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The site is back! Read about the how and why we were offline here

File: 1403571838491.gif (130.11 KB, 2850x1123, noggin.gif)

No. 2

Post all technical help questions and technical/feature suggestions here. This is the place to go if you're having some problem with the site or want to request a new feature.

If you have some non-technical issue, like wanting mods to do something or a suggesting a change in policy, please use >>1134

If you want to email me: lolcow.farm@gmail.com


Twitter: @lolcow_farm

Please bookmark the Twitter. Status updates will be posted there in the event of site downtime or other issues. You can follow the Twitter if you want, but be aware that this may harm your anonymity if your Twitter username or tweets you've made could be linked to your real identity.


Info

  • Rules: https://lolcow.farm/rules
  • Max file size is 20 MB.
  • Boards have unlimited pages and threads allow unlimited posts. However, all threads will "bump-lock" after 1200 posts. This means further posts will no longer bump a thread.

You can read more site usage information at https://lolcow.farm/info. If you are new to imageboards, please read it.

Post styling

*words* => words
**words** => words
***words*** => words
##spoilered text## => spoilered text
[spoiler]spoilered text[/spoiler] => spoilered text
~#words#~ => words
#<3 => ♥

No. 3

I suggest the next time you post a .gif it's animated.

Just kidding I love you

No. 4

Can we get a the hover quote text like Unichan has? Or something like 4chan does.

No. 5

Would it be possible to implement those little pop-out quotes, like on 4/unichan?
Where reply posts are listed, as well as quoted posts showing up when you hover over them?
If not, that's cool. Stamrose was like that as well, and it was livable.
Thanks for the new space, Admin.

No. 6

>>5
>>4
Looking into it.

No. 7

>>4
>>5
Done.

No. 8

After posting, could you make it auto-redirect back to the post we made and not the main board? Just a personal preference of mine, if no one else wants that it's cool.

No. 9

>>7
Looks gr8
thx m8

No. 10

>>7
Sweet beans, thank you! You are my favorite admin.

No. 11

>>8
This or auto-noko

No. 12

>>9
>>10
>>11
Added autonoko as well as automatic quick reply. Tell me how you guys feel about the quick reply.

No. 13

>>12
Nice. What activates the quick reply?

No. 14

>>13
Clicking a post number while quoting a post is one way. There may be a keyboard shortcut for it as well.

A lot of the current chan settings should be similar to 4chan's default stuff.

No. 15

>>14
>>14
Okay, yeah. works.

No. 16

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

No. 17

>>14


Nigga you fancy!


Can I add that maybe sometime in the future we can get a decent looking banner? That would be the shit, SR never got one for some reason

No. 18

>>17
Rotating banners would be ideal

No. 19

>>17
>>18
Sure. If any of you want to draw up or suggest some banners, I'll add them.

I guess ideally we'd have one static image at the top for each board, and then random rotating banners for every board.

No. 20

>>19
Image dimensions? I might try my hand at it.

Also thank you Admin <3

No. 21

Should I add any more boards? I want to keep it minimal. 2 or 3 total I think is good.

No. 22

>>20
Image dimensions for the top image can be pretty much anything. There'd be one different one per board.

For the rotating banners…let's stick to 300x100, like 4chan has, I suppose.

Also, you're welcome. :)

No. 23

>>21
2 is fine for now I think.

If anything was learned from boxxyforever it was that too many boards to start off can be bad.

4chan has the right idea about only creating boards if there's a need for it. Or for containment purposes.

No. 24

Its looking really great.

No. 25

I'm considering either modifying /b/ to have poster IDs, or making a new board that has poster IDs enabled. Might be useful when people want a little more assurance they're not talking to a samefag.

Unnecessary, or a reasonable idea?

No. 26

Can we have a sticky of everything PT?

No. 27

>>26
Right now it looks like there may end up being more than a few threads about her. When things settle down a little, and if this board is still being used by people, I could make it just a single sticky.

No. 28

File: 1403580183158.jpg (203.53 KB, 1280x960, 1388457998419.jpg)

>>19
What dimensions would you like them to be? I'll make one or two tomorrow after work. This place isn't kawaii enough. I need more kawaiiness when talking about our dear queen.

Thank you so much for setting this up, admin.

No. 29

>>28
300x100 for banners, please. Any dimensions work fine for board images: use whatever you think would look best.

I'll try and work on adding additional stylesheets, too.

No. 30

Yo admin chan when you add stuff to the site is that why I could be seeing a 500 server error? (sorry to keep bugging you.)

No. 31

>>30
It would appear the server is experiencing problems due to the heavy load, unfortunately. I'm trying to resolve it.

I may have to end up upgrading the server.

No. 32

Performance issues should be resolved now.

No. 33

I'm not sure if I'm just stupid but is there a way to make it so that when I f5 a thread it will stay on that thread and not go to the front/rules page?

Could that be done?

No. 34

>>33
This was due to the annoying frameset index page. I've replaced it with something nicer now. Should no longer be an issue.

Auto thread reloading should also be working okay now.

No. 35

Please tell me if any of you experience the issue of making a new post in a thread and then not seeing it until you refresh once or twice. I'm tweaking some cache settings.

No. 36

I had an issue and had to refresh a couple of times before seeing it

No. 37

video embed maybe?

No. 38

>>35
Yeah, that just happened to me. Made a post about 30 minutes ago (I think?) left the site, came back and didn't see the post until I refreshed.

No. 39

>>37
If you add this, please make it an option to click [Embed] like 4chan has and not auto embed. On CatieChan the threads filled with videos would often take a long time to load, especially on mobile devices.

No. 40

File: 1403647543988.jpg (26.91 KB, 271x294, habbening.jpg)

>>36
>>38
Changed some more things. Tell me if it keeps happening.

Clear your browser caches for this site first, though.

No. 41

>>37
>>39
Done. There's a box for embedding a Youtube video. Put the full link to a video there.

When displaying on pages, it'll just show the preview image. Videos will only be loaded when you click on the preview.

No. 42

I'm currently messing with the default stylesheet. Trying to make it look similar to SR's, with a bit of custom flavor.

In the mean time, I've added a bunch more stylesheets you can use for now. There's a dropdown in the bottom right.

No. 43

>>42
Unichan stylesheet maybe?

No. 44

>>43
Unfortunately that's easier said than done. SR and Unichan both use different board software, so I have to manually port the stylesheet over.

I'll work on it soon though.

No. 45

Can we have a kawaii design in an ironical way?

No. 46

Is there any way to add spoiler images? I know we don't have a ton of nudes right now but seeing that the images are fairly large thumbnails I'd be ok with spoilers so I don't have to scroll past a ton of nudes.

If it's not possible that's ok as well. I just thought I'd ask. :)

No. 47

>>46
Done. I may customize the default spoiler pic soon as well.

>>45
Yes.

No. 48

What should we call you adminsama?

No. 49

File: 1403771788627.jpg (43.62 KB, 620x465, 10-farmer-mchugh.jpg)

>>48
"the farmer" because he milks the cows for lol

No. 50

>>48
>>49
You can call me Old Macdonald. Or just admin.

No. 51

>>50
Cow Tipper

No. 52

Just wanted to say thank-you, Admin. You're the best!

No. 53

>>52
My pleasure. ♥

I will do my best to keep this chan alive and well.

No. 54

>>53
A-Admin senpai how can we bring more people here?

No. 55

Thank you admin. This board is great, better than stamina actually. No more captcha, linked replies, embedded vids. I love it!

Long live admin!

No. 56

>>54
On the old board I heard someone mentioning something about 'efagz'. I assume it's another lolcow website. Maybe the board can get linked there.

No. 57

>>56
Efagz is pretty much dead since years, it is a livejournal.

No. 58

>>57
Dude, efagz isn't dead–I'm a member there, there's still regular posting.

No. 59

>>57
Also a member there, it's been pretty slow lately, but definitely not 'dead'

No. 60

>>57
a lot of the efagz members where on staminarose and have been wondering what the hell happen, there was just a PT post today.

No. 61

Efagz is still active, but to be honest it's mostly full of sensitive cunts like PULL is. I think it's safe to say that most Efagz members are overweight since most of the time they pick on thin models to the fullest extent calling them bones and unfuckable and shit but the moment you call a fatty like PT a fatty, they collectively get their panties in a knot and go on about why fat acceptance is so """important""" lol.

Why did Stamrose go down again?? I heard something about a mod getting tit-twisted and closing it, but have no idea if that's true or not so yeah.

No. 62

>>60
Do you want to post a link to here on efagz?

No. 63

>>61
A couple of users from /cow/ made false claims and came on SR to say PT molested a 3 year old child. They also pretended to be a couple of guys who knew britfag. The claim rattled the board, PTNR also said PT babysat a child of that age, and people said they were going to call PT's mom/get interpol involved. The the admin shut down the board.

No. 64

>>63
While the whole ordeal was a mess, I think in hindsight the SR admin did the right thing. Her closing the board not only shut up a lot of whistle-blowers, it also may lull PT into thinking because SR is down we've given up talking about her

No. 65

>>64
Agreed, she first tried to get those trolls gone with closing the thread but they always would make a new one, there was no other way than closing the site to stop it.

No. 66

>>64
>>65

The admin was already acting like a cunt before those guys showed up, like bitching about new members, threatening to shutdown the site, insulting the members collectively when she sharted her panties.

And my God was she stupid, "I DON'T TRUST ANY OF YOU" "WILL SOME OF THE /COW/ MODS COME AND HELP ME WITH MY BOARD, I'M NOT A NECKBEARD AND I DON'T HAVE ANYTIME BECAUSE I HAVE A LIFE" lol asking the same site that trolled us to come mod the board. ~she sure is wise guise~

She sounds like she just got out of HS to be honest.

And it doesn't matter what PT thinks, she's still under a tight leash with britfag around. It's not like we're getting any damn content any time soon just because "GUYS SHE THINKS WE'RE GONE :D" So fucking what? We lost PTNR, was it worth it? The admin is shit and so are you if you think otherwise.

No. 67

>>66
I'm not saying we're suddenly going to get a flood of content. There's no need to go full momrant about it. SR's admin was no saint but at the same time she cut short what could have been a huge frothy mess.
PTNR is still out there. If you want her "damn content" so badly, go PM her on the board she most recently posted on.

No. 68

>>67

People had already moved on after the trolls came forward and admitted they lied with those silly little recordings. They weren't continuing anything.
The damage had already been done when they first came forward and people started talking about interpol, contacting her (skypeanon), and her mom if I recall correctly.
Her shutting down the site is the equivalent of closing the barn door after the horses escaped. It had nothing to do with damage control, it was just a tantrum she threw fran stylez.

She then went to say on Unichan that she didn't want the domain anymore and would transfer it to someone else because she lost interest in it and had #real life stuff going on#

Have fun licking her paranoid twat when she reopens the site though, you wont be missed.

No. 69

I have to say this, admin was caught lying a few times. The obvious one was when she said that all the troll postings belonged to one IP address. That was confirmed to be a lie on n0chan where these namefags came clean (P-Logic and Mirrorman).
The other time was when everyone was shitting on PTF on this one thread last year. I was one of the shitposters, with maybe two posts. The rest were done by another person or maybe more. She then came in the thread and gleeful exclaimed "A LOG A LOG literally every post here against PTF was from one single IP", which she then proceeded to pick an IP out and post it in the thread followed with the "I think PTF is a pretty cool guy blah blah blah don't talk bad about him"

She has also apparently been secretly banning people that pissed her off when she said that bannings would only happen if you violated her only rule, Don't Contact PT's Family.

So yeah, I have no respect for her.

Also excuse the run-on sentences.

No. 70

>>69

Yup, Admin also banned me as one of these "trolls" and said my IP was the same as these guys, just because I was posting caps of the Skype convo,

No. 71

I wish she'd bring stamrose up long enough to get the links to recorded tinychats and other videos. Love it or hate it there was tons of content on there that's not posted anywhere else.

No. 72

>>71
I agree, a lot of old content is gone into the void now. And if she doesn't want to bring the site back to life, she could at least bundle all the useful content and give to us.

No. 73

Not sure if this is the right thread to post this in, but sometimes Google Chrome has trouble accessing this board and is only able to access a cached copy. Does anyone else have this problem? I don't have a problem with any other webpage, just this one.

No. 74

>>73
This is the right thread. I tried to fix all of the caching issues about a week ago.

Are you getting a specific error message? Does the page say Incapsula on it? How often does it happen, and does a single refresh usually fix it? Has anyone else also been seeing this?

Also try to clear your browser cache and your DNS cache if you know how to.

No. 75

>>73
>>74
I use Chrome too but have never had this problem.

No. 76

>>74
So of course when I try to recreate the problem so I can let you know exactly what's going on and take a screencap, it works fine. Thanks admin, I'll let you know ITT as soon as it happens again.

No. 77

>>76
In all likelihood it was a temporarily bad link between the CDN and the web server. That means it should have a very low chance of occurring again. If it does happen again it'll probably be completely random. But if it does, a screenshot would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

No. 78

File: 1404801805427.png (18.23 KB, 1366x702, error.png)

>>77
Okay, I got it again a couple of times today. Pic related.

No. 79

>>78
I've had the same problem where it says the page won't open. It's happened to me twice today. I am on my iPod so I'm using safari.

No. 80

>>78
>>79
Thanks, looking into it.

No. 81

>>79
I don't even use Chrome but the site got loading issues for me sometimes too.

No. 82

For some reason whenever I click on pictures, instead of expanding they open up in a new tab?

No. 83

>>82
Small bug. Will fix soon.

No. 84

>>82
Should be fixed now.

No. 85

>>78
>>79
>>81
Please tell me if you get an error like this in Chrome or Firefox from this point onward. I changed a few things.

No. 86

Is there a hide thread feature?

3 sticky threads is too much for me to handle.

No. 87

>>86
I'm constantly getting a "Your request looks automated, post discarded" error and can't figure out what's flagging it.

No. 88

>>86
You can now hide posts and images. Above each image is a (hide) button, and to the left of that you can select [-] and [+] to hide or unhide a thread. I've also unstickied one of the threads.

>>87
Adjusted a few things, tell me if you still see it. The board software has very aggressive spambot detection by default.

No. 89

>>88
If only mcdonalds had this kind of service.

Btw I was getting the request looks automated shit then I just used another Web browser and it worked fine.

No. 90

>>89
Yeah, that's one way of fixing it.

If you see it happen again, one way to temporarily fix it should be to copy/save whatever you were posting, refresh the thread, and try posting again. You may have to go back to the main board page and click on the thread again to make sure it really refreshed in some cases.

I think people won't be seeing it anymore though.

No. 91

Can you put in a button to skip to the bottom of the thread?
It gets a little frustrating having to scroll constantly on my iPad.

No. 92

>>91
This would be a god send, admin-sempai

No. 93

>>91
>>92
Added. There is now a down arrow that will remain in the bottom right corner of your screen. It will fade out when you're at the bottom and will be clickable when you're not.

No. 94

>>93
Oh gosh :3
The admin listened to me. I feel so special.
Thank you

No. 95

Apologies for the outage today. Everyone should be able to post now.

No. 96

Site is telling me to "get out." Did I fuck up?

No. 97

>>96
Admin is testing some things right now as it seems.

No. 98

>>97
Thanks. I really like you, Admin-sempai…I felt bad.

:)

No. 99

Sorry about that. I was indeed testing something so I could properly move the incelblogger thread to /b/. The "get out" message was not for you or anyone else to see.

Should be fixed now.

No. 100

I've added better post timestamps.

All are converted to your current timezone. By default a relative timestamp like "5 hours ago" will appear. If you want to see the original timestamp, just hover your mouse over it.

Also, if you are from the US then the full timestamp will use the 12-hour clock and US date order. Otherwise it will use the 24-hour clock and European date order.

No. 101

>>2
i was wandering what format do the videos play in? i converted a .flv video to .mp4 and the site didn't recognize either extension

No. 102

>>101
They need to be in WebM format (ending in .webm). WebM is a new format specifically for web video and audio. This is the same format that 4chan supports.

You can use a site like this to convert to WebM http://video.online-convert.com/convert-to-webm

Alternatively, you can upload your video to Youtube and post the Youtube video link in the Youtube field.

No. 103

Still taking suggestions for banners or a site logo, by the way.

Banners have to be 300x100, logo can be of any size.

No. 104

>>103
Has there been any takers for the banner? I can fix something up if there hasn't been any.

No. 105

File: 1407642119592.png (292.14 KB, 500x344, tumblr_lmjz5haMLy1qk48wdo1_500…)

REAL TALK:

would you ever consider combining PULL with this site? Freeforums sucks ass and it would be nice to have everyone and everything in one place. I would be more than willing to help code, install, or otherwise just set shit up. There is also a lot of potential ad profit in that for you.

email me if this interests you: prettyuglylittleliar@gmail.com

No. 106

>>105
>it would be nice to have everyone and everything in one place

Nnnnoooo. This is a bad idea. Lolcow and PULL may have similar content, but exist for very different purposes. PULL sucks as it is with all its SJWs and self-promoters. We don't need that shit here.

No. 107

>>106
This. Lain, I love you but PULL is like a hydra at this point. Get rid of one SJW or idiot, several more will take their place and become louder. I think it's best we keep the forums seperate. If it weren't for the retards, I'd think it's a great idea but alas.

No. 108

>>105
Yeah no. PULL's full of SJWs and wannabe aidoru/living dolls. We have enough cancer here from Unichan m'lady fags. I'm sorry, but most PULL users aren't familiar with anonymous internet board etiquette. Their posts stick out like sore thumbs.

Love you as well Lain, but just no.

No. 109

If people want to keep this place semi-secret then I'd suggest the following.

1) Anonymise all links using something like anonym.to so that lolcow doesn't turn up as a referrer.

2) Disable video embedding so that lolcow doesn't appear in Youtube stats.

3) Might as well tell robots to noindex to prevent lolcow from appearing easily in search results.

No. 110

>>105


Really Lain, really? Do you think that your silly little forum made of bitter, butthurt wannabe-snowflakes who flip their shit at the sole mention of a gasp fat joke would handle the shit we write here? Yeah, I didn't think so.

No. 111

>>109
The problem is that this site still gets indexed and when searching some snowflake's name their threads show up there and many snowflakes search their names 24h so they end here sooner or later.

No. 112

>>111

Google and other big Western search engines will obey robots rules. You can even use Webmaster Tools to manually remove links from the index.

The problem is sites like Baidu who don't give a fuck about any rules you set.

No. 113

>>105
PULL and this site serve vastly different functions and therefore have largely different userbases. Case and point being the no rules rules here and the shit ton of rules on PULL. It would be fucking terrible if the sites were merged. Random visitors from PULL can't even lurk and not namefag/trip, it'd be horrific if they moved over en masse.

No. 114

>>113
Agreed, lolcow is more talking and PULL is more finding/archiving/discussing proof.

No. 115

>>113

Christ can you imagine if they merged tonight? The next morning there would be like 5 "post ure dolly face ^___^" and "selfie shoop!!!" threads waiting for us positively oozing with pasty, acne covered weeaboo teens.

No. 116

>>115
PULL actually got a rule against this kind of threads since many months.

No. 117

>>115
You forgot about posts throwing a fit over namefagging (omh you guise stop homo-shaming!!11!)

No. 118

God no. It's bad enough some of those idiotic tarts derail threads as it is.

No. 119

>>117
So it basicly would turn into /cgl/ but without rules.

No. 120

>>117
Augh god, there will be copious amounts of that. Pixyteri thread? "You're fat shaming!!" and "I've never seen ghetto used in a Pixyteri thread but you use it for Delandra because she's black?!?!" Jessica Nigri thread? "You're slut shaming!!!! She should have the right to walk around naked and not get harassed!" Thread about some other shit? "OMG YOU'RE MARTIAN SHAMING!! YOU RACIST ASSHOLES!!!"

No. 121

>>119
One /cgl/ is bad enough…

No. 122

>>111
>>112
I can disable search engine indexing of threads if you guys want. I believe SR always had indexing on and I think people were okay with that. There are some advantages and disadvantages to it.

>>105
I sent you an email to discuss some options. As the others in this thread have said, it's probably not a good idea to merge the 2 sites into 1, but there are a few things that could be done. At the least, I could help get PULL off of freeforums.

Just to be clear, I do not intend on ever placing ads on this site or any other site though.

No. 123

>>122

The only downside to the indexing I can see is that regarding the Ostrenga situation it may potentially lead them here, but on the other hand they haven't uploaded any new stuff for a while and it's inevitable that we'll get found out eventually.

No. 124

>>104
>Has there been any takers for the banner? I can fix something up if there hasn't been any.

The banners will be rotating banners, so there can be an infinite number of them. They'll be like 4chan's rotating banners. Everyone is free to suggest or contribute a banner. In fact, the more banners we have, the better.

A site or board logo would be permanent and should probably only be done by one person though.

No. 125

Can we make some rules actually? SR anons contacting PTs family killed lols as did anons contacting OCs. Maybe blatant racism too? Idk what some anons problems with Mexicans is but its severe shitposting that derails discussions. Not even SJW I just find it idiotic and gross.

No. 126

>>125
Seconding. It's really stupid and constantly derails threads. Jesus Christ, there's some strong assburgers here.

No. 127

>>125
>>126
I'll strongly consider some slightly more strict rules if I can find a volunteer who feels they would be adept at objectively enforcing these new rules, as well helping to decide on what rules to establish.

If anyone is interested, please tell me. And if you want to talk to me privately, report any random post and include your message as the report reason.

No. 128

>>125
I'd like this.

Can we do something about unichan drama shit as well? It's starting to get a little annoying.

No. 129

>>125
>Maybe blatant racism too? Idk what some anons problems with Mexicans is but its severe shitposting that derails discussions.
That seems like more of an issue of spam. We shouldn't even touch the racism thing. What is blatant racism, anyway? You can't measure it, comes down too much to the admin's discretion which I don't like and I don't think she wants to make that call either. Spamming the board with inane bullshit is another thing entirely.

No. 130

>>129
It depends how the majority of people feel about it.

If anyone has any rule suggestions or concerns, please post them in this thread.

So far this board has been operating with essentially no moderation of discussion. All deletions and bans issued up to now have only been for Marijan.

There are pros and cons to moderating the actual quality of discussions. I'd like to see what people's ideas are before I instate anything new.

No. 131

>>130
I think when someone starts having a complete sperg attack just because they think they may be talking to a black, Mexican, or whatever on a message board, and is "triggered" into a sperg rage over seeing say a Mexican (or someone they think is Mexican, they should be given a temporary or perm ban and posts deleted because they add nothing of value to the thread. All it does it make people feel disgusted and derail the thread into oblivion.

No. 132

>>131
mayyybe. I mean spamming every thread like how there were is definitely annoying.

No. 133

I'm tired of the guy derailing the threads into MEXICANS ARE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH, and HOW DARE THESE SLUTTY BROWN WOMEN TAKE PICTURES OF OUR RETARDED WHITE WOMEN.

Like we get it, your ass hurts, you're poor, and no, you don't have to mention it in every thread faggot.

No. 134

>>129
I agree with this anon, if you make a "No blatant racism" rule you open the floodgates for people who think racism = power + privilege. It's just too difficult to fairly enforce something that comes down to mod discretion.

No. 135

I don't care about the racism, it's going to happen, but this unichan faggot cannot stfu about Mexicans.

Every fucking thread with a brown person in it or mentions a Hispanic person will make him go into a sperg rage and he'll derail the thread (BAW A MEXICAN SLUT TOOK A PICTURE OF PT WHO IS SOOO MUCH BETTER THAN HER).

No one gives a shit faggot, baww baww I live in a border town and the spics took over (you lying motherfucker). Border towns are poor to begin with and have ALWAYS been full of Hispanics from Mexico and Central America. There has never been one border town that was magically all white and then invaded by Mexicans.

You're a poorfag and you're mad you're stuck in a border town, go sperg outside. You should move to Detroit if you hate beaners so much, niggers are known for their hospitality and kindness.

All border towns are poor. I used to live in one, $900 for a 3 bedroom apartment at the country club. You must be really really fucking poor if you're complaining about poor Mexicans invading your poor neighborhood.


With that in mind, I don't suggest anyone living in a border town, it sucks and all the restaurants are Mexican. I mean I like Mexican food, but jfs some variety is nice.

No. 136

>>135
I'm pretty sure the person talking about Mexicans isn't from Unichan. Whoever they are they seem to be an old SR member.

No. 137

>>136
I spent a lot of time at SR and I don't remember ever seeing anyone freaking out about Mexicans, so I doubt they are from SR. /pol/ type behavior is more prevalent on the chans, so my guess is that this butthurt beaner hater is from one of them.

No. 138

>>137
I recall one retard on SR being super angry that Marijan confirmed he is a white European and not a "beaner" as they thought so it might be them. It wouldn't surprise me because holy shit, they needed to take their order of assburgers to go.

No. 139

As a Mexican myself, I honestly don't mind racist chan, mostly because people here seem cool and not racists.
So, he/she can sperg as much as he/she wants.
It does gets annoying tho.

No. 140

>>135
That was quite a rant. Do you feel better now?

No. 141

>>2
Requesting image hover in [settings]

No. 142

>>141
Also an auto update tick box.
Meanwhile, neat website.

No. 143

>>141
>>142
>Requesting image hover in [settings]
Looking into this.

>Also an auto update tick box.

Don't see the point of this. All threads auto update every 10 seconds. I don't really see why someone would want to turn that off or increase the interval, and a lower interval would be a bit too much for my server.

No. 144

>>143
requesting /x/ board.
instead of calling it paranormal, call it "x-files"

No. 145

Expand all images, and inline expansion toggle. And perhaps separate the meta into another thread?

>>143
10 seconds is a bit low, you could easily up it to 15 or 25. Not even 4ch x has lower than 30.

>>143
Tick box would be to let people save bandwidth.

No. 146

>>145
>10 seconds is a bit low, you could easily up it to 15 or 25. Not even 4ch x has lower than 30.
It is indeed quite low. I like it how it is though, and due to the way I have the server and application set up, each refresh incurs almost no additional load. It was 30 initially, and I eventually moved it to 15 and then 10 after testing. If this site ever gets anywhere near 4chan's level of traffic, then I'll probably increase it.

>Tick box would be to let people save bandwidth.

The amount of bandwidth used by a single client from auto-refreshing is minimal. It would only be useful for people who wanted to save me bandwidth, but again, there's no need.

I considered "expand all images" but I'm not sure if many people actually use that feature. Don't click-expand and hover-expand provide a better experience?

No. 147

>>146

just wanted to thank you for this website, really happy to find this place as anon again.

No. 148

Can you implement the option to view last 50 or last 100 posts since some threads are becoming really long.

No. 149

>>148
I'll look into it. Unfortunately, this board software does not support anything like that by default, so it will require significant modification.

No. 150

The page length itself isn't the problem.

1) The images take ages to load and because their size isn't fixed in the HTML or CSS they cause a repaint each time they load. Lazy loading images is probably the best solution.

2) According to the Chrome profiler there's some really slow Javascript calling querySelectorAll a lot. I can't discern more because all the JS is minified but it looks like it was written with no concern for performance.

No. 151

>>150

Actually it looks like #1 isn't true (but lazy loading could still help on mobiles).

The slowdown definitely seems to be JS. Chrome sends 7 seconds in querySelectorAll in the Jrcach thread. Also 2.8s in do_localtime.

No. 152

>>151
I'm aware of the slow loading Javascript. I optimized a few other things (like cross-thread post hovering) to skip processing all Javascript until absolutely necessary, but straight up loading a thread will still be slow.

I can tell you that performance was definitely considered. Believe it or not, initially it was much slower. I had to modify quite a bit of Tinyboard's default Javascript to make it faster. One thing I can't avoid is that some of the libraries I'm using (like moment.js for the time formatting I added) are very slow, and the time spent processing increases linearly with every post.

Client side optimization is definitely not my specialty. If you want to take a look at the unminified files, they're all here: http://lolcow.farm/js/

showOPLinks and do_localtime appear to be the biggest bottlenecks.

For threads that are under 100 posts, the Javascript processing time is pretty minimal, so a "last 50 posts" option will effectively solve the issue if people mostly use that. But I'll gladly take any recommendations for other speed improvements. Lazy loading for every post (not just images) might help, by distributing all post processing over the time period it takes for a user to scroll down.

No. 153

>>152

It's basically impossible to debug minified JS without a sourcemap connecting it to the original files. Most minifiers will generate sourcemap these days.


Going by the Chrome profiler in the Jrcach thread these are some of the slowest areas:

handle_images - one of the selectors is slow as hell or being run multiple times (or everything is running multiple times, who knows).

do_localtime - it seems to be moment() that is slow as hell. I don't really see the point of pretty dates considering the performance cost.

showBackLinks - not really sure. Probably due to the DOM manipulation.


The fact that jQuery is used makes things a pain as everything is littered with internal jQuery methods.

But overall I see a lot of DOM manipulation and think a lot of it would be better handled if the server output the desired HTML in the first place.

No. 154

Okay, after looking at show-op.js I realized it was doing a ton of unnecessary work. I could rewrite it, but I looked around and saw that quoting an OP is fairly rare (for obvious reasons), so I just removed the code completely.

I also made a few changes to the time handling.

There should be a small speed increase now.

The code for image hiding is really a mess, but I'll try and rework it a bit.

>>153
Personally I like the relative times, so I'd like to keep them as they are if at all possible. I know moment.js is really slow, so I'm going to look around for replacements.

I'm pretty sure 90% of the slowness can be found in http://lolcow.farm/js/local-time.js (which I don't think can be optimized much without replacing of the moment library) and http://lolcow.farm/js/hide-images.js

Moving things like image backlinks and related to the backend would simply be too much work for me. If I really had the time though, I'd probably rewrite this whole imageboard in something that isn't PHP, and with React for the frontend.

No. 155

>>154

Personally I find relative dates a bit of a pain after a day or so. Gmail has relative dates and it pisses me off (but you can get the real date from hovering).

It's OK when it says "30 mins ago" but "2 months ago" is just annoying when I want the actual day and time.

So only run moment on dates less than 3 days ago or something?

No. 156

>>154

The thing about hide-images.js/handle_images is that Chrome is saying that all the slow down is coming from querySelectorAll, which means that the bad performance is either all due to a bad selector or $('.whatever') being called a thousand times within a loop or something like that.

No. 157

>>156
Fixed image-hide.js. It should have negligible performance impact now.

The code was an utter mess. Whoever did the Javascript for Tinyboard clearly did not know much about it.

Note: Anyone who's previously hidden any images will need to go and re-hide them again.

Still looking into options for the relative times.

No. 158

>>155
You can hover over the text and get the exact date and time here too.

No. 159

There were some problems where certain browsers were being misidentified as bots and not being allowed to post. This should be fixed now. So if you've ever had trouble posting from your phone or elsewhere, try again.

No. 160

>>159
Thank you for all your help, patience and kindness farmer admin. I'm really happy with how functional this board is, it's much better than stamina ever was.

You rock!

No. 161

>>159
Still having it pop up on my phone but refreshing makes it go away.

No. 162

>>161
Should be resolved now.

No. 163

I'm sorry if this is just me being retarded but where did the Raven Sparks thread go? I can't find it at all and it was the best.

No. 164

>>163
>>12332
???

No. 165

>>164
whoa, thanks. I have no idea what happened, I havent hidden the thread or anything but it just didn't show up anywhere. Sorry for the hassle, and thanks again

No. 166

>>165
Hey anon, just wanted to let u know that it dissapeared for me too. Weird glitch I guess.

No. 167

not the same anon as >>163 or >>166
but for whatever reason I can't seem to find the Kiki thread

No. 168

>>167
Kiki is here.

>>82

No. 169

>>165
>>166
>>167
As far as I can tell, this sort of bug should pretty much be impossible. Some threads get bumped off page 1 pretty quickly, so next time you can't find a thread try checking the first 4 pages and ctrl+F for it. If you still can't find it, please post about it here and I'll look into it.

Thanks.

No. 170

>>169
Maybe a catalog?

No. 171

>>170
Psst, there's a catalog at the bottom of the board page…

No. 172

What do you guys think about the offtopic discussions?

The kiki thread right now is full of two people arguing about what body types men like or whatever, and it's so annoying. I literally can't read the kiki thread anymore because of it.

It makes it difficult to see actual relevant posts. A little banter here and there is ok, but when it's more than 20 posts offtopic, it's so annoying.

No. 173

>>172
They need to be taken to /b/. I'm sure farmer admin has a life, maybe more mods are needed to warn/ban the spergs? The mfc thread is getting bad too.

No. 174

>>173

Half of the threads here have turned to shit lately because of stupid offtopic crap…very annoying

No. 175

Maybe when threads reach huge amount od replies, start a part 2?

No. 176

>>175
this is a good idea. 1500+ post threads are difficult to follow, even if they are great for archival purposes.

No. 177

>>176
>>175
Would a "Show last 50/100" posts button work better instead?

No. 178

File: 1412915757942.png (158.68 KB, 400x371, 1407232910742.png)

Admin, you know what to do.

No. 179

>>177
Yes please!

No. 180

File: 1412965789870.jpg (20.27 KB, 1869x126, 88.JPG)

I just noticed this.
You are cool, farmer admin.

No. 181

I love you admin I want you to notice me

No. 182

File: 1413140693710.jpg (91.9 KB, 500x400, 291c8e01aab09085f722a22506a022…)


No. 183

>>182
I NEED THIS DOG!

No. 184

Added a few rotating banners.

If anyone wants to suggest any new ones (or if anyone dislikes a current one) please post in this thread.

If you want to make your own, here are the requirements:

Must be *300x100**

That's it. It can be GIF, JPG, or PNG.

No. 185

I love the new banner lol, it's perfect.

No. 186

>>185
There's more than one

No. 187

I'm still getting the "Post looks automated; post discarded" error every single time I try and post. Seems to happen if I let the thread auto-refresh and don't manually refresh it afterwards. Is this just me?

No. 188

>>187
How often do you typically leave the thread up?

Edit:

I adjusted a few settings. Tell me if the problem still occurs.

No. 189

>>188
Ah, typically I leave all my tabs open and just close my laptop. So 10 hours plus.

No. 190

>>189
That explains it then. You shouldn't encounter the issue anymore.

No. 191

Hey, I seem to be having issues with the forum being super slow. None of the images load, not even the thumbnails and the page is stuck on "processing request". I use chrome.

No. 192

>>191
Sorry about that. Are you still experiencing slow load times?

No. 193

>>192
nope, everything's back to normal! I don't know what you did, I didn't do anything, but thank you!

No. 194

Could you add something against duplicate images? Because it is getting annoying in some threads when people think they found a new image but it actually has been posted before.

No. 195

>>194
Could you give an example of where this is causing problems? Duplicate images are disallowed in the same thread, but allowed between different threads.

No. 196

>>195
It always seems to be the same person doing this in Yukapon related threads, like this was posted two times in her own thread
>>12702
>>17421
And her passport was posted at least 3 times, two times in the idol thread
>>18788
>>18799

No. 197

>>196
These all appear to be technically different images (different image dimensions), so there's no easy automated way of detecting them. If someone is posting the same image for no reason please submit a report. I deleted the duplicate ID photo.

No. 198

>>184

How can we contact you with banners? I made would and I'd like to send it to you.

No. 199

>>198
You can post them in this thread or email them to me. My email is in the OP.

No. 200

File: 1413941085500.png (60.37 KB, 300x100, harvestmoonbanner.png)

>>198
EDIT: Realised I was dumb.

Here you go.

No. 201

>>200
Well it's the right idea, but ideally it would have some sort of reference to the site or be humorous in some way.

No. 202

File: 1413943745235.png (40.52 KB, 300x100, harvestmoonbanner.png)

>>201
Alright, how about this, then?

No. 203

File: 1413948163602.jpg (25.47 KB, 300x100, huhhuh.jpg)

okay, my turn

No. 204

>>202
Getting there…

>>203
Why is the creepy doll on the right staring at me

No. 205

>>202
That's not really humorous. Maybe if you shooped the moon into Pt partially, and cleaned up the edges around the cartoon cow.

No. 206

File: 1414005493568.png (56.23 KB, 300x100, 879.png)

Here is my idea. I am not good at image editing so if someone wants to fix aspect ratio or fix the font, be my guest.

No. 207

>>206
Me likey! That and maybe add #savelogan?

No. 208

>>207
THIS

#savelogan

No. 209

>>206
Lol this is awesome

No. 210

File: 1414027359125.jpg (43.87 KB, 300x100, lolcow.jpg)

If the size needs fixing go ahead. Here is my banner.

No. 211

>>210
>Traci Hines and Doe Deere

I FUCKING LOVE YOU, ANON.
MY SIDES.

No. 212

>>210
You should censor OC's titties with elmos.

No. 213

>>212
THIS

No. 214

File: 1414040103257.jpg (44.99 KB, 300x100, lolcow copy.jpg)

Nice to know my work is appreciated. I couldn't decide which version I liked so there is this one…

No. 215

File: 1414040258567.jpg (45.11 KB, 300x100, lolcow copy2.jpg)

this one….(I found it creepy the extra elmo peeking from the bottom)

No. 216

File: 1414040590945.jpg (45.24 KB, 300x100, lolcow copy3.jpg)

And the final one.

No. 217

>>215
Thissss one.

No. 218

I got another suggestion for a banner, have a regular picture of oc, then put a picture of hers through one of those "you when you're older!" websites

No. 219

>No banner with our queen

Looks like I have some work to do when I get home

No. 220

>>219

wat…

No. 221

File: 1414048986457.jpg (69.17 KB, 500x699, tumblr_m7a2r2EBme1rbvxhyo1_500…)

>>220
u srs?

No. 222

File: 1414049138597.jpg (7.39 KB, 519x67, tumblr_mhd1i0yx301rbvxhyo1_128…)

not the right aspect ratio but I only have paint to work with on this computer

No. 223

File: 1414052997842.png (24.72 KB, 300x100, ptbanner.png)

>>222

Only the best for our queen

No. 224

>>223
I couldn't have done it better! You're the best, anon!

No. 225

File: 1414064040388.png (51.29 KB, 300x100, banner01.png)

I-I couldn't resist.

No. 226

>>225
That's absolutely glorious

No. 227

File: 1414078961657.png (20.36 KB, 500x66, pizzletizzle.png)

I have absolutely 0 shoop skills, so if anyone thinks this might work, have at it

No. 228

File: 1414081053604.gif (2.85 MB, 933x311, Untitled-3.gif)


No. 229

>>228
fucking perfect

No. 230

File: 1414098064829.gif (267.54 KB, 300x100, chocolate.gif)

>>228
Thank you anon!! Marry me?

No. 231

You're all doing God's work.

No. 232

Awesome banners. I added all the new ones.

Keep em coming.

No. 233

>>230
I love you so hard for this.

No. 234

>>233
It was >>228 that did all the work, I just resized it
But I love you too bb

No. 235

I hate to be a picky bint, but is anyone else bothered by how whenever you quick reply to a commment in a thread, you're automatically scrolled down to the bottom of the thread?

I find that really annoying, especially if I want to read a long thread, or some very old posts, I'll immediately lose where I was reading in the thread.

No. 236

>>235
Quick replies will now no longer scroll to the bottom of the thread. They will still highlight the post you made. Regular replies will also still scroll to the bottom.

If anyone dislikes this new behavior or finds any bugs, please discuss it here.

No. 237

File: 1414712926296.gif (21.34 KB, 450x339, graphics-thank-you-287568.gif)

>>236
Thank you admin-chan! You da best!

No. 238

Is a show 50 replies thing going to be implemented? These threads are massive and it's really tough to scroll through on mobile especially (but pretty bad on computer too).

No. 239

>>238
It's been on the table for a while now. Unfortunately it's kind of difficult to implement due to various reasons, but still possible.

It should be done by next week.

No. 240

>>239
admin you're spoiling us! Thank you so much though, we never had an admin this tech savvy before.

No. 241

File: 1414851485518.gif (415.43 KB, 500x287, Happy-and-excited-gif.gif)

>>236
I just tried it out and it works so great, I'm so happy!

No. 242

File: 1415000641777.png (54.38 KB, 300x100, banner1.png)


No. 243

File: 1415000701731.png (61.25 KB, 300x100, bannernig.png)


No. 244

>>242

Well deserved. Anon, you rock. Many internets to you sir.

No. 245

>>243
Lmao I love this one. Well played anon.

No. 246

File: 1415030066896.jpeg (37.02 KB, 275x92, sdsdsdds.jpeg)

To the anon that made this into banner format, hope my little fix (the r was hidden) is ok.

No. 247

>>246
It is. Thank you for fixing it.

No. 248

>>246
Could you (or someone) resize this to 300x100 please? It works okay as it is but I'd like to keep them all standardized.

No. 249

File: 1415056622618.png (79.37 KB, 300x100, thats so lolcow2.png)

>>248
I think I got it the right size.

No. 250

>>249
Thanks. On second thought, I may just keep >>20945 to avoid the image stretching.

No. 251

File: 1415136876416.png (41.03 KB, 300x100, 86533.png)


No. 252

>>251
This one is my new favorite

No. 253

File: 1415141931730.jpg (713.09 KB, 1149x962, Farmer.jpg)

Hey there farmer admin, some people in the raven thread have been asking for u

>>20952

No. 254

>>251
I love you

No. 255

Very temporary posting issue. Fixed now.

No. 256

File: 1415233296289.gif (2.28 MB, 350x197, Crying-gifs-10112013-01.gif)

>>255
I was scared that the site had gone down forever, I was getting flashbacks from the war/staminarose.

No. 257

You can now spoiler text as follows:

##spoilered text here## => spoilered text here

No. 258

File: 1415335690477.png (Spoiler Image,414.85 KB, 800x510, there will be ham.png)

>>230
Mind if I use this one on /cow/? It's pretty great.

No. 259

>>258
I don't get the joke, ham?

No. 260

>>258
>>259
I dont get it either. Is this a kosher joke?

No. 261

Is anyone else having trouble getting to the "HAES" thread? >>6396
Nothing loads for me and the post count doesn't seem to have gone up so I am assuming it isn't just me.

No. 262

>>261
I can't read the thread either, and it's my favourite thread too. It was getting kinda bloated already (pun intended) so maybe we should just make a new one?

No. 263

>>262
It's my fave too, I really miss it. It's inspired me to start toning myself up more. It terrifies me to be one of those people.

There's 1.5k posts, I guess we could make a new one to lay off the tldr of the whole thing.

No. 264

>>261
>>262
>>263
Fixed, sorry about that. >>6396 should work now.

Also, some time soon the problem of extremely long threads should be resolved to some degree.

No. 265

File: 1415825832881.jpg (49.39 KB, 400x400, 1363343983812.jpg)

Admin-san
Please be a saint and set a cap to threads, requiring people to make a new one at around 800-1000
It'll be great, but it's fine if you cannot.
Also, is there a such thing as a archive on this website?

No. 266

>>265

Honestly, I think this is something we can do ourselves. It doesn't have to be a rule because people aren't against making new threads when the current one is too long.
How about we all just make a new thread when it reaches 1000 posts. We can start on the Dakota/Weirdo-sister-I-forget-her-name one.

I'd do it, but I don't follow her and I like it when the first original post has a funny picture/screenshot, some info to enlighten the new, and continue the conversation where it last left off. (something about her eating "vegan" Japanese treats or something).

Of course these aren't guidelines, be creative! Be funny!

No. 267

>>265
For the time being, I've disabled bumping for all threads that have more than 1200 posts. This means you can still post in them, but new posts will no longer bump the thread. This should encourage people to make new ones when they want to continue active discussions.

This may be subject to change.

As for an archive, I'm not sure there's a point? I have disabled thread pruning, so all threads will last forever and will effectively be archived by default.

No. 268

File: 1415845879836.png (136.31 KB, 634x354, thumbs-up.png)

>>266
I felt like it was getting TOO long, and I think it goes for all threads, but like Admin said, it'll encourage to start a new thread.
T-Thank you for suggestion, anon.
>>267
Thanks.
I didn't know there was an archive, thank you admin, pls let me chu chu ya.

No. 269

Is the Doe Deere thread gone? I wanted to post something hilarious, but I can't find it!

No. 270

>>269
Here you go.

>>15719


Also did you try and use the catalog?

No. 271

>>270

Thanks anon, and no, I didn't even know we had a catalog!

I'll check it :)

No. 272

File: 1416309661404.png (232.64 KB, 1440x900, wat.png)

anyone have any idea what this is? i didn't fill it out - i just went to straight lolcow.farm and clicked on /pt/, which apparently bypasses it.

No. 273

>>272
This just means it thought you might have been a bot instead of a human. If it comes up, you only have to enter the captcha once (ever).

The fact that it let you through after leaving the page just means its initial guess about you being a bot was wrong, and the second time it properly verified you.

No. 274

Sorry about the outage today. The site was inaccessible for an hour or two.

Some people may still be unable access the site for 24 hours due to domain changes that can be slow to propagate. Other than that, everything should be okay now.

We're now using Cloudflare, so please report any issues you see regarding performance or consistency. If you post in a thread and don't see the post appear when you refresh or change pages, please report that too.

No. 275

File: 1416448604692.jpg (35.67 KB, 514x720, 10736160_734340919980989_14449…)

Admin, you really are the best

No. 276

File: 1416522574974.jpg (235.57 KB, 1280x960, 1406254792446.jpg)

>>274
thank you for the heads up admin

I love how you're involved in this site, you care about its upkeep, you gave us cool banners and did all that coding stuff

you're the best admin we've ever had. our previous admins gave me PTSD that's how bad they were as leaders

No. 277

>>275
>>276
Thanks!

No. 278

The site will now be moving to full HTTPS.

If you're getting errors or are unable to see the banner, you probably need to flush your DNS cache. Instructions for doing so across all operating systems can be found here: How to clear the DNS cache

For Windows, it is ipconfig /flushdns from the command line. If you're still encountering problems after doing so, please describe your issue in this thread.

No. 279

File: 1416528890989.jpg (26.81 KB, 600x375, 600492_652053978155670_2830047…)

You earned this admin ♥

No. 280

Hey, I keep getting an error that I can't post : <

No. 281

>>280
oh wait nvm, it's fine now

No. 282

There are going to be a few hiccups, sorry.

For now I've disabled forced HTTPS. Everyone please see if you can visit https://lolcow.farm directly. If you get an error, please post it in this thread. If you have any issues you should still be able to use http://lolcow.farm without any errors.

No. 283

hello admin-chan overlord we love you

No. 284

>>282
Admin-senpai, will i be able to access this board from school with the https?

also, will you also add a back to top button? it's hell scrolling back through threads to post on mobile
:'<

No. 285

>>284
If you have an iPhone (might work on Android too) you can tap the clock on your status bar, to take the page all the way to the top

No. 286

Hey admin I was wondering if you could make the reply window movable?

No. 287

>>284
>will i be able to access this board from school with the https?
Yes, it should work fine. Unless your school is blocking all HTTPS everywhere, which is very unlikely.

>also, will you also add a back to top button? it's hell scrolling back through threads to post on mobile

If you just want to reply to a post on your phone, you should be able to click on any post number and then see a Quick Reply box appear (it will also automatically quote the post). Also, you should have a hovering Quick Reply link that follows as you scroll. If either of those things don't appear, then please tell me what generation of phone you have, because that would suggest your phone does not properly support Javascript.

However, I have also added an up arrow just now.

>>286
Done.

Note: You may need to clear your browser cache to see these new changes appear. You can either wait a day, or manually clear the cache.

No. 288

File: 1416789650534.jpg (32.35 KB, 500x334, 1416318898062.jpg)

>>287
Aw yisss thank you.

No. 289

>>285
the clock thing didn't work :'(
>>287
idk my school is pretty strict. they blocked google translate lol.
hmm. it's Android 4.1.2 if that's what you mean by generation?

No. 290

i forgot to say thank you.

thank you!!

No. 291

omg I had a moment, forgive me

I have fourth generation ugh

No. 292

>>289
>idk my school is pretty strict. they blocked google translate lol.
The site is only accessible over HTTPS now, so try accessing it from school. If you can't, then your only option is to try and find a proxy that isn't blocked, sorry.

>it's Android 4.1.2 if that's what you mean by generation?

That's a fairly recent phone. In that case, you should be seeing a Quick Reply box when you click on post numbers. You should also be seeing the Quick Reply floating link on the right.

No. 293

Long threads won't load at all for me. I use chrome on my chromebook. I just get the notification asking me if want to kill the page because it's unresponsive.

Is there something I can do on my end to remedy this?

It's saddening because I really like the the moo cow and Haes thread.

No. 294

>>293
Happens to me too on my galaxy note, I think it's to do with the tablet's processing capabilities.

Too much stuff to load.

No. 295

File: 1416861629672.jpg (46.41 KB, 301x450, admin.jpg)

Admin, how do you pay for this site? Maybe you should put up some ads, iono.

No. 296

>>295
I would rather they put up a donate button than adds.

No. 297

>>296

Yes yes yes, please no ads, I'd rather donate.



Love you senpai-sama desu

No. 298

File: 1416874032147.png (146.97 KB, 540x960, Screenshot_2014-11-24-19-02-23…)

>>292
Yeah my phone's just shit haha.
I forgot to teat lolcow at school. Will do on the morrow. And thank you again for the back to top button, genuinely.

No. 299

>>298
Test lmao

No. 300

>>26139
>>26166
I should have a slightly better solution for this soon (sorry, I've been kind of busy lately), but for now everyone can use https://lite.lolcow.farm to access a "lite" version of the site. Everything is the same, except there is almost no Javascript.

Note that without Javascript, a lot of features will be missing. But it should resolve some of the problems with slower/older devices having issues rendering pages. Please tell me if it doesn't.

For now, when you use lite.lolcow.farm every page and thread you visit will be in lite mode. If you want to switch back, you'll have to manually type "https://lolcow.farm" in the URL bar again, or you could use a bookmark.

There may be some bugs with this, so please report them if you see any.

>>26218
>>26222
>>26225
I would never consider putting up ads, don't worry.

>Admin, how do you pay for this site?

I'm paying for it myself. The site doesn't cost very much to run at the moment, so there is no need for donations either.

No. 301

File: 1416891304226.jpg (63.18 KB, 500x500, cute-Rilakkuma-3D-Stickers-hea…)

>>300
Admin, it has been said quite a bit in this thread, you're awesome. Be as busy as you want, you're doing your best to improve the site and providing it for free. Honestly, 10/10 Admin material, keep it up Sempai ~

No. 302

File: 1417005502117.jpg (206.28 KB, 500x497, admin sama hacking the mainfra…)

>>300
We are so lucky to finally have a computer savvy admin.

Also, no stress about being busy, you've already done so much for the site you can safely retire.

No. 303

File: 1417811617989.gif (1 MB, 1018x424, 1417808105208.gif)

New blood for the blood gods.

No. 304

>>303
This world needs more OC banners.

No. 305

>>303
has to be 300x100 anon

No. 306

>>305


So fucking resize it then my goodness.

No. 307

>>306
i would but i don't even know how to use ms paint unfortunately :c

No. 308

File: 1417839319813.gif (128.37 KB, 300x100, oc.gif)

uhh i tried

No. 309

>>308

my sides have reached terminal velocity

No. 310

>>308
This looks worse, you didn't blend of properly like the original.

No. 311

>>310
Instead of bitching about it, why don't you try to fix it.

No. 312

>>311

It doesn't need to be redone it only needs to be cropped which Admin-san can do when they get online retard.

No. 313

>>308

Ew no don't wreck my creation kthnx

No. 314

>>312
Nigger I never said redo I said fix it.

No. 315

>>313
i didn't remake it though all i did was rescale it for admin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ im just tryna be helpful calm down

No. 316

>>303
>>306
>>312
>>313

Is this all the same poster or do a lot of anons just happen to have a stick up their arse today?

No. 317

>>316
Lots of tism in this thread.

No. 318

I've added a [ Lite ] link in the top left to switch to Lite mode from any page. I also added the up and down arrows to Lite mode. You can exit Lite mode by tapping the bar at the top and bottom of each page.

If you use a phone, I'd recommend using Lite mode to read most threads.

>>28423
Added this. If someone plans to scale or resize it differently I can replace it at any time.

No. 319

File: 1417983911218.gif (1.5 MB, 250x475, workingout.gif)

>>318

Thank you admin-sama. I wish you'd tell us what your gender is so I can spam you with the correct gifs. I'm going to assume you're a guy so have this mesmerizing gif.

Thank you sososooso much

No. 320

File: 1417984600443.gif (992.56 KB, 500x375, best of all time.gif)

>>319

M-MAYBE SHE'S A GAY WOMAN

EVER CONSIDERED THAT

STOP MARGINALISING MY PEOPLE YOU FASCIST PIG

Anyway Admin-san just in case you're a dyke have this too :>

No. 321

File: 1417984685744.jpeg (14.21 KB, 236x354, 448c818df0686ef268132720332bda…)

>>319
Maybe admin chan is a chocolate pipeline surfer

No. 322

>>319
>>320
>>321
What if admin-sama only likes 2d?

No. 323

File: 1417984939966.jpg (764.29 KB, 1466x1100, 312228.jpg)

>>322

I got that department covered.

No. 324

>>323
not animu or moe enough anon, too close to realistic 3DPD

No. 325

>>323
This and the butts are pretty neat. Someone should make a smexy thread on /b/

No. 326

File: 1417985674745.png (241.46 KB, 660x505, bluesteel.png)

Maybe admin-sama is ~gender-fluid~.

Either way, we won't judge you admin-sama. You like men, I'll find you some fine ass bubble butt man ass.

You like girls, I'll get you girls. Black, Hispanic, white Asian? Tentacles? You want eels coming out of a girls ass?

You like ass or titties moar? Curvy (CURVY, not a fucking curve admin-sama I don't want to even think of the very idea of you having a fatty fetish), stick thin, athletic?

You like feet admin-sama?

No. 327

>>321

Would let this dude bang me raw 1000/10.

No. 328

>>326
Gurl u creepi.

No. 329

File: 1417992276622.jpg (40.34 KB, 342x298, i dont really know what type o…)

>admin's face when their userbase's admiration takes a turn for some sort of sexual frenzy

No. 330

>>329

I just want to make senpai happy

No. 331

>>329
It's the lack of contact with our Queen, I'm sure. We need someone to creepily obsess over.

No. 332

>>331
Should I start making an admin-senpai altar?

No. 333

>>332

That would be nice, but first we need the admins fetishes. Doesn't even need to tell us gender, we will just spam admin with whatever they want as thanks ♥

I bet admin is a lesbian that likes big ol tittays.

No. 334

Even at lolcow a technically adept admin has to be a guy or a dyke.

Not saying I'm disagreeing.

>Internalised misogyny.

No. 335

>>334

I only suggested she might be a dyke because I am one too.

Pretty sure Admin is a she though.

No. 336

>>334
>implying lesbians aren't women

No. 337

>>336
Do you even chrischan

No. 338

I'm a *-gender semi-demi-romantic bovinekin. Please respect my preferences.

No. 339

>>338
…ilu more than words can say, admin. I needed this laugh so bad! XD <3

No. 340

>>338
What are your pronouns?

No. 341

File: 1418152123816.jpg (239.72 KB, 1590x800, diamonddogs.jpg)

I only know of one star gendered person.

No. 342

>>341
>tfw david bowie is admin of lolcow.farm

No. 343

Sorry admin-sama, that's me. I don't have a password to delete and I hit reply too quickly. I just wanted to say thank you again for being a great admin and doing your best. Have a good holiday season, whatever holiday you celebrate.

No. 344

>>340
Mū/mūr/myr. My triggers include curdling and prods.

>>343
Thank you anon!

No. 345

That cute cow on the bottom of the page is adorbs

No. 346

>>345
I never noticed the cow before…

Are you a fan of Harvest Moon, admin-senpai?

No. 347

File: 1418514022599.jpg (1.21 MB, 2329x1456, GoT beer labels.jpg)

>>338

Soo uhhh… tits or dicks?

Would you rather be spammed with cute animals?
Cats or dogs? (bunnies?)


Y u so complicated admin?

No. 348

File: 1418515852669.jpg (41.39 KB, 474x410, k5uo1jQjO1qd7ovlo1_500.jpg)

>>338
>>347

How about being spammed with cows?

No. 349

>>347
How about we don't spam poor admin

No. 350

So are we actually called "Farmers?" I'm not sure what to think of that.

It's half way funny, half way lame.

No. 351

File: 1418624648193.jpeg (32.33 KB, 225x298, F1_Farm_2111.jpeg)

>>350
How is it lame? Farming is one of the most hardcore jobs ever

No. 352

>>350

Not really.
Some fucking tardo from PULL (see, all of them) started calling us that a while back as some sort of insult and it was so funny we started using ironically.

I think it was Moemo, or Lovely-Stars.

No. 353

>>352

Possibly http://bouncymousy.tumblr.com/, the source for that lovely banner? Could've been Lovely_Stars instead.

I guess we're just "farmers" because "unmoderated scumbags" is too long.

No. 354

>>352
No, the name was decided on in one of the earliest threads here but I don't know which one anymore

No. 355

>>354
Oops, it actually was this one, it started with >>49

No. 356

What does the "Lite" option at the top of the page actually do?

No. 357

Top kek at the new banner, it's my new fav banner

No. 358

>>356
Removes script from lolcow, so you can't reply etc. only view it

It makes it super fast though, so if you're on a slow tablet or phone it's really useful

No. 359

>>358
You can reply, just there's no quick reply so you have to go to the top. Some useful features are missing but it's basically just like browsing old school 4chan.

No. 360

hiya admin-sama, are you still looking for moderators/farmhands?

No. 361

>>360
Not at the moment, but I might in the future. Please report any post in this thread and include your email address. Thanks.

No. 362

File: 1419888626689.jpg (28 KB, 300x100, quirckplanet.jpg)

Dear admin-sama,
I have an offering to the Lolcow deities.

No. 363

>>362
it's the healthiest option.

No. 364

Lolcow, have it your way.

No. 365

>>362
Holy fuck I love you

No. 366

Hey, admin? I'm having a problem and my posts keep getting eaten. I posted a lengthy reply in the lime crime thread and it got cut off before my link got inserted. What's going on?

No. 367

>>366
nice quads

did you try waiting 30 seconds or so and then refreshing the page? Your post should be fine

happened to me too, then it posted correctly anyway once i did that

No. 368

kek I love the CWC banner

No. 369

>>366
>>367
Sorry about that. I found the problem. It shouldn't happen again, please tell me if it does.

No. 370

File: 1420427123188.png (31.18 KB, 444x183, Screen Shot 2015-01-05 at 12.0…)

I got this error while trying to post?

No. 371

>>370
I'm getting this every time, but it does post.

No. 372


No. 373

Brought this up in another thread but maybe we should have a youtube personality board for lulzworthy beauty gurus, etc.? They don't quite fit the bill for lolcow, but are still amusing and shitty. We could call it /yt/ or something.

No. 374

>>373
Unless a large portion of users desire this, I'd prefer to avoid splintering boards unless there's a very good reason. I think having a small board count lends a lot of advantages.

Also, who exactly gets to make the determination of which category an individual falls in? One "beauty guru" may be considered a lolcow (/pt/-worthy) by some people while not one (/yt/-worthy) by others.

No. 375

>>373
>>374
I don't think a whole new board is needed for youtube personalities, I think a thread should suffice. Perhaps one for beauty gurus and another for other youtubers if necessary? I know I personally like coming to /pt/ and having all the threads I'm interested in reading in once place.

No. 376


No. 377

>>375
I agree. No need to make it more complicated than it has to be.

No. 378

Admin, the missing thread bug still exists and seems to be cache related.

I.e. a thread will be pushed off page 1 but not appear on page 2. If you look in the catalog you can see that the missing thread is between the last thread on page 1 and the first thread on page 2.

>There are only two hard things in Computer Science: cache invalidation and naming things.

No. 379

>>378
I did a few basic tests and I could not reproduce. I'm going to assume it only happens rarely. That would explain the intermittent reports of missing threads though.

I'll keep looking into it. It's possible that overly aggressive caching on the browser side may be to blame. It may also be Cloudflare. If you see it happen again, please try to refresh a few times and also clear your browser cache to check if the page changes.

No. 380

>>379

There were a couple of threads bumped today that then had the replies deleted. Maybe that's related?

No. 381

I was able to reproduce it. Still working on fixing it.

>>380
I didn't consider that so thanks, but turns out that's not the cause.

No. 382

Do we have tripcodes here? Will that be a thing in the future?
How big is our userbase? Has there been a lot of traffic from halfchan and 8chan?

And finally.. can we have a "catalog" button at the top of the page as well?
thank you admin sama <3

No. 383

>>382
>tripcodes

don't you dare

No. 384

>>383
Not saying I advocate their use, I'm just curious.

No. 385

>>384
I've seen few people using tripcodes (like Lain) so I am pretty sure they exist already.

No. 386

linkonym.com doesn't redirect to linked sites anymore. i think the new url is linkonym.appspot.com.

No. 387

>>386
Thanks, fixed.

No. 388

>>387
Thank you, Admin-sama.

No. 389

Can we get the option to add more than one file when posting? puritti purizu~♥

No. 390

>>389
I plan to add this, but it probably won't be in for a while, sorry.

No. 391

Hey admin, I was wondering if you could give us the option to make the reply window wider [it only gets longer]? It'd be of great help while proof-reading replies before sending them.

No. 392

>>391
Done.

>>382
>And finally.. can we have a "catalog" button at the top of the page as well?
Also added this.

No. 393

>>392
Thank you! Another question, do you have any plans of making a /cgl/ board?

No. 394

>>393
Please and no fucking Tumblrfags and 14 year olds who think they know shit XDing all over the place..

No. 395

>>393
>>394
I have no plans to at this time, though I'd consider it if there was a lot of demand. >>>/b/ can be used for /cgl/ discussion, and is already being used in that way. Otherwise, 8chan boards are probably a good alternative.

No. 396

>>395
Thank you for acknowledging us, Admin-sama!

No. 397

I don't know if its just because I have a shoddy internet connection ATM or what, but sometimes when I make a post, I'll get 'error: flood detected, post discarded', but my post will be posted multiple (two or three) times. Its only really started happening in the past few days

No. 398

I don't know if its just because I have a shoddy internet connection ATM or what, but sometimes when I make a post, I'll get 'error: flood detected, post discarded', but my post will be posted multiple (two or three) times. Its only really started happening in the past few days. It doesn't always post my post though, just sometimes it'll post it more than once

No. 399


No. 400

>>398
This is due to a combination of using a phone and having a spotty connection.

I'm going to adjust some settings so the duplicate posts are less likely to be submitted. You may still see the error message though. If you do, you should copy your post, close the tab, wait a minute or 2, check the thread again to see if your post went through, and if not try resubmitting again.

No. 401

>>400
Thanks for your help. I should have a decent connection in a week, so I'll try to refrain from posting too much, and sorry for the inconvenience

No. 402

So, I've noticed on some threads on mobile, that there is no arrow pointing down (unless you're at the complete bottom of the page) same thing for up.
I don't really mind it, but when you have to scroll down a long 1k thread, it's annoying.

No. 403

>>402
Does this happen for all threads? The likely cause is that the entire thread is taking a while to load. The arrows won't appear until all content is 100% loaded by your phone. The majority of this loading time is consumed by all the Javascript that runs. If you use lite mode, nearly all Javascript is gone except for the arrows, so I'd recommend trying that.

It seems odd that the arrows would only appear once you reach the bottom of the thread though. Can you try visiting multiple threads, large and small, and see if it's just a delay in the arrows appearing, or if they really only appear when you're at the bottom? Also check to see if the same thing happens in lite mode.

No. 404

Anon who uses mobile practically exclusively here, I have not run into that problem as of yet.

No. 405

>>403
I encounter this problem quite a bit on my phone. One thread will have arrows, the next won't.

No. 406

>>402
>>403
>>404
>>405

Hey guys, I don't think this is an actual problem.

I thought I was encountering this myself until I realised that the pages are loading zoomed in on my phone so that the arrows are just ever so slightly eclipsed out of few.

Next time you down see it, try pinching the screen and zooming out a tad.

No. 407

>>406

eclipsed out of view*

No. 408

>>406
>>403
>>404
>>405
First anon with the problem.
Replying to admin first, I don't get this with all threads. I got it with the Micky thread and the Kiki threads. Shorter threads don't get that problem. And I don't get this problem here either. I also tried making the page load longer, but the problem still remains.

As for the "solution", sadly that isn't the case. I just see ONE arrow at a time. At it would be top if I were top of the page, and bottom if I were at the bottom at the page.

No. 409

The problem is due to certain threads stretching the page width.

It may take some time to properly fix that across all devices. In the meantime, I was able to see both arrows again in those threads first by zooming out horizontally, then vertically. Try zooming out in all directions and see if that fixes the issue.

No. 410

Does the zoom out solution work for everyone at the moment?

I also fixed an old unrelated bug where clicking a post mention link (links such as >>2 >>3 >>4 quoting your post and appearing to the right of your post number) sometimes did not scroll all the way down to the actual post.

No. 411

test

No. 412

File: 1424006815411.jpg (52.35 KB, 397x187, error.jpg)

Getting this error when I try to post a reply on any thread. It seems to still post my reply, just wondering what it means?

No. 413

>>412
Same here! It posts anyway, so that's good

No. 414

>>412
I think it has something to do with the new posts feed because since that error started, new posts don't show there anymore.

No. 415

>>412
Same couldn't post at all last night.

Doing it now aswell.

No. 416

Sorry about that. I believe I've resolved the problem. Please tell me if you see the error again.

No. 417

>>416
thank you admin!

No. 418

File: 1424336699469.jpg (40.57 KB, 300x101, Kakakoti.jpg)


No. 419

>>418
brillant.

No. 420

>>418
Amazing.

No. 421

Admin-sama, Can you go to Dakota's sister's thread and help. Some anon is shitting up the place.

No. 422

>>421
Please see >>53935

I am looking to bring on 1-2 more janitors. If you are interested, please report any post in this thread and include your email address in the report message.

No. 423

We don't have a board/website-tan yet do we? Should we make one?

No. 424

>>423
I'm really liking the sound of this idea. It would be a fun little event at any rate.

No. 425

Admin-san I know this stuff isn't against the rules but do we have to entertain paedos?

>>2650

No. 426

>>425

it's not linking for some reason but somebody started a "little girls" thread on /b/.

No. 427

>>425
Dealt with it. I'll also adjust the rules to make it clear "borderline" pedo stuff is not welcome.

No. 428

>>427

ty ty.

No. 429

Did somebody link lolcow to /pol/ or something?

What's the influx of misogynistic/pedo/jew threads all of a sudden?

No. 430

>>429
Seems more like some /cow/ members got butthurt because we post no "real" lolcows acording to them.

No. 431

>>430
Yeah, idk why they don't just stay on /cow/ if they're so very bothered by who/what gets posted here? This has always been more of a gossip/drama board.

No. 432

>>427
Can we just have a rule thats no shota/loli at all. I know our /b/ is slow but its seems that theres three threads of it.
The straight shota thread,the loli and the one thats butthurt that you won't allow real cp.

I dont care what people do on their own time, but this is a really nice board.(till lately)
And can you ban the people starting troll/shit threads that have nothing to do with pt.

No. 433

>>432
Ugh we have pedo shit now? Nothing worse than whiny pedos.

I'll respect whatever decision admin ultimately takes regarding this, but he should consider being harsh about it, because once you start allowing pedos they all come in droves.

No. 434

>>427
Thanks admin san

No. 435

>>54339
I'm getting real tired of your shit.

No. 436

>>54339
Please leave.
And stop posting your porn on /b/.

No. 437

>>432
>>433
All of the "3D" stuff is strictly banned. I have no intention of allowing pedos.

The 2D shota threads and posts have actually been made by long-time site users and contributors (except for the hilarious trollmaster who posted today and was banned), and chans do have a culture of that sort of stuff.

I personally don't care about it much one way or another. If anyone feels strongly about 2D stuff please share your opinion here, as I am open to banning it.

No. 438

>>437
As long as the Shota is not nudity idgaf. Thanks for cleaning this mess up btw x

No. 439

>>437
I'm the one for banning loli/shota.
I know its gonna be on most chans, but like theres already sites/chans for that shit.
Don't see much point of it being here.

No. 440

>>439
Seconded. Especially when there's people saying shit like this >>53909

get rid of the pedos

No. 441

>>439
Agreeing with this as well. Please don't allow it, admin-sama.

No. 442

>>441
But this would also mean we wouldn't be allowed to post wannabe lolis anymore.

No. 443

>>442
How do you figure?

No. 444

>>422
Is there anyway to apply to be a janitor? Just curious because I have a lot of time considering I'm a shut in NEET and wouldn't mind helping. Plus I spend a lot of time here.

No. 445

>>444

It says how to apply in the post you linked.

No. 446

Seconded, thirded, fouthededredded on banning shota and loli from the boards.

I know that expansion sounds like a good idea but really, lolcow was never created with that intent and I don't think we should degrade ourselves to that level just entertain a minority of posters.

It may not be necessarily illegal aside from in some countries, but it's gross and is based off an entirely illegal, vile and disgusting reality.

Saying this as a child abuse victim myself, please don't start pandering to these sickos.
Shota and loli only makes light of people like me and turns our suffering into a complete fucking joke.

No. 447

>>424
Should that have its own thread or could we keep the discussion here?

No. 448

>>443
Because lolicon itself is already banned and loli is just the term for young looking anime characters, a lot of wannabe idols include stuff featuring them or cosplaying them in photos, like half of the Yukapon posts wouldn't be allowed anymore.

No. 449

>>448
Uhh…obviously they meant actual CP should be banned, 3D or 2D. Currently 2D is not banned.

No. 450

2D images such as shota and loli are now banned.

See https://lolcow.farm/rules.html

>3. Do not post sexually suggestive 2D or 3D images of minors, or any other image that could be construed as serving to appeal to pedophiles, even if the images are not technically illegal in the US. This obviously means no nude images of people under 18, and also includes clothed "child models", and nude or clothed "loli" and "shota".

No. 451

>>450
Thank you admin

No. 452

admin-sama bustin at em

No. 453

>>450
;__________________;

No. 454

File: 1425096592978.png (52.6 KB, 1080x1920, Screenshot_2015-02-27-23-06-45…)

Doesn't happen all the time, but only if I click a link on lolcow.

No. 455

>>454
Unfortunately, this is out of my control. linkonym.com is used to hide the referers of links (it's the only service I've found that properly blanks the referer rather than just rewriting it). They go over quota a lot.

Until I can find an equivalent alternative, you basically have to copy the link text itself and visit it directly, or backspace "www.linkonym.com/?" in the URL.

No. 456

>>453
Boo fuckin hoo. Go to 8chan for your kiddie porn.

No. 457

>>455
I've had this problem for a while but isn't inconvenient to just backspace the rest out.


Admin is there any chance of some form of recommended boad etiquette? I know it at least bothers a few others. There are so many shit posters who go on about themselves and spam caps lock posts.
I hate to be a shrew but there are just too many kids shitting up threads with their eyesore posts about their ~feels~.


Sorry if this not acceptable I just wanted to ask because the threads are deviating a lot more lately.

No. 458

>>457
Still this pissed about that Star Trek post ? Lmao grow up. The thread didn't even get derailed.

No. 459

>>458
I wasn't referring to that one being derailed. And that doesn't change the fact that it does happen with increasing frequency. There are just a lot of anons who post about themselves too much Or shitposting in general.

No. 460

>>459
rite.
you the same anon who got btfo for posting kiddie porn because you also shitted up kiki's thread.

>board etiquette


go back to halfchan

No. 461

>>460
>>458
You're doing exactly what this anon >>457 was talking about.


Also thanks admin san for banning all cp.

No. 462

>>55498
Will do thank you admin

No. 463

Can we please have some sort of filter or at least ban the influx of morons? I don't know what it is but for the past two months not only have people been shitting up the /b/ folder but we're getting teenybopper bitches from god knows where derailing threads with irrelevant comments about their lives. Can't it be a rule to post stupid shit like, "Amg wai u gaiz talkin bout dis doh?!?!" Its a website for gossiping. They stick around and just bitch and moan in the threads about the site's intended purpose. Did 4chan move over here or some shit?

No. 464

>>463
The poster you're referring to has actually been posting here for many months. To my knowledge there has been no recent influx or invasion from 4chan or Tumblr, with the exception of a few trolls. There are just various different kinds of people who use sites like these.

Also, some people intentionally post in that "tumblr tween" style yet are generally intelligent otherwise. I think it's a cultural thing.

As for enforcing post quality standards, at this time I have no plans to, but I do have a few possible distant-future ideas on implementing such a thing in a way that is not too authoritarian.

No. 465

I'm probabyly a million years late to notice this, but WE CAN CHANGE THE BOARD THEME NOW

The roach theme is my fav! Thank you admin!!!!

No. 466

>>465
All those themes have actually been there since day 1. :)

If anyone's interested in designing a custom theme, all you have to do is edit one of the stylesheets like https://lolcow.farm/stylesheets/wasabi.css. You can just change the colors, or make whatever changes you want. Email it to me and if it's any good, I'll add it as an option for everyone.

No. 467

Things that might need improvement:

>Firefox keeps asking to save a password when replying

>Can't close webms
>Link redirects are often broken
>Embedded Youtube width/height is wrong causing black bars

Remembering the scroll position in a thread so you can come back to it later would be a nice feature. 4chan his this already. A red line like in 4chanX mite b cool too.

No. 468

>>467
>Firefox keeps asking to save a password when replying
Chrome will often do this too. Usually it's based on the post password, which is set by default. I'd prefer to leave this on. Normally that field is autocompleted with a cookie, however if your lolcow.farm cookie is cleared for any reason, you won't be able to delete any posts you've made because the password would change. Browsers saving the password will ensure it remains the same even if the password cookie is gone. So, I expect some people might use that feature.

>Can't close webms

There should be a little minus sign at the top left of webms. That closes them.

>Link redirects are often broken

Still in the process of finding a proper alternative link anonymizer to use instead. I know this is a very annoying bug.

>Embedded Youtube width/height is wrong causing black bars

I don't really care enough to fix this, to be honest. The videos have the same dimensions as images, so that's how they appear. Making them larger would make them jut out in comparison to regular post images. I sort of assumed most people just played the videos in full screen anyway, and/or clicked on them to view it on Youtube directly.

>Remembering the scroll position in a thread so you can come back to it later would be a nice feature. 4chan his this already. A red line like in 4chanX mite b cool too.

I have plans to add both of these features.

No. 469

The site is currently experiencing some networking issues and potentially may not be accessible in the near future. I'll update once the problem is resolved.

No. 470

Problems are now resolved.

I also fixed the link anonymizer issue. Links should always work now.

No. 471

File: 1426154964503.png (23.09 KB, 246x396, 1414016421757.png)

>>470
Hideref is way better, it's never 'over capacity' so that's cool. Thanx admin

No. 472

Is there any reason why sometimes links aren't clickable?

At least on Skype when I want to share those webms of PT they aren't hyperlinked and my friend will have to copy+paste into a new tab.

No. 473

>>472
Yes, this is due to Skype not recognizing .farm as a valid top-level domain for websites.

You can replace the ".farm" with ".org" in any link and it'll redirect automatically. I actually bought the .org specifically for linking stuff (mostly due to Skype's annoyance).

No. 474

Can you purge non lolcows?
There seem to be a lot of them popping up within the last month.

No. 475

>>474
Aw, the whiny cunt is mad about their precious makeup guru. ^_^

How cute.

You a part of teh swamp familie XDDDDD

No. 476

>>474
The only thing that should be purged are anons like you who feel the need to go around dictating what people can and cannot post. Just because you happen to like someone doesn't mean that they're off limits. I think Felice Fawn is pretty, but I don't bitch and moan over posts about her. You sound new or like some stupid bitch from PULL who doesn't realize that this place isn't PULL.

No. 477

>>474
Are you posting on the EYK thread by any chance? hahaha

No. 478

>>474
This please. Only because I don't want to see lolcow turn into the next PULL where a bunch of folk from tumblr show up to self-promote.

No. 479

>>478
This had nothing to do with self promoting. Two new threads were created today and as soon as they were, the same one anon went around bitching and moaning about how EYK and gravewhore aren't lolcows because wehhhhhhh i liek themmmmm!1!1!1!! Those were the basis for each of those posts, in both threads, if anyone bothers to even look.

No. 480

>>478
This place WILL turn into PULL if retards don't stop acting as if their special criteria is what makes threads allowed here. They aren't the admin or the mods, they have no say in what gets posted. When people begin to try and act like there's some sort of etiquette and criteria for something like being a cunt and shittalking that's when the site will become minipull.

No. 481

>>480
hahaha they just went and bumped a bunch of threads as if we can't tell. the posts are close together with no effort whatsoever put into them.
how fucking desperate like really lol

No. 482

>>477
That's the problem. Anons like that can't even argue why someone isn't deserving of being here other than the fact that they like them and that should be reason enough. The EYK thread got so much hate despite people in the ahri thread asking for it all because one anon flipped their shit over their precious koreaboo bloggers being badmouthed.

It's happening again in the grav3yardgirl thread with the only reasoning being, "Wah wah d-don't talk bad bout what I like!"

These fucking autists.

No. 483

>>480
This. If they want coddling, they can go back to PULL or tumblr.

No. 484

>>481
I was the one asking for the purge or at last put them in /b/.

I dont care for EYK. Wasn't even in the thread.

No. 485

>>476
>>475
I never once said I liked anyone.
I'm here for "real" lolcows.
Not some pathetic flavour of the month attention whore.

>>477
Nope. Don't even know who they are.

No. 486

Hi, sorry if it's my mistake but
why I can't find Kirsten Amanda Brown's thread in lolcow.farm/pt/ ?
I can reach to it only directly through it's number
>>36355
but I can't see it in /pt/ even when it's updated

No. 487

>>486
Threads auto-sage once they reach 1200 posts. It's recommended to make a new thread when that happens.

I see the thread on page 5 at the moment.

No. 488

>>487
Thank you! New thread will be made.
Btw what is auto-sage? (Google translate doesn't recognize that…)

No. 489

>>488
Sage is a chan term (and a Japanese word). Auto-sage/bump-lock means the thread will no longer be bumped.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=sage

No. 490

>>489
>>53420
Aha, now I understand! From English it translates like "automatic wise".
Now it makes more sense, I should notice that :) Thank you

No. 491

>>489
Admin, is there any way we can have the function that filters trips and certain posts? I hate seeing all of the newfaggotry..

No. 492

>>491
This. Some samefag has been shitting up the joint in the last few hours.

No. 493

>>492
It's been happening over in /b/, too. Both here and in /b/, I'm seeing shit that no channers would have ever done.

>lolsorandum posts

>emotes
>not knowing what the fuck sage means
>bumping threads from months ago despite us having new ones for the cow
>trying to shit up every single thread by telling people what isn't and is a lolcow according to their standards and theirs alone

This fucker needs BTFO.

No. 494

>>493
The tripfagging is starting.

No. 495

>>492
They should be banned at this point, actually. They're purposefully shitting up and derailing threads and they're not going to stop. May as well throw down the hammer.

No. 496

>>487
>>489

Wait, sage is a Japanese term?
So it's not like the herb?
It's pronounced sah-gay?

No. 497

>>496

Just adding, I'm not a newfag, started on 4chan in 2006, I just had no idea sage was a Japanese word and Japanese is my major wtf.

No. 498

>>496
>>497
I think it comes from 下げる (sageru) which means to lower.

On Japanese imageboards,with sage, they also use "age". It basically means "bump".

OT aside, if that person gets tons of reports, will they get banned?

No. 499

>>497
>>498
I'm dying because I've been pronouncing it sage like the old wizard for years. Also 4channer since 2007. This feels so odd now.

No. 500

>>491
>>492
>>494
>>495
Please report specific posts. I've yet to receive a report about this.

No. 501

>>485
there are no criteria to be posted on lolcow other than if youre a retard online and people laugh at you, then you're an lolcow. if you don't approve of what someone else considers amusing, then too fucking bad. the "boring" lolcows will soon drop to the wayside while the jucier ones will stay revelant. just fucking deal with it bro, you aren't obligated to read every thread, just fucking scroll

No. 502

>>495
>>494
what where?

No. 503

This place has become a real cunt fest. In no way am I saying it should become a tumblr/PULL huge box with trigger warnings, but jesus, there's a huge amount of bitching back and forth. Maybe we should all dance naked in front of a fire pit and sync up our cycles with the moon in celebration of Our Goddess, Pixyteri.

Anyways, thanks for handling things as diplomatically as you can, Admin-sama. I'll stick to posting to my Queen's thread. Hail Pixyteri. Desu.

No. 504

>>503
I get what you're saying, but it's part of 'chan culture' (lol that sounds stupid) to be a dick to one another, call one another names etc.

Nobody really means it most of the time, and when they do they look retarded and sound like the marine copypasta anyway.

No. 505

>>503
There wouldn't be bitching if people knew to just fucking hide threads and shut the fuck up. It's been the same person over and over whining over what's posted then shitting up threads they're bumping for no real reason. /b/ was always slow and suddenly its picked up to the one samefag running around trying to be everywhere. It's probably some kid thinking that they're conducting a raid.

No. 506

File: 1426612880428.gif (3.77 MB, 350x195, Becool.gif)

>>505
I can understand your annoyance anon, but you come off super aggressive.

Be cool, brah.

No. 507

>>506
>too aggressive

Where exactly do you think you are, anon? Where do any of you who just rolled in within the last few days think you are? This is a place for being a cunt and gossiping. Yes, people are going to get aggravated when you shit up threads and whine about muh rules when its bitches who clearly never been here before because there's no lolcow criteria.

No. 508

>>507
sigh I've been following PT since the /cgl/ days. I was around during the Exodus of Maxfaggotry, found refuge in /cow/ and finally arrived here, at the promised land.

^In all my time across these chans, reactions toward newfags/pull/and tumblr were "must be summer" or "sounds like tumblr in here." So yeah, you sound too aggressive.

No. 509

>>508
I'm cool with new people, the tumblerinas and easily offended usually filter themselves out soon enough anyway.

Remember anons, we were all newfags once

No. 510

>>508
I also saw out tower of babel (StaminaRose) fall by the hands of two autistics and a shitty admin. It's been a long line of board drama and it's overreactions that really kill a place, not newfags or retarded posts. Newfags eventually figure shit out, especially when you ignore them. If you bitch them out, they'll land up spazzing a board for days.

No. 511

>>510
Let them spam and get banned.

No. 512

>>511
But didn't Admin-sempai say samefagging was fine? To avoid the dictators of Maxfag and Rose, we sorta have lax rules on shitposting.

Dunno, Admin-sempai - what's your take on the current shitposting rules?

No. 513

>>512
https://lolcow.farm/rules.html

As the rules say, samefagging and shitposting are allowed on both boards.

>Consistently off-topic or extremely irritating posts may result in a warning or short ban, and repeat offenders may receive a long or permanent ban from /pt/.

However, significant derailment of threads in /pt/ is not allowed, and I also have a special case for "extremely irritating posts". The criteria for "extremely irritating" is just an arbitrary decision on my part and nothing more.

I prefer to moderate as little as possible. I've spent a fair bit of time on forums and imageboards, and I've found (depending on the site's purpose) it's better to have too little moderation than too much, even if that occasionally results in a heightened amount of lower quality posts.

But if someone is a significant annoyance to the majority of the community, with no supporters, usually a warning and short ban are called for.

No. 514

>>513
As a frequent shitposter, I'm glad.

No. 515

>>514
Yeah, we wouldn't want Admin-sama gettin all Orange Citrus on us

No. 516

Can we please ban racist chan and esl chan? I completely understand not wanting to over moderate, but I feel like the shitposting is getting to a ridiculous level.

No. 517

>>516
People shouldn't be banned just because they don't agree with your political views.

No. 518

>>517
And obviously I completely agree with that.

It only becomes a problem when racial (or sexual or religious) discussion completely derails and dominates a thread originally about a totally different topic. Please feel free to discuss whatever you like in /b/, and please feel free to share your views and opinions in /pt/, even extreme views. But when posting in /pt/, try to keep things on topic and don't go out of your way to start fights over those views. If you'd really like to discuss a certain topic in depth, I'd recommend starting a thread in /b/ and taking the conversation there.

No. 519

>>516
Is esl chan someone who speaks shitty english or someone who points out other people's shitty english.

No. 520

>>519
they don't just have shitty english, they also type the same way Asha does, so it's a matter of questioning whether they function under the same logic or whether esl chans strange phrasing is due to not knowing english well

No. 521

File: 1427285851657.jpg (143.03 KB, 693x958, 136637918917.jpg)

>>520
Not to be picky, but ESL is technically 'english as a second language' which doesn't necessarily mean someone's english is horrible.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_as_a_second_or_foreign_language

I'm ESL and I don't type like a blithering retard. Nor do a lot of the other ESL posters on this board (there's a tonne of us).

ESL chan's english not being perfect is NOT a reason to ban them. It might be annoying to you, to see mistakes etc. but that's not an opinion everyone shares, and like admin said, unless they're shitposting like a champ or breaking the rules, there's no reason to ban them.

No. 522

>>521
I honestly don't care if people come on here and don't have the most perfect grasp of the English language. It really doesn't matter to me. They were just shitposting constantly and that's what's annoying.

But admin has said he won't ban anyone for anything so it really doesn't matter.

No. 523

>>522
I don't care about esl chan, tbh. It's freaking racist-chan who shifts up and derails every single thread. They even admitted to being the one who ruined the lolikillian(or whatever her name is) thread and they never face any sort of ban because "they contribute." I'm not trying to shit on you admin, I know it's tough to keep up with everyone, but come on. Racist chan is breaking the rules and they should face repercussions too.

No. 524

First off, please always report posts you think are derailing threads. It seems like most of the reports we get are complete bullshit ones ("this post is mean"), while the actual posts most people have issues with often aren't reported by anyone. I can't check up on all threads at all times.

>>523
>It's freaking racist-chan who shifts up and derails every single thread. They even admitted to being the one who ruined the lolikillian(or whatever her name is) thread and they never face any sort of ban because "they contribute."
Racist-chan has been (temporarily) banned several times, and is nearing her last strike. I will permaban someone if I have to, I'd just like to avoid it when I can.

She's not the only "racist" poster though (there are about 3 total), she's just the one who likes to interject into threads the most. As for the Lokillian thread, IMO she wasn't shitting it up at all and was on-topic. She only identified herself because she was accused of being the person she was defending.

No. 525

I'm not sure if it's just me, but spoiler images are just just blank square til I click them, and when I do click them the image is very transparent and I can't see the picture.

I'm on mobile if that helps.

No. 526

>>525
I'm unable to reproduce this.

Are you using the default board theme? Also, has anyone else encountered similar problems?

No. 527

>>525
Actually I'm having this problem too. Desktop on Chrome. Using default board theme.

No. 528

>>527
Could you take some screenshots, both before and after clicking the image? I'm having trouble reproducing this in any browser.

No. 529

File: 1427514136410.jpg (143.39 KB, 1360x585, before.jpg)

>>528
This wasn't with a spoiler image, but here's before.

No. 530

File: 1427514177799.jpg (114.65 KB, 1341x633, after.jpg)

>>529
After.

No. 531

>>70177
>>70178
Looks like you accidentally pressed (hide) above the image, unless this is happening with all images?

No. 532

>>531
I don't think so. It appeared a lot in Dakooter threads, Venus Threads, and that Lady At Deviantart

No. 533

>>532
>>531
So, it seems like it can be fixed when I press "show" but the thing is, I never hid the images, you know?
Not a big problem really, just don't get how it does it.

No. 534

>>533
That's quite weird. While using Chrome, can you open the developer console by pressing F12 on Windows or Cmd + Alt + i on OS X, click the Console tab, and type the following into the console:

localStorage.hiddenimages

Then press enter and post the output of that here.

No. 535

File: 1427581088560.png (5.81 KB, 617x382, foru.png)

>>534
While I can't confirm if it does the same on my computer like the other anon, but here's the output of the directions ya told me

My problem only happened when I was on mobile.

No. 536

>>535
Thanks. That means you should have no images hidden at this time.

Unfortunately you would have to run the same command on your phone to effectively troubleshoot, and there's no easy way to do so with Mobile Chrome.

What percentage of overall images are doing that? Is it possible you're accidentally pressing (hide) when you click to expand an image on your phone?

No. 537

File: 1427585366452.jpg (69.67 KB, 725x466, sadasdasd.jpg)

Admin-chan I'm not happy about a ban one of your farmhands issued to me in a thread.

Some shitposter was derailing the thread Haku thread talking about how basically everybody in the world inhabits aspects of Shinji from Evangelion (I don't even fucking know) and how we're all insecure and I told them to shut the fuck up and received a ban for it.

Normally I wouldn't bitch about something like thus, but I'm concerned because it's haphazard moderation like this and tossing out bans for no real discernible reason that is the reason I left 4chan.

If trying to get shitposters/derailers out of a thread is against the rules can we get some clearer guidelines on this?

No. 538

>>70549
That is a valid ban. Thread derailment has become a major issue lately. You're paraphrasing the real situation: you both made more than 4 posts about the subject and were arguing, with no clear end in sight. Both of you appeared to be derailing the thread and perpetuating the off-topic discussion, which quickly devolved into bickering and namecalling, so you were both banned for the same length of time (5 hours). The ban also only applied to /pt/ and not /b/.

Bans are very rarely issued here and I really do try to employ the most relaxed moderation policy I can. But many users have reported a reduction in discussion quality due to thread derailments in /pt/.

The rules state in multiple places that excessive off-topic discussion does not belong in /pt/ threads, but I agree the rules are fairly vague regarding what degree of off-topic discussion is acceptable and when it crosses over into pure derailment.

https://lolcow.farm/rules.html

>Keep discussion to lolcows for the most part. Anything that's considerably off-topic may be moved to /b/.

>Consistently off-topic or extremely irritating posts may result in a warning or short ban.
>Off-topic threads or posts may be moved to /b/. Threads and posts will not be deleted simply for being off-topic.


I'd like feedback from the community regarding these 2 points:

1. Were these particular 5 hour bans justified for topic derailment?

Here are the off-topic posts (nearly all of which were made by the 2 banned posters), if anyone would like to take a look:

>>68963
>>69673
>>69798
>>70380
>>70381
>>70389
>>70395
>>70404
>>70408
>>70416
>>70420
>>70426

2. Should we establish a rigorously defined policy for thread derailing and the appropriate moderative action to take, and if so, what should that policy look like? Draft copies of example guidelines would be appreciated.

No. 539

>>536
I don't, I would just scroll down with my right hand, totally unzoomed and it'll appear like that, I'll get screenshots when my phone is charged. It's not a high amount of images, but a good percentage of them were on spoiler images (especially in Lady Alt and Fat fuck who's name I forgot thread)

No. 540

>>70569
>>538

Would it not make sense to ban the person that started it and perpetuated it as opposed to the person trying to prevent it though?

I am super salts >:l

No. 541

>>537
>>540
You were shitposting, too, honestly. The whole thing would have ended had you never perpetuated it, especially considering the Eva post was like a day old but you still felt the need to respond with b8.
I'm the second person who got banned btw. I don't really mind it because I was posting OT shit to begin with, it's fair.

No. 542

>>539
I'll keep looking into it. I'm not really sure what might be causing this.

>>540
You could've ignored them, or told them to stop posting and go elsewhere, but instead you were directly fueling the fire.

No. 543

>>538

I also want to query, if you did get another off topic poster who seemed intent on derailing a thread like the Shinji poster and multiple people began trying to get them to stop, say 5,6+ people, maybe even the entire thread, would you proceed to ban everybody that contributed to that or just the shitposter?

I'd also like to add in the posts you linked you said nearly all of which were made by the 2 banned posters but mine are actually just under half of them so there's obviously a 3rd/4th party in there.

>>541

Oh rite nvm.

No. 544

>>541

I did not respond to day old bait, my first post into the Eva "discussion" was >>70380, made one hour after the post before that. I'm not the person arguing prior to that so idk why I got banned.

No. 545

>>543
At that point everybody in the thread would be derailing shit just to tell one shitposter to fuck off, which would be pretty retarded and would warrant a short ban.

No. 546

>>545

>which would be pretty retarded and would warrant a short ban


That worries me actually because it was reasons like that, the janitors/mods on 4chan just banning out of the blue without warning, that caused me to leave in the first place.

Like something I've already treasured about this place, even though it's fairly young, is that the moderations has always been fairly lax and the community pretty much allowed to moderate and control itself which is what I was trying to do when that faggot wouldn't shut up about Eva.

I'm not happy about being chastised for something I didn't even start.

No. 547

>>546
You didn't start it, but you did continue it.

No. 548

>>547

I did continue it but then I'm curious why only I and Shinji fag were banned when there was a 3rd or 4th party involved.

No. 549

>>70596
>say 5,6+ people, maybe even the entire thread, would you proceed to ban everybody that contributed to that or just the shitposter?

It really depends on what they were saying. If it was "FUCK OFF STOP POSTING", and not repeats of the same post over and over, I wouldn't blame them and wouldn't care. If it's "NO YOU'RE COMPLETELY WRONG ABOUT SHINJI AND BLAH BLAH BLAH HERE'S WHY YOU MASSIVE FAGGOT", I probably would be inclined to ban all of them. Irrelevant but I am a little bit of a Shinji sympathizer myself.

>>70600
It was the arguing after that post which was really the issue. I know you didn't start it, but you went overboard when responding to them.

I was alerted to the posts by a report, and saw multiple posters in the thread didn't seem pleased with all the derailment, which is another reason why I thought it should stop.

But again, I'd like to see input from more posters regarding this issue. This site isn't exactly a democracy but I only want to do what the users want, so I am more than willing to change my policies and views. If some people think the 5 hour bans were excessive in this scenario then I am certainly willing to adjust moderation policy going forward.

>>70617
The third poster made only one post in that chain (one of the first few posts), and did not post anything further. One off-topic post is different from engaging in a long, drawn out off-topic argument.

No. 550

>>549

I think the ban was fine. Five hours is nothing and they were indeed shitposting. The second party is okay with it. There only seems to be one person who's whining about it and it's the other one who got put in time-out.

No. 551

>>549

I don't think they're excessive I just would have preferred a warning first.

At the end of the day I'm just super autistic about this kind of stuff and I'm worried about this place going the way of 4chan, Maxfag and Staminarose.

>>550

Hell yeah I'm salty, m-muh injustice.

No. 552

>>551
I understand. Historically we have almost always given a warning first with no ban for off-topic discussion, but I've noticed warnings by themselves not being very effective and have also seen an uptick in complaints about derailment recently.

In the future, I will probably go back to erring towards always giving a warning first if the poster mostly has a clean record.

No. 553

File: 1427589592455.jpg (55.16 KB, 500x397, tumblr_inline_nkuyrnBCe11rfngo…)

>>552

Th-thanks.

No. 554

Can we get a cgl section please?

No. 555

>>554
This would be nice.

Also how far are you on the remembering scroll position feature? This is still my biggest annoyance about lolcow because I have to re-read a lot of posts just to be sure I scrolled back to where I stopped reading or where the thread stopped the day before. Thanks for your awesome work so far though!!

No. 556

>>554
See >>395

/b/ has done a pretty good job of being a surrogate /cgl/, I think. I don't really like splitting boards up too much because the board population is not anywhere near the size of 8chan or 4chan, though it certainly is an active community.

8chan /cgl/ and related boards seem like decent alternatives to 4chan /cgl/ if you're looking for a /cgl/ with more relaxed rules.

I would only make a /cgl/ here if there was a lot of demand for it (25+ people requesting it). If anyone else thinks 8chan /cgl/ is somehow insufficient and if they really think we should open up a /cgl/, please post in this thread.

The 2 options for implementing it would be:

1. Rename to /b/ to /bgl/ or something, and make it /cgl/-focused. "Beagles" sounds nice I guess.

2. Open up a third board, /cgl/, and appoint mods to enforce rules specific to that board to ensure most content is on-topic. I would not want the role of deciding whether or not something is sufficiently "seagully".

>>555
I have a version of it ready, but it's a bit broken, makes threads load slower, and makes scrolling somewhat laggier. I'm not too happy with it at the moment.

I plan on doing a major code upgrade some time within the next 30 days, and around then a version of this feature should be implemented.

No. 557

>>556
pls do not make a third board
everything uncow related should just go to fucking /b/ thank u admin

No. 558

>>557
I agree. Just put it in /b/ .

No. 559

>>556
We're fine with two boards! B is a good board for OT stuff.

No. 560

>>556
hmmm than you for making it anon, but I don't think we have enough gulls to keep it going

No. 561

>>560
Admin not anon blaaah

No. 562

>>561
>blaaaaaaah
G-goatkin-chan?

No. 563

File: 1428144350444.png (329.3 KB, 500x333, original.png)


No. 564


No. 565

>>563
so cute

No. 566

Shiiiiit, that new Ashley banner scared the hell out of me.

No. 567

>>566
its perfect 11/10

No. 568

Sorry, posting issues have been resolved.

No. 569

>>76359
>Quick reply doesn't work on mobile.. I always get sent to the top when clicking posts.

Me too!

No. 570

So, have you considering trying out a /cgl/ board? One on 8chan is deeeeead.

No. 571

>>570
Use /b/

No. 572

>>570
So, have you considered reading through the thread? It was brought up five days ago, with reasons as to why there will probably not be a /cgl/.

No. 573

Some minor improvements have been made to Lite mode.

No. 574

Fuck. Admin-sempai…this Ashely banner made me pee my pants. Any anons willing to tuck me in tonight? Leave the fucking light on.

Jesus. Help me.

No. 575

I had a dream that I was banned for shitposting for 23hrs.

Now I'm scared. What if it was a prophecy?

No. 576

>>575
If it was a prophecy, I'm next.

No. 577

>>575
That dream is too real. I'd be afraid.

No. 578

Website kinda goes offline for a while. Not sure if it's me.

No. 579

>>578
Please tell me if it happens again.

No. 580

>>579
Just happened again. I didn't get a glimpse of it properly but it said I was online, and cloudfare was online. I did not get to read the last one, but maybe that's the cause of it.

No. 581

>>578
That happened to me earlier today too.

No. 582

>>579
Yeah, it's been off and on.

No. 583

I believe this may have been due to an issue with Cloudflare. Tell me if you see the same message any time today.

No. 584

>>583

I saw it just now for a good 10-15 minutes.

No. 585

File: 1429134955737.jpg (32.27 KB, 948x464, 01.JPG)

>>583
Have to keep refreshing because I'm getting this. It's been happening for a couple of hours.

No. 586

Looks like we've had an increase in visitors and bandwidth lately, and the server is having some trouble keeping up. I may have to upgrade the server soon.

No. 587

>>586

Out of curiosity what are the stats for this site, i.e. average pageloads, unique visitors per day, amount of data uploaded daily, total views etc.

No. 588

>>587
I also asked this before but never got an answer.

Admin, do you need help (like money) to upgrade the servers? I would be able to donate a bit if it helps out the board.

No. 589

File: 1429164530382.png (41.74 KB, 1345x633, borken.png)

it borked

No. 590

>>589
Yeah I got that message a bunch of times within the past few hours too

No. 591

Sorry about the issues. The site will likely be unstable over the next few days. If you receive a timeout error just press the Retry button.

>>588
Thanks for the support, but that won't be necessary.

No. 592

>>591
You could sell lolcow gear, like t-shirts with dakooter's or berry's face.

I would order 10

No. 593

>>592
No.
That's a fucking idiot idea.

No. 594

File: 1429205630658.jpg (158.38 KB, 500x615, 52842440.jpg)


No. 595

>>594
Using an outdated, unfunny meme. Lovely.

No. 596

No.

No. 597

>>592

I don't think merchandising falls within parody law.

No. 598

ADMIN-CHAN WHY WON'T YOU TELL US SITE STATS

No. 599

File: 1429230781435.png (103.87 KB, 945x634, stats.png)

Past 30 days. You can also see growth over the past year above the main graph.

No. 600

>>599

Holy fuck Admin-chan you should make some revenue off this baby.
I know I'm not the only one that'd be opposed to some small advertisements, and you deserve it.

No. 601

>>600
I hate ads and would never subject anyone else to them. The only revenue I would be comfortable with is donations for specific improvements, but even that I really don't need and probably never will unless traffic grows by more than 3x it is now. The server will be upgraded soon.

No. 602

>>599
holy fucking shit there are a ton of people on lolcow my god

No. 603

>>601
Small ads are no biggie. I leave the ads on when I use 4chan and they don't bother me since they're small banners at the top and bottom of the pages. Think about it. I don't think many lolcow users would honestly be opposed to the idea.

No. 604

The problem with ads is that I'm pretty sure this site will violate the ToS of any good network. So if for example Adense was added a cow could report lolcow.farm and have the account suspended in a day. Then we'd have to listen to them cheer about how they "hurt the trolls in their wallet" or some shit.

Any ad network that would allow this site would serve horrible ads and we'd all block them anyway.

No. 605

Dear Admin-sama,
I'm having some trouble with the site that might be cloudflare related but I wanted to report it just in case anyone else was having a similar issue. Sometimes, I will see a brief 'flash' of new posts, but when the page fully loads they all disappear. I feel like I'm at least an hour/half an hour behind all posts on the site.

also I'm using a laptop right now so it shouldn't be a mobile problem. thank you a lot. please let us know if you need any help with the server.

No. 606

>>602
ya I'm shocked. I thought it was like 10 people shitposting hard

No. 607

>>604

Not if you used ads from places that don't give a fuck about that kind of stuff, like J-list and porn sites, or those little desperate mobile game apps that advertise their trash like "FIRE OF WAR" and "GODDESS WINGS REALM".

That being said Admin-chan is very noble about this. If I were Admin you'd be damn sure I'd be slapping ads on this shit ASAP, but then again I'm poor.

No. 608

>>606
I wonder how many of those visitors actually post and how many lurk? But still, goddamn.

No. 609

>>608
I wonder what portion of those views are just lolcows themselves, furiously f5ing their own threads?

No. 610

>>599
Wow, around 80k unique visitors. Crazy. I always kinda thought there was maybe ~1000. Wonder how many are regulars and how many post.

No. 611

>>609
I tend to post a lot in multiple threads, so I'm sure I'm one of the users that refreshes a lot.

No. 612

>>611
I think we should have independent posting IDs.

Also, sorry to shit up the thread Admin, but I did have a question. What's going to happen when the catalogue reaches 100 pages? I feel they they will start overtaking the screen eventually.

No. 613

>>612
No independent posting IDs. If you want to identify yourself, use a tripcode.

No. 614

>>612
The page bar at the top already automatically disappears on smaller screens. However, it'll eventually get too big for everyone. I'll redesign it when that happens.

No. 615

I feel like there's one anon going around just saying edgy shit and provoking people and setting everything off topic. It's like living in a youtube comment section.

No. 616

>>615
point out the exact posts?

No. 617

File: 1429656677146.gif (81.69 KB, 300x100, corndog.gif)

I made a thing ( '__' )

No. 618

File: 1429657065370.gif (81.78 KB, 300x100, corndog-fixed.gif)

Silly me, I made a mistake, sorry. Now fixed.

No. 619

File: 1429657169613.jpg (34.37 KB, 640x480, glorious.jpg)


No. 620

>>618
It's perfect

No. 621

File: 1429657767874.gif (457.87 KB, 500x279, giphy (1).gif)


No. 622

>>615
It's Totemokawaii isn't it?

No. 623

Some changes have been made to the server to increase performance. Please report any issues, oddities, or slowness you notice, no matter how small.

>>618
Added.

No. 624

File: 1429659630662.gif (28.76 KB, 300x100, myqueen.gif)

Thanks everyone! And thanks, Admin-sama!

I made another one, no mistake this time! ^^

No. 625

File: 1429664209016.gif (569 KB, 316x150, h.gif)


No. 626

File: 1429664411557.gif (207.35 KB, 300x100, pt-dance.gif)

Hope Admin-sama won't get annoyed <3

No. 627

>>626
omg I love these new banners, can you do one of her making retard faces with the lemons.

No. 628

>>627
Thanks! I was just planning to made a lemon face banner ;P

No. 629

>>626

Your banners are fantastic, anon

>>627

Oh god please yes, seconded

No. 630

>>627
>>626
>>624
>>623
>>618

Fuck, let's make these PULL fuckers know who the real queen is and may they bow their heads in reverence.

No. 631

File: 1429667257211.gif (86.85 KB, 300x100, lemonface.gif)

Ta-daaa!

No. 632

>>631
Beautiful!

But

"When Life Gives you Lemons
Farm for Milk"

???

I tried being witty…:(

No. 633

>>631
Love it!!

No. 634

>>631
It's perfect!

No. 635

Thanks guys! Long live the Queen!~<3

>>632
By this line, I was trying to say "When life gives you lemons, go to lolcow.farm to cheer yourself up by having a good laugh". Advertising is my job, but I probably need to find another one, because I failed at it and had to explain the meaning of this line, lol.
On the other hand, English is not my native language, so maybe I failed just because of language barriers? I dunno

No. 636

>>635
Kek, it should have been "When rife gives you remons"

No. 637

>>635
nooo it's great.

No. 638

>>635
Don't worry, it's awesome, thank you for your work.

No. 639

>>635
Ha. We're just offering lame suggestions so we can play too. It's awesome as is!

No. 640

>>635
Your banners are amazing anon! We needed more PT banners <3

Putting up an idea if you're not tired by now, maybe the clip of her bouncing on the bed but overlay text that says "lolcow" so she's bouncing on it if that would work?

No. 641

>>607

>like "FIRE OF WAR" and "GODDESS WINGS REALM"


I know this is an old-ish post now but I lol'd hard

No. 642

>>636

I veto "when rife gives you remons".

No. 643

>>636

I just realised I don't know what veto means.

I mean I approve it.

No. 644

>>643
You somehow managed to know what the exact opposite of veto meant, at least. :)

No. 645

>>631
So happy it's a banner now.

No. 646

All the new banners have been added. Please keep the banner submissions coming.

No. 647

File: 1429769573340.gif (772.84 KB, 260x100, KAKApoopoopeepeeshire.gif)


No. 648

>>647
i love you anon

No. 649

>>647
It could say "Don't laugh, send help" instead" lol

No. 650

File: 1429779012999.gif (90.16 KB, 300x100, PTmon.gif)

Same banner fag here. Enjoy!

No. 651

>>650

Holy shit anon that's so cool

No. 652

>>650
You are amazing.

No. 653

File: 1429794244777.jpg (9.83 KB, 200x200, 774939.jpg)


No. 654

I'm in love with the new banners, well done everyone!

No. 655

>>654
Except 87308, they all were made by the same Anon.
Glad to support my favorite board!

No. 656

>>650
best thing i've seen all week

No. 657

File: 1429903479897.gif (625.65 KB, 300x100, kiki.gif)

new board rule: whenever you see this banner, harty pard for 30 seconds

No. 658

>>657
I accept that challenge.

No. 659

>>657
bless u anon

No. 660

>>658
me too

No. 661

Am I confused or has the latest Quirky thread been deleted? Anyone know?

No. 662

>>661
Nah?
>>74526

No. 663

>>662 thanks, I guess my phone was being weird

No. 664

Hey admin, can we please have a rule for not trashing children who are obviously in very sad/illegal situations? A child being mocked for distributing child pornography and being the victim of statutory rape is not lol worthy. It is sad and disgusting.
Seeing people on here stating that kids in these situations are "getting what they deserve" is down right disturbing.

No. 665

>>664
Agreed. I know some lolcows start early, but can we have a "no bashing children under 16" rule or something?

No. 666

>>664

Yes, I agree with this proposal.

No. 667

>>661
Were you searching page by page or did you use the catalog? I recommend using the catalog to find a specific thread. There's still an intermittent issue where a page may show you content that's slightly out of date. This can sometimes cause a thread to "disappear" if a thread is on the edge between 2 pages.

If you run into this issue and don't want to use the catalog for some reason, you can refresh once or twice (once should usually be good enough, but sometimes twice may be required) on each page to clear the cache.

>>664
>>665
Can you link or report some example posts? I plan on adding a rule like this, though I'm not completely sure how I should word it or how strict it should be. I agree that harassment and excessively personal attacks of minors isn't good.

No. 668

>>667

I think the first anon is referring to the erica camacho thread.

No. 669

>>668
I was also referring to that.

No. 670

>>667

I also think that that thread with the guy who raped his child sister poses some of the same problems as the erika camacho thread in terms of its treatment of minors and victims of abuse. New articles don't mention minors who've been sexually assaulted but her picture and name are mentioned in the thread, IIRC. I

No. 671

>>670
I think that one is a bit worse than the Erica thread, because that little girl hasn't even done anything. In 5-6 years she's going to be looking to get her first job, and someone will inevitably google her name.

No. 672

>>671

I agree. OP was touchy when someone said that the thread was messed up and. OP threw in that he/she was molested as a child, which has nothing to do with this little girl having her history publicized.

No. 673

>>671
>>672
Her name was not listed in the thread.
OP here again. I'm sorry, I didn't realize how butthurt everyone would be about the picture for the thread. It was just the one /cow/ used, so I didn't really think about it. Btw I am a victim of sexual abuse so I can sympathize with the girl, which is why I never said I wouldn't change the picture. But I just kind of think you guys are overreacting a bit. inb4 attacked

Admin, I said in the thread that the picture can be changed, I have no opposition to that. Sorry for offending everyone, sometimes my replies are unnecessarily cunty.

No. 674

>>673
>Her name was not listed in the thread.

Disregard this, I suck millions of cocks. I didn't realize someone else had mentions her first name.

Again, people are constantly attacking me for the picture, and I'm really sorry. Obviously I didn't think about it. Please understand I am not fighting to change the OP picture at all and I was busy moving all day so I didn't pay attention to the thread.

Sorry again, everyone.

No. 675

>>674
>>674

It's the way you come off dude take a chill pill or go back to 8ch. This is mostly populated by females this board, so we're not really going to be okay with Child rape. If you'd of just said oh sorry admin please change right away instead of getting in a tizzy mossy people wouldn't care. Your personality is very lolcowish. Also to have enough morals to realise that picture is really not okay in the first place would have been nice too bit w/e

No. 676

No more arguing or discussion about this please. No one here did anything wrong, and the situation is resolved.

No. 677

Can we get a search bar, please?

No. 678

>>677
do you not know how to ctrl+f

No. 679

>>92477
Cloudflare's default 404 search isn't too bad. Visit a non-existent page like https://lolcow.farm/search.

Alternatively, type "site:lolcow.farm" before any Google query.

No. 680

Hello Admin, I have an issue.
Every time I try to visit lolcow.farm from computer where ai have wi-fi, or from mobile while I'm on wi-fi (no matter if I'm using wi-fi from home or any other place), I see "403 forbidden" and I can't open the website. However, once I'm on 3G or E, I can normally browse the site.
Do you maybe know what might be the problem, how to solve it?

No. 681

>>680
I believe I've fixed it, can you check again and see if it's still happening?

No. 682

>>681
Yes, no problem now!! Thank you wow :)))

No. 683

That Ashley banner is genuinely terrifying, jesus.

No. 684

>>93370

Can we get a farmhand to clean this up?

No. 685

File: 1430792521360.gif (347.64 KB, 300x100, myqueen.gif)

I did something but I dunno if it's much good

No. 686

>>685
Hahaha, this portrays the way I feel about my Queen being discussed on here so accurately! Bravo! I love it!

No. 687

>>93766

LOVE

No. 688

>>685
It's awesome and startlingly accurate

No. 689

File: 1431148272671.gif (575.31 KB, 300x100, liftin kawaii.gif)

in light of recent events

No. 690

I am absolutely in love with these new banners.

No. 691

>>689
TOP KEK

No. 692

All links contained within new posts are now automatically submitted to https://archive.is, an independent web archival service. If you hover over a link, a new link should appear to the right which allows you to view the archived version.

I would recommend posting the direct versions of links from now on, and let the board handle the archiving. This saves you time, and also lets readers easily compare between the page as it looked at the time the post was submitted, and how the page looks now.

This only applies to links made as of a few hours ago, and all future links. Any links posted before then have not been archived and will not display anything when hovered.

No. 693

>>692
The lulz has intensified.

No. 694

>>692
anon-sama, i love you.

No. 695

>>692
This surely is a professional lolcow board

No. 696

File: 1431280852028.png (10.29 KB, 618x103, ptmotto.png)

Could some crafty anon make this tweet into a banner please? It could be our new motto!

No. 697

File: 1431302888391.jpg (49.74 KB, 570x260, PixyBanner.jpg)

>>696

I tried, but is it basic as fuck

No. 698

>>697

it is*

No. 699

>>697
>>698

Gimme an hour and I'll whip up something glorious.

I say an hour because I'm in FFXIV.

No. 700

File: 1431306597952.gif (2.88 MB, 300x100, dsfsf.gif)


No. 701

>>700
OH. MY. FUCKING.
SHIT
SHIT

No. 702

>>700
This reminds me of the Elisa Lam elevator tapes

No. 703

>>702
pls no anon, now i can't unsee

No. 704

>>700
Amazing. Added.

No. 705

>>704

Okay so I decided I wanted to spice it up by having her kicking away bottles of shampoo and deodorant.

If I post the updated version here later will you add that instead?

(also thnx Admin-chan, I'm a big fan)

No. 706

>>705
this is just one anon's opinion, but i think that would be too much. it's perfect the way it is. you should use that idea to make a different banner altogether.

No. 707

>>706
I agree completely with this. It would make for another great banner.

No. 708

>>700
PERFECTION!

No. 709

>>706
>>707
>>708

Ooooh okay I'll leave as is :>

No. 710

The page title will now use the OP's subject line if it's available. I would recommend setting the subject to something descriptive when you make a new thread.

I also fixed a few bugs which no one probably noticed were present.

No. 711

File: 1431567849751.gif (265.33 KB, 300x100, YAS ADMIN SAMA YASSS.gif)


No. 712

File: 1431576127535.png (788 B, 168x25, brackets.png)

>>101461
That's just the skin style. It links to the rules, /b/ and /pt/ in a really dark font that you can't see well due to the background.

No. 713

File: 1431593647157.gif (Spoiler Image,1022.85 KB, 285x200, yanasty.gif)

>>101630
You are retarded. Anon literally just answered your stupid question.

No. 714

>>101646
>I know there are a lot of girls on this board but seriously

Calm your sweaty moobs. Also it's funny how you think women are stupid but you're obviously an idiot.

No. 715

remembered scroll position when

No. 716

File: 1431610708708.png (52.63 KB, 300x100, tkbanner.png)

clearly needs to be a banner

No. 717

>>716

Eh, there's not enough referncing in this.
If you didn't know what Hey Arnold was you'd be really confused about why two heads were stuck on top of a cartoon. I was for like, 10 seconds.

No. 718

>>716
Yes, make this happen. Long live our cow princess!

No. 719

>>717
I think everyone who's read totemokawaii's thread knows what it's all about. I created it as an example, but if anyone wants to make an other one then go ahead.

Either way our cow princess deserves a banner<3

No. 720

File: 1431611854282.png (6.59 KB, 951x83, njklnvjfblr.png)

>>716
>>717
>>718
>>719
Totemo cow needs a banner

No. 721

>>720
TotemoCowaii

No. 722

>>717
eh I think a good number of us know about Hey Arnold. It's just confusing because it's shooped pretty badly and you can barely tell what's in the bg.

No. 723

>>718
>>719
>>720
>thinking TK is even remotely a cow princess
kek.

I agree with this anon >>722 in that it's just poorly executed.

No. 724

>>715
In the near future. Still working out performance issues.

No. 725

>>723
Shaddup Totemo.

No. 726

>Lies about being other people
>Grabbed a random guy shoving markers up his ass and claimed it was her friend to distract others from her lulz
>bragged about being the forum jerk
>tough guy attitude goes away once posted here
>backpedals hard and says she has behavioral problems
>says she just "gets assmad and does it" after that
>keeps making conflicting posts.
>keeps comparing self with other snowflakes despite no one asking
Explain why she is not a cow princess?

No. 727

lolcow.farm will be down for maintenance for a short period of time on Friday, May 15. The site may be offline for up to 1 hour, but it should be around 30 minutes.

This will occur at some point within the range of 5:30 PM to 7:30 PM GMT. Timezone conversions:

10:30 AM - 12:30 PM Pacific time
1:30 PM - 3:30 PM Eastern time

Sorry for the inconvenience.

No. 728

Idk how well this would be recieved, but I was thinking that I would kind of like us to have an /x/ board on lolcow.

I've noticed we've recieved a distinct increase in traffic recently and I am always reading about all these spoopy things online like the Elisa Lam case and thinking "wow I'd like to hear lolcow's verdict on this" , but then it doesn't really belong on /pt/ and nor does it really fit on /b/.

Users of lolcow strike me as being into their top spoop and conspiracies, how would others feel about the addition of an /x/?

No. 729

>>728
/b/ is literally anything you want so just make an /x/ thread. jfc we don't need a new board for every single whim.

No. 730

>>729

Well for starters it is not practical to have a single thread containing multitudes of spoopy debates as it would become confusing as fuck if somebody decided they wanted to start discussing the Everest corpses again whilst everybody else is discussing Elisa Lam sandwiched between aliens and chemtrails.

Also are you okay. You sound unnecessarily angry at the proposal of a new board.

No. 731

>>730
Please look at the other new board requests we've had in this thread. Even the Admin has expressed that they don't really want to make new boards besides /b/ and /pt/. (>>37965)
If someone else wants to talk about the Everest corpses, they too can make a new thread instead of clogging the one about Elisa Lam. Alternatively, you can just make one on 8ch.

No. 732

>>731
This. Lolcow is not your new 4chan, please either make a thread in /b/ or go to 8chan. Sorry bro.

No. 733

>>730
You can make more than one thread in /b/ you know.

No. 734

The maintenance downtime was much longer than expected - almost 3 hours - due to reasons completely outside of my control. Sorry for the inconvenience.

No. 735

Sorry, there was another unexpected 30 minutes of downtime just now due to a problem with the datacenter. That should be the last of it.

No. 736

>>735
Thanks, Admin-sama. I have so much vicious bile to spew, and I can't handle it when lolcow goes down.

No. 737

I've seen two bugs, one small one big.

Small:

It's sometimes hard to get rid of the new posts notification in the title if you leave lolcow open in a window and click back into the window.

Big:

There appears to be a memory leak and high cpu usage on a lot of pages (e.g. the shoplifters thread) which causes them to eventually crash if left open in the background. In the Chrome developer tools turn on "show paint rectangles" and "show fps meter" and you can see that on these pages 99% of the page is flashing green every second which indicates constant reflowing.

It's hard to figure out the exact cause with obfuscated code but it might be the trigger warning blinker. It's presumably due to a setInterval accessing offsetWidth, offsetHeight, or getBoundingClientRect as these all cause reflows.

No. 738

>>737
>It's sometimes hard to get rid of the new posts notification in the title if you leave lolcow open in a window and click back into the window.
I've noticed this too and will try to fix it.

>There appears to be a memory leak and high cpu usage on a lot of pages (e.g. the shoplifters thread) which causes them to eventually crash if left open in the background. In the Chrome developer tools turn on "show paint rectangles" and "show fps meter" and you can see that on these pages 99% of the page is flashing green every second which indicates constant reflowing.

I've confirmed the blinking text is what's causing the constant page repainting. I can't confirm it's what's increasing memory and CPU time, but I've replaced the JS (which was effectively toggling display: none on and off infinitely) with pure CSS animations. Tell me if the performance issues are still happening.

>It's hard to figure out the exact cause with obfuscated code

Unobfuscated code is available at https://lolcow.farm/js/

No. 739

Page title new post indicator issue should now be fixed as well.

No. 740

>>738

Most of the memory usage seems to be the ajax poll which I think is just the garbage collector being lazy rather than an actual memory leak. The 1-3% CPU usage is gone though.

Only other big CPU user is GIFs, especially all the banners in this thread. Only solution for that is to hide them when not in view (e.g. opacity 0). I'm surprised that browsers don't optimise this by themselves.

No. 741

>>740
The GC doesn't seem to be kicking in at all, even after like 15 minutes, so I think it is a real memory leak. And it is definitely the AJAX poll. Still trying to determine the best way of fixing it.

No. 742

File: 1432166355688.gif (1.71 MB, 300x100, nokawaii2seehere.gif)

Reguested banner

No. 743

>>742
Excellent

No. 744

>>742
Added.

No. 745

>>742
That was my request!!!! I love you anon!!!

It's so beautiful…

No. 746

Any chance you'll fix the typing on mobile? it's still laggy as heeeck (on Lite too) so now I've started writing my text in a document and copy/paste to lolcow. It's seriously so dreadful. I can't even see the text I type until I stop typing and wait like 4-5 seconds for the lag to stop.

No. 747

>>746
I have never actually noticed this or received a report of this before. Would you mind saying what phone model you have? Mine doesn't have this issue, but it's a pretty recent model.

Also, if you try to post in a thread with under a hundred posts, is it just as laggy as threads with over a thousand posts?

No. 748

>>747
I have this too, but I have a SG3 soooOOO idk I always assumed it was my phone.

No. 749

>>748
That phone isn't too old, it shouldn't be having issues like that. Can you compare the lag between small and large threads, and also see if lite mode helps at all?

No. 750

>>746
I have this problem as well, I thought it was just my slow ass phone. I have a iPhone 4. It tends to have more trouble lagging on threads that are like 900+ posts.
However, I also have an overstuffed memory and most apps do not work well on my phone anyway.

No. 751

I haven't checked it on my phone yet, but is lolcow lagging like crazy for anyone else right now?

No. 752

>>747
You already saw me mentioning it in another thread a while back. I'm on an iPhone 6.. and my internet is quite good.

Any thread is laggy as heck to me. And lite or not doesn't matter, it's the same.

No. 753

>>752
Sorry, I vaguely remembered that but couldn't find a mention of it when searching this thread, so I just assumed I misremembered.

>>751
Has it always seemed slow, or has it only become bad starting this week, or today? When did you start notice it being slow? Is the slowness apparent after you've only had a thread up for a minute or 2, or only slowness initially loading it, or both?

No. 754

>>753
It was just last night, I guess the site was just busy.

No. 755

>>754
Load did not increase significantly yesterday or last night compared to the rest of the week, so I suspect a server issue.

Was it lag in loading pages and submitting posts (where the page was just loading while showing no content, or stuck at "Posting…"), or were threads loaded yet slow in some other way?

No. 756

>>755
The first one. I couldn't get the site to load fully for about an hour before I posted >106539

No. 757

>>756
Sorry about that. I have an uptime monitoring utility, and it did not report any downtime yesterday or today.

Did anyone else have trouble accessing the site last night or within the past few days?

No. 758

>>757
this is a tad late, admin, but i can't access lolcow on my android phone. i've tried opera, i've tried other browsers, still same message.
it's 'secure connection could not be established'. before that, i'd just get messages about how the name didn't match the website or some shit. i forgot the exact word. that was since you switched to https. a while later, it stopped working entirely!
i hope you can fix it bc i really miss browsing in my bed in the morning!

No. 759

>>758
We're using Cloudflare's SSL, which uses only the most modern encryption and authentication algorithms. Some browsers and devices/machines are outdated and do not support these, which will result in those errors.

However, Android phones should all support these algorithms. Usually it's old machines running Windows XP that have this problem.

What Android OS version are you running?

No. 760


No. 761

File: 1432428756024.png (24.31 KB, 1440x164, memory.png)

Within a few days, Lite mode will only show still frame thumbnails for GIFs. This should improve performance for threads that have a lot of GIFs. The change is already in, but due to Cloudflare's caching and browser caching, most people won't see the changes for old GIFs until about 5-7 days pass. For newly posted GIFs, the changes should be seen immediately.

>>740
This is still stumping me. The tests I ran a few days ago did not seem to show memory decreasing, but the heap profile I just ran is showing the GC kicking in quite regularly, with no memory leak at all. I don't know what conditions cause V8's GC to sometimes be lazy and sometimes work properly. This one is over a span of about 20 minutes.

No. 762

>>761

When I was looking into the memory usage I monkeypatched the poll to only use an XMLHttpRequest and purposefully deleted all variables (including wiping the response contents on the response). Yet still memory usage was going up even if I forced garbage collection (there's a button in the timeline to force it) so I can only assume it was something internal to Chrome. If you Google "xmlhttprequest memory leak" a lot of people have reported the same in the past.


I've noticed the slow typing as well but I don't know when it started. I don't remember it being there like 3 months ago when I last posted from mobile.

Chrome on Android 5: typing is fine
Safari 8.3 on iPad: typing is fine
Chrome on iPad: typing is very slow

The slowness is definitely amplified by the length of the thread and also happens on the lite version.

Chrome on iOS is still using UIWebView which doesn't have the Nitro engine plus some other weird bugs. So there's either some javascript running every time a letter is typed or perhaps some CSS property performs terribly on older versions of Webkit.

Problem is there's no way to properly profile remotely.


The SSL problem on Android is going to get worse over the coming year. The PCI DSS requirements have been updated to disallow TLS 1.0 after June 2016. So if you're on an old version of Android that doesn't let you install Chrome you will need to buy a new phone to access any site that accepts payments.

No. 763

>>762

By "only use an XMLHttpRequest" I mean "bypass jQuery and use an XHR directly".

No. 764

Everyone who's having issues with slow typing, laggy scrolling, or other performance issues:

Please post in this thread and say what device, model, and operating system you are using.

Here's an example:

Samsung Galaxy S4
Android 4.4

No. 765

>>759
Android 2.3.6
Samsung Galaxy Ace S5830

thank you for the quick response, admin-sama and may PT's blessing follow your footsteps everywhere you go.

>>760
according to this, i should be alright. must be something other than an issue with Android version.

No. 766

>>764
Samsung Galaxy S3
Android 4.4.2

Thanks for being so dedicated to solving this problem admin-sama.

No. 767

File: 1432593471313.jpg (43.53 KB, 1019x453, berrythread.JPG)

what happened to berry's thread?

No. 768

>>767
Temporary site issue. Thread should be back now, but the URL/thread ID is different, sorry. It's at >>109372

>>765
>>766
No problem. Unfortunately, I can't guarantee that it will be fixed soon. Still working on it.

No. 769

>>768
thank you ♥

No. 770

I've found in posting lately when I click on the post number, it'll show up while I'm typing my reply, but won't show up once I hit send.
I'd have to click on the post number again to make sure I get it to show up in the post. This has been happening for about a week or more.

No. 771

>>770
I believe this may be due to a bug in a recent version of Chrome. Try updating to the very latest Chrome version (click "About Google Chrome" and it should start updating) and tell me if you still see the problem.

No. 772

I made a few Javascript optimizations. Please tell me if you see any improvement in typing speed.

If you don't see an improvement, please specify whether using Lite mode makes any difference in typing speed.

No. 773

>>772
Hey admin-sama this S3 on 4.4.2, I wanted to let you know I still have the same issue even in lite but it might be an issue with Android its self. It seems to have issues with large pages and I've had my browser crash a few times on regular sites.

It may not have anything to do with the board issue but I wanted to give you a heads up, just in case.

No. 774

Hey Admin, I know this might be a stretch but in the past few weeks there has been a quite significant increase in OT threads. Self posting and "i hate this girl wah" type deals. The thread about the bodybuilder was moved to /b/ which was great! Do you think we could establish some sort of rule/voting system to weed out these salty thrads faster? quality over quantity etc.

No. 775

>>111964
I've moved 3 off-topic threads within the past 24 hours, but I agree it is becoming a problem. One reason why some of the threads have been up so long is to give a fair chance for people in favor of the thread and people against it to argue why it should stay or go. Otherwise, it feels too dictatorial of me to move the thread just based on limited info and my own first impressions. Once it becomes clear that the vast majority of unique posters in the thread think it should be moved, and once there are more than 5 such posters, then I usually find it safe to move it.

I'm open to the idea of voting, but it's pretty difficult to manage fair voting on a site like this. Even if you completely ignore the anonymity aspects and assume 1 vote = 1 person, you would really need more than 30% of active posters to vote on each thread that's up for contention, otherwise the vote is heavily susceptible to bias and skewing.

For now, please continue to report off-topic threads as soon as you see them, so I can keep an eye on them and/or move them.

I also just added a new rule for /pt/.

>If you are posting a new thread about someone who isn't widely known, and there are no previous threads about this person, include an explanation in the OP or immediate follow-up posts as to why you consider them to be a lolcow. You should include links, pictures, videos, screenshots, quotes, or other evidence. Threads that do not obey this may be moved to /b/.

No. 776

>>775
Thank you for this, Admin-sama. You are truly the glue that hold this board together. Just wondering, is the new influx of off topic/vendetta posts a correlation to an increase of visits to the board? How many people visit lolcow daily, on average? It's okay if you wouldn't like to answer.

No. 777

>>776
There is a correlation, but that correlation doesn't necessarily mean anything without controlling for a lot of other factors.

There are roughly 6,700 unique visitors per day on average.

Another interesting fact: 1.8 TB of data was transferred in the past 30 days.

No. 778

Hey Admin-sama, I know this would be pretty hard to do, but could you make the Lite mode have some optional 'settings', like some checkbox with options of what scripts it should load and whatnot?

No. 779

>>778
I could do this. However, 3 things for you and anyone else reading this thread:

1. Who else would be interested in this feature?
2. Which script features would you like to use and consider the most important?
3. Which features do you consider unimportant and do not care about?

Unfortunately, it's possible that the features you want are also ones that cause significant performance degradation; in that case you may not have any other option but to choose between missing functionality and poor performance, at least until I make further optimizations to the main site.

No. 780

>>779
1.Anyone who would like to add some functionalities on lite mode without losing too much performance

2.Mostly the options to turn on/off some stuff on lite mode (ex: I find the "quoted posts" and "hover quote" scripts to be very handy, but I never use the arrows or click-expand on images).

3.Anything too fancy, there's no need to overcomplicate it. Checkboxes would be fine.

I understand if you can't work out something like this, but thanks ahead for all that you've done.

No. 781

Admnin-sama, there's a bunch of OT shitposting in the new Pixyteri thread about buttholes. Could you clean the thread up for us? We're trying to talk about making drawings, not shitty buttholes.

No. 782

The auto update and new reply box when you click on a post aren't working for me, did something change or am I just being dumb?

>>781
chill

No. 783

>>782
Both of these features appear to be working fine for me. Note that the quick reply box is disabled on small screens, due to size constraints. If you're using something with a larger screen and have used quick reply with it before, see if you have the same problem with a different browser.

No. 784

>>781
Oh, get over it. Don't ask Admin-sama to clean up a thread because you can't handle the shitposting, that's a waste of their time. Just don't contribute to it and it will disappear eventually.

No. 785

In regards to slow typing on an iPad it seems fixed in MIHTool (free app with Weinre built in) but still slow in Chrome. As far as I know they both use UIWebView.

To find the source of the slow typing it might be worth uploading a bunch of static pages with progressively more javascript and CSS disabled. Which would to an extent tie into >>778.

For what it's worth cloudflare.min.js binds keydown/up events to the whole document so it might be the source. Also localStorage can be unpredictable on mobile. For example Safari in private mode has localStorage enabled but its size set to 0 so normal feature testing doesn't work.

No. 786

>>782
I'm having this problem too, but just on Firefox (38.0.1). It was working fine for me earlier but then it stopped. Seems to work okay on Chrome.

No. 787

the bar at the top with all the page numbers goes all the way across the screen and covers the options at the top. it's not a huge deal but it would be cool if it maybe just had the first 10 pages then the link to the catalog…most of the most active threads kinda stick to the top few anyway.

No. 788

What on Earth is Kiki doing in that one banner where she shakes her head while having a Rilakkuma doll?

No. 789

>>788
she grabbed her rila and did the kkuma.

No. 790

>>787
I agree, that's a good idea. Change has been made.

>>785
I have good ways of testing that internally, though the problem in my case is that I've never experienced slow typing myself across any of my devices or browsers. I'm working with a few other people to try and narrow it down.

No. 798

Is there a chance you can clean up the Tess Munster thread? There are too many people posting their stats, asking for diet tips even after an offtopic thread was made. I would be fine just deleting anything not tess related

No. 802

>>782
>>786
Yeah, having this problem too. I've also been having other problems with Firefox lately so I think it's just the update or something.

No. 803

>>802
It does indeed appear to be an issue with the latest Firefox. You may just have to use Chrome. A recent Chrome update actually broke some features as well, but they released another update to fix that pretty quickly.

No. 885

Updated the rule regarding minimum age.

>You must be at least 14 years old to browse or post. However, all posts should appear as if they were written by an adult. If you are known to be under 18 and are posting in an immature manner, your age may contribute to harsher punishment.


I originally made this rule because I don't really like the whole "underage b&" technicalities on 4chan. If someone makes a perfectly fine post but mentions they are 16, I don't think that means they shouldn't be allowed to use the site. (And I honestly could not care less if a teenager catches a glimpse of someone's boobs or something. If they're on an imageboard they have definitely seen porn before.)

But I also don't want immature 14-year-olds posting garbage everywhere. Or immature 25-year-olds posting garbage everywhere.

I don't care very much about your actual age, but everyone should at least attempt to act like an adult.

No. 901

>>885
I don't care about underagers making posts. But as long as the minimum age is 14, I think that selfposting pictures of yourself should be strongly discouraged, even if the selfposter is 30. There is a lot that can go wrong if you're misled to believe that it is okay to post a picture of yourself to an anonymous imageboard known for making fun of people.

No. 903

sorry if this has been addressed but does anybody else have problems with the display of the site lately? sometimes it looks like the css is missing. (black serif font with blue links on white background)
seems to happen randomly.

i'm using chrome if that makes any difference.

thanks <3

No. 904

>>903
That definitely shouldn't be happening. Has anyone else seen this?

No. 905

File: 1435761083917.jpg (238.86 KB, 534x600, lolcow.jpg)

>> 904
i'm >>903 again - forgot to mention that it doesn't happen in lite mode at all, only in the full version of the site. (which looks like pic related for me right now.)

No. 908

>>905
What kind of Internet connection are you using? You're probably failing to load the stylesheet due to some connectivity problem.

No. 910

So, I'm not sure if admin is familiar with bullyville and Kate gosselin but basically, a reality TV star teamed up with a bullying site to unmask and shame anonymous commenters, some of whom crossed the line, some of whom didn't. I was wondering, what would happen if lolcow was subpoenaed for info re:posters? What is admin's stance on that sort of thing? I guess The TPP thread in /b/ has me wondering about the freedom of speech for anons as well more generally…

No. 911

>>910
I can't make any absolute guarantees, but the server is not hosted in North America. They would likely have to prove a crime or tort was committed in the country in which the server resides. Even in the US, the only things that would really apply here are threats (which are already banned) and libel. Additionally, a subpoena would only be able to cover IPs of specific posts, not every post.

I would fight any subpoena tooth and nail, unless it's of something genuinely criminal and unethical (like CP or death threats). But if I lose that fight, I have no choice but to give up IP addresses. There is no way to hide IPs or store them in a way which would prevent law enforcement from accessing them given a valid subpoena, warrant, or other court order. Only truly anonymous applications, like Tor hidden services, can operate without ever having access to end user IPs.

I believe it is very unlikely this will ever be a problem, and if it does, I will do everything I legally can to prevent users' information from being exposed. But there is certainly a tiny chance it could happen. To stay on the safe side, people should probably avoid posting libel (intentionally false statements you portray as true, e.g. "X cheated on her boyfriend 5 times" if it's false). Even if you do though, the chances of anything happening are minuscule.

No. 912

Admin, your link on the Bibi/Himeka OP is a bit broken. It's linking https://lolcow.farm/mod.php?/pt/res/51205.html#133414 instead of >>133414 .

No. 913

>>912
Oops. Fixed.

No. 914

>>911
Thanks, Admin. I try to be careful with what I post generally. I will say that I worry about some of the minors posted here (particularly in the ED thread) because of the famous "cyberbullying" cases that have been publicized in the US and those girls are already fragile, it seems. Anyway, I appreciate your efforts to protect users.

No. 915

I'm looking for a new default spoiler pic. It should be 300x300, not animated, and related to lolcow in some way.

No. 916

File: 1436457883305.png (120.89 KB, 300x300, SPOILER.png)

>>915
Too simple?

Btw, can I make a suggestion?
Could you add the "[First 100 posts] [Last 50 posts]" script to lolcow? (example: http://kusabax.cultnet.net/sug/)I don't know if the software you're running support this like kusaba does, but it would really help, especially on threads with 1000+ replies.

No. 917

File: 1436458007845.jpg (53.64 KB, 300x300, SPOILER2.jpg)

>>916
.jpg/lighter version.

No. 918

Admin, please add a red message on /pt/ (like the "Chat with fellow farmers at chat.lolcow.farm — see /meta/ for details") urging new people to read the rules, especially linking Board Guidelines.
Also, you should add some explanation of what lolcows are and aren't (ex: photoshopping and being ugly doesn't make someone a lolcow)

No. 919

>>916
>>917
I like it a lot, but I almost wonder if it's a bit too lewd for a spoiler pic. Maybe make the spoiler bar a bit vertically bigger on both sides?

>Could you add the "[First 100 posts] [Last 50 posts]" script to lolcow? (example: http://kusabax.cultnet.net/sug/) I don't know if the software you're running support this like kusaba does, but it would really help, especially on threads with 1000+ replies.


So Kusaba is pretty standard imageboard software, where something like that is really easy to add and modify at whim. Lolcow's board software is based on a similar codebase to 8chan's. Instead of boards, threads, and posts being pulled from a database and displayed as you viewed them, they're actually generated ahead of time and stored as static files. This means there is no easy to view only a section of a thread, without having separate code to generate separate files with only a subset of posts in a thread. It complicates things a lot.

When I upgrade the software to something closer to what 8chan's running, which is already publicly available, then I can do a last 100 posts option, and maybe later do some more advanced things. But I've made a lot of custom edits to the software, both at the frontend and backend, so I have to manually transport the code to the newest codebase and make sure it doesn't conflict. I am currently about halfway done with that. I don't know when it'll finish though.

>>918
>Admin, please add a red message on /pt/ (like the "Chat with fellow farmers at chat.lolcow.farm — see /meta/ for details") urging new people to read the rules, especially linking Board Guidelines.
Done.

>Also, you should add some explanation of what lolcows are and aren't (ex: photoshopping and being ugly doesn't make someone a lolcow)

I plan on doing this. I have not yet decided exactly how to define lolcow criteria (it may be more difficult than you think), but I'm likely going to start making the rules somewhat more strict over time in a series of steps, culminating in eventually splitting /pt/ into 2 boards.

No. 920

File: 1436517840959.jpg (48.4 KB, 300x300, SPOILER.jpg)

>>919
Better?

No. 921

Can an admin or a cowhand ban the asian poster? They posted like 40 pics of asian girls in the other white thread while race baiting whites with epithets.

I made a new thread and they're spamming still. Please ban them. Or is it ok 'cos it's whites?

>>14074

No. 922

>>921
The whole debate is fucking stupid. You sound stupid, all those threads should be deleted because it's basically baiting people to post.

I understand that it's supposed to be /b/, and anything goes. But it ends up just shitting up the website. You guys complain about "muh pull" but you aren't any better.

Ban race debates, especially when it happens in /pt/.

No. 923

>>922
Ok, it's stupid to you, but not to us. Being 'stupid' or 'because I don't like it' is not a good reason to ban something.

Anyway otherwise the race stuff overflows to other threads.

No. 924

>>923
Where in my post did I mention it was stupid ? I disapprove of those threads because it brings obvious baits and useless debated and arguments.

I'm 99% it's important to you, because you use it in retaliation to the other threads about X race being posted.

I still stand for these type of threads to be banned, or at least heavily moderated.

No. 925

>>924
>I still stand for these type of threads to be banned, or at least heavily moderated.
I agree with you. Why aren't these threads considered flood already? Be asian, white or black shitposting, it's the same dumb shit that could be contained within one thread. Just ban this crap already.

No. 926

I also want all the race debate and the "attractive -insert race here- girls/people" threads banned.

if not banned, then a new board should be made to contain it. its completely ruining /b/

there used to be interesting topics there, like makeup, cute rooms, advice type threads, the doll thread etc. but its all being drowned out by this race crap. if its just a small number of people perpetuating this shit, then ban them, if it doesn't seem like banning will work, then make a containment board and ban race shit from /b/ please! its the only way.

No. 927

Is anyone else not seeing /g/ on the upper left corner?

No. 929

>>927
Refresh the page twice.

No. 930

Hey admin, you need to update the rules since makeup/girltalk discussion belongs to /g/ now. Also, the rules page isn't showing some boards (/meta/ and /g/).

No. 931

>>930
Weird, /meta/ should have been there. I added the /g/ rules.

Are all the boards appearing for you in the rules now?

No. 934

File: 1436834287472.gif (768.43 KB, 300x100, ashleigh-final.gif)

I made a banner for everyone involved in the Ashleigh thread

No. 935

>>934
Good job. Could you add some sort of reference to lolcow, in text or image form?

No. 937

File: 1436835123785.gif (805.42 KB, 300x100, ashleigh-lolcow.gif)

>>935
How's this?

No. 938

>>931
Yes, thank you.

No. 939

>>931
Sorry, forgot to mention that you didn't fix this info on /b/'s guideline:
>Discuss anything and everything. Try to keep lolcow threads and posts to /pt/. Makeup, clothing, and /cgl/ discussion belongs here.
Sorry about nitpicking, you are doing a wonderful job.

No. 940

>>939
Oops, missed that. Fixed.

>>937
Added.

No. 941

File: 1436859258400.gif (119.85 KB, 300x100, final-2.gif)

Not sure if this is lolcow-relevant enough but I thought it was pretty funny

No. 942

>>937
just poppin into meta to comment on the new banner.
This is great, do more.

No. 943

Rule change: minimum lurking/posting age has been increased from 14 to 16.

>>941
Added.

No. 944

>>943
why the age change?

No. 945

>>944
Although I still think "14+ but act like an adult or you'll be banned" is a more reasonable rule in many ways, the fact is that it creates an "image" issue.

By explicitly having that rule, it may give the impression to 14/15-year-olds that this is a good site for them to join and is in line with the interests of young teenagers. Too much of that and the whole place becomes infested.

And a bit of that did start to happen in /b/, so I decided it's just not worth it to try and preserve such a low minimum age. 16 seems like a good balance.

No. 951

I started >>>/pt/87801 a few months ago when I was new to the farm, and an anon pointed out that the original post I made makes the thread seem like it belongs in /b/, and while I agree, I think the thread as a whole still belongs in /pt/, as some of the "idols" in there are pretty lulzy (26-year-old unemployed mother trying to start a net idol group wit ha bunch of weeby teenagers, a member of Furi-Furi came to the thread to defend her group, etc.).

Could my original post be changed from the dumb questions to just "Weeby Wannabe Idols General" or "Aspiring Aidorus" or something, or should the thread be moved to /b/ (if aspiring aidorus don't actually count as lolcows, that is)?

(…I'm still not entirely sure what defines a lolcow and I apologize.)

No. 1024

This thread should now only be used for technical help and suggestions, and new feature requests. Technical changes I've made will be posted here.

Discuss rule changes in >>1023
Suggest new banners in >>962

No. 1025

Threads will now automatically lock shortly after the bump max of 1200 posts has been reached.

>>951
I moved the thread and changed the subject to "Aspiring Aidorus".

No. 1027

One small problem, /g/ doesn't appear on mobile. The site does, but the button on top or anything, isn't there. It doesn't matter, since I can just replace the URL, but yeah. Letting you know.

No. 1032

>>929
Meh, it still shows up pretty randomly. Sometimes it's there, sometimes it's not.

No. 1035

/g/ not showing up at the top is due to Cloudflare's aggressive caching. I'll try to adjust it but it still might not show up for a few more days for some people.

No. 1047

Is anyone still experiencing the missing /g/ issue?

I did a few things to make pages and threads look better for devices with small screens, like phones. This included shrinking the Youtube embed size, because in some cases they were stretching the page.

Sorry if they're too small to be very useful anymore, but I get the feeling most people just click the videos and view them on Youtube anyway.

No. 1064

>>920
Sorry to be a bother, but could you resize this to 230x230 and also make it a PNG?

I tried to resize it myself but the text became slightly artifacty, and I don't want to ruin it because it's great.

No. 1066

File: 1437443327439.png (70.04 KB, 934x230, multispoiler.png)

>>1064
Damn, I forgot to save the original, so I just edited on top of this .png >>916
I also added some stuff, just crop what you like the most.

No. 1086

I noticed post submission felt like it was getting slow starting a few months ago. It seemed like every week it was getting slower and slower for a post to actually go through after you press "New Topic" or "New Reply".

I finally realized there was some absolutely terribly written code bundled with the default board software that is run every time a post is submitted, in a way that would make it even slower relative to the number of posts in boards. I modified it slightly, and now posting should feel considerably faster in all boards.

No. 1089

Admin-sama,

- Threads with a lot of text are still laggy as heck from my iPhone when I try to write a reply (like this one)

>>100
- From my phone, the timestamps on /b/ are showing as US times, and the timestamps in /pt/ shows as "4 hours ago" + local time

No. 1091

>>1089
Oh, and /b/ doesn't have any minimize button on threads so one is forced to scroll through all the previews.

No. 1093

>>1089
>>1091
Sounds like Javascript somehow isn't loading when you visit /b/. Try refreshing the page a few times, and try restarting the browser.

As for slow typing, try these things:

* Especially on devices like phones, threads need some time to load. If you try typing in a field while a thread is still loading, typing will be extremely laggy. Try waiting 45 seconds (probably less) for a thread to load before typing. Often there is some visual indicator that a thread is loading, like a bar at the bottom or a loading icon.

* See if Lite mode helps at all.

And finally, I'll be adding options to view only the last 50 or 100 posts in a thread in the future, which should solve this problem as well.

Sorry for the inconvenience, I know the site doesn't work that great on some mobile devices at the moment.

No. 1094

>>1066
Forgot to say thank you for the spoiler pics. I went with the second one.

No. 1095

>>1091
>>1093
Must be why I noticed from my phone (dunno about desktop), but it seems to work now (the timestamp + minimize thing)

No. 1096

File: 1437932262369.jpg (31.01 KB, 952x417, gah.JPG)

I've been getting this all day. Sometimes when I come to the site, but if I can see the page, it does it when I click on "click to expand".

No. 1097

>>1096
We had some maintenance yesterday, and your browser's probably caching the page.

First try using a different browser (or use incognito mode if Chrome/Firefox), then try refreshing the page 3 times in the main browser to see if it goes away.

No. 1098

>>1097
I cleared cookies and it's back to normal. Thanks.

No. 1102

Idk how Admin feels about this idea but I feel that the board would benefit from a search function at this point.

It's gotten so large now that I'm regularly seeing people referencing older drama/images and saying "oh this was mentioned in one of the older threads", but, as in the case of Dakota or Kirsten threads, they're so large and numerous it's a nightmare to find anything within them.

No. 1103

>>1102
This will be added and has been planned for a while, but I have no ETA as to when it will be done, sorry.

No. 1116

I want to query why my Cara Delevingne thread was locked and moved from /g/ to /b/?

/b/ is for generic, non-specific discussion whereas /g/ is for discussion pertaining to feminine interests right? I'm just confused because I don't understand how a thread surrounding a female model is more relevant to /b/ than /g/.
Even in the rules it states that /g/ is for "Fashion/style/clothing".

It's not really a big deal but I'm really funny about having things organised and I don't understand the desicion.

No. 1117

>>1116
>If you plan on making a thread to discuss a contentious issue, or to criticize a person, community, place, issue, or subject, or to discuss a specific person or small group (regardless of it being positive or negative), it should go in /b/ or /pt/, not here.

Admittedly, the delineation between /b/ and /g/ isn't very clear. In my opinion most things should go in /b/, and only a small specific subset should go in /g/.

No. 1118

>>1117

Oh okay, thanks for clarifying that.
I'll bear that in mind for future reference.

No. 1119

>>798
Hey so are you never even going to at least respond to this? The tess holliday has had an influx of shitposters and people who just bitch about how fat they are. It is /b/ material and you don't do anything about it. People don't like when the thread gets derailed.

No. 1121

>>1119

>>113781

>>113810
>>113814
>>113832
>>113862
>>113867
>>113869
>>113878
>>113895
>>113902
>>113905
>>113906
>>113913
>>113995
>>114020
>>114146
>>114289
>>144510
>>144514
>>144516
>>144520
>>144524
>>144583

Pretty much all this shit.

No. 1122

>>1119
Made a post telling people to stop. Anyone who continues will receive a temporary /pt/ ban.

No. 1125

Can somebody ban the male shitposter Boy !!6oPyg0gPwI who came in with tonight's robot influx?
He is contributing literally nothing to the board and using it as a medium to attentionwhore by spamming his face pics.

Also I fucking hate trips/namefags on lolcow.

No. 1126

I just want to say you guys are handling this "robot" invasion really well. It's annoying the fuck out of me but you're being really patient. Kudos!

No. 1131

>>1125
This, and man just like the whole front page of /b/ is covered with that shit.

No. 1135

>>1119
>>1125
>>1126
>>1131
From now on please use >>1134 for discussion and issues regarding moderation or the content on the site. This thread should only be used for technical issues and suggestions.

No. 1140

File: 1440003530054.jpg (134.46 KB, 1074x901, image.jpg)

Admin-sama, halp ;____; i cant bost on /g/

No. 1141

>>1140
Try refreshing and posting it again.

No. 1143

Not sure if this is the right place to put this, but would it ever be possible to have the banner gif link back to the homepage?

No. 1144

>>1143
I could, but does anyone actually bother looking at the homepage? Might make more sense to have it just link to /pt/.

No. 1149

>>1144
I do. It's nice to get a gauge of what board's active.

Also do you think you could include thread titles for catalog browsing as well?

No. 1150

>>1149
Yes, that will be added soon. The catalog will be replaced entirely with a better catalog display.

No. 1151

Hey Admin I think the time has finally come to create a board for lesser/unknown/new cows.

I feel like /b/ has really grounded itself as an individual board with regular, sustained content at this point and daily I am seeing threads being created or moved over from /pt/ that are getting lost in a deluge of other threads and so don't really get a chance for investigation.

I think a dedicated board would be very beneficial, although idk what you could call it.

(oh god actually please call it /kiki/ if you make one).

No. 1154

how does one apply to become a mod?

No. 1160

>>1143
This is now done. Clicking the banner will take you to the front page.

No. 1161

>>1151
We could call the lesser/new cows "lolcalves" :')

No. 1162

>>1161

>lolcalves


NUOH.
MAI.
GAWD.

No. 1163

>>1150
>new catalog

Aw yeah. Can we have the option to pin threads that interest us, like cuckchan? I'm still having the quick reply box not open in Firefox– is this an ongoing thing? I have other browsers, but I just use FF from habit.

I've also been noticing a lot of people trying to sage, but I'm not sure it's working? Can we add more board functions to the site usage information page?
Admin-sama, you've been attentive to us lower farmers. You're pretty cool.

No. 1165

>>1163
>pin threads
Like catalog pinning? I'll add it to the list of stuff to do, but probably won't be added for a while.

>sage

Sageing works and always has worked. Some threads just move fast, and some people may not know how to do it right. I think I might leave that one out of the site usage info, to be honest.

>Firefox quick reply

Just fixed this. Tell me if it's working now. You may have to refresh a page once or twice to clear the cache.

No. 1166

>>1160
Awesome!!!

No. 1170

First for /snow/.

I witness you Admin, you cheeki breeki.

No. 1172

File: 1440362603007.png (71.88 KB, 604x246, 1384262888277.png)

>>1165
>Like catalog pinning? I'll add it to the list of stuff to do, but probably won't be added for a while.
Yes! Sometimes I get the wild disappearing thread in the catalog and am autistic about having to search to find it.

>Just fixed this. Tell me if it's working now. You may have to refresh a page once or twice to clear the cache.

Works perfectly now. Admin-sama, you're the boss.

No. 1213

Still working on the changes suggested in this thread.

Someone else suggested that I add 8chan /girltalk/'s stylesheet as an option. You can now use it by choosing the style from the style selector in the bottom right of any page.

No. 1260

File: 1443284410820.jpeg (18.95 KB, 500x281, scully-facepalm.jpeg)

I'm requesting leave for the set of "cute white girls/black girls/Asian girls" threads to be recreated in /g/ as opposed to /b/ in order to rectify an ongoing problem with them.

I think that the threads overall theme is more relevant to /g/ in the first place as they're often beauty/fashion centric, although due to the fact that race posting is excluded from /g/ that's likely the reason they were placed in /b/.

This has given rise to a new problem unfortunately being that people have been going in to the other threads and attempt to spam, derail or destroy the other threads for reasons I can only base within racial animosity, and they have entirely free reign to do so given the fact that raceposting isn't barred within /b/.

I want to recreate them in /g/ where people can feel free to submit to them without fear of the threads being invaded and destroyed by racists, and where if people do come in to try and stir up racial animosity, they can be reported and dealt with appropriately in order to discourage future shitposting.

The threads as a whole are a really good concept and I often frequent the one relevant to my own race in order to pick up inspiration and beauty tips, but at present it's becoming impossible on account of the rampant racism and shitposting and people invading the other threads and back and forth again and again in an attempt to racially one-up-another.

No. 1280

I see you've implemented a redirection to all links being posted here because you want to maintain the secrecy of this site (at the risk of sounding like a newfag, which specific communities, whose admins you're afraid will expose lolcow.farm, are you trying to hide this site from?). But I find the redirection itself to be very privacy-invading (I don't want annonylink to know every URL I click) and annoying on top of that (I open most youtube links with mpv and overwriting those links is interfering with the way I set up my browser to handle those links). Can you just remove clickable hyperlinks and prompt the users to install a referrer spoofing addon instead?

No. 1281

>>1280
Actually now that I think about it, removing hyperlinks won't make handling youtube links easier for my browser. Nevermind.

Still that redirection thing is pretty annoying.

No. 1282

>>1281
>removing hyperlinks won't make handling youtube links easier for my browser
ahahahahaha it actually does work after all disregard what I said I'm a retard.

No. 1283

>>1280
>at the risk of sounding like a newfag, which specific communities, whose admins you're afraid will expose lolcow.farm, are you trying to hide this site from?

I would say it's primarily Tumblr users who have their blogs linked here and are also using some sort of hit tracker. But it works for all sorts of usecases.

I do not intend to remove it.

No. 1295

>>1283
If it's just tumblr, can't you remove them for at least youtube links not on /pt/?

No. 1296

>>1295
I'd prefer to rewrite all URLs with it.

Why isn't MPV able to follow 302 redirects?

Also, if you're manually copying and pasting the links anyway, then it's only one extra step to visit the link first to copy the final URL.

No. 1301

File: 1443942571469.png (3.52 KB, 388x103, asldkaslkd.png)

>>1296
>Why isn't MPV able to follow 302 redirects?
Dunno. That part is usually probably handled by youtube-dl.

>Also, if you're manually copying and pasting the links anyway,

I don't do that. I highlight the url and select "open with mpv" in the context menu. This works even if the link isn't clickable.


>I'd prefer to rewrite all URLs with it.

Okay but why? You said it's only the tumblr users being posted on /pt/ that's the problem. And when you post youtube videos through pic related there's no redirection from anonylink.

No. 1302

>>1301
>You said it's only the tumblr users being posted on /pt/ that's the problem.
I said primarily, not only.

You're right though, it isn't really necessary to do the rewriting for Youtube links. Going forward, all new Youtube links won't be prefixed. Prior links still have their prefix.

youtube-dl should handle redirects, by the way.

No. 1304

>>1302
Awesome. Thanks.

No. 1319

Partway through setting up this thread: >>190092

it stopped letting me post any images. I keep getting a "failed to resize image" pop up. the images that I am trying to post are the same size or smaller than the ones already posted so I'm not sure what is going on.

I'm using Google Chrome, but I'm going to switch browsers and see if that helps. :(

No. 1320

>>1319
It looks like I can post images that I save directly, but no screencaps or anything edited in any way. Switching browsers did nothing.

No. 1321

>>1320
I figured out a way around it if I save them as pngs, close everything, and resave back to jpegs. I have no idea why that works and I am sorry for spamming up this thread, admin-sama.

No. 1322

>>1321
8gag has this problem too. It's a tinyboard issue

No. 1425

Does this site have midline greentext? If not, can we please implement it pretty please?

No. 1750

Can we get visible thread subjects in the catalogues please?
Trying to find a specific thread on /pt/ without the subject visible can be a nightmare sometimes.

No. 1751

>>1750
On the to-do list.

No. 1766

I think we have visitors.

No. 1767

>>1766
We do their shitting up /pt/

No. 1841

Why was >>17797 that thread in /b/ deleted? Did the thread started delete it? Goddammit, I had some saucy shit to post

Any chance to restore it?

No. 1842

>>1841
It was moved to >>>/snow/17179.

No. 1878

What's going on with the "she's cute/super cute" postings in the CL or whatever thread in snow?

No. 1879

>>1878

lol, read through the thread and you'll understand.

No. 1881

>>1879
I did mysides.jpg
Thanks admin

No. 1882

Please add a feature allowing users to access Wayback links like with archive.is links. Wayback Machine is like archive.is but both have their benefits.

No. 1883

>>1882

In other words, every link has an "Archived Copy" link right next to it, right? It happens to link to archive.is. Well, I was thinking there could be a Wayback link too

No. 1884

>>1882
What advantages does it have over archive.is?

No. 1891

>>1884

It allows easier browsing between web pages, Javascript, and flash too. archive.is captures seem to be just static.

No. 1979

When I click reply on a thread in snow, the page flips (you'd need a mirror to be able to read it, basically)

No. 1980

>>1979
check the url bar

No. 2022

I just built a new computer and I can't see the replies to a post at the top right. I also cannot highlight a post that someone replies to when hovering over the post number. This does not occur on mobile, so is there something like JavaScript I need to download in order to see this again?

No. 2023

>>2022
Sounds like Javascript isn't loading. Make sure you don't have Lite mode enabled. (Domain should be lolcow.farm, and not lite.lolcow.farm.)

No. 2031

I keep getting a message that my post looks automated and is being discarded. What causes it? My post were manual. Why can't we use a captcha?

No. 2033

>>2031
It's just a bug that occasionally occurs. Try refreshing and posting again, and see if that fixes it.

No. 2058

File: 1452367430503.png (418.65 KB, 1080x1920, Screenshot_2016-01-09-19-22-11…)

Hey, on lolcow's mobile site the arrow that normally takes you back to the top of the page has been gone for nearly two days now, only the down arrow remains.

No. 2059

>>2058
Fixed. You may have to refresh once or twice to see it again.

No. 2060

>>2058

Also when viewing a board but not inside a thread the down arrow takes you up.

No. 2061

>>2060
Fixed that too.

No. 2062

>>2059

Oh, as soon as I posted >>2060 it got fixed.

Thanks Admin!

No. 2063

File: 1452475646039.jpg (67.02 KB, 540x390, tumblr_ns68mi6EXC1qgthdfo2_540…)

I just wanted to say how much I love this site. Thank you admin for hosting it and giving us a place to talk, cry, whine and laugh. I think I speak for all of us when I say I really appreciate it.

And thank you for being a fair admin and for handling all the shitposting and craziness that happens on this site.

Also, you should consider ads to help with hosting costs!

No. 2078

how do you you sage?
do you put it in the subject section?
i'll try here

No. 2079

>>2078
does it go in the email section?

No. 2080

>>2079

Yes.

No. 2096

Hey Admin,

I've created threads like this on cuckchan in the past and they always end up being great fun all around.

>>>/b/60617

Problem is on lolcow I've realised that referencing a post that does not yet exist does not retroactively link once the post has been created like it does on cuckchan.

Is there anyway to fix this?

No. 2097

>>2
I HAVE A COOL IDEA FOR A FEATURE

How about an oeaki? Like a thing where we can draw stuff, maybe iscribble style, or more imageboard oeaki style.

No. 2109

>>2096
I replied in that thread days ago.

>>2097
I might add it at some point.

No. 2122

File: 1453818879141.png (308.22 KB, 443x273, ssss.png)

>>2109
It's a cool idea potentially! This and you should include some way for us to donate, to pay for server costs and ramen!

No. 2124

>>2122
Donations aren't needed, but thanks.

No. 2136

Sorry for spamming with ideas for the site admin but if I keep them locked up inside they'll turn into shitposting

How about for the /cream/ thread with best posts that you made, we make a thing where people can vote for the best/funniest comments? I've come across some really funny or plain weird comments, and it would be more efficient if there was some way to 'report' these comments as we come across them, so they can be posted in that thread.

No. 2143

>>2136
Just post them in >>>/cream/6. It seems silly to add a whole new button for such a rare case when it's pretty easy to link a post in a thread.

No. 2147

Right sorry if this has been suggested before, but it's really getting on my tits. This board has turned into 99% weebs, is there any chance in the future of making a whole seperate section for just weeby cows? They're fucking everywhere, it skeeves me out.

No. 2148

hey a technical question

sometimes it says that the file is too big, and I'm guessing it's because of the dimensions not actual file size. I wanted to upload a longish image, and that was an issue. Iono if it's worth fixing or fixable, but just letting you know in case it's useful for whatever

No. 2152

>>2147
>is there any chance in the future of making a whole seperate section for just weeby cows?
No.

>>2148
>sometimes it says that the file is too big, and I'm guessing it's because of the dimensions not actual file size. I wanted to upload a longish image, and that was an issue. Iono if it's worth fixing or fixable, but just letting you know in case it's useful for whatever

There shouldn't be a restriction on the dimensions. What's the actual size of the file in MB?

No. 2160

>>2152
1.21 I believe, so that might be it, thanks admin!

No. 2161

>>2160
The max size should be 20 MB, so that can't be it. Can you upload the picture to imgur and link it here so I can take a look?

No. 2162

File: 1454895248668.jpg (130.3 KB, 196x3686, sdBaYME.jpg)

>>2161
I think imgur had to compress it in size (since it's no longer readable) but yeah I'll try uploading it in a smaller size to lolcow

thank you and sorry for bothering you with silly things

No. 2163

>>2162
Fixed.

No. 2246

Sometimes when I'm browsing, a broken image comes up as the banner.

No. 2256

Admin when I post from firefox I get a message saying "Your request looks automated; Post discarded." this never happened until very recently. Did you change anything?

No. 2293

this isn't mentioned on the info page or in the rules - do trips work on this site? if yes, are they (incl. secure/doubletrips) generated the same way as on 4chan? if no, could adding them be considered? thinking of moving discussion about a scammer here due to /cgl/ moderation becoming asshurt about it, and using a trip to identify the person leading the cause (collecting info, running warning blogs etc.) would be very useful.

No. 2294

>>2293
Perhaps you should test it.

No. 2296

To disable the Lolcow Simulator™, hover (or, for phones, tap) over a post. After you do so, it should become clear how to see the original post.

Note: You may have to refresh the page once or twice beforehand to reset your cache, otherwise it may not work. You only need to do that once.

No. 2297

>>2296
How long will this last?

No. 2307

>>2297
Forever. Welcome to the new Lolcow.

No. 2309

>>2307
I, for one, am excited for the dawning of a new age. hail admin-sama.

seriously, let's just keep it like this. finally we can live up to the rest of the internet's expectations.

No. 2310

>>2296
>Lolcow Simulator™
This is amazing, admin. I think you have peered into the dark pettiness of our hearts and shown us what you saw there. Pixy-desu would be proud. gomen

No. 2315

spoilered text

No. 2316

>>2296
at first I thought there was one extremely bitter retard commenting multiple times in a thread.

No. 2317

It took me way longer than necessary to realize what was going on.

No. 2318

>>2309
-chuckles aloud-, funny enough I think this is how PULL views us anyway.
>>2317
Ditto. I was wondering what was going on until I posted and then I had my a-ha moment. I kind of want it to be like the CL thread with the so cute comments tho.

No. 2320

>>2317
>>2318

Glad I am not the only one, ha!

No. 2321

>>2296
Is there a way to use the sure with a mobile while this crap is on?

No. 2322


No. 2323

>>2322
Its not working.

No. 2324

>>2323
>Note: You may have to refresh the page once or twice beforehand to reset your cache, otherwise it may not work. You only need to do that once.

Did you do that?

No. 2325

>>2297
It will be turned off sometime Saturday (US time).

No. 2328

>>2325
see you then

No. 2329

This would be the perfect time for a cow/snowflake to take screencaps and talk about what mean bullies we are, to be honest.

No. 2332

>>2329

god, I literally hope you get chlamydia

No. 2334

>>2332

Your vagina yeast could bake 700 scones, cunt.

>tfw i'm saving this for future use


a-admin-sama, can we bring this feature back occasionally? like once every week or something. or maybe every other day.

or every day.

No. 2335

>>2334

Well it'd be a surefire way of shutting newfags out.
Can you imagine people coming here and screenshotting the filter replies, posting it to their little Tumblr blogs and being like "omg I CAN'T believe how rude and horrible people are! All they do is insult each other!".

No. 2336

File: 1459621008742.jpg (8.02 KB, 225x224, download.jpg)

>>2334
It's been fun tbh. Seeing people rage because they don't get it is great.

No. 2337

>>2334
>>2335
Admin should bring it back when they do another hell week.

No. 2338

>>2337

`Indefinite hellweek is in effect.`

No. 2340

I propose Mayhem Monday where the lolcow filter is switched on every Monday for 1-2 hours at indeterminable periods.

It's a fucking marvelous newfag dissuasion mechanic and does rile people up the good and proper like.

No. 2343

I love the messages that it generates. I would read a thread of it.

But, I don't love that the reveal doesn't always work (for me anyway) and that the site seems to lag because of it. It inevitably affects conversation, and conversation is what I come here for… so, I don't want to read through this (agreed: funny) shit every time I come here.

In the April Fool tradition, the joke is played before midday on April 1. It's well into April 3 where I live.

What's most interesting to me is that you've chosen to stymie conversation on your own website, for so long, seemingly for a gag. is it really that you not enjoy what you've created?

No. 2344

>>2343
^do (missing)

No. 2345

>>2296
This is amazing. The messages in the threads are hilarious. I didn't understand what was happening at first though. I reported a few posts because I thought it was some shitposter.

This would be a great way to get newfags out, though.

No. 2346

>>2343
I said I would turn it off Saturday, US time. And I did.

>is it really that you not enjoy what you've created?

The quality of the simulator is definitely far more entertaining than the real posts.

Are threads lagging just in general, or only when you click the posts to reveal the originals?

Maybe next time I do it, I won't put a reveal option. That'll resolve the lag, and the issue of people complaining (since no one will be able to see the complaints).

No. 2347

If you'd like to keep playing with the simulator, check out >>>/manure/85.

I may add new features over time, including something that applies to specific parts of posts to keep an argument on-topic.

In a day or 2, I'll highlight the bot-generated posts with a different color. In the meantime, it'll be funny to watch people try to tell which are which.

No. 2348

>>2346
The nearly full threads are the only ones that seem to lag for me. And it's only when it's trying to load the real text.

No. 2349

>>2348
Nothing can be done about that, really.

No. 2350

>>2346
>I said I would turn it off Saturday, US time. And I did.
Actually you initially dropped in a message into the thread I was in and said we were dumb (I won't look for it to quote because the thread is now a laggy mess). The front page notice came later.

>The quality of the simulator is definitely far more entertaining than the real posts.

Exactly my point then? I very much like the simulator, and I can see how you have enjoyed deploying it. But you don't enjoy what goes on here- that's interesting. Why do you keep it going?

>Are threads lagging just in general, or only when you click the posts to reveal the originals?

At the moment both - in a thread where there are a mix of fake and real posts, but before it was only if I tried to reveal the posts. Reveal worked only 50% of the time for me.

>Maybe next time I do it, I won't put a reveal option. That'll resolve the lag, and the issue of people complaining (since no one will be able to see the complaints).

It's your site to treat as you please. You have gotten a lot of good feedback in the last day and I'm prepared to accept that I'm the odd one out in thinking its unfunny. I suspect that's because I'm older than most who post here and don't come for the shitposting.

No. 2351

>>2350
oops, I meant to write:

…said we were dumb (paraphrasing, I won't look for it to quote…

No. 2352

>>2350
>Actually you initially dropped in a message into the thread I was in and said we were dumb
No I didn't. At least, not that I can find.

>At the moment both - in a thread where there are a mix of fake and real posts, but before it was only if I tried to reveal the posts.

How about now? You may have to refresh a few times.

Also, are you sure you aren't just confusing it with the normal lag that large threads have?

No. 2353

>>2352
The only thread that lags for me when switching is the Palermo thread. And that's just a long thread.
Who cares. Everybody needs to chill out.

No. 2354

>>2350
You're not the only one who thinks it wasn't funny. I'm glad it's turned off already.

No. 2355

>>2346
>The quality of the simulator is definitely far more entertaining than the real posts.

It's funny because it's true.

No. 2356

>>2347
does it do anything to images?

No. 2357

FYI, never had a reveal option here. (on Chrome)

No. 2358

Be sure you're not in Lite mode, and refresh 1-2 times before trying to reveal the posts.

No. 2360

>>2340
I'd be happy if nasolabial folds was permanently wordfiltered to big meaty claws, or something like that.

No. 2364

>>2360

YES.
YES.
YESSSSSS .

No. 2369

Can someone explain why >>259009 has IDs ? Sorry if this a newfag question.(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 2382

>>2381
Oops cnnut delet the boolying post sorry
>>>/pt/260040

No. 2383

>>2382
>>2381

RUSE ME ONCE, SHAME ON I
RUSE ME TWICE ANON, I FUCKIN' DARE U

No. 2384

>>2369
Wait what? I don't think I'm banned. Samefagging but it was a rather innocent question. Badly formatted, sure. Or is this a joke?
I'm confused.(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 2387

>>2384
I'm guessing you got banned for falling for an obvious troll

No. 2388

>>2387

tbf I fell for it too, but only because I know that I could be stupid enough to gloss over a settings button on a site for over 2 years.

No. 2416

>>2384
I guess, seems harsh is all.

No. 2423

>Feature Suggestion
Hey, admin-sama. I noticed your recent post on the Venus/Margo thread about the 'OT' or 'blog post' comments, and I just wanted to throw my two cents in on this subject.
Banning users who create this sort of content–or simply deleting the posts–seems like the most obvious solution, but an extreme one. However, I agree that these posts are unnecessary and generally clog up or derail the lolcow/snowflake threads rather than contributing any useful or relevant information. Personally, I think it's unlikely that these kinds of '32-inch-waist-chan' posters will ever be completely eradicated, but maybe there are some ways to cope with 'em, anyways.
I'm not a programmer, but I was wondering if, instead of trying to discourage this behavior in specific threads, we simply add a filter or a 'sage' clickable option in the text-entry field to hide off-topic posts for users who don't care to see them. Janitors could use the thirty-two-inch-waist sticker to replace off-topic/personal posts until clicked if anon forgets to include the keywords (and it's distracting enough that it's reported by other users)
It's probably not a high-ranking concern right now, but I figured that I'd make my suggestion here since I seem to usually have a hard time catching you on the chat. Thanks for reading!

No. 2424

>>2423
I should also probably make it clear that this suggestion was made with the assumption that indefinite hellweek will eventually end?
But also we could just continue indefinitely on this blazing crazy train, ever-questing for our promised land of milk and salt. das cool too

No. 2425

>>2423
This would be trivial to add, but it would require each user to manually and individually hide every off-topic post they see.

Completely defeats the point and gives even more power to the blogposters.

No. 2426

Admin-sama, did you by any chance ban(like, completely?) any russian anons lately? I've been unable to visit lolcow for the past two days(connection timeout) until we added it to our list of sites to access through vpn, so I've been wondering if I did something wrong. No idea if a ban like that is possible though, so I'm sorry if I sound extremely stupid.

No. 2427

>>2426
Huh. Disregard my post. It seems that the problem is that http redirects to https and somehow lolcow with https only works through vpn for me. Weird.

No. 2428

Guys, your ip is blocked in Russia since 25.04.2016. And https doesn't work because they can't switch the page with "blahblahblah this site is blocked"
The best thing is THEY BLOCKED CLOUDFLARE lol

No. 2432

>>2428
I've received reports of this from another Russian anon as well. I doubt the Russian government was targeting this site in particular, since each of Cloudflare's reverse proxy IPs serve a large number of websites.

Not really anything I can do about it.

No. 2436

>>2432
You can ask cloudflare to move you to a different ip, but, honestly, getting blocked in Russia is kind of a good thing, because now you'll only have russian anons who can use vpn, which probably means less idiots!

No. 2437

>>2294
okay, sure. test 1

No. 2438

>>2437
test 2

No. 2439

>>2437
>>2438
alright, guess this answers my question in >>2293. maybe this could be added to the info page of the site?

No. 2441


No. 2442

>>2293
I see no reason why you can't do that as anonymous

No. 2450

>>2442
it's a lot easier to convince people to send you personal information (screencaps) if you have some sort of unified identity established

>>2441
fair enough.

No. 2470

Can you set the first few words in the comment field as the page title when a thread doesn't have a title?

No. 2530

The hell happened to the time stamps. I don't know if it is just me or not, but now rather than showing the minutes/hours/days since posting it is only time stamped with the exact date.

I don't like this.

No. 2532

>>2530
Just click on the date dumbass

No. 2544

I haven't been to chat.lolcow.farm in ages. Getting 403 forbbiden when I try. Is it dead?

No. 2712

I'm having issues with the website lately.
- can't enlarge pictures in threads, instead they open in new tabs
- it no longer says how recent a thread was updated, it instead just says the date
- it also doesn't highlight which comment is being replied to/have a preview box
- can't delete comments
- can't skip to the top/bottom of threads

anyone else having issues with this?

No. 2718

>>2712
make sure you're not in lite mode

No. 2720

>2718
I thought about that but there's nothing anywhere saying exit lite mode and I don't even see an option to go into lite mode. think this site has been abandoned

No. 3155

onii-chan the fuck is going on with lolcow? I'm on mobile and whenever I try to expand the raven sparks thread it takes me to the Margo one.

No. 3156

>>3155
wtf is going on with lolcow yesterday/today? Yesterday I kept getting cloudflare errors, and now a bunch of posts have just vanished. They weren't off topic posts either, just completely random.

No. 3164

There seems to be a problem with inserting YT videos into posts, the [DL] option doesn't come up anymore.

Can this be fixed, because we don't want to be giving certain lolcows revenue for views.

No. 3179

Dear new admin:

I hope you don't forget that our dear Queen's birthday is tomorrow. I hope something special is planned for /pt/ at least. Thank you <3

No. 3331

File: 1474616186907.png (19.33 KB, 415x144, Screen Shot 2016-09-23 at 12.2…)

>>2
this keeps popping up but only in one thread and I can't figure out why, switching browsers didn't fix anything. tried replying in a different /pt/ topic and it worked immediately so i don't think it's a full site issue?

No. 3332

hey, the board's being attacked again. two posts in pt reported this minute, one foul image. it's very 'sperg chan'

No. 3537

File: 1478793113697.png (696.22 KB, 1343x502, screen.png)

Love the new Kiki-esque board style, but just one gripe I have with it is that the post/comment boxes go over the top of the quick reply box making it difficult to use.
Took a screenshot to show what I mean.

No. 3538

>>3537
post hovers are doing it too

No. 3539

>>3537
>>3538
Came here to say the same. I get it but it's a pain in the ass to read right now.

No. 3542

>>3537
>>3538
>>3539
Fixed, but it may take some time for your browser's cache to refresh.

No. 3543

Sage doesn't appear to be working. I've used it twice in a thread in /snow/ and both times it's bumped the thread

No. 3547

>>3543
Check it carefully. You aren't entering just "sage".

No. 3548

>>3547
Ah pesky hidden space. My apologies

No. 3567

File: 1479671174630.jpg (12.67 KB, 958x559, 15078797_10207868856506127_280…)

A friend of mine cannot visit the site, she gets the error displayed in pic related.Do you know any fixes?

No. 3568

>>3567
Her browser version probably isn't compatible with Cloudflare.

https://support.cloudflare.com/hc/en-us/articles/203041594-What-browsers-work-with-CloudFlare-s-SSL-certificates-

Does upgrading Chrome help? Also, try Firefox and other browsers.

No. 3576

Just a suggestion but update the rules page. Even if you don't plan to change anything it's a good idea to show that the rules have been reviewed since April 27, 2016 and the Admin position has changed hands.

No. 3642

anonylink doesn't work anymore. it hasn't been archiving links for a good minute. what happened to it?

No. 3643

>>3642
Is it working okay now?

No. 3680

so is this like the new infinichan or something?

No. 3694

>>3680
we don't allow cp or swat people here

No. 3715

>>3694

Not sure if I should ask this in this thread, but this is a suggestion so anyway:

can we get new banners, new Admin-sama? I see we have some new ones here >>962 and I'd like to make a few myself.

No. 3740

>>3715
Added.

No. 3795

Any chance we can get a link to the catalogue from the threads directly?

No. 3818

>>3795
Added.

No. 3849

is aminyan discussion still banned? I never participated before but I came across her soft core porn and I think it might be worth discussion?

No. 4026


No. 4040

Whenever I try to upload a Webm I get "Undefined index: width" as a dialog response, was Webm support removed?

No. 4041

>>4040
Fixed. Please try now.

No. 4130

>>4041
Do threads auto update or how does that work sorry Daddy I'm new(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 4139

how about being able to edit posts for like 5-10 minutes after posting them?
i mean i also could just fucking proof-read… but still

No. 4140

File: 1491968233112.png (5.83 KB, 64x74, Screen Shot 2017-04-12 at 00.5…)

Can we have some sort of notification like this? but only if you comment in one thread in that board

No. 4141

On mobile, occasionally threads will just disappear for me. I haven't been accidentally hiding them or anything, they just don't show up and then reappear whenever they feel like it. Is that a problem with my shitty phone or a site glitch?

I've only been experiencing this for the past week or so and I use both the google app browser and chrome. Is it the Mercury Retrograde?

No. 4142

>>2
~#wordsミ★ => words
how is this suppossed to work?
because somehow "# ~" just becomes this shooting star. what am i doing wrong?
~#testミ★

No. 4144

>>4141
When this happens, are you still able to find the thread in the catalog?

No. 4148

>>4142
Sorry, please try now.

No. 4151


No. 4152

>>4148
yay, thanks!

No. 4161

when i viewed threads on my phone It used to have arrow icons to take you straight 'back to top' and 'to bottom' of thread so you didnt have to scroll for ages manually through all the old posts to get to most recent but last few days that feature seems to have disappeared- is it something i am doing wrong or is it something that has changed on lolcow?

No. 4162

>>4161
They should still be there. Have you tried zooming out your screen fully to see if there's anything on the sides?

No. 4164

Hi, I can't watch linked videos on here. When I click on the video (I'm on mobile) it completely disappears. Any fixes?

No. 4165

>>4164

I'm having this same problem on mobile and it only started happening over the past few days. Before that I could watch videos in threads fine via mobile.

No. 4166

>>4164
>>4165
Sorry about that. Should be fixed now (or whenever your cache refreshes).

No. 4167

Thank you for adding the "hide chat" function, but there still seems to be an issue while browsing /pt. On ios my phone completely freezes, and my phone is updated etc. no issue browsing the other boards, or other sites. Could you look into it?

No. 4214

I'd really love if you could steal some things from catalog.neet.tv for the catalog, primarily the pinning (with unread replies reporting) and hiding of threads.
Also, the rules page doesn't have the complete boards listing, and /ot/ is /b/.
I'd also think it might be nice to link the info page next to the rules, and would like to see it updated with a nice gif (like the one for reporting) for saging, as well as a statement suggesting it be used for offtopic/blogposty posts. New users seem to really struggle with it, I'm probably being optimistic but maybe that would help.

No. 4295

File: 1496856374745.png (293.76 KB, 463x216, 8598786501.png)

Site's glitching a bit, some of the threads have the [-] gone and the ones that did have now disappeared from the page (Onion's should be between Maggot and Shingles in the cap).

No. 4401

File: 1498870740881.png (4.18 KB, 386x145, fJA8yFL.png)

New feature: Hide all saged posts in this thread. The on/off toggle is between the comment field and the announcements (pic related). The gap between posts increases with the amount of saged comments. Hope this improves user experience!

No. 4436

Not a bug or anything, but just a suggestion…

Have you all ever considered the idea of multiple images being uploaded for each post? Nothing like 5+ images or anything, but maybe a max of 3 (or even 2) would help a lot of our threads. Especially /pt/ and /snow/.

Just wondering, because I come across several threads where an anon is needing to post screencaps or images of a milky moment and they have to span several images out across multiple posts. Sometimes they'll be back-to-back all at once, but most of the time they're scattered in the thread with a few other posts in between. It would help the threads be a bit less cluttered as well as freeing up some extra posts before the limit is hit.

That's if it can be done. I've seen several imageboards have the feature but didn't know if it was something that would be too difficult to incorporate here due to how it's set up (as not all are the same).

No. 4498

/ot/ is attempting to load as a Dropbox file when I use the link

No. 4501

>>4498
what do you mean? it's loading ok for me

No. 4508

>>4501
On mobile it would open up a Dropbox file instead of the page. The file was empty.

No. 4509

>>4508
you got yourself one of these viruses that do that to random links. run an antivirus.

No. 4520

>>2
I'm getting a lot of server errors and the site's loading very slowly when it does actually load. Only been happening while browsing today

No. 4521

>>4520
Same, the site is really damn slow since yesterday.
And now images open in full window size, really annoying

No. 4522

>>4520
>>4521
Different anon, same issue. Horribly slow. Admin? Farmhands?

No. 4523

>>4520
same here

No. 4524

>>4520
Same here. Site running very slow or won't even load at all, instead showing an error page. Also not loading images most of the time, just getting stuck loading.

No. 4525

File: 1501480538851.png (80.05 KB, 1366x739, lolcow error 502.png)

>>4524
Here's a photo of the error page, idk if that would be helpful to farmhands/admin.

No. 4526

>>4525

This announcement happened twice and Lolcow's still running slow, is it still an internal server error?

No. 4527

This seems to be a problem with the host servers and not lolcow itself, thank you for being patient.

No. 4528

The connection issues should now be resolved. Please reply to this if you're still experiencing issues.

No. 4544

>>4525
I had the same error page this morning.

No. 4545

File: 1502383185681.jpg (29.88 KB, 504x458, b49b8927c4803844d7a63ca7207c5f…)

I think we should have an IP marker, similar to what /b/ use to have in 2010, something where people can't samefag, like a code for each IP

No. 4560

>>4545
IDs have always been talked about and it's been known that the majority of people don't want that shit here. People who want to be ID'd can go to pull and sit in a hugbox over there.

No. 4574

File: 1503741983434.png (256.12 KB, 750x1334, IMG_1674.PNG)

Why does mobile browsing do this every few days?

No. 4631

Hey, would it be possible to disable the opening of youtube videos when choosing to expand every image on a page?

No. 4650

>>4631
fixed!

No. 4651

Hi new Admin! I was trying to view all of Kiki's posts using this link:

lolcow.farm/all-posts-kiki.html

Which is the link that is on lolcow.farm/kiki for viewing her posts. However, it just takes me to the lolcow homepage. Is there something wrong? Thanks!

No. 4660

This might be a stupid suggestion, but I find this site really fucking hard to navigate. Its taken me ages of looking around to figure out how to move from thread to thread. Could there be a basic 'lolcow.farm for dummies' page, similar to the rules page so that newbies can figure out how to use the site?

No. 4662

Could we have some more boards? I wouldn't mind one for makeup for example. It's perfect for an image board composed mostly by girls.
And then it's easier to divide threads by eye makeup, ugly makeup, foundation colors etc instead of making many on /g/

No. 4693

>>4651
idk if theyve changed anything but any links on /kiki work just fine for me

No. 4717

I don't know about other Android users but my phone only loads 3 posts from the bottom and omits the last two. I know the site is already facing issues with our provider but I wanted to let someone know

No. 4724

hjoiji

No. 4727

testttt

No. 4728

A thread watcher. Please. I follow a lot of threads so not having them always open or having to check on them would make it so much more convenient and effective.

No. 4758

With a lot of threads now featuring transcripts of video that can be very long, especially in ravens thread can we maybe put them under a cut. Like how on OPs we have that post to "long to show click for full text" option

No. 4773

wtf i didn't know you could spoiler like this, this is so much more convenient

No. 4777

test

No. 4781

Is there any chance to implement some features from tempcow over here? It's all minor stuff but it comes in handy, like hovering over a thumbnail to expand the picture or how when you mark a part of a post and click on the post number it quotes that part automatically.
Pls no #8ball though

No. 4841

File: 1513494314409.png (42.22 KB, 800x200, lolcowMock.png)

Apologies if this has been posted already; did a quick ctrl+f and didn't see it pop up. I was curious how difficult it would be to implement a message reaction system for threads. I attached a mockup of what it could possibly look like (The emoji images are placeholders for icons that are made specifically for this forum). The two main issues it would help accomplish imo:

1) A user posts an awesome shoop/cow fanart, and the thread is populated with a couple "you slay me, anon". But being able to lurk and quietly emote at messages would provide encouragement for more posts like this and prevent the thread from mostly being the same reactions - and give lurkers an opportunity to help shape the thread by offering encouragement.

2) The opposite is true. While some posts are given more encouragement for them to continue sharing in that vein, people who go on long nitpicking spergouts or brag about torturing their friends for 10 years with talking about, the thread gets clogged with several put-downs or mini-modding. Or another situation where the response is too autistic to warrant any replies to the message, which the user might interpret as a good response since there was no opposition. Instead, users would be able to react without having to add posts to the thread that let users know to lurk more or pay attention to the messages with higher votes.

3) As previously mentioned - especially with the Onion threads - there has been a large surge of mini-modding. With responses just being "sage your post" or "nitpicking", users could express their thoughts on a post by reacting with "sage" or "nitpicking" emotes. It wouldn't be an official moderator message, but it would give the commentor the hint of how they come across without filling the thread with useless posts.

TL;DR adding reactions would cut down on the number of non-contributive posts, encourage lurkers to shape the conversation without having to comment, and cut-down on mini-modding. I imagine this is probably not an easy feature to implement, but I hope that the pros I've listed here at least make it considered for development.

No. 4867

>>4841
Yeah, something like KiwiFarms has would be fun. We could have our own emoticons related to cows. If this idea is chose it would be great to have a thread to brainstorm what little icons to use, maybe put some Queen PT faces too.

What I did like from tempcow was the always sage feature. It gave me peace of mind. It would be great to have it here.

No. 4869

>>4841
I love this idea! Admin pls

No. 4871

No lolcow awards this year?

Awww disappoint.

Happy holidays, everyone!

No. 4899

testing because I saw others doing it

No. 5057

File: 1517584070752.png (582.46 KB, 1440x2560, Screenshot_20180202-090223.png)

Not sure if this is just my phone acting up or not, but the catalogue keeps redirecting (to a new catalogue page that isnt loading the format properly). and when I read some threads a post will initially load, then just become a weird gap/space and fuck up the thread layout. Pic related, the white gaps are where posts should be.

Everything was fine til today. I have not updated my phone or apps and experienced no issues with other image board sites I frequent.

I'm using Samsung Browser 5 on Android.

No. 5058

>>5057
Can you please screenshot the catalog you're seeing, with the URL also included in the screenshots?

As for the missing posts: Can you see if you selected "Hide saged posts for this thread" in the top right of the thread pages? If you selected it, it will say "Show saged posts for this thread", which you can click to see them again.

No. 5097

Why do the .gifs I post say .jpg at the top of my posts? It seems like they play properly when clicked on (I'm on a tablet so idk if it's different on other devices).

No. 5100


No. 5285

Did the admins add a robot.txt recently? I used to monitor threads using change detection but I got a bunch of messages today saying it had been blocked.

Is there any other way to monitor threads by email or notifications? Or maybe add a pinned thread watcher like 4chan?

Thanks.

No. 5458

Can site themes from temp be put on main? The mawaru one was nice.

No. 5592

How do I use dis.

No. 5593

Idk

No. 5648

I remember the first admin had a lolcow Twitter account to announce what was wrong when the site would go down. Could we come up with any idea like that now that temp is gone? (I like that temp is gone, it was trash but it's original idea was solid in times like that.)

No. 5657

>>2
Is this how you reply to someone? I'm new

No. 5658

>>5657
yeah

No. 5659

NOTICE

Thread has reached 1100 posts. The thread will be locked and you will be unable to post in it shortly after it exceeds 1200 posts. Please begin preparing a new thread and post a link to it when it's created.

No. 5787

I can no longer access this site when using mobile data.

I always get 'connection lost' or something in regards to me having no internet connection.
It's fine when I use Wi-Fi but n it mobile data. The site doesn't seem to be blocked by my mobile provider as I could access it on data up until a few months ago and if it were blocked by them I'd be told that.

Every other site of this type works fine it's just lolcow that doesn't.

Anyone know why? How can I fix this?

No. 5796

Suggestion for a "submit report" and/or "are you sure you want to delete your post?" prompts to help with preventing accidental reports & deleting. Probably annoying at the beginning, but best to prevent missclicks rather than having to go through captcha

No. 5816

>>5796
there's already an accident prevention measure in place for both things, the little tick box.

No. 6052

>>373
>>375
I keep thinking this, and it looks like the last time it was mentioned was 3 years ago, and there are even more youtube cow threads now! I mean Onion/Lainey, Game Grumps/Suzy, Dasha/Edwin/Cyr/Mina, Kelly Eden, Baylee Jae, grav3yardgirl, Mags/Venus, Logan Paul, Pewdiepie just to name a few. I know some of them would stay on /pt/ but a separate youtube board might be nice. Just think of all the beautubers alone! The fact that we needed a whole separate youtube embedding system alone seems like enough indication.

Maybe something like /yt/ or /guru/ ? I know Gurugossiper exists but trying to read a forum where everyone has signatures and avatars and stacks of quotes in the year 2018 seems wild.



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