You could always adopt. If you go ahead and become a parent just make sure you have a support system because having a child can trigger
wicked postnatal depression etc even in someone without a background like yours. You don't need to wall yourself off from ever having children but you do need to make sure, for yourself and your child, that you have the support you need if you feel your mental health hits a bumpy road.
It's so unpredictable whether or not generations of mental health issues are genetic or just passed on from seeing that behaviour constantly from a young age. If you want to have your own biological baby honestly I wouldn't worry about that as much as healing from any issues you think you might have and making sure to give them a stable and loving upbringing. Trauma raises trauma, if you don't seek help for anything you're struggling with, having a child will absolutely dig it all up and amplify it whether you're ready or not. You need to tough love yourself, hardcore, and get your shit together to have a baby.>>141439
I don't think anyone ever feels fully ready or feels definite confirmation that it's the right time, once you get over that initial weird panic about doing it, a few years in you just end up at that place. There's always going to be some nerves and fear.
I knew I wanted a child,but had no idea when. My husband and I planned to start trying when we got married but I actually got pregnant unexpectedly the year before that, aged 21 and my child is the centre. Of. My. Fucking. Universe. She changed me entirely, I would and will do anything for her, she will always be the love of my life. It was unexpected and a difficult pregnancy and there's always more to learn but you learn as you go.
Even though I had my child young, I don't bat an eyelid when I see women having their first child in their late thirties. It's all cool as long as you work hard and do your best. (Your actual best, not just "love is enough!" Best)
You don't need to be prepared for everything and know everything, at all, you need to be stable and secure and strong enough to work hard enough to prepare for what you can and adapt as you go and put your child first Post too long. Click here to view the full text.