This is a support thread for women who have been abused by an intimate partner, whether physically, verbally, emotionally, sexually, or in some other form. Discussion of experiences with either male or female abusers are welcome, but please keep the focus of this thread on the unique circumstances involving partners (e.g., boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse) rather than other types of relationships.
Topics of discussion may include things such as:
>lasting damages stemming from manipulative or violent behavior and how to heal>advice for leaving an ongoing relationship>tips for protecting your physical, legal, or financial safety after leaving>venting about past experiences>recovery milestones, positive growth/changes made after abuses>unlearning warped beliefs instilled by a past partner>building new, healthy relationships with genuine love and respectPlease avoid infighting by comparing whose experiences were worse or blaming
victims by implying that they "had it coming," "asked for it," or "deserved" the mistreatment. The feelings felt by
victims are complex and women frequently experience genuine feelings of affection or attachment to their abusers, or face risks and consequences if they consider leaving; while it is desirable that all women who are in an unhealthy relationship may escape, please try to be sympathetic that sometimes a woman may hold onto lingering sentiments, wind up going back, or not feel ready/safe enough to immediately leave her situation just yet, and that these are all common and normal for these situations.
Many women find it stressful (and reminiscent of the abuser) when they are told what exactly they ought to do or feel in response to abusiveness, and it is often more helpful to encourage her to build her confidence and self-worth rather than push decisions onto her. The average woman attempts to leave 7 times before escaping for good.
Resources:
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