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File: 1430242410489.jpg (195.16 KB, 640x1002, 1429970175315.jpg)

No. 89979

Ashley thread #8.

Tumblr: http://shred-my-anxiety.tumblr.com/
public & anon-enabled
Instagram: http://instagram.com/ghost.in.my.pocket
Twitter: https://twitter.com/goodbye_atticus

Current Events:
Erika stabilizes and writes a love letter to /pt/
Ashley is decorating stupid iPhone cases and plans to do a series of Q&As on Youtube.

Will we find out who made the spooky phone-call? Will Ashley's business take off? Probably not, but we'll watch this bullshit either way.

Previous thread #7 >>81899
thread #6: >>76718
thread #5: >>66250
thread #4: >>40939
thread #3: >>34685
thread #2: >>32362
thread #1: >>21279

No. 89985

File: 1430242846056.png (121.5 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-28-13-36-42…)

Part one.

No. 89986

File: 1430242974568.png (125.12 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-28-13-37-09…)

Second half.

No. 89990

File: 1430243422513.png (397.5 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-28-13-45-46…)

No. 89992

File: 1430243647393.jpg (6.29 KB, 159x178, 1411194951704.jpg)

>I was only 9 years old
>I loved Ash so much, I had all her penpal letters and care packages
>I binge and purge to Ash every night before bed, thanking her for all those triggering messages on her tumblr
>"Ash is love" I say. "Ash is death"
>My mom hears me and calls an ambulance
>I knew she was just jealous of my devotion for Ash
>I called her a fat cunt
>She slaps me and sends me to recovery
>I'm crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and its really cold
>A figure is limping towards me
>I feel something touch me
>Its Ash
>I am so happy
>she whispers in to my ear, "I can't wait to see you stuffed with fat"
>She grabs me with her weak, skeleton hands and puts me on my hands and knees
>I'm ready
>I spread my ass cheeks for Ash
>She penetrates my butthole with her boner
>It hurts so much but I do it for Ash
>I can feel the krispy kreme rise up my throat as my eyes start to water
>I puke against her force
>I want to please Ash
>She rasps a mighty croak as she fills my butt with her love
>My mom walks in
>Ash looks her straight in the eye and says. "It's all over now"
>Ash flies through the window
>Ash is love, Ash is death

No. 89995

>I loved Ash so much, I had all her penpal letters and care packages
>I binge and purge to Ash every night before bed, thanking her for all those triggering messages on her tumblr

Oh, wow.

No. 89997

File: 1430243911659.jpg (45.72 KB, 396x495, Untitled.jpg)

What's this?

No. 90000

Oh wait, this is that fanfic person?

No. 90001

I think it's a fanfiction about TheForestCat.

No. 90002


No. 90003

>>She penetrates my butthole with her boner

Think that should be "bony hand and fingers"

No. 90004


No. 90006

is she only selling her crap on Instagram? that's not dodgy at all. doesn't look like she's getting much interest in her work on tumblr.

No. 90007

Was anybody added by Ashley on IG? If so, screenshots of her insta? Anything new happening?

No. 90008

>>she lubricates the injured hedgehog

No. 90010

>she lubricates the injured hedgehog


No. 90011

explains the head injury

No. 90012

File: 1430244530276.png (99.71 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-28-14-07-31…)

This was JUST posted by Ash on her tumblr.

No. 90013

Hey, Ash. How about mixing your new intro vido with clips from your old ones and doing a bit of a catch up since 2007?

Nopes. Anons usually come up something new, but pretty sure we've not seen all 16 or 17 of her posts. When they're all selfies in her car or at target, they kinda blend into one.

No. 90014

File: 1430244721235.png (200.73 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-28-13-53-58…)

Macaroni and cheese appears again.

No. 90015

UK anon is an idiot. There are tons of people in this thread with EDs because people with EDs are fascinated with Ashley. It's not just one person talking about this stuff. Also, you have the NHS which lets people practically live in hospitals. ED treatment isnt some rarity there. Fuck.

And no, I'm not interested in a phone case from Ashley. It would be too depressing to look at knowing who they came from. I don't like her but damn she's basically torturing herself.

No. 90016

Oh for FUCK'S SAKE. Jesus F Christ. What NOW?

1. People don't practically live in hospitals. You're lucky if you can get a bed. People about to croak it are left in corridors because there are no beds.

I'm not even going to go any further. If I need to know what I'm talking about before I comment, then so does everyone else, so stfu. You know nothing about our system. Shush now, dear.

No. 90017

I agree, UK anon was out of line but let's ignore it. All too often these threads are derailed by arguments like these.

To be honest, the whole sparkles, glitter, stickers on a jelly case sounds horrible. The durability would be awful. I wish she'd just get treatment instead of floundering in the throes of death.

No. 90021

File: 1430245572643.png (39.75 KB, 469x260, Screenshot_2015-04-28-14-22-07…)

I hope she posts here someday.

Also, she's getting sassy, haha.

No. 90023


No. 90025

This was fantastic. Thank you.

No. 90026

I'm pretty sure Ash has her own room. (Old youtube)

That apartment's in the others as well, with the bunny and her friend and it doesn't look like a hovel.

No. 90030

Don't live there anymore sry

No. 90034

Ash? idk the way you worded it…

No. 90037

Haven't you got some commissions to be getting on with? Glitter and stickers, etc.

No. 90044

File: 1430246615208.png (27.9 KB, 590x495, ganbatte.png)


Just on the off chance Erika ever reads this.

Erika you're probably making the best decision of your life.
Recovery is a difficult thing, as a recovered anorexic this is something you and I will be able to understand more than most people.
I am always seeing people complimenting you on your looks and it's true, you've been graced with beauty, but beyond that you're clearly an articulate, intelligent woman and within that lies power, but in order to enact that power you need the strength to maintain that, strength both mentally and physically and this is something that a lack of nutrition is quite adept in sapping.

Beyond anything you're first a woman who presently suffers with disordered habits, not a disordered woman. Please never allow what ails you to define you when you possess so much more than that.
You have potential to forge an amazing life from here and that's something to be sought and cherished, but as with everything, wisdom is derived from experience. You cannot experience anything in its complete potential when you're not living, only existing.

When you give in to these compulsions that dog you throughout every second it's weakness, to stand up and say no is what's really powerful.

Stand up, be strong, kick and scream and tear your way towards life. We're all behind you.

No. 90046

Why not just tell her that on Instagram?

No. 90048

That was beautiful Anon. Erika is a shining ray of hope in an otherwise depressing and aggravating thread.

You could have this support too Ash, you've burned your bridge completely with some anons but…

I agree. If you have insta, DM her this. She's very sweet and open. I've talked to her myself.

No. 90049


Can you DM on IG without a phone? I broke my phone and am waiting on a new one.

Oh well I just left it in the comments. I hope she doesn't think it intrusive.



No. 90050

Would she be allowed to receive mail while an in patient? Pretty sure some letters would make things slightly easier if people want to send her messages.

No. 90054

I have no idea. Online IG confuses me. She'll read it and I doubt she'll think it intrusive, she seems genuinely thankful about our support. Plus I think the part >you're first a woman who presently suffers with disordered habits, not a disordered woman. is very touching and something I think she should hear.

She's allowed her phone. I think if we want to send any messages of support we should DM her on Instagram. She seems to be using hers as a diary and to keep in touch with people. But yes, anyone who is put inpatient is allowed to receive mail.

No. 90055

Oops. Before anyone thinks this is way stalkery, I meant mailed TO the place and obviously not her private home address.

No. 90060

I can't DM from online IG, only like and comment on posted pics. If there's a way to DM, I've never found it. Comment on the pics though. Of course she'd welcome kind words.

No. 90063

Sounds like ass kissing to me, but I guess Erika's ass is the most kissable.

No. 90064


I get that this is "the" bitch forum, and trust me I am one of the biggest bitches here and am probably responsible for like a 4th of the dramu on this site, but that doesn't mean we're not allowed to be supportive.

Erika seems like a decent person with a problem a lot of us can relate to and sympathise with. We want to see her get better so that she doesn't turn into some twisted, bitter gargoyle creature like Ash.

No. 90068

I don't think she ever could turn into an ashgoyle.

No. 90070

Ugh, I know. It's kind of cool how there is kind of a good/evil parallel going on between Erika and Ash. Their reactions to people and situations are basically exactly opposite.

She couldn't. Erika cares too much about other people while Ash… Ash maybe only cares about her rabbit at the very most.

No. 90073

No. Ashley doesn't care about her rabbit, she owns her rabbit.

No. 90074

Eh, you're right. I was being an optimistic faggot.

No. 90076


I don't like the way she shrieks at the rabbit and cat in those youtubes. I bet they're relieved her throat's fucked from barfing.

No. 90078

Erika, I am beyond proud of you for wanting this change, your baby girls need their mom happy and above all healthy. Please, hang in there you have a long hard road but you can get through this!

No. 90079


She admitted she reads these threads so I'm sure she'll see these post. Erika, always feel free to post here. You can enter a name in the top field. Plus you have a very unique writing style that would be hard to copy. ;P

No. 90080

This positivity made me happy.

No. 90083

I love this woman omg

No. 90084

Oh, Erika… You're not and never were disgusting, just sick and that's ok. You didn't choose this for yourself even if you think you're partly responsible, you're not. You're a fantastic person IMO. Look at how many posters in this specific thread are happy for you.


We dig ya' too.

To keep on topic, I'm very interested in seeing what Ash is actually going to make with this crafting bullshit. Just stickers and glitter on phone cases?? What does she think this is going to do for her? If she wants a hobby or to do something creative go do arts and crafts at an ED center.

No. 90085

Yes, Erika. You're a wonderful person. Divorce Yustas. Block Ashley and her creepy ass friend Joltography. Get rid of all the negative people in your life. Everyone here thinks you're awesome.

No. 90089

Joltography/TheForestCat disturbs the hell out of me. Didn't we find evidence she's a wannabe-anorexic? A Proana profile or something?

No. 90091

No, that was some kid with the same first name.

No. 90093

Ah, thank-you for the info. Still creepy how she's all over E and A.

No. 90094

She's either autistic as fuck, conniving as fuck, or gay as fuck. I haven't decided which one, but something is up with her.

No. 90095


She's not proana as far as I can tell, just pathetic.

No. 90096

File: 1430251738033.jpg (98.32 KB, 470x626, IMG_20150428_160726.jpg)

Autism for sure.

No. 90098

I love how Erika basically just ignores her comment about us, haha.

No. 90099

Erika's awesome, she knows what a piece of trashley this girl is.

No. 90101

Is Erika having an affair with "Joseph"?

No. 90102

> trashley

No. 90104

No? It doesn't look like it at all to me. He just said some supportive words and I doubt she'd wait until she's shipped off to a recovery center in Denver to start one. You're looking too deeply, Anon. ;)

It would be interesting, but nah.

No. 90107

When Erika manages to get through this she's going to make an amazing role model for people suffering with disordered eating one day.

No. 90108

When Ashley dies, she'll make a good poster child too.

No. 90110

Joltography is seeking out relationships with damaged people. It's bizarre. Does she have an ED? Why is she looking for these people? And since we know she's not 15, I don't feel bad about talking about her anymore. Thanks for confirming, Joltography!

No. 90112

Maybe she's recovered? Maybe she just doesn't know how to talk to normal people?

No. 90114

I doubt it. If she was ~recovered~ she'd mention it every-time she posted. She's that kind of person.

No. 90115

Everyone is weird and there are plenty of people with EDs on social media. I just think it's strange that she chooses to ask out two of the sickest ones who dislike each other.

No. 90116

Well idk then, ask her?

No. 90117

She asked them out? Gross, maybe she just has a fetish.

No. 90118

A friend of my enemies is no friend of mine. I think Erika is too polite to tell J to fuck off.

No. 90119

People on the spectrum can get some pretty odd obsessions…

No. 90121

That was supposed to be "seek out"

No. 90122

Yeah, but most people on the spectrum are obsessed with harmless things like Sonic the Hedgehog and trains.

Oh thank god.

No. 90124


Ugh, I'm picturing the autistic people I know obsessing over anorexics on tumblr. Rain Man could have been a more interesting movie if it were made today lol

No. 90127

I can't wait to see what magic Ash creates with that ~professional glitter glue~ of hers.

No. 90128

Sonichu Man.

No. 90130

Maybe it' the morbid 'can't look away from a car crash' thing… Let's be honest, a lot of the Ashley/Erika shit is enthralling. I mean, this is our 8th fucking thread, hahah. They're both interesting but I think Jolt/ForestCat is trying to insert herself in the drama and stir things up, hence her bringing us up, ect.

Sorry, wasn't trying to be dismissive, Anon. D: I'd ask her if I could stand the thought of talking to her but alas, I cannot.

Haha,I agree. Anorexia would be a very odd obsession. She'd probably have pictures of women with it on her IG if she had a fixation though.

I lol'd at 'professional glitter glue' so hard. Ash, just get help. This crafting thing is going to be a disaster.

No. 90135

>>professional glitter glue

Yes, she will ~apply~ it ~professionally~

No. 90136

Isn't E's daughter autistic? Maybe she's scared to tell her to fuck off in case the kid grows up to be like her.

No. 90139

The phone cases. When people here were encouraging her to do something other than binge, a couple of anons said it'd be nice if she sent the things she made in giveaways instead of food. I thought that's what she'd be doing. Selling them - whut? - uh. That's not going to work.

Out of curiosity I googled what others do to customize their iphone cases, and WELL it's more than glitter and MLP stickers. Really fancy, crafty things you'd pay for. Sorry, Ash. Shoulda opted for making bracelets.

No. 90140

Ah, come on. Let's be nice, Erika reads this threads. No need to bring the kids into it but yes, one of her daughters' is autistic. I think Erika is just 'too nice' in general to cause a fuss over someones' passive aggressive comment. Jolt/ForestCat obviously wanted to 'remind' Erika that we can be dicks as seen here >>90096

No. 90142

My thoughts exactly. I suppose the supplies might be more expensive with bracelets though, idk.

No. 90143

Erika's post made me tear up a bit. She is so wonderful and is slowly realizing it. She will be a great mother when she can be with her kids full time again

No. 90144

yo I'm working at Disney this summer and if I see Ash omg

No. 90146

>I'm also kind of weird, and probably not in a good way.

No. Not in a good way. Not even in a kool edgy way.

A try hard maybe who seeks out "freaks" as friends?

No. 90148

So when is ashley going to come back here and say that erika should be kissing her ass for all of the suppost erika has gotten from us?

No. 90149

Don't give her a free muffin or she'll think you're hitting on her.

No. 90150

File: 1430255114194.jpg (47 KB, 464x625, IMG_20150428_170414.jpg)

No. 90151

what even is professional glitter glue

No. 90152

That's got to be a weird feeling.

No. 90153

I know, as opposed to what? Amateur glitter glue?

I can't begin to imagine…

No. 90154

I'm working in retail, be able to see all the money she spends

No. 90156

Oh, I'm sure it will happen within the next few days. It's just a matter of time.

No. 90157

Come onnnn! She's selling her quality merchandise. Saying "professional" is better than the reality "the cheapest shit in the store".

No. 90158

Maybe is like a glue that comes with glitter inside it? I keep imaging those glitter glue pens

No. 90159

File: 1430255509094.jpg (13.63 KB, 225x225, download.jpg)


No. 90161

That's what we're imagining too but 'professional glitter glue' is kind of a ironic statement. Those things suck and would fall off a gel case in like, a day.



No. 90162


No. 90163

File: 1430255620505.gif (40.71 KB, 300x100, lolcow.gif)

Whoops, wrong file.

No. 90164


The quality of new banners lately is amazing.

No. 90165

File: 1430255676231.jpg (25.03 KB, 714x380, PROFESH.JPG)

Would it melt the plastic or peel off?

Image: professional glitterglue - 88 cents

No. 90166

Admin-senpai, come look at what PT made you!!!

I assume it would peel off rather quickly.

No. 90168

Just because she reads the threads now doesn't mean we can't speculate like before. She might be a ~recovering angel~, but this is still lolcow.

No. 90169

i don't know why but i can't stop laughing at this

No. 90170

It would fall off in chunks like a disgusting scab.

No. 90171


Maybe I'm in the minority but I've always been vastly disapproving of bring small children into our drama.

Don't pick on her kid ffs, she has nothing to do with any of this.

No. 90172

I knoooooow. I just have this weird feeling. I think I 'feel bad'? idk weird.

No. 90173

Double posting to agree with you.

No. 90193

File: 1430259129914.png (769.36 KB, 925x553, bffjackie.png)

Anyone else notice Jackie commenting on everything Ash posts lately? What's up with her?

No. 90198

She's mental in a creepy way. Not to sound nasty, but she comes across as a bit retarded.

Why do wanarexics always lie flat to show off ribs and hips? Of course they stick out when you're lying down. She's breathing in and lifting herself up too for maximum effect.

No. 90203


Yeah, she's different and I don't think she can help it.


I think the reason why she likes Disney is because they get a TON of Make-A-Wish kids and critically ill people and they're trained to dealing with them in a way that is respectful and kind. They will go out of their way to treat her well there. They probably assume she's a terminal cancer patient.

No. 90207

Probably a mild learning disability.

No. 90213

Oh my god the way we see her face in the shot with the triple chin
My fucking sides have reached orbit

No. 90215

erika if you read this, i am sending you positive thoughts. i had no idea who you were, i just came her to lol about ash, and then i learned about you. i really think you can make it to the other side and then do great things for others, or even just keep being great for yourself and you girls.

No. 90216

her pjs look very ageplay.

No. 90217

for real. winnie the pooh and spongebob???

No. 90219

it's almost not even the characters but just the overall design. the colors, the other little flowers and hearts and stuff, etc. i mean i have hello kitty pjs but they look like they're made for an adult. it looks like you could take the fabric from those and make some onesies.

i know, off-topic, but i felt like mentioning it.

No. 90224

File: 1430262969261.jpg (134.4 KB, 640x960, image.jpg)

Meanwhile this cunt is at KK getting her hourly binge foods in.

No. 90226


I want to know what the salesperson was thinking when she asked for a dozen doughnuts. Damn.

No. 90234

As any normal person who encountered her would react….immediately end all communication and pray she doesn't steal your soul

No. 90236

File: 1430264687361.jpg (157.28 KB, 640x960, image.jpg)

Ash pretending her blue hair was natural and not a wig

No. 90238

Now she's almost as yellow as her emojis.

No. 90239

It's a filter, dumbass

No. 90240

Just as she pretends that brown rat on her head isn't a wig.

No. 90241

they made special arrangements with make-a-wish kids or if you're very ill and choose to visit disney. They have a staff assisting you incase something goes wrong and to make everything run smoothly like make sure there isn't a 70 min wait for your favorite princess

No. 90243

Well how the fuck would I know that, bitchface?

No. 90245

That's no filter. That's jaundice. Liver damage. Impending death.

No. 90249

Regardless if it's self induced by a filter or due to natural causes, the statement still stands you sperg.

And yes, her organs are failing so it's definitely jaundice.

No. 90252


No. 90254

Ash and all her ED followers are into little kid stuff.

No. 90255

You and me both.

No. 90260

File: 1430268003230.jpg (39.56 KB, 634x304, emojiiis.jpg)

No. 90261

>>90260 There's no in-between from yellow to white wtf

No. 90263

They're late-stage liver failure emoticons.

No. 90264

Black emojis? Oh no, Ashley will be quaking with fear.

She uploaded a new video to tumblr btw. Some jerk bought her dvds.

No. 90266

WTF how even??????

No. 90267

They… They literally made one of the emoticon skin tones yellow? What's next, a red one?

No. 90272

File: 1430269782881.jpg (46.97 KB, 509x297, superhero.JPG)

back to the donuts. i wondered what Superhero day was and found the fb page. you have to take your superhero along? so that means…ASHLEY…is her mother's superhero??? correct me if I've got this wrong, but it looks as if you needed to nominate someone for being ~special~


No. 90274

You had to buy a dozen for a free dozen. TWENTY FOUR DONUTS!!! that's some binge.

No. 90275

Holy fuck she got 24 donuts.

No. 90280

This could finish her off.

No. 90281

I wonder if her mom got any. The rest have already been flushed, I'm sure.

No. 90284

Her toilet got 24 doughnuts :-/. Jeez, which one of her enablers drive her to Krispy Kreme?

No. 90287


Ma Isaacs took her.

No. 90292

I have a lot less sympathy for her mom then. And I'm sure that this is neither the first nor the last time. Does she want her daughter to die? Does she pretend not to hear the toilet flushing all the time? I guess ash has a table and chair in the bathroom so she must be used to it.

No. 90294

Those fangs!

No. 90297

And you faggots bashed me in the previous thread saying thats not lanugo all over her face? that aint normal

No. 90299

She literally said in an earlier post that she found her blue wig, so why the fuck is she now pretending like she dyed her real hair?

No. 90300

Indeed. You don't buy your bulimic daughter 12 donuts so she can get another 12 free.

Yeah, fuzzy face.

No. 90301

idk. i thought everyone would know that IF it was dyed hair, she'd have to bleach it first for fantasy color dyes.

No. 90303

Her followers are idiots.

No. 90307


IIRC not long ago she was bitching on one of her social media platforms about how they made emojis with new skin colors, but none of the new colors are a paler white than the white one..

No. 90308

No one said who the donuts were for- so eh. No proof. And 'oh it's obvious' ain't legit enough for evidence sry

No. 90310


No. 90311

Hi, Ash.

No. 90312

it freaks me out so much how you can see her fucking skull. all i can think of is death when i look at her pictures, she makes me feel so sick… i really want her to recover because this is truly disgusting. 24 donuts….. stupid…

No. 90313

She tried to help the useless little shit.
You can't force people to get help if they don't want it.

No. 90314

Hi ashley

No. 90319

Nigger what no???!!!!!
How do i even come off as skeletor?

No. 90320


She's going to post a picture of herself taking them to Goodwill lol

No. 90322

Were you the one who thought she has lanugo on her arm? Because that was not lanugo. That was just normal hair. On her face though, fuck yes there is lanugo.

No. 90323


Oh noe. I hope you can forgive me for thinking you were skeletor!!! What an insult. I am sorry. It was the last sentence you wrote. It reminded me of things Ashley's written in the past.

No. 90324

File: 1430273433312.jpg (31.82 KB, 497x285, fauxpas.JPG)

this kinda thing

No. 90325

File: 1430273493155.jpg (271.09 KB, 1280x1280, tumblr_nmnwcd0ULX1upnbl4o1_128…)

~professional glitter glue~

No. 90327


That arm hair is normal? It's INCHES long. You could practically braid it.

No. 90330

Oh my god it is not inches long. Yes, that's normal arm hair. It just looks longer because she's emaciated.
For more information, please search "myth of growing hair after death."

No. 90334

Nah I've always said this cunt doesn't want help. Fuck her can't wait till her fat ass is dead.

No. 90335

That was interesting. Thank you. That pic above full size is disturbing in so many ways.

No. 90336

That looks like shit, but I know her dumb fans are gonna pay to have one done.

No. 90338

I think it's cool. I'm going to buy several.

No. 90339

You can't buy things from yourself, Ashley

No. 90341

Why would anyone want a phone case covered in glitter? I usually have my phone in my pocket or my pocketbook. I don't want glitter all over my shit.

No. 90342

Well by all means, please tell us who the 24 donuts were for! If you gave them to a food pantry or the homeless, you would have plastered a photo of it on tumblr. #positive #charity

No. 90343

Does anyone know how tall E is?

No. 90344

I use a cover where you slot your phone in and it's got a front cover like a book because I don't want the screen scratched. Those stickers wouldn't even last a day's worth of playing Candy Crush and you're right - glitter gets everywhere.

I like the idea that she can make a case with 1000 stickers.

Ooooh. I read it on one of her pics but I've forgotten now. I think she posted it recently? Someone's going to know.

No. 90347

This is so pathetic.

No. 90350

Erika's such a bitch. She suits a blonde pixie cut, dark pixie cut, long blonde hair, long brown wig. I still haven't found ONE HAIRSTYLE that suits me.

No. 90353

Ohohoho. You got me with the first sentence, Anon. I almost got defensive. About to post some Erika stuff from her recent Instagrams. Not sure how I feel about it.

No. 90355

Ahahaha - no need to be defensive. I was looking at her ig trying to find the height thing and that thought about her hair occurred to me. It's difficult for one person to pull off different styles and colors, but she does.

I'd post what you have. It's out in the public, so I don't think it's anything she'd rather people not see. We all look at her account anyway.

No. 90357

IN FACT I'm pretty sure her height's mentioned because she wasn't sure what height she was and kept giving different measurements. (Unless I'm thinking of someone else, but I don't think I am).

No. 90358

wait though, I might be thinking of the realdoll.

No. 90359

Ugh, my phone isn't letting me post it. Anyway, she's in Florida right now to surprise her kid for her birthday. They flew her out tonight. I just hope there are no setbacks, but I trust she knows what she is doing.

No. 90361

Indeed anon. I most wish there was a support Erika thread in /b/.

No. 90362

The way she's been talking, I really, really, really doubt anyone could convince her not to go back. Even if her husband pulled some stunt I can't see it'd stop her. Seems like her mind's 100% focused on recovery.

No. 90363

Anyone else worried Ash is going to see all the love for Erika and will try to lash out against her again the same way she did with the phone call?

No. 90365

It didn't stop Erika last time. If she can survive that, what else could Ashley do to terrorize her? It's not like she can stealthily sneak up on her in her wheelchair and lunge a knife at her. Fuck Ashley.

No. 90367

Only if Erika gets more attention.I think she tends to ignore unless they infringe on her "territory".

No. 90369

Ashley's territory is Pity Palace. She gets sent crap, so that makes her feel loved. Erika's way beyond that. The attention she's getting is support, and that's not something Ash wants.

No. 90378

To touch upon this, I think the coverage she gets in these threads is fair enough. I mean, it's really fun to get excited for her but I think the less we have about her online, the better for her in the long run but in these threads I think it's fair game. I'm just saying we don't want to draw extra attention that may not be as well intentioned as ours.

That's what worries me. Yustas poses the biggest risk in this getaway.

Ashley already dealt the lowest blow possible and E bounced back. Buuuut, Ashley… If you are reading this and you pull something like that again, you'll probably find out what real cyberbullying is. I wouldn't go that far, but some posters might. Just a fair warning. :/

I hope.

No. 90380

Not a threat by the way, just a prediction. Hope it all stays quiet.

No. 90383

If I weren't so busy (fucking lazy)I would start a supportive Erika thread+ on /b/. Pls someone with th e research and archive skills help!

No. 90384


Read >>90378
I really think that would be a bad idea, guys. The less of a trail we leave of her, the better.

No. 90386


Yeah, it's bad enough someone dug up her nudes. Not everyone here is nice. I think it's better to just talk to her directly and look at her instagram on your own than to post her shit here.

No. 90387

File: 1430278412962.jpg (31.69 KB, 442x331, IMG_20150428_232905.jpg)

I agree for her own protection.
Also, some good news.

No. 90388

Plus, people are putting her on a pedestal which is pretty unfair to her. Erika is human.

No. 90389

Yustas had a shock when he realized how sick Erika is. He'd have to be the biggest cunt in the universe to do anything to stop her getting her health back. Whatever's been said about him, I'd think not knowing if Erika was going to pull through has given him a wake up call.

Don't even think negative things. Superstitious maybe, but best to think positive.

I'd agree with this. I hope she doesn't feel massive pressure to do well and fast because she feels she was letting down followers and donators and people who care when she hits a rough patch. I'd feel pressure, so idk. Maybe tone it down a bit.

No. 90390

How much blood did you vomit this time, miss trashley?

No. 90392




No. 90394


Can we all agree not to then? I'd be very worried. I know people with ill intentions could find these threads just as well, but it's kind of masked by Ashley's bullshit.

Agreed!! I mean, we cannot expect perfection from a human being. Plus recovery is a roller-coaster, not a straight incline. We're going to see her sliding back sometimes and I hope everyone is prepared for that and won't flip on her the second things don't look as bright.


No. 90395

she is human but she is trying to better herself. We can at least encourage her. Why focus on the negatives?

No. 90398

Let's not put E at risk with our support. I know most people have good intentions, but there are always creeps and sociopaths out there who just want to fuck with people regardless of their situation.

No. 90399

I think what Anon is saying that's we're holding her to a standard that is unrealistic. Yeah, she's a great person, she's doing awesome, but us always expecting nothing but the best is only going to harm her. I think Anon meant we shouldn't have unrealistic expectations that will put pressure on her.

No. 90404

i'm going to leave her comments on her instagram and not write any more about her here. i can't tell others what to do, but it seems the best option to me.

No. 90406

Leave room for her to make mistakes and let her know we aren't expecting a miraculous recovery without any bumps in the road. She'll need support the most when the 'pink cloud' wears off. Basically in recovery situations for the first 3 weeks or a month you're gung-ho, nothing can stop you, you feel great… but then life happens and that feeling of euphoria wears off and it becomes something you have to work hard at to keep in check. It happens to a lot of addicts… It doesn't foretell failure or anything, it's quite common. Things just get a little harder around then.

This may happen, may not. Just my first thought.

No. 90408

I would be inclined to agree if I hadn't seen this. >>89985
If something changes and she finds us detrimental I'll deal with that then.

No. 90412

I don't think she gives a shit if we talk about her.

No. 90420

It worries her, but is starting to worry less and less. It scares her a little though. But then again >>89985

She says we have been of use though and I'd trust her judgement in saying that so I agree that we should be able to talk about her.

No. 90442

why..so you can figure out her BMI? or some other disordered comparing? i can't think of any good reason someone would want to know that..

No. 90444


Yep. So many people ask her on her instagram too.

No. 90462

She's 5'6.

No. 90486

Maybe Ashley's mom prefers her this way so she can have a ""baby"" to look after.

No. 90521

Wait, how did this turn back to her mother again. Even if she prefers her that way to keep as a baby, no one would want their daughter to be that thin. Just because she's skinny it doesn't make her like a baby again, isn't she more like a frail old lady by now?

No. 90527

Back to ash.

Let's give her ~The benefit of doubt~ and say she is not binging on 24 donuts by herself… who would these donuts be for? Her mother? A "trophy" of sorts that she can stare at until they go rotten?

C'mon. Nobody is that stupid, ash.

No. 90528

Hi Rebecca.

No. 90535

I still want a phone case from Ash but I don't have an iphone 4 :S

No. 90599

Topkek. Nice one.

No. 90608

No. 90614

Why would you want to buy one?

No. 90635

such a waste of money. can't this bitch torrent anything?

No. 90638

what the fuck?

This the first time I heard her voice

No. 90639

File: 1430326613586.jpg (9.42 KB, 225x225, 1tunVux.jpg)

can't torrent food. if all she has was gift cards to fast food places on her wishlist that would look sus.

No. 90640


*Abd I'm pretty shock. Based on how you all were speaking, I imagined a gravel-like smoker voice that's kinda low pitched. Damn.

No. 90666

i was quite shocked at it too. she sounds like a child and an old lady both at once.
in a way it goes with the first two things come to mind when looking at her, which are "old" and "sick".
there's this anorexic woman i saw in a docu once. she was about 25 and looked like she's stuck in a 9 yearold's body. sounded like it as well.

No. 90673

she can still ask for her stupid shit plastic keychains and ugly bracelets. just not shit you can get for free online. those dvds alone probably were something like 70 bucks.

No. 90679

yes, i feel like that's what most normal people would do, but she knows people will buy this kind of shit for her. of course she's gonna ask for stuff worth asking for.

No. 90680


Imagining that voice coming out of that face gives me the heebie jeebies.

Also dat vocal tremor

No. 90686

File: 1430333906403.png (129.09 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-14-54-58…)

No. 90687

File: 1430333943285.png (119.79 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-14-55-32…)

No. 90688

I thought you can't deco jelly cases because the shit will just peel off?

No. 90689

I know, right?

No. 90694

Oh Jesus this is so freakin sweet

No. 90697

File: 1430335299253.jpg (151.24 KB, 640x960, image.jpg)

As also updated her fb, just in case you were wondering how she felt about those donuts.

No. 90701

someone on her IG asked her how the donuts were and she responded that she didn't eat any. Riiiight.

No. 90705

What is Ash up to on IG? Could some kind anon screenshot any interesting comments? PLEASEE? TwT

No. 90708

File: 1430337421333.png (254.18 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-15-52-50…)

Ash's dad is mentioned. Him.

No. 90711

NSFW or life in general. I thought of Ashley as soon as I saw this. Please don't ask how I found it.

No. 90718

Trigger warning

No. 90723

I'm not anorexic and I have pretty long arm hair. It' not that abnormal.

No. 90724


Well, it it really eating if you throw it up afterwards within minutes?

No. 90725

She probably just chewed them up and spit them out. A lot of anorexic chicks don't swallow.

No. 90727

File: 1430339087536.jpg (44.06 KB, 612x612, eb0b908dfeb112c47152fe6a22826f…)

No. 90736

She also said the blue wig was her real hair, so…

No. 90738


No. 90741


I can verify this, I don't have a screenshot but another Anon might.

A follower asked what happened to her blue hair and she responded, 'it doesn't last forever' implying the color faded out and magically returned to the previous color.

No. 90742

Screenshot was posted here. She's saying it was dye that washed out.


No. 90743

She's delusional…

No. 90744

ayy lmao

No. 90746

File: 1430340957944.png (13.75 KB, 429x106, ewwww.png)

What is it about Erika that attracts people like this?

No. 90749

File: 1430341202511.jpg (30.99 KB, 393x253, delusional.jpg)

here's the screenshot. more evidence to show how utterly insane this skeleton is.

No. 90750

idk, but that's weird shit. of course this person's (hopefully) joking, but said to the wrong person, could make them feel uncomfortable.

she brings out some maternal instinct in people probably. being attractive is possibly a large part of it as well. if she wasn't pretty or had a shit personality, would people feel the same way? i think not.

No. 90752

People usually feel the same way about Ashley when the first meet her, so I guess I understand.

No. 90756

That person's comment makes my skin crawl. That is not okay.

No. 90760

typically if you're anorexic, you'll grow excess hair to keep warm. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lanugo

No. 90762

Hey Ash, we wanna hear more about your dad, even if it's your warped side of the story.

No. 90764

That onefixation guy has given me a bad vibe since I first started following Erika. He just seems entirely inappropriate and gross, and from what I've gathered it seems like he follows a bunch of vulnerable girls, particularly those with EDs. (he followed my IG after I started commenting on Erika's.)

I don't know how close you are with him, Erika, but please be careful.

No. 90796

Oh wow. Reading his comments to her, I'd assumed he was a woman; is it sexist of me to find those comments far more creepy coming from a man?

No. 90799

Screenshots of his IG? anything interesting? Dig up some info on this guy, plz.

No. 90803

His instagram is disappointingly dull and there's not much posted. Screenshots coming right up.

Nah, I don't think so. I'd be much less concerned if it were a woman making those comments, but hey, maybe I'm sexist, too. :P

Seems he struggles with some mental illnesses of his own, so maybe he just lacks the proper social skills not to come off as a creeper.

No. 90805

File: 1430346601877.jpg (93.02 KB, 913x544, onefixation.jpg)

This is probably the weirdest one. No context whatsoever. I hope she deleted her IG while in her recovery and didn't like… die or something. I assume that's what happened judging from his tags. Still kinda weird he posted this, but maybe that's just me.

No. 90807

File: 1430346862188.jpg (109.41 KB, 912x543, onefixation2.jpg)

The only photo of him.

No. 90811

From the sound of it I think he has an eating disorder.

No. 90816

File: 1430347242742.jpg (134.16 KB, 912x541, onefixation1.jpg)

Yeah, could be. He is trying to lose weight for sure, but as far as I can tell from his IG he is going about it in a healthy manner.

No. 90819

H-how is 99 pounds at 5'6 in a male healthy???

Sarcasm, anon???

No. 90820

r u retarded

No. 90821

…My bad. Never post under the influence, guys. I look a damn fool.

No. 90822

Haha, he was using kilograms, not pounds.

No. 90825

Lol, it happens. ;)

No. 90826


Oh man, that made me laugh. Ok, maybe he's in the beginning stages and is looking for trigger warning thinspo trigger warning.

No. 90828

Ok, he just added me on IG. Taking a good look, he's harmless. Just another follower with depression/possible ED.

No. 90839

Yeah, he seems pretty harmless. Just super flirty/affectionate toward Erika in a gross way (that's my perception, anyway. Maybe some girls like that.)

No. 90850

Fuck I wrote this >>90750 but I didn't know it was a man. That makes a BIG difference. That takes creepy to a new ugly level.

No. 90853

No it isn't sexist IMO. It's gone from me thinking it was some quirky female with a possible girl crush to something more threatening.

No. 90855

I disagree… I'm not getting the feeling that there is some sort of sexual thrill here. I'm going to look around his IG more and see.

No. 90856

I've commented on Erika's photos in the past and as soon as I started he asked for an add. I have no idea why he'd want to add me, except that I commented on Erika's pics.

No. 90857

There's really not much on his IG. The stuff he says that makes me uncomfortable is usually found on Erika's photos, the kidnapping one was the weirdest by far, though. At least of what I've seen from him.

No. 90859

It looks like he's desperate for someone to love. He's probably crushing on Erika. Probably harmless, but that comment's inappropriate considering that they're not long time friends.

No. 90860

File: 1430350031721.png (106.04 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-19-21-13…)

He says 'us' implying ED. Buuuut there is

No. 90861

File: 1430350084614.png (117.89 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-19-23-21…)

No. 90863

I've left her comments and he never added me, no fair! Just kidding. Of course, my profile's public, I don't post about my problems, and I don't look underweight, so I'm not a magnet for certain types of followers, LOL. /diary post

No. 90864

File: 1430350297037.jpg (23.27 KB, 375x150, shudder.JPG)

No. 90865

WOAH. Where is this guy's fedora??

No. 90866

He would've been disappointed when he saw me. I barely use IG for my own photos, just use it to follow and comment.

No. 90868

I was completely wrong, this guy, ED or not is creepy af unless he's like, 15.

No. 90869

File: 1430350463670.jpg (15.9 KB, 381x105, ugh.JPG)

he's persistent

No. 90873


Creepy as fuck, no doubt about it, and I wouldn't want him commenting on my shit but if he's going to be creepy at LEAST he's being encouraging (saying she looks better every day as opposed to a myriad of other things a creep could say in this situation that could be harmful) I'M DEFINITELY NOT condoning his behavior he's very creepy I'm just really glad he's not worse.

No. 90874

I don't think this guy is necessarily harmless. I think appearing awkward and non-threatening is his MO. He must have a fetish.

No. 90875

Slightly OT, yay for other INFJs! Although I took the real Meyers Briggs, not an amended Internet version.

No. 90878

The problem I have with any future comments on Erika's pics is I don't want to say the wrong thing. Already I think she's looking better. I'm not seeing weight gain, but the color in her face is coming back. I'm not sure if I'd been sexually abused if I'd appreciate pushy comments like this guy is making. I was raped years ago, and sometimes I think I can over react to comments from males although these men are obvious creeps. Idk. He's complimented her intelligence, which is good but all this date thing…I still think it's inappropriate.

No. 90880

I think we know what his one fixation is!

No. 90881

I agree…

No. 90884

I'm not into Japanese pop culture so I googled his kik name and shikijoukyou is a hentai comic?!?

No. 90894


No, he's completely inappropriate. Those comments about kidnapping her and her kids make my stomach churn. She's sick, has admitted that she isn't good at having healthy relationships, and at her weight her logic and reasoning isn't at it's best (even though she is very smart, which helps to compensate). She's vulnerable, he knows it, and he's being a total CREEP. He has a history of doing the same with other ED girls so I think it's a sick fascination/fetish he has.

No. 90898


Ah, sorry, I didn't know he was the same guy who posted those ones, I haven't been paying enough attention. I thought he just posted the one about how she's looking better and what she's doing is amazing and the thing about them being the 2%. Fuck. Sorry. I really didn't know he was the messed up one who said about kidnapping her, that's completely twisted.

No. 90899

Found this, so it's very likely he's into ED girls.

No man or woman with an ounce of sensitivity would even think about making their … romantic … feelings for Erika known to her right now. So not the right time to go there. He needs to back off.

No. 90900

File: 1430352019674.jpg (61.52 KB, 998x526, a.JPG)

Duh, forgot pic

No. 90902

I think his old IG name was shikijoukyou. There're comments to anorexic girls made in that name on google search.

No. 90912

From a random google search:
[shikijoukyou] (n) sex mania

Can anyone verify?

No. 90915

File: 1430352736999.jpg (43.6 KB, 814x401, a.JPG)

this comes up when i googled the meaning.

No. 90929

File: 1430353408621.jpg (75.64 KB, 870x494, a.JPG)


No. 90930

File: 1430353454646.jpg (27.61 KB, 543x148, a.JPG)

No. 90933

File: 1430353725826.jpg (71.34 KB, 847x426, a.JPG)

another girl

No. 90943

What. The. Fuck.

No. 90947


He's like those creepers who go to AA meetings to prey on women. Eww.

No. 90950

I'm glad I learned to drink in moderation because I hate those meetings… 'by the grace of god i'm here today wah wah wah' 'keep it simple stupid wah wah' This guy and those guys are one in the same.

No. 90952

creeps and born agains prey on vulnerable people. he's a creep, but it's a bit of a comfort to know there's a harem of women he's creepy towards and not just Erika. if she doesn't respond to him then he'll fuck off hopefully.

No. 90955

She reads this thread so hopefully she'll see this if she already doesn't know it. It sucks he hides his fetishism under a facade of 'being one of them' and 'supportive'. It kind of turns his compliments into a punch in the stomach.

No. 90961

I wonder if he's posted on Ashley's instagram. Maybe she's too extreme for him.

No. 90963

I had a think if he's doing anything her other supporters are doing that makes it creepier (and the other girls). It really is how he brings up being horny into a discussion about how to control eating, and being all fatal attraction towards them. That tells me he's a dick.

Maybe it's Neckbeard :shriek:

No. 90970

Can anyone take a brief look into this possibility? Ash never followed me back because I don't advertise my anxiety disorder like a little faggot on my social media accounts. :(

No. 90976

I'm sure someone will. I don't follow her. The #giveaways never contained anything I wanted.

No. 90977

I'm also wondering if he is in those fetish communities on vk?

No. 90978

Difficult to tell. He doesn't give much of himself away and I don't fancy striking up a conversation on kik.

No. 90982

Thanks, anon.

Looking at all these new screenshots… yuck. I stand by what I said earlier, please be careful, Erika.

No. 91001

Ah, I hope so.
GUUUYS. If any anon can see Ashley's IG can you take a peek and see if this creep comments on her shit too?

No. 91005

File: 1430358047653.png (123.59 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-21-37-05…)

Is this about us? :o

No. 91006

File: 1430358202391.png (124.12 KB, 480x800, Screenshot_2015-04-29-21-37-33…)

No. 91007

One of her followers commented on her contouring a while ago. I thought this comment was cute because we'd mentioned that comment here recently and maybe she'd seen it.

I'll find that pic.

No. 91008

I can't see the original comment on there, but yogachickie said something like You're contouring your cheekbones - WHY? The rest is here

No. 91010

File: 1430358384786.jpg (25.07 KB, 390x228, a.JPG)

oh, here it is…read on

No. 91011

I don't like Ashley but I hope she sees this thread and blocks that guy if he tries to get close. He seems like a predator under the guise of an awkward neckbeard.

No. 91012

Would she care so long as he sent her stuff? I get what you're saying though.

No. 91013

Lol probs not but she's already paranoid and I dont think Ashley deserves to feel physically threatened. Unless we're talking about getting her committed bc I'm all for that.

No. 91083

I've noticed him commenting, but thought he was just another harmlessly awkward/clueless little autistic woman like theforestcat/joltography. This is creepy as fuck. Erika should block him and so should everyone else.

No. 91088

I have to agree with you. No one deserves to feel physically threatened.

No. 91092


I also thought he was some awkward woman until he was brought up in the thread. The kidnapping comment takes on a whole new meaning.

No. 91094

I also think he took that personality test multiple times until he got INFJ result like Erika.

No. 91097

What scares me the most is the fact he might live in Florida too. I've had a stalker before and he would leave creepy messages like that before he actually went ahead and did them. These are red flags being raised, especially after anon has uncovered his disturbing history.

No. 91098

he sounds like a creepy guy I used to follow on twitter? thebeast or thehound

No. 91100

to clarify I had an ED twitter and never posted pictures of myself but he had quite a few ED followers and seemed to be one himself but it was odd all around and he was always pervy

No. 91102

Especially since he mentioned the kids. Who the fuck does that?

No. 91103

I thought he was a 17 year old one direction fan.

No. 91105


Oh, I thought he was somewhere in the UK/Europe because of the kgs

No. 91106

Maybe, or maybe he's just being pretentious.

No. 91109

His IG led me to believe he is in Argentina.

No. 91110

Good, then Erika/Ashley/everyone else need only block him.

No. 91114

File: 1430369245536.jpg (29.43 KB, 608x602, a.JPG)

His keyboard is disgustingly filthy.

No. 91119

Jizz and Doritos.

No. 91126

I bet he doesn't wash his hands after he's peed either. His onefixation is definitely NOT cleaning.

No. 91129


He follows this sad cutter too. Jesus Christ. Erika please block him. He gets off on vulnerable women.

No. 91133

Looks like he's been doing this for a while.

No. 91134

File: 1430370799179.jpg (121.35 KB, 1024x613, 1.JPG)

13 months ago

No. 91135

he WAS formerly shijoukyou on IG. he's changed the username.

No. 91137

>… men don't like…
every time

No. 91139

I kind of want to send this girl the link to this thread now.

No. 91141

Noticed that too.

No. 91145

Of course! That's because a woman is a blank canvas for a man to mold! We must be their idea of perfection or else they make us feel more worthless than we sometimes do in this patriarchal society. :)

No. 91146

No. 91147

File: 1430371341343.jpg (75.93 KB, 1016x604, b.JPG)


No. 91149

File: 1430371438033.jpg (17.24 KB, 395x123, c.JPG)

I looked at her account earlier. Really liked her for her comment here.

No. 91150

File: 1430371488445.png (290.58 KB, 922x362, onefixationcreeper.png)

No. 91165

It's sexist against women, because you're underestimating our ability to be dangerous lunatics, and it's sexist against men, because you're assuming they must be psycho, rather than just socially retarded.

No. 91170

I don't see it that way. Women are generally a lot more open and affectionate with each other.

No. 91172

I've known plenty of men that are open and affectionate that way. Maybe that's why my go-to assumption is "Socially retarded until proven otherwise." And I've known women that are genuinely kind of dangerous toward the objects of their affection. I've had 2 female friends that ended up being stalkers. One ended up being arrested for it.

And frankly, saying something like that toward someone you follow on IG, that has talked to you maybe a couple of times, that you effectively have no relationship with, is weird as hell, period.

Either way, this guy clearly gives zero fucks about, or is oblivious to, boundaries. He's either getting off on vulnerable women, or he's got some wonky knight-in-shining-armor delusion.

No. 91178

I just stop reading after that type of shit.

No. 91180

>you want to be anorexic . that's disgusting. men don't like..


No. 91182

Why do women take shots like this and post them online? So bad

No. 91190

How's going back there, in the 19th century? Comstocker.

No. 91191

It's really fitting that the caption cuts off exactly at the end of 'men don't like,' lel.

I didn't mean to derail, I just thought that was really funny.

No. 91234

that insta triggered me. smh are there still people who post their cuts on social media? i thought that trend died in 2010

No. 91235

pretty girls who are anorexic make me so sad.

No. 91236

sorry, i realize this sounded a lot like the "men don't like…" comment above.. I just mean it makes me sad to see women who are really vibrant and lovely succumbing to such a terrible disease ;_; because it tears your life apart and makes it so every ounce of happiness you thought you had vanishes. breaks my little kokoro

i guess i'm preaching to the choir here though. sorrz ignore me

No. 91257

Nah, comments from a man when worded that way are far more creepy, although women can get on that level too.

No. 91262

File: 1430385043254.jpg (236.06 KB, 2208x1242, image.jpg)

Of course it was. There would be no challenge or ambition in life without a fair critique..that said, it's easy to distinguish ones jealousy or momentary infatuation with an image created. I'm human, I like watching adventure time with the kids, I still sing songs from The Lion King while I'm driving with them, windows down, I don't care. People either love me or hate me, I'm nuetral, except when people are kind to me I tend to get a bit shy and overly compassionate (mothering -.-). That said, I can be a badass bitch to the assholes who dare say something in public to piss me off or anyone else off. A lot of people seem worried I'm going to relapse or fall back, but, I have a nasty habit of being an extremist/perfectionist and when I set a goal I will use the same strength I have in the past to succeed. I was told Mai would be fed through a G-tube her whole life because she couldn't suck or swallow as a baby. I was a 20yr old mother with no car, no support, just the saving my ex and I had from working on the island and a place to live. I utilised every skill I could until she did it. It took three sleepless years, literally. Every two hours day/night, three years, no fucks, I did what I knew was right. My story with Mai is still often touched apon with the LLLI as an impossibly possible endeavour. I really believe I can keep this up as long as I put that same heart into it and come on…look at that kid. They told me she would certainly be failure to thrive. I was barely twenty and I accomplished something so freaking awe inspiring. She never required any supplementation and grew at a rate above average ?.
I am human, however, this is true. I walk into things and trip and do dumb shit all of the time too. The nurse and I made super condensed jello for the hell of it 7 packages of lime and strawberry to two cups of water..:it was like an unbreakable jellyfish that tasted like haribo gold bears. I also get excited over crayons at resteraunts. Simple/complex. When I write online I'm usually just brain dumping thoughts so I can look over them later, hence the terrible auto corrects and somewhat incoherent seeming run on sentences. In person, I'm just entertaining and ridiculous. Sorry for impedeing on this thread. You guys really did help me immensly with my body Dismorphia. I can't say thank you enough. Seriously. I ended up talking to Gia as well and she's actually an incredible sweetheart and nowhere near as intimidating as I expected.

No. 91263

Erika, you deserve the best. I just read this and I couldn't help crying because I am so happy for your recovery. You are the strongest human being I've ever seen.

No. 91268

Shhh. I'm sick of wallowing in my mental pain. I just want to be that strong again.

No. 91274


You're not impeding this thread at all, I and I'm sure the rest of this board are always delighted to hear that you're doing well.
I think we've kind of found a champion in you that we're able to cheer on amongst all the snark and bitching that goes on throughout the rest of the site lol

Ah I can't wait to see you physically strong again, you're gonna walk through life smacking down hoes like a badass bitch.

No. 91275

We love you, Erika!! I'm so happy that you are changing your life, for yourself and for your children. You are truly an inspiration. ♥

No. 91277

Your girls are going to be so inspired by you. They'll be so proud of their mama, the fighter. They're young, but I'm sure they've got a basic sense right now that you're doing something amazing. My mom is an addict, and some of my earliest memories are of incredible joy when she managed to stay sober. Your girls are going to be so happy for you, believe me. Yes, of course you're going to be a better mom when you're no longer be on the verge of dying, but your recovery, what it means, will stick with them for the rest of their lives.

No. 91281

I'm so glad you're doing well. The posts your husband made had me concerned because it seemed like you were not going to make it. I hope you have a nice recovery.

No. 91300

I hope that as you get better you are able to form healthier rl relationships. I know you are strong, but the pro-Ana people who follow you scare me; I don't want them to derail your recovery. People are not as scary as you think. We all have insecurities and we all want to be liked. You just have to be a little brave and, reach out, and you might be pleasantly surprised :) I'm sure treatment will help with that. The DBT groups on communicating (like interpersonal effectiveness) helped me a lot, even though DBT does sound like it was created for children, at times.

No. 91301

I agree. You have some disturbing followers, but hopefully they will either be inspired by you or fuck off once you're completely recovered.

No. 91306

Also, you probably qualify for free/cheap legal services. When you're finished with treatment, you should look for a pro bono attorney/legal services group to help with Yustas' immigration situation. Your in-law basically stole the 600 you gave him to help with citizenship. Florida has many immigration attorneys who help with those issues…

No. 91336

i follow ash.. ill look today

No. 91339

Oh my god, you go, girl! I hope you and the kids succeed so badly. You inspire me to be as persistant and caring as you are. You know we support you. :)

No. 91355

I have a feeling ash is rolling in her chair grave since E started posting in her thread and stealing all her attention. Ayy lmao

No. 91364

I honestly cannot wait to see her explode. she's a terrible person.

No. 91377

I hope it inspires her to seek help

No. 91378

I actually had a dream about Erika last night.

In the dream, we had both individually volunteered to help an ill woman move into her new apartment. Afterwards, we didn't talk at all, just sat on a couch and ate grapefruit.

It was a rather pleasant dream.

No. 91391

Erika, I'm so happy you've visited us! You are literally welcome here anytime. We are so happy for you!

Me too… My hopes aren't very high though.

That's kind of weird, Anon.

No. 91397

>chair grave
I shouldn't have laughed as hard as I did.

No. 91409


I'm the same with crayons at Pizza Hut and the bowling place. This comment made me feel less of an outsider heh.

She won't.

No. 91412

Nah i don't think its weird when you hang on lolcow. I sometimes dream about Pixyteri

No. 91414

File: 1430419443770.jpg (9.13 KB, 339x65, lol.jpg)

I chuckled.

No. 91415

He MUST be following Ashley, or at least requested to follow and been turned down. He's totally adding Erika's friends.

No. 91416

He said he's never seen a psychiatrist as an adult. That means his ED etc are all self diagnosed.

No. 91417

Oh yeah, and if you're reading this Erika, please tell onefixation to give his keyboard a clean with antibacterial wipes.

No. 91425

File: 1430420579040.jpg (30.82 KB, 540x732, 2015-04-30_20-15-50_1.jpg)

I think so too, he's probably just using it to have common ground with those girls, to somehow get close to them. I doubt it's a fetish. He looks like a neckbeard from what i can tell (pic related). Cute cat though.

No. 91445

You found him. Nice work. He's definitely allergic to housework. Less poems, more damp cloths plix.

No. 91463

This feels so wrong.

No. 91469

I got this bloody song stuck in my head for weeks..

No. 91474

No. 91478

Erika you have such a cute singing voice.

No. 91488


She sounds so happy, and so enjoying being able to be a mom for her kids. I just wanna melt.


No. 91507

It IS wrong. You can even see how he operates. Trying to gain trust and reeling them in by appearing uber interested in what they have to say. Idk about high iq but he's definitely high sex drive predator. I wouldn't be surprised if he's found this place by now.

No. 91508

That's what food does! She's rediscovering what having more energy feels like. After so long weak and tired, it's got to feel pretty amazing.

No. 91520

That other girl, benzobambi, she just radiates insecurity and vulnerability. He seems like he goes for women that he thinks he can control.

No. 91531


Yep. I bet he goes to AA and Al-Anon meetings for the same reason. To find damaged women.

No. 91536

I bet he's terrified of women in real life.

No. 91540


He would be terrified of me because after reading his comments I want to punch something. I am almost certain that he reads this thread and is going to start posting excuses about having an ED or having been bullied and unable to relate to "normal" women.

No. 91542

File: 1430431218784.png (1.17 MB, 1452x2000, 1370824304378.png)

Ashley won't seek help. She LOVES being as sick as she is. It's the only way to get the attention she so desperately craves, even when it will cost her life. How else will she manipulate hundreds of people to buy her gifts and favors? She is 100% corrupted by the disease. What little consciousness and humanity is left of her is trapped inside her head, screaming at herself for being a monster. But she's not going to stop. It's an insatiable craving for destruction; not only she is addicted to food, she is addicted to Schadenfreude. She's toxic, she's insane, and she's evil.

This is why she's a lolcow.

No. 91543

Every single one of the women he follows is mentally ill in some way. If I lived in Argentina, I would track him down and report him to the police. If he does this online, there are probably women in real life that he's preying on as well. I'd love to see his Facebook.

Maybe Ashley will realize that she can get more attention by recovering. She is not getting much attention these days.

No. 91544


She is controlled by her disease, but I've seen enough people before and after being re-fed to know that she would probably be much nicer if she were in treatment and physically healthier. It's sad.

No. 91546

Yup. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Ash is hangry as fuck.

No. 91559

He follows me thinking I must be vulnerable or sick. I've never had any communication with him, but maybe it's playtime.

No. 91562

She'd be nicer to an extent but I feel she'd still be annoyings fuck as seen circa /b/

No. 91563

Annoying as*
Fucking autocorrect.

No. 91565

Do it and post the results here.

No. 91566

She'd still probably be a lolcow, but she'd be nicer.

No. 91572

I feel like we're just waiting for her to die. It makes me feel kinda bad.

No. 91580

I have a question for those of you that have never had an ED…

Do fat or obese people disgust you?

No. 91584

The problem I have with obese people is the problem I have with Ashley. I feel sick when I see obese people stuffing pies, burgers, cakes in their mouths. It annoys me when they complain about illnesses or pains related to overeating.

It's not their appearance that disgusts me it's their attitude to their health and not caring they're destroying their bodies.

I understand that their eating problem is possibly an ED reverse anorexia but when they don't even try or refuse help to lose weight it disgusts me.

When weigh begins to affect health is when someone should try to lose it.

Overweight people don't disgust me. Its obesity that does.

No. 91587

Even as someone who had ED I'm only really repulsed by people who are extremely morbidly obese or even very very thin (even people who weigh more than Ash). I don't think it's strictly related to ED to feel that way.

No. 91588

I agree with everything you said, but I will chime in with: obese people are unpleasant to look at. "Disgust" isn't what I feel seeing someone just walking around not doing anything, but still, their appearance doesn't cause a completely neutral emotion in me. It goes both ways though, overweight and underweight.

No. 91599

It's probably a natural reaction to see something unhealthy and feel a level of ew (for want of better word). It's when you see a person of average weight or slightly overweight and think ew, landwhale there's a problem mentally.

I personally think a voluptuous figure is hot. I've been overweight and thought meh until I was starting to get back and knee pains.

So I lost it.

No. 91607

Their physical appearance doesn't disgust or repulse me but it does amaze me. I was watching a guy in a coffee shop today and he was absolutely enormous. At minimum he was 300lbs. But he could still stand up and move around. He didn't have a mobility scooter or crutches or anything you see a lot of "bigger" people using. I was just in awe of how he managed to get himself up out of the chair, unaided, and walk across a shopping centre. Amazing.

It does bug me when super fat people complain about their aches and pains etc like lose the fucking weight if it bugs you so much it's not as difficult as you think it will be. "I have a bad back and my knees swell" well if you shift that extra 30lb you got goin' on you might see an improvement.

No. 91609

but see 'voluptuous' is variable for people these days. personally, sometimes i think what people call 'curvy' is actually just a really round person. what i consider to be voluptuous is someone who isn't an unhealthy weight but is far from underweight and their body has been generous with where it stores its fat. other people sometimes use the phrase 'voluptuous' to refer to people like tess holliday who is actually obese and unhealthy. i don't think she's disgusting but i think the attention she gets is. you know, the attention she gets for BEING fat and the amount of positive reinforcement that isn't 'body positivity' it's just as unhealthy as this pro-ana shit that's so popular with other people.

No. 91616

File: 1430440755556.jpg (563.19 KB, 500x858, tumblr_lzi1hxo2PH1qa70eyo1_128…)


This is the kind of body shape I mean by voluptuous. Obvious example, but…

Nigella Lawson as well, even though her recipes are unhealthy as fuck.

No. 91617

File: 1430440866551.jpg (58.61 KB, 468x640, article-1161142-018A38B0000004…)

Nigella looks weird when she slims down, but here I'd call her voluptuous.

No. 91618

those are good examples! i agree with both. it's just sometimes people use that word to mean people who aren't remotely their shape.

No. 91621

Tess Holliday is flat out obese. Morbidly.

No. 91622

I don't think a woman has to be super thin to be beautiful or even healthy, but I think that too many people use the term "curvy" to sugarcoat being at an actual unhealthy weight. Like that Trisha Paytas chick on YouTube.

No. 91626

Woah. I'd never heard of her so looked her up. I saw a youtube where she's eating cupcakes for 40 minutes. HUH?

No. 91630

Maybe that's why Ash bought 24 donuts. HER FIRST YOUTUBE VIDEO!!!

No. 91637

File: 1430442174993.jpg (394.74 KB, 611x329, 33vhz5e.jpg)

Oh yeah, she's a trainwreck. I'm actually surprised she hasn't reached lolcow status yet. That eating video was something else.

Watching Trisha eat for 40 minutes is kinda gross, watching an emaciated Ashley eat 24 donuts would be FASCINATING. Do it, Ash!

No. 91640

those nails

No. 91643

Those nails are so bad. It looks like someone cut up plastic squares and just stuck them on her hands rather than sculpting them onto her nails.

No. 91646

Eww. Ash would be less disgusting than this girl.

No. 91669

Is it up yet?

No. 91685

Re: Creepy, stalkerish dude

“Cognitive empathy is the ability to know what other people are feeling, and emotional empathy is the kind where you feel what they’re feeling.” Autistic people can be very empathetic – they feel other people’s pain – but are less able to recognise the cues we read easily, the smiles and frowns that tell us what someone is thinking. Psychopaths are often the opposite: they know what you’re feeling, but don’t feel it themselves. “This all gives certain psychopaths a great advantage, because they can understand what you’re thinking, it’s just that they don’t care, so they can use you against yourself.” (Chillingly, psychopaths are particularly adept at detecting vulnerability. A 2008 study that asked participants to remember virtual characters found that those who scored highly for psychopathy had a near perfect recognition for sad, unsuccessful females, but impaired memory for other characters.)"


No. 91688

>>a near perfect recognition for sad, unsuccessful females
This is why they're so vulnerable.

No. 91691


This is why my social media accounts are all extremely impersonal and private.

No. 91696

How old is she? It's impossible to tell by looks alone.
Sorry if this was asked before but I couldn't find an answer just by skimming.

No. 91698

No. 91715

This may be a bit off topic, but do you know, or suspect, what happened to Ash in those 5 years that she was gone?

No. 91720

How is it off topic? It's her thread, anyways. Well. She moved- and didn't handle it well. Nice big apartment to a shithole.

No. 91724

Did she move to a different city? Is that how she became so isolated?

No. 91729

I cried. You're amazing and strong and can get through this since I know you want this. Can't wait until your instagram is you playing with your kids in a park instead of in a hospital

No. 91733

Who knows, its really weird how these things end up manifesting at a later time. I mean, she alluded to wing sexually abused at a young age. In her youtube videos she seemed like a normal bratty kid.

No. 91737

And then she graduated from high school and moved to a new city where she didn't know anyone. She felt isolated and alone there, and her anorexia was able to take hold of her.

No. 91749

I wonder why she (you? the dashes and the fact that this has never been addressed before…idk) didn't go to community college in her "old" city? Then she could've saved money and transferred to a four-year university elsewhere

No. 91753

She couldn't afford it.

No. 91756


That sucks, and isn't all that uncommon, unfortunately.

No. 91796

I always find it so weird how Ashley and her mother interact in this video: https://youtu.be/T4XHRlmakFI?t=10
"Mom, shut up!"
"I can't."
"I know."
Sounds like they… get along?! I know things change but still…

No. 91811

I think she says 'Look at him'

No. 91836

Yeah she does.

No. 91842

File: 1430486337614.jpg (125.13 KB, 2208x1242, image.jpg)

Since you guys are awesome and I didn't wasn't creeps on IG to see this, but, for the ones who haven't seen my weight gain yet, check it! I'm getting my boobs back first? My stomach isn't concaved anymore, it's always happy and full. But I can clearly see here that my body IS coming back! (Thread de-rail) but again you guys helped me do this total 180.

No. 91846

Thank you so much for sharing, Erika.I usually can't stand it when people say stuff like this, but I do genuinely feel blessed to be able to see you become healthy and make progress in such leaps and bounds. KEEP ON GOING!

No. 91847

I am so so happy to see you striving to get better. I can't wait for the day when you've completed recovery and can enjoy life normally with no worries about your health <3

No. 91851

yay E! you're doing so great. you really are strong :)

No. 91852

I've been refeed from a low weight before I'm telling you this so that you don't freak out when you have more substantial weight gain. You will gain weight in your face and torso at first but DO NOT worry! It will all redistribute over time. You just have to be patient and trust in the process. Give your body time to heal. Furthermore, every pound you gain will not have a noticeable difference on your body. Your organs are weak and shrunken. Some of the weight needs to go to your organs to replenish them. It's like filling a plastic soda bottle. The bottle gets heavier over time, but the shape of the bottle doesn't change. Does that make sense?

No. 91853


Also, block the creeps may letting them stay on your Instagram you're letting them feel like their repugnant behavior is okay. Who cares if their feelings are hurt. It's your account, your life, and you don't need toxic people. I'm going to DM you about the legal services stuff when I get a chance later. Not that you have to worry about it now, I'm going to look up some places for you.

No. 91854

Moms creepy cackle though. She sounds like that awful baby YouTube video. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HttF5HVYtlQ

No. 91855

You're doing so amazing. Literally have tears in my eyes right now.

No. 91860


Yay Erika! Keep going, get healthy so you can be there for your girls for a long time and get back energy to do all the things you love!! (You used to do computer programming, right? I hope you can return to doing that if you want…we need more women in that field, those of us there are terribly under-represented…)

No. 91892


Erika I am an ex-anorexic myself currently experiencing a relapse.
I haven't eaten for 3 days now and I feel so dizzy and sick, but after seeing this I might go out and get some lunch. Thank you x

No. 91981


I have the biggest smile on my face. Don't ever worry about derailing these threads, you're not and you're always welcome to post/vent/talk/share here. I'm so happy for you and your children. You look fantastic and absolutely beautiful. <3

No. 91987

I don't agree. I think Trish has changed a lot. I believe that she doesn't have any ill intent, most of the lolcow worthy things she's done in her personal life are related to her upbringing and uhh perhaps mental illness/insecurity? She goes to therapy, and I think she has meds to help her control her emotions.

She's trying to make something of herself, but she goes through bouts of really needing validation and being so insecure that she feels the need to push people away from her.

No. 92002

Dude fucking eat something! Do you want to end up like ash? Go eat something yummy and healthy please.

No. 92008


>do you want to end up like ash?

Fuck god no D:

No. 92009

"I never pay attention to how food looks (unless it clearly looks past due date, right). to me, food is all about flavor and texture, but not how it looks. to see something pretty, I follow Erika on instagram."

I want to punch him in the dick.

No. 92010

It's refreshing to see someone in recovery not obsessing over the look of food.

That guy - he needs chemical castration at the very least.

No. 92011

He grosses me the fuck out. Can we report him for anything? I know Erika can handle his behavior, but what about these other women?

No. 92012

He's not breaking any rules :/ They don't even do much about accounts that break rules, so looks like he's free to be predatory.

No. 92022

I mentioned here I hadn't seen weight gain, but noticed your colour had come back. I also said I was shit scared of commenting if I did see weight gain in case it was triggering.

I didn't see any gain, but in this photo it's noticeable that the texture and colour of your skin is looking healthier. The fact you're feeling better is just…priceless. When you start nourishing your brain, you'll find it helps with depression. Malnourishment affects every fibre of your body in a negative way.

I'll stfu now, you know this already. Just to say we're always here for you.

No. 92025

File: 1430514727426.jpg (53.5 KB, 637x480, Capture-8.jpg)

Pic related.

No. 92027

i don't think he lurks here, otheriwse he would have shut the fuck up already

No. 92029

theforestcat can't seem to keep quiet about this board though. i'm expecting her to blab. you know what she's like.

No. 92031

i hope she does, maybe he'll fuck off then

No. 92032

File: 1430515328236.jpg (51.24 KB, 487x414, fuckoff.JPG)

Meanwhile, Ashley tries to make herself relevant again but welcoming anon questions to her tumblr inbox. Sry bae, you're as stale as those donuts you haven't yet eaten (apparently).

No. 92033

I don't know, I think she's afraid of us.

No. 92034

Just make the fucking videos already, holy shit

No. 92036

Must be butthurt knowing E doesn't mind our presence.

"I will decide on the most interesting inquiries"
LOL, like it's a competition and they have to win her favour. BORING.

No. 92038


No. 92039

Little does she realize that she could make a ton of money talking about her eating disorder and enabling monetization. What a dumb fucking bitch. If I were her, I'd milk that for all it was worth.

No. 92040

File: 1430515713055.jpg (9.04 KB, 232x169, crying-baby.jpg)

Moved to a smaller apartment. First world problems eh.

No. 92041

>>The apartment was smaller so I became smaller.

No. 92043

I'm surprised theforestcat hasn't unfollowed E yet.

No. 92045

Oy fucking vey.

No. 92047

File: 1430516029430.jpg (149.7 KB, 839x524, nepal earthquake 2.jpg)

She's so resourceful.

But…but…Erika's her mother figure!

Ash hated moving to a smaller apartment. Meanwhile in Nepal…

No. 92049

the forest cat wants to protect Erika from the big bad meanies (lolcow)in an effort to build intimacy and prove to E what a good person she is. Is TFC not Ashley's groupie anymore?

No. 92050

Dat hairy billygoat face.

No. 92051

Isn't she the same age as Erika, or close anyway? How is E her mother figure?

No. 92052

I've seen her commenting on Ashley's tumblr posts. Perhaps she hasn't sent Ash any amazing gifts yet and has cooled towards her.

No. 92053

True. Ash doesn't want to be friends with anyone who doesn't send her stuff.

No. 92054

That pic is all kinds of wrong. I imagine her pitiful voice saying "a dozen donuts and a dozen free donuts please". (Probably without the "please").

No. 92055


No. 92057

"I'm a #struggling super hero."

No. 92058

File: 1430516375943.jpg (70.43 KB, 495x656, 1.JPG)

She will only write to you and "love" you if you send her shit.

Haha, yeah. I was shocked to hear her old big booming voice appear when she was all excited over her freebie dvds. DONUTS FUCKIN DONUTS. NOW!!!!!

No. 92061

Jackie's the most depressing depressive I've read on the interwebz

No. 92062

Jackie is a sad, sad person.

No. 92064

Poll: Would you rather be stuck on an island with TFC or Jackie?

No. 92065


I think there'd be more food for me if I was with Jackie, but I'd rather go hungry and opt for TFC. ONLY on the condition I can take a shitload of benzos with me to deal with either.

No. 92067

I feel kind of bad making fun of Jackie. I don't know how self-aware she is.

No. 92068

Bullet to the head pls

No. 92069

No. 92071


You mean because she's special needs?

No. 92072

She comes across as legitimately retarded.

No. 92075

It's one thing to make fun of a girl with autism who stumbles around like an idiot trying to make friends with disordered women. It's completely different to make fun of a retarded person who doesn't have the intelligence to understand what she's doing wrong.

No. 92077

I agree, but it's not making fun of her to note how much of a downer reading her blog puts you in. She's in her 30s and lives with her parents. Somebody should take her to the doctor or at least have a word with her.

No. 92080

How/where? Looking over her blog looks like typical so deep edgy teenage depression. I've seen no text posts actually from her yet.

No. 92082

No. 92084

File: 1430517861482.jpg (100.78 KB, 1009x602, a.JPG)

She's an adult with a teenage mentality. Something's not right, but I'm not sure I'd call her retarded.

No. 92087

Ah shit she's friends with Ash?

No. 92088

Yeah! She's the one in the socialcams with her.

No. 92093

Anorexia has ravaged her. :(

No. 92096

She doesn't seem retaded here

No. 92098

File: 1430518369653.jpg (143.42 KB, 1003x610, a.JPG)

I have no clue what her past has been, but she comes across as more of a wannarexic

No. 92099

File: 1430518440685.jpg (124.99 KB, 1017x610, eyy.JPG)

I wonder if onefixation follows her?

No. 92100


No. 92105

Is Jackie trans? I know that's a really horrible thing to say,but she has a male body structure.

No. 92110

I don't think so. She's just quite masculine, I think. Idk for sure though.

This is her as a toddler. Kind of dressed as a female?

No. 92124

Her shoulders look extremely broad, but idk could just be her body structure.

No. 92126

Jackie reminds me of some chronic anorexics who started as kids and as a result suffer mental effects from the disease and the long-term effects of starvation. And I agree, I think that she's not lolcow fodder because something is clearly wrong and I don't think she can help it.

No. 92132

How is that different than Ash?

No. 92136


Because Ashley's mental illness isn't responsible for her racism or her cruelty to others. That's on her.

No. 92148

No. 92150

She works out so her muscle tone could be down to that? A school friend of mine developed really broad shoulders because she was a swimming fanatic and it gave her a masculine body look.

Naw, Jackie's not a lolcow. She's harmless.

No. 92154

File: 1430523535521.png (10.2 KB, 401x95, comments.png)

Autism intensifies.

No. 92166


These comments are on the same picture on instagram?!

No. 92167

No. 92170

hnnnng…i want the NASA t shirt.

No. 92173


Weird. But all of the sycophants on ED accounts comment with some variation of that comment with a "~*stay strong*~" thrown in.

No. 92178

I know the people who do that are showing their form of support, but I do inwardly scream when I see someone post that. It's like they can't verbalise something more personal.

I'm not being a sycophant but the look on Erika's face since she left the critical unit has changed. She looks less anxious and calmer.

I hope the ones who're finding her inspiring aren't throwing out empty words and are actually doing something to deal with their own problem.

Stay strong, farmers.

No. 92181

I like that stronger_without_ana girl as well.

You know how we've noticed some people who're faking recovery? s_w_a's account is the opposite of theirs. She's actually eating a good balance of nutritional food and also things like Oreo pancakes. Idk, I get a bit mushy when I see people doing well.

No. 92191

Havetorecover is also incredibly inspirational.

No. 92197


I'm one such a person, but you know how hard it is for us sometimes.
After a while you grow addicted to the feelings of an empty stomach and any sensation of it being filled makes you feel physically nauseous.

I only had a mocha and a crepe today but I already feel like I've overeaten, and even then I only ate that after seeing Erika's post, I had planned to consume nothing. That being said I'm not underweight yet so I don't feel like I "really" have a problem. I'm not legitimate.

No. 92198


Target, my friend. Little boys' section.


It's one of my wardrobe staples.

No. 92201

Would you consider speaking/have you spoken to your doctor about it? Maybe now's the time to look into dealing with the way you're feeling before it escalates?

UK anon. No Target. Pretty sure there'll be some on ebay, but that's a good price. Fuck, I'd love to visit NASA…then the gift shop.

No. 92202

Yup, got some on ebay for 7 quid. I'd go for the grey.

No. 92210

We might make fun of you, but we mean well. Don't starve yourself, you really don't want to go down that road.

No. 92214


Oh it's escalated before. I was very anorexic in my teens, then became obese, then merely overweight and now I'm caught in a tide of binging and starving periodically.
It's not that I'm not so young that I don't believe I may one day "grow out of it", I'm only in my 20's, but if you've experienced an ED you should know too that you never really fully recover, at least not mentally, it's always in the back of your mind.
It's probably something I'll have to deal with alone, but I've been to doctors before in the past and they can't help me. I appreciate your concern though.


Been down that road before friend, and returned, and gone back again, and so on and so forth but I'm gonna stop now because this isn't my thread nor my blog, but thank you anyway x

No. 92216

I know that feeling too well.

No. 92217


My weight's yo-yo'd and when I dieted I had a big buzz from losing weight that was addictive, even though I wasn't starving or barfing. I didn't see how gaunt my face looked in photos until someone gave me a wake up call. Even though I've never had an ED I can vaguely understand what you're saying.

We can be bitches here, but nobody deserves a living death like Ashley.

No. 92222


Ahah, yeah the whole looking back part is weird isn't it?

I was actually just looking at old photos close to where I was at my lowest weight and it's weird how I just did not see how thin I was then.
Like I remember when I took the photos, crying over them because of how fat I was convinced I looked, like really sobbing.
I'm looking at them now thinking "Oh shit was I ever actually that small?".

No. 92224

File: 1430532762509.jpg (65.25 KB, 1280x720, black-e29885-rock-shooter-hd-r…)

No. 92227


The only time you think you're thin is looking at old photos from a time when you thought you were fat. Sad.

Did Ashley ever post a video yet?

No. 92228

Not yet, we're still waiting.

No. 92229

I look ghastly in those photos and wanted to throw them away, but I keep them as a reminder. I make sure I never get down to the weight I was at.

No. 92230

I don't have an ed but I know so much how you feel. I'm looking at old photos right now and I could've sworn I was really fat at the time but I've just seen hipbone which I don't think I've ever seen in my entire life? I'm so confused. I don't think human minds are very accurate when processing our actual images.

No. 92233

I wonder if this is how Ashley would feel if she recovered. Surely she must understand how ugly she is.

No. 92234

Sorry, *must not understand.

No. 92245


>surely she must understand how ugly she is

Nope. That's what body dysmorphia is, it makes you legit crazy and warps your reflection in real-time.

Picture related is my leg from when I was like…109lbs at 5'6"? I think.
Anyway, on the left is the actual photograph, but on the right is roughly about close to what I saw whenever I looked down at my legs.
This isn't an exaggeration.

No. 92252


Another one of what I saw vs. what I actually was like at around 115lbs (I think).

idk if this will shed some light for people who've never had to deal with this kind of thing. Sorry if I'm taking over, this is actually kind of therapeutic for me.

No. 92255

No. 92260

Eh. I agree with what one person said here of body dismorphia- that they don't believe their whole body is fat. They just think certain problem areas are bigger than they seem.

No. 92261


Well yeah, it's not that you imagine that you have rolls hanging off and you stuff. You don't really hallucinate in that sense, everything just looks really, really wide, like you've been stretched out, or that wrinkles and folds and stuff when you curl up or whatever are actually massive rolls of fat.

No. 92264

I was fucked up over having "hip dips".

No. 92273


I think hip dips are sexy Anon.

No. 92276

Not sure. She's aware how skinny she is when she posts pics of her putting her fingers around her thigh.

No. 92277

Sexier than being an emaciated skeleton, that's for sure.

No. 92278

Her palm width around a thigh!!!! That's just WHAT???

No. 92281

i've said earlier in this thread, fuller figure is seriously hot.

No. 92283

File: 1430539495048.jpg (190.93 KB, 800x1069, 10.jpg)


Yup, hip dips are just grand :3
I wish I had them, they make for a great ass with the right amount of squats.

No. 92284

ocd causing ed (recovered) and bdd here. The mirror isn't what it seems at all and you hey really strange fixations, you see things that apparently other people can't (or in your mind to polite to tell you).

Weight fixations aren't really what it seems, you will set a goal weight and even if you make target, you don't look thinner so you're convinced is lying. It's a sore process the losing weight so because you look at you ecru free minutes in the mirrors you don't see it, you do however pick up on all got flaws each time you look in the Mirror but you won't stop doing it.

I got obsessed with how ugly I think my belly button is. But that's an odd one, a common knee is noses. The more you look in the mirror the more distorted your mental view of your nose will be, and may appear larger than it seems. Hope that helps a small understanding of bdd. also surgery won't help you'll just find the next thing to hate.

No. 92285


I'm so tired I can't even understand what I wrote. forgive me!

No. 92289

Made perfect sense to me.

No. 92311

btw i think its kinda weird that anon posted photoshopped fat pics of herself in this thread lol

No. 92312

A little.

No. 92314

File: 1430545458886.jpg (490.35 KB, 3104x1746, vomitbottles.jpg)

The things people with EDs do…

No. 92315


Sorry you're right.
I guess I just wanted to shed some light on what body dysmorphia is like for people who've never experienced it. They're deleted now.

No. 92316

File: 1430545579038.jpg (317.02 KB, 1242x2208, image.jpg)

I wonder who else he's doing this to?

No. 92317

2067 other women by the looks of it.

No. 92318

Yay, I'm really glad you blocked him, Erika. :)

No. 92319

Survi.val did too.

No. 92320


claps :D I'm glad you did it. He gives me bad vibes.

No. 92321

I wonder how he's going to react when he realizes he's blocked.

No. 92322

That's great!

No. 92323


She's done the same thing in videos that I'm pretty sure she's deleted. Like, she'd point the camera at her legs for ~5 seconds while talking and seemingly absentmindedly wrapping her fingers around her thighs. shudders I know some people bodycheck compulsively but I don't know anyone who does it while knowingly having an audience. Being able to wrap your fingers around your thighs isn't an accomplishment.

No. 92325


He has more than 2000 other young women to prey on. He'll just find another vulnerable person. I don't think people like him dwell. They just move on to another target.

No. 92329

I guess it can't be helped.

No. 92330

File: 1430547489101.png (4.2 KB, 316x37, urrr.png)

What did it say?

No. 92331


That was probs before he was banned because he can't comment on pictures once banned, right? I'm guessing it's something creepy and manipulative about how he wants to protect her, how no one knows her like he does, how similar they are, etc. It's not hard to guess.

No. 92333

Right above that she mentioned she doesn't know how to DM, so maybe she never saw it?

No. 92334

Anyone speak Korean?

No. 92336


Can you tell us what is at the link first?

No. 92337

Pictures of Ashley.

No. 92338

File: 1430548755451.jpg (92 KB, 500x667, skeletonqueen.jpg)

Is it just me, or is this picture actually kind of cute?

No. 92340


I'm too distracted by the irony of the shirt. But that picture makes me feel sad. I can see why she's so good at attracting patrons to fund her addiction. She looks pathetic and you want to help her.

No. 92348

Does anyone know anything about Ashley's friend here?

No. 92352

A grown woman taking selfies in the toddler's department at target. How pathetic.

No. 92355

I'm pretty sure that's Walmart too lol

No. 92399

wait this is considered FULL figured? wtf??? this is a normal healthy weight imo.

No. 92401

kek where did you find this

No. 92408

That's because you can't see her facial cavities as much because of the lighting. Her face looks a bit fuller here.

No. 92425

May I please ask how she still has hair on her head??

No. 92427

It's a mystery.

J/k, it's a wig.

No. 92429

File: 1430577729116.png (137.53 KB, 1080x474, Screenshot_2015-05-02-10-37-44…)


No. 92434

No. 92447

>just tell me

She doesn't have to justify her actions to anyone, sunshine. Piss off, creepy bleeder lol.

No. 92461


Using a sockpuppet account to contact someone after getting blocked is creepy at best, but more likely stalkerish.
Casually mentioning a ~care package~ is obviously emotional manipulation.


No. 92462

This means he asks for addresses if he sends out "care packages". That's disturbing.

Shouldn't have mentioned care packages, he'll have Ash all over him like a rash.

No. 92506

Block him too

No. 92514



if someone blocked me on something like ig or fb or any place else i'd think - oh well, they had their reason, move on, but NO he wants a written explanation. really??? wtf.

of course, i'd wonder what i might've done to be blocked and if i was being overbearing towards someone i hardly knew i'd realise i had some kind of problem with myself.

ew ick ick no. he makes my skin crawl.

No. 92519

uh if you KNEW the guy yeah then you'd wonder. but if someon random person blocked you that you've never spoken to? whats it matter

No. 92547

It's not just you; it is pretty cute.

No. 92555


You'd think he'd have realized that he's creepy after the kidnapping comment. He has no self-awareness. Or maybe he think people don't realize his schtick.

No. 92562

File: 1430599779549.jpg (23.66 KB, 385x223, kek.JPG)

Possibly an anon farmer?


No. 92574

File: 1430602500794.jpg (33.1 KB, 516x314, abortashley.jpg)

Quick! Ashley needs attention!

No. 92575

lol, god this bitch is so thirsty for attention.

No. 92577

if this even happened (and i doubt it) i find it amusing how she sets it up like its something her mother randomly said and not a result of ashley being a horrible little shit at the moment and her mom snapping

No. 92580

if only her mom HAD aborted her. oh well.

No. 92582

Farmer or annoying autist.

No. 92583

EW. What a total fucking creep. I would be soo weirded out if someone did that to me, damn. Report dat shit E!

No. 92584


That's a shitty thing to say, but I also don't think that Ashley realizes what it is like to have a chronically ill adult child who refuses help.

No. 92587

But she's #hurting, you monsters. Her attempts ay attention seeking never fail to amuse me.

No. 92589

File: 1430604747466.jpg (18.98 KB, 397x245, 12.jpg)


No. 92594


Lol, those are the only options I get? Farmer or autist? Couldn't it just be a concerned follower of Erika's that was able to see onefixation for the creep that he is, as we all did?

No. 92598

No. 92599

Nice one!

He needed to be told. Fucking pervert.

No. 92600

File: 1430607050989.jpg (590.07 KB, 1280x1707, tumblr_nnncomcUnJ1upnbl4o1_128…)

Damage limitation/covering up lies Ashley style:

1. Show part of a letter to "a follower" showing how FUCKING GRATEFUL I am for their gift.

2. Make sure to show the part where she mentions having the cosplay jacket (which we've never seen because it hasn't arrived) is "hidden safely away" from Ma Isaacs.

3. Let lolcow know she doesn't have Netflix and this is why she wants dvds.

4. Emphasize all the shit you're going through.

Ashley, you're a clown.

No. 92602


man, ashley is vile, but her cursive is really nice. Mine looks like a childs scribblings.

No. 92603

Not bad considering she's left handed. Gel pens are best to write with IMO.

We weren't taught cursive script at school. It was all really plain joined up writing and you weren't allowed to experiment with your own style until secondary school at age 11.

No. 92606


So she never got the jacket then.

No. 92608

She says she did and even though she lives in a shoebox she's hidden it away BUT we've never seen an irl pic of the thing.

No. 92617

What does being left handed have to do with it? I'm a leftie and my handwriting is 1000x nicer than my sister's, who is a rightie.

No. 92619

I assumed they meant there's no smudging present. I'm a lefty too, and I have a tendency of leaving ink smudges whenever I write.

No. 92623

It's a special 'lefties pen' I found at Wal mart :-)

No. 92625

Yep, I meant the smudging, not the quality of writing. There used to be a shop in my town that sold stuff for left handers. Things like can openers must be a pain in the ass.

No. 92628

I'm confused. Did you mean to link a photo, or are you Ashley explaining why there's no smudging in your letter?

No. 92630

I was just explaining why there aren't any smudges. The ink is supposed to dry upon contact with paper so that left handed individuals don't have to deal with constant messy pens. Should I use 'A' in the reply field like 'E' does~~~

No. 92631

Fuck, isn't any smudges? ISN'T OR AREN'T AHHHHHH

No. 92632

>Should I use 'A' in the reply field like 'E' does

No, getting the fuck out of here would be ideal. Thanks.

No. 92633

U know how to use tripcodes right? U and E should both use tripcodes k.

No. 92635

&& post ur tripcode on ur tumblr so we know its u

No. 92636

Aren't, lol.

I think it's pretty amusing that they both come here, honestly.

No. 92637

cool the fuck down, yeah? don't talk to people like that, if ashley's here this thread is bad enough already without being an asshole directly to her, too. it's a public site which ANYONE can use so get off whatever high horse you're on.

ashley, if you'd prefer to put 'a' in the reply field, you go ahead. you have really nice handwriting. i feel kind of uncomfortable saying this to you because i know you probably won't respond well if you respond at all but i really hope you get help sometime. i know you and e aren't on good terms but it's making such a positive difference in her life, she's so much happier than she was, and you could be too.

No. 92638

FFs, don't encourage her.

No. 92639

No. 92641

File: 1430615585451.jpg (5.17 KB, 270x187, download.jpg)

No. 92642

wanting someone to show someone else some respect isn't white knighting it's basic human decency but okay.

No. 92644


No. 92645

This is lolcow, cupcake.

No. 92646

No. 92647

…ok are you done now? why don't you head back to tumblr.

No. 92648

Here's an idea, Caleigh: make some friends in real life.

No. 92649

No. 92652

File: 1430616173984.jpg (82.48 KB, 699x407, 1346544870705.jpg)

No. 92653

Cute how Ashley has to have someone to hold her hand when she comes here.

No. 92664

Oooooooh. Yeah, I have that problem with ink and pencils D:

No. 92665

Electric can openers make it easier. The thing that causes me the most strife: scissors.

No. 92671

No. 92679

Go fuck yourself. How dare you even make reference to Erika after all the shit you've done to her. You're just mad because she's well liked and a decent person unlike you.

No. 92681


sigh Come on. Grow up.

You know, the best "revenge" you could pull off would be to get healthy, get a job, and live a normal life. That would be more productive than snarky comments on an anonymous gossip site and malicious phone calls.

No. 92683

I wonder, if I shake you by the shoulders hard enough, would your neck snap?

No. 92684


She's not a good person but that's too far.

No. 92685

Ash could make so much fuckin' ca$$$h if she just fixed herself and then went on the motivational-tour circuit at high schools. So much fucking money in those things. High schools eat that shit up. If I were Ash I'd write to Dr. Phil or Oz or some other pithy tv show host, do a show to get them to pay for some sweet ass treatment, get the weight back, then launch my speaking tour. Then I'd roll around in my money.

No. 92695

holy shit

No. 92698

probably would to be honest, as there isnt enough flesh and muscle to support the weight of her head. she's so fragile that just tripping is likely enough to kill her

No. 92699

You know what else would kill her? Telling the truth.

No. 92700

This is disgusting will you fucking stop replying to yourself making it worse? She's thin, she's weak, WE GET IT. She's also a terrible friend and a user. Let's focus on those things, as we've been doing all along, instead of getting into unnecessary gory shit.

No. 92701

haha not even the same anon that said it, just was answering their question with a reasonably possible answer

No. 92702


I looked up that 'methspider' person and it is so pathetic. I can't believe she is trying to get an ~eating disorder~ on myproana. That site is awful.

There is nothing good about having an eating disorder. I have non-vomiting bulimia, and every second of my day is occupied with thoughts about losing weight and food.

Having an eating disorder does not make you cool or edgy, it just makes your life hell.

No. 92703

We don't need to act like psychos.

No. 92705


These types of comments only feed her victim complex.

And I think it's kind of sad that she's so desperate for attention that she returns to the thread to stir up drama whenever we say nice things about Erika.

No. 92706

Genuine question, what is non-vomiting bulimia?

No. 92707


Different anon but I'm guessing it involves laxatives or compulsive overexercising

No. 92710

Pussy bitch bulimia.

No. 92715

is it when you chew the food but spit it out without swallowing?

No. 92716


No, but I do that as well.

No. 92718


lol what? all bulimia consists of is episodes of binge eating and then compensatory behaviors that follow…

I have no idea why vomiting has become so closely linked with bulimia…

No. 92719

It means shes fat because she doesn't throw up any of the food she eats

No. 92720


is 5'5 and 120 fat? That's where I'm at now, but I'm male….

I want to get down to 115 though

sorry for being OT, but i think i have a similar thing and am meeting with a shrink later in the month

No. 92723

I'm glad you're meeting with a shrink. Don't become an skelebro.

No. 92754

I'm actually kind of glad it's not the same person as tfc.

No. 92789

No. 92790

This is just sad.

No. 92791

File: 1430646051746.png (239.05 KB, 482x359, jdwat.png)

No. 92801

I'm not upset with Ashley…l forgive everyone, but the reality is, I chose to meet her, not because I feel bad, she really intrigued me. She was a different broken I felt empathy for and yet, let go and laugh with her.!what made me go was the hurt. I knew in my heart my compulsions and eating disorder had to stop. Now. I had been pulling the emergency brake for nearly a year, but I wasn't strong enough. I chose to shower her with extravagant gifts, not because I felt bad, it was healing for me in a way to regift/exchange the things my husband's perverted step father had given me…I still shudder. I was so sick, so sick, even when dying I cried for it to stop. Ashley was my friend. I don't believe she used me, I know and knew going into this friendship that she was ill too, and that was my mistake, yet the drive to care for Ashley (I was a parentally abused child), the way I love, I love with passion, be it a stranger who is crying, to the way I give my daughters my all. I just wanted to be the one who didn't walk away. I wanted to recover and show her it was ok, but I couldn't. I felt so sad in Boca. I was a nobody and actually made a friend. I found myself worrying about her in the way a
Mother should. I made mistakes, but I just wanted to give her the happiness of her corroded childhood every child should know. Her mom did seem really irritated/unhappy about us being friends..I'll never know why. We never talked about that stuff in person. I had to let go to protect myself. I finally felt ashamed that I was so ill. I never saw it, but I was. I like hot baths with the shower on cool, too hot and too cold, both extremes seem to meet in a magnificent sigh. By the sickness in my head, logically I knew I was sick, the pestilence had me convinced to lock the doors, I could only see through my tiny peephole. Obscured by fear, I ignored my imminent illness to prevent the others from panicking.

I wrote in my touch, so, yes, this is me. Ashley taught me a thing or two I hold deeply. Fear is the only binding issue. I had to walk away, it hurt, but I had to. I wanted to live, I had a reason to. I had many.mi had only just begun to see that I had any value. it killed me to see her so frail. I always saw the old Ashley, I projected myself as a little girl onto her, I felt like I wasn't alone. I hope she can see me recover and not laugh. I want her to know that it is possible, even without children, I really needed to try my hardest and let go, two extremes, a magnificent light. I am that little girl, sad and alone. I need to help myself. I have love, so much love, I refused to not care. ? I have forgiven this period of my life and walked away only holding myself in a way, like a triumphant exit from smoke strewn firey building. Just barely there, that last few steps before I collapsed made my madness into strength. I wish for her the same.

No. 92805


My Pro Ana isn't actually a bad site, it just has an old, dumb name from a different era.

Nobody on that site is actually pro-eating disorder, although admittedly there will undoubtedly be a couple of crazies already been warped through starvation.

I'm a member, have been for years and it's absolutely wonderful in terms of support and recovery, especially when you have nobody to talk to about your problems in real life.

No. 92806

I just followed you on IG Erika. You have an amazing spirit. I've had to cut some people I care for out of my life to protect myself as well, so I can empathize with you.

No. 92808

True forgiveness for others and all parts of yourself can only lead to happiness. It is one of the hardest things to do, but exactly the right one. The way you speak about it makes it seem like you have actually put that into effect. That alone shows such strength of character.

No. 92814

I understand this in my own way. My own mental illnesses led to me volunteering for the local branch of a national mental health charity. When I'd recovered from the most debilitating aspect of one of these illnesses, I wanted to tell people there IS light at the end of the tunnel and you CAN conquer your fears.

Unfortunately, I found being surrounded by people who had a similar mindset to the one I'd had at my sickest too difficult to deal with. It brought back too many memories of the old feelings and even YES triggered some of my old habits.

I left for self preservation reasons. Even though it would've been an amazing experience to have witnessed their recovery down the line, I just couldn't for my own sake.

Sometimes you have to think of yourself over others and that's not selfish.

/end of ~personal blog~ but although our experiences are different, I understand and I really do think you needed to break away.

No. 92838

File: 1430667612598.png (114.88 KB, 477x675, Screenshot_2015-05-03-17-35-26…)

No. 92839

File: 1430667649156.png (365.06 KB, 476x598, Screenshot_2015-05-03-17-35-05…)

No. 92840

holy shit

No. 92841


Thanks for posting.

For someone poor, she shops a lot.

Oh and look, she's "dyed her hair" again.

No. 92842

File: 1430668064555.jpg (33.08 KB, 800x530, Mummy.jpg)

No. 92844

shes soooooooo yellow! is her liver functioning like, at all?

No. 92845

I feel terrible for the people who have to see this girl in public, it must be very shocking and upsetting, though I'm sure she is just craving whatever attention she gets. As far as going out like this, is there a chance someone is able to make a call or something for the state that she is in?

No. 92846


Is it weird that if you just spray painted that mummy's skin a more human skin tone it really would look like Ash?

No. 92847

File: 1430668671422.png (313.45 KB, 322x485, whatisshethinking.PNG)

What do you think she's thinking?

No. 92848

That's a fact, innit.

She's not got long left. She looks worse every week.

You can see that woman looking at her in the store. Of course she's attention seeking with a blue wig.

Lol this just popped up >>92847 while typing. They'll be shocked tbh. Or wonder if there's filming for something going on and she's a prop.

No. 92849

Did she heave herself out of her wheelchair to take this, because that would extra weird for people watching.

No. 92851

File: 1430669705321.jpg (27.85 KB, 360x230, Kevin-Carter-Child-Vulture-Sud…)

Everyone following her are waiting for her death. Not even in a nasty way, but they must be expecting her to croak it really soon.

No. 92852

i feel really strange looking at pictures of her. it's mind blowing to me that self-preservation wouldn't set in at SOME point. it's terrifying.

No. 92853

They way you talk about her is disgusting

No. 92854

You'd think it would. Even looking at her makes me want to eat.

Yes. That's because she's disgusting.

No. 92855

Others call it honesty.

No. 92857

And you're not? Your inner spirit putting this young woman down because of her outward appearance is a judgement you don't have the right to have.YOU are disgusting.

No. 92858


we're not even talking about her outward appearance as being the disgusting thing about her. the fact is she looks like she's close to death and she'd upset people who saw her in real life.

i have the right to judge, fuck off with your juvenile philosophy and haul that ass back to tumblr. bye bye.

No. 92861

File: 1430672879671.jpg (12.13 KB, 234x216, download.jpg)

~inner spirit~

No. 92877

File: 1430675413187.jpg (26.59 KB, 492x346, 7.JPG)

Answer: The kind of idiot who sees a therapy session as a step towards recovery and is grateful therapy is available to them.

No. 92878

Yeah really, what the shit?
I'm doing physical therapy nearly every day a week for a variety of reasons, and I'm always excited to go, because I'm extremely interested in working to get back to being in the best health I can be.
Like. The point of any kind of therapy is to be actively engaged in the process so that you're really putting yourself into what you're doing to your full extent.
The fact that Ashley doesn't realise that makes me seriously doubt that she's actually excited lol.
Unless she just likes the attention the therapist gives her.
That is, if she was even seeing a therapist.
Which she isn't.

No. 92881

I don't get what she's saying here. Does she mean only idiots and not her get excited for therapy, or she's excited for therapy?

Either way, therapy's good. You should get some, Ash. In reality, not make believe.

No. 92883

The kind who seek success and is worthy enough to not put others down for their sake. Cunt.

No. 92884

I HATE those "one a scale of 1-10 how [insert emotion] are you feeling right now charts. That's the only part I hate. After months waiting to get a therapist, it's a joyous occasion to actually get an appointment. I'm not even being sarcastic.

No. 92887

Back to Erika for a sec, I like that nude shade lipstick she's wearing. I've never found one that doesn't look really drying or too glossy my hair sticks to it.

No. 92888

File: 1430677022415.jpg (71.9 KB, 537x399, 8587666.jpg)

it's a conscious decision to put herself online like that.
if she can't handle people's judgements and opinions she should stay the fuck off the internet. and i agree with the anons here that the content she puts out (her pics/what she says/etc.) IS disgusting.

No. 92889

that woman is on the phone too, she's probably telling whoever shes talking to about the spooky skeleton in front of her. even though the picture is blurry you can still see the discomfort in that womans face

No. 92890

Ashley gets off to attention. If she didn't she wouldn't post here whenever she's not the focus of conversation. Everything she does or says is for a reaction.

If people didn't make comments about her, she'd have nothing. That's the tragic truth. Even more tragic is that if she bothered to opt for recovery she'd have nothing but positive attention and be helping others as well. But she won't.

No. 92893

Fuck APS. How is she not committed yet? She and her mom need to both separate and heal. There is some serious codependency going on there.

No. 92900

File: 1430679367657.jpg (40.17 KB, 509x515, 00.JPG)

You're right about the codependency.

Earlier, when Erika said she got the impression Ashley's mum didn't like her being with Ash, I was wondering if she was jealous that Ashley had a friend other than her? I wonder what she's like with anyone else that visits Ash?

I don't think her mum's a bad person, but both have issues (one more than the other), and I doubt she's a "monster". Would they both be friends on facebook if Ash truly hated her? Would she bother to comment on her mum's pics?

Of course Ash is so self-centred she can't see the ~struggles~ Ma Isaacs has experienced/is experiencing. Definitely need seperation. Secretly Ashley must really fear that.

No. 92902


>Earlier, when Erika said she got the impression Ashley's mum didn't like her being with Ash, I was wondering if she was jealous that Ashley had a friend other than her?

I seriously doubt that.

Her mother was probably upset that when Ashley finally has a friend, it was someone who was extremely, dangerously underweight.

Her mother didn't know that Erika was sincerely interested in recovery, she probably just saw a very sick girl, years older than her daughter but still looking on the brink of death, perhaps trying to prey on her or further her illness.

I mean, fucking hell. If you have a daughter with very unhealthy mental patterns with a reputation for surrounding herself with others with the same issues to validate her own issues, why would you enable that kind of relationship?

Think back to that segment on Dr Phil that was posted a while ago with the mother, completely beaten down, just surrendering to her daughter's psychotic urges in a last ditch effort to protect her own physical and mental wellbeing.

To me, this is extremely obvious. Ashley's mother is nothing but a figure of pity to me.

No. 92906

That did cross my mind, but then I thought I'd be beaten down with the ASHLEY'S MOM HAS AN ED TOO - THEY COMPETE!!! argument.

That's Ashley's brainwashing for you, I was too hesitant to state the obvious.

Same with her mum driving her to get 24 donuts. In a way that's enabling, but we know what a whiny bitch Ashley is and for some peace I probably would've given in to her pestering as well.

It's difficult to speculate when we only hear one side of the story (Ashley's), but when Ash eventually dies (brutal honesty there - she won't last long), I hope that after the grief her mum finds some peace in her life.

No. 92911

You don't know why she went for donuts, and you never will. Every single person on here SPECULATES. And ASSUMES. You'll never actually KNOW.

No. 92912



That shit gets me. I don't think people here realise the extent to which stress effects the body. It can cause extreme weight loss, aging, heart issues, even infertility. I've seen it happen with my own mother.

I'm ashamed to admit that I've been a bullying child myself, although not nearly to the extent of Ashley, and I was absolutely horrified when I finally realised what I'd been doing. But shit, I'm 19. Ashley's in her mid-twenties. I don't think she even has the cognitive capability to recognise her faults any more, especially when she seems to be deliberately hurting her mother.

No. 92913

10/10 parody.

>inb4 she posts a video of a sculpture she made that consists entirely of doughnuts glued together to form a shrine to skellingtons

No. 92915

I once again will state that you will never know the truth until the videos are made. Everything that has been stated on lolcow by others is wrong.

No. 92916

Ashley, all you have to do is make a video or post on tumblr the real reason. I mean, if it means that much to you that the truth gets out there, then why not just SAY it? I mean, how bad can the truth be? You're always like "oooh you DON'T KNOW THE TRUTH". Okay, so what is the truth? Why is it such a secret?

Oh, is it because the truth is that the anons are dead-on correct that you puked up the donuts and wasted more of your mom's money?

I mean seriously, they are fucking donuts. How big of a secret could the real reason possibly be?

No. 92917

Wait though. You forgot these ^_^

Nobody really gives a fuck about the videos. Lies, lies and more lies. Zzzzzz/

No. 92919

>I mean seriously, they are fucking donuts. How big of a secret could the real reason possibly be?

Dude, she's coating them with ~professional glitter glue~ for her store!!!

No. 92921

because getting rid of a binge with vomiting is 30 minutes, or it's 15 hours of running, so basically ineffective.

No. 92923

What the actual shit
I agree that there is no way Ashley's mother can be that much of a monster if they're friends on facebook and comment on each other's stuff.

My own mother is horrible, and you know what? I haven't spoken to her in eight years. Even if I had, I would not have her on my Facebook, and I certainly wouldn't comment on her posts.

No. 92926

I'm not interested in hearing Ashley's version of the truth. The objective truth is that she is near-death and lives with her mom who cannot or will not get the help her daughter needs.

No. 92928

but why her mom doesn't do anything? my mom would never let me go this far, and she is one of the reasons I don't want to. Her mother might be not a monster, but she is responsible for her daughter's condition.

No. 92933

For all we know, she might have tried and failed. There's no way I believe she's let her get into this condition without doing something.

No. 92935

Because Ashley is an adult and therefore her mother cant force her. You cannot be responsible for another's choices. There is evidence that Ashley was put into hospitals as a teen which would have been her mother's doing.

No. 92964

This made me cry. I had no idea I looked sick. I thought my face looked healthy enough that people would just think I was small. This type of brutal honesty needs to be spoken. Powdering things up does nothing but hinder progress. "Your room isn't messy!" …ten years later, married, "I should have told him the messes bothered me." This is totally different than "shaming"- shaming would be "man, that girls got frizzy hair, I should go tell her and laugh!" Or, a girl with frizzy hair is fumbling around looking at hair products and you say," My mom has really tight curls, she loves ____, but I think she's really lucky, tight curls are gorgeous! Both hypotheticals on perception and attitudes. I can usually tell another introvert, I usually just give a quick smile to acknowledge empathy while awkwardly looking at something and then walking quickly away out of embarrassment.

No. 92966

File: 1430691790757.png (81.43 KB, 736x580, df.png)

No. 92972

You remind me so much of myself! Some more honesty: I was just looking at your most recent photos vs ones you posted about a month ago, and it's seriously amazing how your face is filling in, and you really do have a healthier "glow" about you. You are seriously amazing, keep it up. <3


Oh lord. Is this a new tumblr account?

No. 92975


That is why people were confused by the contouring. You looked very sick and the contouring was just highlighting it. As you get better, looking at old pictures. will become more difficult. Just focus on future and the progress you're making :)

No. 92979

"Safety of your pathetic bubble." Oh, that's fucking rich coming from a 20something cunt knuckle whose only social interaction is teenage wannarexics, begging for Amazon presents, and going to Krispy Kreme and Whole Foods for binge food.

No. 92980


The lolcow thread is the best thing to ever happen to her.


This is exactly the response she wants. It means she gets more attention.

No. 92982

And as if "videos" will "tell the truth." Ashley, suck a fucking tailpipe. You've spun so many versions of "the truth" over the years that YOU don't even know what it is anymore. You literally don't even know what set of your own lies to believe.

Typical Ashley Isaacs bullshit cycle (from personal experience):

- saccharine sweetness/manipulation to get attention/presents
- turn into total cunt once it's discovered she's yet again just using people
- when called out, play victim and give "her side" or "the truth"
- repeat

As for why she hides presents that aren't giftcards? Little missy was getting 30-40something year old neckbeards to mail her shit when she was underage and flashing her twat on stickam. Sometimes she lucks out and UPS doesn't come until after Rebecca leaves for work, but when she's not so lucky, well.

Since she can't get attention for being a hobag anymore, it's all about the poor frail starving trashley.

No. 92983

She DID try, more than once. Much like Michelle (shmegeh)'s mom did. And like shmegeh's mom, Rebecca is broke as fuck. Hence the move to the shoebox apartment.

No. 92985

I was cheap and bought the stupid jelly phone cases and they legit melted into my speakers and thus do not work now. If u wants Broken phone but her crap cases today!

No. 92992

Where did you get the info about shmegeh's mom? I always wondered what was up with her family…

No. 92993


How woould you know that? Were you hacking her e-mail back then or were you one of the neckbeards?

No. 92994

Neither. Just someone who was stupid enough to think I was a valued friend for a while.

No. 92996

Are you a dude, or..? Just trying to figure out her choices. It's mainly been girls close to her age.

No. 92997


What was the turning point?

No. 92998

No. Not like it would matter what I am considering people like her are opportunists who don't even make distinctions between victims.

There were a few things, really, but the main ones? Without getting into blatant specifics since she'll figure out who I am, and either yet again deny our existence in each other's lives or partially/fully dox me:

- For someone who claims to be supportive of others' recovery, she's seriously anything but. Make no mistake that Trashley is very very VERY pro-ana and has been the 2-3 years I've known her.

She'll follow/comment on recovery blogs and Instas basically to encourage them to 'get fat.' Everything is a fucking competition to Trashley. If these (mostly) girls get "fat," then in her eyes she's "winning." More than once she referred to people who chose to recover from their eating disorders as "sellouts."

- When I chose to give my 100% to recovery she instantly went from saccharine sweet to passive-aggressive bitch who would make the worst comments and basically try to undermine my recovery and my decision to get fucking healthy. I don't know if this is entirely her bullshit "competition" mentality or if she's just really bitter she has zero resolve to put herself into new/vulnerable/HEALTHY territory, or…what.

- I'm too broke to shower her with presents all the fucking time. In fact, I never sent her a damn thing (thank god). I live on a ridiculously fixed income and barely have money for a cup of coffee at Starbucks once a month, let alone buy a 24 year old woman dvd's and plastic toys.

- The "black Twitter" post that I've seen here isn't the only time she's been racist. She was markedly more rude to me when I disclosed that I'm not white (I'm white-passing). A few conversations involved her bitching about illegal immigrants being "welfare queens."

I can't say I went through the exact same situation with Ashley as Erika did, but there are more than a few similarities. We were both sick and just looking for someone to commiserate with, and instead ended up with someone who was more parasitic than symbiotic. I used to be a lot more angry about the whole situation than I am (and I admit I still am a little), but well…sigh I don't know. Without getting "personal journal" I'm just focusing on my mental/physical health before everyone else's, or trying to.

No. 92999

What happens to the gifts that Becca finds?

No. 93000

ashley slinging shit at "welfare queens"


No. 93001


I'm beginning to think Ash likes this thread since she gets to look like a victim, and attract sympathy/more targets. What do you think?

No. 93002

I know she used to at least do gift returns on the Amazon ones if the gift/return receipt was in there, or just Goodwill them, but I'm not sure now.

Yeah, that was just… well.

Oh abso-fucking-lutely. I'm ambivalent about anything to do with her in general cos it's like, on one hand I REALLY hate her using even more people for her ill-gotten gains, but then it's like…this is just the kind of shit that she uses to play victim and suck them in.

No. 93003

I think she lost all her friends over this.

No. 93004

Ashley slinging shit at non-whites when she is, I gather, of Jewish origin.

No. 93005


Funny, because immigrants, especially undocumented immigrants, are the hardest working people I know. And Ash has never had a job. Hmm…

No. 93006


Her grandma on her dad's side is Latina, I believe

No. 93008


The names Isaacs and Rebecca make me think she's Jewish, but I can see some Latina in her dad from that photo. Dark hair, dark eyes.

This is true. Hard work at shitty jobs for low pay.

No. 93010

Oh, and Erika. Your face really is looking healthier. You've got colour to your cheeks now, and that's not powder because you're not wearing any in the pic. The energy you're feeling must be worth it, right? Please remember that if things get tough. It's worth it.

No. 93012

I wish this post could be stickied to the top of the page.

No. 93013

ashley, i really doubt it would make a difference if people knew your warped version of the TRUTH… so you can stop constantly baiting the thread about our IGNORANCE and SPECULATION and what REALLY HAPPENED.

No. 93014

>Not being excited for therapy.

My depression treatment is one of the highlights of my week. It's like the days melt away until I'm sitting , talking to my doctor and feeling like they give a shit.

No. 93018

i have a genuine question that's kind of off topic. are fat people who use the word fat as a celebratory description of themselves offended by people with eds?

No. 93021

I never thought about that. There must be "fat pride" forums. Maybe google and see if they comment on EDs.

I do believe that a large amount of people who are unhealthily large use the pride thing as a mask and in reality would prefer not to be. My only source for this info is overweight women who've confided in me that it's a pretense they prefer to be large.

No. 93022

That's binge-eating disorder. This person binges and purges in ways other than vomiting (pooping, exercising).

No. 93023

On tumblr, yes. They get absolutely pissy over people with ED's. I never see any advocating for trying to help people with ED's get better.
They also tend to think there's a skinny "privilege" and that skinny shaming doesn't exist. Which, for a slender person, it doesn't but when you have legit anorexia/underweight issues and people can see your ribs and shit, you will get a lot of rude remarks and shit. But of course fatties can only focus on themselves.

No. 93024

When I was just starting recovery and was still very thin I had some lady sneer at me "how can you even leave the HOUSE looking like…THAT?"

I was like "because my cats need food and litter, ya sloppy twat."

No. 93025

Do you get people saying outright, "Ooh, you're skinny?" because that's so rude. I bet they don't say to an overweight person, "Ooh, you're fat". Buying clothes in my size is a nightmare. I'm slim and short, so "normal" clothes are all wrong - long arms, length too long etc. I used to look in the childrens department for skirts but they always had stupid sequin butterflies or some shit like that sewn on the ass.

There're stores that cater for plus size, but nothing for the more petite.

No. 93026

Yeah. Cunts.

No. 93027

Wait though, I'll add that if there IS a petite department in a store the item is a higher price. Less material, but costs more WHUT?

No. 93028

BED people don't engage in compensatory behaviors.

No. 93029

What do you think the deal is with theforestcat? Willfully ignorant or doesn't know Ashley well enough?

No. 93031

Because petite sizes (with a smaller inseam in pants and a shorter sleeve length) aren't mass-produced

No. 93032

I did. I still find myself buying/wearing clothes a few sizes too big even though I'm weight restored.

Also fuck buying clothes, I've got the opposite problem in that even most "talls" are still too short in the arms/legs/torso.

No. 93033

I think it's honestly a bit of both. I'll admit at first when I heard negative shit about her I didn't want to hear/believe it but well, then I saw it for myself and heard a few things out of that dried up thing she calls a mouth, and….

I'm not sure what TheForestCat hopes to gain with her asskissery and white knighting. Ashley has zero interest in giving anything of herself, emotionally/physically/financially/etc, so.

No. 93034

File: 1430702481701.jpg (39.27 KB, 615x297, 3.JPG)

My friend's 6ft 1in and has that problem. When she buys a jacket she has to make an extension part for the sleeves because otherwise they stop halfway down her forearm.

Sucks not to a shop mannequin. (Not really).

Other people are commenting on Ash's rapid decline.

No. 93035

Not that person, but yeah, people actually do that kind of shit.
People stare at me when I go places, and I overhear comments like 'she's so tiny!' and 'how is she so small!'
I mean, fucking shit, it makes it really difficult to go and get that bit of food I was just about to order when my disordered mental patterns constantly get their twisted reward.

No. 93036

There's a few places (Long Tall Sally, Old Navy, Alloy Apparel) that I sign up for their emails and when there's sales, I go for it. I'm the same height as your friend so hopefully that helps her.

No. 93037

I'll pass that on, thanks. It'll make a change from the men's department sweaters she usually buys.

No. 93038

I know. I was responding to poster who was asking if the person who is "non-vomiting bulimia" is fat. I'm explaining that the poster is probably thinking of BED, rather than the non-vomiting bulimia, which is bulimia with alternate compensatory behavior.

No. 93039


T, Ashley says her mom is eating disordered and they compete. Mom seems like more of a crash dieter than disordered. Thoughts?

No. 93040

File: 1430703329397.png (107.4 KB, 275x245, 7l20R9.png)

No. 93041

Her mom is definitely fucked up, but nowhere near the "evil monster" Ashley has romantically painted her to be. Remember, Ashley either idolizes someone, hates them with a passion, or hasn't met them yet. There's no in between.

Ash has a very love hate relationship with her mom, depending on when her mom tells her "no," if that makes any sense. I think it'd be hard NOT to have some sort of food hangups having to deal with Ashley, but as for a full blown eating disorder….I'm inclined to say no?

Rebecca's flat out tired, when it all comes down to it. Adult Protective services really won't do shit - it's harder than FUCK to get a legal adult involuntarily committed or have them declared a "vulnerable adult." And if Ashley is not actively trying to kill herself or someone else, a 5150/Baker Act hold is another nope.

After the Hamtarochan fiasco, there's only so much that state insurance/medicaid and private insurance will cover for mental healthcare. Ash's dad also wasn't a big fan of paying child support on time/in full and is a fucking mess himself so it's pretty much been Rebecca. Hence the move into the teeny apartment.

As for the Target and Cheesecake Factory and other outings, Rebecca is just so fucking desperate to have SOME sort of normalcy in her life and relationship with Ash, but she knows it'll never happen.

Rebecca is more or less just waiting for Ashley to die.

No. 93042

Whenever I see a picture of her mom I always think her eyes look pretty sad.

No. 93044

You'd be sad too if you pulled double shifts as a waitress and came home to a manipulative ingrate.

No. 93045

Obviously. I just mean it's so obvious that what Ashley says about her isn't that close to the truth. There's what you said, which isn't wrong, but there's also the fact that she has one daughter and she's been watching her slowly starve herself to death for years. IDK I feel for Rebecca, it has to be heartbreaking and exhausting.

No. 93047

fuck. i want to befriend her mom now (without having to come into contact with Ashley). take her to watch a film or something.

No. 93048

She sounds like an ultra-edgy 12 year old.

No. 93049

I figured it was something along these lines. Thanks for typing all this stuff out.

No. 93050

Hardly anyone posts likes or comments on her posts anymore.

No. 93051

If anyone's being abused in that apartment, it's Rebecca. There's the emotional manipulation, and I can definitely tell you she says some SUPER fucking disgusting shit to her mom. She's thrown things at her too (or well, tried to, I mean Ash is currently hovering between 40-45 pounds so it's kinda…."eh" and a half flail of the arm).

In before she comes in here caterwauling, denying everything/calling us all haters and liars and screeching about "the truth" yet again…

No. 93052

You're very welcome. I'm sorry if I was a bit scatterbrained/disjointed at all. I just really really really wish her manipulation and abuse would stop. Unfortunately, I don't think it will until she finally passes away. And then I'll feel even worse for Rebecca because there is literally no money to bury what's left of Ashley, and even with donating a corpse to science you often have to pay to transfer it to the accepting facility.

No. 93053

Yeah, Twatwaffle. This isn't THE TRUTH. You haven't posted videos saying it so therefore it isn't the truth. Just you wait for the truth!!!!11

Even those videos where she's screeching around in her apartment circa 2007 piss me off. She was way too annoying and boisterous. Now it'll be just annoying and screeching.

There's no way on earth I could've dealt with Ashley. No way. Rebecca's a stronger person than I am. Sounds cunty, but I would've had to have her removed from the apartment some way.

No. 93054

I'd donate to her mom if there were some arrangement for it I feel so bad for her now.

No. 93055

Pretty sure her followers would come in handy. Jesus, even I'd give her a bit of cash.

No. 93056

Isn't her Instagram swarming with disordered teens though?

No. 93057

True. MANY.

No. 93058

This is so upsetting though. Like, that really put it into perspective - thinking of the practicalities of her death makes it obvious how inevitable it is. And inb4 white knight, I'm not - I just think it's really sad that this girl has lived what, 24? 25? years and never been much other than a manipulating source of pain for other people. Her death will be a financial burden on her family but otherwise, probably a slight relief. Everyone's life and death should mean more. I always thought most people touched others positively too, no matter how bad, but the more that comes out about her on this site, the less likely it seems that she made anyone's days a bit brighter. Or if she did, it was brief, and then she turned around and made them miserable in the end.

No. 93059

I don't think that sounds cunty or malicious. Ashley knows full well the mental/physical fatigue she puts Rebecca through and fucking gets off on it. She considers it "revenge" for Rebecca cutting off her whole "show my tits and bits on Stickam for presents," as was her suicide attempt after she was caught (which was a whole 'notha episode, hooboy.)

The Amazon wishlist is another "fuck you, Mom" endeavour as well, goes without saying. Anytime she begs for shit, I guaran-fucking-tee you that Rebecca told her "no" about something, whether it's another Target trip, a ride to Whole Foods, "will you leave me pizza money while you're at work," etc.

No. 93061

Woah. I didn't think she knew about the camwhoring.

No. 93062

We all know Ashley has no interest in recovering from her eating disorder or her personality disorder. ZERO. Zilch.

We all know she abuses and manipulates anyone in her periphery, if not currently, then eventually. Everyone is faceless to Ashley. There are no lovers or friends, just sources of narcissistic supply. Presents. Food.

She's been given second, third, fourth, fifth, fucking fiftieth chances. Every time "THE TROOOOOOOOOOOTH!!!!111one"

The only truth is there is no good in Ashley. No empathy for care about anyone but herself. She's added nothing of value to the world other than a cautionary tale.

No. 93063

I'm seeing that now if I hadn't before, honestly. I was so angry toward/about her before but the more it becomes apparent that nobody has any reason to care about her impending death, the more I finally understand that she's wasted her life. And like, it's more of a kick in the balls when you think that she COULD get help. She's in such a fucking bad place but she COULD GET HELP but she won't. That's the worst of it. She could turn her whole life around but she won't. She'll die, Rebecca will have to fork out in one way or another, and that's it.

No. 93065

Her mom is beautiful, despite the hell she lives in.

No. 93066

Twatwaffle is a liar and you all are eating at her fingertips. Lolcow, you're more pathetic than I thought.

No. 93067

dun dun dun! Commence Pokemon battle theme.

No. 93068

lol ok ashley. shouldn't you be busy posting triggering comments on the instagrams of vulnerable girls in recovery or something?

No. 93069

serious q: are you aware of your personality disorder? Most people I know who have one can't see it.

No. 93070

When lolcow gives a fuck what you think, we'll let you know. Don't hold your breath. On second thoughts - DO.

No. 93071

Yeah like… I honestly don't hate Ashley (or anyone for that matter, no matter how horrid they were to me). But after the shit she put me and so many other so-called friends through, I just don't care about her or see any point in investing emotion towards her. Just disappointment and sadness that you mentioned.

And I hate beating a dead horse/bringing her back in but this shit is why I am so fucking goddamn proud of Erika. I know firsthand how humbling it is to swallow your pride and put yourself into new and vulnerable territory, ask for help, and try your damnedest to recover. It's scary as fuck but it's absolutely been worth it.

Ashley is fucking furious and bitter as hell that she will NEVER know that joy. It's even sadder when you think that it COULD be hers if she pulled her head out of the rusted erector set that is her non-ass.

But the anorexia is all Ashley has. She's not particularly intelligent or bright, her personality is shit despite her charismatic manipulation, her looks are definitely long gone, she has no actual life skills or anything that would warrant giving her even a menial, mediocre job…

I mean if I were here I'd delete the fucking wishlists, stop begging for presents, and just fucking apologize and log off the internet. Have one last post/video last hurrah being full on honest about what a physical and mental mess she is (keyword HONEST), and just go. I mean if anything, Ashley could at least prevent even one person from ending up the fucking trainwreck piece of shit she is.

but we know that won't happen.

No. 93072

Is there any way for us to just talk to Rebecca? Maybe it's intruding but I feel so bad.

No. 93073

>charismatic manipulation

COUGH psychopath COUGH

No. 93074


No. 93075

I don't think that anyone can say to her anything she hasn't heard from her friends and family. There's some co-dependency there and she might not welcome your input.

No. 93076

I just hate how she seeks out vulnerable people and milks them. Scamcow.

No. 93077


I wouldn't. At least now until Ashley's finally dead. I absolutely intend on offering Rebecca help with final arrangements (if she'll accept) since there's no way in fucking hell I'd ever give her daughter a dime.

Like the wishlist shit…that's like giving a chronic alcoholic a Margaritaville or a crackhead a fancy pipe and lighter.

No. 93079

True, I just wish we could rid her of Ashley. I'm sure she could potentially have problems of her own but I applaud her for not leaving that piece of shit out on the streets.

No. 93081

Makes me understand why she works so much.

No. 93082

I'd suggest smothering her with a pillow while she's sleeping.

No. 93084

It's also why Ashley is so derogatory about her mother spending any time alone out of the house other than work (ex. claiming Rebecca is out getting "shitfaced" and "whoring it up with random men"). The poor woman literally has NO social or romantic life thanks to the 40 pound parasite screaming and rotting in her living room.

No. 93085

For sure. I wouldn't want to be home alone with her all day. I don't understand how she can have no remorse towards her mother. I remember being a bad teenager, pissing my mom off, making her cry all the time and shit. I feel so bad for doing that to her. Ashley's been putting her mother through hell for years now. Like wtf

No. 93086

Because she's mentally a 12 year old.

No. 93087

Agreed. Fuck, this is personal story time for sure but my mother used to be like ASHLEY and I still feel terrible for hating her for her behavior when I was a teenager. Luckily she did get help and is a great person now but I will never forgive myself for being a cunt to her even while she was insufferable and it just makes me kind of intolerable towards people who aren't patient to their moms.

No. 93088

That's why I think it's seriously a bad idea to try to contact her while Ashley is still alive, especially right now. Ashley is extremely pissed off that her gravy train of victims to buy her presents and food is drying up, and any time she doesn't get her way in any form, she takes it out on Rebecca. Rebecca's the only familiar person she has physical/in person contact with (there IS no therapist and hasn't been one in at least a year).

I really don't want to see Rebecca worn out more than she already is. The post-hamtarochan fallout nearly ruined her as is.

No. 93089

Would you be able to tell us more details on the hamtarochan thing? Just curious if there's anything else that we don't already know.

No. 93090

Does her mom know about the thread and the current wish list? I'm guessing no on the former and yes on the latter?

No. 93092

I reaaaaaaaaaaally am averse to doing so considering how fucking nutter Ashley is and how she takes it out on her mom especially.

I'll just leave it at there being a lot of very inappropriate sexual activity by Ashley and her handing out her contact info to much older men.

I don't know. She clearly knows her daughter is getting presents from 'friends' but beyond that? shrugs But like seriously I do NOT know or think informing her is a good idea, or how to even go about addressing that with Rebecca without it being a huge fucking mess.

No. 93093

Like you really gotta bear in mind the last time Rebecca found out her daughter was getting presents from strangers and handing out her address, Ashley tried to kill herself and was in hospital for months while Rebecca came close to a complete nervous breakdown and is still financially fucked 7 years later. So.

No. 93095

No, I agree. Her mom doesn't need drama from anons on lolcow.

No. 93096

I understand. Thank you for some insight though, I appreciate what you have told and what you are willing to share.

No. 93097

When Ashley told you all this, what was she like? As in, was she matter of fact and I don't care, or did she have any guilt?

No. I'll stay away for sure.

No. 93099

She spun it as a lot of "poor me" and essentially blamed it on her parents divorcing. Like she really alternates a lot between whether she hates her mom or her dad more.

I don't know what if any contact she has with her dad nowadays, she acts like he "walked out" but well considering how she idolizes and discards and repeats who really fucking knows other than her.

No. 93102

Suspected such. Thought there might've been a teeny tiny shred of guilt in her somewhere, but…

What an asshole.

No. 93104

I am 1000% convinced that Ashley is incapable of any sort of remorse or empathy. Hell, look at how she either idolizes or absolutely villainizes people based on whether or not they enable her. "You don't have anything to give me? WELL THEN FUCK YOU I HOPE YOU DIE YOU'RE A LIAR RARARARARAR"

I really fucking wish she'd quit with the constant scheming and attempts to distract people from her most recent bouts of bullshit. The fucking cycle is getting old and she needs to jump off of it.

Ashley's so desperate for validation and approval, fuck, she could call 911, request an ambulance to the nearest ER with an inpatient psych ward, and take it from there. But nah. The food's not as good and the gift shop selection is shit.

No. 93108

Yeah, that is splitting; a classic BPD behavior.

I'm surprised her mom hang just called the ambulance herself. She must feel pretty stuck. Or maybe she uses SSI money to help with rent.

No. 93109

She kind of can't. Again, if Ashley isn't actively trying to hurt or kill herself or someone else, hands are tied. It's all up to the blue haired cheeto herself to get help but we know she won't.

No. 93112

If she took her to the ER they'd def refer her to psych based on her appearance.

No. 93113

Would it do any good if she was reported for making that phone call to Erika?

No. 93114

(yeah, i know she wouldn't get involved)

No. 93116

Even then making a hold stick past 72 hours is a BITCH even with someone as sick as Ashley.

Doubt it since it's just harassment and again Erika would likely not want to get involved. I mean if Ashley called saying "I'm going to kill you" that'd be a very different story.

No. 93117

Erika is the only person who can file a report

No. 93119

Ah well. It'll be over soon.

No. 93120

And Erika can't file a report against Ashley here because Ashley never made the call :-)

No. 93121

Fuck off, Ashley.

No. 93122

Anyone can fabricate a story here and call it the 'truth'. Ashley was never in a 'hospital for months'. Oh dear, dear, dear. This is going to take more effort than wanted to clean up. Lies just keep being referred to as 'truth'- but I guess nothing can be easy.

No. 93123

LOL at you acting like you put an effort in anything other than putting your hand out to beg or down your throat to puke.

No. 93124

I'm off to get some sleep. Thanks for sharing all that, Twatwaffle. Truly great to hear you did well in recovery and great to hear you managed to shake that dog shit called Ashley off your shoe.

No. 93125

No. 93126

Then just tell us your 'truth,' you fucking cunt. I'm getting really tired of this shit. It's been six months and you're still just the same.

No. 93127

No problem. I gotta turn in myself since I gotta do grown up shit like work and pay for my own cheesecake. Nighters.

No. 93128

Oh we already know her 'truth.' Her mom is abusive, everyone is out to get her, everyone is mean, she can't afford food, etc.

No. 93131

months? lol she's been pulling this shit for 24 years.


really, ashley, you've been outed. everyone knows your cycle of bullshit and can see right through you. at this point your options are one of two:
- pick up your sticker-covered phone and call an ambulance on yourself
- do your mom, your victims, and the world a favor and end it the old fashioned way.

Either way the games are over, and you being a condescending little llady fauntlefaggot and trying to deny and deflect isn't going to work anymore.


No. 93133

Counting down before some screeching rant about TWATWAFFLE AND THE EVIL LOLCOWS on either one of her known tumblr accounts

No. 93136


She'll never mention lolcow on her accounts because then her followers would learn about her.

No. 93137

No. 93138


she's a cunt but it's never okay to tell someone to kill themselves no matter how you dress it up. that's literally illegal.

No. 93139

"stop messing with my life" = "stop turning people off from buying me shit"

No. 93141


I'd be surprised if she hasn't gone to the ED fetishists and gotten them to give her money.

No. 93142

Don't give the little fuck ideas.

No. 93143

Twatwaffle = theforestcat

No. 93144

Ashley for real, reach for the phone to call 911 if you're that desperate for a stretch jesus fucking christ

No. 93164

I like how she used the term pathetic bubble as if her life is anything but that

No. 93177

It's their money. It's better if it's wasted in ash instead of someone with an actual chance of turning their life around.

No. 93182

Ash is like Necrotic sore on her moms arm she loves her arm and needs it for a happy fulfilled life but if it doesn't heal or get removed it's going to keep hurting

No. 93184

I actually feel really uneasy about watching this all unfold, even if from a distance. I just can't fathom how the situation has been allowed to continue. What is it that makes Ash's case "different"? I so wish she'd just fucking answer that one straight instead of skirting around and hinting at shit to make herself seem all mysterious. I would say that she's been deemed terminal by doctors and that she's essentially in hospice at home or something, but she doesn't seem to be getting any care, just enabling…unless she just never talks about it? It seems like if she really had been told that she was ~*~terminal~*~ and there was nothing that could be done for her, she would be milking it for attention/sympathy like crazy.

No. 93185

Ash is acting all morbid and dark I honestly think she is planning to kill herself again and someone should do something before it's too late

No. 93186

Then fucking help her.

No. 93187

She has been killing herself for years now.

No. 93188

Uh, wait, is this Ashley?
How did any of you even find this before she reblogged one of her own posts?

No. 93190

Put down the goddamn hamster and help your friend.

No. 93191

receipts or gtfo. her guts-spilling-over blog is where she was going to post her videos and "the truth" but it's just some weird talking to herself bullshit at this point.

she's no more "dark and morbid" than usual, so enough with the fake guilt trip bullshit because LOLCOW had a fucking Boston Tea Party reenactment with ashley's name on it.

No. 93192

hi, theforestcat. or are we still lurking ashiepoo?

No. 93193

It must suck to be so socially retarded that your only friends are internet drama queens and rodents.

No. 93195

Hi Ashley. Nice try making the eevul cyberbulliez feel bad for "making fun of you." Eat something, keep it down, brush the 3 teeth you have left, wash off your drawn-on eyebrows, comb your 3 remaining hairs on your head, and go to bed.

No. 93197

I'd be upset if she killed herself again.

No. 93199

Someone in Florida call 911.

No. 93200

that's enough theforestcat/ashley.

No. 93201

No. 93202

Ashley's never been suicidal and never will be, she loves the fucking attention and presents too much. When she does finally knock off it'll be a purge gone bad or her heart will realize it should've gone kaput years ago.

No. 93203

I'm going to take a moment to point something out.

There is no mention of Ashley being suicidal anywhere. Not on her 'new blog,' not on her real blog.

There is only an influx of posts in this forum – where Ashley has been established as posting on many times.

She clearly wants one of us to call 911 on her so that she can accuse us of harassment. Or she simply desires the attention from the paramedics.

No one call 911. There is no evidence of her being suicidal anywhere. If you call 911, the only thing that will happen is you'll inflict more medical bills on her mother.

No. 93204

File: 1430716167061.jpg (24.79 KB, 693x229, e.jpg)

No. 93206


holy shit ashley, do you not see how EVERYONE KNOWS YOUR GAMES AND HOW TRANSPARENT YOU ARE? white-knighting yourself on a fucking message board and "oh no she's gonna an hero?"

no bitch. you want help, you have a fucking phone. if you can use it to play victim you can use it to save your own life.

do not call for her.

No. 93207

oh jesus fucking christ leave e alone

No. 93208

Because we know she's obviously not going to kill herself. She's gonna hold onto life with all the strength left on her bony fingers cuz she likes the attention and the free binge food and milking everyone for sympathy.

No. 93210

this entire situation needs to be deleted from existence holy crap

No. 93212



She throws herself at every female (or male, or anyone that pays attention to her), it's part of that BPD splitting shit someone was talking about up above earlier. Idolize then villainize.

LEAVE ERIKA ALONE. SHE IS MARRIED WITH CHILDREN. bony little hooker is probably just mad E wouldn't run away with her and move into their own shitty apartment and puke happily ever after.

No. 93213

if she's so hell bent on having a partner in self destruction why doesn't she throw herself at shmegeh, i mean damn they're both fucking ugly inside and out and are too self-absorbed to actually kill themselves outright

No. 93215

No, I was asking them why we should call 911, lol. I agree that no one should do so.

No. 93216

why continue tormenting others, Ashley? You're such a dumb bitch. Leave Erika alone. You've made it loud and clear that you have no desire for her to get better and that's why she is no longer in your life. You're pathetic. Go fuck yourself.

No. 93217


How is that considered a ~confession~?

Every teenager fantasizes about stuff like that, and since you display stunted growth due to your prolonged (read: boring) self-destruction, this really is no revelation.

No. 93218

Ashley tried, LOL, Shmegeh completely ignored her. Ash wanted to "meet her" or something

No. 93220

we all know these "confessions" are going to be more like "ashley's itemized pleas for attention and sympathy"

No. 93221

Confession #002: I lurk LOLCOW to white knight myself and claim I'm suicidal to get blog hits

No. 93222


No. 93223

Confession #003: I'm really cunthurt the $1500 + erika raised for treatment didn't go towards buying me gift cards and presents, because clearly my barfing weeaboo ass is more important

No. 93226


Confession #004:
There's no proof of where the 24 donuts went because I destroyed the evidence in mere minutes.

No. 93227

I hope she didn't post that to pull at E's heartstrings.

No. 93229

Confession #005:
I destroyed my mothers life

No. 93238

Guize. I think this site has gone too far with this Ashley thread ):

No. 93239

Is tfc still even here? I have a hunch that she disappeared a long time ago and Ashley is the only one white knighting herself.

No. 93240

Maybe nevermind idk

No. 93242

I want all the proana kids to see these threads. See what it does.

No. 93243

I agree somewhat but on the other hand, Ash is posting here and still not acknowledging what she's done and stirring things up. She brings it on herself. If she just hides on Tumblr and quits being such an attention seeking bitch, we'd have nothing to talk about.

No. 93244

She's clearly mentally ill. At this point we're just poking a dying animal.

No. 93245

Yes, but many of the people, probably most that we make fun of here are mentally ill. Asha? PT? Shmegma or whatever her name is… I honestly don't give a shit if she's mentally ill. You're still accountable if you're a complete cunt.

No. 93246

Or just super lulzy.

No. 93255

i've thought that for a while tbh

No. 93256

I think that she stirs up the thread to bring sympathy upon herself and also as a form of self-harm that allowed her to justify her self-destructive behaviors. I am glad that I found the thread because I almost befriended her. But now they just seem to allow her to get more attention for herself. I also don't like that the threads give Ashley a platform to lash out at Erika.

No. 93257

Kind of agree.

No. 93258

This may sound harsh but… I don't care, it's interesting. Erika, as far as I know, will be OK. I would consider stopping all of this if it was causing substantial harm to her but lately Erika has been thanking us. Until that changes, I'm par for the course and want to know how this will play out. Recovery or death, it's interesting and online that is all I care about along with Erika's well-being. I've spoken to her in the past and she's just so… nice? She strikes a chord in me and I'm not sure why.

No. 93260

I'm now laughing my ass off because I'm picturing a flesh-slug in her chair grave writhing and screeching.

No. 93263

We didn't. The post she reblogged is literally the first post on the page. It was the only post for several hours, and she reblogged a bunch of crap to make it seem used.

No. 93276

What WAS the hamtaro-chan fiasco?

No. 93282

>as was her suicide attempt after she was caught

Oh shit deets plz

No. 93297

so it seems she has another tumblr now? guts-spilling-over.tumblr.com
let me guess, she'll expose 'thruths' about herself or… E? how fucking pitiful!
the shit just keeps shitballing out of thirsty control holy fuck.

No. 93324

>transparent no more
seems more like she's trying to stay more anonymous now.
see >>92966

No. 93328

File: 1430744050190.png (111.01 KB, 500x281, cringing.png)

oh god, so much second hand embarrassment.

No. 93334

/Erika isn't the only one who is thankful to you guys btw. I'm just an anorexic anon who was very triggered by Ashley, and seeing her faults exposed (which are my faults too) and being held responsible for her actions is really helping my own recovery./

No. 93341

Lol, how could we call an ambulance anyway when we have no address for her? What do we say? "Some skinny-ass both in Florida is gonna off herself."

Get real.

No. 93342


No. 93345

How new are you? Her address has been posted several times.

No. 93356

I have a question for you, ED people : how can one clog pipes. I've had my share of barfing after meals too big and it wans't nearly solid enough to clog any pipes.
Is there something i'm not getting?

No. 93358

I'm not bulimic, but I've always been under the impression that it happens after repeated sessions over a period of time. Keep in mind some bulimic people can binge and purge over 10,000 - 20,000 calories in a day. I'd imagine that the chunks of leftover undigested food are what does it.

No. 93359

if you have bulimia you puke directly after eating and the food's not digested. It can be very solid (depends whether you wash it down with tons of ice cream, soda etc.)

When I had my bulimic phases I preferred it to be as solid as possible because it was easier to tell if everything was "out". but on the other hand it also increased the risk of choking.

No. 93360

I'm a longtime lurker of this thread so forgive me if I mess up this post (I've never posted before).

I actually heard back from a Dr. Phil producer about Ashley. Here's how it happened: I'm in ED-NOS recovery myself (bingeing, restricting, a little overexercising, but mostly my life has just a neverending binge/restrict rollercoaster). I contacted the producers about a friend of mine, a former roommate from treatment. She's been to inpatient/residential treatment 40+ times and has had multiple feeding tubes. Like Ashley, she has anorexia and also binges + purges. She is currently attempting to recover yet again, and is basically the opposite of Ashley–desperately ill, yet she keeps trying and trying to get better. The problem is nothing EVER seems to stick.

Anyway, I contacted the show about my friend, who we'll call J, a few months ago. I just wanted to see if there were any other options out there for her, since her recent hospital stays haven't seemed to be helping her much. We don't talk (she doesn't really talk to anyone anymore…), so the show was kind of my last resort. In my letter about J, I also included some photos of Ashley and screencaps from her social media profiles. I figured if they were going to try to help one dying girl, they might as well try to help another.

The producer got back to me right away. She told me she's received MULTIPLE write-ins about Ashley, and that she only found my letter about J because she was searching her inbox for messages with Ashley's name.

The kicker is that this producer has, in fact, reached out to Ashley. I'm not sure if it was via Facebook or what, but Ashley did not express any interest. I'm not certain if she outright rejected the offer, but yeah. Ashley was offered treatment/help by someone who has a LOT of resources to get her the best available therapies. Obviously Dr. Phil is tacky as hell but most people would jump on the opportunity for free treatment. Additionally, one would think she would be all over the attention it would give her. I mean, being broadcast on TVs across the country? It's interesting to me that she wouldn't jump at that opportunity.

No. 93361

They'd have a better chance getting her on the show if they just offered her cash instead of therapy.

No. 93364

Yeah, Dr. Phil is all about trashing parents lately (I'm in between jobs and he makes me lol) so I'm surprised she didn't go. Is your friend B?

No. 93366

I wonder if she'd make the show if the producers knew what she does to other people with EDs.

No. 93369


They'd make a killing if ash appeared on the show. I wish the best for your friend btw.

No. 93372

>>93364 I'm not sure who/what B is!

>>93360 Thanks, I hope she finally recovers someday. It's such a sad situation. Like Ashley, she lives alone at home with her parents and has never had a job, never even had a real life of her own. My ED is definitely still a daily battle but I've at least experienced adult life on my own. And I've not had to be hospitalized dozens upon dozens of times. But it's just like with the Ashley situation…if someone ultimately doesn't WANT to recover, you can't force them to. Me, my ED took me in the opposite direction of underweight–I was so obese that I was prediabetic and couldn't walk anymore. That was the straw that broke the camel's back for me, and I knew I had to fix my relationship with food and exercise or I'd be fucking dead before 35. It's a long, hard, lonely road sometimes. Food is everywhere and for anyone who struggles with it, whether in the anorexic or binge eating spectrum, it's tantamount to torture sometimes. You can't think about anything else, and other people around you just don't get it. Why can't you eat normally? How can you spiral into binge eating all day one day and yet be obsessing over calories the next? Why aren't you good enough at starving, why can't you make yourself puke properly, why do certain foods make you go insane? I've lost 120lbs yet I still feel like I look enormous and monstrous. It takes me hours to get ready sometimes because I'm obsessing over the loose skin and general sagginess that yo-yo dieting and disordered eating has blessed me with. You always think things will just ~be perfect~ when you get to that goal weight…but they never are.

Fuck EDs. And fuck Ashley for glorifying them.

No. 93382

idk, im a social worker, an LMSW, and i've had schizophrenic and schizoaffective clients put in the hospital against their will. one of them countless times and she was in there for 3+ months during 1 admission.
i feel like society, and doctors, view anorexia and schiz to be very different when it comes to mental competency, but at a certain point, the anorexic is just as much a danger to themselves as the schizophrenic, if not more so. and at the end of the day, they're both axis 1 diagnoses, and ash has plenty problems on axes 2,3,4, and 5(her gaf score must be incredibly low) as well. so i just don't understand why she's not in the hospital whether she likes it or not. If she was on my caseload i promise she would be.
the ONLY explanation i can think of is mom IS receiving SSI $$ for ash, mom is also the rep payee, and either needs the $$ to pay bills, OR, figures ash can't be saved at this point anyway so why lose the monthly check?

No. 93383

Ehh I think the ONLY positive thing to say about Ashley is that she DOESN'T glorify EDs. Look at her, she's an intolerable mess, any issues she had before have been perpetuated by her ED and she looks like an AIDs patient who hadn't been treated and is going to die soon. This is not glorifying anything. This is a painfully real look at the actual effects of anorexia and I don't think any pro-ana girls could possibly look at Ashley and not realize that this isn't the life they want for themselves.

She's a monster, but she isn't glorifying anything. Her life is miserable. Everyone around her is miserable because of her. Her mum's waiting for her to die. There's nothing 'glorified' about any of it.

No. 93385

there should be no medical bills for her mother. Ash is an adult, the bills would be in her name, not rebeccas. But really, theres no fucking way she doesn't have medicaid which would cover everything. And if by some freak chance she doesn't, the ER social worker would apply for emergency medicaid and she'd be approved.

No. 93389


You don't have to look a certain way in order for you to glorify EDs.

She takes pictures of $75 binge food hauls and puts cute stamps and glitter on them.

She has publicly wished "fatness" on people that were mean to her, because becoming fat is the worst punishment she can think of, and by making that thought public, she promotes being thin as something to strive for instead.

She has also voiced gems such as "I will beat them all.", referring to her becoming the "best" anorectic, implying that there is achievement waiting.

She has commented anonymously on this very site that "well, Ash is still alive, so she must be doing SOMETHING right."

No. 93391

i don't think she'd agree to appearing on the show. it would be way too much exposure for her. and a kind that she can't control.
i mean they could do a thing like "deadly anorexic girl gets bullied online" OR they could go with "anorexic girl refuses to get treatment, tortures her mother and glorifies EDs online"

No. 93393

Unfortunately, you're wrong. In the United States, when your child, spouse, etc. dies, the responsibility to pay for any debt incurred falls on the parent or spouse.

You mention the ER covering it; that's only after they exhaust all other options. This means that they would still go after Rebecca first.

I've held off on killing myself so far because I can't bear the thought of inflicting my student loans and unpaid medical bills on my mother.

It's like in Japan how when someone kills themselves by jumping onto the train tracks, they fine the family for the cost it takes to clean it up.

What is there to do at this point? Getting nationwide attention is her only option, and she disdains it.

No. 93394

I still don't see most of that as glorifying though? To me, glorifying is pretending that you can be that thin and suffer no adverse effects. Felice Fawn glorifies imo, with like, photoshopping herself thinner and then photoshopping out any flaws. She pretends it's a fine way of life. When she does mention that things aren't PERFECT it's kind of in the "sad mysterious girl" type of Effy from skins bullshit rather than a realistic "I am actually mentally ill and a danger to myself and those around me, I'm sabotaging my own life at every turn. This will have lasting effects and repercussions on my health and life in general for a long time."

Ashley, on the other hand, is clearly miserable. At this point we (Ash included) all know that she has utterly destroyed her life. There's nothing happy about her position. What she's doing is really fucked up, there's no doubting it, but to me the pictures of the $75 binge haul is more like… "look at what people are buying for me" or "look at the money we all know I'm wasting"

Wishing fatness on people is typical ED sufferer behavior though. Like, when someone's spiteful, they wish what they think is the Worst Possible Thing on whoever they're pissed off with and to someone with an ED, that thing is very often being fat. So I can see why it's a glorification but it's definitely a symptom of the underlying issue too. I can't really imagine an anorexic who DOESN'T see fatness as the worst thing they could wish on someone. Making that thought public is just another expression of her messed up thoughts and how hateful she is as a person. She's not a nice person and she has a platform to express when she wishes ill on people. To her, her idea of fatness IS wishing ill on them.

"I will beat them all" is, imo, the most terrifying thing she says. It sounds like a race to the death. I don't know how that's glorifying either because it just sounds like another example of how sick and twisted she is. How fucked up her thought process is that this slow death is just a competition.

I didn't know she commented saying that, though. Yeah, that's definitely glorifying it. How could she think she's doing ANYTHING right?

I guess the way I see it is that people who glorify have admirers, they have fans. Ashley has an audience full of people who pity her and await the end of this odd and twisted story that's unfolding before them. People who glorify to their audiences have people who envy them. Ashley lives in a one bedroom (?) apt with her mother, has never had a life of her own, and has a wheelchair. She isn't functional remotely. Maybe she tries to glorify but there's absolutely no covering up the truth.

No. 93397

reach out to her friends or her mother

No. 93403

Student loans are discharged upon death and I'm pretty sure that unless your parent or spouse consigns something or leaves an estate with money, bill collectors are out of luck.

No. 93404

Or the deceased leaves an estate with money*

No. 93405

But please don't kill yourself.

No. 93413

No. 93414

Holy shit she JUST posted it. How obsessed IS lolcow?

No. 93415

lmao, how do you know?

No. 93416

Because I've been lurking here, obv clicked the link and it says the time she posted.

No. 93417

She looks cute.

No. 93419

No more obsessed than you Ashley, for refreshing this page as soon as you uploaded it.

And holy shit, so assuming that the therapist had to be imaginary was giving this therapist the benefit of the doubt. This needs to be sent to APS. What the fuck kind of incompetent therapist wastes time during a session to help a severely mentally and physically ill person film some stupid social media video? He should have committed her ages ago. Assuming the hand belongs to an actual therapist he needs to be reported for malpractice asap. This video is evidence. APS could investigate him for abuse/neglect and may already have his info if she used him as proof she's getting "help."

No. 93420

Are you insane? Looks so damn scary

No. 93421

You know nothing.

No. 93423


Fat privilege is not being recommended by the salespeople to try looking in the childrens' department for clothes. I dunno. This is really frustrating.

Technically, there are petite shops and petite departments, and yes, they cost more, and also are generally kinda grandma-styled. But plus size stores are everywhere and offer more contemporary fashions.

I used to get bullied a lot (when I was a grown ass adult, by other grown ass adults) for being too thin as well. Like I've got control over my size. And also they'll say "anorexia" as if it's the anorexic person's fault and something they can just fix overnight, when it really isn't.

So yeah I have trouble understanding the whole "thin privilege" thing tbh.

No. 93424

Should be "average privilege" not "thin privilege".

No. 93426

i was wondering about that actually. what would be the purpose of him filming that? isn't he supporting her escapism that way?

No. 93427

On a side note, I am 99.9% sure I know who you're talking about (J) and I do hope she's able to overcome her demons. She just seems to go from hospital/treatment to death's door to hospital/treatment over and over and over again. I've always wondered why, if she's so committed to recovery, though, she's so reliant on/fond of all of her tubes and why she takes soooooo many sick-looking/thinspo-esque/hospital photos.

No. 93429

Her therapist should not be practicing if he's taking a near-death patient and enabling her

No. 93430

Oh, I know who this is. She thinks that she's going to find a magical treatment center. It's about using the tools you're given, which are the same no matter where you go. Her parents shouldn't be bringing her Starbucks coffee with espresso shots in the hospital, FFS

No. 93431

If Ashley's therapist is filming these videos,she'll be less inclined to lie.

No. 93432

someone save the vids

No. 93433

Oh god yeah, I definitely wouldn't be giving my severely emaciated, hospitalized daughter huge cups of coffee with six shots of caffeine and letting her smoke cigarettes; I'd be worried her heart couldn't take it

No. 93434

*shots of espresso, durrrr

No. 93435

No she doesn't. She looks like a yellow skeleton. A human that's about to die.

If that's a therapist, he's as dodgy as the scratch artist who gave her tattoos. So long as he gets some $ out of it, he doesn't give a fuck what she does during the time.

No. 93436

Do therapists have some sort of professional governing body? Maybe these videos should be forwarded to them.

No. 93437

Who the fuck is filming the video?

No. 93438

Oh wait never mind.

No. 93439

Note that she actually calls him/her "doctor" in the video. Meaning he/she is either a Ph.D or actual M.D (psychiatrist) correct? That's even more disturbing than if he/she is simply just a licensed therapist.

No. 93440

I've always called mine by their fist name.

No. 93441


No. 93442


Seconding that this isn't right at all. Since the founders, America has been really against inherited debt and debtors prisons. If you have any assets when you die, they'll take your debt out of that, but your family doesn't have to pay off your debt. Not sure where you got this idea.

No. 93445

Alright, i'm calling it. That's not actual therapist / doctor.
Why would she be so overly eager to prove that he's a therapist, especially with the pause before redundantly adding "doctor". And then emphasising his existence when he waves ("LOOK! There he was!"). And still all we know now is, that there's some guy behind the cam.
Her microgestures give her away also (when talking about this being therapy).
Besides, the room looks like a storeroom, someone could open the door and hit her.
And there's the obvious sign: which fucking therapist would film that?

No. 93446

There's been a lot of talk in the past about the legitimacy of her therapist and I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt - she is pretty far gone and what can they do but give her someone to talk to?
This is beyond fucked up, though. Why would any professional encourage her to make these videos for the internet? Even if she hasn't been honest about this board or other people trolling her, why would they set her up to be ridiculed with videos? I've had my fair share of incompetent and out-of-touch doctors, but this is pretty unforgivable. That also doesn't look like any therapist's office I've ever seen.

Ashley, PLEASE explain the doctor situation and why you aren't in a hospital. Are you terminal? Why isn't anyone helping you?

No. 93449

Maybe got arrested for shoplifting at Target and that's the holding room.

Representing what from Death Note? What IS this shit?

No. 93453

btw, where do you see the time? i only see the day: May 4th, 2015

No. 93455


Dang, you guys are good. Her mom seems…misguided, to say the least. How she's able to get away with bingeing/purging and smoking weed (not that I think this is her biggest problem) right under her nose is beyond me. The Dr. Phil show was actually extremely interested in talking to J and her parents. But they declined. I begged and pleaded with her mom, but still, no interest. I guess that 41st time at treatment will be the charm, right? I wanted them to go on Phil bc there is something seriously weird going on in that family, but I'm too far away and detached from the situation to really pinpoint what it is specifically.

No. 93456

Pretty sure it's medical marijuana. But yeah, that whole situation is weird. She has her parents totally manipulated. Can't help but wonder what will happen when she's 26 and no longer able to benefit from her parents nice insurance. Medicaid sucks. Unless they can pay out of pocket.

No. 93457

File: 1430770328506.jpg (20.84 KB, 396x380, m.JPG)

That video is tagged #eating disorders.

So these are going to be videos about that? Will she talk about her other disorders which give her a disgusting personality?

No. 93458

Does she motion his name/does he appear in the video? I don't want to watch it because she really disturbs me in motion.

No. 93459


No. 93460


It hurts to look at her. I don't know if it's pity or plainly because it's so aesthetically unpleasing… but ugh

No. 93461


As far as I know they have exhausted a considerable amount of $ on treatment already. I doubt they would be able to afford very much out of pocket at this point.

I've been on Medicaid and ED treatment is basically nonexistent. Very, very few mental health providers accept it. It definitely does suck.

Regarding Ashley, there is no way in hell that's a real therapist or therapist's office. I can't screencap but whoever it is, their fingers looked really…wrinkly? Weird. Almost like they just got out of a long bath. Or it's someone with an ED themselves? That was just a weird-looking fucking hand, is all I'm saying.

No. 93463

After like four times in treatment I would be having a SERIOUS talking to my adult yet completely dependent daughter. Forty rounds, though…damn. Why does anyone think more of the same is going to help?

No. 93464

No. 93465

Some people like being in treatment. The constant care.

No. 93466

File: 1430770791447.jpg (29.32 KB, 744x411, doc.JPG)

This is the "doctor's" appearance.

No. 93467


Yeah, this is someone who developed seriously unhealthy attachments to the staff at her treatment centers. Some girls do this, especially when they've been at it from such a young age (she went into inpatient ED treatment for two years in High School, which means she missed 2yrs of school and spent those formative years among other girls with EDs/mental illnesses). Honestly for-profit mental health treatment can be really, really fucked up. They will keep you as long as they can so long as your insurance will pay for it, but they'll also kick you out at the drop of a hat if your coverage is dropped. I fully believe that someone who has been to treatment 40+ times needs to find another way to recover. That's just not healthy.

And then you have Ashley, who won't even go at all.

No. 93468


it seriously looks like an anorexic person's hand.

No. 93470

Something is shady. Therapists and doctors are mandated reporters so there's no way any professional would just deal with Ashley and not report her to APS, a hospital, etc.

No. 93471

Yeah, and she wants to go to Castlewood which is known for holding people with Cadillac insurance for longer than needed. Plus the whole, implanting false memories of abuse and destroying families thing. That place is a cult.

No. 93473

I'm sure the doctor knows the law and her situation better than any of us lol. She's either terminal or there's something legal we're overlooking.

No. 93474

She said she thought her dad didn't know she smoked weed. I don't know why she'd hide it or how he wouldn't know if she had a legit MMJ card, since she's their dependent and all. I don't know.

I'm sure her parents will just pay for private insurance for her when she turns 26.

Yeah I definitely get the feeling she derives some gratification from the safety/care/attention/whatever of being in intensive treatment and of being sick, of having a tube, of showing everyone how she looks like death, etc. She's a "professional anorexic." I've met a fair number of them in my time. They're eerily similar.

Sorry for the sidetrack. Back to your regularly scheduled spoopy skeleton discussion.

No. 93475


No. 93476

>assuming there is a doctor

No. 93477

File: 1430771582150.gif (490.14 KB, 260x146, l1rye.gif)

No. 93478

wow such infallible evidence, everything has now become clear

No. 93479

Well, I'm convinced!

No. 93480

File: 1430771734077.png (776.43 KB, 721x767, rrdb.PNG)


"looks cute"

No. 93481

She's either terminal or getting some sort of treatment to keep her alive. I just don't fucking know. Those of you who were friends with her, has she told you anything? idk this is fucked up.

No. 93483

Does she have bottom teeth?

No. 93488

These threads should be required reading for anyone who wants to learn how to become anorexic.

No. 93489

You would think that, given her personality, she would brag about either of those things, though. She'd get tons of attention.

No. 93490

To put things in perspective, Erika's had to fight to gain as much as she can because her weight is still too low for residential treatment much less outpatient. Even a dedicated eating disorder facility considers someone at that low a weight to be a liability and dangerous to treat before medical stabilization.

Meanwhile Ashley is sitting in a closet with some shady quack who agreed to film her for tumblr? That's unprofessional at best and criminally negligent at worst. According to Florida statutes her therapist could definitely petition to have her hospitalized. Even if she's terminal she has immediate health problems that hospitalization could alleviate.

No. 93491

File: 1430772459264.png (709.83 KB, 774x637, rjrwj.PNG)


A handful.

No. 93492

I think she's terminal and in denial. She survived past her 24th birthday, which was the timeline her doctor gave her.

No. 93493

Who is this "J" you guys are talking about?

No. 93494

Don't worry about her. She's not a bad person. Just very sick. Nothing lolcow worthy about her.

No. 93498

For a split second I thought she was on an episode of judge judy

No. 93499

It looks like an old man's hand. It just doesn't make sense. Didn't she have inappropriate relationships with older men when she was camwhoring? Could it be possible her "therapy visits" are a cover up for meetings with a random old creep and her mom doesn't care enough to check?

No. 93501

I wouldn't put it past her. This saga is getting weirder and weirder.

No. 93503

Is it one of Ashley's friends? Gummibear Princess or w/e?

No. 93504

That room is grotty. Even with low funding for mental health services here, for therapy we get a nice, clean, orderly room complete with box of tissues. Wherever she is, it's hardly condusive to a relaxing atmoshpere where you can feel comfortable.

No. 93505

and there's no way, even with my permission, a therapist would ever agree to filming me.

No. 93506

Yeah, I think he's not a real doctor. Wha kind of doctor would waste appointment time with this shit?

No. 93507

Idk where she he, or who he is, but all I can think of is how Rebecca's possibly having to pay for this shit.

No. 93508

Could be one of those public health clinics right??

No. 93509

where she is* goddammnit

No. 93510

An end of life counselor. She's terminal.

No. 93511

It's neckbeard. They're in neckbeard's mom's closet.

No. 93512

Why would she be declared terminal when she's so young?

No. 93513

Because shes dying?

No. 93514

For someone like Ashley who's sitting on bones and uses a wheelchair, you'd try to make her visit easier by giving her cushions of pillows instead of sticking her on an armless chair.

Something stinks to high heaven.

No. 93515

That crossed my mind very early on ;)

No. 93516

It seems unethical because anorexia isn't like stage 4 cancer. She's not even in hospice care.

No. 93518

Yeah. I doubt they'd label her terminal. That's when there's no hope of recovery because a person's body is INFESTED with cancer or w/e and there's no other way but death.

The only thing making Ashley unable to get well(er) is her ~pro Ana lifestyle~

No. 93520

With the lack of care she's getting, something is wrong. If she's not terminal, how is this happening?

No. 93522


No. 93525

Exactly. It's not an inoperable tumor where they literally can't do anything. There is treatment available and apparently she's been offered a free ride by Dr. Phil (who would send her to a nice private facility I'm sure) so it's not like she doesn't have the option. Even if her organs are hopelessly fucked they could still make her more comfortable and possibly extend her life a little in hospital.

No. 93526

idk, but it happens. i know someone in Ashley's situation. she's dropped off the radar until something happens like she passes out in public, she's taken to hospital for potassium or w/e, her mother's called to say her goodbyes, she recovers and THEY LET HER GO. it happens.

No. 93527

Dr. Phil would be the best move Ash could ever make. Not only would she get free treatment (which she could "resist" if she really has no intention of getting better), but she'd also gain new fans who would be willing to send her shit for sure.

No. 93528

This is the woman I mentioned long ago who blocked up her neighbours drains with puke. Every day I wonder if she's still alive (and doubt it), but my boyfriend saw her last week. ED took hold at 19 and she's FORTY TWO now. See, Ashley's not special, this woman even looks worse if you can imagine that.

No. 93529

I really think that if his producers were to contact Rebecca, she'd find a way to convince Ash to go on the show.

No. 93530

I know, right? She could have a multi episode arc!

No. 93532

Ashley doesn't even need to give up her eating disorder if she goes on Dr. Phil. It's her best possible move and she should really consider it.

No. 93533

(Shit. Going to have to see if Dr Phil's on youtbe. Never seen it over here).

No. 93534

The only possible problem with the Dr Phil idea is how to get her to Cali.

No. 93535

All of the born-again Christian grandmas and stay-at-home moms who watch dr Phil would love her and def send her money and food.

No. 93537

Satellite interview

No. 93538


and pokemon? i think pokemon might be the deal breaker here.

No. 93541

His viewing audience probably thinks Pokemon is witchcraft so probably no Pokemon. ;(

No. 93542

Didn't the Christians get over Pokemon in like 1999?

No. 93544

File: 1430775141459.jpg (11.52 KB, 260x143, OO.JPG)

No. 93545

Ash just needs to carry her own oxygen on the plane, which Dr Phil would probably pay for.

No. 93546

I just took his personality test and he's saying I'm neurotic.

No. 93548

Better than necrotic I suppose.

No. 93550

Ash is necrotic.

No. 93552

yea sorry you're absolutely wrong. please don't kill yourself tho.

No. 93553

i did not mention "the ER covering it". I said the ER social worker would apply for emergency medicaid, which is basically applying for medicaid but expedited. Please, I'm a social worker, i spent 2 years in grad school learning how to get all the government eligibilities possible. And by govt eligibilities, i mean all the $$ and free shit you can possibly get depending on your circumstances. everything from medicaid, SNAP, home heating oil assistance, SSI/SSDI, an obama phone, whatever

No. 93554

erika should go on dr phil

No. 93555

File: 1430777103515.jpg (51.37 KB, 275x347, obama-phone.jpg)

No fair. I live in Canada and I get free healthcare, but no free phone. This is BS.

No. 93558

Go cry in your poutine

No. 93564

Maybe Ash would be more comfortable with Oprah.

No. 93566

She hates black people remember?

No. 93567

that video is fucking disgusting. it's like watching a corpse talk.

No. 93568

I don't think that hand looks anorexic, honestly.

No. 93569

there are actually Obama phones? Free phones from Obama? Don't laugh at my foolish, I am not from your land.

No. 93570

ohh it took me a minute, but i know who (J) is too. Everything you said is true.. deaths door->hospital->treatment center->repeat. only wants to go to tx centers that allow tubes. theres a few "professional patients" like her who are pretty popular on tumblr/IG.

No. 93572

yea like NASW = national association of social work.
i know if its a social worker seeing ash, NASW would love to see it. he'd lose his license if its not palliative care.

No. 93581

no, J def has nothing to do with ash and company.

No. 93582

Not "Obama" phones necessarily, but there are government-funded phones. They're for those who can't afford them. They were around before Obama's term though.

No. 93584

He must be desperate for Medicaid money based on his horrible office space.

No. 93585

File: 1430780537521.jpg (205.92 KB, 569x429, SafeLink-Wireless-Phones.jpg)


I have an "Obama" phone. It's just a free cellphone service, cause I'm a poor shit. They're terrible cellphones but they can call numbers and that's all cellphones need to be able to do.

Pic is kinda like the ad I saw and applied for lol

No. 93586

Could faith based counseling be a possibility? It'd explain why she stumbled trying to call him Doctor and the shitty office space. Those take like a few hours of "certification" and usually operate on sliding scale. As to whether they're mandated reporters I'm not sure, though if they're not that could be the only way Rebecca has managed to get Ashley to see anyone. It'd also explain the blatant unprofesionnalism in filming the little cuntsmear for her Tumblr.

No. 93588

Everything about this raises questions re:professional regulations and ethics. He is def not a therapist. if he is one, he should not be practicing.

No. 93589

The way she pronounces the two Japanese phrases she knows irritates me waaaay more than it should. Or maybe it's just her voice… it's like fingernails on a chalkboard to my ears.

I don't think they're in a storage closet. That door behind her has one of those knobs with the hole in one side and a lock on the other, so she's probably in front of a bathroom or something. Maybe they're in a hallway.

No. 93592

well, SW is one of, if not the lowest, paying masters level profession in the country. jokes aside, social workers are the best ;)

No. 93595

Faith based counseling makes sense.

No. 93596

No reasonable clinician would take her as a client

No. 93597

What kinda doctor would film her first therapy session? Doctor Nick?

No. 93598

Is that what she called him? Is his first name Nicholas?

No. 93599

Dr. Nickalaus Boyd Stoutzenberger. He's usually a pediatric therapist, specializing in anal retentive behavior.

No. 93602

Dr. Nicholas Riviera, yes.

No. 93603



shut the fuck up about these people or name them.

No. 93605

Idk why that anon brought her up when we moved on. She's not a lolcow.

No. 93606


No. 93607

My therapist psychiatrist are in a shit building and it honestly looks worse then this so it could be he is legit

No. 93608


I'm guessing he was the only one she could find. Therapists typically do not want to treat ppl with BPD or EDs and she has both.

No. 93609

Lol thought it was a Simpsons reference.

No. 93610

No, the public health clinics are pretty nice-looking in general. I was just in one the other day and it looks much better than my actual doctor's office.

No. 93611

>pretends to make intro video for her beloved followers
>actually just wants to prove to lolcow that her therapist is real

"transparent no more" my ass.
More like transparent as fuck.

No. 93613

The lack of transparency is how she's managed to sustain people's interest for so long, lol.

No. 93614

Uh, this isn't relevant to Ashley, but would you have any idea how someone could go about getting SSDI if they've never worked and aren't in contact with their family?

No. 93615

google it

No. 93618

Thank you for your thoughtful advice, but I've googled it many times, and I can't find a straight answer. I'm looking for information from any source I can.

No. 93622

My two minutes of Google say you're ineligible for SSDI if you have never worked. But you might get SSI http://www.disabilitysecrets.com/page10-10.html

No. 93624

You can try meeting with a disability attorney. Most of them work on a contingent fee basis (they don't get paid unless you get your benefits). Or you might be able to get free advice through a local law schools student clinic.

No. 93626

You need work credits for SSDI. If you don't have any but are disabled, you can get SSI.

No. 93628

File: 1430784556881.jpg (11.14 KB, 450x58, fourassedcat.JPG)

How is making a phonecam video a step? A step to what?

> I will continue to fight each day

Fight. How is she fighting?


No. 93634

a step to getting more attention

No. 93635


and fighting for that attention.

No. 93636

Hate to play devil's advocate but I could believe that is a shoddy therapist's office. My old shrink was basically located in a hallway. Though it did have couches at least. (Incidentally, this was also in Florida.) And if it's just some counselor and not an actual phd/md, I could see them agreeing to filming something for Ashley as part of therapy or something.

No. 93639

A step to "beating Erika".

No. 93640

Amendment: I should say "therapy". With someone as bad off as she is they probably play Chinese checkers the rest of the time. She needs intensive inpatient treatment, not counseling.

No. 93642

I'm sure the manipulative cow could make it seem like she's doing it ~as part of therapy~
Seriously. Using a therapy session to make a tumblr post. That's just…

It's time wasting therapy. She probably spend the rest of the session explaining Death Note to him and cosplay and her stickers on her phone case.

Erika's going to have a decent life after recovery. Ashley's still going to be rotting away. Yep, Ash. You beat her good.

No. 93645

I'm getting really sick of this fake bitch commenting on everything. Does she think she's helping?

No. 93646

Erika's going to be stuffed with fat, and Ash will stay pure.

No. 93648

Let's not even say that in a joking way. Might trigger someone or plant a seed

No. 93649

Whichever of Ashley's friends you are, could you kindly go get fucked? I've defended her in this thread to the point of being called a white knight before and I'm fucking finished with it now. If she doesn't want to recover, fine, that's on her and all of you enablers, but don't you DARE say anything like this that might trigger someone who is actually trying to live life and not waste it. You are disgusting.

No. 93650

Fuck off. I was referencing the phone call she made.

No. 93651

She's hurting Ashley by reinforcing her delusions.

No. 93652

Still not funny. Still a risk.

No. 93653

File: 1430786366720.gif (426.21 KB, 380x254, triggers.gif)

No. 93654

Considering Erika's admitted that phone call still bothers her, it is a trigger, dumbass

No. 93655

File: 1430786514666.jpg (35.75 KB, 264x373, Bawwwww_bunny.jpg)

No. 93656

Delete your internet, anon.

No. 93657

Okay except we know there's someone with anorexia who is trying desperately to recover, so for once, 'trigger' is a genuine thing and not something to be laughed at.

No. 93658

She's annoying is what she is.

No. 93660

Eh, I think we should give the Anon's some slack. It was obviously said sarcastically. Although not tasteful, I think Erika would understand the reference. She used to be a /b/tard. She gets it.

When? Recently?

No. 93661

Guys, Erika is awesome but this is still lolcow.

No. 93663

It is annoying but she's def legitimizing Ashley's victim complex and cheering her on as her BPD continues to spiral out of control. Is she going to pat her on the back as Ash snarks on Erika too? TFC, you have to pick a side because at this point you're coming off as a false friend.

No. 93664

Everyone here probably posts ~triggering~ shit whether they know it or not. Anons talking about their EDs and vomit conversations. You can't not say something because you think one person's not going to like it.

No. 93665

I don't think tfc gives a shit about either of them. She probably just wants asspats for being ~*so nice*~ and ~*tolerant*~ of people with mental problems.

No. 93667


No. 93668

Probably. She talks to the, the same way I talk to kindergarteners.

No. 93669

i really want to see a picture of ash in her wheelchair

No. 93670

In her defense, Ash is mentally a kindergartener.

No. 93671

No. 93675

File: 1430787379798.gif (17.44 KB, 165x271, timmeh.gif)

No. 93678

Timmeh doesn't deserve that

No. 93682

If you're that fucking easily triggered, go back to Tumblr. I personally don't believe in triggers except in rare circumstances.

No. 93683

True. He does things with his life. His band etc.

No. 93684

He doesn't let being a retard in a wheelchair with a huge head and tiny, emaciated body stop him from living his life to the fullest.

No. 93685

Lucky you!

No. 93689

We've moved on. And ironically, the person who posted the gifs/macros was obviously triggered by people telling her they were triggered #butthurt

No. 93691

Cute how she didn't stay around to keep going!

No. 93700

Yeah I totally left.

No. 93717

Therapist, or babysitter?

No. 93725

Erika, as soon as you're able, look into getting an order of protection for you and your daughters against Yustas' step-father

No. 93730

This. Your little ones should not be anywhere near him.

No. 93772


As long as her body gets a break from binging and purging I don't care. Maybe he actually helps her. But she should be committed ASAP.

No. 93785

Damn. I'd non-literally kill to get on that show. I clam up everytime I think about reaching out any more than I have. I'm sick-scared I'm going to be rejected tomorrow as a special exception. That would mean I'd have to wait until I gained enough weight on my own to get treatment, pretty crazy sounding when you type it out. I live in Daytona and there are no centres here in Florida that will actually take me without heavily considering me as an exception. I learned that the hard way, unfortunately through many rejections (Fairwinds, recovery village, turning point, renfrew). I'd have to keep appealing and being rejected just to get into a plac I already feel worthless. Denver has been so kind to me, my insurance went ahead with an exception in their part for the ERC, but denied the acute center, in place I could go to my local hospital, which does not treat eating disorders, I would have to go to the ER for issues (125 co pay each time). Or if this exception on the ERC's side goes through, I have a 3000 deductible and plane tickets/car rental for the 40min drive- which is realistic and feasible with our credit. No one here -"family"ever cared enough to try to help me in any way. I had to fight till near death, I remember fainting at the mandatory staircase to get to the main level at that stupid condo in Boca. I was deathly ill and alone with two beautiful children. That rage is what fuels me now. I have to do this alone physically. The only support I have is my Instagram which is mostly followed by very ill girls ._. I hope that by following me I can be a good example of committing AN suicide (that's how I describe it, the hate and fear, from death to life). Sorry I write so much, I got weighed today and I broke into tears when my nurse, the one I have seen for years wiped her face. I'm up from64-nearly 80lbs now. I'm really emotional and sappy . oh God good thoughts for tomorrow .

No. 93792

Those very ill girls need someone like you to set an example for them. Who knows, you may be planting the seed in their minds that eventually saves them.

No. 93794


I understand you want to be an example for others but I also hope that you remember to be kind and patient with yourself.

No. 93804

dont put too much pressure on yourself to be a role model for other people, keep your own well being and health in the forefront of importance, okay?

No. 93808


No. 93819

I think your account has a positive effect on the sick girls. Many of them probably started following you as "thinspo," which isn't your fault. I think it's also opening a lot of their eyes. Just the way your writing has changed shows how your mind is working better now that your brain is getting nourishment (I'm not saying that you were a dummy before!). I think you're inspiring a lot of people. I'm eating disordered myself, though it's not so bad these days, and reading how you talk about food and vitality makes me feel foolish (in a healthy way) for my own vilification of food.

That being said, I agree that you shouldn't worry about being a role model or a good example. You've done so much good already; there's nothing wrong with just looking out for yourself and your kids right now, though.

I think you mentioned Rogers at one point, maybe that your insurance covers it, but that it's not a good choice because it's up in the Midwest, so far away from your family, which makes sense. Just keep it in mind, in your back pocket, that their program is quite good.

No. 93821

Just remember that if any of those girls start to bother you, or if any of them start to have a negative effect on your life, you can block them. You are not their mother, and you did not break them, so you are not responsible for fixing them.

No. 93822

flordia doesn't have mmj yet. she would've had to get it from a dealer or traveled to a state that is medical

No. 93823

An anon said that Ash doesn't romanticize EDs like the girls who want to be Cassie from Skins or whatever and be skinny AF but never talk about any detrimental health effects. I guess that's true in that Ash mentions comas and ambulances and wounds not healing and a strong wind blowing her away, not to mention her physical appearance itself.

But… at the same time, she doesn't want people to know that her hair and teeth are fake, and she avoids photos with the wheelchair. One time she mentioned that she's an exercise addict and how she was off to the gym to compete with her mother… is exercise possible when yo