, or to forget all of reality–on the other hand, I like it when my fictional crushes don't have to deal with the same problems regular people do or better yet, not even be human. It's…honest? Like it feels weird to obsess over a real person and treat them like a commodity like that, but a fake person feels fine to endlessly experiment with.
>>590145I have, platonically. I think it's more on a spectrum? Most relationships are pretty superficial or utilitarian, after all that's how marriages came about and a huge part of adapting to society just involves going along with expectations or social constructs, which can be advantageous, but it also is part of why so many people end up in insane or wildly incompatible relationships too. Most women won't even end up marrying a man that cares about her as a person or even cares about enthusiastic consent. I personally wish I could have more fun with people that aren't a close friend and connect to them better but I don't really think sexuality has much of a role in that.
No. 590361
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I feel like I'm playing a character every time I'm attracted to a male. Like I'm stepping into another woman's shoes. Subconsciously I try to act more receptive, partly because that's what I believe is expected of me, and partly because I couldn't fake actual attraction to men and touch them on my own volition. The person I am in default is nothing like that. I'd always prefer to take charge. When I play up a character, it's usually of a woman I feel attracted to. I'd rather fuck a complacent docile woman. I dunno if it's porny bisexuality, or my inner voyeur AGP or something else entirely.
No. 590520
>>590516>Do you get an urge to kiss / touch the person you like?Yes.
> Do you get nervous around them?If I just find someone hot, not really. If it’s a full blown crush then yeah I do.
What are you onto nona?
No. 590606
>>590516If I like someone, they're the only thing I think about.
More of a general message here but if you think you like girls, don't give up after one bad date. Some people just don't have chemistry with each other.
No. 590880
>>590875>fluids that come out of them disgust meFuck, I totally forgot about that. I'm a turbovirgin and when fantasizing about stuff that involved dicks I used to pretend like cum and other fluids don't exist and it seems like it unironically warped my perception of reality kek.
Anyways, I totally agree with you. Dicks are okay in theory and can look aesthetically pleasing, but in reality they're probably not great at all.
No. 590885
>>590871NTA but I don't like dicks on hot men either despite being straight
>>590884And this too. I'm not bothered by the way it functions in theory but the way it LOOKS is disgusting, no matter what shape/color/length etc. no matter how the man looks, the dick ruins everything unless it's censored. Even the "aesthetically pleasing" dicks posted in other threads remind me of weird maggots