No. 1625265[Reply]
Vent about how parents and/or other family fucked over you/your dreams by making terrible choices for you via neglect, close mindedness, laziness, totally ignoring what you wanted etc and how your coping as an adult.
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My mom hates me, like, she straight up doesn't like me at best. It started back when I was a kid, when I barely had any personality to begin with, yet according to her I was already the bad kid, the black sheep, the difficult one, "evil" and "ill-mannered", no matter how hard I tried to do what she wanted, it was never enough, she never approved of me and always assumed I had malignant motives. I've several brothers, she would always compare me to them, she still does nowadays, everything I do "wrong" they do it right and better, they're "innocent and responsible" while I am "chaotic and evil", when they hurt me is "deserved" and "I prolly did something to piss them off", when I hurt them I'm "unreasonable and violent", when something gets damaged I "obviously" did it, when I mess up or break something by accident I "did it purposely" to "piss her off".
What hurts me the most, it's the way there's never peace when we interact, even when I'm feeling neutral or talking to her politely she will snap at me at random, claiming something I said was actually "rude" or that I got "malicious motives" yet again, I don't understand, how am I supposed to avoid her wrath when even the most basic of sentences sets her off? Sometimes I gotta move to another room just so she stops trying to pick fights with me or avoid any interaction all together. One day it got so bad, my dad had to physically stop her from going too far: my DAD has to remind my mom that I am, in fact, her daughter. Not her enemy or a random bitch from the streets, her daughter, she was going off on me with such sheer hatred and lack of restraint you would think I'm some kind of trashy crackheaded and not her literal relative.
I just wish she didn't hate me so, so much, really. I avoid looking too much into her eyes because she's usually looking at me with cold disdain, our relationship is so damaged, and even then, I'm sick of fighting. I don't want to fight her, but it's of no use if she herself doesn't give a crap about our relationship as mother and daughter. One day she'll be gone, and I'll be left with this painful scar on my soul, a wound that nobody should ever experience. I don't know what kind of consequences this type of situation has on a woman's psyche, and I'm too afraid too ask atp